Monsters and Ladybugs
by Kitteh and Neo
Summary: Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach. DADR
1. Sessions 1

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Reaperofhate

Chapter 01 

The Crazy House for boys had always housed the most insane minds around the city. It was where parents locked away the children who were no longer stable enough to think for themselves. Whenever one was committed to this certain building, there was a good chance the child would not come out for a long while. Only one soul had ever come out of The Crazy House as quick as he came in, but those days were no more.

Deep inside the building, on the lowest level, housed the most insane. Each room was bolted, and only few knew each code to get in. It was rare that even doctors came by to see the patients on this certain level, for fear of their manic behavior becoming too violent. The worst case of them all was on the furthest side of the room; a door to the very back. The patient who was behind the metal was usually quite silent, but for now the moment was different.

"He's going to kill you all!" The scream was heard from behind the locked door while the owner behind it tried to glare straight through the metal. There was an echo from the words and it had the small body of what was now a worn out and pasty Dib, shaking with manic laughter; a familiar sound that was laced with insanity. The sudden movement the shaking caused had him falling on his back, but the laughter never stopped, even as the straight jacket threatened to tighten with each noise and jerk. "He's going to kill you! All of you!" They would come. Someone would come and try to shut him up. It always happened. More pills and more shots, but he would continue to warn them. He would warn them until they all believed.

Ah yes, there they were, the careful foot steps of his silencers. One, two, three pairs of feet, truncating until there was only one that stopped in front of Dib's door.

There was muttering then, soft and decisive, one could only assumedly decipher it as 'This many more mil!', 'Up it this many G's!'. Whatever was spoken, the ending could clearly be heard as: 'Watch out for his big mouth, he bites'. There was an uneasy silence to that response.

But soon to follow was the musical sound of a code being pressed; the soft cryptic tune of beeping was changed after each visit. Some maddened music student had almost escaped learning the chord.

Immediately there was a buzz and the loud 'clack!' signaling thick locks giving and the metal door, with an angry groan, slid open.

It wasn't the usual doctor, with the thin lips, horribly long off-white teeth and loose latex gloves, brandishing his usual syringe of 'feel good', nor the large, burly, thick-necked nurse called Molly, who forced quiet-time pills down any orifice she could manage inside of Dib. No, this time it was something far more nostalgic that clacked their shoes into Dib's padded home. Unsure and disapproving glances had the small cell taken in, but something else fell on Dib, who was screaming something inane in the dead center of it all.

They gestured in some form of assured bravery for the door to be closed behind him, flinching when the final slam of metal came behind.

No rumbled tie this time, we wouldn't want anyone to fall and accidentally hang themselves; but every gesture, every pause and take of breath hadn't changed. But this time, this visit was his to make. "Dib?" they forced hesitation out of their voice. "Dib, can you hear me?" Text book, completely text book.

It wasn't the noises outside the room or even the slam of the door which got Dib's attention; he had actually gotten very used to those over the years. Instead, what had him sitting upright so quickly was the sound of a voice. No one had ever tried to speak to him in so long. The usual doctors and nurses who came with his medication just did their business and left. There were no visitors and he had accepted that. All he had come to hear was his own voice.

Just as quickly as Dib sat up, he had scurried back towards the farthest wall in the cell. His body was used to the straight jacket, so there was little to no struggling on his part while trying to hurry away. As soon as his back hit the wall, he huddled down and kept his eyes near the door, looking past the figures, never at them. "Get out of my head! I'm not crazy! He's going to do it! Stop telling me things!"

The figure at the door was startled at the outburst, watching Dib with wide eyes for a long moment, until the padded walls ate the echo of the boy's scream. They didn't near Dib, not a step closer did they move. No medicines, clip boards, pen, or note pad, no stack of inkblots that all looked like aliens of some sort accompanied them; just one stark man that kept respectfully on his side of the padded cell.

"Do you recognize me, Dib?" they continued on in that same calm, careful tone. "It's been a long while, so you might not remember me. But I've come to visit you today." They pressed their fingers together in front of themselves in a habitually serious gesture.

The silence that came over the small room was tense, and all that could be heard was Dib's harsh breathing. The boy's eyes darted around the room, as if trying to find an actual way to escape the figure that had invaded his personal domain. When nothing was of any help he started to jerk and twist around in the straight jacket, but nothing was of any use. "I know who you are." The words came out shaky and demented. "You're one of them; one of the ones that eat away at my mind. You're one of the reasons why they won't let me out of here." Slow quiet laughter started to form beneath his voice. "You've actually come to life. I knew you would one day."

There was the briefest of pauses as the other near the door let his hands fall gently at his sides; hidden disappointment, but he shouldn't have expected much else.

"I'm Mr. Dwicky." They forced a wide smile; a practiced smile that was learned years ago back when he was- "I was your old skool counselor, way back when." The man made his smile a little wider, a little more optimistic. "Do you remember? I've come to talk to you. Today."

The laughter slowly died away at those words. Dib's fearful expression softened somewhat, and, if one was to look hard enough, there could have been a bit of recognition in his eyes. Just as soon as any of it had passed, it was all gone just as quickly. "Liar." The word had come out harsh and whispered. "Liar, liar, liar." His whole body moved away from the floor as he struggled to stand. "He's gone. You're not him." With weak steps, he walked towards the man. His head stayed bowed the entire time, refusing to look at who he considered to be an imposter. "You've come to hurt me. Why do you want to hurt me?"

Dwicky straightened, but didn't step away as Dib teetered nearer. His eyes kept on the boy, never leaving although the other seemed damned if he were going to acknowledge him with a look.

The man's voice didn't falter, but fell quieter, falling to deep rooted sincerity, in hopes that Dib would at least understand the next words said. "I'm back now, Dib. It is me, I am Mr. Dwicky. I don't want to hurt you." The man's hands rose, though he would have liked to place them calmingly on Dib's shoulders. He knew better than to connect physically just yet. If anything, they stayed poised, to prove harmlessness. "I've never wanted to hurt you. I want to help you. I've come here to help you."

Dib continued to take uneasy steps towards the other until he suddenly stopped. His whole body swayed just a few inches from the man, and it seemed as if he were in danger of falling over. "Help me?" A small quiet giggle came from the boy's lips before he finally lifted his head to stare the other in the face. He leaned his whole body forward, having to stand on wobbly tip-toes to actually get face to face, not even that being enough. "You want to help me? Dwicky didn't want to help me. You're a liar." Another quiet laugh came from him before he backed off. "Liar, liar."

"I did. I really did." Dwicky answered quietly back, not about to speak loudly at Dib's close proximity. "And I still do. That's why I came back." He kept his eyes lowered on the boy, on his face. Something was missing, something Dwicky had to recall back from memories of an animated, hyper child who did everything for everyone but himself. Though it would explain why Dib was constantly squinting.

A hand finally settled on Dib's shoulder, the action obvious, like you would to a wild animal as to not startle it. It was just a touch enough to keep Dib from a new stagger so he wouldn't fall over in his animosity. "I came back for you," Dwicky spoke then, finishing quietly with the boy's name "Dib." There was a brief pause as Dwicky quickly forced himself to continue "To help you... get better."

Dib's eyes went from the other's face to quickly land on the sudden hand that was on his own shoulder. Once again he found himself struggling with the straight jacket, but he gave up quicker than last time. His whole body slumped and he let his eyes fall from the hand to the floor. "Dwicky..." There had been no manic tone or laughter trailing with the name. It was just empty and hollow as it was said.

As soon as the name left his mouth though, Dib went rigid once again. He struggled to move the hand off of his shoulder and backed once again towards the wall. His eyes stayed glued on Dwicky, even as he started to mumble. "You know. You can tell them. You know everything. Then everyone can be okay again and I can stop him."

Careful fingers curled within themselves as soon as the touch of worn fabric left, the hand itself lowered but never truly returned back to the man's side. Something in Dwicky perked, it could be heard in the man's voice, it brightened. "Yes, Dwicky." Dib did remember, a sliver, a sliver was all that Dwicky needed right now.

"Stop who, Dib?" the man voiced, slowly shaking his head. "There's no one to stop. I know just as much as everyone else; just as much as you."

There was no piece of furniture, no bed, no luxury of any sort, save for worn out padding against the walls for one to bash their worries straight out of their skull. Otherwise Dwicky would have invited Dib to 'have a seat, and a nice chat' (a horrid counselor habit), but there was nothing but the scruffy, questionable looking floor. So the man took as pacifistic a step as he could towards Dib, stopping at one to see how the boy took an approach.

"Zim!" The name was shouted so loudly that it surely would have echoed outside the large metal door. Dib's wide gaze moved away from Dwicky, even as the man approached, just so he could look down at the floor and anything in between. "I have to stop Zim. I have to get out of here. I can't stay in here. Without me there to stop him, he'll do it." He suddenly moved his eyes back up to Dwicky, as if, just then, realizing that the other was walking towards him. He pushed back against the wall as best he could, while shaking his head. "Stay away from me."

The man stilled himself. He'd long stopped, but, now, even his breath halted for that moment, his thick brows furrowing. Like that, he stayed.

'Zim.' Zim, Zim, _Zim_. Dwicky knew the name well; how could he not when it had been that very same name that had been on the boy's tongue every sentence, every subject? It had been so cute and comical then, that obsessiveness; obsessive-compulsive disorder to cover up some sort of repressed childhood trauma, or perhaps hidden homosexual tension. But this wasn't some silly little play ground crush. Not anymore.

"Dib..." Dwicky strained the boy's name softly. "The world is fine. _Earth_ is fine. It's been several years since you've played that silly game with... Zim." The other boy's name felt so foreign, awkward on Dwicky's tongue, but he said it as simply as he could. "Nothing has happened." He fanned out his hands loosely at his sides in gesture "As you can see, everyone is fine. Everything is perfectly normal." His hands lowered and so did his voice, so carefully "There's nothing to worry about anymore, Dib."

Dib's wide eyes slowly started to narrow. "Game..." His sudden fear of Dwicky seemed to be put on hold as he stared at the man with an intense gaze. "What game?" Instead of waiting for an answer, he went on, still struggling to press back against the wall, in case Dwicky decided to step forward again. "He's still out there. Nothing is normal in here. Nothing is normal at all. You remember right? You remember everything, right before they took you away." His struggling ceased after those few words, and he tried to huddle in on himself, but the jacket refused him the comfort. "He's going to kill you all, and it will be my fault. It's all going to be my fault. I have to get out; you have to let me out."

All that came of Dwicky was a slow shake of head, and a softer edge came to a usually wide pretentious smile. When he settled his eyes back on Dib, it was upon that once sharp jut of black hair that flagged the top of the boy's head, now as frayed as the boy's nerves were.

"You've gotten much taller since I've last seen you." Dwicky smiled a little more in his voice than on his mouth. "Always a person of great responsibility, even at a young age; always wanting to do so much for so many. I'm sure you've done a lot of great things. But... what about you, Dib?"

"They won't let me go." Those were the only words that came from Dib for a long while after what Dwicky had asked. The boy's eyes had moved back down to stare at the padded floor, looking at each small tear that had been made in the fabric over the years. Slowly, one of his legs moved out away from his body. His feet wiggled inside the worn out sock that was on his foot, his boots having been taken away long ago as a precaution. None of the doctors wanted to be kicked upside the head during one of his fits.

"They talk to me." Dib continued to speak, even as he placed his foot on the floor and began to move his toes around in circles, "Voices in my head. They tell me that I failed. They tell me that it's all going to be over soon." His toes continued to move in small, uneven patterns against the padding. After a few seconds, he lifted his eyes to stare back at Dwicky with empty eyes. "I've done nothing great. Why do you think I'm here?"

Dwicky's gaze shifted closed, but never moved from Dib; he couldn't. "You're a good kid, Dib. I know you are." His vision followed from the boy's hollow expression to the buckles, straps to the sad worn sock and lonely toes that traced the tantrum beaten floor. When Dwicky's gaze was brought back, it was in a pang that he wish didn't show in but a subtle look. "That's why I came back to this town: to see you." Professionalism stole away the personal emotion welling somewhere, be it pity, or guilt, it had to be set aside; for now… for this. "Dib... I'd like to visit you more often; keep you company in this… freaky estate. Be your personal counciler." There was a pause as he pressed his fingertips together, nervous and hopeful at the same time. "I'd come to visit each day. We can talk about anything you'd like; anything that you want to get off your chest." A hand parted from the other, reaching subtly to Dib in a kind gesture. "I'm here to listen to you. I'm not going anywhere. Not this time, I promise." Dwicky smiled a little more, nodding dark stray hair onto his line of sight. "I'm here to stay."

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky for a few moments longer, before he let them fall back down to his foot. His expression turned to confusion, as if he didn't remember even moving his leg out in the first place, and quickly pulled it back as close as he could. "You lied to me." Even as he spoke Dib kept his eyes down and his voice low. There was a faraway tone to his voice as he continued, "You said you believed me. You hurt me. Everyone wants to hurt me. I just want to help, but no one wants to listen." Once again Dib raised his head to look the other in the eyes, his head titling to the side as he studied the figure across from him. "You believe me now, right? Listening means you believe, right?"

"Listening means I believe in you, Dib." There was a gentle nod to match. "I lied because I believed in you; I wanted to help. I was there to hear the real problem. And I'm here now to hear it again. I'll listen to whatever it is that you want to say. I'm here to talk about your problems; about what hurts." Dwicky took another step towards Dib, hoping the order to 'stay back' was forgotten and discarded. "Anything; about your home, your family… about the fact," he stopped before he was too close, giving the fidgety boy room enough for personal space, and then some. "That must hurt;" a finger pointed to between Dib's eyes, "no glasses."

Dib made no move to press further against the wall. His only concern was the words which had come from Dwicky's mouth. "You said it again. You said you believe me." After a few seconds, the small trance was broken, and his attention was once again grabbed by the finger pointing towards his face. "Hurt?" He went cross eyed for a few seconds, trying to look down his own nose, but gave up trying to see and looked away to the side. "It doesn't hurt anymore. They hurt me a lot in here, anyway." A small grin came over his face, and it seemed as if he was talking more to himself than to Dwicky. "No, Dib, put the needle down! Don't bite the doctor, Dib! Stop being so unstable, Dib!"

"Hmm." Dwicky's finger pointed lower "That would explain the new jacket." A weak sort of grin spread on his face, in a strange way, because of Dib's. There was something relieving to see a smile on the other's face, no matter how twisted or demented; it was nice to know that he was still able to, for whatever reasoning.

Another step, another few measurements closed the gap, the calm look still kept on the man's face. "But I'll keep on saying it. If you give me a reason to, I'll believe in you." Dwicky stopped when he was close enough to speak softly, "I'll hear what no one else wants to hear."

Dib's head snapped back to look up at Dwicky, the sudden closeness causing him to be on alert. The grin that had been on his face disappeared immediately, and only a blank expression came over his face at the words the other spoke. For a long while, he continued to just sit near the wall, until he finally struggled to stand. His back slid across the wall as he gained some balance on his feet and wasn't in any danger of falling. With careful steps, he walked the last few steps up to Dwicky, and stopped only when he was right in front of the other. "If you believe… then the voices will leave. I don't want to hear them anymore…" He refused to look up, continuing to keep his head down the entire time. "Then everything can go back to normal. I want that. Please make them leave."

It was then, that a hand rested atop Dib's head, softly ruffling the dark greasy black hair. Fingers gently smoothed the frazzled hair back after kindly, gently thumbing down the thick lock of hair that always stood up. It, of course, immediately sprung back up.

"I'll make them leave." Dwicky spoke quietly and assuredly "I'll do everything I can," his hand kept on the boy's head, sagely, as if swearing to what he rested his palm upon, "to make things better." His hand fell away just enough to brush away the few temperamental strands of hair from the boy's forehead, that Dib didn't have his own privilege to brush away. "I'm here for you."

The soft touches easily had Dib flinching. His knees buckled just a bit as he tried to move his head away from the hand that rested on top of it. It was the small touches that bushed hair away from his face which had him stopping. He tried to stand straight once again, but this time he lifted his eyes up to stare up at Dwicky, allowing their eyes to meet. "They say you're lying. They tell me not to believe you; that you're just going to leave me again." His eyes quickly moved away to the side; towards the metal door behind Dwicky. "I think they're just afraid. Afraid that you're going to make them go away. They scream at me when the doctors come in and give me the pills. Now that you're here they're worse."

"I won't leave you. I'm not going anywhere." Either hand settled warmly on Dib's shoulder. "I promise." The hands gently squeezed assuredly on Dib's shoulders. "I'll stay here, and talk with you, for as long as you need me. We'll work through this, Dib." One hand relented to nudge the boy's head up with a knuckle under his chin. "Alright? We can do this. I believe you can do this." A warm smile greeted down at Dib optimistically.

Wide eyes met Dwicky once again as Dib stared up at him. All of the touching… it was too much. There wasn't supposed to be so much touching. So, with a strangled noise Dib quickly backed away from it all, until he was, once again, near the safety of the wall. He refused to look away from Dwicky the entire time though, and kept eye contact even as he huddled back down to the floor.

It was a few more moments until he spoke up in the cell, his voice small, and a bit scared. "I screwed up again. It's why I'm here. It's why I can't do anything anymore… I messed up so he threw me in here. Everyone is in danger… because I made a big mistake… and now my dad hates me even more."

Dwicky's hands had lowered back down to his sides. He didn't fidget. Instead, he slipped them into his pockets. "What did you do?" Sure he knew… he read Dib's file cover to cover, several times over, each second word met with 'delusional', 'schizophrenic', and to follow, each other word was that other boy's name; but Dwicky wanted to hear it from Dib's mouth. That was what was meant to be heard. "Tell me, Dib." Carefully, Dwicky squatted down, bringing himself to be on equal height with the boy, but never nearing, breeching that sanctuary of space Dib had animatedly jerked back into. "Tell me what happened to put you in here."

Dib watched the other carefully, listening to the words, but not answering right away. His eyes slowly moved back down to the floor after he was sure Dwicky wouldn't move another inch, scanning each little small mark that had ever been made in the padding. "All I've ever done is try to help." His voice started out distant as the words were said. "Every time something horrible happened, it was never my fault. I was just trying to save everyone. That day was no different from the rest." His eyes began to close halfway, as if he were about to fall asleep, as he was talking. "He was in my house. He had gotten in the lab somehow… We were fighting. I knocked over one of the inventions… I didn't mean to… I swear I didn't…!" His head jerked up and his eyes snapped back open, as his attention was once again on Dwicky. "I didn't mean to do it! I don't want to be in here!"

Dwicky gave a listening nod. He knew exactly who Dib spoke of. No one else came so obsessively over the boy's tongue so often; then, and now. But Dwicky regarded the boy with obvious listening intent. That's what Dib needed right now. "So, what happened next, Dib? What happened after you knocked over your dad's things?" He quietly coaxed the boy to continue on.

Dib's eyes fell away once more, back down to the safety of the floor. "It started to eat away at things. Whatever was in it started to eat away at everything around." His teeth went for the collar of the jacket, biting at the worn place in the fabric. It took a few moments for him to continue, only barely letting go of the material. "'You're an annoyance, Dib. What just happened never should have ever happened. If you were normal, then everything would be okay. I can't stand this anymore. My work is suffering because of you.'" Slowly, his eyes moved back to Dwicky once again, his expression hurt. "I remember all the words he said, see? Every single sentence. I watched him yell it all in my face."

Dwicky gave a small patient nod, assuring Dib, in that one simple gesture, that he wasn't making things up. "That must have made you feel horrible." He rested himself more comfortably on his feet, his legs growing cramped. In the end, he knelt on one leg and kept one foot on the floor, resting an arm on the propped up leg. "To have such things yelled at you by your dad. You look up to your father, don't you? You just want his attention and praise, right? But he's a very busy man, I hear."

Dib didn't even seem at all startled as Dwicky moved around; instead he just stared at the man for a few more moments, before looking down at the socks on his feet. "I wanted his attention most of all. He always works though. Never home… barely home. He didn't believe me when I tried to tell him what happened... When I tried to tell him the reason we were down there. He yelled at me while Zim was still there. He called them while Zim was still there. Zim watched them take me…" His eyes shut tightly at such a memory, and his whole body began to shake beneath the jacket. "Failure… My fault… All my fault… Such a failure."

"No." Dwicky shook his head as he continued to speak, quietly denying Dib's words, "No Dib, you aren't a failure. You aren't. This..-" he caught himself leaning forward, compulsively drawn, wanting to steady the shaking, but too afraid of losing what little ground he'd gotten to a silly thing like touch. "This isn't anyone's fault. You thought you were doing the right thing. But that was then. It's okay to let go of it; to let go of the hate… to let go of the fight…" An unsure hand rose, halting, before it actually touched… but something pushed it forward to rest, for just a moment, on Dib's shoulder, just a few seconds of assurance as he spoke. "To move on." Then it fell away, respecting that Dib couldn't exactly swat it away. "It's time to worry about you, Dib; the world can take care of itself."

"No, it can't." The words were harsh when they came from Dib's mouth. He didn't even jump at the touch to his shoulder, too deep into his own thoughts and ramblings to care about contact. "It needs me. No one knows what he's capable of. I can't keep sitting here while he keeps planning to destroy everything. Dad thinks I'm insane… I'm not insane... I'm really not... I can prove I'm not. If they would just listen to me... If they would just trust me..." His eyes slowly opened only halfway, but didn't focus on anything in particular, his body still just slightly shaking. "Why doesn't anyone want to see it? It's all so clear. Why am I the only one that can see?"

Fingers took either side of Dib's jaw, firmly, to turn the boy's attention back to the man before him. "Dib… Dib, listen to me." Dwicky started firmly, waiting until the boy's disorientated gaze fell on him, before he continued on in a quiet, but definite tone. "There's nothing _to_ see. There is nothing _to_ prove. _Zim_ is not an alien. There are no such things as aliens. No one has found any proof; it's all propaganda, all of it… Lies; lies by the media." A small sort of sound left Dwicky, dashing a dream, making a perfect reality; it was hurtful, but he couldn't let it be known. Dwicky smiled weakly, his brows furrowed heavily. "The world has survived since before you and I were born. And it will keep on surviving, even after we die. You have to stop playing this destructive game… It isn't real; just like the voices. You have to stop if you want the voices to stop."

For a few seconds, Dib just stared up at Dwicky with a blank expression. The words the man said went through his head, and suddenly they clicked. "Liar..." The word was whispered, but then it was screamed. "**Liar**!" He struggled weakly, trying his best to get out of Dwicky's grasp and back to his sanctuary against the wall. "Stop lying to me! Stop doing it!" He pressed back as hard as he could, while keeping careful, wide eyes on the other. "You said you believed me! You said listening meant you believed me! Stop lying!"

Dwicky didn't want to let go. He wanted to grasp the front of the boy's straight jacket, and shake the common sense back into the boy; the roundabout conversation was exasperating and, most of all, disheartening. The other had been such an intelligent individual. It was horrific, this sight; just to see everything gone so horribly wrong.

But Dwicky relented his hold, letting Dib stay as closely pressed to the padded wall as he liked. It wouldn't keep him from speaking the written and rehearsed, social-norm-dictated common sense. "It's true, Dib. All of it. You know what I say is true, too." With a gentle sigh, Dwicky ran his hand through his hair, messing the already ragged condition of it just that much more. "And if you want to be normal, if you want to get out of here… you have to believe me." He pressed his lips together in a careful line, before he spoke on so very, very gently, "I would never lie to you."

"You lied to me that night." The words were once again distant as they came from Dib's mouth, his tantrum over, for the moment. His head bowed down once he was sure he was safe, and his eyes moved once more to the floor. "They took you away from me… you were supposed to be my partner. No one ever listened to me before. It's all I wanted, and you lied to me… then left me." A small, sad noise came from him. "It wasn't fair. You saw it all... You were supposed to help me tell everyone. They would all know, and everyone would be okay." He let his eyes trail back up, every bit of hurt from that memory clear on his face. "I want my camera back."

"I was humouring you." Dwicky's voice fell quiet, his wound from the tortured scene before him. "There are real problems in your life, not aliens." He sat up a little, rubbing the back of his neck, letting his gaze travel about the room; how unsavory, but assured no one wanted to be bothered being in the same room with the insane to clean up after, when it would most likely just happen again. "Besides, what happened that night, it was just a hoax. It wasn't real. I left for somewhere else a while. But… I'm back." He looked back to the boy, apologies in his gaze as his hand fell back to his side. "I'm back for good now. And I want to know you Dib. Not silly things about aliens, space ships, UFOs… but you… you, Dib." His head lowered closer to his chest, before raising with new optimistic energies. "You matter. I'll still be your partner… I'll make sure your voice is heard. But this time about who you are, how you feel, and what you need in life. I won't let you sink into this... _hell_." Dwicky loosely gestured to the surroundings with contempt.

"It's all I know." Dib's whole body tensed up at his own words, and, for a few seconds, he closed his eyes again. It took him a few moments to continue, his eyes barely opening to look back to the floor. "It's all I knew, and all I had. If I stop believing, I won't have anything, but everyone hates what I believe in. I've always liked strange things. Everything that was normal always bored me." He finally raised his eyes again, to make sure Dwicky was still listening; to make sure he was being heard. "It's why I didn't want to follow after Dad. Everything about the job is boring… I hate it… I can't do what I want, though, because then I'm even more of a disappointment. It's why I'm here, because I'm a disappointment." His teeth clamped around the collar of the jacket once more after the words, his eyes traveling to the side of the padded cell.

A small chuckle left Dwicky. He couldn't help it; relief was flooding over him, he had to make some sort of happy noise. It was probably ill-timed, but Dib was coming back, Dib was acting… like Dib!

"There is life beyond the belief of aliens, Dib." Dwicky couldn't help the new smile befalling him, he actually felt it now; it didn't need to be forced anymore. "I'm proof of that aren't I? I'm sure you'll find new and just as exciting interests. And, I'm sure you'll find an employment that will make your dad proud of you. There's a whole world out there, Dib. You just need to find yourself in it. Like," Dwicky leaned back and rubbed his goatee thoughtfully with the side of his finger, "what else do you like? What other things catch your fancy? Tell me about those." He ended his words with a grin.

Dib's eyes narrowed at the small noises Dwicky made. His teeth tugged harder on the straight jacket for a few more moments, until they finally let go, just so he could turn his gaze to the other. "Other things?" His expression turned confused, and, for awhile, he just stared. He suddenly looked completely lost, and began to huddle in on himself as best he could, once more. "I don't know what other things I like… I remember my room. All that I had in my room were pictures of aliens and other paranormal things. I can't even remember there ever being anything else." His wide eyes snapped back towards Dwicky. "I don't know. I don't..."

"It's alright. It's alright, Dib." Dwicky motioned for the boy not to worry, to not get excited. "Just, think of things you like; little things, and go from there. Like, being outside… Everyone likes doing things outdoors; sports… did you enjoy any particular sport? Soccer? Football?" He cleared his throat a moment, trying not to be amused. The idea of such a thin, high strung boy playing as a line backer wasn't exactly evident by the pasty colour of his skin. "Track and field?" Dwicky's gaze fell to the ceiling, trying to grasp at anything. "Gardening? Going to the beach? Golf?" He went back to rubbing his goatee as he settled his gaze back on the sallow boy; perhaps he was hitting left field with outdoors. Dwicky clicked his tongue, gaze flicking down to the horrible unflattering beige of the straight jacket. "Fashion?" Up he looked back at Dib's face; internally he flinched; now that was truly left field.

"Animals." The word came out quiet and timid from Dib's own mouth and, even after it was said, he quickly shook his head. "No, not animals, I hate animals. Bugs. I like bugs." He stopped speaking and just stared at Dwicky, watching to see if the man would laugh at him for what he said… if any sort of ridicule would come from the other across from him. When there was nothing, he kept on, still just as quiet. "I like to watch how they move. I like to watch how they crawl..." He tried to bury his face further inside the jacket as he went on, with more memories. "I used to have an ant farm when I was little, but my sister took it outside and… burned every single one of them. All because I took the batteries out of her game for a project I had to complete."

"There you go." Dwicky pointed out "What about being a bug scientist of some sort? Going around and discovering new bugs? Or… collecting bugs? That could make a good new hobby." He leaned back a moment "Ya know, I think I had one of those things: an ant farm. But I think I accidentally knocked it over, smashing dirt and ants all over my bedroom floor." He made a small, thoughtful hum. "The house had to be fumigated, much to my chagrin." Dwicky tapped his pointer fingers together, in a rather guilty fashion. "I would still find an ant, or two, in the sugar bowl." He chuckled gently.

Dib's head perked up a bit at Dwicky's words. For a few moments, he stared before moving, just a bit, away from the wall, and using his feet to slide him a few inches forward. Before he got too close, he immediately stopped and pulled his feet back, as if Dwicky would bite them off. "It seems boring, those jobs. I wouldn't want something that I like to become boring." His eyes went to the side of the cell once more, as he continued. "I miss sitting on my roof. There used to be fireflies outside; so many of them that I forgot what were actually stars. One time I actually caught one… I thought that when I opened my hands it would fly away, but it didn't. It just kept moving and walking." He looked at Dwicky out of the corner of his eye. "I pulled the light off, just to see what would happen. I wanted to see what it would do."

Dwicky opened his mouth but he closed it, considering Dib with a watchful sort of look. He kept as he was; a listening constant. "And, what happened Dib?" he quietly asked, his voice falling solemn.

A horrible grin came over Dib's face in that moment. "It was still moving. It was still okay, so I didn't stop. I pulled off everything else." His eyes moved back to the wall. "First the wings… then the legs, one by one. It struggled a lot, but I didn't stop. I wanted to see what happened to the very end. I pulled off the antennae, next. That's when it started to slow down. I watched it too. I placed what was left of it down on my roof and watched it." His eyes turned back to Dwicky once more, the grin that was on his face gone and replaced by a small frown. "It stopped moving. I did so much… just to make it stop moving."

Slowly, Dib struggled to move himself towards Dwicky. The jacket made it hard on him, but he was able to scoot forward a bit on his knees and with the help of his feet. He only stopped when he was face to face with the man, leaning forward just so he could invade the other's personal space; just like his own had been. "I didn't mean to make it stop. I just wanted to watch. I just wanted to see what would happen, I swear."

Dwicky softly exhaled; a heavy breath. "Dib…" he started, but there wasn't much more to be said, when it really was so obvious. "Dib…" A hand rose to draw just two fingers ever so lightly on the boy's unhealthily coloured cheeks; there were no tears to wipe away, but the expression on the boy's face had him doing it anyway. "Things are fragile. Bugs, animals, birds… even people." His hand fell away. "You pick someone apart enough, physically, verbally, they'll just stop too. Everyone has limits; that's why we're born with compassion."

At first, the touch was met with wide eyes, but, after a few seconds, Dib slowly relaxed instead of backing away, like usual. "No one I've known has had compassion… not towards me." His eyes fell halfway, but even then their focus stayed on the man in front of him. "I've been picked apart a lot, in every kind of way. It does hurt; all of it hurts. I want to make everyone proud, but that means being something I hate." He allowed his eyes to open back up, as his head tilted away from Dwicky's hand, his eyes intense as he studied the other. "You like what you do, right?"

Dwicky gave an easy nod. "Of course." He couldn't help knitting his hands together, resting one arm on his knee in automation, a work habit that just never went away. "I wanted to help kids like I was once who have a lot of aspiration but nowhere to put it; so they don't end up as lost with themselves as I was, putting all my belief into something that will never help me in my moment of need." He tweaked his lips before giving a slight chuckle. "So, I do have compassion for you Dib. I wouldn't be here if I didn't." Dwicky let out a slight amused sound. "I don't know if I'd recommend being a counselor. People can be weird, almost alien-like if you really want to get down to it. Ya know?"

"Alien..." The word fell easily from Dib's lips, and his eyes moved down to the floor between them after it was said. For a few moments, the word was mumbled under his breath as some form of mantra to himself. It took awhile until any real sentences came from him, and, even then, he refused to lift his head again. "Why me? If there are others you could help, then why do you need to see me so badly? They say I'm dangerous to anyone around me. You shouldn't be near me. They shouldn't have let you near me. I'm just going to fail you… like I did everyone else."

"Dib. Look." Dwicky loosely rested his hands out to gesture between them. "Look at this," he went on in a positive note, "We've been having a civil conversation for at least an hour now. That means something. It means a lot." Fingers slowly curled back towards his palm, and Dwicky looked down to them, opening and closing, finding the privileged action obscure when in the company of the restrained. "It means I can help you, Dib. I want to help you." He stopped, tucking his hands back as he realized it was probably rude to have them obviously about. Dwicky looked back at Dib. "I wanted to. I'll make up for leaving you. I won't fail you. Just like I know you won't fail me." He relinquished the serious mood with a cheerful smile. "Okay?"

Dib raised his head back up at the final words. His eyes moved around Dwicky's face before they settled on the man's eyes once more. "You won't fail me. Everything will be okay… the voices will leave, and everything will be okay. I'll be able to leave, because it will all be okay." Slowly, he nodded his head as if that would help him believe what he was saying out loud all the more easily. "I want that. I don't want anyone to hurt me anymore. I want out of here." For a few seconds, he struggled against the jacket, hating the fact, in that moment, that he was wearing it. Not being able to get out of it any time soon, he gave in, and looked up at the other with sad eyes, his teeth worrying at his bottom lip before he spoke again. "I really do want everything to be normal again, Dwicky..."

An assuring smile was offered. "I'm glad to hear that." The smile widened, trying to relay something genuine in it. Hope; that's what Dib needed again. Dwicky could only feel the relief in it. "It will be. Everything will be fine again. We'll work together on it." He nodded affirming it.

There was a slight digital lilt of numeric buttons being coded in, the clunk of locks, and, soon, the groan of a door, signaling that visiting hours were over.

Dib's head snapped towards the door. The calm gaze that had come over his face suddenly turned fearful, and he quickly backed away towards the wall, as close as he could, once again; away from the door that usually meant more horrible things instead of actual freedom. Once Dib was sure that he was safe enough, his eyes moved back to Dwicky, a pleading look inside them. A slight noise came from him, before he spoke up in barely a whisper. "Don't leave. You said you wouldn't leave… please don't lie again."

Dwicky knelt alone for a moment, his gaze never leaving Dib's. He couldn't snap it away from Dib's desperately wide, worried eyes; there hadn't been much change between the little Dib of three years ago, who ran around in a small black trench coat, and the one who shivered tightly against the wall in a straight jacket.

"C'mon, Dwicky." The thick necked orderly growled, keeping his eye on the well-known nuisance shuddering at the far end; had he had his way, Dib would have been muzzled, hog tied, and kept in a broom closet. "Let's get going."

Falteringly, Dwicky rose, his shirt staying rumpled. "I'm not lying Dib. I can't stay over night." He tried to keep his voice friendly and encouraging, "I'll be back tomorrow. I promise." He gestured a palm in the boy's direction, patting the air assuagingly when he knew the other wouldn't want to be touched now. "So… be a good boy, alright?"

Dib ignored the orderly completely, for once in his entire time staying in the cell, just so he could keep his eyes on Dwicky as the man stood. "Promise..." He echoed the word loudly so that it bounced off the walls before slowly nodding his head in understanding. "I'll be good. I'll be good because you'll come back. I promise I'll be good." He huddled closer to the wall and, finally, let his eyes travel to the other figure in the room. His voice changed drastically when he spoke up next time, his tone harsh and cruel as he stared straight at the orderly. "Go away. I didn't do anything, so go away."

It wasn't a kind look that came to Dib in return: sneering yellow teeth, with a scowl to match. "Yea, I'll be back to give ya yer meds. Then we'll see who's fool'n who with this 'good boy' cr-"

"I'm coming, I'm coming… I'm going." Dwicky cut the other off, back pedaling a moment to keep his watch on Dib. He offered one last smile, though he wished it hadn't been so pained as well. "I'll see you tomorrow, Dib." He raised a hand to give a slight wave; it lingered in the air then lowered before he turned to walk out, pushing past the large orderly.

Dib's eyes immediately went back to Dwicky, and a sad expression replaced the hateful one that had been on his face. He watched the other leave out the door and struggled, once more, against the jacket, just to try and free an arm so that he could wave back; it's all he wanted to do. Dwicky was gone, though, and the fact had his whole body slumping over, giving up its fight against the jacket. He turned his eyes back to the orderly, before quickly turning away and leaning against the wall he huddled near.

The orderly cussed something fierce under his breath Dib's way, but he backed away so the thick metal door could shut loud and coldly, the locks clicking back in a mocking sort of laughter.

Then the pair of footsteps could be heard moving away, spats hesitant on the grungy tile of the lower levels. But it all eventually faded into the rest of the maddening sounds of the adolescent mental institution, which echoed only to dissolve.


	2. Sessions 2

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Reaperofhate

Chapter 02 

Nothing really changed the next day in the small nut house; buses came and went to drop off more children, which made one wonder if there were any boys left in the city at all. Screams could still be heard from certain doors inside. The only thing that had really changed on this day was the eerie silence coming from the cell which belonged to Dib. There was no noise, no sounds, and no tantrums being thrown against already tattered walls. It was just perfectly silent. This, normally, would have bothered anyone else with a sane mind, but why should the doctors _want_ to actually upset someone they had tried to shut up, day in and day out? For now, they could deal with the quiet.

It had begun much the same way as it had before. The sounds of voices, external to all people's heads, came from far off, growing more and more obvious as they neared the reserved and occupied cell. That voice, _his_ voice could be heard muffled behind metal, and all else that made the condensed, sturdy, suffocating, paint-chipping walls.

_Beep - click - groan_; and there, Dwicky was, standing in the door frame of Dib's cell, regretfully still tie-less, but that was a fault of doctors and their faith. A little quiet wasn't enough to persuade any favors… not just yet.

Dwicky turned from looking at the orderly, walking in with hands in his pockets, into the shabby, padded room. Immediately, he smiled as casually and perfectly, as if he were meeting Dib outside the walls. "Hello, Dib."

Still huddled against that same wall was the same small figure from before. At the mention of his name, Dib slowly turned his head to look towards the door, and blinked wide eyes at the figure that stood in front of it. There was obvious disbelief in his expression for a few seconds, but it slowly melted away, as did everything else.

Carefully, Dib slid up the wall so that he could stand and take small steps towards Dwicky, one at a time. He kept his eyes down on his feet the entire time, until he saw the man's shoes in front of him. Only then, did he finally lift his eyes to the other's face, while stopping right where he was. "I was good. You told me to be good, so I was." Just the hint of a smile came over his face. It was really hard to keep it from showing. "I kept my promise, and you kept yours. You really didn't lie."

Dwicky beamed a grin down at the boy, everything cheerful brought forth at that small tweak of lips Dib had given him. "Of course I didn't. I'll be coming everyday from now on, too, to see you; to talk." He raised his head to look at the cleanest wall of the four around them and gestured to it with a warm movement. "Let's have a seat, shall we? I want to give you something."

Dib blinked his eyes at those last words, his whole body straightening up a bit. "Give me something?" He couldn't help the anxiousness that showed through on his face, and, immediately, he turned away from Dwicky to look over at the wall which the other had motioned to. He began to bite at the jacket once more as he walked slowly towards the wall. It didn't take long until he was slowly sliding down the padded fabric, sitting down with his knees as close to his chest as the jacket would allow. He turned his eyes quickly back to Dwicky and let the jacket fall from his mouth, his tone slightly nervous as he spoke. "Give, please..."

Dwicky had to silently marvel at the dexterity and coordination the boy still had, considering he had no use of his arms whatsoever. It was something he rather admired; a determination, despite the rather objective setting.

In a moment, Dwicky crouched carefully in front of Dib, settling when they were near eye level. "Now, listen: you have to be absolutely careful with this, alright? You have to hold completely still. It's very fragile, and can break rather easily. You can't jerk around or thrash, understand?" he explained in all seriousness. "I don't want you to get hurt."

Dib listened to the warning that was told to him, and after a few seconds of staring at the other, he slowly began to nod his head. "I'll be careful. I'll do what you say; I'll listen." He fidgeted a bit beneath the jacket, his body moving around, as he continued to gaze at Dwicky. "Please, can I have it now?"

Dwicky nodded once. "Close your eyes, please. Hold still." He gave an assuring smile for Dib not to worry.

Dib bit at his lower lip for a few seconds after told what to do, but slowly he gave in, if only because of the reassurance of the other. His nervous fidgeting stopped, and he finally let his eyes slip closed.

There were soft sounds of shuffling, clothes brushing against each other with the movement of retrieval. Then, to follow, a soft sort of clacking and something thin brushed either side of Dib's temples lightly. Cool, familiar, sliding along either side of the boy's face, guided by the man's fingers, until a light weight rested on its usual mark; on Dib's nose. The frame was gently straightened to perfection and Dwicky's hands retracted as he spoke a soft, 'There'.

"You can open your eyes now, Dib," Dwicky announced, satisfied.

Dib had tried to stay calm through the whole ordeal. He tried to keep remembering not to lash out. No harm was being done to him; there was nothing to worry about. Even as he felt metal against his skin, he still kept as calm as he could.

It was the words that had him finally opening his eyes and allowing his nerves to settle. Seeing the one across from him made things easier, but seeing the one across him clearer than before had a small startled noise coming from his mouth. "I can see you." His eyes narrowed in confusion from his own words, and he quickly tried to think of what to say again. "I mean, I can see you better… How? How did you get them back? I'm not allowed to have them. They're gonna get mad at me." His expression turned to a frightened one, but, at the same time, it was easy to tell he was still grateful because of the way he looked around the room, seeing everything he couldn't see as well before.

Dwicky grinned slightly, resting his hands on his own lap as he finally settled himself to kneeling. "It's just for today, just for today, they won't mind." He raised a hand to carefully push the glasses higher up on the boy's nose with a finger, an idle, 'So don't worry,' to follow. With a pleased smile, he settled his hands back down in his lap. "I thought it would help you to see clearly, to actually see clearly. Better, right? I'm sure it's much easier on your eyes."

"I missed having them." Dib's voice was quiet as he spoke. He hadn't objected to having Dwicky push his glasses up for him; it was nice, since he couldn't do such a thing himself. "It was strange, at first, when they took them away. They were afraid I would cut myself with them. That was when I didn't have the jacket on all the time." He took to looking around the room once more, and a frown came over his face. "I got a lot of headaches. I tried to ignore them, but they never went away. After awhile, though, I slowly got used to not having them. I guess I pushed it all to the back of my head." He stopped looking around, just to meet Dwicky's eyes once more. "This place is ugly."

"Yeah," Dwicky met the boy's gaze once again, "it is; _very_ ugly. Not something you want to call home, I'm sure." He, uneasily, rubbed his own arms, warming the sudden chill that the dirty colors of the walls, floor and ceiling gave him. Unhealthy was another good word for it, but he didn't say that aloud. "But… we'll get you to look at other things in due time. If all continues to work out, you'll be able to go into the mess room, and, soon, day-time visits outside. Though, you'd need clearance from your dad for that." He gave an optimistic smile at that. "But I'm sure he'll be pleased with the progress. I'm sure he'll visit. Wouldn't you like that?"

Dib flinched at the mention of Membrane, and immediately looked down to the floor under them. "I don't know." His toes curled and uncurled under him as he tried to get his thoughts in order. "I've never had visitors. Dad and Gaz; they never visit. Gaz doesn't want to at all, I'm sure… and Dad..." He stopped, and quickly looked back up at Dwicky. His mouth opened and closed as he tried to speak, but nothing would come out. After a while, he quickly shook his head with a frustrated noise and looked back down. His voice turned cold and harsh, much like it had the day before, with the orderly. "He wouldn't want to visit; He'll never want to visit… He'll never let me out of here."

Dwicky followed Dib's gaze to the ground, at the curling of toes, before raising back up to the boy. "He's a busy man, what with the world to keep in order," he quietly surmised. "I'm sure he's just been busy with… scientist-like things. He's always on the television, on interviews, on the radio, commercials, talk shows." That wasn't a very good argument, Dwicky had to admit; what man goes about a full career and tacks on fatherhood on the bottom of the to-do list. Dwicky pressed his lips into a thoughtful line as he watched Dib fidget grumpily. "How about I talk to him?" the man finally interjected. "About… things," he gestured the vagueness of 'things' with a hand; mostly curious to see how Dib would take to the suggestion.

Dib's head quickly shot back up, to reveal wide eyes. "No..." With little, to no effort, he leaned forward just a bit closer to Dwicky as he kept speaking. "Don't do that; you can't do that. If you do then he'll take you away from me. He'll make you leave me." Both of them being on even ground, for the moment, allowed him to move his face near the other's invading more personal space. "Don't tell him anything. It's okay if he doesn't know, it's okay. Just don't leave me." He pulled away and huddled in on himself once more, but made sure to keep his eyes on Dwicky the entire time. "Please..."

Dwicky was taken aback. He hadn't expected exactly that reaction, something of the kin but not wholly what he just saw. It had him faltering a moment; he looked around before clearing his throat into a fist, and felt the back of his neck warm. The boy's interactive social skills needed work. "Dib," he gently shook his head, "no one is going to take me anywhere. Your dad wouldn't do a thing like that, he OK-ed me to be here, and, especially, if all he wants is for you to get well again too." He assuringly patted the boy's knee, since it was closer than his shoulder, and crowding the boy wasn't the best idea at the moment. "I'm sure your dad loves you very much… your sister too."

Dib's eyes immediately went to that one hand and stayed there, as he quietly spoke up once more. "I've never heard that word from either of them. It sounds so strange..." He lifted his eyes back up, just barely, so that he could stare at Dwicky once more. "If a father loves his kids, doesn't that mean he actually wants to spend time with them? He shouldn't just choose one day out of the whole year, right?" His voice lowered a bit more as he went on, becoming sadder with each sentence. "And, if a younger sister loves her brother, then she should look up to him. That doesn't mean she should find ways and reasons to beat him up, right?" His eyes bored into Dwicky's, hoping that the other would have all the answers.

The man had to pause at that. He didn't know either of Dib's immediate family very well, so he couldn't very well pass judgment. But that look Dib was giving him; it had his own brows furrowing. Dwicky gave a soft, thoughtful sound. "Maybe I should talk to both of them."

A frustrated, yet sad noise escaped Dib, while he quickly looked away towards the wall. He made sure to pull his knee back, so that touch was no longer possible between them. "They're going to tell you bad things. You won't like what you hear… you won't want to come back." Another choked sound came from the small body. "They always hated me; I was never right to them. I'm sorry. Sorry..."

Dwicky's brows rose, before they knitted, and he leaned a little closer. "I wouldn't say that. I'm sure they don't hate you." He went on carefully "What things do you think they would say about you? What things do you think they would say that would make me not come back?"

"Insane… something wrong with me. I'm an embarrassment that never should have seen the light of day. Everything about me is weird; I'm not normal… annoying." Dib finally turned his eyes back to Dwicky after each small word and phrase left his mouth. "They said those things about me. Sometimes they didn't know I could hear." He shook his head slowly, as he glanced around the room. "I'm not insane though, I know I'm not. They may think I'm an embarrassment, but I'm not insane..."

Dwicky sat back on his knees, his fingers knitting idly in his lap. "I don't think your insane, Dib." he affirmed. "I don't think you're insane at all; misguided, yes… Misunderstood, yes… Outcast, ignored, and mistreated… most likely. But I don't think you're insane." He smiled weakly for a brief moment after he spoke. "You're an energetic boy, but you just need to find a better outlet; a new hobby."

Dib's eyes fell on a small hole that had been forming in the fabric of the wall nearest him. For a few moments, he seemed much more interested in that than the conversation going on. Slowly, he turned his eyes back to Dwicky, with just barely a smile on his face, much like earlier. "I liked that. To finally have someone say I'm not insane." The smile slowly fell away as he looked back down at his feet. "It would be nice, though, if it was good enough to let me out of here. I guess, either way, it's okay though."

"In time," Dwicky nodded lightly, "In time." He shifted, so that he could sit down beside Dib, leaning against the ill-begotten padding, which served a better use, at the moment, than keeping patients from knocking their brain matter against the wall. Sure, the surroundings looked beyond questionable, but, he supposed, he might as well get used to it now, and scour in the shower about it later. With a pleased noise, he stretched out his legs; they were starting to cramp. "So then, is there anything you'd like to talk about?"

Dib watched Dwicky with careful eyes as the man sat next to him. It didn't take long for him to ease up and relax himself though. His whole body moved back against the wall, and his eyes fell away again, trusting the other, for the moment, at least. "I was scared when I first came in here. I mean, not this time… the very first time." His whole body shivered for a second; something even the jacket couldn't cover up. "This place is much scarier when you're just seven. They didn't give me anything then… I guess it's because I didn't bite, or scream."

Dwicky settled his gaze on the wall in front of him, dragging it from one side to the other, following each crease, seam and rip of each square of padding. He lightly frowned, feeling Dib's shivering in his bones. It was a sickly feeling, like cold, ghostly fingers in your gut. "I can imagine," he answered off-handedly. "This place would make anyone crazy, if they stayed here long enough." Dwicky gave a sharp blink; he shouldn't have said that aloud. He raised a hand to rub between his brows, forcing positive ideas inside his cranium, pushing the fatigue this place brought, out. He let his hand fall back to his lap, before speaking onward. "It's a scary place… but, at least, it can't get any worse." Dwicky paused, that didn't come out right.

Dib let out another incoherent noise at what Dwicky said. His eyes traveled over to the other beside him and stayed for a few seconds, before traveling to the metal door that kept him locked inside. "People used to make fun of me a lot, because I talked to myself. The truth..." He stopped for a second and swallowed, hard, before going on, "...the truth is I think the voices were always there. I needed someone to talk to, someone that would acknowledge me. If I talked to them, then everything would be okay." He finally allowed his eyes to move back to the side, just so he could look at Dwicky once more, his head tilting just a bit. "When I came in here, then the voices were the ones that started to make fun of me."

It was those words that had Dwicky looking back to Dib. "You've told the doctors about the voices?" Schizophrenia wasn't exactly under his jurisdiction; he was only here to counsel one; Dib. And for a brief, frightening moment, it occurred to Dwicky that he was biting off far more than he could chew. "… because it's important that you do. If the medication that they're giving you isn't working, they need to change it." Dwicky looked down to his feeta, 'clt'-ing the toes of the spats together, before parting them to 'clat' them again. "What do the voices say, Dib?" He carefully looked back to the boy once more. "Do you hear them now?"

Dib nodded his head, just a tiny bit, while his teeth just barely grazed at his bottom lip. "They hate you. They don't want me to listen to you; they're screaming at me right now… so much louder than before." His eyes moved to Dwicky's shoes, for the moment, interested in the movement they had made instead of the other's face, as he continued speaking. "They used to tell me how I failed. They told me that getting locked in here was my fault. If everyone died, then it would be on my head. They told me… that I had no chance of making anyone believe anymore." His eyes grew wide, and, slowly, he laid his chin down on his knees as best he could. "Now, they say different things; things about you… that you're just trying to hurt me. They're saying you're not good for me."

Dwicky spoke cautiously this time, "Did you ever consider what you hear is your own thoughts and doubts; your own worries, just… much bigger and louder? Maybe punishing you for not owning up to expectations; your family, or, perhaps, your own high standards? You have a history of being high strung, and having extreme stress, don't you?" He watched Dib watch his own shoes, and he followed the line of sight: down, and then back up. "Perhaps you've worried yourself into a hole, so to speak," it was hard to say if it was a question or a statement, but there was gentle coaxing to get the real issues out of the boy.

Dib quickly shook his head, before speaking up, once again, a bit more panicked. "No, that can't be right. I can hear them. If that was true, then I wouldn't be able to hear them so clearly." He soon lost interest in Dwicky's shoes and moved his eyes back to the door, as if expecting the doctors mentioned from before to come bursting in at any moment. "I can't tell anyone else; no one else can know. I don't want anymore medication. I hate it. I hate what they do to me here. I just want you to help me, like you said you would. I can deal with it."

A helpless sort of frown washed over Dwicky's lips, but he ironed it out by pressing his lips into a straight line. He wasn't a psychologist, had no say in medication, or what was healthy for the brain. The emotional state of health was his forte, and he was making a blanket, out of tattered odds and ends.

"I'll see what I can do," was all that Dwicky ended up saying, quietly, in the end. He'd have to tell Dib's doctors, and they, in turn, would mess with his medication. It would be a fun drug merry-go-round for the boy, much to Dwicky's disapproval. But there was no other way. Not that Dwicky let on these thoughts…

Dib dropped his eyes down, away from the door after the words were said. His own expression had turned a bit sad, as if he had expected something completely different. "They don't like when I scream in here. They try to stop me. I can't help it... I just want it all to end." He stayed completely silent, for a long time, and it seemed as if he was done speaking for the entire day.

It was a long while, though, before anything happened, and, this time, it was Dib that initiated touch. One of his feet slowly moved out, to rub just barely against Dwicky's shoes, his toes carefully moving along the other's feet, even through the worn out socks. "It's nice to see someone else. Someone that listens to what I say, without trying to quiet me. You'll help me get better, I know it. I won't believe what the voices tell me...I'll try."

Dwicky gave a start, and it was his turn to feel shy at the suddenness of touch, though he didn't move, nor shy away… he felt elated. He smiled lightly at their feet, watching with a half closed gaze… of all things to be feeling at such a place, he felt relaxed for the most part.

Dwicky gave a lazy, agreeable nod. "Ignore them. Just… tell yourself, 'It isn't real'. And if it goes on," he gave a quiet pause, clicking his tongue, "concentrate on one word, one thing; a pleasant thought, something nice, non-violent… And think about that word, every aspect, every detail. List off the good qualities, and why you like it, in your head; why it makes you happy. Keep doing it, until they fade away. Write the list down-" Dwicky blinked, looking back to Dib's tied back arms, only to give a sheepish, sort of apologetic grin, "or rather say them out loud to yourself. Concentrate on your words and thoughts, nothing else; the positive, not the negative, okay Dib?"

"It isn't real." Dib's whole body tensed up after the words were said, and even his toes stopped moving, for those few small moments. He slowly eased up, and turned his eyes back to Dwicky, his expression a bit pained. He didn't say anything; just stared, before letting his eyes fall back down, to their feet. Slowly, his own toes started moving once again, as he began to mumble, quietly, to himself. "Something that makes me happy… One thing… Something I like." His tongue moved out of his mouth as he continued to think, silently.

Only after a few moments, did he turn narrowed eyes back to Dwicky, a small noise coming from him, before he spoke up. "This is hard… What if I can't do it?" His toes, once more, stopped, in his worried state of mind.

Dwicky gave a coaxing nod of his head, keeping his head bowed. "You can; it's easy. It can be anything, no matter how minute. Like… bugs. You said you liked bugs. Think of the particular type of bug you like. Think about their shape, their size, how many legs… do they have feelers? What about their little chompy-pincher mouths? Then go on, to where they live," he tilted his head one way, "how they live," he tilted it another, "do they live in a colony, what do they eat… just keep going and going. Exactly like that." His eyes fell back to their feet, and Dib's, who stopped. He turned his own to lightly rub against the other's. "Don't think of anything else."

Dib's eyes immediately moved back, to their feet, at the small bit of contact made, but he didn't try at all to pull away. "I liked ladybugs. They're really small… so small that they could just crawl all over my fingers." A tiny smile came over his face at the thought, before he kept on. "There would be so many of them in my window, sometimes. I would keep it open, just hoping they would come in my room. Sometimes, if I pushed one forward, it would spread its wings. I always thought it was interesting how they were so well hidden." His eyes quickly darted back to Dwicky's face for just a split second, before looking down at the floor. "I like this."

Dwicky made a quiet, pleased sound, smoothing his shirt out, pulling all the wrinkles out "Good. Use it when you feel scattered, or alone, or you hear things." He found no success with his shirt, so he gave up and folded his hands on it, instead. "You can use people and situations, too. Just think about what you like, and list them. On and on, until you feel better. You can even close your eyes; picture it all in great detail inside your mind's eye." He fanned out his fingers in gesture.

Dib moved his toes around just a bit more, before letting them rest fully on Dwicky's shoe. "Those are going to be harder; people and situations. I can't really remember anything about either I've really liked." His eyes narrowed just a bit, and, once more, he bit at the straight jacket. He continued to stay silent, only making small muffled noises every few seconds.

"There was one thing," Dib's voice came out quiet, once he let go of the jacket. "That one time I was really happy and..." he took in a frightened breath, "...and it involved you." He finally moved his wide eyes back to Dwicky.

Dwicky felt himself blink slowly at Dib's toes. He hid his being unsure, the quickening of pulse and guilty curiosity behind a painted on smile as he turned his head, tilting it with the one word he spoke: "Oh?"

"The very first time I saw you. When you said you would be my partner, I was really happy. Someone believed me, and that's all I wanted." Another small sound escaped Dib, though he really didn't mean for it to. "It gave me hope that, maybe, things would actually look up. I thought that since one person believed me then maybe everyone else would start to. If I had that, then nothing could go wrong anymore." He let his eyes slip halfway closed, his voice becoming softer as he went on, "I like keeping onto that one thought. I hate thinking about everything after it. I hate it so much."

"It was a good moment." Dwicky nodded slowly and solemnly, taking his time with each nod of head. "It was." He sighed heavily, reliving the memory like a worn out piece of film; it had played out before his eyes too many times to count now. He went silent again. Silently his hand left his lap, and he didn't consciously notice, until it brushed against the strong, uncomfortable sleeve, that had sought Dib's hand under his elbow. "I'm sorry, Dib." Dwicky bowed his head heavily, down until his chin rested against his chest. He couldn't help turning his head away from Dib. "I regret leaving. I do."

Dib's eyes quickly shot open and darted towards Dwicky's hand for a quick second, before moving to the man's face. He wasn't able to see the other's expression because he was turned away, and it had a frustrated noise coming from Dib. "If you regret it, then why did you do it? Why didn't you think? I was happy! I was finally happy! You didn't really care! No one ever really cares!" He quickly pulled his foot back to his own body and huddled away from the touch on the jacket. "No one..."

Dwicky glanced back at his now lonely hand. He placed it down on the floor beside him, to hold his weight, as he turned to face Dib, then. A firm expression came across his somber one. "If I didn't really care, I wouldn't be here. If I didn't care I wouldn't be sitting here, talking to you. I wouldn't be here helping you." A look of hurt crossed the man's features and he reached out to the huddled form to grasp the boy's arm. But instead of tugging Dib near, it held the boy there as the man leaned nearer, so another hand could reach over and push up the glasses that had slid down Dib's nose. "I want to make it up to you." Dwicky found himself whispering, "I want to make you happy." His voice fell even quieter as his hold on the boy's arm loosened.

Dib tensed up at first from the few touches, his eyes squinting when his glasses were pushed back up. It was the whispered words which had him glancing back towards Dwicky and easing up. "I was scared. I didn't ever want to feel that kind of hurt again. I had never had any kind of hope before. It wasn't fair; the way it was taken away. I was scared that it could happen so easily again." His eyes fell down to look at the other's hand that was still on his own restrained arm. "I'm still scared, but I don't want to be scared."

The man's gaze shifted half closed, eventually falling to where Dib looked. "Dib..." Up, Dwicky's gaze flicked again, and he leaned closer, just wanting to be closer, knowing that he shouldn't. "I won't leave; I promise." His hand tightened just a little on Dib's arm, fearing the boy would shy away. "Okay?" his voice perked a little, despite still keeping hushed.

At first, it seemed as if Dib really would freak out and try his best to move away, but in the end he did the exact opposite, and relaxed as best he could. His head nodded just barely before he realized he needed to actually speak. "I know. You said so before. You even kept your promise when you said you would come back today. Seeing you again made me happy. I didn't think you would be back, but here you are." He raised his eyes, but it was easy to tell that it was hard for him to actually look at the other as he continued. "If I get better, if I get out of here, you won't stop, right? You won't let me be alone, right?"

Dwicky met the other's tentative gaze. He settled himself better in front of Dib, either of his hands moved, gently grasping the boy's arms just before the bend of elbow. He wasn't sure how to immediately answer like he wanted to, so instead, he distracted either of them by rubbing Dib's upper arms, although the shivers the boy had were long passed. "I won't let you be alone," Dwicky repeated. "I'll be here for as long as you need me." He opened his mouth to say more, but the words didn't sound right, so he closed his mouth and it seemed to settle on a promising thin smile.

Dib glanced down at the comforting hands on his arms and kept his gaze there for awhile. Slowly, his foot moved out once again to touch Dwicky's, much like it had before, his toes curling and uncurling, bit by bit. After a few moments he finally raised his head to look the other in the eyes, his own gaze no longer scared in that moment. "I'll get better; I promise I will. I'll do whatever you tell me to do. I miss the outside. I miss looking at the stars. If you're here to help me, then everything will be okay again. I'll be better soon. I can ignore all the voices… I really can."

Dwicky felt a more reassuring smile fall on his lips. He leaned forward a moment, pursing his lips to speak, just as a choir of deranged screams a few cell blocks down pierced the silence, the walls barely muffling the deranged sounds. It had him jerking with a start, his arms half around Dib instinctively, as if something horrific would lunge straight from the walls themselves. He paused a moment, and realized with slight surprise that it was the top of Dib's head he was looking down at, and not the boy's face anymore.

The smaller body under Dwicky had become completely rigid. There was no movement at all, except for small, quick breaths, and even those were hard to make out under the thick jacket. Surprisingly, there was no thrashing and no screaming. It was just dead silence for so long, until, finally, Dib actually shifted a bit so that his face moved just barely against the other's clothed chest, causing his glasses to move around. "Are you scared?"

It was Dwicky's turn to freeze up "N-no. No. No I'm not scared." He looked left, then right, diagonal one, diagonal two and up, then diagonal up. "Just, uh, startled. Yeah, startled is all." He looked back down at the mess of dark hair. He felt his neck warm over when he noted his hands had fallen at the boy's sides, near his lower back. "Startled." Dwicky quietly echoed himself. He swallowed thickly when he heard another set of moans from far off, talking of some sort, perhaps doctors to administer more 'quiet time' medicines. His hands rose up on Dib's sides idly, to his ribs. "This place is... freaky," he quietly spoke, as if anyone could hear him through the padded walls.

"Freaky is a good word for it." Dib made no move to even try to get up, though the feeling of hands near his sides had him relaxing a bit more. "I've tried to get used to it. It's not easy at all. It's still hard to believe that I'm not the only one in here. There are others like me, and I'm like them." He moved his head just a bit, so that he could glance sideways at the padded wall. "… something wrong with us all." He finally lifted his head and turned his eyes back to Dwicky so that they were face to face. "You don't have to worry though. You're here for me, so I'll be here for you."

The warmth on Dwicky's neck traveled down to his chest. For a moment, all the man could do was stare down at Dib a moment. He hadn't expected those words to come from the boy. "Y-yeah. Thanks." His eyes averted, but of course, he couldn't see anything in the room, save for himself and Dib. Collecting himself, he cleared his throat and leaned back from Dib and the personal bubble invasion.

A small frown formed on Dib's lips and, once Dwicky moved back, he immediately huddled in on himself once again. His eyes moved once again to the wall and stayed there, for the time being. "It may seem freaky, but at least you get to leave. I have to keep remembering everything you told me. I have to think about the good things while you aren't here." He took in a small, shaky breath before looking away from the wall and back to Dwicky with half closed eyes. "For some reason, they aren't as loud right now."

Dwicky managed to smile as he settled his hands on Dib's shoulders a brief moment "Good. That's good to hear." --or rather not hear. The sudden old miserable groan and whine of metal right across from them had Dwicky nearly falling back. He clasped a hand over his heart and gaped, wide-eyed, at the rather tired, unimpressed orderly glaring at them from the door.

Dib's own eyes moved towards the door and he slowly backed away from Dwicky, towards the wall, much like he had the day before. He shot a small glare the orderly's way, but this time didn't say anything otherwise. His attention returned fully to Dwicky instead. "You have to go now." It was stating the obvious, but in a tone that was much too sad.

"C'mon Mister Dwicky," the orderly grumbled. He had rounds that he wanted to get over and done.

Dwicky nodded and rose, brushing his pants off a moment and straightened his shirt. He turned to Dib, walking over. "I'll see you tomorrow. I'll keep these safe 'til then." Carefully, he plucked the boy's glasses from his face. He stood back up and smiled weakly. "Be good, okay?" Folding the glasses up, he tucked them in his breast pocket.

Dib let out a small noise when his glasses were taken. The sudden change from perfect, clear vision to distortion annoyed him and caused him to want his lenses back. He moved his head so that he could stare up at Dwicky and gave a small nod in response to the other, before speaking quietly, "I'll be good." He gazed at the other for a few more seconds before finally turning his eyes away, and trying his best to rest his chin on his knees.

Dwicky's footsteps could be heard, muffled, leaving to the door and out. A passing snide comment about Dib's progress was quickly cut off by the slam of metal and the sound 'snap' of locks tightly locking. Then there was nothing else… and somewhere, the two men disappeared beyond that thick door with everything else in that big, bright 'outside world'.


	3. Sessions 3

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Reaperofhate

Chapter 03 

The same ritual as the day before fell over The Crazy House. The doctors went about checking over patients, the nurses gave out all the shots and pills, and what few guards were there lazed around with no real care for their job. There was quiet small talk between a few nurses about the once loud child behind the large metal door. Worried whispers about how someone so loud shouldn't suddenly become so quiet… worries and rumors that were soon put to rest once a few doctors waved them off, and soon, no one in the building even cared.

At the moment, that certain quiet body known as Dib was laying in his cell. It would have seemed to anyone that he was in the same position he chose to be in each time the nurses, or even the doctor, chose to come in. If anyone even cared to come and look close enough, they would see the boy's eyes were tightly shut in anything but a peaceful sleep.

The same metal door that held the boy inside slid open, introducing the clockwork visitor with a rusty grunt. Dwicky walked, in all obvious cheer and good humor, into the cell, the wide smile almost shattering at the loud sound of the door shutting behind him.

Taking view of Dib's back to him, Dwicky strolled right up to the boy and was about to give a quite audible 'Good morning Dib!' when he caught sight of the boy's sleeping face. Quickly, he clapped a hand over his mouth before he got more than 'Goo--' out. He stayed like that a moment until he was sure Dib was still asleep. Quietly, he crouched by the boy's head, slipping the hand over his mouth, along with his other, under his chin to rest his head upon. There, he quietly watched the boy sleep; something he was sure the kid barely got enough as it was. His thin lips pressed together. Perhaps he should come a different time, and allow the boy to sleep.

Dib continued to lay there with his eyes shut tight. After a while, the silence in the small cell was broken by tiny whimpers coming from the boy's mouth. Noises that sounded broken and frightened. Small tremors rocked the small body beneath the straight jacket before ceasing completely in an instant, only to start once more.

Dwicky frowned lightly. Maybe he'd stay... He shifted to kneel in front of the boy, rubbing his own arms as he glanced around. It was cold, though not temperature-wise; an unnatural cold that seeped through clothes, chilling the soul. He slowly let a hand from his own arm to the boy's forehead, brushing away the stray dark hair that stuck to a warm forehead. Lightly, he rested the back of his hand against Dib's flush cheek. Dwicky's brows furrowed and he rubbed the side of his hand, trying to sooth the poor boy's sleep. He looked to the door with disappointment. Of course there were no blankets; can't have the kids hanging themselves in creative fashions.Dwicky looked back down at Dib, worrying on the pathetic little noises, wondering what the boy saw, where he couldn't be to help. So, tentatively, he rested a hand on Dib's arm, gently rubbing some warmth into it up to his shoulder.

The small little touches to his face had Dib's unconscious mind causing him to flinch, even in his sleep. A few mumbled words made their way from his mouth, but nothing coherent. It was the one simple touch on his arm that did it completely. His eyes that had been shut so tight suddenly sprang open, and a small gasp for air was let into his mouth. He sat up from his position against the wall, and began to struggle in the jacket, while trying to move as far back away from whatever had touched him. His eyes darted around the room every way they could, before suddenly landing on Dwicky. Even then, he didn't stop moving.

"I'm sorry!" Dwicky immediately raised his hands up, surrendering, probably more shocked than Dib. Warmth painted itself across his face (like a boy who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar), and he waved his hands, trying to get the boy to settle down. "Sorry, sorry, sorry… I'm sorry, Dib." He tried to smile in his defense, but it came out some horribly pathetic, guilty expression. "I should have just let you sleep. But-you-looked-cold-so-I-" He was beginning to run his sentences on too quickly. "I didn't mean to scare you… like- that. I'll come back later, if you want more sleep." His expression grew ever more apologetic and guilty. "Sorry."

The sudden words had Dib stopping his escape to the other side of the room. His struggling slowly ceased, bit by bit, until it stopped altogether. Instead of moving away as he had been, he started back towards Dwicky, only able to use his knees for support. Once he was inches from the other, he stared up at the man's face, making sure it was really him. It was easy to see from such closeness, that there were tears at the corner of Dib's own eyes, but they were blinked away as he continued to stare up at the other. After only a few seconds, he leaned down, breaking eye contact just so he could bury his face in the other's chest, much like what happened the other day. This time it wasn't an accident though. "I don't want to sleep. I didn't mean to sleep."

Dwicky opened his mouth, startled that the boy approached him, only to bury his face against his chest. It had him faltering, placing hands on the boy's shoulders unsurely. Then, slowly, he let his hands run down from shoulders across the straps and bound sleeves, only to cross arms to embrace the boy loosely. "Sleep is healthy." Dwicky spoke quietly, carefully, worried that any small thing would send the boy lunging away in fear. "Don't want sleep deprivation, now." He rested his chin atop the boy's head, holding the boy just a little closer, wishing that his own heart would stop thumping so quickly.

Dib did nothing, even as he was pulled closer. If anything, he buried his face even further against the fabric of Dwicky's shirt. "It's not healthy. My sleep isn't healthy; it's scary. All the images I see are scary. I have nightmares, but at the same time, everything seems so real. It's all going to happen." He moved his head just a bit, so that he could wipe his eyes on the other's shirt, not having the hands to do it himself. "I don't like seeing those things."

A hand softly rubbed Dib's back, trying to soothe the boy. "What sort of things do you dream about?" Dwicky quietly asked, not minding when the boy used his shirt as a tissue. "What did you dream about today? You can tell me; I'm here to listen."

"Blood." A small shudder came from Dib's body, even with the comforting hand on his back. "So much blood… Everyone was around me, dying. I couldn't stop it... I tried to move, but I couldn't stop it. My body wouldn't move. It was forcing me to watch." He pushed closer against Dwicky, even if it wasn't even possible. "People were burning. People were being ripped apart. I saw them. The monsters… The monsters from so long ago. They were all doing it. They were helping him. He was controlling them. He got them out somehow." A small choked sound came from him after he finished speaking.

Dwicky tightened his hold around the boy, his arms firmly around Dib. He leaned his cheek against the top of the boy's head and stayed like that a moment, rubbing Dib's back, warming the boy's shoulders before he finally spoke. "What monsters, Dib?" He rubbed the back of the boy's head, running fingers through the shaggy, unkempt hair. "Who was controlling them?" Dwicky had an inkling, but it was best to bring it out of Dib himself.

"The monsters in my head..." Dib shook his head just a bit against Dwicky's chest, and took a shuddering breath before going on. "They aren't like the voices. They aren't the voices at all, actually. They're something completely different. The monsters are from a different world, entirely. They're made up from my imagination. I thought they were gone but, in my dreams, in the nightmares, they're all out. They're out of my head and in the city." His voice grew quieter as he went on, as if he were afraid someone besides Dwicky would hear the conversation. "Zim knew about them. He saw them. In the dreams, he would find some way to control them; to bring them back so that they would do horrible things to everyone... everything that I couldn't stop."

Dwicky shut his eyes, nuzzling his cheek against the top of the boy's head to comfort Dib. "It's alright, Dib. It was just a dream. It was all just a dream. It isn't real, and no one is hurt. Zim is just a kid you know from skool, and he can't hurt anyone. He can't hurt you." He softly ran his hand at the base of Dib's head. "Just some freaky kid." he quietly repeated himself. "Just your imagination. It's alright now. Everything will be all alright now."

"It didn't feel like a dream. None of it felt like a dream." The words were distant only because the touches had Dib in a small trance. Where he had felt so tense and shaken up earlier, he now felt relaxed and calm. "I have the same dream all the time. The same thing always happens. I always see the monsters tearing at people's flesh, ripping out their insides. I can see them pushing other people into fires and hear their laughter. It hurts so much."

Dib's eyes slipped closed, but after a few seconds they snapped open once more, and a small shudder ran through his body. "Zim's always standing near me. He's always laughing because I can't do anything. He makes me watch. It has to be his fault that I can't move." There was silence for a few seconds after the words, until his voice was heard once, much smaller than before. "Is it really possible to have the same dream like that, more than once?"

Dwicky nodded gently against Dib's head. "Recurring dreams are normal. They happen when people are stressed," he wet his lips a moment, "or worried about something." When the mind is fixated solely on one thing to an obsessive-compulsive extremity, the subconscious can send wonky telegrams to the sleeping conscious mind; but he kept that to himself.

Silently, Dwicky settled on just holding the boy close, a little more than unsettled by Dib's words, yet morbidly fascinated. He let out a small exhale before speaking again. "A good way to control what you dream of is to think of exactly what you want to dream of. Exactly like we talked about yesterday; think of one word, a person, a thing, and list every detail in your mind that makes you feel safe and happy." Arms crossed at Dib's back, Dwicky's hands lightly clutched the fabric, keeping the boy close. "Just keep thinking it, until you feel relaxed," his voice petered on, "and finally fall asleep."

For a few long moments, Dib stayed silent, even after Dwicky stopped speaking. The only movements coming from his body were his own steady breaths under the thick straight jacket. Finally, he lifted his head, which disturbed Dwicky's own, but he did it just for the sake of meeting the other's eyes. "I feel relaxed right now. I didn't even have to think about anything. I just feel really calm. That's okay, right?"

Dwicky couldn't help the slight chuckle and the slight smile to match "Yes. Of course; it's perfectly okay."

Despite his earlier fears, Dib gave a small smile back, before burying his face back against Dwicky's shirt. He allowed his eyes to actually close, but refused to let his guard down at all. Instead, he continued to speak up quietly, still not ready to go to sleep again yet. "If you ask me questions, then that means I'm allowed to ask you questions too, right?"

Dwicky blinked. "Um… Sure. Go ahead." He looked from Dib back to the door, and the closed slot where the orderly would peek in and check on the patients. He went back to gently rubbing the boy's back, soothing him. "What would you like to know?"

Dib gave a small, quiet sound at the touch along his back. It had his body becoming even more relaxed, before he spoke up once more. "You said that none of it was real. I still don't know whether to believe it, but if it is true, then where did you really go? If there were no aliens, then who took you?" Even as serious as the questions were, he still kept completely calm, instead of becoming tense like usual.

"A couple of jokers; guys in suits. They had a good laugh...-and I-." Dwicky cleared his throat, resting his head back on Dib's, keeping the boy's head comfortably tucked under his chin. "After that, I, then, went to go stay with friends. Went sight seeing for a bit. I... guess I wanted to save face, so I didn't come back. But, seeing new things isn't all that great when you know you've left a mess behind." His hand drew up and gently rubbed Dib's shoulders. "Soo... -I came back."

"How did you know?" Dib's tone of voice changed just slightly, in that moment. It wasn't harsh or biting, but just a bit sad. "I haven't been to skool in a really long time. How did you know I was here? When you came back, what did you do? How did you know exactly how to find me?" It was obvious that he was more than curious, but he still refused to lift his head even a bit. He had found too much comfort in just laying against Dwicky, and wasn't about to move just to question the other. Speaking up was just fine for him.

"Hmm," Dwicky lightly hummed, the sound easily felt against his chest. "Heh. Interested in the whole story, are we? Well, first I went home and cleaned up the mess I left. Wait, that isn't so interesting, is it? Right. I went back to the skool and checked up on your file." A whole filing cabinet had been dedicated to the boy by then… And all the teachers gave glary, cat eyes at the mention of the boy's name; but that was a different story. As if that skool wasn't creepy enough. "And, like you said, found you hadn't been to skool in a long while. So I got your home address and took a visit. Your father", was a dismissive self absorbed jerk, "told me what happened. So, I offered to help… he said yes, and, here I am." He gave a light sigh. "And, that's the story, in a nice neat, simple, summary."

"You went to my house?" That perked Dib up, and had his eyes quickly opening. He lifted his head once more, so that he could look at Dwicky. He made no other move to pull away, staying completely settled against the other as he gazed at him. "Does it look the same?" Dib immediately looked away, as if ashamed he had even asked, and instead tried to think of something else to ask. "I mean, is everything like it was? The way I remember. The house was tall, and my room was the top window to the left. There was the garage, too; that's where I always worked on things." At this, he raised his eyes just a bit, back to Dwicky's face. "I just want to know."

Dwicky looked up for a thoughtful moment, before looking back down at Dib, giving an assured nod. "All of that was there: the tall, the garage, and it did have windows. Though, I only saw things briefly inside, when I talked to your dad." He ran a hand through the boy's ratty hair to smooth it all back in order, having mussed it up by leaning on it. "But I think I saw a few things hanging in that left window you mentioned. I'm sure nothing has changed." He gave a small, optimistic smile.

That thought had a small smile forming on Dib's own lips as well, but it slowly fell when new thoughts formed in his head. He let his head fall back down, wanting that same comfort from before, as he spoke up the frightening thoughts. "Dad wants you to help me get better, but I'm still scared of him knowing everything. What if you tell him, and he says I've gotten worse? Then, I'll have to stay here longer." His eyes slipped halfway closed and his voice grew quiet. "He'll keep telling them I'm insane. I'll be in here forever…"

Dwicky looked down at Dib, his hand resuming the rubbing of the boy's back. "He has no reason to say that. What makes you think that he would?" He glanced at the buckles that the sleeves linked firmly on thick, durable belts. His hand kept nicking against it, and, in the end, he slipped his hand under to comfortingly rub the boy's lower back.

Dib tensed up for only a few seconds, only to relax once more. "He tells everyone I'm insane. 'His poor insane son.' Even before I was in here, when it was only every now and then, he said it all the time. His co-workers; all they knew me as was his insane child." The hand on his back had his eyes finally slipping closed, and a small, satisfied noise coming from his lips instead of the usual scared ones. "I've been telling you things I shouldn't be telling anyone. If he hears about them, he may not let me out."

"He's your dad, I have to tell him. If you want to get out, I have to talk to him at some point. He is the one that O.K.s your release." Dwicky rested his head back atop Dib's, once more. It wasn't right; the way Dib's father treated him, nor spoke about him. Many things harbored to Dib's breakdown, and it seemed like his father was at the very top of the list. In the end, he'd need to talk to the man about it… sometime. "But, anyway, did you try what we talked about yesterday, Dib?"

Dib nodded his head just a bit, before speaking up. "Yes, I did. You told me to think of one thing to try and make them go away, and I did." He shifted a bit against the other and tried to bury his face closer, against the fabric of the shirt, his voice suddenly coming out muffled when he continued. "At first, they got louder, but they slowly started to quiet down. They were still there, but not as bad."

Dwicky turned his head to nod against Dib's slightly. "That's good. That's really good." His hand drew back up, to rub against the boy's shoulder blades, softer this time. "What did you think about?"

That one question kept Dib quiet for a long time. At times, the slow steady breaths that came from him would quicken, in his nervous state of mind. "Yesterday..." His voice finally came to him, scared and quiet. "...before you left. What you're doing now. When you grabbed onto me... when it happened yesterday, they stopped screaming so loud. I wanted them to keep quiet, so I thought about it again, and it helped." He opened his eyes just barely and tried to move closer, afraid that, at any moment, Dwicky would let go. It was impossible, though, since he was as close as he could get. "They aren't screaming right now. Please don't let go. I'm sorry."

Dwicky hesitated a moment, his hand slowing, before it stopped, perching on Dib's shoulder blade. He swallowed gently, staring at the wall across from him, mauling over something in his mind. Then, just as suddenly, he fully wrapped his arms around Dib, keeping the boy tight, against his chest. He bowed down enough so he placed his cheek against the boy's head, resting his chin against Dib's. Dwicky hugged Dib tightly, as if it were him locked away in that cell, and not Dib. "Don't be sorry, Dib," he quietly murmured. Resting his lips against Dib's shoulder, his words became slightly muffled. "You have no reason to be sorry."

Dib let out a quiet sound at the sudden treatment, and slowly began to relax once again. His eyes traveled to the side, so that he could glance at Dwicky as best he could. "I thought you would be mad." He no longer sounded frightened, the calm tone back in his voice. "I didn't think it would be okay. You pushed me away, yesterday. I thought if I told you, then you would be upset." He looked away, back to the man's chest. "I thought if I did this, you would be upset. I need them to be quiet though."

Dwicky made a soft, questioning sound as he blinked his eyes open. "I didn't push you away." His eyes sifted half shut. "And I'm not mad, or upset." He exhaled heavily against the heavy fabric on the boy's shoulder. "I don't mind this." He turned his head to bury his face in the boy's shoulder. "Not at all." His words were muffled.

"I'm glad." Dib let out a small sigh that ruffled the fabric of Dwicky's shirt. "I wish I could stay like this all the time. Then, maybe they would leave me alone completely. I guess when you leave, I just have to keep thinking about it. They'll stay quiet, I hope." His eyes moved to the side once more, to try and get a look at the other's face, but it was hard, since Dwicky had his face buried in the jacket. "Do you think..." He started to hesitate with his words, not being able to look at the other causing him to become timid. "...that maybe you can do this each time? Just so they'll stay quiet?" His words suddenly became rushed. "You don't have to, I just wanted to see; just because it helps."

Dwicky had to raise his head, to catch Dib's face and expression at such a question; he really wasn't expecting that one. He didn't mean to pause for so long, but in the end, he managed a weak smile and a slight nod. "Sure." He settled a hand on the boy's head, to assuage Dib's worries. "Sure, we can do that." Dwicky felt his pulse quicken happily. "If it helps."

The long pause had Dib's whole body shivering. When words had been said, and they were exactly what he wanted to hear, he couldn't stop the smile that formed on his face. It wasn't one of the tiny, shy smiles he usually gave Dwicky; instead it was a normal smile, just for that moment. He buried his cheek against the fabric of the shirt while keeping eye contact with the other, not wanting to break it at all just yet. "I'm glad you came back. I was upset at first. I was really hurt and angry, but now none of that matters. I feel better when you come to visit me."

Dwicky shared the rare smile, smiling wider, still, after Dib spoke. "Me too, Dib." He could definitely agree, with an assured tone, to that. "Me too." And somewhere in Dwicky, he felt the tight knot of guilt slowly untwine itself in his stomach. "Things will be okay now," he voiced aloud. For the both of them. Things couldn't go wrong now; everything was becoming as it should have. It had Dwicky chuckling away his own stress as he smoothed Dib's hair back again. "Everything will get better each day, you'll see."

The touch to his hair had Dib finally closing his eyes in response. He was still afraid of the visions from earlier, all of which he could remember so clearly, but he still tried to push each horrible image aside, while pushing closer and closer to Dwicky, almost ending up in the man's lap. He didn't really notice what he was doing, and didn't really seem to care. "I know it will. I trust you much more than I did before." The calm tone in his voice died just a bit as he went on. "You think they would be there again? If I actually wanted to sleep, do you think everything I saw would be there again? What you told me to do, would it really work?"

"Sure." Dwicky shifted, moving so he could lean his back against the wall, taking Dib with him in the process. He comfortably stretched out his legs with a satisfied sound, allowing Dib to rest between them, as the boy stayed pillowed on his chest. When all was settled, his arms still kept around Dib, he continued on speaking "It may take some practice, but it should work." A hand ran up from Dib's back, to the back of his head, softly stroking the dark hair there. "You can try it now. I don't mind if you fall asleep on me." Dwicky leaned his head against the wall, though still looked down at the boy. "Go ahead; you look like you could use the rest anyway."

Dib's eyes had snapped open in a worried gaze as Dwicky started to move around. Once the other was settled, and he was still comfortably lying against the man's chest, his eyes slipped halfway closed and settled on the wall nearest to them. "Think of what I want to dream about. Think of that." The words had come out as a quiet mantra to himself in the large room. He shifted a bit in the jacket before settling once more, and letting his eyes slip shut. It took a long while before his breathing actually evened out from its erratic state, and, even then, he would still give out tiny noises here and there, once he had fully drifted off.

Dwicky's hand continued to pet along Dib's unkempt hair, frowning with displeasure at just how dirty it was. The boy needed proper care; better care. Though, he hoped that, with the boy's new-found cooperation, the hospital would move Dib to a better room and tend to him much better. He made a note to suggest it to the doctors when he left today.

For the moment, Dwicky stayed as he was, his hand falling to rub the boy's back before knitting together with his other hand to rest around Dib. He listened to the slow, even breaths the boy gave against the stiff, chewed up collar of his straightjacket, and, as sporadic as it came, it was lulling. And somewhere, he found his own eyes closing as he relaxed with the small warm figure pressed against him. He hadn't expected an asylum, of all places, to be so at ease. But all the same, Dwicky allowed himself to doze until Dib woke up or, less desirably, the orderly told him visiting was over.

The peaceful sleep that had come over Dib didn't take long to leave him, and for the nightmare from before to grab hold of him once again. This time though, the small noises he made were much louder. His body shook and twisted beneath the jacket he wore as he tried his best to free himself. It was all of that struggling and one last small frustrated sound that allowed him to finally sit up as best he could and look around. His eyes were wide and tearful, but worse than the last time and, once he was done looking around the room, they settled on the body below him. A sudden fearful expression came over his face, the emotion seeping into his voice. "Dwicky..."

The man could only stare back, wide-eyed back at the boy. His small hope that the boy would have a long and peaceful sleep died away in his chest with a small sound. "Y-yeah. It's me. Just me: Mister Dwicky." His thick brows furrowed, though he tried to give an understanding expression. "I haven't gone anywhere. It's okay. It's just a bad dream." Dwicky faltered a moment before he reached out to place hands on the boy's upper arms. "Just a small bad dream." He tried to rub comfort back into Dib's arms. "Everything is fine." Dwicky softly went on, "Nothing has changed since you closed your eyes."

Dib started just a bit at the hands on his arms. The only thing keeping him from moving away was the sound of Dwicky's voice. "Alive." He moved forward so he could bury his face once more into the fabric of the other's shirt, wiping his tears away at the same time. "You're alive. You're okay. It was different this time. It was so much different. You were there… You weren't supposed to be there." He took a small shuddering breath before going on, his voice still frightened. "I don't want to go back to sleep. They'll do it again. I don't want to just stand there."

Dwicky accepted the boy warmly in his arms, holding him tight and firmly to assure the boy things were quite alright, and he was quite alive. He stared a moment at the floor, just holding the boy, soothing him. When Dib's shaking subsided a little, he finally spoke, "What did you dream this time, Dib? What happened?"

Dib kept his eyes wide open the entire time, refusing to close them and see the images that had just woken him up. "Everything was okay. I did what you told me to do. I felt okay, for awhile." He pressed closer once more, wiping his eyes on Dwicky's shirt before going on. "Then it all changed. The monsters came back and they took you. It was the same as before, except this time they had you. Everything was the same, but this time it was worse. I tried even harder to move, but I just couldn't. I was so scared. They wouldn't stop. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…" His body shivered once more under the jacket, but only a small noise was heard from him after that.

Dwicky made a sort of soft noise deep in his throat. He held Dib tighter, resting his cheek against the top of the boy's head, and rubbed the boy's back, trying to warm the continuous shivers from the small shaking form he held. "It's alright. I'm here, it was just a dream. You have to remember that it's all just a dream." Dwicky leaned from the wall and began to subtly rock the boy. "It isn't real. I'm still here; I haven't left since you fell asleep. I've been right here with you. You have to remember it's just a dream," he softly echoed.

"Just a dream. All a dream." Dib began to mumble the words quietly to himself until they became too incoherent to understand. After a while, the shivers slowly stopped as he let out a shaky breath. "It's too hard. Making the voices go away has been at least a little easy. The dreams… for some reason it just doesn't seem like they'll leave." He blinked his eyes a few times, trying to get the excess wetness to go away where wiping them wouldn't help. "I never had dreams like them before I came here. I used to have dreams about catching aliens and being famous. Once I came here, that's when all the scary dreams happened. I didn't think this place would hurt me so much. I've been here so many times before..."

Dwicky frowned greatly inside; that wasn't something that you wanted to hear from a once healthy fourteen-year-old. Dib had great aspirations and potential, and now, here he was in a dirty padded room being terrorized by bad dreams. It hurt, it really did.

"I'll..." Dwicky slowly started, taking it on himself to try and come up with a solution to Dib's every problem; he was going to be there a while, "talk to the doctors about giving you something to sleep. Just an average sleeping pill with some water should do for now." A drug induced sleep wasn't the healthiest of sleeps, but it meant no dreams; though it was just another pill to add to the already stacking pile the boy was taking. Dwicky turned his head to rest his lips against Dib's hair, still gently rocking the boy. How Dib still functioned despite was beyond him.

"I don't like pills." Dib said the statement as if he were a stubborn two-year-old. "I already take a lot of them. Well, really only five, but to me it's a lot." He bit at his lip for a few seconds, afraid to go on and tell everything, but in the end trust won out, and he told anyway. "The nurse; I don't like her very much. She comes in and gives me the pills. She told me what they were for one time. Two are for my nerves, one for the voices, one to make the visions go away, and the last one is just to keep me from screaming so much." He shifted a bit in the jacket because of his nervousness. "I don't take the one for the screaming or the voices. I don't take the one for the visions either, because Zim isn't a vision. He's there. Everything is there. I learned how to pretend and act like a good boy for her."

That had Dwicky almost physically sinking, but instead, he just tightened his arms and leaned against the wall. "Dib..." Where to start… how to get the boy to understand? "Dib, you have to take everything the nurse gives you." He idly began to rub the boy's back again, running it up and down between the boy's shoulder blades. "You want the voices to go away? You need to take the medicine too. It might also help the dreams to stop too. The pills give you a certain chemical your body needs." His hand drew up and rested on Dib's shoulder "There's no reason not to take your medicine. Zim isn't a reason. He's just a weird, creepy kid." Dwicky couldn't help but let his gaze idly shift about the room. "So... Where do you put all the untaken pills?"

Dib's whole body seemed to tense up at Dwicky's words before actually slumping. For a few moments, he refused to answer at all until he finally spoke up, his voice sounding just a bit broken. "There's a place in the wall that is torn up. It's at the bottom, and there's just a really tiny hole. After the nurse leaves, I spit the pills in there. I've been doing it for a long time." His voice fell a bit more. "You're going to tell aren't you? You're going to make sure they watch me…"

"It's important that you take it all, Dib. It's very important if you want to get better and leave." Dwicky let his anxious gaze follow along the walls to find the obvious tear, but there were so many little holes, it was hard to pinpoint just one, though his eyes fell upon a particular sagging bit of padding near the floor. He could only guess that it was years of pills that weighed the plush fabric down.

Dwicky glanced down at the head against his chest. With a slightly shaking hand, he tilted the boy's head up, just enough to gain Dib's attention and meet the other's eyes. "I want you to take them all, alright? Do it for me, please. You'll see that it'll help make what you hear go away faster."

Dib didn't resist when his head was lifted, but it was obvious he was more than a little upset. For a few seconds, all he did was stare Dwicky in the eyes before finally looking away towards the wall. "They're trying to change me. All those pills do is change me. I don't want to take them. I told you because I trust you." He let his eyes slip closed for a few seconds before quickly opening them, just so he could look into Dwicky's own eyes once again. "You want me to take them. You're trying to make me change too." A sudden sad look came over his face. "I don't want to change. I want to get better, but I don't want to change. I still want to be me."

A rather unhappy look passed over Dwicky's face "I'm not trying to change you." he murmured, running the few fingers that were against Dib's chin across his jaw to rest on the boy's shoulder. "I want you to be you, too. And the you I knew wasn't hurting like this." Gently, Dwicky sighed as he smiled rather sadly. "Now, why do you say these pills change you? If, by change, you mean calms you down and makes those things you hear go away, that's a good thing." He hoped, against anything. He just wanted something to go right for the boy.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky's face, even as the other's hand moved back to his shoulder. He stayed like that for a bit longer, not saying anything before finally settling back down as he had been, with his head against the man's chest. "When I first took them, the voices did go away. I was fine with that. I really didn't mind it at all. When the pills wore off though, they came back and got louder. They yelled at me. They were mad. I didn't want to hear them scream at me, so I stopped taking them. If they stopped yelling at me, then I didn't mind dealing with the taunting." His voice became a bit hesitant as he went on. "The other pills, the ones for the visions. The ones for what they don't think are normal. They made me forget everything I thought was real, and I don't want to forget. It's all I know. If I forget… then what do I have?" He lifted his head up once more so he could look at the other. "The ones for the screaming... I haven't screamed at all since you've been coming to see me, so I shouldn't have to take those anymore, right?"

Dwicky made a soft indecisive noise. "I'm not a pharmacist; I don't know how the pills work. But... take them all from now on. I'll talk to the doctors about re-evaluating your pills. You'll have to cooperate with a check up of some sort so they can give you something proper. Less... potent doses of…" Dwicky tripped over his words a moment at "medicines." Slowly he shook his head, only to lean it back against the wall. "You need to continuously take the pills for the voices if you want them to stay away. I'm doing all I can to make them leave, but there's only so much I can do." He paused a moment, watching the ceiling before glancing back down to Dib "What do the 'visions pills' make you forget exactly, Dib?"

Dib let his eyes fall back down, looking to where his head had been buried just seconds before. "It's as if something was telling me that everything outside of this room wasn't real. That everything I believed was never real at all. When I took them, I felt so miserable. I had to keep remembering why I was put in this place to begin with. When they wore off, it all came back to me; every thought of wanting to get out of here, and I remembered never wanting to forget it all again." He bowed his head, and instead of pushing closer to Dwicky, he moved back a bit despite the other's hands. "It was like all of my memories were gone."

"Have you talked to the doctors about the side affects?" Dwicky touched Dib's jaw to get the boy to look up to him. "It's important that you do so that if something doesn't work right they can change it." He leaned down to rest his forehead atop the boy's head. "They're just trying to make you better," he quietly spoke.

"I don't think they like me here." Even when Dwicky had raised his head, Dib still tried his best to avert his eyes. "Everything they do is to stop me from being so loud. The man that comes to tell you to leave; he really doesn't like me." For a few seconds, he bit at his bottom lip before going on, his eyes rising just a tiny bit. "I think it's because I bit him while he was trying to cut my hair. He wasn't doing it right though, it wasn't the way it usually was… and besides..." He let his eyes fall back down, "...he cut me. He wasn't careful at all. So, see, I don't like talking to them. I don't like speaking to them at all. I just want to stay away from them."

Hands lightly grasped Dib's arms and slowly rubbed them. Dwicky didn't move, he just quietly spoke, "I'll take care of everything, don't worry."

Dib raised his eyes at the words, the sad and hesitant look slowly disappearing from his face. "Really?" His voice was still quiet when he asked the question and, slowly, a small tiny smile came over his face. "You'll really make things better, just like now." The words were more of a sure statement to himself instead of a question to Dwicky. The small bit of space he had pulled away was slowly closed back up as he pushed closer once again and laid back down. "I know I'll get better, I have to. As long as I get to see you all the time, I'll be okay." His voice lowered a bit while his eyes slipped just slightly closed. "As long as no one takes you away."

Dib could feel the smile on his hair. The man raised his head, but, before he could say anything, he heard the bitter irony of heavy, shuffling footsteps and the muffled _bleep _ of code being pressed, which had his jaw clacking closed. Dwicky felt his cheeks grow hot; the scene at hand would defiantly raise eyebrows. So he softly ran fingers against the back of the boy's head before settling his hands on the boy's shoulders, gently coaxing the boy to lean back.

The slam of the door sliding opening had Dwicky jumping and rigid, as his eyes bulged wide; this place made him so incredibly nervous.

Dib gave a small protest at being pushed back, the touches not doing anything to help. His eyes held obvious disappointment, but it was the door which had them snapping open. He turned around as best he could to look towards the exit of the cell and, before he could even look at whoever had dared to open the metal door, he already turned his head back around. His body shook just barely, and quickly he struggled out of Dwicky's hold on his shoulders, just so he could escape to the wall next to the man and keep his eyes pinned on the opening Every few seconds, his eyes darted to the side at the one beside him.

"You know the drill, Dwicky." The orderly eyed the two occupants of the cell, before smacking his lips with some sort of distaste of the sight.

Dwicky sat a moment, frozen a second to watch where Dib had moved to settle. "Everything will be okay," he spoke as he rose with a grunt, not bothering to fix his shirt. He stood, but for some reason, a smile just wouldn't press on his thin lips. "I'll see you tomorrow, Dib. Just remember what we talked about." Dwicky moved towards the door, though his gaze kept on the boy as he went.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky as the man got up and headed towards the door. He refused to look away wanting to keep that contact the entire time, and when the other spoke up it had him nodding his head just a bit. "I will." His eyes darted towards the orderly and he huddled in on himself just that much more at such a hard gaze, compared to what he had just been receiving. He let his eyes move back to Dwicky just before the man left, and when he spoke the next time, his voice could almost barely be heard in the room. "I'll miss you."

Then the door slammed, immediately cutting off Dwicky, before any sentiments could be returned. Be damned if the orderly was going to sit through a sappy moment.

The barrage of cold metal had taken the place of Dwicky's image, and left Dib alone.

Dwicky poked the metal on his side, cringing at the cold and unpleasant, rusted sort of texture. He was given an impatient grunt as the orderly headed down the hall of other doors with suffocated wails behind them. Dwicky glanced back at the door with a frown, giving a wave that would never be seen, known, or felt. "You too, kiddo." He then turned, his steps uneasy and quick, following the orderly out into the bright, sane world.


	4. Sessions 4

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** The-Empress

Chapter 04 

It was another day and once again the staff in the insane asylum known as the Crazy House for Boys refused to put on much of a happy face for anyone. They were used to the normal routines and knew that it was what they were going to be doing for, more than likely, the rest of their lives.  
There was one small difference on this day though, one small thing that turned out to be not so routine. Earlier in the day the metal door on the lower level had not been opened to show a visitor or an orderly. Not even the usual nurse. Instead, the door had been opened by a guard and one doctor. The two that didn't normally come to visit the occupant of the cell had dragged the small body along hallways and stairs just to bring him to a new door; a door that wasn't encased in metal although there was still that horrible keypad.

At the moment the door was closed and locked tight, the boy looked at the small barred window that was in the middle of the door, the only thing that allowed Dib to see anything. He let his eyes travel away from the sight and suddenly the memory of being transferred from his old room to something new came; something much larger, but still just as scary. He had refused to move from the middle of the room the entire time he had been placed inside. Even the large, but flat bed in the corner couldn't tempt him to sit down.

It was later on, near the afternoon, that the punch of code introduced another visit to Dib's new humble abode. The still heavily enforced door slid open with a less intimidating sound. Though this time it was Dib's usual visitor that walked in, a brand new cheery smile plastered on his face; the living embodiment of good humor.

The door shut behind Dwicky as he walked in, hands in his pockets. This time they allowed him to wear his tie; it was his funeral if the patient got out of hand and strung him up. It was another black rumpled tie that hung from the man's collar; in fact it was probably The tie. But Dwicky couldn't tell, most to all his ties were black, (and most to all his shirts were white office shirts); life was easier when it was simple.

"Good afternoon, Dib. How are you liking your nice new room?" Dwicky grinned practically from ear to ear.

Dib's scared eyes immediately moved towards his new visitor and his mood quickly perked up in that one moment. He left the middle of the room that he had still refused to move from the entire time just so he could walk towards Dwicky. The task was made easier than usual for him just for the fact the floor was no longer padded and was now hard tile. Once he was just a few inches from the other he stopped and darted his eyes around once again. "It's scary. I don't really like it. They didn't tell me anything. They just threw me in here. I don't understand what's going on." He quickly moved his eyes back to Dwicky, a scared expression on his own face. "And the nurse. She stayed with me this time. She watched me and kept opening my mouth to make sure I swallowed everything."

Dwicky's bright smile didn't dim one bit. He gestured a hand to all four corners in a grand sweep; everything was much cleaner, the room a sterile white as apposed to the psychotic beige of the other room (beige was an easier colour to clean and hide all the dirty stains bodily fluids made).  
"This is your new room you'll be staying in. Since your improvement, you've been moved to a nicer level. It's bigger." Dwicky perked at that. He then placed a hand on Dib's shoulder to point and direct him to the new and only piece of 'furniture' graced in the room. "And you now have a bed to sleep on instead of the floor." Dwicky grinned righteously. "How about a tour?" Keeping his hand on the boy's shoulder, he gently guided him from wall to wall. "Here we have a wall, another wall, another, a door. See, there's a window now." He pointed. "A nice exotic view. Another wall and the bed I was talking about." Dwicky cleared his throat and stood behind Dib with either hand on his shoulders. "Go ahead, try it out. Have a seat. Get comfy."

Dib allowed himself to be moved around the room, though he didn't see what was so special about everything. It all kept him closed in from what he really wanted to see and for that he still hated it. When they stopped in front of the bed all he could do was stare at it for a few moments. He turned his head around so that he could look up at Dwicky with a hesitant gaze, before looking back at the bed and finally moving forward. He turned around just so he could sit down with his back facing the wall. The bed gave a small groan, but didn't shift much under what weight he had. He kicked his feet for a few seconds before raising his eyes to meet the other's once more, the uneasy expression slowly melting away from his face. "It's alright."

Dwicky made a pleased noise at Dib's approval, despite how begrudging it was. "Glad you think so." He lightly clapped his hands together, grinning teeth down at the boy. "So! How are you today? How are you feeling? Hm? Hm?" the man's thick brows rose with each perky 'hm'.

Dib bit at his bottom lip for a few seconds at the questions that he was asked. His eyes darted towards the walls as he started to stutter trying to answer. In the end nothing really coherent came out. A small frustrated noise ended it all and he quickly moved his eyes back to Dwicky. His expression turned sad and he moved back on the bed a bit more. "You said it was okay yesterday if you kept doing it. I won't answer unless you do what you did yesterday. Unless you make sure they stay away."

Dwicky paused a moment, tilting his head a moment to blink unsurely at what Dib was getting at. He raised his brows, wrinkling his forehead. "Hm? Yesterday?" He tilted his head the other way before he straightened with an 'Oh!'. The man gave a sheepish sort of grin and nodded "Yea. Sure."

Dwicky pointlessly smoothed his shirt down, straightening his tie to no real avail; it only went crooked again. He moved to sit carefully down beside Dib, giving a slight surprised sound when the bed creaked at him under his weight. Clearing his throat again, failing at keeping the warmth spreading to his cheeks, Dwicky raised his arms a little awkwardly but paused half way. "Here, Dib, turn around a quick moment." He twirled a finger for the boy to do so.

Dib had watched Dwicky with careful eyes and gave a small noise when the bed creaked. His eyes went wide for just a second and he glanced down at the mattress as if it would bite him, but it was Dwicky's voice which had him turning his attention back to the man. He blinked curiously at the other before realizing what he was being told to do and carefully he turned around, his feet dragging up onto the bed with the motion.

Dwicky scooted closer and Dib could feel the man fiddling at something on the back. "This is just for today, like the glasses before, okay Dib? So that means no flailing, or swinging your arms. The sleeves are long, and- Ow!" Dwicky paused a moment to rub his pinched finger before he went on. " -And you have to promise you'll be good and let me do it back up when I have to go, alright?" There was soft clicking, belts loosening, and Dib could feel the constraining sleeves grow more and more slack. But Dwicky's motions stopped as he waited for the boy's reply, and confirmation.

Dib started to squirm once he felt the sleeves start to loosen up. It was hard for him to sit still once he realized what was going on and he had to remember that Dwicky had spoken to him, which meant he had to answer. "I promise." It was easy to tell by the tone of his voice that he was happy to finally be at least partly free. "I'll be good."

"Good. But you have to hold still a moment, Dib." Dwicky continued to labor over the thick belts that held the sleeves together. The boy had worn the belts out stiff, making them hard to work with. In a few good minutes Dwicky let out a noise of accomplishment as he undid the last belt, and pulled the sleeves from each other. "There!" With a sleeve end in each hand, he pulled the jacket's sleeves forward to Dib's front, uncrossing the boy's arms finally free but at the same time it crossed his own arms over the boy's chest. And he kept them like that pulling the boy's back against his own chest in that promised embrace Dib wanted. "Done deal." Dwicky grinned.

Dib had kept completely still once told to, his small bit of squirming ceasing for the moment. It was when arms were crossed in front of him, along with his own, that he let out a noise that was everything happy. Before he could even try to turn his head around to look at Dwicky, he was pulled back against the man and it didn't even have him tensing up like it would have many times before. Instead, he easily relaxed and stared down at the extra arms that were around him. The long sleeves refused to allow his hands to be shown, but that didn't stop him from lifting one arm carefully to place it over one of Dwicky's own. His feet, which had stretched out in front of him, curled and uncurled inside the socks he still wore. "I like this bed more now."

Dwicky rested his head atop Dib's comfortably. "Yea," he agreed with a smile "it's a nice bed." The man watched Dib's happy moment, having his arms back after who knows how long. It had Dwicky's smile widening. He tugged the boy a little closer, finding now that Dib's sleeves were undone he was just that much more hug worthy. "Quite cozy once you get comfy." Dwicky paused and gave a slight nervous chuckle "The bed, I mean."

Dwicky watched the sleeve on his arm, somewhere buried in the long fabric was Dib's hand. He let his own slip over and settle where Dib's would be, feeling through the thick cloth the hand that lay under it. Dib's hand felt so small, so thin under his own. Dwicky let his fingers curl around under the smaller one that lay under his hand. "So, are you ready to answer now?" he asked quietly against Dib's hair.

Dib's eyes had followed Dwicky's hand the entire time not once tensing up, even when his own hand was taken. His fingers twitched lightly out of reflex before relaxing and he let out a small breath as his gaze traveled towards the wall. At the words he nodded his head just a bit. "I'm feeling better. It was hard for me when you left yesterday because they suddenly got louder, but I made them go away just like you said." A small frown came over his face and his eyes dropped back down to his arms. "I still didn't sleep though. I was still afraid to. The nurse that came in today, she said she's going to give me something before they turn the lights out. I'm scared to take it though."

"Take it. It'll help you sleep, without the dreams, I'm sure. And you need to sleep. Sleep is necessary for you to function." Dwicky looked down at the long sleeves, wondering if he could roll back the fabric and find a hole at the end for Dib's hand to poke through or if it was sewn shut. His eyes followed down the sleeve to the end to see that indeed there were holed ends. "So, how's the medication? How is that making you feel? You seem rather coherent."

"Some of it was different this time." Dib sounded a bit unsure when he began to speak. Still confused over the whole idea of what had happened with the medication. "There weren't as many either. The pill I took for all the screaming, that was gone and one of the pills I took for my nerves was gone as well." He shifted a bit, but didn't dare try to bother the hold Dwicky had on him. He only moved enough so that he could turn his head to the side and rest his cheek against the other's chest. "The pill for what they think are visions was different. I took it and I haven't really forgotten anything. She said it just helps me keep a better hold on reality."

Dwicky kept Dib's head comfortably tucked under his chin. "I talked to your doctors after I left yesterday. Straightened everything out like I said I would." He took Dib's hand he held and with his other hand he began to roll the tedious task of rolling up the long sleeve. "I talked to them about your progress and the medication you were taking; most of it wasn't needed. And your room, like I said. No screaming from other rooms, it's nice and clean, and... did I mention the bed?" Dwicky gave a pleased sort of noise as he finally saw smaller fingers pointing out of the sleeve. Gently, he tugged the sleeve back to reveal the small pale hand. Dwicky cupped Dib's hand between his own, curling his own around it slightly. He'd forgotten what he was saying, looking at the hand which hadn't seen daylight probably as long as Dib. His barely brushed over the boy's knuckles.

Dib's eyes widened at the sight of his own hand. His head had lifted just slightly, so he could get a look at what now seemed so foreign to him. Feeling Dwicky's hand wrap around his own had the noise he had kept in suddenly leaving him. He continued to stare for a few more moments until he finally allowed his fingers to move down and clasp around the other's as he spoke quietly. "You did it for me? You made them do all this for me?" A tiny smile came over his face and he tried to move back even closer to Dwicky. "It is a nice room. I'm starting to like it."

"Good to hear." Dwicky softly ran his thumb against the back of Dib's hand, letting his other arm return around the boy's front keeping him closely held. "I told you I'd get it done." Dwicky grinned again, even if Dib couldn't see it. It had taken many good solid hours of talking to doctors and staff, who just didn't want to be bothered with someone as wild as Dib had become known to be. But a few days of quiet and no biting seemed enough to sweet talk the doctors into listening. It had become obnoxious to keep reminding them that it was Professor Membrane's son they were dealing with; they seemed to keep forgetting that. "So, how are you feeling now, Dib?"

Dib narrowed his eyes as he thought over the question, his tongue slowly moving out of his mouth. A small habit he had formed over the years when he concentrated hard enough. "Now..." His voice started out quiet once more. "...I feel much better than I did before. Especially right now. Right now this place doesn't seem scary at all." He moved his head, disturbing Dwicky for the moment just so he could move his head back as best he could against the man's chest until his forehead almost rested on the fabric of the shirt. His view was upside down for the most part "This is nice. I wanna feel like this all the time."

Dwicky looked down to tilted back head looking up at him. It had him chuckling, it was rather cute. He found himself just looking down at Dib, smiling a little though not saying anything just yet. He bowed his head a little lower, his expression softening as both of his hands encased Dib's, gently rubbing it to keep the small hand warm since it hadn't left the sleeve in a long while. "Yea. It is nice."

Dib blinked his eyes at the sudden closeness in that small moment, but it was the feeling of warmth moving through his hand that had him relaxing once again. His expression turned a bit curious as he continued to stare at Dwicky from that same position, not once trying to move away. "You like it too?"

"Mm. Yea." Dwicky smiled, trying to chuckle but he could only manage to swallow thickly. "Yea, I've always liked it." He let his gaze shift, knowing just how incriminating that sounded. His eyes fell on the door and the barred window. He stared at it a moment before looking back down at Dib, eyes widening a little as he swallowed again. "Being around you, that is. You made my once dead end life exciting. Now you give me a reason to get up in the morning." Dwicky's throat danced again and the cheesy words did have him chuckling.

The words had the rare smile forming on Dib's face. "Really?" His hand shifted just slightly in the other's hold before he went on. "At first you know, I was scared telling you so many things would make you leave again, but I'm really glad you're still here. I really wish you didn't have to leave all the time. I know you'll come back but sometimes..." His eyes darted away from Dwicky's face before he actually went on. "...sometimes I wish you could just stay here. That they didn't make you go away."

Dwicky dipped his head down and while Dib's eyes were adverted, lips softly pressed on the boy's brow. The man rested his lips there a moment before he rose his head, bowing it lower to rest his nose ridge there with a soft sound. He held a bit tighter to Dib's hands, fingers fiddling with it. "I wish I could stay with you too." Dwicky quietly spoke trying to keep his voice steady.

Dib's eyes immediately shot back to Dwicky at the sudden gesture. It wasn't that he was frightened; he didn't even feel the need to panic much like he had with other touches. It just felt strange. For so long, all he could do was stare at the man above him until coherent words could finally find their way out of his mouth, if a bit nervous. "If they listened to you before then they would have to listen to you again, right? Maybe they would let you. At least just for one day, right?"

That had Dwicky immediately lifting his head back up. He blinked down at the boy, and then really thought about it. He tilted his head one way and looked away a moment to run it through his mind. "Maybe." Dwicky looked the other way. "Possibly." He looked up. "They might. Just to make sure you're settled. I supposed." He looked back down to Dib. "But if they're giving you something to sleep at lights out, there's no reason for me to stay."

The answer he was given wasn't at all what Dib wanted to hear and it had a small pathetic sound coming from him as he continued to look up at Dwicky. "No, it's okay. Even if they give me something you should stay because that means I may be able to sleep even better, right?" His face fell even more while his eyes moved away from the other's face and back to the side. "I just..." He hesitated for a few seconds. "I don't want you to leave. I don't want to be alone again."

Dwicky's lips quirked, pressing together. It was hard to resist the pleas of something so pathetic and small with furrowed brows over big brown pleading eyes; he was finding such a weakness for it.

"Well..." Dwicky started, turning his head to look back at the door and the window that gave a vague view of more hallway. "I suppose night observation would do some good. Considering the nightmares you've been having." He turned his head again to look back down at Dib with a slight smile. "You might rest easier knowing someone's there."

Dib's gaze immediately moved back to Dwicky after the words were said. "So you'll do it?" He was finding it hard to stop squirming in that moment, his fingers even twitching a bit in the other's grip. "I'm sure I'll be much better if you do. If you stay I'm sure all the scary things will go away." He tried to keep still, though the excitement was still clear in his voice. "You'll protect me from everything, right?"

"Y-yea. And yea." Dwicky gave a nervous sort of laugh. "Yes, I'll protect you. Though, it's important to face your fears, not to run from them." He looked back over to the door again. He'd have to let go of Dib, walk to the door, get the hired help's attention to get out and walk aaall the way to find a doctor to talk. The man narrowed his eyes at the door; such evilness in all that effort. Dwicky tightened his hold around Dib selfishly, still holding the boy's hand in one of his own. "I'll go in a moment."

Dib easily moved closer at the tighter hold on his body. He finally let his head drop back down so that he could look at their hands instead of an upside down view of the man. "I don't want you to go right now anyway." The arm that was still buried deep in the other sleeve lifted just barely so that it could clutch tightly to Dwicky's own that was around him as best it could through the strong fabric. "It's so silent. It's never been this silent before."

"All your doubts are gone. Confidence, esteem, they get stronger when you have someone to support you." Dwicky quietly explained, watching Dib's hand take his own. "How do you feel about yourself?" He leaned down so he could glance to the boy's face, then back at Dib's arms. "Better?" Dwicky thoughtfully wetted his lips. "What about your self image? How do you see yourself? Your opinion on Dib? How is he doing?" his voice fell gentler, considering the delicate topic.

Dib narrowed his eyes as he tried to think over the questions. "Myself..." The word left his mouth a bit distant and after he quickly shook his head. "I don't really know. I think I feel better. I mean, I think I'm getting better. Usually I feel so scared, but lately I've just felt so calm and that's a good thing I think." His eyes darted to the side so he could look at Dwicky, but just as quickly fell back down. "I'm don't want to stop believing what I've always believed though. That's what everyone wants and what I need to get better, but I don't want to let go. No one understands..."

"I do." Dwicky slipped his arms from around Dib to scoop up the small thin boy (barely weighed a thing, the kid was a stick figure), so that he could skooch back to sit more comfortably on the bed, leaning against the wall, Dib gathered more comfortably on his lap. He kept his arms securely around the boy. "I know exactly what you're talking about. And," Dwicky leaned down, taking Dib's chin to turn the boy's head to look at him "there's a time to give up childish games, and move on."

Dib allowed Dwicky to pull him back, making no protest except for a small noise. He shifted around a bit once he was settled again and went back to clinging to the other as best he could. As soon as his head was turned his eyes immediately stared into Dwicky's and he didn't break the contact for a second even when the other stopped speaking. "It wasn't childish." He sounded hurt for a moment, but tried to cover it up even though the pout was clearly on his face. "I was helping everyone. I still want to try and help everyone."

The man closed his eyes and shook his head; Dwicky obviously stood firmly by what he said, and he meant it. There was no latter.

Dib continued to stare at the other for a few more seconds until finally his eyes narrowed and he stubbornly turned his head back around, out of Dwicky's grasp. His hand that was being held pulled back quickly and his other arm drew up close to his chest. He didn't pull away other wise, but sat there quietly refusing to speak anymore on the subject. His free hand pulled at the long sleeve on his other arm just to keep it busy.

"There's better, more real ways to help people, Dib." Dwicky tried not to frown, but the disappointment was rather plain on his face. "Like," he counted them off on now free fingers "… community service, police force, firemen, social services, um.. gardening?" He paused at his pinky and frowned a little more. Dwicky leaned back against the wall, resting his arms back loosely around Dib. "I know you'll find and do something amazing." he added, still trying to be optimistic.

Dib shook his head at each job Dwicky said, his hand slowly falling down to finally rest on his arm. "No, I don't want to do any of that." The words sounded so sad compared to earlier; His sudden good mood was gone. "I wanted to be famous for what I liked doing. That's what's supposed to happen. I want to be amazing because I find things that other people could never find." His voice lowered a bit more and his head dropped some. "No one wants me to though. They keep me away from it."

"That's because it's all fake, Dib. All of it. Ghosts, zombies, werewolves, vampires, good government, aliens, pirates- it's all just made up fairy tales. Silly things to keep kids entertained, to convince them to eat vegetables and buy silly commercial products like soap on a stick." Dwicky lightly shrugged. "I'm sure there's other things you could discover for people.. like- other new common colds, new pandemics, some kind of new tooth paste, or a new flavour of pie. _Real _ useful things for people." He reached up to loosely take the type of the long scythe lock of hair atop Dib's head and gave it a playful sort of tug. "The false belief of aliens won't help anyone, Dib. Certainly the idea of one won't save any lives, or help anyone…" Dwicky's voice fell softer, more serious, more attune to the situation at hand "…get better from anything."

Dib gave a weak noise at the tug to his hair, but didn't try to move his head away. The words Dwicky said hurt him worse than the actual present situation he was in. "Stop it." His hand moved up to rub at tired and sad eyes. "Stop saying those things. Please." He stopped speaking just to take in a small shuddering breathing while his hand fell back down to his chest so fingers could curl up. "You said listening meant you believe me, but you don't. You're telling me not to believe anymore. Just like everyone else. Stop it."

Dwicky let go of the boy's hair. "I said I believe _in _ you, Dib. I believe _in _ you. Meaning I have faith in who you are and what you can do, and accomplish." He slid his arms back around Dib to tug him back against his chest, running soothing apologetic fingers through the boy's dark hair. He continued to pet the boy's hair a moment before continuing on to speak quietly. "I'll listen to anything you have to say. Nothing you say will make me ever leave you. But at the same time, you have to listen to me, and trust what I say." His adam's apple danced with a unheard swallow. "I wouldn't lie to you, Dib." he murmured against Dib's hair.

The soothing touches had Dib slowly relaxing once again. He stayed silent for a bit longer, though refusing to speak, still a bit upset. His eyes moved to the side, towards the door, looking outside the small barred up window for a few seconds. The sight of nothing but a dimly lit hallway had him quickly looking back down and immediately cuddling back against Dwicky despite his worries. When he finally started speaking again his voice was still a bit sad, but it was easy to tell he had calmed down somewhat. "I really have to stop? If I want to leave I really have to stop thinking about everything I've thought was real? I even have to forget everything I thought was true about Zim?"

Funny how subtle, and small and seemingly insignificant just a few questions could be something as grand and delicate as a threshold for change can be. Dwicky would have smiled at such revelations from the boy, but something tugged on his insides, causing his throat to ache and feel collapsed.

"Y-yea." Dwicky cleared his throat, trying to clear the shaky sound inside his voice. "Yes, it's time to stop playing, and time to move on. It's time to forget silly make believe things like the boogiemen, aliens, and time to put this frightening place all behind you." He ran his hand against the side of Dib's head, drawing his thumb along the boy's ear. "I know you can do it." he softly spoke.

Slowly, Dib started to nod his head, just barely disturbing the hand that was pressed against the side of it. "I guess that means I have to. If I really want to get out of here then I guess I really do have to stop believing." His hand slowly clenched weakly. "It's so much to forget though. If I forget every bit of it won't I feel empty? There won't be anything for me to hold onto." He moved his head back, much like before, so that he could look Dwicky in the eyes again. "I have to find things that will interest me again. Things that will fill up all that emptiness I feel, right?"

Dwicky nodded slow and sagely, wishing he was more definite with the movement; now wasn't the time for doubt. "I'll make sure you don't feel empty." His hand slid from the side of Dib's head to run against the boy's jaw to gently cup and keep Dib's gaze on him. "I'll make sure that Dib stays Dib." He softly, barely thumbed the soft skin just under the boy's jaw, on his neck, the skin that was usually hidden by the stiff, chewed up high collar of the jacket. Dwicky's other arm drew Dib closer against his chest, cuddling closer. "I'll keep a hold on you."

The touches on his face had Dib slowly closing his eyes halfway, his gaze becoming distant for a few seconds. He gave a quiet noise when he was pulled closer and blinked his eyes when the hand moved near the collar of the jacket. "Promise?" His eyes fell a bit more. "Even if I really do forget every single little thing you'll keep helping me? You'll still be here? You'll never let go of me?"

"I promise." Dwicky bowed his head closer down, his voice falling hushed. "I promise to do all of those things.." a finger drew across Dib's cheek to the corner of the boy's lips ", and more." he meaningfully murmured as his finger brushed against Dib's bottom lip before falling down to his chin. "I'll keep you close." his gaze on Dib sifted shut, growing softer, more genuine.

Dib bit lightly at his lip after it was touched, his eyes blinking once again only to fall back just as they were. Slowly, his hand that was still resting on his chest began to rise up. Every few seconds it stopped and closed before finally lifting up all the way just to stop behind Dwicky's head. Much like the man had done to him his own fingers toyed with the other's hair in a comforting gesture. For a moment his eyes darted away to the wall before quickly moving back to Dwicky's face, his voice just slightly nervous, but at the same time happy. "Thank you..."

Dwicky's eyes widened some, and for a moment his breath stilled as did he. His neck warmed, prickling down from where Dib touched his hair. Something sank in Dwicky where another thing fluttered back up. His hands moved from Dib's chin to brush back a few horribly stray strands of hair from the boy's face. Fingers ran through the dark tussled hair, trying to smooth it back with careful motions before it fell back down to just barely touch the boy's cheek. There Dwicky more firmly cupped Dib's cheek. "I can't believe I'm doing this." he spoke hushed under his breath to himself before he dipped his head lower, touching his lips to Dib's in a shaky kiss.

Each small touch finally had Dib's eyes closing. The complete calm feeling from earlier, before the disappointment, was coming back once again. It was the press of lips against his own which had his whole body tensing up and eyes snapping back open. His hand that was still buried in Dwicky's hair fell away to land on the man's shoulder as his body continued to stay completely still otherwise. His mind was a blank as to what was happening, but he couldn't pull away. All he could do was sit there and let it happen, his eyes blinking lazily as they kept on the other's face the entire time.

Dwicky's eyes opened at the thud of Dib's hand on his shoulder and the obvious fact the boy staying perfectly still. It was seeing Dib's eyes staring point blank at him that had Dwicky leaning back, uncertainty plainly printed on his face. He brushed a thumb along the boy's jaw, though said nothing, baited.

Dib didn't try to pull away from the touch and instead his eyes darted around Dwicky's face when the man pulled back. For a long time he stayed silent, no real expression on his own face the entire time. His fingers lightly curled and uncurled, while still resting on the other's shoulder, and when he finally did speak up his voice was oddly quiet. "Why did you do that?"

Dwicky opened his mouth before closing it a moment. He couldn't glance away, even if he wanted to, though he hoped no orderly decided now of all times to peek in and check on them; though Dwicky didn't hear anyone in the halls. He lifted his other hand placing it on Dib's other cheek, softly petting the skin with a thumb. "I care." Dwicky started, swallowing thickly, nervously, as he leaned down again, tilting Dib's head up just a little more. "I want to take care of you."

Dib's eyes moved to the side so that he could just barely glance at the new hand on his cheek. Just as quickly his eyes moved back when his head was tilted, but he didn't dare move away. Staying completely still much like last time. "I know you care. It's why you're here. It's why you say you'll never leave me. It's why I'm able to trust you." His wide eyes fell halfway once more and he let out a small nervous breath. "I want you to take care of me."

Dwicky finally smiled, small and weak, but a gentle smile all the same. He relaxed a little, the ease audible in his voice "I will." He leaned down just that much more, ghosting warm breath near the boy's lips. "I'll make everything better." He kissed Dib's cheek ever so softly, letting his lips linger there. "I promise." he whispered against skin before turning his head to brush his lips against Dib's again.

Dib tensed up once again, but just as quickly his body relaxed. He was hesitant for a few seconds, but finally he responded to the soft kiss, the action a bit clumsy on his end as three years alone in a cell left no room for much experience. His eyes easily slipped closed though and his hand raised back up to toy with Dwicky's hair much like it had before the shock had taken over him.

Dwicky smiled a little against Dib's lips, a slight chuckle in his throat at the inexperienced press back, if only because it was cute. He drew his head down to softly kiss the boy's bottom lip. One hand fell away to gently run down Dib's back, then back up, rubbing soothingly a moment like he had before. Dwicky broke the kiss, a soft sound of lips parting, only to press it again softer still, near the corner of Dib's lips.

Dib let out a small disappointed noise when the kiss was broken, his hand going just a bit slack. His sudden fear of being pushed away came back more than ever in that moment, but when Dwicky gave another kiss just to the corner of his mouth it had all his fears leaving. His eyes opened just a tiny bit, so that he could look at the other's face having a strange obsession with keeping such contact no matter what. As much as he tried to hold it in, he couldn't keep the small pleased noise from escaping him, and he didn't feel the need to keep it held anymore anyway, the small rare smile tugging at his lips beneath Dwicky's afterwards.

Dwicky couldn't help his own smile, feeling Dib's. He parted their lips a moment, but kept his head still near, enjoying the closeness and keeping it too for Dib's sake. He pet the boy's cheek with his thumb. "It's good to see you smile." It was wonderful to _feel _ Dib's smile. Dwicky's free arm slunk back around Dib's waist, keeping that promised embrace around the boy, fingers idly playing with the bottom hem of the straitjacket.

That small sentence had the smile on Dib's face growing a bit more. "I'm happy." Even if those hadn't been the words he said, it was obvious in his voice that it's how he felt. "I haven't felt happy in a long time. I like feeling like this again." His hand continued to run through the hair on the back of Dwicky's neck for a few more moments back finally fall to rest behind the man's head. "I like it a lot."

Dwicky grinned a little "I'm glad." He leaned his forehead on Dib's a moment, giving a content sigh that lightly warmed the boy's face. His other hand kept busy softly brushing slow arches across Dib's cheek. Dwicky moved his head so they were nose to nose. "Happiness looks good on you."

Dib blinked his eyes a few times and scrunched his nose a bit, still getting used to such touches and closeness. His fingers idly fidgeted with the back of Dwicky's collar while he let his eyes stare into the man's own. "You like this too, right? You're happy too?" His eyes quickly darted away to the wall, making it easy to tell he was starting to become nervous again. "You're not just doing it because you have to, because you have to help me get better, right?"

Dwicky made a soft sort of noise at Dib's worry. He placed either hand back on the boy's cheeks so that he had the boy's attention fully up at him as he leaned back to speak. "I came back for you. Just for you." he spoke firmly, though quietly as he kept the boy's gaze. His own eyes sifted half shut and he smiled just a little. "That's all that matters." Dwicky finished, brushing either of Dib's cheeks with fingers before he leaned down again to kiss the boy tenderly at first, breaking it to kiss a little harder.

Before Dib could speak at all he felt those same lips from before on his own again, but this time he didn't tense up. He easily fell into it, still a bit clumsy though. The sudden harder kiss took him by surprise and had him blinking his eyes a few times before they closed and he pressed his lips back. His hand slowly moved down from the back of Dwicky's collar to grab onto his tie instead, holding onto the rumpled piece of fabric lightly between his fingers.

Dwicky's hands slide down from Dib's cheeks to slip under the boy's jacket collar to brush softly fingers on his neck before settling on his shoulders. He continued the kiss a moment, breaking it only to softly bruise their lips together again. Dwicky knew he should have stopped a moment, given the boy a chance to catch his breath, find his mind. This had to definitely be all too much, too fast for Dib, especially considering everything piled up in the last few years; the neglect, and schizoaffective mind. Dwicky then kicked himself and common sense, for now of all times to be rearing its ugly head.

Small muffled sounds came from Dib's lips which only grew louder when the kiss was broken. His hand gripped Dwicky's tie tighter and he let out a soft whine that went unheard only because his lips were taken again. He couldn't help but move closer to the man as he tried his best to respond to the kiss. His arm that was still hidden by the sleeve rose up carefully to grip at one of the man's arms that were near his neck, holding onto it and keeping it near him as if he were afraid Dwicky may disappear.

And there went Dwicky's resolve, easily snatched away by Dib's clingy hands and needy sounds; he didn't need to think right _now _ anyway. His free hand slid down to grasp lightly at Dib's hip, tugging the boy nearer on his lap.

Dwicky broke the kiss again, purposely missing Dib's eager lips only to mark the corner of the boy's lips. He kissed a little lower, lips falling to Dib's chin. He softly kissed a little bit of everywhere save for the boy's lips, teasing him a little. Dwicky pulled back a little, grinning some and knowing it was horrible but he was just being a little playful; Lord knew Dib could use a little bit of that.

Dib's small whines grew with each teasing kiss. At times he tried to move his own lips to catch Dwicky's but was never successful. Although he wanted the contact again, Dib couldn't help the small bit of squirming he did and soon a shy quiet laugh was coming from him. "Stop it..." Even after the words were said, it was more than clear that was the last thing he wanted Dwicky to do. His buried hand gripped tighter to the other's arm, trying to pull the man as close as he could while his free hand continued to grip the black tie.

Dwicky grinned a little wider; how could he argue with that? He let Dib pull him near, either of his arms giving up to embrace tightly around the small body. He let the grip on his tie tug his head down so he could finally hit the well wanted mark, kissing the boy's lips with a chuckle, then slow affection.

Dib gave a small pleased noise that was muffled behind the kiss. Once again, his eyes closed just barely so he could enjoy the feeling. In that moment it would have been hard to tell he had once been so frightened and scared of everything around him; ready to jump and run away at just the simplest touch. Suddenly he wanted to keep every touch Dwicky was giving him all to himself.  
It was Dib that pulled away from the kiss after just a few quick seconds, just so he could smile up at Dwicky. He easily turned his body around the rest of the way while letting go of the other. When he was completely facing the man, he laid down across his chest and wrapped his own arms around Dwicky's waist in a tight embrace, completely content.

Dwicky let out a happy sound, having Dib actually return the embrace now. He leaned his head down a moment to place a quick kiss to the top of the boy's head; Dib needed a bath, he smelt like old leather, crazies and sweat. Dwicky settled back to lean against the padded wall again, comfortable with Dib cozily against him. He closed his eyes a moment, breathing slow and deep, lethargic from the elation.

Then it occurred to him. He'd completely forgotten.Dwicky's eyes snapped open and realized he had no watch to glance down to on his wrist. It had to almost be an hour now, and he was going to ask--_something_. Dwicky stared dumbfounded at the wall. What was it again? Something important, he was pretty sure. But he'd gotten distracted; the kissing had made him suddenly stupid.

Dwicky stared a good few minutes more. "I was going to ask... something." he finally voiced dazed, sheepish that'd he'd forgotten, sheepish because he'd forgotten exactly what; though he found the excuse why pretty good.

Dib had closed his eyes as soon as he was better settled, but it was the words that had them opening again. All he cared for at the moment was clinging to the body he was near, so what Dwicky said only made him a bit confused and had him holding on tighter to the man. He buried his face further into the fabric of the other's shirt causing his voice to be slightly muffled. "Ask later..."

A few fingers drew through Dib's hair, petting down to the back of the boy's head before settling on top. Dwicky had to admit Dib had a good argument there. But his gaze traveled to the cell's door, through the bars. "If I don't ask now, they'll come and I'll have to go." He went quiet, straining his ears to see if he could hear any far foot falls far off. Of course considering where they were, he heard more than just foot steps, so he gave that up, and glanced down to Dib, running fingers at the edge of the boy's hairline. "You wanted me to stay. I really should ask now." he quietly spoke, not wanting to move at all himself.

Dib clung tighter to the other body for a few more seconds before finally letting go. He pulled back away from Dwicky's hands just so he could scoot back barely, if at all. His arms fell down to rest in his own lap while his eyes looked off to the side at the bed they were on. "Fine." He glanced back to Dwicky out the corner of his eyes, a nervous expression on his face. "You think they'll let you stay?"

Dwicky watched Dib a moment before offering a slight smile the boy's way. "I'll try my damnedest." He stayed quiet a moment, raising a hand to nudge Dib's chin up with just a touch of finger. "And if not there's always tomorrow." he added optimistically, leaning down to brush a lingering kiss on the boy's lips. Then Dwicky suddenly stopped, blinking his eyes open "Oh wait, tomorrow's Saturday."

Dib easily lifted his head smiling a bit at the words and accepting the kiss. When the man stopped it had Dib blinking his eyes and giving the other a curious gaze, the statement causing him to tilt his head just a bit as he tried to figure out why the day made a difference. "What's wrong with tomorrow being Saturday? You could still stay tomorrow, right?" A worried tone came over his voice as he went on. "You'll still be here, right?"

Dwicky leaned back a bit, trying not to frown, trying not to sound disappointed. "I don't work on the weekends."

Dib's eyes went wide for a second as he slowly realized what that meant. He would be alone for two days with no one to help him; no one to hold him and calm him down. It would be just like before. The thoughts had his eyes falling to his hands which were still in his lap and his head bowing low. "Oh..."

"But I'm still here for now. And hopefully I'll be here until tomorrow." Dwicky brushed his knuckles against Dib's jaw, taking his chin again to lift the boy's head back up so he'd look back up at him. "I still need to talk to your father. Tell him how far you've come in just a short while. And maybe you'll see your father on Monday instead. I'm sure you miss your home, your family."

Dib still refused to meet Dwicky's eyes even as his chin was taken. He let out a defeated noise while his hands fidgeted as best they could in his lap. "You said you wouldn't leave. I don't want you to go away. I don't want to see my dad, I want to see you. It's not fair." He finally pulled his face away out of the other's grip just so he could move his head back down. "You're not supposed to let me be alone..."

Dwicky's hand lowered, and so did his gaze. He then quietly took Dib's other long sleeve and begun to pull and roll the material back like he had done the other one, though this time his action was done with more care. Once he had the boy's revealed hand in both of his, he ran his thumbs along Dib's palm. "The hospital has my number. I'm just a phone call away." Dwicky finally drew his gaze back up to Dib's face. "It's just two days."

Dib didn't try to pull away as the sleeve was rolled back, his eyes the only thing to move as he watched Dwicky take his hand. "Two days..." The disappointment was still clear in his voice even with just those two words. "I don't care. It's still too long." His eyes quickly widened and his head shot up so he could gaze at Dwicky's face. "What if they come back? What if I hear them again? You make them stay away. They'll come back while you're gone. What if I can't make them stay away?"

Dwicky's hands squeezed Dib's, closing either of his around the boy's smaller hand. "They won't, because you'll remember the things I've taught you. You'll be strong. You've done a lot on your own in the past. So I know you can do this." He kept looking at other before he slipped his fingers between Dib's, holding the boy's hand though keeping his other atop it. "I believe in you."

Dib squeezed Dwicky's hand back as hard as he could at the words. For a few moments, he just sat there completely still until he leaned forward once more and clung to Dwicky again. He buried his face in the man's neck instead of his chest and let out a small pathetic whine before speaking. "You have to come back. If they don't let you stay. You have to promise you'll come back." His hand gripped the back of the other's shirt tightly as if trying to keep the other from ever going away. "Promise..."

Dwicky was taken aback by the desperate clinging body at his front. He loosely rested his arms around Dib, rubbing his back softly to sooth the poor boy. "Come back?" he quietly questioned, not exactly sure what the boy meant.

Dib nodded his head against Dwicky's neck, the man's question causing him to cling just that much tighter. "After the two days you have to come back. I want to see you again. I'll miss you. I need you here. If you leave me forever then there will be no one with me just like before." He finally lifted his head just so he could stare Dwicky in the eyes once more. "I like how you make me feel. I like being happy instead of scared all the time. I can't feel that way anymore if you're gone..."

Dwicky gently smiled at the boy, touching Dib's cheek at first before brushing the many rogue strands from the boy's forehead. "Of course. I promise. I'll be here on Monday, sleet, snow, rain, sun, tornado or hale; it doesn't matter, I'll be here. Alright?" His hands fell down to Dib's hips, one rubbing the small off his back softly. "I told you, I'm not going anywhere. I'll still be in town. Just a phone call away."

The look of worry slowly fell from Dib's face at Dwicky's words and soon the small smile from before showed up once again. Certain that the man was telling the truth and he wasn't going to go anywhere, Dib slowly pulled away once again while keeping the contact Dwicky had made on his hips. He kept his eyes on the other's face through the silence for a bit before he finally leaned up just to press his lips against Dwicky's in a soft and nervous kiss, wanting to be the one to take the action first as well as just feel it again.

Dwicky's surprise lasted seconds before he pressed back, raising a hand to the back of Dib's head to press it just that much more. Softly, he continued it, slow against the boy's lips to kiss the nervous worry away. He made a soft disgruntled noise as he broke it, not wanting to at all. "I'll be right back, okay?" Dwicky stole another brief kiss in the meantime; which only lead to another while he had the time.

Dib gave a tiny whine when the kiss was broken, but it was quieted with what Dwicky said and the fact his lips were taken once more. He easily gave into the new kiss, closing his eyes to only small slits. He knew he had to pull away. If he wanted Dwicky to stay he had to stop and let the man try and talk to the doctors. It was hard though; each touch made it so tough to let go. He slowly gave in after just a few seconds and broke away leaning back to blink his eyes up at the other. His hands fell down to finally rest back in his lap.

Of course the rather adorable poise Dib took, sitting back on his lap like some lonely, unloved, kicked puppy, looking up at him with big tired brown eyes, didn't help Dwicky's reserve. The man made a defeated sound and hung his head; this wasn't exactly fair. Why did it have to be Friday?

_Why?_

Why was he doing what he was doing ON a Friday?

Dwicky gently helped Dib off his lap, trying not to look at the boy else he be sucked into wasting more precious time before he'd really have to leave. "Right back. Alright?" He nodded, slipping his legs off the edge of the bed. "As quick as I can." He realized he needed to retract his hands from Dib to stand; that was a disappointment. "You sit here, just like this. Keep your hands on your lap and you can keep the jacket undone like that. And I'll be right back." Dwicky took one step away from the bed. "Right back." He smiled a little guiltily. "Be a good boy, okay?"

Dib kept a steady gaze on Dwicky the entire time not once daring to look away. Each word that the other said had him nodding his head little by little, while at the same time he tried his best to sit up straight and keep his hands in his lap. "I'll be good. I'll stay just like this and wait for you." He tried his best to smile back at Dwicky, but it was hard since he had to watch the other walk away from him.

Dwicky gave a start when he realized he'd back stepped so far into the door of the room. He jerked back and gave a small nervous laugh before lightly shrugging. The window was quite big, considering there hadn't been anything welcome about the door in Dib's previous room. Dwicky peered out and stuck a hand between the bars to flag down one of the lazy guards near the door. Both of them were sleeping on the job, and didn't care at all for what went on in each individual cell really.  
"Um, hey. Hey? Heeey. Heeey! Helloooo? I'd like to get out for a sec."

Eventually the door was unlocked and opened for Dwicky. The man looked at Dib, giving one last grin and wave before he walked out, the door closing and locking loudly behind him.


	5. Sessions 5

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox  
Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** KittyKatgrl2004

Chapter 05

It felt like forever at least in Dib's mind that he sat on the flat uncomfortable mattress just staring at the door Dwicky had left through. He had done as he was told to do and kept still the entire time except for a few times when he felt the need to curl his fingers in his lap. Over the long period of time that he had been sitting in the room he had slowly started to become more and more upset though tried his best not to let it show.

After a few more moments his eyes finally fell away from the window as he turned his head to look back down at his lap. His finger still moved a bit, but he paid it no mind still too busy listening for foot steps outside the door since his eyes no longer cared to look.

Time ticked on, and neither a sound nor a sight came to grace Dib. Seconds could have been hours as they went, especially to one who hadn't seen a clock in many a year. Though still there came nothing.

Then there it was: careful foot steps, one after the other; closer and closer still in that hallway, approaching Dib's door. But then just as the person came, they went, an orderly dressed in their horrible mint green jump suits that were always too clean and too starchy. They continued on down the hall, never giving Dib's or any other door in passing a second glance or care.

At the sound of footsteps Dib quickly raised wide hopeful eyes back to the door. His expression fell to disappointment when he caught a glance of one of the doctors before the figure disappeared from view completely. His eyes dropped back down and a small whimper came from him that he didn't even try to hide. No one could hear him anyway. After a few seconds one hand slowly rose up to rub at one of his eyes, but just as quickly dropped back down. He continued to listen, but he was slowly starting to become more and more upset.

The silence droned on, worse than Dib's other room. In a much saner wing there wasn't the usual groan or psychotic scream that would tear into the quiet. Now all Dib had for company was the maybe soft sounds of other fellow patience muffled from so many rooms and padding apart; or perhaps they were sounds from inside his own head.  
But still Dwicky hadn't come back.

Dib's eyes darted to each wall when he heard small sounds every few minutes. He was starting to feel on edge again, his nerves getting the best of him. He tried to ignore it all and focus on the barred up window once again, but it was hard when his only source of comfort was gone.

"Come back..." The words fell from Dib's mouth quietly as if he hadn't even said them. "Please come back. Make them go away again." There was no answer though and it had his eyes falling once more before closing tightly to try and block everything out.

There was silence. Sweet silence. No sound, no sight, nothing coming in from the outside; blocked it all out.

But that left every chance for the inside to come out.

'_He's not coming back.' _ one, solitary, firm doubt voiced itself directly center of Dib's mind.

Dib's eyes snapped open just to stare ahead of himself, as if what had spoken was right in front of him. No one was there though. He was the only one in the room which meant just one thing. "Go away." He closed his eyes once more after he spoke the small plea. "Leave me alone. He'll be back. You're wrong. You're always wrong."

_ 'He's not coming back.' _ it echoed more loudly.

i _'You don't see him. You don't see him.'  
_

_'He lied. He's not coming back.'_

_'They said 'no' and then sent him away.'_

_'He's left you alone, alone.'_

_'You can't trust a liar.'  
_

Dib shook his head roughly at the assault of each word said. "Shut up!" He hadn't meant to scream so loud, but he couldn't help it. His hands finally moved out of his lap to rise up and clutch the sides of his head hoping that would stop everything. "Shut up. He'll be back. He won't lie again. I can trust him." He had to calm down, he knew he did or else people outside would hear him. They would put him back in the room with no bed and no window. He had to remember how to calm down. He had to think clearly.

"Think of something. Think..." He mumbled the words quietly to himself for a few seconds trying to ignore everything in his head when a small thought came to him. The calm he felt earlier when Dwicky kissed him. He tried to focus on that small moment while still keeping in the same position hoping they would finally leave.

_'Lies. Liar. You'll believe any lie you hear!'_ their voice grew louder, pulling together to be heard over Dib's calming thought. They wouldn't have it; they wouldn't be silenced just yet.

_'You think believing in a lie makes you sane?'_

A round of cruel laughter, almost cackling laughter sounded from all around Dib's pretty thoughts.

_'He's a liar, you've seen aliens, ghosts and big feet with your own eyes-!'_

_'He's a liar, you've heard voices, voices, voices-!'_

_'You're crazy, crazy, crazy! A crazy boy who loves a liar!'_

_'He probably already has a girlfriend.'_ one quickly added viciously, as their volume was slowly starting to diminish.

Dib shook his head against his hands trying his best to keep the one thought and ignore everything else, but it wasn't working. Everything they were saying was breaking through and his hands slowly curled tighter until his nails began to scratch at his skin.

"No! I'm not supposed to believe in that anymore. None of it's true! I have to get better, let me get better." His voice lowered a bit as he went on. "He does care about me. He wants to stay with me. You're the liars." When Dib gave in to screaming at them, they seemed to swell and consume the empty dark behind the boy's eyes.

_'Going to live happily ever after?'_

_'Happily ever after with MISTER Dwicky?'  
_

_'He only wants ONE thing._' /i one spoke lewdly.

_'He's the sick one, not you.'_

_'Stupid, stupid, crazy little Dib.'_

"It's not true." Dib's voice began to crack as he spoke back in the empty room.

"You don't know that. You don't know anything. None of you do. He wants to help me. He makes me feel safe. He makes all of you go away." Slowly Dib opened his eyes just a crack so that he could stare at the wall across from him.

"You're just saying all of these things because you hate him. You want him to go away. You want me to hate him. I don't want to hate him. I don't want to believe any of it. He has to care..." The last few words sounded so broken and after they were said his eyes immediately shifted back to the door.

_'He'll USE you and then toss you away.'_

_'Toss you away, like garbage. Crazy, crazy garbage.'_

_'He'll use you like Zim.'_

_'He'll laugh at you. Laugh at you for believing his lies.'_

_'He's just like Zim. He'll get what he wants and leave you to rot in a cell.'_

_'Just like now.'_

_'Just like now.'_

_'He's not coming back.'_

Dib's eyes widened once more and turned away from the door to look back down. "He's not..." His body shivered for a quick second before he went on.

"...not like Zim." As much as he tried to believe it the proof was already staring him in the face. It had been forever since Dwicky had left. What if he really had lied? What if he really didn't care? Dib suddenly felt so alone in that moment, more than before.

"He's not coming back..." His eyes closed completely once more and his hands went slack without falling back down.

_'He's not coming back..'_ Dib's words echoed in several other voices in the dark of closed eyes.

_'Dwicky is laughing at you.'_

_'He's laughing with the other doctors at how stupid you are for believing.'_

_'They're laughing at what a stupid boy you are, so full of crazies.'_

_'Believing a grown man would care about some stupid crazy child.'_

_'He left you without your sleeves tied up.'_ /i Another darker, thin whisper spoke up_. 'He knew you'd hurt yourself. He WANTS you to hurt yourself.'_

_'Hurt yourself Dib'_ another voice piped up suggestively.

_'Yes, scratch.'_

_'Scratch!'  
_

_'Scratch, scratch, scratch!'  
_

_'You're so itchy!'_

_'So very very itchy; cheeks, temples, scalp! Itchy, itchy, itchy! It tickles so badly!'_

_'Itchy eyes- scratch them out! Out, out, out, out!'_

Dib's hands twitched for a second. It had been so long since his hands had been free. The jacket kept him completely bound and away from himself. The loud encouragement inside his head was crumbling his already weak mind.

"Itchy." Slowly his nails lightly dug into the skin near his temple and ran down only stopping when they reached his cheeks. The marks he left were red and easily seen on his pale skin. He didn't stop there though. He lifted his hands back up only to run them over the same spot harder. The raw spot became worse while small beads of red formed. His nails dug down farther.

"Make the itchy stop..."

_'Harder.'_

_'Scratch harder.'_

_'Make it go away.'_

_'Harder, harder, harder!'  
_

_'Faster!'_

_'Dig your nails in! It Itchies so badly- it hurts!'_

_'All over your face! Like little insects!'_

_'Crawly little legs, hairy little legs walking all over your skin!'_

_'Scratch! Scratch! Make them go away!'_

_'Quick before they crawl into your eyes!'_

Dib shut his eyes tighter as a small whimper escaped him at the words. His hands drew up across the marks and wounds he had made to trail towards his eyes. His fingers lightly touched his lids for a few seconds before one small sharp nail dug across the thin skin of each causing him to try and shut them tighter and his sounds to get louder.

"_Dib_!" wait, that voice, _that_ voce was external.

Something grasped Dib's wrists, yanking them from his face. It was hands, much bigger and stronger hands that tightly grasped Dib's own. Their shaking matched the panic in _that_ voice.

"Dib, stop! Stop! Dib, can you hear me?" Wide horrified eyes searched the boy, to see if there was any conscious part of Dib to be found.

Dib's whole body tensed up when his hands were taken. His eyes refused to open though and it took awhile before they would even open a tiny bit. His head turned to where the voice was heard just so he could stare at who had grabbed his hands while at the same time struggling the best he could to try and yank them free.

"Let go. I have to. Let go."

It was Dwicky, his expression torn, worried and guilty.

"No. Dib. Stop!" The man yanked down Dib's hands to keep them pressed on the bed on either side of the boy. "Look at me. Look!" his voice bore loud and firm.

"It's me, Dwicky. You have to settle down, you're hurting yourself."

Either guard stared blankly at the scene inside. One finally took note of Dib's injuries, leaving quickly "I'll get the doctor."

Dib paid no attention to the other voice that had made itself known in the cell, his eyes still on the man in front of him.

"Dwicky..." For a few seconds he continued to stare after the other's name left his lips until a frightened expression came over his face and he started to struggle once more.

"No! Let go of me! You liar! You're a liar! You don't care! None of you care! Stop pretending that you do!" He kept struggling as he shouted, but realized that it wasn't doing any good and slowly slumped over as a small shiver passed over his body.

All Dwicky could do was stare, bewildered, even after Dib had stopped struggling. He didn't know what to really say, slowly shaking his head with his mouth agape.

"Dib." His hands curled over Dib's, covering them with his own. "I care. I do care."

Once he was sure the boy was, for the moment enough, subdued before he leaned in, quieting his voice for only Dib to hear. "I was only gone for fifteen minutes." But that was wrong, Dib wasn't like any other kid. It had only been four days, he was expecting too much too soon. Dwicky slowly shook his head, it was obvious he was holding back something in his voice

"I'm sorry. I should have never left you alone like this. This is my fault. I put too much on you too soon." Dwicky's gaze fell heavily to the floor; along with something in his chest.

Dib continued to keep his head down even after Dwicky spoke. After a long while of silence a small quiet sound came from his lips and one of his hands moved around in the other's grip to clasp their fingers. The small shivers still ran through his body every few moments. He still refused to lift his head through it all afraid to actually have eye contact for once.

"I don't like what they told me this time. I don't like what they made me believe. I don't want it to be true. It hurts..."

Dwicky looked back to Dib. He was at a total loss. "I'm sorry." he repeated again quietly.

By then the summoned doctor had arrived. He pushed his long thin body in, crouching by Dwicky, his gaunt face cold and stern with disapproval. He snatched one of Dib's wrists

"Hold him." he ordered Dwicky scoldingly. Not even waiting for Dwicky to properly keep the boy down the doctor lifted Dib's arm up and jabbed a needle unceremonious near the crook of elbow, straight through the jacket sleeve.

"You never leave a patient unattended, Mister Dwicky. _Never_." He injected as he spoke on "Though they may seem as sane as a spring day, they'll fall just as easily back into a psychotic episode." The doctor narrowed his sallow coloured eyes knowingly at Dib.  
Dwicky held stead fast with his free hand at Dib's shoulder.

".. I'm sorry." he echoed himself, staring wide eyed at Dib's chest; the syringe made him feel unbelievably queasy.

Dib's head shot up at the doctor's voice. His hand clung tighter to Dwicky's own while his gaze fell on the man with the needle. For a few moments he tried to struggle or do anything that would help him get away and his eyes finally shot to Dwicky pleading with the man to help him in some way. Feeling the needle in his arm though had him flinching before his expression turned sad; the fact that the other held him down not helping at all. The drug that went through his system quickly began to take effect and his body once more began to slump over as he started to calm down. As his eyes slipped halfway closed he kept them on Dwicky, small noises coming from him as he tried to fight the drug off.

Dwicky could only return Dib's gaze, dejected. His hand on Dib's shoulder tried to keep the boy propped up, but that didn't help the heavy loll of the boy's head.

"Shh.. it's alright." Dwicky whispered, trying to assuage the boy. "Just relax." he squeezed Dib's shoulder a little, his hand squeezing Dib's back. "I'm here. You'll be alright."

"He won't be much of anything anymore now." The doctor released Dib's hand, letting it fall back limply to the boy's side. The doctor tucked away the needle in his clean, perfectly white lab coat. He pulled a sterile piece of gauze from a pocket, pouring a dab of antibacterial healing liquid (the extra stinging brand) on it. With quick motions he dabbed the scratch wounds, cleaning them without much sympathy for the boy.

"This will teach you to do such stupid things to yourself." The doctor glared tight narrowed eyes Dwicky's way. "And this will teach you to unbuckle a crazy boy's restraining jacket. It's on for a i _reason_ /i ." he hissed through thin discolored teeth.

Dib had given more small quiet whines when his wounds were cleaned, but each sound he made was dying away to nothing but complete silence. His eyes started to close all the way while his head fell on Dwicky's hand no longer having anymore will to fight what was in his system. The only other real conscious move he made was a small tiny twitch of fingers against the other's and even that could barely be felt.

The doctor stuck on medical strips along the worse wounds up and down Dib's face. He continued to chastise Dwicky more, but each word, each syllable was nothing but a smudge of sounds in Dib's ears, drifting further and further from him.

Sometime Dwicky gently laid him down on the bed, supporting his head until Dib settled comfortably on it. The man kept hold of Dib's hand, softly rubbing the immobile fingers. He murmured something, but it was hard to hear, or make sense of it.

Everything blurred into each other, until there was nothing left but a big black mess of torpor.


	6. Sessions 6

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Lint

Chapter 06 

It was many hours later that his eyes slowly opened, little by little, in the darkness of the padded cell. Dib lay completely still as he tried to figure out why it was suddenly so dark compared to the brightness of earlier. Nothing would come to his foggy mind though. All he could remember was being so itchy and needing to scratch badly. That one, small memory had his fingers twitching, but this time they felt different. He could feel the familiar feeling of cloth against his fingertips and when he tried to move his arms, they refused to raise much, if at all. The entire situation had him sitting up without giving much thought to the fact he was lying down in the first place. He immediately started to struggle, trying to get out of the bonds that were so familiar, but he hated all the same.

Dib's sudden motion had the close body next to him give a start, only to be thrown back a bit when Dib sat up. The jerk of surprise they gave sent them teetering, only to fall ungracefully off the bed and onto the tile floor with a surprised cry.

Long legs and spats still draped on the bed's edge, and the body on the floor blinked hard, giving a groan.

Dwicky gave a delayed 'Ow.', followed by an 'I deserve that.' under his breath.

The random noises and words had Dib cease his struggling to look to where it had all come from. It was hard for him to see much in the room, especially now, but he tried and made out the legs still hanging on the bed. For a few seconds, Dib just sat there until he slowly scooted towards the edge of the bed and looked over with wide eyes. He bit at his lip before finally speaking in a nervous voice, as if the other would jump up and bite him. "Are you okay?"

Dwicky rubbed his head a moment, then his shoulder, but gave up on body's pain and let his arms flop back down, giving another soft 'ow' when they hit the floor. "The tile is really cold." Dwicky gave a matter-o-fact observation. "You're awake." he gave a more chipper observation, but he kept his voice quiet considering just how late it was. "How are you feeling?" there was obvious worry that he tried to keep out, but it only made his voice strained.

Dib looked away at the question and started to struggle with the jacket once again as he answered. "My face hurts and I want out of this jacket. I want to be able to touch things again. It's not fair." After a few moments, he finally gave up on the bonds for good while letting out a defeated sound. His eyes moved back to Dwicky and he stayed silent for a while longer before his voice broke the silence again, but much quieter than before. "Get back up here, please..."

Dwicky removed his feet from the bed, and sat up with a groan. He rubbed the back of head and poor lower back for a good moment before he attempted to stand. He leaned back, his spine giving a nice satisfying crack and he shook out his feet with a pleased sort of noise. Dwicky then sat on the edge of the bed beside Dib.

He looked at the boy, his brows raising a little he asked in quiet seriousness "Do you.." his hand immediately dropped before it could move towards Dib "Do you remember anything?"

Dib watched Dwicky until the man was seated beside him. He let his eyes drop down, thinking over the question. "I remember feeling really itchy. They kept making me scratch. I wanted to scratch. Everything they told me, made me want to scream at them, but I also couldn't stop listening." He quickly shook his head before dropping it lower. "Nothing else. I can't remember anything else after. So much fog." His voice lowered a bit more. "I'm sorry..."

"No." Dwicky cut over top, his voice thick with disappointment "No, it's my fault. I shouldn't have left you alone. If I had done up your sleeves, it would have never happened. I thought it would be alright. I didn't think I would be too long. I should have known better. This..." he laid out a palm, spread his fingers, and looked at the lines and creases ", this doesn't just go away over night." Dwicky closed his hand and put his other over top of it, slowly wringing them. The worry was obvious even if his voice was steady "Too much, too fast." he slowly shook his head, shoulders sagging a little.

Dib slowly leaned down a bit so he could get a better view of Dwicky's face since the man was as slumped over as Dib himself. His eyes went wide for a few minutes before they lowered halfway and stared at the other's face. "You came back. They kept telling me you didn't care. Everything they said scared me. I didn't want to believe them, but it started to become so hard." His teeth moved out to bite at his bottom lip for a few seconds before he made the decision to move closer, never breaking the eye contact. "Please don't stop..."

Dwicky stared at Dib, his brows furrowing; there was hurt in the man's eyes. "Of course I came back. I told you I'd be as quick as I could." He sat up a little. "We just have to work harder now." He gestured for Dib to come near, welcoming the boy into a warm embrace. "So that something like this doesn't happen again."

Dib's face fell when he saw Dwicky's expression, but he tried his best to ignore it all for a moment, just for the sake of moving forward to settle himself in the man's lap. He gave a small whine at having his hands bound, only to move that much closer with his side against the other's chest. "Please don't be upset." His voice came out small and just a bit frightened. "I know you care. I'll try harder, I really will." He lifted his head to look at Dwicky's face once more, his eyes darting. "Just please don't be upset anymore."

Dwicky tried to keep his expression from being somber; he did manage a small smile, though it was somewhat sad. His arms kept tightly around Dib, the man practically clinging to the small body in their embrace.

If that was what happened in fifteen minutes, Dwicky didn't want to fathom two days; he was already shaken.

Dwicky slowly shook his head, and rocked the both of them gently back and forth; though whom it was meant to sooth was debatable. "I know you will." he finally answered quietly. His smile grew a little wider, and all the more depressing. "I'm more worried than upset."

Dib let his head fall back down after a few seconds and he tried his best to cuddle closer as Dwicky held him. "Why are you worried? You have no reason to be worried. I'm fine now." His eyes narrowed a bit on the wall. He hated being tied up. He wanted his arms free again so he could wrap them around the other just like before. Instead, all he could do was bury his face further against Dwicky's chest as some form of comfort.

Dwicky swung his legs back onto the bed, skooching back to lean comfortably on the wall. He gathered the boy up to keep cuddled against his front. He pressed a cheek against the top of Dib's head, not answering immediately. "Don't listen to what you hear." he started quietly. "Anything that you hear is destructive, and can only hurt you. I know it's hard to ignore." A hand begun to gently rub Dib's back between his shoulder blades. "But you're stronger than them. You've done it before. J-just..." Dwicky cleared his throat "go over what we talked about. Think of one word; concentrate on that and nothing else. And, if your hands are free..." Dwicky's hand couldn't help but stop and twitch a little to grasp the excess fabric of the jacket "just weave your fingers together and keep them in your lap." His hand continued rubbing Dib's back "You never touch your face, not for any reason what-so-ever."

Dib slowly nodded as best he could for the moment, the touches on his back calmed his nerves. "I won't. I'll listen to you this time. I won't believe them next time." He stayed silent for a few moments, just enjoying the hold Dwicky had on him. He couldn't help but speak up again, his voice just a bit hopeful. "Does that mean you'll undo the jacket again? Just like before?"

"I can't." Dwicky's voice was quiet, and he ruffled Dib's hair as he spoke. "The doctor wasn't exactly happy with what happened today. So..." he allowed the sound to peter off. His hand paused again, drawing up to softly run along the shaggy hair at the back of Dib's head. "I was only allowed to stay tonight if I kept your jacket on."

Dib's whole body slumped against Dwicky's chest at the answer. He tried his best not to seem too upset, but it was hard. "Yes you can. I'll be good this time." He gave a soft sound from the back of his throat before he lifted his head to try to look at Dwicky's face through the darkness. "Please, I just want to hold you. Just like before. Please let me..."

Dwicky didn't meet Dib's gaze. He didn't raise his head, the shadows cast upon his face made it hard to read his expression. But it was easy to see the man's thick brows crease. A hand did raise, meekly at first, to touch the edge of one of the clean white bandages vertical on Dib's face. Fingers followed it down, until they fell off the edge of Dib's jaw. "..I do care." Dwicky finally, so very quietly, spoke.

A small frown formed on Dib's face at the quiet words. The touch to bandages had his eyes darting to the side for a split second before they moved back as the hand fell down lower. "I know you do. I know you care." Dib moved his head so that he could press his lips to Dwicky's fingers before they fell completely away, letting them linger there for a few moments before moving his head back up and glancing back at the man. "I care too. Please..."

Dwicky froze. His hand fell to Dib's shoulder and kissed fingertips fiddled with the jacket's fabric.

It was a shallow breath that moved the man's chest and Dwicky raised his head a little to finally look at Dib. The worry that was etched on his face seemed on pause. "You do?" It wasn't that he doubted Dib, it just surprised Dwicky to hear him say it.

Dib grew nervous and it caused him to drop his eyes just so he could look at Dwicky's shirt instead of the man's face. "Yes, I do." He dropped his head the rest of the way so that he could bury his face back against the other's chest. "I care about you." His voice became shaky and muffled. "I'm sorry. Is that bad?"

Dwicky's arms slipped back around to firmly hold and assure the boy. "No." he quickly spoke. "No, no, it's alright. It's a good thing." He dropped his head down to lean his brow atop the boys head. Slowly, he shook his head and nuzzled Dib's. "It's good to hear." Dwicky held tighter, digging his fingers into the straight jacket's sides. "I'm sure it must feel good to say."

Dib's body eased up at the words and he moved closer. His fears easily left him and he couldn't help a small smile, even though it was hidden by Dwicky's shirt. "It does. It feels really good. I'm glad I can tell you." He stayed in that position for a few more moments until he raised his head and his whole body a bit so he was even with Dwicky. He leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss to the man's lips, catching mostly the corner and almost missing his mark in the darkness. The smile was still on his face when he pulled back. "You can't be upset or worried anymore, okay?"

Dwicky gave a little chuckle at that, unable to keep the smile off his face. He really couldn't argue with that. His hands drew down to rub the boy's sides, assuring Dib that he was indeed talked into it. "Alright. I won't." A hand snuck up and took the side of Dib's jaw, gently pulling the boy in for a more 'spot on' kiss. He leaned back and smiled a little more definite. "I'll be happy now. See." Dwicky moved forward again to press his lips against Dib's, lingering more affectionately the second time.

Dib couldn't help the pleased noise that escaped him as Dwicky's lips pressed against his own. Everything that had frightened him earlier suddenly disappeared. The small sensations from before were missing. Every bit of touch that he wanted wasn't there, and he broke the kiss to stare up at the other with a small, disappointed glance. Instead of falling back down against Dwicky's chest, he leaned forward a bit more just so he could move his head to the side and press his cheek against the man's own, nuzzling the skin as he made some sort of contact.

Dwicky let his eyes flutter closed as he pressed his cheek back into the nuzzle. He gave a long, soft cathartic sigh near Dib's ear. "Everything will be alright." He leaned his head forward to bridge the small gap and brush his lips against the boy's ear. "Everything will be okay." he murmured. Fingers slipped under the bottom hem of the straitjacket, smoothing along the warm, untouched skin at the boy's lower sides.

Dib gave a small sigh against Dwicky's cheek at the words as well as the touches near his sides. Slowly, he lowered his head to rest it on the man's shoulder, using it as a pillow while moving his eyes up to try and look at Dwicky's face. "I know." His eyes narrowed for a few seconds as he thought something over, finally voicing it while looking to where he thought the door was. "You don't think they'll move me, do you? I was getting used to this room. I don't think I would like going back to my old room. Besides..." His voice fell a little lower. "...you helped me get a new room. I don't want them to take it from me."

"No." Dwicky glanced at Dib. "No, they won't move you. It was just a little incident." He nodded to himself, dark hair falling to his brow and obscuring some of his vision; it didn't matter anyway, it was already dark, he could feel what he needed to see. "It was my fault anyway." He'd taken the heat and verbal lashings from the doctors; Dwicky could still feel the mental welts they left. The doctor that drugged Dib had been particularly cruel. But, better him than Dib.

Dwicky turned a little to glance back at Dib again. He ever so lightly touched the bandage on the boy's cheek, gently rubbing the skin beside it instead. "It doesn't hurt too badly does it?"

Dib squinted one eye closed, afraid that it would indeed hurt, but when no real pain came, he slowly shook his head against Dwicky's shoulder. "No, it doesn't. It doesn't hurt, not very much." He leaned into the touch before going on, his eyes closing a bit. "I didn't even realize I hurt myself. It didn't hurt at the time. I just really had to scratch. I had to do something to get rid of the itchy feeling."

"You were hurting yourself, Dib. Really hurting yourself." Dwicky's hand faltered, and instead petted the base of the boy's head with his thumb. "You were in a frenzy. You were completely out of it, determined to scratch your entire face up. You scratched the sides of your face really badly. You were scratching your eyelids when I came in. What if you did hit your eyes? What if you really hurt yourself?" Dwicky paused for a moment. "You can't let it happen again, Dib. I don't want you to hurt yourself. You have to stand up to yourself, fight what you hear with... pacifism." Dwicky's hand was still under the jacket and slowly rubbing the small of Dib's back. "Verbally say the things to yourself that make you feel safe. Don't answer what you hear at all, no matter what they say. Just go on listing, counting them on each finger in your lap, keeping your hands on your lap. Ignore them. Keep doing it until you feel safe, calm, and all you can hear is your own voice speaking aloud."

Dib scooted up a little so that his face was closer to Dwicky's neck and there he placed a quick, shy kiss before answering, letting his head lay back down. "I'll try. I promise I'll try my best. I don't want them to take hold of me again. I hate when it happens." His words slowly died away and soon the disappointment from earlier returned. "I won't have to worry about it again, though. You can't let me out anymore. I have to stay like this for even longer now."

The man's face warmed over at the intimate, albeit small kiss; he was thankful for the dark. Dwicky made a small noise, but frowned when Dib spoke again. "It helps to learn from your mistakes." Under the jacket, his hand ran up and down Dib's bony spine; the boy was so thin, who knew what they were feeding him here.

Dib let out a sad noise against Dwicky's neck at that statement. "You don't want to let me out then?" The thought had his body slumping a bit and even the touches on his back couldn't ease him anymore. "You don't want to let me free anymore? You think I'll hurt myself again. You don't believe me. I said I was sorry. I didn't know." He buried his face further against skin instead of the fabric of the shirt. "It's not fair..."

Dwicky felt his chest grow hot; a tight ache slowly crawled down to his belly. He tightly reapplied his arms around Dib, pulling the boy close. "I want to." Dwicky tried to keep his tone quiet, but it shook anyway. "I do. But..-" But- if he crossed one too many lines too soon they'd fire him, and tell the boy's father. And worse, forbid him to see Dib ever again. And for Dib to have back what he'd lost, only to take it away again would surely destroy him; it would kill him. But if things went on how the doctors wanted it, Dib would be drugged into a coma, tied to a bed, and left to live his days as a slug. Dib's father would never come, and the boy would be forgotten.

"But-" Dwicky stuttered on awkwardly ", I dunno…" He frowned and scowled at himself on the inside. He wasn't supposed to be so easily argued into giving in; he had such a weakness for the poor boy, it couldn't be helped.

Dwicky's tone of voice had Dib lifting his head once more so that he could stare the man in the eyes as best he could without disturbing the embrace. For a few seconds he tried to catch any expression before giving in and leaning forward to press a quick kiss to the other's lips and hit his mark the second time around. He pulled back so his words could be felt against Dwicky's lips. "It's okay. I'll be okay like this. If I'm good they'll let you do it again, right?" He gave a small smile before finally pulling his head back a bit more. "I just have to be really good."

Dwicky pressed his lips into a thin line. "Undoing the jacket is a privilege." he quietly explained. He thoughtfully licked his lips a moment. And what? This was a punishment? That wasn't a fair way of thinking, especially considering Dib couldn't help hearing things. For the first time since Dib had been here, things were looking up, it wasn't fair to tear it all down and take it away because of a few scratches.

Damnit, that kiss didn't exactly help him; nor the subtle taste on his lips. Dib was still smiling at him so hopefully. Dwicky kicked himself.

_You're mixing business with pleasure, bad Dwicky! Bad _

"But.." Dwicky faltered, it was obvious he was caving in and he mentally kicked himself again.

_ Bad Dwicky! Don't give into the cute schizo boy  
_

Dib's head tilted to the side a bit when Dwicky stopped speaking midway. A curious expression came over his face, causing the smile to disappear for the moment, but it was easy to tell he wasn't at all upset. "But...?"

"Damnit." Dwicky hung his head, defeated. How could he resist _that _ face?

Dib blinked his eyes and straightened his head. The word surprised him for a moment, but he easily got over it and leaned down, trying to see Dwicky's face. "What's the matter?" His eyes lowered and a small worried expression came over his face. "Did I do something wrong?"

Dwicky shook his head, keeping it bowed for a moment. He rose it up with a small, nervous laugh. "No. It's me, it's all me." He pulled Dib nearer so he could steal a quick kiss. Freeing a hand, he took up the boy's chin, running a thumb along its edge. "Promise me something." Dwicky leaned forward, but instead of pressing his lips to Dib's, he nuzzled them below the crook of jaw at the boy's throat; a slow motion of lips against soft skin.

Dib let out a small, content noise at the feel of lips somewhere else on his skin. His eyes closed a bit more before he gave a small sigh and tried to move even closer to the other body. The words Dwicky said had registered in his mind, but it took Dib awhile to answer because of the relaxation he felt. His voice was soft and quiet when he finally did speak. "What do I have to promise?"

Dwicky felt the words against his lips as Dib spoke. He tilted Dib's chin up, letting go of it only to tug down the stiff collar of the straitjacket so that he could pad lips across the slender throat. His other arm could only hold the boy tighter. "Promise me" Dwicky murmured against Dib's neck, "that when I'm not there... you'll be safe, and wait for me."

It was hard to keep the whine from escaping, but Dib couldn't help it. He started to squirm and struggle a bit against the jacket once more. "I promise." He gave another quiet whine when the jacket wouldn't give way and settled down, just enjoying the small sensations Dwicky's kisses and words caused against his skin. "I'll be safe. I'll be okay. I'll do everything you told me to do."

Arms wrapped back around Dib, and Dwicky strongly held the boy. It was different this time; it was more clingy; needy to feel that the boy was still there and wouldn't suddenly disappear in the dark. Yet at the same time it was firm, anchoring, grounding Dib to that moment. Dwicky leaned his forehead against the crook of Dib's neck. "Promise?" he repeated almost inaudibly; just wanting to hear it again, just once more to assure his aching worry. Dwicky shook his head, half nuzzling; it was going to be the longest weekend of his life.

Dib easily fell into the strong embrace, his head lying against the top of Dwicky's own and staying there until the man decided to move. "I promise. I mean it. I'll be good while I wait for you." He nuzzled his own face lightly through Dwicky's hair before turning his head to the side, allowing the words to pass his lips one more time. "I promise..."

Dwicky let out a warm sigh against Dib, relaxing that much more at the words, but most of all, the nuzzle. The man seemed to fidget at the boy's back, little nervous, a little clumsy. "I believe you." He paused a moment to raise his head to peer past Dib's shoulder, but the darkness didn't help. "I do. And," Dwicky swallowed a moment "two days may seem like forever, but I won't let you leave my thoughts. And I'll be here bright and early Monday. Because, even though it's only been a short while since I've been back... four days just isn't enough for me." He finally managed to smile weakly as Dib's sleeves finally came loose from their bonds.

The words had Dib blinking his eyes in mild surprise, but it was the fact he no longer felt restrained that had them snap open completely. As soon as he was able to move his hands around better, he quickly, but carefully, moved them in front of his body and stared at the long sleeves for a few seconds. Finally his eyes moved back to Dwicky's face and it was hard to keep the smile off his own as he leaned forward to wrap each arm around the man's neck, clinging as tightly as his own body would allow.

Dwicky gave a small sound, but he gave up on anything else besides hugging Dib tightly around the middle. He buried his head between the boy's head and shoulder, rocking him a moment. He let Dib cling to him for as long as he needed it, not saying one word.

Dib continued to cling, moving that much closer when Dwicky held him again. One of his buried hands moved up to try and touch the back of the man's neck, but quickly dropped back down, continuing to hold on. Instead, his face nuzzled against the other's head as he gave a small, happy noise, more than pleased with the situation. "I like this much better..." The words were so quiet that they were almost whispered.

Dwicky only gave a small nod against Dib's head, holding the boy tighter, if that was even possible. After a while, his arms ached and his shoulders and neck hurt from Dib's clinging embrace, but he wasn't giving any of it up.

After a few more moments, Dib finally pulled back just a bit, his arms still loosely wrapped around the other and refusing to drop down any farther. He kept his eyes on Dwicky's face for a few seconds before giving the other a small smile and moving down a bit so that he could lay his head under the other's chin, keeping quiet for only a short time. "See, I'm okay. I promise they won't be able to get to me anymore. I'll be fine when you have to go. I'll try really hard."

Dwicky kept Dib's head comfortably tucked under his chin, snug in his arms. His eyes fell half closed lazily, content, and for the most part, calm; despite having broken a horrible taboo. "I know you will. Though, the jacket has to be done back up before tomorrow." Technically it was tomorrow, somewhere late in the middle of the night. Dwicky cursed the bleach white walls for not dictating some sort of time mechanism aside from 'dark equals bedtime!' If the doctors caught wind of what he was doing right now, well, Dwicky pushed that minor detail to the back of his mind into the closet of other guilty things.

"But for now, just enjoy it." Dwicky added on a proper, positive note.

Dib's body tensed a bit at the first few words, but he didn't let the information get him down too much. "I am because you're still here. I don't think I would be as happy right now if you weren't. Even if someone let my hands free." His arms fell down a bit more, but stopped halfway just so he could try and lightly grip at Dwicky's shoulders through the cloth. "When you leave what will you do? Are you just going to go home?"

"Hmm." Dwicky hummed with off handed thoughtfulness. "Yea. Go home. Do some shopping, buy groceries. Dust. Do the laundry." He tilted his head one way then the other as he listed things off with little interest. He rested his head straight back on Dib's and gave a small chuckle. "Real fun activities, I know." Dwicky raised his gaze up to the ceiling. He quirked a brow. A padded ceiling? Since when would that be applicable? "Maybe I'll read." he idly suggested to himself, though he didn't sound very enthused about it.

Dib blinked his eyes a bit, thinking over each thing Dwicky said. "I used to have to buy the groceries and stuff when we ran out. I did the laundry too, but I wasn't that good at it." He slowly closed his eyes while letting out a small sigh. "It all sounds a bit boring to me. It would be better if you could be here and we could stay like this. I understand that you do have to go, but I don't want to let go either. Is that selfish?"

"Yeaa." Dwicky grinned some. "But it's alright to be selfish once and a while. As long as it doesn't hurt anyone. But I feel the same way, so, no harm done." He pursed his lips thoughtfully. "Maybe I'll lie on the couch and stare at the ceiling. Hm. Maybe I'll even clean the ceiling." Dwicky blinked and cleared his throat. "Sorry, I'm staring at the ceiling right now." He closed his eyes. "I'll talk to your father too, like I said before."

Those words had Dib tense up completely, and his hands tried their best to grip at Dwicky's shoulders where they couldn't before. "You're really going to talk to him?" He tried to bury his face a bit more in the man's neck, hoping that would make the situation better in some way. "What are you going to say to him? What are you going to tell him? Are you going to tell him what happened? What I did to myself?" His voice became a bit shaky despite how muffled it was. "Please don't tell him about that..."

Dwicky rubbed Dib's back; the movement was becoming an unconscious habitual action now. "I'll tell him that his son has made great progress in just four days. That he's quite coherent and aware of who he is and where he is. That he can hold a perfectly normal conversation like any other person." His fingers pressed a little harder to gently knead Dib's tight, knotted shoulder muscles under the thick fabric. "That his son has given up his silly ideas about the paranormal and he just wants to come out, and be home with those he loves. And move on with his life."

"That I love..." Dib's body relaxed easily under the touches to his back. After the few words left his mouth, he let his arms drop down completely to wrap around Dwicky's waist so that he could cling to that part of the man instead. His voice fell a bit, but there was no more fear as he spoke. "You really think all of that? Is all of that true? Am I really doing that good?"

"I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true." Dwicky leaned back enough to look down at Dib. He smiled optimistically "Which is why I still think he'll probably visit you Monday as well." He raised a hand to idly toy with the scythe lock that still managed to stay aloft despite the greasiness of unwashed hair. Dwicky blinked, closing one eye and noting that the scythe lock was just as greasy in texture. He stuck out a tongue before speaking on "Though you'll need to have a bath before then."

Dib shook his head a bit at the idea while his arms held tighter. "I hate when they have to clean me up here. They drug me just so they don't have to deal with me. I can hardly remember what happens before and after." He gave a small sound from the back of his throat. "I'm nervous. It's been so long since I've seen my dad. I don't think I would know what to say, or how to act. I'm afraid that I'm still gonna disappoint him no matter what." His voice got even lower as he tried to bury his face deeper. "This isn't what he wanted from me at all."

"Just... do like you're doing now." Minus the clinging; Membrane didn't seem like the most affectionate of fathers. "Have a normal, civil conversation with him. Tell him how you feel, how you miss him; and your sister. Then just answer anything he has to say or ask. Take your time and some deep breathes." Dwicky leaned down and kissed softly at what little peeking of Dib's forehead he could find. "He'll love you no matter what happens; he is your dad after all." Though Dwicky smiled on the outside, he frowned on the inside; that felt like such a lie.

Dib eased up a little at the kiss and stayed silent. He kept his head buried for awhile longer while his hidden hands moved up and down Dwicky's back every few seconds. He finally lifted his head after a bit, though hesitant to do so, wanting to look at the other's face as he spoke. "I can do all that. I think. I'll try at least. You said I'm doing better, so maybe I'll be able to do it all and he'll let me out." His eyes lowered at the last few words, a small worried expression on his face. There was a bit of shifting behind Dwicky as Dib started to fidget. "Will you be here when he visits? Will I still be able to see you?"

Dwicky nodded. "I can be there if you'd like. Of course." He gave an assuring smile. "You'll do fine, I'm sure. I'll be right there if you need me." This time he was able to kiss the center of Dib's forehead.

Dib couldn't help but give a small smile, all the nervous feelings vanished at Dwicky's words. He finally allowed some excitement to slip through as he squirmed around a bit in the other's lap, the worry in his voice disappeared. "I really want to show him how well I've gotten. I want him to be proud of me. He'll see that they moved me to a better place and that will have to impress him." His eyes left Dwicky's just so he could look off to the side. "He'll see that I'm doing okay and so he won't have a reason to call me those things anymore."

Dwicky nodded in agreement "Yea, you've done pretty good." He stopped and straightened a little "Wait, 'those things'?" He blinked.

Dib quickly moved his eyes back to Dwicky's face and stared for a moment before slowly nodding his head. "He calls me insane and crazy." His hands started to fidget inside the sleeves once again and he looked down between their bodies. "He used to take me to the main lab he worked at because he wanted me to stop believing in other things and focus on what he wanted me to run later on. I hated going, though, because the people he worked with would stare at me funny. It was like I had done something wrong or just strange." He barely glanced back up. "I think my dad told them about me. Just the things he didn't like."

Dwicky settled a hand atop Dib's head, idly petting. "Sometimes parents can be more critical than we are about ourselves. He just wants," what's best for him; Dwicky paused and ruffled Dib's hair a bit "what's best for you. I'm sure he just wants you to pursue a career that will make you as successful as he is. Though," Dwicky leaned from the wall, letting his hands take up either side of Dib's face. And his voice fell quieter before he spoke on "I'll tell you a little something." Dwicky met Dib's eyes before continuing "You don't need your parent's consent to be happy."

Dib blinked his eyes at those last few words, a small surprised look coming over his face. "I don't?" A small frown came to his lips and although Dwicky's hands were on his face, his eyes still fell, though he leaned a bit into the touch. "It feels like I do. Not all the time, but sometimes it feels that way. Whenever he wouldn't believe me, it was upsetting. So what if I do need it to be happy?"

"Sometimes." Dwicky's forehead touched Dib's. "But not always. When we grow up, we leave our parents to take on our own lives. We pursue what makes us happy. Because then, as adults, only our own opinions count, because only we can make ourselves happy." He brushed a small kiss against Dib's lips. "So, don't worry too much about your dad."

Dib closed his eyes at the kiss for a split second before opening them once again at the words spoken. "So, I should just do what I want so that I can be happy, but at the same time I need to get better." His teeth moved out to bite at his lip for a few moments as he continued to stare up at Dwicky. Slowly, one of his arms moved away from the other's waist to raise up and lay against one of the hands that was on his cheek. "You make me happy. What if I just want to be around you?"

Dwicky closed his eyes, his forehead pressing a little more against Dib's. Complications. The man stayed quiet, his smile growing a little wider, and a little sad. "I'll always be here for you Dib." his voice went strangely professional. He cleared his throat and when he spoke, his voice went quieter. "I, um… yea. I'm not going anywhere, no where soon." Dwicky couldn't exactly explain things to Dib, not right now, not when Dib seemed to have the simplicity of a child.

_Bad Dwicky; you're just putting more crazy ideas in the poor kid's head.  
_

Dib's eyes narrowed a bit for a few seconds, but slowly a small smile formed on his face and he eased up. "Good, because I don't want you to ever leave. Not even if I get better. I like how you make me feel. I want to feel like this all the time. I don't want it to all disappear just because everything is okay." He leaned forward a bit more as best he could, considering the contact that was already between them. "You don't want it to go away either, do you?"

"No." Dwicky spoke in quiet honesty. He glanced to the side at Dib's sleeve covered hand on his own. His hands released the boy's face to take the other's hands gently between them. "No, I don't" He then began the tedious task of rolling up the sleeve again; against his already burnt judgment. "I want.." _you to stay with me _ "you to get better." Dwicky's lips pressed together for a thin smile. "Soon. Yes, that's what I want."

Dib's eyes quickly moved to see what Dwicky was doing and soon his fingers were curling inside the sleeve as his hand waited to be let out. "It'll happen. At least I hope it does." His eyes moved back up once again to gaze at the other's face. "What I did earlier. That probably didn't help them see that I was trying, but I'll make them see that I really am. They'll have to let me out then. I'll ignore everything that the voices tell me. They can't hurt me if I do that." His eyes fell back down and a small smile came to his lips. "Then I'll be able to go back outside and see everything that I've missed."

Dwicky couldn't help but give a more genuine smile, he couldn't stay down when he saw Dib smile, or heard such promising things from the boy's lips. "Yep. You'll be able to do many exciting things." He reached into the sleeve, feeling Dib's small, thin fingers. Softly, he smoothed his own before curling his hand around Dib's, tugging the sleeve back. Once he had Dib's hand out, he lifted it up and kissed the boy's knuckle. "So tell me, what's the first thing you want to do when you get out?" Dwicky grinned against the boy's hand, kissing each knuckle, softly sucking.

Dib's eyes closed halfway at the soft feel of lips against his hand. His mind tried to go over the question, but Dwicky's actions made it a bit difficult. After a few seconds he finally blinked his eyes and made a small noise before finally trying to answer. "I'm not really sure. There's a lot of things I would want to do. I could always go eat at my favorite Chinese restaurant. I really do miss real food." A small sound left him as he continued to think, his tongue moving out of his mouth for a few quick seconds. "This feels weird. Usually I'd be worrying about trying to stop Zim, but I'm not thinking about that at all." He paused for a moment before giving a tiny, shy smile. "Well, except for just then..."

Dwicky chuckled a second before grinning against Dib's hand again. He'd taken to watching Dib's tongue, but his gaze flicked back up to Dib's eyes. "Good. That's good. Go on." he encouraged with a kiss to the knuckles on the boy's fingers "Tell me about all the things you'd like to do when you get out. Everything; no matter how trivial you think it is." He rested the back of Dib's fingertips against his lips, softly rubbing his palm with his fingers.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky, his fingers twitching every now and then before he finally turned his gaze away and up to the ceiling. "Well, I sort of miss Skool. Not the people there. I just miss going there because it was a place away from home. When I paid attention, I did really well and I wonder if I still could." He dropped his eyes back down just so he could watch Dwicky once again as he went on. "I also want to just look at the stars again. Just like I used to. I want to spend as many hours as I can just staring at them because I miss doing it so much." His eyes became a bit distant and his voice lowered a bit. "I want to do that first..."

Dwicky sat up a little. "At the apartment complex I live in, up top, the roof is nice and flat." He gestured with one hand, holding Dib's with his other. "There's this rise where the entrance to the roof is. You can sit there without worrying of being found. The sky practically hangs down on top of you when you lay there." He took Dib's hand in either of his, looking down at them. "It's wonderful in the summer; nice and warm." Dwicky glanced at the boy.

Dib raised his eyes to look into Dwicky's own. "Really?" Without even waiting for the other to reply, he leaned forward just so he could press a kiss to the man's lips. The soft contact didn't last long though, and Dib just as quickly pulled back, but only a little bit. His words were spoken against the other's lips. "I wanna go. When I get out, that's where I wanna go."

"Mmf." Dwicky closed his eyes and smiled practically from ear to ear. "Suure." he went on against Dib's lips. He stayed like that a moment before leaning back so he could speak "I'd be glad to. You could, in theory, spend the night at my place." He blinked and gained a more mischievous sort of expression "I could attempt to cook us dinner. Lord knows I haven't done that in a while." He looked skyward a moment; at least, not Earthly meals. "Yea, haven't attempted that in a _long _ while." He cleared his throat purposely before continuing the smile he had started. "Though I suppose it wouldn't be fair of me to steal you for the i _entire /i _ day." Not 'fair', but he wouldn't mind it; not at all.

Dib couldn't stop the smile that formed on his face at Dwicky's words, and he quickly shook his head at the last few that came from the other's mouth. "No, it's okay. I'm sure it would be. Besides, I would want to spend time with you." The smile slowly disappeared as he started to become nervous. His eyes fell down to his lap as he went on. "If you were really okay with it, and whenever they do let me out, I really would want to visit you. I would want to keep doing all of this. I would miss you a lot if I didn't get to see you."

"Hmm." Dwicky truly and dramatically feigned thought, eyes looking up, brow furrowing as he rubbed his goatee thoughtfully. "I don't knooow." He glanced at Dib through one eye, closing the other as if that would give him a deeper perspective. One of his hands went to Dib's chin, tilting the boy's head up to examine closely. When his face was close enough to Dib's, Dwicky's expression changed a little softer, more playful "Your family," he pressed a quick kiss near Dib's chin "may not," he pressed another at the boy's cheek. "get you," then another at the end of jaw line, before stealing another below the boy's ear. He raised his head to finish speaking on the boy's ear warmly with a chuckle. "back." He pressed a lingering kiss there, sucking the lobe a little with his lips. "I may just steal you away."

Each kiss had a small laugh coming from Dib that he tried his best to keep in. The playfulness in Dwicky's voice lifted his own mood even more. The last, small kiss on his ear had the laughter dying down to a small whimper and he started squirming a bit against the other once again. His eyes blinked closed a few times before any kind of words would come from him. "I don't mind..."

Lips slipped down from Dib's ear to his neck. "Careful," Dwicky mused against the skin, tugging away the stiff collar to reveal more of it "I might take you up on it." Dwicky continued to softly assault the boy's neck, trying as hard as he could not to mar the pale skin with teeth, or sucking too hard (as tempting as it was). As high and covering as the straitjacket's collar was, someone could still find a mysterious mark, and worse, blame Dib for some sort of self hickey mutilation. So the man's lips treaded gently, slowly, brushing with lazy affection against the skin.

Dib's soft whimpers turned into small, pleased noises at each bit of contact that went below the annoying jacket. His hand that was free of the sleeve moved up to bury itself in Dwicky's hair at the back of the man's neck while his other arm clung to the other body tightly. "I want to be with you all the time." His words were nervous again and it took him awhile before he spoke up once more. "I really like you. I don't care if you steal me away."

Hands slipped as far under the bottom hem of the straight jacket as the thick fabric would let, slinking up along the warm, hidden skin underneath. Dwicky's hands slowly smoothed up and down Dib's sides, needing him closer, noting just how exactly thin the boy was. His fingers tickled down near the boy's hips and Dwicky paused his lips against the boy's neck.

He was supposed to say something back, wasn't he? Though if he said anything more profound, and said what he wanted to, he was going to get them in real trouble. This already, could and would. But Dwicky couldn't help it. "I really like you a lot... too." Dwicky looked skyward, rolling his eyes at himself; well, that felt mature _and _ articulate.

Dib's body twisted a bit at the hands on his sides, the tickling sensations caused a small noise to come from him. His hand in Dwicky's hair moved up a bit to pet through the soft texture. "Then they were wrong." A small smile came over his face and he leaned forward a bit to lay the side of his head against the other's hair. "Everything they said really was wrong. I'm not crazy for liking you. Now that I know that, I really don't have a reason to believe them anymore."

Dwicky gave a subtle nod against Dib's neck so that he didn't disturb the boy's head on his. "Good." He let a relaxed breath leave him. Subdued by fingers running through his hair, he lazily ran his hand against the small of Dib's back.

He kept like that, not saying much else. The fatigue of the late night began to creep up on him, and he felt so comfortable and relaxed with the boy against him. It was hard not to fall asleep right there holding Dib. Though Dwicky fought hard against it, he let Dib have his arms free a little longer.

Dib held Dwicky tighter as the silence crept on, his hand slowing down over time only to fall to the back of the man's neck and stay there. He kept his eyes open for a long time, refusing to close them, and stared into the darkness towards the wall instead. After awhile the calm he felt refused to let him keep them open anymore, and he nuzzled his face against Dwicky's hair a bit as he closed his eyes. There was no real fear as he gave into sleep, and it didn't take long for his breathing to even out, his grip on the other never growing slack.

Dwicky opened his eyes to the sound of soft, warm breath on his hair. The hand at the boy's back eventually slowed to a stop. Though his eyes were open, his mind was still dozing; true coherency hadn't blessed him yet. He exhaled, taking in the scent of skin. "Leave him alone now." Dwicky barely whispered, but not to Dib, a deeper, meaner part that he would never see nor hear. "You can't have him. I care about him. I really do." His arms kept tight around Dib possessively. "Just.. go." Dwicky squeezed his eyes shut, burying his face against the crook of Dib's neck.


	7. Sessions 7

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Lint

Chapter 07

Bright. Painfully bright lights flicked on without warning to christen the cheery new morning of the sanitarium, letting those who would never see the light of day know that it was indeed morning.  
Their newest invited 'member' didn't have the luck of being used to such iridescent wake up calls. Dwicky's eyes snapped open, which was the worst he could do. His pupils constricted to tight pin pricks and all he could do was clap a hand over his eyes to save himself from the already painful damage.

"Ow. I'm blind." he moaned a low gripe, wanting more than anything to just roll over and tug blankets over his head to such a florescent morn.

Unfortunately, he wasn't at home, and as he rolled over, he almost crushed his cell block bed companion. Dwicky gave a small start; instantly he recalled where he was, and why. He'd done the boy's sleeves back up in his sleep, laying them both down on the bed for a less bodily stressing sleep.

The man stared a bit distantly at Dib, as if to wake up to the boy's image wasn't real. Dwicky glanced to the door, now able to see it (albeit squinting through the light); no one was coming just yet. He turned his eyes back to Dib. With a small, groggy smile, he drew a hand up and gently ran it against the boy's bottom lip.

Unlike the last time Dib had been asleep, there were no signs that the boy was having any sort of nightmares at all. His breathing was simple and even, and there were no frightful noises coming from him. The feeling of touch against his lip had him make a small bit of movement as his tongue darted out to catch whatever it was. It gave a small lick to whatever was there before moving back inside his mouth. No other real signs of movement came from him after that.

Dwicky gave a silent chuckle, finding it horribly adorable. He bit his lip, trying not to make a horribly girlish sound because of it.

His finger moved, brushing the corner of the boy's lips. It was good to see Dib had slept through the entire night without any disturbance. Dwicky felt a little bad to wake up the boy's first peaceful sleep in years. But if he didn't do it, the orderlies would.

Dwicky ran a hand against Dib's cheek, and let it fall back down his jaw. He hoped Dib wouldn't leap back with a terrified scream like the last time he woke him up. Dwicky leaned forward and softly kissed Dib's forehead, then moved back on the bed so he wouldn't startle the boy.

A small, quiet sound came from Dib at the touches across his skin, and it was the feel of lips against his forehead that finally had him barely opening his eyes. The sudden light in the room caused him to squint, and he tried to bury his face in the mattress with little to no success as a small whimper escaped him. For a few seconds he stayed like that, until he gave in and turned his head away from the fabric. He blinked his eyes a few times, trying to get everything to come into focus as best he could, considering. Seeing the figure next to him had a surprised expression come over his face for a quick second. "I actually slept..." The words were quiet when they were spoken, and it was easy to tell Dib was still a bit groggy, but the information shocked even himself.

Dwicky couldn't help the wide grin, even if he wanted to. "I know." He skooched forward, leaning in to greet Dib to the waking world with a soft lingering kiss. He kept his head close, still grinning as he ran a few fingers under the boy's lips. He was truly happy for Dib. It was one great battle won. Dwicky could only grin wider, unable to keep his good cheer in as he stole another, slow and endearingly. When he broke it, he kept his forehead nuzzled to Dib's. "How're you feeling?" he murmured quietly, so close; wishing they were another three words he could whisper against the boy's skin.

The kisses had Dib's mind completely coming to, and, slowly, a small smile came to his lips as he kept his eyes on Dwicky and the last kiss was broken. The small question had a thoughtful expression come over his face a quick moment before he was finally able to answer. "I feel okay. Which is strange. I usually feel so drained in the morning. I usually don't feel this good at all." His smile grew a bit. "I didn't have any nightmares either. I didn't see what I usually see. The monsters weren't there at all. They all left me alone this time."

"Good." Dwicky closed his eyes a moment to smile more. "That's definitely good. That's the best news to wake up to." Badly did he want to just reach over and tightly tug the boy to him. But from the busy sounds outside, in the halls of early morning medicines and breakfast being served, it wasn't the best of things to do right now. Disappointing, but Dwicky didn't let his smile falter. "Did you have any dreams?" he went on in a cheerful tone.

A nervous look came over Dib's face and he quickly averted his eyes at the question. "Yes..." For so long he stayed silent, and it seemed as if he would leave it at that. He fidgeted a bit, just noticing that he was, once again, tied up in the jacket, but for once he didn't start to struggle. He only kept quiet for a few more moments until he spoke up once more, still refusing to meet Dwicky's eyes. "I dreamt that I was looking at the stars, but I wasn't alone. I was with you. It was just like I wanted it to be..."

Dwicky didn't speak, the smile kept on his lips. He made a warm, touched sort of 'heh'ed exhale. "Sounds nice. I'll make it true someday." He finished quietly. "Someday soon." The man tried to meet Dib's eyes, but the boy still kept them averted. Dwicky went back to his outgoing, cheery business disposition "Dream about anything else?"

Dib still continued to keep his gaze away from Dwicky, but it was easy to tell that a sudden nervous look came over his face at the question. He tried his best to shake his head in response before actually answering, his voice was suddenly shy and quiet. "No, I didn't..."

That had an unsure look coming from Dwicky. He raised a slight brow. It wasn't like Dib to not keep eye contact; the boy was always constantly trying to look at his face, hungry to read his expressions and eyes. "You sure? You don't sound too sure."

Dib started to fidget against the jacket that held him, but not in any way to try and get the heavy material off. Dwicky's gaze caused him to become a bit more nervous and after a few moments, he was stuttering before any coherent words came from his mouth. "If I thought about the things we do, like all the times you kiss me. If I thought about all of that, dreamt about that, is that bad?" He still kept his eyes down after he asked the small questions.

Dwicky blinked, glancing quickly to the side, before back at Dib. "Nnnooo." he drew out the word unsurely. "No, it's not bad. If you like it, it's only natural you'd dream about it." Dwicky cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck, feeling the growing heat rising to his cheeks. He tried to keep his voice casual and nice. "I guess that's also what you dreamed?"

Dib gave a slow, small nod and finally lifted his eyes. His expression was still a bit fearful, as if at any moment he would get yelled at. "Yeah..." His eyes watched Dwicky's face for a bit before dropping back down again to gaze at the mattress. "I really liked it. I mean, I like it when it's not an actual dream, but even in the dream it felt real. It felt good too. Even better, actually. I still felt really calm too and there was nothing hurting me." He tried to bury his face into the mattress a bit to hide away his embarrassment. "That's it..."

"Better, huh?" Both of Dwicky's brows rose up; way up. Then it dawned on him and all the colour immediately washed over his face. "_Oh_." He gave a cough into a hand and sat up, rubbing the back of his neck, a little flustered. He laughed nervously and was embarrassed, but tried to move on despite. "Well, I'm glad you slept good and hard--" Dwicky's eyes snapped open and he quickly waved his hands, his cheeks growing hotter. "I mean had a full night's sleep." He cleared his throat into a hand. "Wet dreams-- I mean good dreams. Yes. Yes, I said meant that. Er- I said that. Er." Dwicky hung his head, defeated. "Damnit. Transparent again." His head snapped up. "I said that out loud, didn't I?" He clapped a hand over his face, shaking his head.

Dib let his face peek out from where it was buried just so he could look at Dwicky, though it was hard considering the man had his hand covering his face. "Yeah, you did." For a few moments he continued to lay there before finally shifting around so that he was able to sit up, moving around 'til he was sitting right in front of the other. He titled his head to the side, hoping that would help him get a better look at the other's expression, but it didn't, and a small frustrated noise came from him. "You're not mad, are you?"

"Hmm. No." Dwicky made a few noises before letting his hand fall back down. But that didn't save Dib. The boy was suddenly snatched from the bed and into Dwicky's lap as the man gathered him up in his arms to be thoroughly nuzzled. "But Dib makes it better." He payed no mind to caution as he nuzzled his face against the boy's neck, tickling the skin with lips and teeth. "Hm. Even better, huh? Really?" He raised a brow again with a slight smirk; he just couldn't let it go.

A small, surprised noise escaped Dib at the sudden change of position, but it slowly died down at the attention Dwicky gave him. Tiny, pleased sounds came from his lips instead. The questions that were asked of him had the beginnings of a blush creep across his cheeks, and once again he tried his best to avert his eyes, and instead look towards the wall as he answered. "Yes, a lot better. I mean, I like this, but the dream felt really good too." He quickly stopped speaking and instead made a small, shy sound.

Dwicky gave a small sigh. "Bested by a dream." He noted nearing footsteps and was forced to retract his tight embrace about the boy. He set the boy next to him on the bed. "Beaten by dream Dwicky." He drew fingers across Dib's cheek, giving the other a brief kiss. "Tough competition." he murmured against the boy's cheek before leaning back. The man grinned, drawing his hand back to his lap just as a heavy set nurse took it in herself to walk in.

A weak protest left Dib's mouth as he was moved, but it died away when he heard the door open. He gave one last glance to Dwicky before moving his eyes to the exit. The small blush was still on his cheeks, despite how hard he tried not to think about all he had told the other. Instead, he buried his face down into the collar of the jacket as best he could while looking at the nurse that had invaded his room.

The nurse walked in carrying two small paper cups, one with water, and one with pills. She walked over to Dib, not glancing at Dwicky at all. She wanted to get her rounds over as quick as possible. "You know the drill, hun. Now, open your mouth." The woman poised the cup of pills at Dib's mouth with her chubby hand. "_All _of them; like last time."

Dib backed up a bit at first, not finding the idea of swallowing the pills at all enjoyable. For a long time he kept his mouth shut, even with the cup near it, and quickly turned his head to the side, his eyes were on the wall instead of the woman in front of him. His voice came out determined, but at the same time there was still the bit of fear there that always lingered. "I don't want to."

The nurse didn't take kindly to that, and sighed tiredly, not in the mood for another bought of Dib's renowned antics. "It doesn't matter if you want to or not. You will take them."

Dwicky stared a moment, not wanting to get involved, but the situation had him piping up. "C'mon Dib." He touched the boy's shoulder, continuing with soft cheer. "You know it's important, so you get better."

Dib quickly moved his eyes to Dwicky, the stubborn look on his own face slowly disappeared at the man's words. After a few seconds he turned his eyes back to the nurse. His eyes narrowed, refusing to give her a kind look, but he opened his mouth all the same to accept the pills and water.

"Finally." The nurse dumped the few pills in Dib's mouth, chasing them with the other cup of water. Crumpling either in her thick hands, she tucked them away in her pockets. She stood there, crossing her arms with a horribly stern look on her saggy, mean face, waiting for Dib to swallow. "Swallow it _all_."

Dib did his best to glare at the nurse before actually swallowing the pills with what little water he was given. He flinched a bit when one of the pills when down hard, but eased up after and opened his eyes. Once they were all down, he opened his mouth wide to show off to the nurse just before sticking his tongue out at her in a childish manner.

The woman gave a narrow eyed glare that would have cut Dib's tongue straight from his mouth if it could. Satisfied with what she came for, the nurse gave a grunt before turning and leaving. She paused at the door, her tired gaze falling on Dwicky. "You going to leave now, sir?"

Dwicky blinked before shaking his head and waving his hands lightly. "Er- No, not yet."

The Nurse shrugged, either way she didn't care, she was done here. She left immediately, the door slamming and locking behind her.

Dib kept his eyes on the door even after it had closed, his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth. He stayed that way for a few more moments until finally he turned his attention back to Dwicky and let his tongue move back inside his mouth so he could speak. "You didn't want to leave yet?" He scooted closer to the other while turning a bit to he could better face the man. "Why not?" Although he asked, it was obvious he was alright with Dwicky staying.

Dwicky looked back at Dib, busying his hand while smoothing out his own bed mussed hair with little success. "I'm in no hurry. It has to be at least the crack of dawn," he glanced at the door "I suppose I have a little more time. Besides." Dwicky lowered his hand, smoothing his goatee down, and giving Dib a thoughtful glance. "I'm off work today, now I'm just a visitor." He couldn't help the slow, wide smile.

Those last words had Dib giving a smile of his own. He moved closer to Dwicky, until he was almost nose to nose with the man. His words easily felt against the other's lips. "If you're just my visitor, can I still do this?" Without even waiting for any sort of response, Dib closed what small gap there was between them to press his lips against Dwicky's own. All the inexperience he had shown the first time he tried was slowly leaving and this one kiss was no exception.

"Mmmf." Dwicky returned the kiss with gentle intent, enjoying Dib's forwardness very much. He parted their lips a moment to speak. "I dunno. Your counselor might get jealous." Dwicky's hand reached out to rest on Dib's hip, tugging the boy just a little closer on the second kiss. "But what he doesn't know..." he murmured against Dib's lips with a playful grin.

Dib gave a small laugh against Dwicky's lips before pressing his own more firmly to the other's once more. He couldn't help the muffled noises that came from him, and truthfully, he wasn't trying to stop them. His eyes easily slipped all the way closed before he let out another small noise that was more nervous than pleased. For a few seconds he just kept his lips pressed against Dwicky's until, carefully, his tongue snuck out to lick at the other's lips.

Dwicky made a soft, surprised noise, not expecting such boldness the second time around. But the sound quickly turned into a low, stifled, longing sound. Fingers ran through Dib's hair and to the back of the boy's head, pulling it just that much nearer as he parted his own lips to slip his tongue out to run against Dib's. Dwicky gave a needy sound in his throat, coaxing the boy to continue.

At first, Dib's body tensed up at the touches against his hair, but when Dwicky pulled him closer he immediately calmed down. Wetness against his own tongue caused his eyes to open halfway before he let them close once again. He licked his tongue along Dwicky's before pushing it further inside the man's mouth, running it against teeth and tongue alike, while still pressing hard into the kiss.

Dwicky's moan was muffled against Dib's lips as he met the other's tongue, greedily taking it in his mouth. Thoroughly, he captured Dib's mouth, wanting to taste more. His fingers curled, grasping the boy's hair as his other hand pulled Dib flush against him in one movement, his arm keeping him close. His tongue ran against Dib's lips, coaxing them open with a stifled, throaty sound.

Dib easily gave in and pressed even closer to Dwicky. His own noises got a bit louder despite the lips that kept them muffled and quiet. He made no real protest to having the other's tongue invade his mouth, and only playfully licked at the roof of Dwicky's mouth.

After a few seconds, Dib finally pulled away, needing to breathe, keeping his eyes on the man's lips and the thin, wet trail that still connected his own to them. It didn't stay there for long as he darted his tongue back out to lick up the string, flicking his tongue against Dwicky's goatee as he did so. He kept his eyes on the man's own the entire time.

Dwicky kept his heavy lidded gaze on Dib's tongue the entire time. A deep, husky moan left him as he watched Dib, his own eyes fluttering closed for a moment as his mind went completely else where, almost blanking out completely. "Damnit Dib." He could barely find the coherency, and breath, to speak as he opened his eyes a crack. His lax fingers tightened in the boy's hair and straitjacket. He gripped the fabric tightly.

The word once again caused Dib to blink a few times before a slow, lazy grin spread on his face. For once it was not at all demented, just simply playful. Even with the strong grip Dwicky had on his hair, he easily leaned forward once more to press a soft kiss against the man's bottom lip. Though the contact didn't stay soft for long, and soon Dib's attentions became eager as he started to suck lightly.

Dwicky let his eyes shift shut a moment, pressing back against Dib's mouth, and kissing already wet lips. He ran his tongue against the boy's top lip, kissing it firmly. He relinquished one hand from Dib's hair to his jaw, forcing the boy's head up to pull his bottom lip from the boy's mouth to kiss him again more fiercely.

Before Dib could respond, Dwicky grasped the boy's restraint coat, and threw Dib on his back on the bed, pinning him atop. Dwicky didn't think twice about stopping, using the boy's surprise to invade his mouth more heatedly.

Dib's eyes snapped open when he was thrown back onto the bed and a small, surprised sound came from him. Before he could even try to struggle, Dwicky was already on top of him and his mouth was over his own. Such a feeling had Dib calm down from his sudden surprise. Completely giving into the intense kiss, he ran his tongue roughly against Dwicky's own. He gave small, muffled whimpers at his bonds once more, wanting to be free, but for the moment he just gave in to what he had and pressed up closer to the other.

It was hard enough to keep quiet with Dib squirming so much underneath him. It was even harder to pull from Dib's lips; those wet, bruised lips were hard to keep from giving new, needy kiss.Somehow, Dwicky managed to pull his head up, panting heavily. Keeping Dib's shoulder pinned with one hand, he drew up his other to wipe excess wet at the corner of his lips with the back of his hand. "Wow. Tha..-that must have been _some_ dream." Waking up, he hadn't expected _this _ to happen first thing in the morning.

With a husky, breathless chuckle, Dwicky slid down Dib's body, straddling the boy's legs. He lowered his hand to pin down the boy's frisky hips while his other still held Dib's shoulder.

Dib gave a small, but loud whine when Dwicky pulled away, and it only got louder when his body was pinned down. He tried to struggle a bit more before finally giving up with a small pout, which he sent the man's way. He didn't stay upset for long though, and the small grin from before came back to his face as Dwicky's words finally came to him. "It was. I really, really liked it. I want it to happen again."

Dwicky's hand on the boy's hip brushed along his side, slipping under the bottom of the coat for a moment to smooth against skin near the pant's waist line. "Oh?" Dwicky's brows rose and he tilted his head with devious curiosity. His hand slunk higher under the jacket, circling around the boy's belly button and down the jut of bony hip bone. "Anything specific I should know?" that usual counseling tone couldn't help but creep into his suggestive tone. Without waiting for an answer, his hand drew from under the coat. Hooking a thumb under the hem, Dwicky tugged the bottom up, exposing Dib's pale stomach. Still holding the coat, he softly thumbed the pale skin just below Dib's ribs.

Small sounds once again came from Dib's mouth, but they were much softer noises. His eyes slipped halfway closed at each touch that was placed across usually well hidden skin. The question Dwicky had asked him had the small tiny blush he tried to hide earlier come back, but he didn't avert his eyes like he had before. Instead, he kept them on the man as he stuttered a bit before actually answering. "You kept touching me, just like you are now, but in different places. It all felt really good though. I didn't want it to stop. I really liked it."

Dwicky dipped his head a bit, paying more attention to the boy's pale skin than anything else at that moment. "Different places?" he mindlessly echoed. Then it immediately dawned on him as he stared at Dib's lower body. "_Oh_." His eyes flicked up quickly to boy's blushing face. "Wow._Wow_." The back of Dwicky's neck grew warm again. "You waste no time, do you?" Dwicky chuckled a little lewdly, but quickly cleared his throat; _ah, teenagers_. He continued to dip his head, placing a slow kissing just above Dib's belly button.

Dib's stomach clenched at the bit of contact before slowly relaxing. He gave another small noise that turned into a sigh before he spoke up in a quiet voice. "It's okay, right? You said you weren't mad, so it's okay that I might dream about that stuff, right?" He started to fidget a bit inside the sleeves as best he could, the nervous feeling from before was slowly coming back. "I couldn't help it, and I didn't want to."

Dwicky paused in mid-kiss, his gaze flicking back up to Dib. "S-sure." he spoke against the flat of Dib's stomach. "You can't control what you dream. I suppose I'm just surprised to hear you liked me _that _ much." He grinned a little, pressing a small kiss near the boy's hip, above the waist of his pants. He warmed the skin that he previously kissed as he spoke on. "It's flattering, really." Dwicky hadn't expected that of Dib; ... then again.

The man padded a few more slow kisses against the exposed skin, making the boy squirm by brushing his lips over flesh that had always been hidden and untouched. He slipped his tongue from his mouth, drawing a slow, lazy line from Dib's abdomen and up along the boy's stomach. Dwicky pulled his gaze up, keeping his eyes on Dib as he drew his head back down to softly blow cool air on the wet trail down.

The kisses alone had Dib trying to squirm more than he had before, despite the fact Dwicky tried to hold him down. It was the feel of air on wet skin which did him in completely and a small, low moan from his lips. His half lidded gaze fell completely closed as he finally gave up in his struggles and simply allowed the man to do as he pleased, not that he was complaining in the first place. He tried his best to speak up but it didn't work, and all he could do was let another sound escape him for the moment.

Dwicky grinned widely at Dib's sounds and ceasing of struggles. He kissed the damp skin softly before sliding his tongue across the boy's lower stomach. His hand slid from holding the gathered jacket to run down the boy's side to his hip, tugging down to reveal just a little more hip and draw his tongue across. With a wider grin, Dwicky ended the trail with a flick of tongue, slipping it back in and pursing his lips to follow the damp design with a cool blow of air.

Dib gave out a tiny whine that only turned into another moan. His cheeks still had a small blush covering them and became even more heated, but he didn't seem to notice at all, considering what Dwicky was doing to him. After a few seconds his teeth moved out to bite at his bottom lip and try to quiet himself, but it only muffled the sounds instead and made them sound worse than they already were.

Dwicky's tongue ended in a new design and he kissed the skin slowly before he followed down the arches of damp skin with new, cool breath. He watched Dib chew at his lip, listening to each elicited sound and found it irresistible not to move from the boy's pale stomach and up to the boy's head again. He pulled the lip that Dib had tried to muffle himself with, with his own teeth, sucking on it a moment before kissing it flush with the rest of Dib's mouth, muffling a moan of his own. Nails drew lightly across Dib's stomach, fingers running slickly across the goose pimpled skin.

Dib eagerly responded to the kiss, his sounds muffled along with Dwicky's. Without even waiting for the other, he licked at the man's lips while giving a small whimper. The contact that he still felt on his stomach had that part of his body tensing at the sensations that it caused, and as hard as he tried, Dib couldn't help but squirm a tiny bit.

Dwicky deepened the kiss, his tongue stealing into Dib's mouth, thoroughly running against the other's tongue and teeth. Then in the heat of a groan, something horrible dawned on him. With an upset noise, not wanting to part from Dib's mouth, Dwicky pulled away. Sucking in a panted breath, he licked his lips with a small whimper and touched his mouth worriedly with a hand as he stared agape at the wall. "What am I doing." he muttered under his breath and bopped himself on the head. "I can't leave marks. Marks would raise suspicion." Dwicky stared at Dib's quite disheveled state. "Damnit." he hung his head defeated.

Dib let out his own disappointed noise when Dwicky pulled away, and continued to make more soft sounds, hoping that would make the other continue. When it didn't, he gave a small pout instead as he looked up at the man. His tongue darted out for a quick second before he spoke, his voice quiet and upset. "Why did you stop? Who cares about marks? I just want you to keep going. Please..." The last part came out as a whine, but Dib really didn't care.

Dwicky stopped rubbing his face to look at Dib with a weak sort of smile. "Stop being so irresistible." The noises Dib was making was far too lethal to his resistance; what little he had. He unrolled his sleeve to gently wipe away the saliva on the boy's stomach. Tugging down the jacket, and straightening it out to an obsessive degree. It kept him preoccupied, belating temptation a moment longer; and he didn't know how to exactly explain it to Dib. "W-we... have to be careful Dib." he changed a glance to the boy as he continued with the jacket. "Do you understand why?" Dwicky had to hope that Dib was smarter than he was letting on, that some of the boy's mind still worked beyond the coma of years and years of needless pills.

Dib stared at Dwicky for a few seconds more with a disappointed look still on his face. Even as the man touched his stomach, he didn't move an inch. He only blinked his eyes at the question a few times before letting out a low noise and looking away to the wall. It took him a few moments to finally speak up, the sudden, fearful tone back in his voice. "If not then they'll take you away from me. I'll never get to see you again." As much as he tried not to believe it, or think about it, the fact was being forced on him and he hated it.

Dib felt a soft, apologetic kiss on his cheek. "I'm sorry." Dwicky spoke in quiet honesty as he rested his cheek on the boy's shoulder, leaning overtop of Dib's crossed arms. "It'll just take some time," He rubbed Dib's arm trying to assure the boy, cuddling closer "before this will be alright."

Dib glanced at Dwicky out the corner of his eyes once again, staying silent for a few minutes. The words the man said had a small frown forming on his face and when he finally spoke, his tone was sad, the fear still there as well. "Does that mean you don't want to do this anymore? That you just want to be my counselor?"

Dwicky went silent, unable to answer right away. He pressed his lips and nose against the rough fabric of the coat, sadly thinking Dib's words over thoroughly. His hand continued to rub Dib's arm, stopping only to slip his arms partly around the boy and half hug him.

Finally, Dwicky turned his head to speak, he opened his mouth._ 'Maybe that would be for the best._' But he couldn't make the words come out. He didn't want to. He wanted to be that vague, aforementioned 'other' that Dib spoke of in that decisive question. But Dwicky didn't know how to say it, he wasn't trained for _this _ field.

Dwicky let out a long sigh, shutting his eyes a moment. "I mean... let's just be careful. Okay? There's no rush." Complications, Dib didn't need complications where he was. To prove his words Dwicky raised his head up to give a small kiss to the corner of the boy's abused lips.

The words and small kiss had the frown disappearing from Dib's face, and his worries left him as well. A slow smile came over his face to replace the feared expression that had been there, and slowly, he tried to cuddle closer to Dwicky as he was held. "Alright, but we can still do things, right? We don't really have to stop everything, do we?" His smile slowly faded and he lowered his eyes a bit as he became nervous. "I mean, I know we have to be careful, but no one came in now and we were fine."

Dwicky moved to hold the boy closer and tighter. "We just have to be discreet." He nuzzled the bridge of his nose against Dib's jaw line. "Okay?" His voice fell quieter, and shook a little with worry. "Just until you get out of here." He turned his head to lay a brief kiss to Dib's throat. "I'll take care of everything otherwise. So don't worry." Even though Dwicky voiced assurance, he gripped Dib's jacket anxiously.

Dib nodded his head just a bit at the words, but his eyes narrowed at the sudden grip he felt on the jacket that held his arms in place. He gave a soft, quiet sound before he nuzzled his face against Dwicky's hair. For a few moments he stayed like that, until he turned his head to the side and spoke up once more, trying not to sound as worried. "Are you sure?"

"I am." Dwicky answered quietly. "I won't let you down." He abhorred having to move, it was most likely pretty well into the morning. Unlike any other visitor, he had reports to fill in and doctors to speak to, nothing particularly exciting that Dwicky wanted to get to right away. His mood had fallen with the adrenaline, and all he wanted to do for the next while was exactly what he was doing. Two days without this, it felt like some horrible teenage drama; with the sad mood to boot.

The answer seemed to satisfy Dib enough because he went right back to nuzzling Dwicky's hair once more. He kept completely quiet after that, for once not minding the silence in the room and forgetting the worry that had just passed through his mind. The only real sound that came from him was a soft sigh that could be felt against the top of the man's head.

"You've improved a lot." Dwicky idly commented, quietly breaking the silence. He tried not to grin like a loon after saying it, but he really couldn't help it.

The words had Dib lifting his head and blinking his eyes a few times. He stayed silent for a few seconds longer, trying to make sure he heard correctly, before a small shy smile made its way onto his face. "It's only because you've been here. I'd still be in my old room yelling about Zim if you hadn't showed up." He moved his eyes to the wall before going on. "Everything you've done has helped me a lot. I'm really glad you came back for me."

Dwicky turned his head to look at Dib with a sly sort of expression. "Everything? Including licking you stomach?" He couldn't help the grin and slight laugh, before a more serious expression settled on him. "Yea, I'm glad to be back too." He was happy to have the old Dib back, to talk like this. He idly stroked Dib's cheek with a finger.

Dib blushed just a bit at the teasing, but easily settled down at the soft touch on his cheek. His eyes moved back to Dwicky's face and for a few moments he stared at the other until another small sigh came from him. "I know you have to go, but I still don't want you to. I want you to stay just like this. You shouldn't have to leave me. It's not fair." He began to pout once more while his eyes closed halfway.

Dwicky smiled a little sadly. He then pushed himself up on his arms to hang over Dib and press a small, apologetic kiss to those pouty lips; one for the horrible teasing, a second, softer one for having to go, and a third, much slower, endearing one. He didn't pull away after, leaving his lips rested against Dib's, as well as his forehead against the other. "I'm just a phone call away." he whispered.

Dib gave a small sound after each kiss. His eyes closed for a few seconds and only opened when he felt Dwicky speak against his lips. The words had him pouting a bit more and he gave a small whine. "I can't use a phone." The words were said in a small voice, despite how obvious they were, and Dib struggled just a bit against his bonds, as if to prove his point.

"I'll tell the doctors that I told you that you could call me if needed. But use the privilege sparingly. Only if you really, really, _really _ need to. Understand?" Dwicky strained the importance of it in his voice, though gently brushed a finger against Dib's hair. "I want to see you too, but only call if it truly is an emergency. You'll be strong, I know it." He pressed his lips slightly against Dib's. "I believe in you.

The last sentence had Dib's smile returning and he easily nodded his head. "I understand. I'll only call you if it's really important, or if I start to get really scared." The small bit of struggling he had been doing slowly ceased and he calmed down once more. "I'll be okay though. It's been so quiet. They might actually leave me alone when you're gone. Even if they don't though, I'll do my best to ignore them. It won't be like last time. I promise."

Dwicky smiled against Dib's, tugging the boy closer under him with a pleased noise. "You'll do great." He snuggled closer against the small body. "I know you'll do great." His smile grew wider, masking the reluctance, knowing the inevitable was soon, and that he had to leave.

Dib cuddled close as he was pulled against Dwicky, laying his head under the man's chin. It felt good to have Dwicky believe in him again. To have the words said once more. Especially considering the situation he had gotten himself into. A small pleased noise that he didn't even try to stop came from him, wanting to stay just the way he was for so long.

It wasn't long before Dwicky spoke up again. He segued it first by resting his lips on Dib's forehead. There he whispered "I have to go now. Be good."

Dib let out a whine at the words, but stopped the noise just as quickly, knowing that Dwicky really did have to go. Instead, a sad look came over his face as he nodded his head in response, his voice still quiet, even in the large room. "I'll miss you..."

Dwicky slowly pushed himself to sit up, still straddling the boy as he looked down at him. "I'll miss you too," he ran a few fingers across the boy's abused lips, still wet, and tempting to stay and bruise them worse. "Dib." But he couldn't. Dwicky got off the boy, stepping beside the bed on slightly shaky legs. He retracted his hand, and managed to smile somehow. "I'll see you bright and early Monday." He back stepped towards the door.

Once Dwicky was off the bed, instead of trying to sit up, Dib rolled over onto his stomach and arms to watch the man leave. He gave a small nod at the other's words, but with each step back the man took, a small frown came over his lips. His teeth moved out of his mouth to worry at his bottom lip, much like they always did, to try and hide the frown, but the expression was clear on his face either way.

"Be good, okay." Dwicky spoke again when he stood in front of the door. He turned a little to stick his arm through the barred window and snapped his fingers to gain the guard's attention. "Hey! Open the door please." The door soon opened with a loud click of locks. Dwicky stood there a moment, though the door remained open for him to exit, the hall back dropping him there. He gave a small wave and an equally small smile. "Bye, Dib."

Dib quickly made a move to finally sit up, keeping his eyes on Dwicky the entire time. He fidgeted a bit beneath the jacket, wishing that he could actually wave back, but all he could do was once again nod his head in response. No matter what, the small frown not once left his face. "Bye, Dwicky..."

The man stepped back behind the thresh hold of the room into the hall. His own small, smile widened in hopes that it would get Dib to return it. But the guard couldn't be bothered with pleasantries. The door slammed shut, severing either of them, save for the small barred window which still gave a small view. Dwicky's smile faltered some, and with a goodbye raise of hand again, he finally turned and parted from Dib's first, tiny square view of the outside world that he'd had in over three years, leaving nothing but the sight of a dirty empty hall.


	8. Sessions 8

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** PG 13  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
** Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Lint

Chapter 08 

The day was nothing close to mediocre. Birds, blue skies, trees and rolled out lawns, spoke of good cheer to the sunny afternoon. It did little to assuage the nervousness of that whom stood in front of the great Professor Membrane household. Standing on the porch and having a staring contest with the welcome mat, it was pointless procrastination, and Dwicky scolded himself for being so silly. He'd spoken to the Professor before. He was a civil and logical man. He was a scientist after all.

Breaking his wide eyed contact with the door mat, giving the mat the win, Dwicky looked to the door. He was going to do this. It was nothing worse than talking to piranha-mouthed parents about their troubled teens in his old occupation at Skool. Yes, yes, he could do this.  
Putting on his widest, most perfect of optimistic smiles, Dwicky raised his hand and gave a hearty press to the door bell.

It took a long while before any sort of noises came from the other side of the door; a few muffled shouts, one that would have sounded less than pleased, had it not been so muffled by the door. Finally, there was a soft clicking as locks were undone, annoying the person on the other side even further. After a small, quick twist of the knob, the door finally opened a crack to allow a head to peek out, but it wasn't at all Membrane. Instead, the person on the other side was much younger, and female, with purple hair done up in pigtails. The cute appearance didn't help the fact that she was trying to glare a hole straight through the man. "What?"

Dwicky was taken aback by such a menacing expression from such a young individual. Children _were _ creepy, creepy creatures.

But it didn't stop Dwicky's collected disposition one bit. He simply gave the girl a pleasant smile and spoke calm and business like, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "Is your father home? I'd like to speak with him."

If anything, the girl at the door gave the man an even harder stare, as if the sound of his voice grated on her every last nerve. She continued to stand at the door for a few more seconds until she finally spoke once more, in the same charming manner. "Yeah..." After the single word left her mouth, she opened the door wider to let the other in. She stepped back just a bit to stand next to the door, but kept her eyes on the man the entire time.

Dwicky gave a wider smile, despite the giant hole the girl was now mentally drilling into his face, as he stepped into the house. He gave a quick glance around, a small habit of his; taking the observation of the living environment of a person and then guessing what type lifestyle they lived. It was a work habit. It was definitely _Professor Membrane _ orientated.

In the living room, the TV was on some mindless music video station. On the couch, another girl sat with sharp violaceous hair that hung over one eye. The hair colour and equally unimpressed look of murderous intent, he got from her could have Dwicky guessing they were either friends, or sisters; either way, together, he didn't want to be in the same room with them for longer than he had to.

There was a loud noise as the door slammed closed rather hard immediately after Dwicky walked in the house. The girl stood right where she was for a few seconds longer, continuing to stare until she gave a small, aggravated sound. With slow steps, she finally walked forward, stopping only when she was standing in front of the man. One of her eyes barely opened, the annoyance still clear on her face as she stared up at the other. "What do you need with dad? He's not gonna talk to you if it's not important, ya know?" Despite her words, it was clear by her tone that she could have cared less.

Dwicky was slightly taken aback by the bouncer-esque qualities the girl was giving him. But he supposed it was all well in due considering who her father was. That said, he could only guess the girl in front of him was 'Gaz'. He'd never met her in person, and he'd only seen a few pictures of her, much younger though. The other girl then had to be a friend (Dib didn't have two sisters; the boy was traumatized enough as is).

He gave the girl a still pleasant smile. "It's regarding your brother, Dib."

The girl on the couch threw up a dismissive, fingered hand. "Not important then!" She gave a mean, obnoxious, cackled giggle.

Gaz's stare became even more hateful at the name. Her eyes returned to small slits and just as she was about to open her mouth and speak, the figure on the couch spoke for her. Gaz quickly turned her heated stare toward the other person in the room, her words still just as harsh. "Thank you for that more than obvious statement, Tak. You can shut up now." Her eyes moved back to Dwicky. "I doubt Dad's gonna wanna hear about Dib's moments in the nut house. None of us do."

Dwicky eyed Tak with an unimpressed look himself before looking back down to Gaz. "It's good news, actually. He's doing quite well. He's improved greatly, and I'm sure he'll be coming home soon." He gave the girl an optimistic smile. "I'm sure you'd like that, hm? To have your older brother back home."

Despite Gaz's words, Tak had been giggling into her hand. At Dwicky's statement, she burst out with hilarious laughter, collapsing back onto the seat of the couch, her boots kicking with her rolls of cackles.

Gaz stared at Dwicky with a blank look, as if the man had grown another head. Even Tak's loud laughter in the background didn't seem to faze her as she continued to stand there in front of the man. After a few moments, though, she finally shook her head and looked away with a sneer. "That's gotta be a joke." She glanced back at Dwicky from the corner of her eyes and seeing that it indeed wasn't, her expression grew worse. "Not likely. I enjoy the peace and quiet, thank you very much. The longer he's away, the better."

Tak attempted to climb up the back of the couch to sit up again, still giggling like mad. When she too saw Dwicky's serious expression over it she fell back down, more laughter escaping her. She grabbed a pillow to muffle her cackling, but still snorted laughter could be heard.

Dwicky gave a slight exasperated exhale, but pulled the smile back on for the girl in front of him; he'd let it slide for now. "So, where is your father?"

Gaz only rolled her eyes at the question, and without a word, she turned her back to Dwicky. She started to walk away from the man, not really caring if he followed or not, knowing he more than likely would anyway. Her feet led her out of the living room and down a hall to the right where just a few feet in, a small flight of stairs lay. Gaz stopped next to the stairs, letting her eyes travel down to the door that was at the bottom. "You want him? Go bug him yourself."

Dwicky stood beside Gaz, looking down at the entrance; foreboding, in a scientific way. He looked at Gaz with raised eyebrows before looking back down. "Yea. Thanks." It may have sounded genuine, but it was mostly sarcastic.

Gritting his teeth, Dwicky took a careful step down, almost flinching when he stood on the first step. He blinked; well, no death yet. He glanced back to Gaz, but the girl had already taken it in herself to abandon him to his own. So Dwicky turned back, and with an inhale of breath, continued his descent down into Professor Membrane's lab.

Past the door, and down the stairs, lay a completely different room compared to the other level of the house. A few tables lined each wall and held small shelves with assorted vials and beakers. Each glass container had a different colored liquid that was much too fluorescent. Different tools lay along each table as well, just for easy access later on. That wasn't all that was in the large room, some small monitors also hung from different places on the walls, each showing different angles in some unknown location. In the middle of it all, in the center of the room, was a large console which was occupied, at that moment, by Membrane himself, who, at the moment, had his back turned to the door. There were small sparks coming from the console, accompanied by a small groaning sound from whatever he was working on.

Dwicky stood near the door wide eyed and unsure. He gaped at things here, and he gaped at things there. He stared at most everything, including Membrane himself. He waited a moment for the man to finish, but as minutes ticked, it seemed Membrane was oblivious to anything but, and wasn't going to stop (for even the apocalypse) anytime soon.

With a little forceful courage, Dwicky rose a weak fist and cleared his throat, meaning to get the other man's attention, though as delicately as he could "E-excuse me, Professor Membrane?" he spoke as politely as he could.

Those simple words were enough to grab the man's attention, and although Membrane didn't dare put down what he was working on, he did at least turn around in his chair to face Dwicky. His eyes were still hidden behind thick goggles, so it was hard to tell what kind of expression he was giving the other man at the moment. Though when he spoke, it was clear he was pretty clueless as to why the other was there. "Yes? Do you need something?"

Dwicky nodded and that pleasant smile from before came back as he pressed his fingertips together in a business like fashion. "Yes. I'm Mister Dwicky, we spoke about a week ago." He added before stepping forward "I wanted to be Dib's personal councilor." He cleared his throat again before he continued "I just stopped by to talk to you about your son's vast improvements."

Membrane continued to keep his eyes on Dwicky for a few more seconds until realization seemed to dawn on him, which only caused him to turn back around in his seat. The sparks that had come forth from the console before began once more, but he only spoke over them. "Really? What sort of improvements would these be? Has he finally stopped babbling about aliens and other such nonsense? Does he finally want to take on Real Science, because if not, then I would see no improvements."

"He has." Dwicky spoke louder to be heard over the sound of the work Membrane did, and in hidden aggravation that the other wasn't giving the information about his son more of his attention. "Dib has given up his silly obsession with the paranormal. He knows now just how silly it was, and has willingly let go of it. He's made such great progress in just four days, Professor. He's alert, coherent, and can hold a perfectly normal conversation like anyone else." He placed his hands in the air to gesture. "You'd be quite proud of him." it was obvious that Dwicky was from the expression on his face. He clasped his hands together. "And really, that's all he really wants, sir. And to come home to his family."

Membrane made a small, amused sound at all the information, as if it were all some kind of joke he had just been told. "I find that all hard to believe." The sparks stopped for a quick moment and he set the small tool he had been using aside, just so he could lift up what he had been working on. The object was rectangular in shape and looked like some form of metal aquarium. "The asylum told me it would be a miracle if he ever got well. It never surprised me much. I always knew he was too far gone. What you see, or what you think you see, is probably only temporary."

Dwicky didn't look at the object Membrane that was fooling with, he kept his eyes definite on the other man. His voice never wavered from its positive note. "Well, then it's a miracle, Professor. Come visit him and see for yourself. Speak with the members at the hospital, they'll tell you he's been quiet since I came. No screaming, no raving on about aliens." Dwicky's smile grew. "They even moved him to a nicer room for all his efforts."

Membrane turned the large object in his hands a few times before finally setting it down, just so he could turn his full attention on Dwicky. He watched the other man for a few moments until a somewhat annoyed expression came to what could be seen of his face. "Moving him to a nicer room doesn't mean anything. Besides, I pay you to visit him and talk to him. I'm a very busy man. I can't just take time off to go to an asylum and have small talk." With those words, he turned his back on Dwicky once more and picked up the tool he had been using and went straight back to work.

Dwicky stood there a moment before he walked over beside the console near Membrane. "With your support, Professor, Dib would get better much sooner. All it takes is a few scheduled visits to show your son that you care, and haven't abandoned him. Most of his improvements are for your sake. To make you proud, sir." Finally, his eyes flicked to the metal container that Membrane was working on, but soon his gaze returned to the other just as quickly. "Dib could even come here, back home for day, or even an over night stay if it's convenience you're worried about." He coaxed with a smile. "Getting out into the fresh air after so long would do wonders for him. All he needs to do so is your permission, Professor."

The last few sentences that came from Dwicky had Membrane stopping once again. For a few seconds he kept still before any words would finally come from his mouth. "I refuse to have him come back home unless I'm absolutely sure he's completely well." His free hand moved up to run down his face, wishing in some way that would make the situation easier. It didn't. "Listen..." His voice sounded strained as he went on. "...I'll try my best to go over there and see him. I can't make any guarantees though. He's gone without seeing me for this long. I'm sure he can go a little longer if I can't make it."

"You need to make a definite time, Professor. He hasn't seen you in several years now, not one visit. And if you've looked through his file, you'd see the isolation has only made things worse." Dwicky's expression went a little thoughtful and his hands rose making a spacious oval in between them. "Here. Think of Dib at the moment as a glass pitcher. Right now he's pouring out all this nonsense about aliens out from inside him. It was his life's obsession, right? But now, with all that gone, he's empty, with not much else to go by. He needs you, his father, to fill that void with love and guidance. You can help him with his new career path and aspirations. You can help him identify who he is, and what he will become." Dwicky's hands pressed together palm to palm. "He looks up to you, Professor Membrane."

Membrane waved a dismissive hand Dwicky's way before turning his full attention back to his project. "Don't try any of that psychological talk with me. I'm not your patient." Small sparks once again came forth, bouncing off the console and onto the floor. "I told you I would try my best to see him. If that's not good enough, then I can't really help that." His voice had become louder over the noise he made. "If he's as coherent as you say he is, then he'll know what I want him to do. He doesn't need me to tell him what kind of career he needs to choose."

Dwicky blinked, he hadn't expected that, or the sort of impartialness he was receiving. "It wasn't psycho-babble, sir, it was a metaphor." he spoke more to himself at that. He clasped his hands together a moment. "Well... then." Dwicky clicked his tongue and looked at things about him thoughtfully, but it was more delaying the inevitable. "Professor, in the meantime, since you're so busy, I'll take it in on myself to take the boy on daily outings. I'm sure it'll still help Dib in the long run." With confidence, he pulled out a piece of paper from his jacket and handed it to Membrane. "If you would just sign this, I'll be more than happy to oblige." Dwicky tilted his head with a new smile.

Membrane glanced to the side and at the paper held out to him. For a few seconds, he stared at it until a harsh sigh escaped him and he turned away from his work once more. He moved a hand around his coat, searching until finally he was able to pull a pen from one of the pockets. He grabbed the paper from Dwicky's hand just long enough for him to sign on the bottom. He quickly handed the paper back and threw the pen aside on the console. "There, are you satisfied now?" He turned his attention back to his work once again.

Dwicky plucked the paper back from Membrane's hand. He nodded and gave a smile that he really didn't mean. "Yes, sir." Carefully, he rolled the paper and tucked it back into the jacket pocket he'd retrieved it from. "If there's anything you'd like to ask me about your son, feel free." He straightened his jacket, so perfectly pressed for this one occasion, Dwicky was surprised the wrinkles actually left his shirt underneath. "And, if you'd like me to pass anything onto him, a message or..._anything_." He encouraged lightly "It would mean a lot to him." But he doubted it would to Membrane.

Membrane refused to move his attention away this time. Instead, he easily answered Dwicky while keeping his eyes on the metal case in front of him. "You can tell him that it's important that he focuses on what he needs to do. Only then will he actually be able to get out of that place." With that, Membrane went silent once more, allowing everything around him to be drowned out by the work he was doing.

Dwicky nodded, though he knew it wouldn't be seen, and that a good bye wouldn't be heard, but he gave one anyway. Professor Membrane had already dismissed him; oh the tolls of a worldly important man.

Turning, Dwicky let himself out of the lab, climbing the stairs, and feeling beyond dazed. Through the hall he walked, bringing himself back to the living room and an awkward moment. The music from the TV was blaring though, and the two girls had taken it in themselves to enjoy something much more fun.

He received a few choice glares from them burning several more good holes into his already swiss cheesed head. But otherwise, they paid no mind as Dwicky took the knob of the door shakily and let himself out of the house.

No wonder Dib was so far gone, his family was nuts.


	9. Sessions 9

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

**By Kitteh and NeoFox**

**Rating** PG 13

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 09

The weekend went by rather quickly for those who weren't looking forward to too much. In the Crazy House, each Doctor and Nurse went about their day griping about how they wasted two perfectly good days tending to people that they didn't care to see. It was probably why every single staff member always seemed to be in a foul mood on Mondays.

There was one person in the asylum that had been looking forward to something in particular all weekend though. Alone in his cell, Dib lay on the small bed with his back facing the door. His whole body was completely tense and his eyes were trained to the wall in front of him. They would dart towards the smallest sound, but fall back to the wall immediately after in disappointment. He had been that way most of the weekend, except for when he had been pulled out to get cleaned up, which wasn't his choice anyway.

But soon came the definite sound of shoes down the hall; definitely queer, rhythmic clacking eagerly down the tiling of the floor. They stopped in front of the door, trying not to tap out an impatient beat as someone unlocked the door to let him in. It was a hold of breath and the swing of the door that let in the very figure of all that was good and happy with the world shining into Dib's room.

"Good morning, Dib!" Dwicky threw out his arms, proving his good mood with a wide smile. The door immediately slammed after him; he was giving the hired help tooth aches and diabetes.

Dib immediately turned his head towards the door at the sound of that voice. When he saw Dwicky, a small smile came over his face and he quickly made a move to sit up on the bed. It took him a few moments to actually get his feet over the edge, but as soon as he did, it took him almost no time to hurry off the mattress and over to the other. His socks caused him to almost slip on the tiled floor, but he didn't seem to care and stopped only as soon as he had his head buried in Dwicky's shirt, his voice small and muffled in the fabric. "I missed you..."

Dwicky immediately threw his arms around the boy, falling back a bit with Dib's impact against him. "Oops. Careful." He chuckled as he leaned down to firmly nuzzle a cheek against the boy's hair. "Oh! Clean." He turned his head to nuzzle his face into Dib's dark hair, inhaling the clean scent, and exhaling with a happy sigh. "Mmmmph. I missed you too, clean Dib." He squeezed Dib tightly for a good long second before he leaned back up a moment to gaze down at the boy, very much happy. "So how was your weekend?"

Dib gave a small, pleased noise when Dwicky held onto him. As soon as the man leaned back, Dib lifted his head so that he could stare at the other's face. He bit at his lip for a few seconds as he hesitated to answer, until finally the words came to him. "It was okay. At first it was scary, but I tried really hard, like you told me to." He lowered his head back down. "They were there then they just kind of faded away. I wouldn't listen to them. I haven't heard them since then." He just barely lifted a nervous glance back up to Dwicky after he was done speaking.

"That's excellent news." Dwicky grinned. "I'm glad to hear it. I really am. Good news to come back to." His fingers played through the boy's dark hair, enjoying the feeling of smooth, soft, clean hair. Fingers smoothed down the ruffled strands on one side, brushing Dib's hair back before petting the back of the boy's head. "So what did you think about, then? Oh, and how did you sleep the past few days? Did they give you a sedative?" Dwicky leaned down closer again, just to be nearer as he continued to keep Dib cuddled close. "Because I noted you didn't phone." He couldn't help the lame grin; not that he spent most of his weekend lying on the couch near the phone waiting to be called. No, of course not. "I'm proud of you." Dwicky's grin went softer; it wasn't he who should be saying that phrase to Dib.

The nervous expression faded from Dib's face as Dwicky's hands ran through his hair. For a few seconds he closed his eyes and kept them that way until the questions begged to be answered, the small last sentence caused a small smile to form on his face before he spoke. "You said it was okay if I thought about everything we did, right? I just thought about that. It kept them really quiet." His smile fell and he quickly averted his eyes down to the floor. "They still had to give me pills to sleep though. I tried to do it on my own, but they wouldn't go away. I was scared, but I didn't want to call you. I didn't want to let you down. I'm sorry..."

Dwicky nodded firmly. "Nothing to be sorry about. You did very well. You were very brave." He glanced behind him at the door and the peeking window that gave a view in as well as out. Pulling his arms back, he placed his hands on Dib's shoulders and gently turned the boy, guiding him backwards slowly until the boy's back rested against the far wall from the door; the window's blind spot. There Dwicky gave a wider grin, leaning back down to kiss the boy's cheek "And you can't imagine how much I've missed this." he tugged down Dib's collar so that he could have at with the boy's lips. "Mmm. And this." he stole the boy's chin with fingers, tilting Dib's head back to taste his lips before firmly kissing longer. "Mmf. And that." he murmured after.

Dib had easily let Dwicky lead him away from the door, but let out a small, surprised sound when his back hit the wall. The noise died away when he felt the other's lips on his skin and turned into more eager sounds. As soon as the last kiss was over, Dib couldn't help but let his tongue dart out to lick at his lips while staring up at Dwicky. He didn't stay still for long though and was soon stealing a kiss of his own from the man letting that same tongue move out to push past the other's mouth.

Dwicky eagerly deepened the kiss, his own tongue running along Dib's as he greedily tasted the other's mouth. His hand moved from Dib's chin to find itself in the boy's hair, keeping Dib's mouth firmly his. He gave a throaty moan, muffling it a moment as he broke the kiss, only to muffle it again against Dib's tongue and bottom lip. He ran his tongue against the ridge of Dib's bottom teeth, pulling back just enough to speak. "Though, I'd have to say I miss that the most." he couldn't keep the suggestive grin off his face even if he wanted to.

A shy smile came over Dib's face for a moment before he let a small laugh escape him. He pushed his lips against Dwicky's once more for a short, brief kiss, pulling back just as quickly so he could speak. "I missed it all." He moved forward just so he could rest his head against the other's shirt once more, a small sigh coming from him before he spoke up again. "What did you do away from here? Did you do all the things you said you were going to do?"

Dwicky leaned the top of his head against the wall, leaning down to grin at the top of Dib's. He buried several kisses in the boy's dark hair, giving a happy laugh that couldn't be contained. "I did. I did all that, and more." There was no stopping the hail of jubilant little kisses that petered down Dib's temple, where he could feel Dib's, and chuckled before he playfully took the boy's lower lobe in his mouth to nibble.

Dib was about to open his mouth once more, but each kiss had him quieting and squirming around instead. As soon as Dwicky started to bite at his ear, it had small noises coming from Dib once more as he tried to bury his face further into the man's shirt. The action did nothing but muffle the small sounds, and after awhile, he turned his head a bit to speak, his voice nothing but a whisper. "I really like that..."

Dwicky ran his tongue along Dib's lobe, sucking it softly before he let it go. He grinned near the boy's ear, moving to place lips back upon it to speak. "Hmm?" He kissed near the rim of Dib's ear before he went on "What's that?" Dwicky slipped his arms back around the boy, sneaky fingers gripped the bottom of the straitjacket, tugging it up from Dib's hips to get at the inviting skin underneath.

Louder sounds came from Dib at the extra attention paid to his ear. When the feeling suddenly stopped, the sounds became frustrated whines that stopped at Dwicky's question. "When you do that to my ear." The words came out a bit nervous and a small blush had formed on his cheeks, which he tried to hide once again in the other's shirt. Feeling hands near his back though had him calming down just slightly and his body just barely eased up.

"Your ears?" Dwicky raised his head a little to look at one in question. "I take it they're sensitive." That had the man truly grinning, having stumbled upon rather tasty information there. "How can telling my good news compare to exploiting your ears." He made a dramatic sort of 'tsk' as he shook his head and tugged Dib nearer by his hips. "It just doesn't compete." Dwicky lazily ran his tongue over his own teeth, slipping it from his mouth to slowly draw it up the rim of Dib's ear. Wetting his lips, Dwicky then blew down the moist skin, blowing down Dib's neck inside the jacket's stiff collar.

Such sudden actions had Dib letting out a low moan that he didn't even try to quiet. A small shiver ran down his body at the cool air that was blown against his skin and it only had him letting out a louder noise. "No fair..." Despite the quiet words, it was obvious Dib didn't want the other to stop. Instead, he leaned his head towards Dwicky's mouth while giving out impatient sounds.

Dwicky's eyes widened a bit at the noise Dib made and he glanced to the door. His eyes shifted half way closed as he looked back at Dib, granting the boy the new kisses and attention he wanted on his ear. Though in the midst he had to stop, giving a disappointed sound of his own before Dib could. "Sorry, Dib." he murmured against the boy's ear "Business before.. taking you up against a wall." Dwicky cleared his throat sharply. He tugged the boy from the padded wall and guided Dib to sit on the bed. He tried not to pout more than Dib, it was hard.

Dib gave a small whine when it all ended and Dwicky's words had the blush from earlier returning to his face just a bit darker. He gave no real protest to being tugged towards the bed, and settled down if only fidgeting a bit under the jacket. He kept his eyes on the other the entire time, a curious expression on his own face. What Dwicky had said earlier was coming back to him. "What did you mean when you said you had good news?"

The grin returned to Dwicky's face in seconds flat. He pressed his hands together, seeming like a cheery sort of holy man ready to dawn good news upon his disciple. Nodding, Dwicky let his prayer touched hands lower to a much more casual business stance. "I _did _ talk to your father." His grin only grew wider as he left it at that, horrible of himself, he knew.

Dib's eyes widened at those words. "Really?" Slowly, his expression became nervous and his eyes darted towards the door as if Membrane would walk through it at any second. Despite as nervous as he seemed, there was still obvious hope in his eyes as he stared at the barred up window. After a few seconds though, he gave into the fact his father wasn't coming in any time soon and turned his attention back to Dwicky. "What did he say?"

"Well," Dwicky looked back from the window as well, knowing full well Membrane wasn't going to burst through the door, though for Dib's sake he wished for that random, frightening miracle "he said he'd visit." He nodded, but the promise of that seemed nil, and added a "When he has the chance." just killing the hopefulness of that. But Dwicky kept that optimistic smile going. "He was surprised and pleased by what I told him of your progress. And wanted me to tell you to keep up the good work and you'll be out in no time." He gave the 'go-get-em' swing of fist to match. At least it wasn't completely unfaithful to how the conversation went, he just omitted a lot.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky, though all the excitement from earlier seemed to have been sucked out of him at just the first few words he was told. He tried his best to give a small smile at the last bit of information given to him, but it was hard. His eyes eventually fell down to his lap while he chewed at his bottom lip for a bit. "If he was pleased, then why didn't he try to make time to come see me?" The words finally fell from his mouth after a few moments, as much as he tried to keep them in.

Dwicky's expression softened, with guilt, with pity, and other such worries that he couldn't help when Dib looked so crestfallen. He knelt down in front of Dib, resting either hand on either of the boy's leg. "He's a busy man. I'm sure if he turned away for a second something would explode and take a good chunk of humanity with it." He gave a small chuckle, trying to make the moment a little more light hearted. "He's rooting for you. Gaz too." Now that was an utter and complete stretch, even Dwicky realized after meeting her. But he distracted either of them by rubbing the sides of Dib's lap. "But, really, that isn't the good news, good news." Dwicky truly grinned cattily then.

Dib's eyes watched Dwicky's hands the entire time. For a few seconds, he stayed silent until he finally raised his head to look at the other. It was easy to tell he was still upset, but obviously curious also. "What other good news is there?" He narrowed his eyes a bit as he watched Dwicky. "What are you grinning about?"

"Well." Dwicky tilted his head one way. "I _could _ tell you now. Or, I could wait till tomorrow and _show _ you." The man's grin could only grow bigger, if not more mischievous.

Dib tried to fidget once more beneath the jacket at each option. "That's not fair." He moved his eyes away just so he could move them around the room. A small pout came over his face as he tried to answer Dwicky and in the end he gave a small frustrated whine. His eyes moved back to the man. "You always tease me. It's not fair." Even after the annoyed words came from Dib's mouth, there was still a small smile on his face after they were said.

Dwicky gave a playful chuckle, slipping his hands to Dib's hips to tug the boy closer so he could sit taller to steal a small kiss. "I know. I'm sorry." He slipped between the boy's legs to press his lips a little longer on Dib's just to make up for it. "Tell you what, it's your choice. Okay? Tell you now, or wait for tomorrow." Dwicky grinned. "If you can wait that long. But a day compared to a week, easy right?" Far from the truth, but either way Dwicky was completely excited.

Dib's mood seemed to lift even more at the kisses. When Dwicky pulled back and spoke once more, he gave a small sigh and looked away again. "I guess I can wait. It shouldn't be so bad." He glanced at the other out the corner of his eyes. "I wonder though. Will you be able to wait that long?" A small grin came to Dib's own lips.

Dwicky scratched the back of his head, ruffling his hair at the same time with a guilty grin. "I can try. Or, at least," he let his hand fall back down to his side with a slight smirk "preoccupy myself with something else." He stole one, last lingering kiss before he pulled away to stand and sit next to Dib. "So," he knitted his fingers together, speaking completely professional "Dib, how are you today? What is the deeper meaning to that? And how does that make you feel?" He paused only to give up the act with a playful grin. It was mean to tease the boy like that, but he was just trying to poke some fun.

Dib stuck out his tongue at the questions until a slow smile spread on his face. He turned around just a bit so he was better facing Dwicky, his feet kicking the side of the mattress as he did so. "I'm much better now that you're here." He carefully leaned forward a bit 'til he was face to face with the other. "I don't want to go through another weekend without you again." His lips barely brushed against Dwicky's as he continued to speak. "I think I'd miss you just as much if more if I had to do it again."

Dwicky chuckled giddy and quietly. "Yea." Though he wasn't about to let Dib's lips escape that easy. He leaned forward, stealing a playful kiss or three. "Though it might have to happen. It can't be helped." He brushed a few knuckles against Dib's pale cheek. "You'll get through it just as easy, if not easier. I know it. We've just seen it." He leaned his forehead against Dib's. "I believe in you. You won't let me down."

Small, quiet noises escaped Dib at each kiss. The touch against his cheek had him closing his eyes partly as he continued to stare at Dwicky for a few more seconds. Even with what the other said, there was no real disappointment. It was the last little words which had that rare smile coming to his face once more.

Without much warning, Dib moved forward once again, taking Dwicky's bottom lip between his teeth and sucking at it. His tongue darted out a few times to lick at the flesh, a small grin on his lips as he kept his eyes on Dwicky's own. In a matter of seconds, he let go just so he could trail his tongue over the abused lip and down Dwicky's chin, the small grin still on his face the entire time.

Dwicky emitted a low groan, completely thrown for the best at Dib's actions. Immediately he slipped his arms around the boy, dragging him against him. "Though…" Dwicky drew his word slow and lazily. He licked his bruised lip, grinning wide after "you make a good argument. Mmf. When did you become so..-so alluring." It was hard to keep hands still, let alone on chaste places on Dib. Dwicky had to settle for Dib's hips, even then fingers kept creeping along under fabric. He leaned down giving a few playful kisses against the boy's ear before speaking against it. "I guess I missed that memo."

Dib gave a small whine at the kisses on his ear, the few words spoken near it caused him to let out a small noise after. He easily pressed closer against Dwicky and instead of speaking up, he pulled his ear away from the man's lips just so he could lean down. He nuzzled his face against Dwicky's neck for a few seconds until his tongue darted out to lick at skin, his teeth sometimes pinching at certain areas which he licked at after.

Dwicky made a short throaty sound and much to his own chagrin, he removed his hands from the boy's waist to his shoulders to pull Dib back. "We really are getting ahead of ourselves." He shook his head as he looked down at Dib. "I would love to be hired to sit here and kiss you all over but-.. there's time for that later. We'll have plenty of time to kiss every bit of skin after you get out." But that didn't stop Dwicky from kissing the definite pout on Dib's lips. After, he tried to offer the boy an empathetic smile. "But now, we have to fix everything so you will."

Dib gave a frustrated sigh even after the kiss and averted his eyes down to the mattress. The small pout stayed until he chewed at his lip and finally spoke up after a few moments of silence. "I don't think I'll ever get out. My dad said he was surprised at how well I was doing, right? None of that matters though if he doesn't come to see me. He's always so busy." Dib finally lifted his eyes back up to look at Dwicky once more. A small worried expression crossing his face. "If he doesn't actually see, then I can't get out."

"He's a busy man, Dib. You know that. We'll just continue to work on your progress until he does." Dwicky rubbed Dib's shoulder, attempting to assuage the boy. "I'll just keep on him, reminding him to see you. Don't worry, he will._"Eventually_. Membrane hadn't been exactly eager to get Dib home, and Gaz-- Gaz was.. who was Dwicky kidding; Dib's family really didn't care. But, no need to bring that upon Dib at the moment.

Dwicky lightly cleared his throat. "So, then, let's get on about what you'd like to do once you're out. Careers. Have you given that anymore thought?" Membrane seemed animate about that. It could only give Dwicky more ammunition next time they spoke.

Dib slowly shook his head while letting his gaze fall back down to the bed. "Not really. Well, I guess in a way I have if you count Skool." It was easy to tell he was starting to fidget as best he could inside the jacket. His toes had started to curl a bit inside his socks at his sides as well. "It's just really hard for me to think about that kind of stuff. I don't know what else could interest me. Besides, I'm only fourteen. I shouldn't have to be forced into any kind of career right now, right?" Even though the question was asked, he still kept his eyes down as if afraid of the answer.

"True, you still have a lot of time to think on it. But these are special circumstances. It would help to take the time now to think what you'd like to do. Start now. Find an interest and just continue following that path." Dwicky rubbed his goatee thoughtfully. "Your dad seems to think it's rather important. And I'm sure it would please him to know you've found a new, respectable career, right?" Dwicky reached over and tugged the fidgeting boy onto his lap, remembering he'd promised to hold Dib for every. Even if Dib wasn't hearing anything, Dwicky wanted to give the boy some comfort. "It shouldn't be so hard. Let's just figure out some more interests, and think of things you'd like to do."

Dib easily cuddled up against Dwicky's chest, burying his head against the man's shirt. "He just wants me to be his heir, that's all." He gave an annoyed noise after the words left his mouth. For a few moments he stayed silent until finally he spoke up once more, his voice hesitant. "You told me once before that since I was interested in bugs I could probably find a job that had to do with that interest, right? Well, maybe I could try that. It couldn't hurt. I mean, just as something to start me off, since I'm not sure."

Dwicky glanced down to Dib and nodded with a smile "Of course. I'm sure it would be an interesting hobby. A lot of people collect bugs, like stamps.. just, with legs." He made a thoughtful sound. "I wonder if rare bugs are worth anything like stamps." He looked back down to the boy "But, anyway, your father is just looking out for your own interest. Does science interest you at all? What about computers? I know you're a real genius with them. I've seen it first hand. There's good work in programming, I hear." Dwicky made a slight lewd 'heh'. "Yeaaa, computers are suuure distracting. You can waste a complete day without realizing it." He cleared his throat; he was rambling now.

Dib shook his head just a bit against Dwicky's chest. "No, I'm not at all interested in science. Like I said before, I tried it and it ended up becoming something that bored me." He began to fidget once more at suddenly being called a genius. His eyes moved away once more towards the wall. "I'm used to working with computers. It was always a hobby until it turned into more. I learned how to get a lot of files that I really shouldn't look at and work with technology that even my dad didn't know how to use." He finally turned his head so he could look up at Dwicky. "I knew I could get in trouble, but most of it was for my own purposes. I didn't really do it to hurt anyone."

Fingers trailed up and down Dib's throat. Dwicky smiled blatantly down at the boy. "Well, there you go, Dib. You've found you _do _have a talent." He grinned only to kiss the boy's forehead. "Congratulations."

Dib gave a small smile before burying his face once more into Dwicky's chest. "I never thought about getting anywhere with just that." His smile slowly faded as he continued to bury his face further. "I don't know though. I'm not sure if I could get anywhere with that kind of talent. I mean, I'm good with computers, yeah, but do you really think anyone would want me for everything I know?" A small noise came from him. "Do you think my dad would actually approve?"

"I'm sure that's a type of science." Dwicky tilted his head. "Computer science. Yea." He gave an affirming nod. "Yea, I'm pretty sure." He glanced down again. "Besides, there's only one way to figure this all out." He splayed out his hand, moving it across as if it were plainly written in front of them in bright, neon lights. "Give it a try."

Dib gave a slow nod that could barely be felt. "I guess I could. At least that way I'll have something that will definitely keep me interested." He finally lifted his head so that he could look at Dwicky's face once more. "Maybe I could become famous in some way by doing that. It's a long ways away though. I still have to finish Skool." He shook his head a bit before glancing to the side. "I still have to get out of here. There's no telling when that's going to be. I'm trying, and I'm really anxious to get out."

"Well sure! There's tons of famous people who do computer things." Dwicky piped up pointedly. "Like, that guy. Ya'know, the one who made that thingy, and owns that _huge _ computer company: Harry Door. Yea, that guy." He ran a few fingers through Dib's hair, letting his hand fall to rest at the side of the boy's face before turning his attention back to him. "You'll do it. You'll do everything you want to. Just keep focused. Don't let anything detour you, okay Dib?"

Dib gave a small 'hmm' sound at Dwicky's words. For a few moments he stayed silent, deep in his own thoughts. He leaned into the small touch to his face before letting a sigh escape him. "I just want to be successful in some way. I always wanted to be on TV or maybe even the newspaper, ya know? I always wanted everyone to know who I was by name, and for something important that I did. I didn't want them to know me for being the weird, freaky kid that believed in strange things." A small smile came to his face as he went on. "If I could get that just by doing something I'm good at, then I guess it's not so bad."

Dwicky smirked a little. "Nice to know you're humble about your life goals." But he shook his head and chuckled. "It's good that you want to achieve great things, and become a somebody." He continued to run his fingers through the boy's hair idly. "It's just a matter of figuring out the steps to take it. It's all about setting goals, never standards. Always be achieving and never be happy for settling for where you are in life." Dwicky rested his cheek atop the boy's head lightly, his voice fell quieter. "You're only fourteen, and you've had more life experience than any kid your age. Knowing where you're going is half the battle. You've already got a jump start on life." His free arm slipped tighter around Dib.

Dib allowed his eyes to close and his head to fall back against Dwicky's chest. "All of that experience was fake though. I might as well be starting from the beginning. None of what I did before I was in here really matters." There was no real disappointment in his voice despite his words. Each small touch had caused him to become completely relaxed. "I just have to focus on other things. I have to remember that what I studied before wasn't real and try to move away from that."

"A clean slate." Dwicky tightened both arms firmly around Dib, tucking the boy's head under his chin. "Don't look back, but forward. You can do it, you've already started. You're learning from your mistakes, and that's what really counts." He gave a gentle sigh. "So. Let's talk more about what you like to do, on the computer, that is. What generally interests you about it? Tell me all about what you like." he spoke in a quiet, cheerful tone.

"Well..." Dib's voice slowly started out hesitant. His body shifted around just a bit despite the hold Dwicky had on him. "I think it's mostly the technology aspect. The fact that I can do anything. Sometimes there would be situations where it would be a challenge for me to get what I wanted, and I guess I just liked that. It's not really all that easy." He stopped for a moment, as if afraid to actually go on, but after a few moments he finally continued. His voice went a bit quieter. "I actually practiced a bit by going through my dad's files. That way if I got in trouble there wouldn't really be many consequences. I could just run things through his name and make it seem like an accident."

"Gasp!" Dwicky chuckled a little, resting his cheek against the boy's head instead. "So it's the challenge that you like. Computers are quite challenging. I'd have to say computers in general take a certain knack. A lot of people can't even check email, let alone figure out how to turn a computer on. I'm sure you could break the boundaries of interweb limits, and really make the computers of tomorrow something to be had. Or," he drew the word out turning his head the other way "become some crazy radical spy hacker that sucks up bank numbers and sells them to the mob or some guy named 'Paul'. Ha-ha." Dwicky coughed. "But seriously, don't do that." he lightly scorned the idea. "That would be bad. Very, _very,_ bad."

Dib only nodded his head a bit at the last part Dwicky said. "It all depends I guess. I mean, I spent most of my time hacking little things and trying to get where I shouldn't. I probably would become a bit lost trying to do anything else. I'm sure I could get used to it all again." His eyes opened just a bit as another small sigh came from him. "I can't even remember the last time I used a computer. It was so long ago. I might have turned into one of those people that don't know even know how to turn one on anymore."

"Like riding a tricycle. I'm sure the moment you sit down to a screen it'll all come back to you." The man started idly rubbing the boy's back. "Besides, you have time to improve. Lot's of time to acquire new skills and round yourself in any field. But now you have two career alternatives to try out." Dwicky smiled against the top of Dib's head. "Any other hobbies? Reading maybe? Studies? Or crafts and building? Architecture?" He could recall one or two zany blue-prints of zany machines for alien counter attacks in the boy's old school folder.

"I did build things off and on." Dib eased up once more as Dwicky started rubbing his back. His voice became just a bit louder. "They were never really important things though. It was mostly just stuff I built to annoy Zim. I think there were a few times I built things for Skool as well, but I never put as much effort into those projects as I did other stuff." He made a small noise in the back of his throat before he slowly shook his head against the other's chest. "I don't know if I'd be as good at building things as I would messing with computers. I guess it all depends on what I have to make."

Dwicky's hand rose up to gently pet the back of the boy's head, fingers dipping into the fray of dark hair every so often. "Give anything a shot, I say. You could invent things..-maybe even make a few custom computers of your own. Just try a little bit of everything." Dwicky raised his head enough to smile down at Dib. "But hey, you have a plan so far. That's good. And when you get out you'll really have a chance to try some new things first hand. You might discover something new you like doing."

Dib gave a small smile of his own at the words and thoughts that went through his head. "This isn't at all as bad as I thought it would be." He lifted his head so that he could gaze up at Dwicky. "Although, I don't want to do any of it and become like my dad. Sure, I want to enjoy what I end up doing just as much as I used to, but I don't want it to run my life." His eyes narrowed a bit at that. "That sounds weird, I guess, since I used to be so into aliens and everything. I didn't really care about anything else."

"Yeap." Dwicky affirmed, having seen that first hand. "Being so obsessed over one thing isn't healthy. You neglect other things like: your family, your school work, friends, pets, house plants.. etcetera." He waved an idle hand in gesture. "It's good to balance out your life: food, exercise, compulsive needs, hobbies, work." Dwicky clicked his tongue. "You'll learn first hand it's easier to sleep at night when your mind isn't completely fixated on something." He gave a slight guilty laugh, looking to the ceiling; he was one to talk.

Dib tilted his head to the side a bit as he continued to stare at Dwicky, becoming curious at the small laugh. Instead of speaking up about it though, he quickly let it go and looked back down towards the wall. "Well, I'm sure that can all change now. I guess at first it will be hard to do. I was so used to being focused on just one thing and one thing only. Having an actual life outside of that will seem a bit strange." He shook his head. "I'll finally be normal though."

Dwicky nodded against the top of Dib's head. As normal as _this _ could be. Though he didn't say that. He just continued on speaking, neglecting to speak of it. "You'll be able to go back to skool and catch up on your studies. See all your old friends again, go to parks, ride bikes, play tether ball, hop scotch." Dwicky chuckled lightly; there would be very little room for him in the boy's life now that he thought about it. "You'll have so much to do and catch up on. You don't have time to think of anything bad." He closed his eyes and placed a simple kiss atop the boy's head before resting his head back on it with a small sigh.

Dib only shook his head a bit more at Dwicky's words. "I doubt I would do most of that stuff. I didn't have many friends at Skool." He made a quiet sound at that. "Actually, I didn't have any friends at all. I'll probably just focus on figuring things out for myself whenever I go back. I never was very social with anyone. I tried to be from time to time, but no one was interested in what I had to say, so, I kept to myself a lot." He shrugged his shoulders as best he could beneath the thick jacket. "Maybe all of that will change though. If I go back a different person maybe people will pay attention to what I have to say." A small frown came to his face that he tried to hide by once again hiding his face in the other's shirt.

Dwicky's arms tightened around the boy when he did. He rubbed the boy's back encouragingly. "I'm sure you'll make many new friends. And have made many new and exciting memories." He made a thoughtful sound. "You're fourteen, right? Sooo, you'll be going into grade eight or nine? Hm! You'd be going into hi-skool wouldn't you? Well, that's a whole new world right there for you to explore; Dances, new experiences, girls, hormones, school clubs. Hi-skool is a whole new experience. Where you rediscover yourself and try new things." Dwicky gave a knowing chuckle. "Well, i _aside /i _ from college." His chuckle only grew more estranged at that.

Dib let out a frustrated sound at what Dwicky said. "I don't know about all of that. I'm not much of a dancer. I guess I could become part of some kind of club. There might be some that would interest me. As for girls..." He gave another small noise before turning his head so that his face was no longer buried. "...I see no reason to worry about them. I would have you. What would I need girls for?" His voice turned shy and quiet as he continued. "Unless when I get out that means this is over. I thought you said I could still see you though..."

Dwicky wished his cheeks didn't decide to warm over at that. He was touched, though he shouldn't have been all that surprised. He also wished good morals and guilt didn't show up at the worst of times. Damn for good judgment showing up when it counted.

But that didn't seem to stop Dwicky as he ran a few fingers through Dib's hair, causing the scythe lock atop to bounce in a plush like fashion. "I did. And I meant it. I want to.." his voice petered. His fingers drew down to the boy's cheek, stroking it a moment before cupping his hand against it. "I want to take care of you, keep you safe." His dark brows furrowed, and even though he gave a small, sincere smile, it was sad. "I want to wake up with you next to me." It was apparent in the man's voice that it was all so hard to say, and he couldn't help softly petting the boy's cheek with a finger to distract himself. "Though all that is a bit more complicated outside here, kiddo."

Despite each touch that Dwicky gave to him, Dib still couldn't help the small upset noise that came from him. "If we both still want that then we can make it work, right? It doesn't have to be complicated. I'm sure we can think of something." Though whatever that something was, it completely escaped Dib's mind. He dropped his gaze back down between them. The sudden conversation causing what good mood he had to take a turn. "You're gonna end up leaving me again, aren't you?"

Fingers captured up Dib's chin, raising the boy's gaze back up, but it was a slow assuring kiss instead of words that Dib received. Dwicky smiled that same sad smile. "There's no where else in the galaxies I rather be, than right here." It was completely honest, and the cheesy words only had Dwicky grinning more. "Leave it to me, I'll take care of everything." He'd figure something out, somehow..

Dib blinked his eyes in a small bit of surprise before a slow smile made its way onto his own face. He easily buried his face once more against Dwicky's chest. The worry was gone from his mind for the moment. "I have a lot to look forward to when I get out. In a way it's kind of exciting. Scary at the same time, but still exciting. It just makes me anxious to get out even more." He gave a small sigh. "You know, I still wonder if it's right for me to give up everything I believed in. It's for the best though, right? If I can actually be something by just using other talents, then I guess it's not so bad."

"Exactly." Dwicky pet his fingers through Dib's hair again. "Just leave the past where it is and move on. You'll do just fine out there, I know it." He kept his arms around the boy a moment, enjoying the small body nuzzled against him.

"Let's have a bit of practice, shall we?" He tugged Dib back from him gently so he could look down at the boy's face. "You know, just a casual bit of role playing to get used to the idea of being out. Social interaction. That sort of thing." Dib could feel Dwicky fiddle with the buckles on the sleeves to undo them.

Dib chewed at his bottom lip for a moment, hesitant of the idea. His eyes darted around the bed even as he felt the sleeves start to become undone, the usual excitement not really there. "I guess that's okay. If it will really help." He gave a small, shaky sigh before letting his eyes fall back on Dwicky. "I'm not sure if I'll really be any good at it, but I'll try..."

Once Dwicky had the sleeves undone, he tugged them forward, uncrossing the boy's arms. He then began to roll up each sleeve to reveal each of the boy's hands, humming a cheerful tune as he did so. "It'll be easy. This will give you a chance to practice, so that when the time comes you know how to deal with things. Like, for example, talking to your dad." He glanced at Dib. "I'm sure you're nervous about that. Any other sorts of interaction you're worried about that we could go over?"

Dib nodded his head a bit. Once his hands were completely free, he quickly grabbed both of Dwicky's own in a tight grip refusing to let go. "I'm afraid of what people will think of me when I get out. I'm not sure what to say or do around anyone. It's true that I'm really nervous about my dad, but I'm scared of any kind of interaction in general. I don't want to say the wrong things. I want to say things that will get me accepted." He kept his eyes down on their hands. "I'm afraid I'll screw it up though. People may continue to think I'm weird."

Dwicky blinked but curled his fingers, what he could, around Dib's. He raised one of Dib's hands and gently kissed the ring finger's knuckle, hoping that would ease the boy a little. "Well, that's what this is for. Just relax, if you're calm, you won't blank out and stutter. Okay?" He settled their hands down on Dib's lap. "Now, take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Keep doing that while you relax your shoulders and hands. Take your time, until you feel nice and calm, and ready."

Dib stayed silent after the small bit of advice. Only after a long while did he finally nod his head. His hands slowly eased up as he took a deep breath and let it out in one long exhale. His whole body finally relaxed and after a few more breaths, he lifted his eyes to look at Dwicky. A small, unsure look was still on his face, but he still spoke up despite it. "I'm okay. I really want to do this..."

Dwicky gave the boy a smile and a nod. "Okay, good." He gave Dib's hands a reassuring squeeze before he drew them back. "Now, let's stand up." He rose to stand on his feet, smoothing down his shirt and straightening his tie. "Let's try something simple. Let's say, I'm just some normal, everyday person. Maybe from your neighborhood. And I'm just standing around, maybe watering my lawn." Dwicky made the motion of using a hose on his imaginary lawn. "It's a nice day, and that's why I'm watering my lawn. Yep. Water-water-water."

Dib slowly got off the bed just so he could stand up. He watched Dwicky for a few moments before quickly dropping his eyes to his feet. "I guess I would ask you how your day is..." His hands started to fidget in front of him. "No, I mean. How is your day?" His shoulders slumped and he let out a small sigh. "Something like that. I don't know..."

Dwicky cleared his throat, raising his free hand to cup round his ear "Eh? What's that? I can't hear you over the watering of my lawn. Oh, I do so love to water." He continued on with his wonderful imaginary watering. "How's ma' day been, is that what you said? You should stop mumbl'n." he went on in a horrible hick accent.

Dib quickly lifted his head at the words. His teeth moved out to bite at his lip once more, but instead of it being a nervous reaction, it was more to hide his small bit of laughter. It only took a few quick seconds for him to settle down. He quickly moved his fidgeting hands behind his back so that he could keep his attention on the other. His words were a bit louder the next time he spoke. "I'm sorry. Yes, I did ask how your day has been."

"My day? Well, just terrible, terrible." Dwicky shook his head trying not to grin considering he was supposed to be some upset hillbilly. "The wife is angry, the kids are hungry and I ache in places you didn't even know could, sonny-boy."

Even though Dwicky was trying his best not to grin, Dib was doing a horrible job of stopping himself. It didn't really help the fact that he was trying to take pity on the other at the same time. "That's too bad. I'm sure there has to be something good about your day though, right? It's too nice of a day to dwell on the bad stuff."

Dwicky looked up at that beautiful imaginary sunshine. He raised a hand to shield his eyes. "Yea. Darn nice day." He nodded. "Darn nice day to be water'n ma' lawn. Yeap." He looked back down and continued to do his amazing watering of his lawn. "I suppose the only good thing about today is it's nice water'n weather. Gives me an excuse to be outside from yap'n mouths and scary children." Dwicky winked one eye and looked at Dib with the other. "What about you? What's a purdy thing like yerself doin out here at ma' lawn." He couldn't keep the amused snort in; he was blowing it, but it was too funny not to.

Dib's grin grew just a bit more and he had to avert his eyes to stop himself from laughing again. "Well, I was just out for a walk. I got a bit bored sitting around my house, so I thought I would get out for a bit." He turned his gaze back to the other, the grin still on his face. "Pretty, huh? Do you say such things to all the little boys that come by your lawn?"

"Uh. Hmm." Dwicky tapped his lips and shook his head. "Nope. Just the purdy ones, like yerself." He skiggled his thick brows. "And yer the purdiest little thang dat did come across ma' lawn since ever." He tried to wipe the laughter from his mouth, but a few got out anyway. "I should bless the boredom and the sun for mak'n it such nice walk'n weather, so that fate does make me water ma' lawn so I cans be meet'n a purdy thing like you." Dwicky blinked, not even trying to cover up his horrible grin. "Why don't ya come over here and," he wiggled his brows again "water with me. I'll let ya _touch _ ma' _hose_." There was no saving this situation.

Dib blinked his eyes for a few seconds while trying his hardest to keep the laughter in until it really was no use. His hands moved from behind his back just so he could cover his mouth, trying his best to at least quiet himself in some way, even though the act was ruined already. Dwicky's words had caused a small blush to come over his cheeks, which was slowly fading.  
After a few moments, Dib finally got himself under control and allowed his hands to drop back down to his sides. He cleared his throat just before lifting his eyes back up to look at the other. The grin once again on his face. "Promise?"

Dwicky laughed and shook his head at the horrible hilarity. He raised a hand but there was no stifling the immature laughter. He could only grin and gesture for Dib to indeed come over. "Yes, yes of course." he didn't bother disguising his voice anymore. "Any lawn, anytime."

Dib gladly walked closer to Dwicky, and once he was in front of the man, he raised he arms up so that he could place them behind the other's neck as best he could. He stood up on tip toes just so he could place a kiss on the man's lips, having to tug Dwicky's head down just a bit to hit his mark. Once he pulled back, he smiled a bit and let the other lean back. "So, how did I do?"

"Well," Dwicky wrapped his arms around Dib's waist, still grinning widely "yer the darn purdiest little boy I dun seen. And you have the purdiest kisses I'd dun ever got." He laughed and tugged Dib nearer, leaning down enough to steal a few more kisses but just enough to keep the boy on his tip toes. "I'll stop." he laughed. "That's just frightening." Dwicky chuckled. "You did good. I on the other hand, did horribly. Strangers aren't supposed to tempt boys with fancy things like lawns and hoses." Dwicky snorted in amusement "I was a married man for god's sake!"

Dib fidgeted with the collar of Dwicky's shirt. "It was funny, but I think I like you much better this way." He lowered back down completely on his feet, his eyes traveling up a bit so he could keep them on the other's face. "Although, I wouldn't mind if you tempted me with things. You're not really a stranger, so, it's alright." His smile turned shy. "Of course, if I'm willing, then it's hard for you to try and tempt me."

"Or, of course, very easy. But that's the challenge." Dwicky blinked and then chuckled. "It's not supposed to make sense." He leaned down to place a kiss on the bridge of Dib's nose. "Just means I have to be more creative. Not that I have much to tempt you with." He grinned a little more at Dib. "Unless you actually like lawns and the men who water them."

Dib's smile grew and he slowly pulled back away from Dwicky. "Didn't you know?" He placed his hands behind his back, much like before, while grinning playfully up at the other. "That's just my secret obsession. When I wasn't out hunting down the paranormal, I was out spying on the neighbor down the street. He always used to water the lawn. I loved to video taped him." He bit at his lip for a quick moment to try and stop his laughter from his own words. "It was such a turn on to watch."

Dwicky nearly choked on his laughter, not expecting that at all. He rubbed his nose and mouth with the back of his hand as he coughed laughter. "Dib!" He shook his head, it was strange to hear Dib say dirty things; not that he was complaining. Dwicky coughed into a fist. "I really am a bad influence." He splayed out his hands and shrugged. "I guess I'll go buy myself a nice new, long, thick gardening hose. And put on a really old pair of boxers and undershirt, if I still want to catch your eye. I mean, wow, there's some real _stiff _ competition out there."

The grin never left Dib's face, no matter how serious he tried to be. "There is. You're gonna have to work pretty hard. Although..." He moved forward once more so that he could wrap his arms around Dwicky's waist. His free hands slipped under the back of the man's shirt just so he could rake nails over skin. "...I'd say you've got a pretty good head start. Wouldn't you?"

Dwicky sucked in a sharp breath of air, "_Nails_." he spoke with a start. They mustn't clip the boy's nails often, since they would only end up in sleeves. He exhaled breathlessly, his startled look turning to a grin. "Wow. Y-yea. Definitely." He slipped his arms loosely around the boy, gripping the thick fabric of the coat to tug the boy closer. "If all it takes to woo kids these days is a pair of stained boxers and a fresh green, well kept lawn." he leaned down to press lips against the boy's ear, murming on "I'm game." He playfully bit at the rim of Dib's ear.

Dib's hands had fallen with Dwicky's startled voice. When lips were pressed to his ear though it had his hands quickly rising once more to lightly scratch at skin. Small whimpers came from him as he leaned towards the other's mouth. The small bite caused the noises to become louder and he finally buried his face against Dwicky's shirt to muffle the sounds as best he could. "No fair..." As pathetic as the words sounded, it was obvious Dib really didn't want it to stop.

Dwicky lightly hummed against the ear he kept in his mouth, sucking it thoroughly to enjoy the sounds Dib tried to muffle against his shirt; enjoying the pathetic little whines more. He tugged the straitjacket up from the boy's waist, dragging nails up against the skin, leaving bright pink trails against the pale skin. Immediately Dwicky regretted it, remembering he couldn't mar Dib's skin. He released Dib's ear, licking along the rim's curve softly. He had to be gentle, they had to be careful. "I know it isn't."

Dib pressed even closer at the contact against his skin, and before Dwicky could pull away completely, he turned his head just so he could press his lips against the man's own. His hands refused to fall from the other's back even as he pressed roughly into the kiss, sneaking his tongue out to lick at lips. If anything, his hands fell lower to Dwicky's hips, nearly clawing past the waistband of the man's pants.

Dwicky groaned as he had to be the one with the good sense to stop; probably because he wasn't the one with the raging hormones. He snatched Dib's hands from his hips and tugged them forward. Though he couldn't resist capturing Dib's mouth a moment, and roughly met the other's tongue with a sound he tried to muffle. He broke the kiss, pulling away with a regretful sound. "C'mon, let's get back to work. You said you needed to do this." Though he had to chuckle, he didn't know who looked more disappointed.

It was hard for Dib not to pout at those words, but he did give in. A small sigh came from him as he looked away towards the wall while letting his hands drop back down to his sides. "Fine. I do want to get better at this stuff." He lifted his eyes a bit to look back at Dwicky. "It's easy now because you're helping me, but do you really think it will be as easy when I try and talk to people I don't really know? This is completely different from the real thing."

Dwicky easily nodded "Of course, it just takes practice when dealing with people. Everyone is different and reacts differently to different situations... differently. Uh... yea." He smiled slightly. "All it takes is finding a common ground." He smoothed out a hand in a horizontal gesture. "As soon as you find that ground, it's an easy walk. But don't stress out. Some people are more difficult than others, but as long as you stay civil and don't get angry, you'll get out on top." The man tilted his head to the side, "Any particular situation you want to try?"

Dib kept silent for a bit longer after the question until he finally let out a small sigh. He stepped back a bit so that he could sit on the edge of the bed, his hands fidgeting as they settled on his lap. "I'm not too sure. There's so much that could happen once I get out of here. You make it all sound so simple, but I know it's harder than that. It has to be." He kicked his feet idly as he continued to talk. "What if I continue to disappoint my dad? Or, what if everyone at Skool starts to talk behind my back even more than before?" His eyes widened a bit. "What if I can't stop fighting with Zim?"

Dwicky rubbed his goatee a moment, considering Dib's words, and he could only shake his head and offer an empathetic sort of smile. "I'll admit children are cruel. They're judgmental, critical of people much more than anything in the real world. Skool is like, its own society" he twirled a finger in a stirring motion. "But it's only six hours. You're there for yourself, and your education, right? As for that i _Zim /i _ kid…" Dwicky petered off, crossing his arms as he looked to the wall sternly in thought. "Go to a skool where he isn't. Out of sight," he put out one hand weighingly "out of mind," he put out his other hand in the same motion "right?" He brought both hands together palm to palm. "You have to be strong, firm, with yourself and others." Dwicky's expression softened, as did his voice. "I know you don't want back here again."

Dib quickly shook his head at those last few words. "No, I don't." His wide eyes lowered and fell halfway as he looked down at his hands, which were still moving around. "I didn't think things would ever get better. I never want to be back here if I ever do get out. I'm sure I can handle things. Even if I do have to put up with the teasing or if I have to put up with Zim, I'm sure I can just ignore both." He lifted his eyes just a bit so that he could look at Dwicky. "I see no reason for me to have to go to a different skool just because I don't like someone. I've dealt with him before I'll learn to deal with him when I get out. Things will just be a bit harder, I guess..."

Dwicky gave a slightly disapproving look. "Why not avoid just avoid a problem to start..." He shook his head. "And not to point fingers or anything, Dib, but.." he loosely gestured about themselves "your previous dealts with Zim haven't exactly gotten you very far. I'd advise you to stay away from that kid. He's bad news, and will only sink you. And you don't want to lose what you've gained, right?"

Dib dropped his head back down. "It's hard though. What if I can't just up and switch to another skool? What if I actually have to go to the same one that Zim will be going to?" His hands moved out of his lap as he spoke and laid down on the mattress beside him. "All of the fighting we used to do, I guess I was wrong for starting all of it. I mean, if what you say is true about none of it being real. All of it was for nothing and suddenly the one thing I thought was something else is actually a perfectly normal person." His voice fell lower. "How do you deal with something like that? I can't ignore that, can I?"

That had the man swallowing hard, though silent. And Dwicky was glad for Dib's fallen gaze because he could feel his Adams apple bob with such a guilty motion, and he knew he had the worst expression on his face, matching the one he felt in the center of his stomach.  
Quickly Dwicky's hand rose to his mouth, the motion meant to look thoughtful but really he was wiping the grimace off his lips. "Well. I wouldn't worry about it. Just... just move on. He was a nasty kid anyway. Put him behind you. Put it all behind you." He walked over to Dib, faltering a moment before he removed his hand from his own face and pet the scythe lock upon Dib's head before resting it atop it. "There are just some people who get to us, push our buttons without really trying. It's best to avoid them." He pet the boy's head. "There's other skools. Just make sure he isn't in that one before attending. I'll help, if needed."

The hand on his head soothed Dib's worries for at least the moment. He gave a small nod without disturbing Dwicky's hand before answering, still in that same low voice. "You're right. It's kind of like starting from scratch. When I get out of here I can just act like I didn't even know him. That would be best, I suppose." His hands gripped at the mattress just a bit. "It feels so strange to say that though. I said I didn't want to change and yet it seems like I'm gonna have to. At least it's not really me going to be me that's changing and just things around me." A small noise came from him after those words. "I guess..."

Dwicky gave a small chuckle as he popped himself down to sit by Dib, minding the boy's hand. His own fell down to the back of Dib's head, toying at the hair before pulling back to the man's lap with the other. He neatly linked his hands together, looking ahead of himself. "It's called 'growing up'." He then looked at Dib.

Dib glanced to the side at Dwicky before looking back down. "This isn't growing up. Growing up doesn't usually involve staying in a cell and telling my problems to a counselor who I would rather be making out with." He quickly shook his head to try and get rid of the blush that came to his face after his own words. "No, I don't really think I ever grew up. If leaving here and going back outside to deal with everything out there is going to help me grow up, then I think I'm going to be even more scared. It's too much..."

Dwicky made a soft nervous sort of laugh before he looked back down to his hands, twiddling his thumbs. "Growing up means acknowledging and acceptance of who you are, the world, and the people in it. It's seeing things for what they really are.." He raised his gaze back up to stare at in front of himself, the perfect and clean white padded walls; hadn't it just been over there that he'd pressed Dib against to kiss him away from prying eyes. "It's living your life, and loving yourself. It's finding that one purpose in your life that will make you happy, and fulfilling it. Finding that one person who you want to make happy, because they opened your eyes to who you are, and for once in your life, made you feel something no one else could…You never want that feeling to go... Never." Dwicky slowly closed his mouth, affixed still on that patch of wall. Then suddenly, in the silence, he blinked several times, realizing he'd let his mouth run on. Sitting up, he coughed into a fist and gave a chuckle, trying to rub away the warmth that had grown on the back of his neck. "Er, well, it's more or less what I first said: acceptance and understanding." Dwicky pointed with a slight grin to cover up his embarrassment. "How you go about it, everyones different. If the 'making out' is hindering your progress, well, we can just eliminate the problem." Dwicky grinned playfully and nudged Dib.

Dib had lifted his eyes at some point while Dwicky was speaking just so he could look at the other. It was only when he felt the small nudge at his side did Dib force himself out of his sudden thoughts. A few small, incoherent words came from him before he was actually able to speak. "N-No, it's fine. I'm fine." He moved around on the bed, pulling his legs up so that he was kneeling next to Dwicky. His hands kept him propped up on the mattress as he leaned in closer to the other. "What about the other stuff you said? The stuff after those two things. Are those really important too?"

Dwicky blinked, and much to his displeasure, the warmth crept from his neck and across his cheeks. "H-huh?" He smiled to cover up his nervousness, but it didn't work well. He gave a half chuckle. "Which, which other stuff? Uh, yea. Yea, I guess so. Whatever I said." Dwicky leaned back a little and rubbed the back of his neck again. "Yea." He blinked, smiling just that much more blankly. "What?"

Dib gave a small pout at how clueless Dwicky seemed to be in such a short amount of time, but he easily let it go. "The things you said after. About finding a purpose in life. About finding one person that I would want to make happy because they made me feel something no one else could." After the words left his mouth he leaned in just a bit closer to the man. "Is all of that really important too? Just as important as anything else?"

Dwicky's lips pressed together into a thin line and his eyes grew a little wider. "Well, yea, it's important. To me, it's important." His eyes grew wider and he tried to advert them anywhere but on Dib, but failed miserably. "I mean, not everyone needs someone to make them feel whole. But, some, like to love...-and... be... loved." Slowly, he settled his gaze back on Dib, wishing his cheeks weren't so hot. Dwicky's mind completely dead panned "Yea, purposes are good." he added with a lame smile.

"I need all of that." The words were almost a complete whisper as Dib said them. He watched Dwicky for a few more seconds, still refusing to pull back. He chewed at his bottom lip before a few more quiet words came from him. His expression was nervous as he spoke. "I want to be loved." He finally closed the space between them just so he could press his forehead against Dwicky's own. His eyes locked on the other's the entire time. "But only if I have someone to love..."

Shaky hands rose to touch shaky fingers against Dib's cheek, stroking across until palm rested in their stay. Dwicky quietly wetted his lips, parting them but it was a silent moment before he spoke, so very hushed, in sincere offering "I'll love you." His thumb softly ran along the boy's cheek as his breath grew heavier. _"I love you_." he barely managed to whisper, pressing his lips to Dib's.

Dib responded eagerly to the kiss, letting out a small muffled noise as he did so. His own hands moved from the mattress to rise up and lightly rest behind Dwicky's head. His fingers ran through the man's hair as he started to lick at lips until he pulled away just enough so he could speak. "I love you." The echoed words that came from Dib had him grinning before his mouth was once again on Dwicky's, not giving the man much time to breathe.

It didn't matter, Dwicky pulled Dib onto his lap with breathless reaction, needing the boy to be gathered up tightly in his arms, against his chest. He rubbed Dib's shoulder blades as he returned the kiss firmly against Dib's mouth. Dwicky couldn't stop grinning against Dib's lips, though it made kissing a little awkward, it only grew more playful. With each new heated kiss of affection Dwicky could only chuckle with elation. He quickly gave up Dib's lips in favor of marking other places of the boy's pale skin with his lips. Dwicky only stopped when his lips rested against the boy's ear, softly breathing warmth on it. Fingers ran through the boy's dark hair, while Dwicky's other hand cupped the boy's cheek keeping him close. He drew his lips lower to Dib's lobe. "I love you, Dib." he whispered louder this time. He swallowed thickly, wanting to say more, but instead he placated himself with petering slow endearing kisses down the side of Dib's neck.

Hearing the words again only had the smile from before growing on Dib's face. Each soft touch and small kiss had little noises coming from the boy's lips that were more than pleased. He tried his best to keep himself quiet by chewing at his lip, but at the same time he didn't really want to; much too happy at the moment to really care. His fingers continued to run through Dwicky's hair, even as the man kissed down his neck and he couldn't help but say the words again as well, but in his own playful way. "I love Dwicky, and he loves me." After the words left his mouth, he leaned his head down so that he could bite lightly at the man's ear, much like what was usually done to himself.

"Mmph." Dwicky slid his tongue across the crook of Dib's neck. He gave a soft chuckle at the boy's words, muffling it slightly against the boy's skin. Needily, he tugged the boy closer, clinging to the small body in the straight jacket. Of all places, and times for this to happen. Of all locales, and people to be saying such things to. But it felt so good just to hold the boy, to feel fingers through his hair, and that mouth on his ear. It all had Dwicky making audible happy murrs against Dib's neck, kissing and softly sucking, doing his best not to mar the boy's skin. He softly stroked the back of the boy's neck, murming pleasant agreements happily.

Dib easily pressed closer to Dwicky. His feet had been lying prone beside the man and slid out just so he could hook them behind Dwicky's waist. The small noises he made never let up and, if anything, got a bit louder with the bit of sucking on his skin. In playful retaliation, Dib bit down the man's ear until he got to the small, gold piercing. His tongue darted out to gently lick the stud before he let his teeth bite below it once more. Each sound that escaped his lips never once let up the entire time.

Dwicky clapped a hand over his mouth, muffling his own noises as he closed his eyes a moment; though he should have put a hand to Dib's mouth instead. Slowly, he removed the hand from his mouth, placing a finger on his own lips to give a rather giddy sort of 'shhh'; more for himself than anything. Dwicky turned, dumping them both on the bed, Dib on his back, himself atop. He carefully pulled his ear from the boy's mouth before grinning down at him. "You're a bit of a noise maker." and Dwicky was completely good with that, it was just the circumstances.

Dib had pulled his hands back just a bit once he was laying down, allowing them to grip at the front of Dwicky's shirt instead. He gave a shy smile at the other's words and averted his eyes for a second until the blush that decided to come across his face finally went away. "It's hard trying to stay so quiet. It all feels so good. I can't help it." He gave a tiny whimper after he spoke and pulled Dwicky down by his shirt so that he could press their lips together, muffling any other sound he would have made.

Dwicky easily gave into the kiss, resting down atop Dib, just enough to be near the boy and not squish him. He kissed him a moment before breaking it with an amused grin. "See, it isn't so bad to make out with your counselor, is it?" He let his tongue slip out to lick the middle point of Dib's top lip.

Dib couldn't stop his own grin at that. "Not at all." His hands moved to toy with the tie that Dwicky always insisted on wearing. "I enjoy it a lot actually." He stayed silent for a few moments after those words, his hands moving away from the tie to trace over a few buttons. His eyes had dropped down to watch his own movements until finally he spoke up once again, the small bit of playfulness from before gone from his voice. "I don't feel worried anymore. I mean, not like I did earlier. It's like all of that stuff is somewhere in the back of my mind really deep now. I know I still have so much to deal with, but at the same time I just don't feel the need to worry over it." He raised his eyes back up just a bit. "Is that okay?"

Dwicky let his head fall down, resting his forehead against Dib's. He smiled, giving a soft amused sound akin to a chuckle. He smoothed a thumb across the boy's cheek, playing at the shaggy hair that hung from the boy's bangs. "What do you think?" he spoke quietly. The truth was quite obvious from the smile that never left Dwicky's lips, which he touched against Dib's for the briefest of encouraging seconds.

Dib gave a small noise against Dwicky's lips that was easily silenced. His hands, after toying with each button, suddenly gripped the man's shirt once again. For just a split second his eyes closed as he enjoyed the sensation, but it was all over much too quickly and had him giving a pathetic whimper. Despite the fact Dwicky refused to let the kiss go on, that didn't stop Dib from letting his tongue move out to lick at the man's lips, if just to tease him.

Dwicky made an amused sound as he kissed the boy's tongue, darting his own to give Dib's a small lick. He pushed himself higher up on arms giving a small laugh. "You really are encouraging." With a groan Dwicky pushed himself up to kneel, still straddling the boy's middle. Glancing at the door he quickly smoothed his ruffled hair back only to pull back the darker shirt's, that he wore under his white office shirt, sleeve to check the time on a watch he wore. "And have no sense of time." Dwicky rubbed his cheek, gawking at what he saw. Soon he rubbed his mouth and goatee, tapping his chin with his middle finger. He glanced at Dib with a narrow eyed mischievousness. "Ya'know, I've been here over an hour." he alluded.

Dib blinked his eyes at the information before turning a small, cautious glance towards the door. "They should have come for you by now." He turned his eyes back to Dwicky while moving his arms so that he could prop himself up on his elbows. "That doesn't make any sense. Not that I'm complaining." He let his eyes fall once more as he started to become nervous. "It's just weird. I don't think they would really let you stay in here past what you're supposed to. Not unless you asked like last time."

A deviously wide, toothy grin was Dib's only reply.

Dib glanced back up and the look on Dwicky's face had him blinking his eyes once more. "What?" It took a few seconds for him to realize what could cause the other to grin like that and it had Dib's eyes widening just a bit. "You're going to be able to stay again? You asked?" He took another look at the door as if it wasn't true and the same orderly would suddenly come bursting in at any moment. "They agreed?"

"M. Not, quite." Dwicky teetered on his words, glancing at the door as well. "But to a greater extent." He pursed his lips and exhaled, only to smile widely looking back down at the boy. "You'll see. But, for the most part," he pointed a finger "I can stay as long as I need." and he poited Dib's nose with the same finger, dotting his sentence.

Dib scrunched up his nose when it was poked, his eyes going cross-eyed for a few seconds before they moved back to Dwicky's face. "You're teasing me again." He let one of his arms move up just so he could grab Dwicky's hand in his own. "So, if they're letting you stay as long as you need then it's up to you when you want to leave, right?" He placed his own hand up against the man's, keeping it there for a few seconds before he clasped their hands together. "Do you want to leave yet?"

Dwicky watched their hands, the difference in size was less so horribly noticeable with his fingers tangled with Dib's. He squeezed the boy's hand, raising it high enough so he could kiss those small, pale knuckles in between his own. "I don't. Of course I don't." He brought their hands to rest against his chest, kept there by his other. "Though, I can't stay the night today… because of tomorrow." Dwicky made a happy sound as he smiled again. "You'll like tomorrow, definitely." He placed a finger on Dib's lips shushingly. "But don't ask, you'll have to wait till then."

Dib gave Dwicky a questioning glance that soon faded as a grin spread on his lips despite the finger that was resting on them. He did as told, keeping his questions to himself, but that didn't stop him from opening his mouth to capture Dwicky's finger between his lips. He sucked at the long digit before his tongue slowly started to lick around it. The whole time his eyes stayed glued to Dwicky's face.

The man let out a low sound from his throat, his eyes shifting shut. He exhaled slowly, as his shoulders fell slack. Slowly his other fingers uncurled, stroking against the boy's cheek for a brief moment until the energy was seemingly sucked away by Dib's mouth. Dwicky lowered their clasped hands onto Dib's stomach, resting them there. His thumb brushed against Dib's bottom lip, but fell still. Dwicky couldn't manage to say anything, but a few low incoherent sounds at Dib's tongue. He could only stare dazedly back at Dib.

Dwicky's reaction only encouraged Dib to continue. His tongue twisted around, leaving a wet trail as he slowly pulled the finger from his mouth. He refused to pull it completely away, and continued to suck at the tip. Allowing his teeth to nip at it just so his tongue could move out to lick a second after. Just before he pulled his mouth completely away, he gave a small kiss to the abused finger. The grin that had been on his lips before was back in place.

Dwicky gave a low groan, his eyes shutting a brief moment before slowly opening to look down at his freed finger. He gave a small disappointed noise that it had left Dib's mouth, and he barely stretched the slack fingers on his hand. "...Damnit." he barely moaned as his brows furrowed.  
Dwicky wasted no time and leaned back down to slam his lips back down on Dib's. Needily he slipped his tongue into the boy's mouth, roughly licking teeth to meet the other's. He tried so hard not to bite Dib's lips, or tongue, to not mash teeth together but his restraint was running horribly thin.

Dib gave a surprised noise at the sudden kiss, but the noise was easily quieted as he responded to the press of lips. He opened his mouth, letting Dwicky slip his tongue inside just so he could run his own along it. He refused to stay still during the kiss. His free hand moved up to bury itself back in the man's hair while he pressed closer to the larger body. Each sound he made at the contact was muffled by the rough kiss.

Dwicky pinned their twined hands above Dib's head, pressing the boy further into the mattress with each hard kiss. His free hand dug fingers into the mattress, gripping it with the building frustration. His groan was barely muffled against Dib's mouth as he pulled away, lashing his tongue against the other's, against the boy's lips before returning to his own mouth. "Damnit." Dwicky muttered off handedly to himself, his words horribly husky and almost inaudible. "I should have waited another four years to come back." But that didn't stop him from running his tongue against the boy's teeth, coaxing the boy's tongue out.

Dib blinked dazed half lidded eyes up at Dwicky only giving a small noise at the words he had said. It was all he could do before his tongue was moving out to slide along and past the other's lips. He gave a small moan as he pressed hard into another kiss. His teeth bit at the man's lips a few times. He only pulled away when he needed to breathe, but still let his lips linger on Dwicky's skin. Kissing a small trail down the man's chin even in his breathless state.

Dwicky rested his head atop Dib's heavily, catching his own breath. He closed his eyes to feel the weak pattern the lips left on his skin, causing a tingle up his spine that spread inside his stomach.  
In that breathless moment, it washed over Dwicky's placid mind in an over whelming realization of just how much he loved the boy, there and then. His numb fingers still locked with Dib's squeezed the boy's hand. Weakly, Dwicky pressed a slow meaningful kiss on the bridge Dib's nose, swallowing audibly after, still out of breath.

Dib gave a small smile against Dwicky's skin at the kiss to his nose. He couldn't help the tiny pleased noise that came from him at every little thing that had just happened. His fingers that had taken to gripping at the man's hair during the kiss began to run smoothly through the dark mess. Dib gave one last small lick to Dwicky's skin before pulling back just a bit to speak. "Will I really like tomorrow? More than everything that happened today?" It was so hard for him to keep the smile off of his face.

Dwicky gave a gentle chuckle, shutting his eyes as he was lulled by the fingers through his hair. "Today... would be pretty hard to top." His voice was still somewhat hoarse and he cleared his throat lightly before he continued to speak. "But I think so. Yea, I know you will. Definitely."  
The man shifted, sliding down Dib's body so he wouldn't squish the boy when he rested himself down, and so he could rest his head against the boy's upper chest. He gave a happy exhale when he was settled, resting a hand on the boy's chest as well, his fingers tracing the buckles there. "I hope so." Dwicky glanced up at Dib with another chuckle.

Dib continued to move his hand through Dwicky's hair even as the man moved down, finding the action calming even to himself. He met the man's eyes before letting them fall down to the buckles on the jacket. "I'm sure I will. I have to admit I'm anxious to find out what's so special about tomorrow." His tongue darted out of his mouth for a few seconds, the fingers on his hand that was still held twitching a bit. "It must be something really good. I wish you could tell me." He gave a small pout hoping that would cause Dwicky to do so.

The man only narrowed his eyes in good humor up at Dib; though in all honesty he would have loved to tell the boy right there and then, he truly was a sucker for that pout, but.. "You said you wanted to wait." Dwicky grinned tiredly, his thumb running lightly against the other's having felt the twitch of Dib's fingers. "So you'll have to wait."

That only caused Dib to pout more while giving a small whine. "I know, but you're making it difficult." He let a small sigh escape him, finally giving in and letting his eyes move back up and away from the buckles. "Fine, you win. Besides, it wouldn't be much of a surprise if I knew what was going to happen. I think I like it better this way." His hand moved down away from Dwicky's hair just so he could stroke lazy fingers over the back of the man's neck. "So now I have even more to look forward to tomorrow."

Dwicky's eyes fluttered shut, relaxing just that much more against Dib. He gave a lazily answered 'mhm' from his throat. His thumb slowed with his breath, and eventually his motions stopped altogether as he laid far at ease.

Dib blinked his eyes at the sudden still of the body on top of him. He thought about trying to get Dwicky's attention by speaking, but at the last second he stopped. Instead, he let his eyes travel to the door, giving the small window a cautious gaze. Satisfied after a few moments that no one was going to burst in, he looked back at Dwicky. His hand moved down to grip the man's shirt, clinging just a bit. He brought their clasped hands around to rest under his own chin just so he could nuzzle them before he closed his own eyes.

Dwicky slowly opened his eyes a crack, coming face to face with the blurry image of his watch. Blinking his eyes open enough to see the watch more clearly. The time only brought a frown inside Dwicky. He had been here an especially long time, even with all things in consideration. Eventually an orderly would have to at least check on them, and they weren't in the most proper of positions, unfortunately. But he didn't want to mooove. He glanced up to Dib; how could he disturb _that _ peaceful expression, especially since less than a week ago he'd never expect to see Dib this relaxed.

Dib only clung tighter to Dwicky's shirt with the small bit of movement he felt. A tiny protest came from his lips, but it was rather incoherent. He easily pulled their hands closer, if possible, and let out a small sigh as he did so.

It was hard to argue with that, and for the most Dwicky relented, keeping as still as he could atop the boy. They could stay like this a little longer. Dwicky let his eyes shut, giving in, but he kept his ears open to listen for any noise or shuffle in the halls.

It was later that the sound of footsteps down the hall would soon become louder as they neared the door. The noise stopped as it reached the exact cell the two lay in at that moment. There were hushed voices as the person on the other side spoke with the two lazy guards that always sat outside the door; a few frustrated words spoken here and there, then finally the sound of each small button on the lock just to get inside.

Dwicky's eyes snapped open wide as instant fear washed over him at the musical sound of buttons pressed. He must have fallen asleep, he hadn't heard the approaching footsteps, and now he was going to pay for being so blatantly uncareful. Instantly, he pushed himself off Dib, scrambling off the bed. Shirt, tie, hair, all were straightened and smoothed down. Quickly, he leaned over the bed again, shaking the boy, trying to retain a silent voice but the panic didn't help "Dib, wake up, Dib. Sit up. They're here."

Dib gave an annoyed sound at being woken up in such a way. He tried to grab the body that was once on top of him, but noticing there was nothing there, he gave another small sound before finally sitting up. One of his hands moved up to rub at groggy eyes and before he could even say a word, the door to the room finally opened causing all of his attention to move towards it instead of Dwicky.

It wasn't the same orderly that usually came to grab Dwicky, though the nurse that walked into the room instead still didn't look any bit as pleased. She settled her eyes on Dwicky, her gaze narrowed as if it was his fault she had to be in there. "It's been over five hours. You need to get going if you aren't staying." She turned her eyes on Dib and scowled a bit. "You weren't supposed to let him out of that."

Dwicky's mind could be heard shattering into little pieces at the news, and the grumpy look of the scary nurse. He raised his wrist up to glance at his watch and he whistled. "Oh, my, lookit that. How time flies." He gave a nervous laugh as he ran a hand through his hair, lowering his hand back to his side. Quickly, his eyes flicked to Dib as well. "Well, I thought it best if we gave having his arms loose some practice. Ya know," he glanced at the nurse, clearing his throat "with tomorrow and all. It's alright though, he was under my complete supervision. All went quite well." Dwicky gave a smile that was meant to please. He looked back to the boy "Right, Dib?"

Dib had been keeping a nervous eye on the nurse the entire time she spoke, but as soon as Dwicky spoke his name, it caught the boy's attention. He turned his eyes back to the man and easily nodded his head, allowing a small smile to form on his face. "That's right." He glanced back at the nurse, the nervous expression gone. "I was fine. Everything was okay."

That didn't seem to help the nurse's attitude at all. She gave them each a small look before rolling her eyes. "Whatever." She let her eyes fall back on Dwicky and gave an aggravated noise before speaking. "Strap him back up. You need to leave now."

Dwicky gave another smile to completely hide his nervousness. He gave a nod. "Yes, ma'am." Obediently he sat by Dib and took one of the boy's arms and began to unravel the sleeve, one after the other. He gave Dib a more sincere smile than he did the nurse as he worked. "You did very well today, Dib. We made great leaps and bounds today." Dwicky tried to keep his grin to a minimal at the double meanings his words could have. "Turn around, please." He smoothed the rumpled fabric he'd unfolded.

Dib easily obeyed, turning around so that his back was facing Dwicky. The man's words had his smile growing a bit, but he tried to hide it behind the jacket's collar. The nurse in the room caused him to fidget just a bit, despite the fact Dwicky was messing with his hands. Though he did allow the other to strap him back in. No real protests came from his mouth, unlike how he would have acted so many other times.

Dwicky did up the last of the belts and dusted his hands off after to prove he was done. "There we go." He stood up from the bed. "Alright, Dib, I'll see you tomorrow bright and early." He smiled wide, still managing to feel optimistic and excited despite the damper the nurse brought. "Be good, and get a good rest tonight. Okay?" He walked a few steps to the door.

Dib turned around completely on the bed so he could watch Dwicky leave. Though he really wished he didn't have to. He still managed a small smile at the man's words and the thoughts of the next day. He gave a nod before speaking, his voice quiet if only because of the nurse. "Alright, I will." He took one quick glance at the nurse and immediately hid his face in the jacket after.

The nurse tapped her foot, and only when Dwicky was finally near and out the door did she quickly shut it and allow the lock to click back in place. "Finally..." The word was mumbled under her breath and without even waiting for the man to follow, she turned on her heel and made her way back down the hall, assuming Dwicky would come along.


	10. Sessions 10

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

**By Kitteh and NeoFox**

**Rating** PG 13

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 10

In a small white room one can never quite tell just what time of day it truly is. When the segments of someone's day are categorized into 'light - day time, you are awake', 'dark - night time, you are asleep', all the rest of life can easily fall into the cracks of horrible simplicity. Only the visits of orderly giving medication or feeding meals truly dictated the hour, like the notches in a clock, perfect and scheduled.

But once and a while, on the rarest of occasion, something in the air would reveal something about the change of 'Outside'.

Today the air was damp, unpleasant and hung heavy like a cold, stifling breath against a window. The halls were filled with hollow laments of patients complaining they were 'too cold today', although the temperature hadn't changed one degree all week. It was raining outside, a heavy pouring, and although the thick walls and heavy padding kept and muffled the ghostly moanings of lonely misery, it didn't keep out the melancholy ache of bones.

The cell that housed what could be considered to some as a miracle patient had been visited by the normal regulars that were forced to do their duties. It had been some time since Dib had woken up, at least in his mind, and he hadn't moved from his spot on the bed the entire time since the last nurse had disappeared from his room. His eyes stayed trained on the small, little window across from him, patiently waiting for only one other person to come through. Though there were other muffled sounds on the other side of the door that at times caught his interest, he slowly ignored them. He was too anxious about other words from the day before.

It wasn't long before the last sounds of feet leaving down the hall from Dib's room dissipated into nothingness. It was silent then, no sound save for the _something _ that would echo itself into oblivion, only to return just as indistinguishable and subtle as before. Even the unseen light source that kept Dib's room lit seemed dull and lifeless in its mood. And every so often the dull hum it made flitted more audibly from its white noise.

'_He's not coming_.' doubt spoke itself to Dib. Doubt, just doubt, everyone had doubts. That was perfectly normal.

The words had Dib closing his eyes. He refused to speak out, refused to even acknowledge that the words had been said. All he did was give a small shake of his head before he let his eyes open once more. His gaze fell back on the window and he once again kept his attention on it, despite how quiet it had gotten.

_'Traffic.'_ Dib's doubt continued to surmise._'Or, something far more important.'_

Doubt was normal, everyone had doubts.

_'Even Dwicky has doubts.'_ the train of thought cut in._'It's alright to think, and doubt. It doesn't hurt to talk back to your doubts. That's what 'thinking' is. 'Thinking' is talking to yourself. Isn't it?'_

_'He's probably busy with his real life; visiting family, playing with his pet, doing his taxes. Catching up with those things he puts off to be with me.'_ the doubt finished its thought.

Dib opened his mouth as if to speak back, but at the last second he stopped himself. His mouth quickly closed shut and he dropped his gaze from the window down below him to the bed. Instead of speaking, he gave a small, irritated noise at each thought that went through his head, his excitement over the day was suddenly gone at everything that was being thrown at him in that one moment.

_'I don't want to think about that right now, do I? No. No I don't._ the doubt spoke on.

_'Think about things that make me happy. Yes. That's what Dwicky said, didn't he? Happy things.'_

_  
'Dwicky is probably doing happy things right now. So happy, he must have just forgotten. That's not a crime, right?'_

_'He's allowed to forget about me, right?'_

_'What happy thing shall I think about?'_ _  
_

The last few things said finally had Dib speaking up. His voice so quiet it might as well have been a whisper in the large room. "He didn't forget." His eyes fell halfway, but kept on the mattress. "He said he loved me yesterday. He wants to love me. I've never had that before. Hearing that and feeling that made me happy." His eyes closed all the way and a small sigh escaped him. "I'm always going to remember that. He won't forget me, I know it."

_'He. He. He. He. What about me? If he was going to be late he should have called. If he 'loved' me he would have called the asylum to pass the message to me.'_

_'What kind of sick idiot loves little boys in asylums'_ A hushed voice hissed in the back of Dib's mind. It could have been doubt, it could have been the hum of lights; it wasn't the voices again, it couldn't. The medicine was stopping them. He was taking the medicine like a good boy now.

_'Think about things I like, think about things I like.. I like, I like, I heart..-'_ _  
_

"Dwicky..." The name fell from his lips in a small, pathetic voice. He tried his hardest to ignore the doubt, the small voice that was nagging him. He didn't understand why it wouldn't work. Why he couldn't push it away. "He said I would really like today. He wouldn't forget. He's just late. I don't have any reason to doubt." He pulled his knees up as best he could, huddling up much like he would so many times before. "He might not have been able to call. He probably couldn't let me know."

_'Ya know what I really like? Buggys. Little ones, little tiny red ones. They look like they're wearing little red coats with little black polkadots.'_

_'They open their little jackets and fly away on itty bitty hidden wings.'_

_'You know... who else looks kind of like a bug..'_ a whispered suggestion followed suit.

Dib seemed to calm down a bit at the first few thoughts that were spoken in his head. His closed eyes opened back up just a bit and his body seemed to relax. He wasn't granted the feeling for long though as the small last few words were spoken. His body went rigid and he quickly shook his head. "No, he doesn't. None of that was real. I have to remember that."

_'Bug antenna.'_

_'Buggy eyes.'_

_'Buggy greeny leaf skin.'  
_

_'The buggy wore the people costume, not the people wore the buggy costume.'_

_'Dwicky is a liar, liar, liar, liar, liar.'  
_

_'... He's.. not coming?'_ Doubt spoke up once again, such a pathetic and lonely thought.

"Yes he is..." Though the words still sounded pathetic even as Dib said them. "I have to trust him. He's not a liar. I know he's not a liar." He allowed his eyes to travel up and land on the small window once more. Wishing that at any moment the one he was so worried over would come through the door at any second. "Everything that happened. He wouldn't lie to me. He has no reason to lie to me. He's trying to help me get better and I do feel better. He wouldn't hurt me..."

_ 'Little teeny tiny white spots, like eyes, on their itty bitty black heads. But, they never had white spots on their pretty red coats. Some were even orange, or even yellow.. those ones were so small-'_

_'Baby lady bugs.'_

_'So small, they looked so fragile.'_

_'Precious.'_

_'So very tiny.'  
_

_'I could hurt them just by touching them too hard.'  
_

"Shut up..." The words were more of a tiny whimper as Dib said them. "I would never hurt them. I just let them crawl on my fingers. I was always too scared of hurting them." He dropped his gaze again just so he could shut his eyes as tight as he could. Another small, broken sound came from him before he spoke again. "I want to see them again. I haven't seen one in a long time. I miss watching them. It's not fair."

_ 'Daddy doesn't love me anymore.' _Doubt whimpered in the small pocket of despair that grew in Dib.

_'You know what else I liked...'_

_'I like aliens.'_

_'The paranormal.'  
_

_'I like it. I miss it. THAT made me happy.'_

_'But dad said its not allowed, not allowed in the house. Crazy boys play that game. I'm not crazy.'_doubt objected. But doubt was exactly that: doubt. And doubt can only go so far, before it becomes denial._ 'Dad doesn't want me to be happy. Dad.. doesn't love me.'_

_  
'I liked aliens.'_

_'I like the paranormal.'  
_

Dib buried his face in his knees at each of the small hurtful words that clouded over his mind. "I can't like those things anymore. If I like them then I'll be stuck here forever. I'll never be normal. That's all I want. I want to be normal. I don't want to be crazy anymore." There was a crack in his voice, though a bit muffled. "If I don't believe, then Dad can love me. If I don't believe, then everything can be alright again."

_ 'Dib' _he could hear himself, crystal clear and tiny, fragile, questioning in his mind; so fearful of the truthful answer._ 'Do I love the paranormal more than dad?'_

_'We wouldn't be here if-'  
'He wouldn't have been put here if he-'  
'It'll always be there for us to study, and love, and always be there for us, but has dad-?'  
_

The questions had Dib trying to bury his face deeper, trying to hide away from what he had to answer. It wasn't possible though. The questions were in his head. They weren't outside. No one beside himself asked him such things. There was no way he could get away. So, instead of acknowledging the voice and the questions, he stayed silent and hoped that would be the safest solution.

There was a small hush of silence. Barely a moment that one could call peace.

_ 'Dib?' _ doubt spoke through it._'Dib?' _ it repeated again when the boy wouldn't speak_ 'Dib!' _ There was the smallest of torn sounds in the boy's mind._ 'I don't.. do I?'  
_

The small bit of silence had eased Dib, but when his name was spoken again it had his whole body tensing up. Once again he kept his silence towards the question until he just couldn't take it anymore. Slowly, he lifted his face from his knees just a bit so that wet eyes could gaze at the door once again. Though whether they were really looking at it was a mystery. "Dad's always been there for me..." The words sounded so empty, but he kept speaking anyway. "He just wants what's best for me. Believing in something that's fake can't make me happy. When I get out Dad will be there for me. I know he will..."

There was a touch Dib noted against his chin, and he felt his head being raised upwards.

"Dib?" the words were external.

Warm fingers brushed under his eyes, wiping away the wet that trickled when he blinked.

"Of course. You know he will." the warm, familiar voice was accompanied by that ever optimistic smile from the face that now looked down at him. "He's your father, he loves you."

The voice outside of his head had Dib's eyes opening all the way. Another small choked sound came from him as his head was raised and fingers were felt on his skin. He couldn't help but lean into the touch, needing the comfort, needing to hear such words. "He loves me..." The words were echoed just barely, but the doubt that had been in his head was suddenly in his voice. He couldn't help but let out another small noise after the words had left him before burying his face in the hand near his face.

The door Dib had been watching still lay open with Dwicky's entrance, and there a rather impatient orderly that stood in it's thresh hold, arms crossed, foot tapping. But Dwicky didn't pay the other man mind, placing either hand on the boy's face in concern, letting Dib take what he needed from the plutonic touch. "Yes, he does. Your father loves you very much." Dwicky spoke assuringly. "Are you okay, Dib?" he spoke his question in concern but kept the worry out of his voice. "Can you stand?"

Dib blinked his eyes a few times, causing the last stray tears to fall to his cheeks. The questions that were asked didn't really register until a few moments later when he finally gave a weak nod. "Yes, I'm fine." His voice was still quiet though he tried not to sound too upset. "I can stand..." Just to prove his point, he moved his head away from Dwicky's hands so that he could focus his attention on sliding off the mattress. It took a few seconds, but his feet finally touched the hard tile, allowing him to stand on wobbly legs. He shot a small look towards Dwicky before quickly looking down to the floor. "See, I'm okay..."

Dwicky gave a pleased smile, he knew something was wrong, but he didn't press on about it; he'd ask later. Gently, he thumbed the last few tears from the boy's cheeks, since Dib couldn't do it himself. "Good. Because today isn't a day to worry, or be sad. Today is the day you get to go out." He gestured grandly to the open door, though the grumpy orderly standing there didn't help in the effect. "For one day, one night stay." Dwicky added pointedly with a grin. "With myself."

Dib's eyes snapped open and suddenly his worries were pushed aside for the information he was just told. He lifted his head so that he could look at Dwicky's face, trying to see if what the man said was really true. "I get to leave here for a bit? Out there?" His eyes moved to the door and even though the grumpy orderly was standing there, it still didn't keep the excited expression off of his face. "I really get to go outside?"

Dwicky nodded, his grin growing just that much wider. He walked around Dib to the boy's back so he could start unfastening the sleeves from each other. "Under my supervision, of course. You're never to leave my sight. So, stay close to me, alright. Keep calm, the world can be quite exciting if you remember." He had the buckles undone quickly, having become efficient with how often he'd had to undo and redo it. Dwicky walked back around to Dib's front, rolling up the loose sleeves next. "Okay? We just have to get a few of your things at the front desk and then we're off."

Dib nodded his head at each word in silent agreement. As soon as his hands were free it took all of his will power not to tackle and hug Dwicky right at that moment. He only gave the man a small smile instead while his hands fidgeted in front of him. His eyes quickly fell back on the door and slowly the excitement was replaced with a small, nervous feeling. Instead of taking one step towards the door, he took a step back, bumping into Dwicky just a bit in the process.

The man made a soft 'oof' sound before placing his hands on the boy's shoulders. "C'mon, let's go." He encouragingly pushed the boy towards the door, walking him to it.

The tall, thick necked orderly gave them a look, glad they finally were leaving so he could too. The orderly stepped aside to let them through.

Dwicky lead Dib through the cell's door way and out into the long, empty hall to walk. "See. This isn't so bad." He gave an assuring squeeze to the boy's shoulders. "Just breathe, and keep calm."

Dib gave a small noise in response, though quickly took the advice given to him after. His eyes scanned the hall they walked down, taking everything in. The few times he had ever been out of his room he had never really paid much attention to what was around him, not really allowed to, and for once he really wanted to take advantage of the situation. Even if it was just dirty walls and tiled floors that he saw.

They walked down a labyrinth of hallways, the walls lined up with doors much similar to Dib's, of the better behaved, giving glances of other loony boys who lay sleeping their lives away or quietly rocking and muttering incoherent rhymes to themselves.

The orderly lead them through thick metal door after thick metal door, punching in the codes and giving a retina scan and hand print for each. Dwicky had seen it done several times now, and still he was amazed to the lengths they went to keep the crazy in.

Finally, they arrived at the main desk, a huge center with plenty of technology for information and surveillance, though up to date; it looked like the maintenance hadn't bothered to keep things tidy at all for years now. Only one thin secretary sat there, her greying hair tied back in a bun so tightly it seemed to stretch the skin of her pointed face back, keeping the years of sag from her skin. Her mouth moved in a slow constant movement, chewing a piece of gum that was probably as old as she looked. The woman looked from whatever she was reading to Dwicky and Dib, just as unimpressed as the orderly, who walked off once they were there.

Dwicky gave the woman a smile, though it seemed to faze her less; you've seen one pretentious smile, then you've seen them all.

"Mister Dwicky here to pick up Dib's thing for his over night stay. Clothes his father might have left, his medication.."

The woman's eyes flicked from Dwicky to Dib, heavy and piercing like a vulture's.

The sudden intense stare had Dib giving a small frightened noise. He kept his own eyes on the secretary for a few moments before he couldn't take it anymore and moved to hide behind Dwicky. His hands gripped at the man's shirt and he peeked his head out to shoot a narrowed gaze at the woman. As much as he tried to stay calm, it wasn't working in that moment and all he could do was let out a heavy sigh instead of a small breath.

Dwicky blinked to suddenly have a Dib behind him. He glanced down and patted the boy on the head to assure him it was alright.

The woman's eyes narrowed harder on Dib, then she looked back to Dwicky. The secretary's gaze always unsettled him. "I doubt the little crazy is ready to even see the light of day." her voice was as mean as her gaze. "But, it's your problem now Mister Dwicky." With that she raised with many a crick in her bones to head into the back room where all the loving families dumped their loved one's things, wanting to get of them as much as they did the person who owned it.

Dib continued to keep his eyes on the woman as she left, the hand on his head not helping to comfort him. Only when she disappeared did he finally make a small move sticking his tongue out before speaking in a small voice, afraid he would be heard. "I'm not crazy, and I'm not a problem." He gripped tighter to Dwicky's shirt for just a split second after the words left him.

Dwicky ran his fingers through the boy's hair, petting his head as he gave a small chuckle.

It wasn't long before the woman came back, her presence putting both Dwicky and Dib on edge. She placed a duffle bag on the counter non too gently. "This is what they left." The bag looked like it hadn't been touched in years. "Dib's medication is inside. He's already had his morning; he takes one in the afternoon and evening, then sleeping pills at night. Do_ not ,_" she pinned Dwicky down with a hard gaze, her voice turning sharp to hammer him down "miss a dose. The times are written on the package." The woman patted the bag, flicking some dust off it.

Dwicky stared wide eyed at the woman and gave an obedient nod. Gingerly, as if the secretary would lash out and bite his hand, he stepped closer (with Dib in tow) to take the duffle bag.

Dib couldn't help but keep wide eyes on the bag. Everything that was his was in that one bag. That very thought had him wanting to reach out and grab it for himself, but he went against that instinct and kept hold of Dwicky instead. He turned narrowed eyes back on the woman as if it were her fault he had never seen what was inside the bag for so many years, but quickly dropped them back down to the floor after only a few seconds.

Dwicky hefted the bag over one shoulder and stepped away, which was hard considering Dib was clinging right behind him. "Thanks." His smile was anything but assured. "C'mon Dib, let's go." He reached back to place a hand on the boy's shoulder again, coaxing him from behind to walk in front as they headed near the huge exit doors; Dwicky wanted as far from the woman as they could get.

On either side of the huge metal doors a tall, burly guard stood, armed and armored as if standing duty for a war instead of keeping the peace of an asylum; though, Dwicky supposed the place had its share of nasty riots.

Either guard glanced their way though, thankfully they didn't seem to pay either mind like the secretary. If that woman would let them pass, then they were free to go.

One pushed a red, tiny button on the wall marked 'Security only. Bad, don't touch!' The doors, with a hideous groan, parted and slammed themselves open, revealing a small parking lot.

"Oh." Dwicky blinked his eyes, expecting it to be far brighter as he stepped near the thresh hold. "It's still raining." He stuck out a hand to feel a few drops.

Dib had kept his eyes on each guard the entire time until the loud slam that the door made had him jumping a bit in the very spot he stood. His wide eyes moved forward so that he could look outside and all he could do was allow his mouth to hang open for a few quick seconds before a small, quiet sound came from him. He let one of his hands raise like the other so that he could feel some of the small drops fall on it. Unlike Dwicky though, he wasn't at all upset by the weather. In fact, it was hard to stop the smile that was forming on his face as each bit of wetness hit his hand. Every little nervous feeling seemed to have been sucked out of him in that very moment as he stood there trying to slowly grab at each wet drop that fell.

Dwicky took back his hand, shaking it and flicking the wetness off his fingers. The sight beside him had Dwicky smiling. He watched Dib in his carefree moment, awed and joyed by something so usually simple and miserable like rain. Though down his gaze fell to the wet pavement, made shiny by the water that constantly pattered on it. Then Dwicky's gaze fell on Dib's stocking feet. He gave a soft 'oh' on realization; there was a slight problem.

"You need shoes." Dwicky stated as he went to the duffle bag, unzipping it to dig through it. Clothes, random memorabilia, he then made a happy noise at his find. He plucked out from the bag presenting-- shoes that were several sizes too small! Dwicky blinked down at Dib. "Must have gone through a growth spurt."

Dib had pulled his hand back when Dwicky started going through the bag. He didn't even bother to wipe any of the wetness off, too intrigued by what the man was looking for. When he saw it was his shoes that the other pulled out, it had him blinking his eyes in a small bit of surprise at seeing them. Though Dwicky was right, they would never fit him. "So, if I can't wear my shoes, or anything in that bag, then what am I going to do?" A small frown formed on his face. "I don't have anything else."

Dwicky stuffed the shoes back in, nosing through the contents a bit. Everything in there looked too small, as far as he could tell. He zipped the bag back up and adjusted it better on his shoulder. "We'll worry about that when we get to my place. For now, let's worry about your feet. I hope you don't mind getting a bit wet; I was smart and left the umbrella in the car. But, you look small and tote-able." Without waiting for a reply, Dwicky knelt down and scooped the boy off his feet, standing on his own with a grunt. "Hold on tight." He then carried the boy towards the parking lot.

Dib gave a startled noise when there was suddenly no ground under his feet. For a few seconds he struggled before slowly giving in just so he could grip Dwicky's shirt. He easily buried his face in the fabric as a small noise escaped him. His feet kicked every now and then, though not in any kind of protest. "I could have walked..." It was obvious he was grateful for the situation despite the words.

"I didn't want your socks to get wet and cold." Dwicky easily answered, his grip tightening on the boy.

The rain pelted down, cold, but not completely unpleasant. The air was equally cool, and the sky was a murky colour, proving it wouldn't let up its constant down pour anytime soon. Dwicky stopped at the passenger door of a simple white car, it looks like it'd seen many years of use. It needed washing, its white colour completely off white, and even the rain didn't seem to clean it. The man juggled Dib to one arm, sticking out his tongue as he dug through a pocket for his keys. He claimed them with a happy noise, clumsily reaching out to unlock the door for Dib; sadly too poor to afford a car that would unlock at a push of a button.

Dib moved his eyes away from Dwicky's shirt just to watch what the other was doing. His interest was easily kept as the man fiddled with the lock and even as the door was opened. Only when he was ushered into the car did Dib pull his eyes away, instead sitting down in the seat and looking all around the inside. It wasn't all that interesting, especially considering it was just a car, but for someone that had been in a cell for so long, it was something new. Only once did he stop just to shake his head, freeing his hair of each small bit of rain that had clung to it, only to go back to darting his eyes in each direction after.

Making sure all of Dib's limbs were in the car, Dwicky shut the door, heading over to the other side to get in. Closing the door, Dwicky made a relieved sound. "We made it!" He grinned Dib's way, rather amused at the boy's sudden interest in _everything_. "Can you manage your seat belt?" Dwicky mused a little more. He stuck the keys in the ignition just to keep them somewhere he wouldn't forget.

Dib quickly looked over at Dwicky when the question was asked of him. "Um..." His eyes moved over to the strap beside him and he slowly moved a hand up to pull at it. With one simple jerk he clicked it in place, then turned his attention back to Dwicky, a small smile on his face. "Yeah, I can." The excitement came back as he sat there and he couldn't help but start to fidget once again. His hands clenched and unclenched against the seat. "I'm really going to be staying with you? How did you get them to agree to something like this?"

Dwicky pulled his own seatbelt on, clicking it on. He nodded after. "Well," he dragged the sound of that word out as he sat back "remember I said I spoke to your father? Well, he signed a form giving me permission to essentially take you out and about. The form also technically gives me right to take action as I see fit for you, like untying your jacket, or removing it completely." Of course, _other _ implications could be taken with that, but Dwicky tried not to smile too widely. Instead, he started up the car with a turn of the key.

"Removing it?" Dib couldn't help his wide eyed expression at those words. the hands that were lying on the seat lifted to rest on his lap, just so he could turn his attention on them. "He really gave you permission to do all of that?" Slowly, a frown formed on his face and his whole body grew slack. Instead of waiting for any kind of answer, he turned his eyes towards the window beside him and looked back outside and watched the rain that continued to fall.

Dwicky turned his attention out the window and backed the car out, turning to drive them out of the lot. His gaze grazed on the large sign dictating the name and welcome of 'The Crazy House for Boys' as they drove by it. Relief to finally be leaving that place, but best of all with Dib beside him, had a wide smile cheerful smile on Dwicky's face. He then glanced back to Dib, but the boy didn't seem in the best spirits. It wasn't exactly the reaction he was expecting, and it had his smile frowning then too. "Yea, he did. Hm? What's wrong?"

Dib stayed silent after the question was asked, refusing to speak. He continued to keep his eyes on the window until finally he dropped his them back down to his lap. His fingers twisted around each other for a bit in a small show of nervousness. "It's okay to be unsure of things, right? To doubt certain things? To be scared of things?" Even after he finally asked the questions, he still refused to lift his eyes.

Dwicky gave a slow nod as he drove. "It does happen. But.. you shouldn't let it stop you, or what needs to be done. Why?" He glanced again at Dib, then back at the road. "What is it you're worried about?"

"It's hard to explain." Dib's own words had him letting out a frustrated sound before he went on. "I'm worried about things that I know I really shouldn't be worried about. I'm outside. I'm actually out of that place, and yet I'm doubting my dad." One of his hands moved up to move through his hair, needing something to keep himself busy as he spoke about his problems. "I'm wondering if he ever cared. If I ever cared. It all feels so empty. It's not supposed to feel this way. None of it is."

Dwicky nodded. "Why does it feel empty, Dib? Tell me why you think your dad doesn't care, and why you think you don't care. I'm listening." He gestured that he could listen while driving. "What feels empty to you?"

Dib finally lifted his eyes so that he could look Dwicky's way. He only kept them on the man for a few seconds before he turned his attention out the front window, looking at the road ahead. "Everything between us. He's never told me that he cares. He's never told me that he loves me. It's not only him. I've never said the words either." He dropped his head back down. "It's so wrong. Everything about it. I'm at fault too though, right?"

Dwicky made a thoughtful sound. "Some people don't feel comfortable expressing how they feel. It's not a horrible thing, but, you can't always assume someone knows. Ha-ha, we're not telepathic yet." He turned the car at a corner before talking. "It helps to say exactly how you feel, so that there's no miscommunication. You know, talking things through." Dwicky paused thoughtfully. "Perhaps now, after everything, you'll have a chance to tell him everything you've want to. Him too."

Dib shook his head. "That doesn't make any sense though. I'm able to tell you how I feel and talk to you about everything even after all that happened. Yet, it's so hard for me to talk to my own dad." The hand that had been running through his hair off and on finally fell back down to his lap. "Shouldn't it be easier with him? He's my family. I shouldn't be having these thoughts." Another frustrated sigh escaped him. "I don't know..."

Dwicky tried to keep the small laugh inside, but it was hard not to. "I'm a counselor, Dib. I was trained to be open minded, to talk with others about their problems. I don't know if I really count." He shook his head. "Your father is.. um, well.. he's a man of science. I suppose between making up formulas and new kinds of gadgets, he just doesn't know how to really talk about himself, or others. He sets standards for everything and expects people to meet them as well. I guess that's his way with dealing with life." Dwicky blinked, clearing his throat as his cheeks grew warm some. "Or.. maybe I'm looking too deep into things. The point is, there's just going to have to be some adjustments. But you two do have to talk sometime, straighten things out between you." He tilted his head one way and made quotey fingers with one hand " 'Closure'."

Dib gave a small nod at Dwicky's words, though it still didn't seem to satisfy him enough. "I thought knowing that I stopped believing in so many fake things would help. I really was looking forward to seeing him. I thought he would be there yesterday. It's been so long." He lifted his eyes a bit. "Of course, he was never around that much when I was even at home, but either way it still would have been nice." He turned his attention back to Dwicky, a tiny smile coming to his lips. "I guess as long as I know he's at the most pleased with how I'm doing. It does help a bit."

Dwicky nodded "And he is. Very pleased with your progress." He glanced Dib's way to smile a little back at him. "But hey, you still have me." He reached over and brushed his fingers against the boy's cheek before returning it back to the steering wheel. Dwicky set his eyes back on the road, the old windshield wipers complained as they danced back and forth across the front window. "You can always give your dad a call.. from my place." Dwicky spoke slowly, cautiously wondering to himself if that was a good idea. "Reserve him for a visit." his smile was weak; he knew the whole suggestion probably wasn't good at all.

Dib seemed to relax with the small touch that was given to him. His smile grew a bit, though became slightly nervous at Dwicky's suggestion and he looked back down. "I'm not sure. I would probably be too afraid. That probably seems weird since I keep talking about how I want to see him and all that, but I think for the moment I just want to forget about it." He kicked his feet a bit, trying to will away all the nervous feelings inside of him. "I just want to be happy about today. I've been thinking too much about other things. If I do that I won't be able to enjoy all this time I have outside of that place with you."

"Alright. We can talk about all that stuff later. Oh!" Dwicky blinked his eyes wide a moment. "Sorry I was so late today. I went out shopping to pick up a few things, and since I never thought to ask what you liked, it kind of took a longer than I thought." He chuckled nervously. "So, I got a little bit of everything. I didn't think you'd want to eat the baking soda and jar of old pickles I had in the fridge. And it's raining, so, traffic is just terrible."

It could be seen as they drove further into town, the gross amount of drivers, and the slower paced line ups on the roads.

The last few words Dwicky said had Dib's fears from earlier quickly thrown away. At least for the moment. "I-It's okay. I mean, about you being late." He let his eyes roam out the window to watch each car that was in front of them, taking in each small thing that he had been away from for so long. "I'll eat anything, truthfully. Well, almost anything. As long as it's edible." He gave up on watching the cars and instead leaned back in his seat, turning his head so that he could look once more at Dwicky. "Besides, I'm sure whatever you have will be much better than what they would feed me."

Dwicky chuckled, slowing the car to a stop. The line of cars had slowed, and it didn't seem like they would be leaving anytime soon. Considering the weather, it was probably an accident that everyone must stop to gawk at up ahead. It gave Dwicky the chance to turn his full attention to Dib. "What _do _ they feed you there anyway?"

Dib gave a small, disgusted look at the question, his nose scrunched up as he thought over everything that had been given to him to eat. "Mostly soup. It's not really good. It tastes like they blended a bunch of foods together in a blender and called it soup. Sometimes for breakfast I get cereal, but it's stale so it's not that enjoyable." The disgusted look left his face and he shrugged his shoulders before he went on. "They give me sandwiches here and there. Those aren't so bad." He shook his head before letting a small smile come over his face once again. "Doesn't mean I really like any of it though. It's just tolerable."

Dwicky glanced at the other nearby cars; someone on a cell phone, a grumpy old couple and other people just impatiently waiting for traffic to pick up again. The rain veiled everything else. Dwicky shifted subtly closer to Dib in his seat, leaning over a little closer. "Sounds horrible." he chuckled. "I'll keep in mind not to make any of those things. Pasta still good?" He leaned a little more. "We could always order in. Or.." he paused a moment to reach out a hand, his throat dancing with a swallow, to just barely touch Dib's chin "go out." he quietly finished.

Dib gave a small noise at just that one simple touch. His hands once again fidgeted in his lap and it took him a few seconds to actually answer, his eyes darting over Dwicky's face as he did so. "We could go out. I'd like that a lot." He couldn't help but move forward a bit despite how much he knew it was a bad idea not to at the moment.

Dwicky's thumb softly stroked Dib's chin before the rest of his fingers brushed down along the boy's jaw. He softly smiled, it was hard not to when Dib acted like some small, frightened mouse at any situation; it was cute. "Where would you like to go out to?" he continued on quietly.

Dib looked away as he thought the question over. Not pulling away from the small touches at all. "I'm not sure. I've only eaten at a few places. No where really nice, though." He stayed silent for a few minutes after he spoke; only giving small noises here and there as he continued to think. Finally, he turned his eyes back to Dwicky a small grin on his lips. "Somewhere that has Chinese. I really want to eat some of that again and since I'm out for at least a bit, I can finally have a chance to do so."

Dwicky grinned back a little. "Chinese it is then." He drew his fingers back down to Dib's chin. His gaze flickered back around at the other cars and their passengers nearby. No one seemed to pay any mind to the man in the car with the young teenager in the straitjacket now, Dwicky doubted they would pay any mind later; at least not for a few quick seconds. Looking back to Dib, he leaned in near. He paused for a hesitant moment so near the boy's lips, but finally gave in and pressed a fleeting kiss there.

The small quick kiss had Dib giving a pleased sound at getting what he finally wanted. When Dwicky broke it, he quickly lifted one of his hands from his lap just so he could grab the one that was still touching his own face. He let his attention fall down as he clasped their fingers together. His voice was a bit shy as he spoke. "Thank you for doing this. It's nice to be out again. I have to admit it's still kind of scary, but I'm too excited to really care about that feeling at the moment." He lifted his eyes a bit to give the other a bit of a smile. "I'm really glad I get to stay with you."

Dwicky brought their linked hands closer to himself, pressing them to his cheek. "Me too." He gave Dib's hand an affectionate nuzzle of cheek before he turned his head to kiss one, two, three of the boy's knuckles. "I'm glad I could take you home with me." He blinked; wait, that didn't sound quite right. Clearing his throat, which didn't exactly clear the warmth near his ears, he went on "I'll take care of you." He raised his free hand to run along the back of Dib's hand, his thumb softly petting the boy's wrist. "We'll get through all of this together. You'll see. You'll see less and less of that place, until one day you won't see it at all. You'll forget all about that room, those padded walls, and even that jacket." He pressed a kiss to the last knuckle he had missed.

Dib didn't really seem to mind Dwicky's slip up, too happy to have each bit of small contact against his skin and hear such words said to him. "So, that means this isn't the only time I'll get to go out? Will there be other times?" His free hand clenched a bit in his lap, nervous as to what the answer would be. "If I'm good and everything continues to go so well, does that mean you'll keep bringing me outside? Just so I don't have to stay in there all alone."

Dwicky nodded easily. He leaned in again to speak when the shrill honk of a car behind him caused him to scream and latch onto Dib; it was becoming habit forming.

"MOVE IT!" someone from behind shouted.

Dwicky glanced back; a huge line up of cars stock piled as far as the eye could see. Dwicky glanced in front of them; traffic had started moving a good ways again. The man blinked several times. "Oh. Oops."

Dib didn't seem to mind the sudden grip Dwicky had on him. In fact, when the horn sounded, Dib's one hand shot out to grab the man's shirt in a death grip, as if something were about to take him and pull him out of the car at any moment. The sudden shout after only caused him to squeeze Dwicky's hand tighter while he tried to bury his face in the man's shirt. Just barely eased that he could hide away against the other body.

Dwicky glanced down, running a hand atop the boy's head. "I got distracted." He gave a nervous chuckle. He nudged Dib. "C'mon, I need to drive." He placed a small kiss atop the boy's head as he let go of Dib, trying to pry the boy's tight grip on him as gently as he could. "It'll be alright. Just a little road rage." He settled one hand on the steering wheel as he continued on forward, barely relieving any anger from the cars behind. Dwicky's free hand sought out Dib's to hold, stroking knuckles with a thumb. "So, what should we do first when we get to my place?" Dwicky spoke on, pushing the conversation on to distract him from what just happened.

Dib sat back in his seat, although a bit hesitant. He was still a bit tense, but it was Dwicky's hand on his own which had him calming somewhat and trying to forget his sudden fear. "I'm not sure. Strange that I should say that, I guess, since I've been in that place so long. I should have so many things that I want to do." He gave a small shrug. "I just never thought it would happen though. So it's a bit unexpected." He looked at the other out the corner of his eyes. "We won't have to be as careful anymore when we get to your place, will we?"

Dwicky pressed his lips together in an unsure line. "Not so much in the apartment. No. Or.. when there's no one around." He stared out the windshield, the wipers sliding into his straight forward view every once in a while. "Outside, in public, we still should probably be careful. We don't know whose who in a crowd." Nervously, he drummed a few fingers on the steering. It was a sad and guilty predicament, and it only made Dwicky feel bad, not for himself, but for Dib. But he squeezed Dib's hand. "But, at my place, we don't have to worry. It'll be just you and me."

It was a few seconds before Dib actually nodded his head, accepting the answer he was given. It took him awhile to speak up again. "That makes sense. It kind of makes me wish I could just stay at your place all the time, but I guess that would be kind of hard to do." He finally lifted his eyes just so he could look back at Dwicky. "It's nice that I get to be out, but I think spending time with you is much better. That way I don't have to worry about anyone taking you away from me."

Dwicky tilted his head to the side, listening. He wasn't sure he understood the last thing said; estranged Dib logic. "No one will take me away, Dib." He glanced at the boy with a slight perk of lips. "I told you I'm not going anywhere." He gave a small chuckle as he looked back to the road. "Who would take me away if you were out without me anyway?" He pet the other's thumb every once in a while.

Dib shook his head before letting his eyes fall down to their hands. "No one can take you away while I'm with you and I like it that way. I like the fact that I can be with you and no one will suddenly come and take you from me." A small frown formed on his face. "I like when you visit me, yeah, but I hate it at the same time because they always make you leave. It's like that one night all over again. I always have to watch you disappear." His fingers tightened a bit.

Dwicky took a long glance at Dib, looking back he didn't speak right away. The sound of the heavy rainfall filled the silence. A splash of a puddle could be heard as tires ran through it. "As sad as it is to say, nothing lasts forever, Dib." he started slowly "But," he glanced back to Dib, "just remember, even if I have to go, even if I have to leave for a very long time, I'll always come back for you. I'll always be thinking of you too. So, think good, happy thoughts while I'm gone, so I'll always have a happy Dib to come back to." His hand gripped tighter onto Dib's. "Okay?"

Dib finally raised his eyes once more, blinking them a few times before finally a small smile came to his face, replacing the frown that had been there. "Alright, I promise." He turned his attention back out the window in front of him. His mood lifted a bit. He kept his eyes on the wet road and each car that was in front of them, not really minding the silence all that much for the moment. The small, occasional building would have him turning his head just to catch a quick glance at it, but just as quickly, he would turn his eyes back; his interest growing once more with each thing he would see.


	11. Sessions 11

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

**By Kitteh and NeoFox**

**Rating** PG 13

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.

**Beta** Lint

Chapter 11

The sight of the apartments wasn't all that much to look at; a middle class building with middle class people. But in the pouring rain, which was only becoming worse, it looked cozy and mighty inviting.

After Dwicky had them parked, he had the joy of juggling the bag and Dib all over again, carrying either to the door where once again he fiddled with keys to unlock and open the door. He set Dib down on the worn, ruddy carpet with a sound of accomplishment. Adjusting the bag better on his shoulder, he gave an easy gesture of the foyer. "Welcome to Home Sweet Home Apartments. Affordable happy living. This way please." He walked towards the elevator, pushing a button to call it down.

Dib gave a small glance around once he was set on his feet, following closely behind while at the same time, looking at everything he could see. There was nothing too amazing about what he saw. The walls in the small area looked like they had been repainted dozens of times; dents in the walls here and there as if someone had a nasty fight with certain areas. The lights kept flickering off and on a few times and Dib blinked his eyes in irritation. He dropped his eyes down to the carpet once he was next to Dwicky, hoping that would help at least a bit. Though he couldn't help but raise them every few seconds to look at the elevator.

With a celebratory ding, the elevator doors opened and Dwicky ushered Dib inside. He pushed for the fourth floor and soon the doors closed, taking them up. The elevator looked as used as the main entrance. The walls were scratched up and written on, a few punk initials in hearts a few 'so and so was here' but for the most part, it looked clean and didn't smell like a bathroom. It was a little while before the elevator dinged again, opening its doors to a new hallway lined with doors. Apartments didn't look all that much different than asylums, just the chit chat heard in the rooms was a little saner, television sets could be heard, and it smelled like leftovers.

Dwicky stepped out of the elevator, turning to offer his hand to Dib. "Coming? We're almost there."

Dib had been so busy reading what was written on the walls in the elevator that Dwicky's voice startled him. He tore his gaze away from one of the few rude phrases so he could look at the other. He gave a small nod before raising a hand to grip Dwicky's own. He easily stepped out of the elevator only to press close to the other, his eyes darting all around the small hallway. It was too easy to tell that he was on edge once again, though he tried to hide it as best he could by looking up at the man and speaking in a small voice. "Where's your place?"

Dwicky pointed. "Just down the hall." He gave a soft chuckle at Dib's sudden demure attitude, squeezing the boy's hand in assurance. "Don't worry." He led the boy down the hall, letting him clingingly trail behind him. It wasn't too far down before he stopped at a door marked '312'. With a quick twist of key he unlocked and opened the door, letting the both of them in. Dwicky flicked on a light and closed the door, locking it behind them. "Welcome to my home. Go ahead and make yourself at home."

It was a quaint apartment, well lived in. It had all the basic needs for bachelor living: kitchen to the left, living room further on, bedroom straight ahead, and bathroom to the right.

Dwicky headed for the living room, wanting to put the bag down and see what exactly was in it. "Can I get you anything? I bought at least one of everything I could find." He gave a small laugh. "The bathroom is there if you needta, ya'know… or take a shower."

Dib walked inside the apartment step by step, his eyes wide as he looked at everything. He followed behind Dwicky into the living room just so he could walk around and poke at every small thing he saw. He only gave a small noise at what the other had said, not really paying much attention. It wasn't until a few moments later, and after almost tipping over a lamp, that he finally turned around to face Dwicky with an unsure expression. "I can't take a shower. I have nothing to wear." He let his eyes fall to the jacket that still somewhat held him. "Except for this stuff..."

Dwicky plunked down on the couch, looking through the contents of the duffle bag. "Hm." He pulled out a rather small looking blue shirt with an indifferent smiley face on it. "Well..." He placed the shirt aside and pulled out several more shirts and even a few pants that were several sizes too small. He also had the misfortune of pulling out a pair of underwear that was too small too. With a slight yelp, he tossed it into the pile he set aside. Clearing his throat, Dwicky quickly stood. "I guess you can borrow some clothes from me."

Dib blinked his eyes at the suggestion, letting his gaze fall back on Dwicky. It took him a few seconds to finally answer as he walked towards the man, stopping only when he was beside him. "That's fine. I don't really mind." He tilted his head a bit as his expression grew a bit curious. "Won't they be a bit big? I'm not complaining though, because it will be nice to get out of this jacket." He looked back down at his feet. "It will probably feel weird too. It still feels weird being able to use my hands again."

Dwicky snatched up one of those hands and tugged Dib along with a grin. "It'll feel good to get out of that jacket, and put something nice, big, and comfy on." He led Dib into his bedroom, flicking the lights on as he entered. The room was simple; a window, some old furniture with memorabilia on it, and a double bed. Dwicky threw open the closet doors, revealing his rather simplistic wardrobe, and a lot of clutter. "Ta-da! Hm. Let's see. Anything you really wanted to wear?" He turned to face Dib. "Hm. Maybe we should just concentrate on getting that jacket off first." He suggested with a little too much eagerness.

A small blush crept its way onto Dib's cheeks. "A-Alright..." Despite the small word, he dropped his gaze down to the floor, every nervous feeling slowly coming back. His hands twisted around each other in front of himself and he didn't make any move to try and get the heavy piece of clothing off. "You really sure it's okay for me to take it off?"

Dwicky clapped his hands together and rubbed them eagerly. "Yep. I've full permission to take your clothes off." He grinned despite the warmth that crossed his cheeks. He wiggled his fingers and stepped around Dib. "Now, let's get these things undone. And let's take this bad boy off." He began unfastening one buckle after another, loosening the jacket. Dwicky hummed to himself, shaking his head "I'm getting far too good at this."

Dib's fidgeting became worse and worse with each buckle, until finally the jacket was completely loosened. As soon as he was able to, he wiggled out of the heavy fabric, pulling his arms out one at a time and letting the jacket fall away. His skin was terribly pale from lack of sun; more so than it was years ago. It was also much too obvious that he hadn't been eating very well, considering how skinny he was. Though he quickly covered himself up by crossing his arms over his chest, it really didn't do much good and his eyes looked anywhere but at Dwicky.

Arms slipped around Dib's thin body and hugged him warmly to a chest from behind. "Mm. Don't shiver." Dwicky nuzzled his nose and lips against the side of Dib's neck, pressing a few soft kisses to an even paler shoulder. He rubbed Dib's arms, happier that he could stroke the skin with lingering fingertips without the barrage of the jacket's sleeve. The boy looked just that much smaller without the straitjacket, and so incredibly frail, like porcelain and just as pale. "Is that better?" Dwicky held the boy that much tighter.

Dib's body tensed up at first as he was held, but just as quickly, he relaxed and pressed back against Dwicky. He turned his head a bit so that he could look at the other, but the best he could do was glimpse at the man out the corner of his eyes. A small smile came to his face and he couldn't help but nod his head a bit. "Much better..." He stayed in Dwicky's arms for a bit longer until he finally turned around. His arms snaked out to wrap around the man's neck, keeping him down just so he could lean up and press a kiss on the other's lips.

Dwicky made a soft noise against Dib's lips; happy to oblige, happy to kiss the boy in the comfort and privacy of his own home, without worry. He smiled against Dib's lips, parting to speak. "I must agree." Fingers cascaded down the boy's back, running down the protruding bumps of spine. Dwicky ran his fingers against the boy's lower back and along his sides, enjoying the tactile pleasure of skin unhindered by the course jacket. "Mmm. Soft, cuddly Dib." Dwicky snuggled his face to the crook of the boy's neck, but not without softly attacking it with his mouth.

Dib gave a low noise at what was done to his neck. He leaned his head away just a bit to let Dwicky do whatever he pleased. His eyes slid halfway shut and he couldn't help but move his hands up to run fingers through the man's hair much like before. The hands that ran down his sides only caused each small sound he made to become louder, but this time he didn't even try to quiet himself. He just gave in to each touch and gave back, giving a small nip to Dwicky's ear before licking the whole rim. Never once silencing as he did so.

Dwicky made a sound deep in his throat. He drew his hand up Dib's ribs, noting just how much they stuck out. He made a small, disapproving sound as he raised his head to kiss Dib's cheek before raising it completely to look down at the boy with a worried expression. "They really aren't feeding you well there." He ran a hand up and down Dib's arm; it was thin enough to practically wrap his entire hand around it. It had Dwicky frowning with more concern as he kissed the corner of Dib's lips. "We really should get you dressed so we can go out and put something in you, before you float away." He rubbed a hand up and down the arch of Dib's back.

Dib gave a weak protest as Dwicky pulled away, though he didn't speak much against the man's words. What the other said was true. He wasn't in the best shape. The hands that had been in Dwicky's hair fell back around his neck just so he could mess with the collar of his shirt. Though the thought of real food was tempting, it was hard for him to want to let go of what they were doing at the moment. "Can't we go out a little later? Please? If we go out, I have to wait even longer to do these things with you. We just got here. I want to be alone with you a little longer." Just to make his argument final, Dib pulled Dwicky back down once more so that their lips were barely touching. His eyes stared into the man's own. "Please..."

With a weak noise, Dwicky felt his resistance start to crumble, what little resistance he had to begin with. Who was he to argue with a lithe, shirtless boy clinging and pressed up against him giving him _that_ look. There were several good reasons why he shouldn't give in... and... Dwicky had yet to think of them! But! Assuredly, they were there! ...(somewhere).

"Alright. We don't have to go out just yet. But... you need clothes. And, a shower. Yea. --Remember that?" Dwicky tried to stand back up a little, but the boy had a pretty good grip around his neck; he was doomed. "We shouldn't waste your day just- sitting around." He laughed a little nervously, trying to keep his hands still, without success, on Dib's hips. "Right?"

Dib only shook his head in response before pulling Dwicky closer. Instead of pressing his lips to the other's like before, his tongue darted out to instead lick at the man's lips in a quick teasing way, trailing down past goatee and chin until it stopped at the man's throat. Dib gave a few, small licks before he latched his mouth onto the skin and sucked. He broke the contact after only a few seconds just so he could speak against wet skin. "I'm not sitting around..."

Dwicky's eyes snapped wide open only to fall almost completely closed. He made a weak noise as his arms, equally as weak, wrapped around the small of the boy's back. "I know you aren't." Dwicky spoke in almost an inaudible whimper, but he was sure Dib felt it against his throat. It was hard to keep his voice strong. "But... um…. clothes. Yea. And, um. Food. And... other necessary stuff for survival." Dwicky drew his arms back to rub at the boy's side in weak motions. "You want to do that, right?"

Dib pulled his lips back at Dwicky's words, giving a small pout. It didn't take long for him to crumble and give in, and he nodded his head a bit in agreement. "I guess so. A shower would be nice. So would actual clothes." He bit at his lip for a few seconds before a smile came to his face. "I haven't been out to eat in such a long time. It'll be nice to actually do such a thing again while eating real food." The smile slowly fell as he glanced to the side, away from Dwicky's face. "I'm kind of nervous though, being around so many people. I know we talked about it and you tried to help me, but I'm still scared."

"It's alright to be scared." Dwicky weakly smiled. "But we'll take it slow; go somewhere that isn't too big and crowded." He smiled a little more, rubbing a hand flush against the bare skin of Dib's back again; he liked the jacket gone, he really did. "We can act a little more freely in a small place." A hand returned Dib's gaze back up to Dwicky with a few fingers on the boy's jaw. "You said something before about how they don't do your hair right. Well, we can stop by some place and get it done how you like." Dwicky ran a few fingers through the poorly cut, overgrown hair, brushing it back. "Then maybe stop by somewhere and buy some clothes of your own." He exhaled contently as he leaned down closer. "We'll fix you up and make you feel like a person again."

Those last few words had Dib's eyes widen a bit before a wide smile spread on his face. He couldn't help but press his lips once more against Dwicky's own for a few seconds just so he could pull away and bury his face in the man's neck. His arms kept themselves tight around the other, refusing to let go. "I'd like that so much." The words were muttered against skin and if actions weren't enough, then it was easy to tell how happy he was by his voice.

Dwicky hugged the boy tightly against him, making a happy noise of his own as he held him for moment longer. He kissed Dib's shoulder a few times before exhaling comfortably. "Then it's a date." Dwicky planted a kiss as near onto Dib's cheek as he could get before suddenly whisking the boy off his feet to carry him off to the bathroom. "You're so light! We're going to have to order a lot of Chinese to remedy that."

Dib let out a startled noise at suddenly being carried for the third time that day, but other than that made no protest against it and quickly quieted. He easily buried his face against Dwicky's neck and gave a small 'Mm-hmm' to show that he had heard the other, though he did kick his feet a bit. It was a small, little thing he seemed to do each time Dwicky carried him.

In the bathroom, Dib was finally settled on the floor. Dwicky tried to coax Dib to stop clinging with a few playful kisses, running his hands up the boy's arms to pull them off. "So, what'll be? Bath or shower?" He strained from his spot to tug some fresh towels over onto the nearby counter. He draped one like a hooded cloak over Dib's head with a chuckle.

Dib raised his hands to move the towel a bit. He stuck his tongue out at Dwicky for a few seconds before he couldn't stop the small laugh that came from him. "I think I'd rather take a shower." He finally spoke up before turning to look at the tub that was behind him. "I never really liked baths. They take too long and I don't like just sitting there." He gave a small shrug before turning his eyes back to Dwicky, his hands fidgeted with the towel here and there.

"A shower it is then." Dwicky turned to fiddle with the knobs. "I know it's been a while since you've had a chance to manually run a shower. It's easy, like riding a bike...-that's really a shower. And- the handles adjust the temperature. Yea. The right one is cold, the left one is hot. They have little coloured bands on them anyway, because people are morons. Just put your hand under the faucet like so until it's what you like. Then pull this little stopper here and ta-da!" The water poured from the showerhead above. Dwicky stood back up. "Just adjust the knobs here if you want it hot or colder. I'll go out, give you some privacy. Figure out what clothes to lend you. Just leave the door open so I know you're okay." He gave the boy a quick peck on the lips before he moved to leave.

Dib only gave a small nod in response to each word Dwicky said and gave a tiny smile after the kiss. He waited until the other was completely out of the room to turn his attention towards the shower, walking up to it and sticking his hand under it. He immediately pulled his hand back when it almost burned him and did as he was just told. He reached a hand out to turn the knob, sticking his hand back under the water right after. Happy with it, he looked over his shoulder before cautiously stripping out of the rest of his clothes and climbed into the shower, closing the curtain behind him.

"Oh!" Dwicky's voice called back from the bedroom "The soap and shampoo are in there too! On the lil ledgey thing." Dwicky tossed shirts left and right, sifting through what was hung up. There wasn't a horribly large array to choose from, just junk and clothes that he'd never bothered to throw away. "And if you need anything- ask!"

The sudden shout had Dib jump a bit, startled and he knocked over said shampoo. He was able to quickly catch it just in time with shaky hands before it hit the floor, keeping hold of it for a few minutes before his voice actually came out. "A-Alright!" He let out a harsh breath before trying to shake away what water had gotten in his eyes with no success. Instead of putting the bottle back, he opened it up, though it took a few tries, and caused him to give a few frustrated noises. Though he was more than happy when it gave way and he was able to use what was inside.

Dwicky lay on the bed, the decided clothes for Dib neatly lying next to him. He tapped a foot as he hummed to himself with his arms behind his head, waiting patiently. He listened to the sound of the shower which barely droned out the sound of the rain outside the window. His eyes stared at the ceiling but he wasn't looking at all. A wide, self satisfied grin spread cattily on his face "... There's a naked Dib in my shower."

It took a while for the water from the shower to finally stop. Even though the shower seemed to be over, it took an even longer time for Dib to actually come out of the bathroom. There was obvious shuffling in the other room and small, annoyed noises here and there until finally footsteps were barely heard on the carpet that stopped in the doorway to the bedroom. There Dib stood, staring at Dwicky with only a limp towel around his waist that he tried to keep up with one hand. His one long lock of hair hung wet and limp over his eyes, which seemed to be the cause of his annoyance as the rest of his hair stayed matted down to his head. Though he tried to dry off, some small drops of water still rolled down his arms and chest, but he paid them no mind. "I'm done..."

Dwicky sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed in one smooth motion. He tried to stifle a chuckle at the poor boy's drowned appearance. "Have a good shower?" He rose to walk past Dib to retrieve another towel and a brush. When he came back, he led Dib into the room to sit on the bed. It really was hard to resist the urge to whip off that towel and lick every warm drop off the boy's hot skin. Dwicky knocked himself in the head with the brush, forcing the thoughts out. He gave a weak grin. "You must feel a lot more refreshed."

Dib gave a small noise when he was guided to the bed, not needing much coaxing to sit down. Though it was easy to tell he was still a bit annoyed and he answered the other in a calm voice. "I feel a lot better. It's nice to be able to actually get cleaned up on my own." He gave a small look at the brush, tensing up a bit before pulling back from Dwicky as if the object was some sort of horrible weapon. "What are you going to do?"

Dwicky looked at the brush in question. "Oh? This?" He waved it slightly. "Brain surgery of course." He shook his head and laughed, which probably didn't help Dib any. "I'm going to fix that mess of hair." He put the brush down and took up the towel, plopped it on Dib's head and ruffled it around, drying the boy's hair. Dwicky pulled the towel back, revealing a poof of damp Dib hair and a none too pleased Dib. Dwicky picked up the brush again and pointed it Dib's way. "Or did you want to use the object of destruction on your hair instead?"

Dib quickly shook his head. "No, it's fine!" The words were almost squeaked out. As much as he wanted to lift his hands to try and tame his hair on his own, he kept them on his lap instead. His eyes dropped to watch as his fingers played with each tiny thread in the towel. It was obvious he was still tense though. Dwicky's earlier words didn't really helping his worries.

Dwicky grinned a little "Don't worry, I'll be gentle." He took the brush and carefully brushed out the knots first. "Wow. Three years of poor hair care. They really must be pretty brutal if you're so nervous around a brush. Wow, your hair gets knotted easy." Dwicky ran the brush through the side he had managed to get the knots out of, then he began on the other side, trying his best not to pull on the hair, given how tense the boy was already.

Dib flinched every now and then when a rather big knot was pulled. It didn't take too long for him to slowly ease up with each careful stroke of the brush, despite the hurtful ones. "I never really noticed. Well, other than the fact my long hair annoyed me." His head leaned into the brush along with one single stroke. "I don't really like anything they do there. I like this though. Everything you've done for me so far. It's really nice."

Dwicky smiled some in response. He managed to get all of the knots out and started brush Dib's hair back. He righted the boy's head so he could brush it better, and with one stroke the one lock of hair sprung up as it usually did. "You tell the people at the hair-cutting place exactly what you want, okay? That way you won't have to bite anyone into submission."

Dib's eyes shut halfway as he let out a small noise at the attention he was receiving. At Dwicky's words all he could do was nod his head lightly in response, not really wanting to form any kind of words at the moment. He was too content to just sit there and let the man brush his hair.

Dwicky continued to do just that, running the brush slower as it ran through the boy's dark hair. Eventually, he stopped, clasping the brush with both hands as he looked down with amusement at the subdued boy. "You should get dressed, before you catch a cold."

Dib blinked his eyes a few times before they completely opened again. He looked around the room before his eyes settled on the clothes that had been laid out for him on the bed. He kept his gaze on them for a few seconds before reaching over to pick up one of the few articles of clothing, holding it in his hands on his lap before turning his eyes back on Dwicky. "Are you gonna stay in here?" Though it seemed as if the words were innocent, it was obvious they were teasing as well by the small smirk that Dib couldn't keep off his lips.

Dwicky blinked a few times, but it was Dib's smirk that had him look away with a nervous laugh. "No-no. I'll go. I'll go." He turned around quickly to vacate the bedroom to give Dib privacy. "Leaving!"

Dib waited until Dwicky left to finally stand up and remove the towel. The one piece of clothing he had picked up easily slipped over his head. Even though it was a shirt, it could have passed off as long sleeved on his small frame, the bottom half almost hit his knees. He ignored it though, only to pick up the pants, having a bit more trouble slipping them on, but he finally got them on after a few moments. They were too long, much too long, so he tried his best to roll them up by hopping on each foot, doing each leg bit by bit. After a bit, he was finally able to roll them up as best he could and made his way out of the bedroom and towards where he saw Dwicky's head.

The man sat up from the couch in the living room when Dib walked in. "Done? Oh!" Dwicky's hand rose to his mouth, but it didn't help the chuckles at all. "Wow. Yea, those are much too big. Your clothes are too small and mine are too big, there's no winning. But this'll do for now until we get you something new. Besides, it's not that bad, is it?" He motioned for Dib to sit by him.

Dib shot a small, annoyed glance at Dwicky for the laughter, but it slowly died away as it was soon even on his face. "No, it's okay..." He crossed his arms over his chest, hugging the shirt closer to his body while his hands toyed with the sleeves, as if his words weren't proof enough. With small steps, he made his way over to the couch and sat down next to where Dwicky, the cushions sinking just a bit as he did so.

A hand rested atop Dib's head, fooling with the soft, clean hair. "How do you feel?" Dwicky quietly asked.

Dib stayed silent for a few moments after the question was asked, letting his hands fall down to his lap to fool around with the shirt. "I feel..." He paused for a second, chewing at his lip before the rest of the words finally fell from his lips. "...calm. I feel calm and happy for once. Being out of that jacket and being able to just walk around and do normal things, it's really nice. I missed it..." He leaned over so that he could rest against Dwicky. His head propped against the other's side. "And I'm happy I can just be with you."

An arm loosely rested around Dib's waist. "Me too." Dwicky quietly agreed. He tugged Dib just a little closer. _"And_ you smell nicer." he added playfully with chuckle.

A small, quiet laugh escaped Dib and he easily pressed closer to Dwicky when pulled nearer. The hand that had tugged at the shirt moved up so he could grab hold of the man's, gripping them both together under his chin. He stayed silent for a few moments, his laughter slowly dying away and the smile faded from his face. After awhile he finally spoke up again, though a bit quieter, his eyes down the entire time. "If I asked you something you'd answer truthfully, right?"

Dwicky glanced down, startled a little by the sudden solemness. He nodded, affirming his words, though Dib couldn't see. "Of course." He leaned forward a bit to catch a look at Dib's lowered face. "You can always talk to me. About anything."

Dib glanced to the side at Dwicky, but looked away again just as quickly. It took longer for him to finally ask his question, his voice still just as low, but with a sudden nervous tone under it. "Have you ever thought I was crazy?" He tucked their hands a bit more under his chin, afraid the contact would suddenly be gone. "When you first saw me at Skool, in the woods, and even when you saw me again. When you came back." His eyes closed. "Did you ever once think like them?"

Dwicky was slightly taken aback. His brows furrowed as he opened his mouth, but instead he closed it as something else stuck out from Dib's question. His back straightened a little. "_Them_?"

"Everyone..." Dib opened his eyes at that one word, his body completely tense. "The kids at Skool. The people I tried to convince. My dad." He let their hands drop down to his lap. "Even the people at the asylum, you saw, they call me crazy all the time." It seemed like that would be all he was going to say, considering the silence that followed, but after a few moments he spoke up once more, just as afraid as before. "Even the voices, when I heard them. They called me crazy a lot. So much..."

Dwicky didn't speak right away, more out of pity and worry than actual shock this time. "The first time I saw you..." he echoed softly. His gaze went skyward in automation, in thought and memory. "Honestly? It feels like a very long time ago." Dwicky shut his eyes, leaning his head back more. "But... it really hasn't been that long, or has it? You were a lot smaller, so excited all the time, so eager..-you would do anything for someone to believe you." Slowly, he opened his eyes, but it wasn't the cold night and trees that he saw, but the dirty off white colour of his walls and ceiling. "But you were just a kid crying out for attention in the worst of ways, and getting even worse attention in the end. Aliens, space ships, life on other planets... -I..." Dwicky lowered his head and looked down to the empty palm of his free hand. "No, I never thought you were crazy. High strung and mixed up, yes. Crazy, no." he shook his head slowly.

Dib's hand tightened around Dwicky's own, the only real movement he had made after what the other said. After a few moments, he turned his body around so that he was facing the man while still holding tight to his hand. When he was settled enough, he leaned in so that they were face to face, and touched their foreheads together, his own eyes staring directly into Dwicky's. "It feels good to finally be told that. Especially by someone I care about." With those words, he leaned in to press a soft kiss against the other's lips.

Dwicky's throat danced; he didn't have much time to speak before anything he had to say was cut off, and changed to something much weaker because of the kiss. Even when the kiss broke, Dwicky pressed it again, leaning Dib back against the back of the couch, moving closer against the boy. He squeezed Dib's hand, lifting it to rest on top of the back of the couch, slipping his fingers between the other's only to grip tighter. He broke the kiss to touch their foreheads together again. "Besides, you're not crazy, ...you're schizophrenic."

Dib's gaze was lazy as it fell on Dwicky once the kiss was broken. For a few seconds he just laid there, allowing the other to keep him pinned, but it was Dwicky's words which had him perking up, a curious expression coming over his face. "Schizophrenic?" The word was carefully pronounced, and even though he had heard it said a few times in the last couple of years, Dib still couldn't help but question it.

Dwicky had taken it in himself to crawl up and invade Dib's lap, straddling it. Though Dib's questioning word had him pausing, his free hand stayed guiltily poised on the bottom hem of the boy's shirt. "Yea. You know what that means, right?" He sat back a little, blinking questioningly down at Dib. "Your doctors explained everything to you..." his lips pressed into a thin line "Right?"

Dib let out a small noise before averting his eyes. An unsure look came over his face and he shook his head. "Not really, I mean, they tried to here and there. Once or twice. Never really enough for me to understand everything. I didn't really listen most of the time, and they didn't really care." He turned his attention back to Dwicky, his head tilting to the side as he gazed up at the man. "So, I'm not crazy, but I'm still not really all that sane?" His face fell a bit with the last few words he had asked.

"No, no, that's not it at all." Dwicky gave a soft sigh. He snatched Dib's other free hand, linking fingers with it as well as he brought both up above the boy's head, keeping him well pinned. "You're sane; you know right from wrong." He dipped his head down, kissing the inner part of his upper arm, nosing the long sleeve to get at the pale skin. "You... just suffer from a mental illness most likely caused from stress that causes you to hear things, and have bad dreams. But you aren't crazy." Dwicky blinked. "Hm. I'm not helping my argument, am I?" Not waiting for an answer, Dwicky lowered his head to attack the crook of the boy's neck with his mouth. The shirt was oversized enough so that he could tug the collar with his teeth to almost pull it off one shoulder, which he wasted no time in attacking as well. "The point is, you're well on your way to becoming better. That's all that counts." his words were warmly murmured against damp skin.

It was hard for Dib to actually pay attention to the conversation, considering every little thing Dwicky did to him. Instead of any sort of answer, all he did was give out a low moan. His body shifted a bit under the other's for a few moments and not being able to move caused him to whine a bit. After a while, he gave in just to turn his head to the side to take Dwicky's ear between his teeth, licking at the rim before nipping at it.

Dwicky murmured something, but it was hard to tell with the man's mouth too busy sucking the pale skin on Dib's shoulder. It was the boy's clavicle that he ran his tongue over next, enjoying the loose collar of his own shirt rather than the restrictive jacket on Dib. He tugged their linked hands up higher, causing the boy to arch. He pressed closer, the throaty sound was barely muffled as he completely missed Dib's lips with his own.

Dib easily let go of Dwicky's ear as he was pinned back further. The small noises from the other's actions were no longer muffled. Each small moan became louder and only died away when Dwicky pressed a kiss near his lips. Feeling no real contact on his lips, Dib darted his tongue out to lick the side of Dwicky's face while trying to press as close as he could to the man. He struggled just a bit against the hold the other had on his hands, and tiny whimpers came from him every now and then.

The conversation was long forgotten, in favor of the needy sounds here and there. Dwicky finally relented and untwined their hands, but instead he cuffed both of Dib's with one of his own, leaving one free. He turned his head to catch Dib's tongue with his, running his own against it though refusing to kiss the boy just yet. His free hand slipped between them to run up and down Dib's front, running fingers over bony ribs and up along the boy's chest, feeling for the sensitive nubs underneath. When found, Dwicky ran his thumb around the sensitive area until it rose.

Dib had been so busy running his tongue along Dwicky's that when he felt the touch, he let out a choked noise that easily turned into a moan. His eyes, which had snapped wide open easily closed, all the way, as he gave into the touch. His back arched up off the couch as he pressed more into Dwicky's hand. His tongue, which had been licking at the man's, instead moved out to push past it and past lips to invade the other's mouth, a loud, but muffled moan followed the action.

Dwicky nearly bit Dib's tongue as Dib kissed him so fiercely. A surprised sound in his throat died to something much more pleased as he thoroughly welcomed the other slick tongue in his mouth. He tightened his grip on the boy's wrists, keeping him restrained and writhing below him. Still, with his other hand, he gently pinched the sensitive nub over the shirt, ever so lightly rolling it between fingertips.

The kiss was rough and almost sloppy, considering how much Dib was squirming and whimpering against it. He didn't seem to mind or really care at all and pulled back away from the kiss just as quickly, so he could breathe. Tiny moans escaped his mouth even then. It didn't take long for him to latch his mouth back onto Dwicky's own, teeth biting at bottom lip and sucking eagerly as he gazed up at the man with dazed eyes.

A low moan left Dwicky muffled hard against Dib's lips. He felt a pang of pain from the boy's teeth, whimpering but not faltering as he pressed his tongue against Dib's, pushing deeper in the boy's mouth. Somehow, Dwicky managed to part from Dib's mouth, swallowing a taste that wasn't just his own. He tried to catch his heavy breath, licking lips and tasting blood along with saliva. He ran his hand again on Dib's chest, trying to sooth the quick beat under his palm.

Dib gave a low moan as Dwicky parted their lips. He kept his eyes on the man's own, though they were half open the entire time. The hand that still moved along his chest caused him to give out a small, shaky moan that he didn't even try to keep in. He no longer tried to struggle against the hold Dwicky had on him, and instead kept perfectly still, only giving one small harsh breath.

Dwicky brushed his clumsy fingers against Dib's cheek, brushing back the dark hair from the boy's face. He broke their gaze as he looked to Dib's hands, which he held much too tightly. Slowly, he relented, his clasp loosened to something gentler as he brought the boy's hands back down. There he softly kissed the poor red skin and each finger, each knuckle in silent apology for keeping his hands bound, especially so firmly.

Fingers twitched under the small kisses, but other than that, Dib made no other move for the moment. He kept his eyes on Dwicky's face, only giving a small, quiet sound in response to finally being free. After a few moments, he pulled the hand that wasn't being held away, only to wrap it around the back of Dwicky's neck so he could pull the man back down. He pressed a quick, soft kiss on the corner of the other's abused lips and pulled back just as quickly, but still kept him down. "Love you..."

Dwicky smiled soft and weak, though it hurt his split lip to do so. He leaned further down to nuzzle his cheek against Dib's, stroking the other with a hand. He cleared his throat, though it didn't completely clear the husky tone to his voice "I love you too."

Dib let out a small noise at hearing the words come from Dwicky once again. It was something he just couldn't get enough of. Having the other so near to him, he easily cuddled closer. His hand moved up from Dwicky's neck to run through the man's hair instead. "You were right. I really am liking today." It was hard for him to hide the grin that came to his lips at the next words he said. "Maybe even more than yesterday."

Dwicky's already warm cheeks grew hotter and he let out a shameless, completely breathless laugh. "You're the same boy I visited a week ago, right?" With a groan he moved off Dib's lap, slipping arms around the boy's middle so he could flop over to lay with Dib, cuddled and firmly sandwiched between him and the back of the couch. "I'm surprised really, with _especially_ just now, that you were still single." That had a slight giddy chuckle from Dwicky. Then again, he was surprised either of them could still talk.

Dib smiled shyly at Dwicky's words and he couldn't help but bury his face against the man's shirt for a few moments. His hand fell away from the other's head once he was moved around and instead, gripped tightly around the man's waist. After awhile he finally pulled his face away so that he could speak, his voice much quieter than before. "Am I really that different from when you first came back? Have I really changed that much?"

The man had shut his eyes, much too comfortable to be bothered with the world outside what he held against him. "Mhm." he answered lazily. "Mmm. Yea. Definitely. Very much. For the better, I might add." He cracked open an eye to look down at Dib. "I don't recall such affections like just now. But...yeaaa." he drew out the sound. "Quick learner." he chuckled giddily again. "Apply the same dedication to skool, you'll do _quite_ well." He buried his nose and mouth into Dib's hair, stifling another horribly teasing chuckle.

A small blush that he didn't try to hide came over Dib's cheeks. His hold on Dwicky tightened just a bit and if anything, he cuddled closer to the man before letting out a content noise. "I never liked anyone that came to check on me in my room. It was always the same doctors or the same nurses. They would always say the same things to me. That I needed to stop doing one thing, or be more calm about another. I never listened to them." His eyes closed as he kept speaking. "It was different when you came to see me, though. I was scared, but you were someone new to talk to. You actually seemed like you cared. That's all I ever wanted."

Dwicky exhaled a warm breath against Dib's scalp. He lifted his head up enough to speak "I'm sorry that your time there has been so horrible." He pressed a soft kiss, minding his sore lip, to the top of Dib's head. "What about the psychiatrists? You've been through a few sessions, right?" Of course Dwicky knew, he'd read every statement by everyone that had tried to work with Dib. Each one echoed the same conclusion that the other one did: aliens don't exist; subject is without a doubt nuttier than a can of mixed nuts and twice as mixed up.

Dib nodded his head just a bit, so as to not bother the other. "Yes, but they all told me the same thing. It's why I stayed locked in there. I always tried to tell them I needed out. That I really needed to go back to what was important. They wouldn't listen though." His voice lowered and he buried his head closer to Dwicky's chest. "I guess they were all right though. It still hurts to know that I was always wrong. It hurts that I have to let go of everything I ever wanted to believe in, but after all this time and knowing that everything really is okay, I guess none of it really was true."

A hand shifted up to toy with Dib's hair, running through it and brushing it back from its ruffled state with idle motions. "Right." Dwicky quietly answered. "That's right." He softly praised. "That's a good boy." He swallowed a moment, licking his abused lip. "There's more solid disproof of aliens and paranormal than any real proof. Why don't you name some solid proof and evidence that will help you cement it for you." Dwicky buried his lips in the boy's hair again, muffling the shakiness in his voice "Mkay?"

Dib pulled his head away slightly for the moment. His eyes narrowed a bit as he tried to think over what the other said. "Well, I guess it's kind of hard to do that. I used to have so many videos and pictures I took, but whenever I tried to show them off no one would look at them or people would just come up with their own conclusions for what was on each one." A small frown came to his face and he averted his eyes. "Even when it came to Zim, there were so many excuses to certain things about him. I always tried to prove each one wrong, but it was hard when no one wanted to believe me." He stayed silent for a few seconds before finally raising his head to look up at Dwicky, disturbing the man in the process. "Even that night. I thought that ship and those aliens were all real, but you told me it was a joke. That none of it was ever real. It's just so hard to let go..."

Dwicky raised his head some to look back down at Dib. He scratched his forehead, making a small sound as he adverted eyes for a second. "You know you have to. You know it's the right thing to do. Now come on, let's think together, proof that none of it exists." He cuddled the boy closer, his free hand returning to the boy's hair. "I'll list one and then you list one, alright?" He closed his eyes to think, resting the bridge of his nose against Dib's forehead. The boy was so small; smaller outside the jacket, inside his clothes, small against his chest. Dwicky curled around Dib more. "Let's see... it's been proven there's no life out on other planets. Just rocks, and gas. No atmosphere. No life. Nothing."

Dib opened his mouth, about to protest, such a thing as was his habit, but before a single word could escape him, he quickly shut his mouth, instead he nodded his head softly against Dwicky's chest. After a few moments of silence he slowly spoke up, his voice quiet and hesitant. "Well, it's been said that such things as orbs could just be flickers of light from cameras or other things." He gave a small noise before once again burying his face since he was pressed even closer to the man. His voice was muffled as he went on. "There are even a few facts that point to such things as ghosts not being real at all."

Dwicky rubbed the back of the boy's head, knowing just how hard this was for the boy. "That's good." he encouraged, kissing the top of Dib's head. "That's very good." Taking in a slow breath, he continued on "Sometimes it's just a dirty camera lens too. And also, more often than not, ghosts caught on film are just double exposures of an image. You know, when the film isn't shifted on, and you take two pictures on it instead of one. It happens near the end of the reel most often, I think."

Dib's arm tightened around Dwicky just a bit for only a small second before it let up just so he could fidget with the man's shirt. "I guess so." The small touch on the back of his head soothed Dib for the moment, and caused him to shut his eyes. When he spoke up once more, the question he asked had nothing to do with the small little back and forth they had been talking about, though, it was close. "Dwicky, did you ever believe in aliens, or, anything paranormal at all? Even if a little bit?"

The man frowned considerably and everything inside him fell with it. He was glad Dib had his face buried against his chest so that he wouldn't see. Dwicky wasn't sure how to answer that at all, not at all. And he hadn't realized he'd been holding his breath until his chest started to ache with something other than anxiousness. He let it out in a slow shaky breath, resting his head back against Dib's, and nuzzled close. "I know better now…" Dwicky tried to speak as assuredly as he could, but it came out more solemn "You can't rely on a belief, Dib. You have to believe in what is real."

Dib let out a small, choked noise, though he tried to cover it up as best he could against Dwicky's shirt. "Was it just as hard for you to let it all go? Did you have to go through so much?" After a few moments he lifted his head, showing wet eyes that he had tried his best to hide. "Did you really ever want to stop believing at all?"

Dwicky couldn't speak, his throat felt swollen and any noise he tried to make would only come out as hurt. He pressed his forehead to Dib's, taking up each side of the boy's face with a hand, brushing away unshed tears under the boy's eyes with his thumbs. He could only nod; it was hard, terribly hard. Dwicky forced himself to swallow back the pain, but his voice suffered still "Yea. It was _very_ hard, but I was really stupid too. I was so sure, so _very_ sure that all of it was real. I was so painfully arrogant-.. I found out the hard way...-it hurt far worse when I learned the truth that everyone else had been telling me on and on." Dwicky shut his eyes a moment, his brows furrowing tightly. "I really gave it all up. All of it. Right there and then." Slowly, he opened his eyes again, barely seeing Dib, though somehow he smiled, and it was terribly sad. "I grew up the hard way." He tried to blink away the warm ache in his eyes as he looked better at Dib. "I'm here so you don't have to go through what I did... alone."

Despite the warm hands on his cheeks, another small sound escaped Dib that he just couldn't hold back. "I've always been sure things existed, but now I have to question everything. I don't think it's fair." He leaned into the other's touch before quickly burying his face once more, just wanting to hide. "Right when I try and start to get better, something inside me starts to hurt. It starts to nag at me and I just don't want to believe anything I'm saying. All because I kept trying to prove it all. I was always the one that tried to prove everything was real and suddenly I'm shooting it all down." He shook his head against Dwicky's shirt. "I don't think I can do it."

Dwicky's arms returned around Dib, letting the boy hide away against his chest. He slipped a hand under the loose shirt so he could rub Dib's bare back, offering more comfort with skin to skin contact. "I know you can do it. You're doing so well, especially just a few minutes ago. You can do this, Dib." He took in a shaky breath, licking his abused lip a moment before he spoke on. "C'mon, let's continue on. You need to do this, for yourself."

The hand on his back soon relaxed Dib enough that he quietly spoke up once again. The broken sound left his voice, but he was still completely hesitant to go on with what they were talking about. "So many times I've heard..." He stopped for a few seconds taking in a small breath before going on. "...I mean it's been said that Bigfoot isn't real. That every bit of evidence is man made or that every bit of it is just some horrible trick."

"A guy in a suit." Dwicky finished. "You can sometimes see the watch on his wrist on the footage. It's a tourist attraction, people come from out of town to catch a glimpse, and at the same time, pay anything for merchandise and cabins to shack up in on the mountains. Same goes for the Nessy. She's just a paper mache floaty that someone set on a lake and took blurred pictures of. The pictures are never clear, and they never will be. People discover real things all the time, bring back real evidence but never once in all man kind's existence, and advances with media-taking-technology, have we had one decent photo, or video clip." Dwicky exhaled a long breath. "And we never will." he quietly concluded.

Dib stayed silent after the last few words, keeping his body close to Dwicky's own for the time being. After awhile though, he gave another small sound while trying to free himself from the man's arms, sitting up after he was able to. He kept his eyes on his feet, wiggling his toes on the carpet for a few seconds before he finally lifted a hand to wipe at his eyes, his voice barely a whisper in the room. "Can we stop? I don't want to do this anymore right now..."

Dwicky lay on his back, watching Dib for a second before he nodded. "Sure. We can finish this later." he answered quietly. He pushed himself up to sit, leaning back on the couch's arm. Silent for a moment, he pulled back a sleeve to glance at his watch. "It's probably time for your noon medication anyway." Dwicky shifted to reach, straining an arm to grab the duffle bag and search its contents for exactly that. "I should have looked at the package; you might be a bit late taking them." He frowned.

Dib turned his head once he saw that Dwicky had move around, but it was the bag which really caught his attention. Still not able to look in it himself, he couldn't help but turn around just so he could crawl across Dwicky's lap. There he settled himself with his legs on either side of the man. His head bent forward so he could look inside of the bag as well, curious as to what had been kept away from him for so long. His disappointment from a few seconds ago was gone, for the moment.

"Clothes, clothes and more clothes. Aww, jammies." Dwicky lifted a pair of much too small pajamas with little dinosaurs on them. "If only they were bigger." He gleefully held the shirt up to Dib's chest, tilting his head to picture what it would look like on the disturbed youth. He handed them over to Dib as he went back digging through the bag. From its contents he pulled something out and made a face "Ew. Three year old toothbrush."

Dib took the pajamas and looked them over for a few moments before tossing them aside as if they would bite him. His eyes immediately went back to the bag after ignoring the gross content that Dwicky pulled out. There wasn't much else that interested him in the bag. An old watch that was very much dead lay buried, a few photos that were much too blurred to actually show much here and there. Only one was clear enough, and was of what appeared to be of a younger Gaz who was in mid-punch towards the camera.

Only after a few moments did he lift his hands to dig through the bag, giving a small pleased noise at what he pulled out. One hand moved up to place needed glasses where they used to sit on his face, though a bit snug, and moved back down to hug the old trench coat from long ago.

Dwicky pointed the tooth brush in Dib's direction, smiling that the boy found his glasses. "I remember that. You used to wear that all the time. Inside,", he pointed the toothbrush one way "and out." He placed the icky toothbrush on the coffee table and dusted his hands off on each other. "Kind of small now though, which is a shame. I always liked it." He grinned at himself before shaking his head, realizing just how far back that memory went, and just how wrong his words could imply. Dwicky quickly cleared his throat. "From one jacket to another." he murmured to himself. Dwicky smiled softly though, Dib looked so cute hugging the old, beat up trench coat. "Brings back memories, huh? As short a time as it was... that we knew each other. Things changed drastically from then on."

A small frown tugged at Dib's lips and he slowly pulled the coat away from his body just so he could look down at it. His fingers ran over the worn out jacket for a few seconds before his eyes narrowed, his voice low. "Not the best memories." After the words were said, he took the coat in one hand just so he could let it fall over the side of the couch and onto the floor. After that, he turned his attention back to Dwicky. He crawled further on top of the man, completely ignoring the bag under him just so he could wrap his arms around the other's neck, invading his personal space. "I don't need it anymore anyway."

Dwicky made a small sound as he had both the weight of the bag and Dib on top of his lap. He moved the bag over to make things more comfortable for himself, before he rested his own arms around Dib's waist. "It's too small anyway." He murmured on passing, hugging the boy near, nuzzling his cheek against the boy's head, giving Dib the needed affection that he was trying to claim.

Dib let out a soft sigh at the bit of contact. It had him pressing closer to Dwicky for a few seconds before he gave in completely and lay on top of the other body. He buried his face in the man's neck for a bit before finally speaking in a muffled voice against skin. "I want to forget everything that happened back then. Thinking about a lot of it hurts." He stopped for a few moments, just so he could mess with the collar of the other's shirt, the action was becoming a habit when he started to get nervous or hesitant. "I just want to get better so that I can be with you more often."

Dwicky shut his eyes a moment, petting a hand through Dib's hair once. "We'll make new, better memories. We've made some happy ones so far, haven't we? The sad memories only help us cherish and look forward to the new ones. You have to come to terms with them; you can't just push them aside and forget. I'm sorry to say." He leaned back enough so he could look at Dib's face. "The memories will hurt less to think about if you talk about them. I promise you, I'll always be here to listen to _anything_ you have to say."

Dib stared into Dwicky's eyes for a few seconds, his face no longer buried in the man's neck. Finally, he sat up in Dwicky's lap, but not without placing a small kiss on the other's lips first as some form of comfort to both of them. Once he was settled again, he looked down once more at the other's face before speaking, averting his eyes every few seconds. "All of it is scary. There are times when I want to just forget. I think maybe I am just better off listening to what's being told to me and staying locked up in that small little room. That's the part of me that thinks I really am crazy." His hands twisted in front of him, slowly taking the long shirt along with them in the process. "To hear one person, to hear you say that I'm not. It gives me at least a small, tiny bit of relief. Some hope that I can get better and that I really don't have to stay there."

Dwicky's dark brows furrowed, and it was concern that plainly printed itself on his face. "Dib.." he placed either of his hands firmly on the boy's shoulders, making him sit straight in front of him so he could capture his gaze with his own. "You _will_ get better. You can't get better unless you want to. I can't make you do anything you don't want to." He gave a weak smile. "As much as I'd like to go 'poof' and make everything better, you have to help me so I can help. You can't doubt yourself. It's alright to be scared, but you have to be brave at the same time. Don't give up on yourself, because I won't. I believe in you, I believe in what you can do." Dwicky's hands fell, following down Dib's arms to his worrying hands where he clasped them tightly. "You need to believe in you too."

"I'm trying to..." Dib clasped his hands around Dwicky's own. His eyes finally settling on the man's instead of anywhere but. "I want to get better and I want to get out of that place. It's just a lot at once. A week ago I thought I would be in there forever. I didn't think anyone would listen to me." His eyes dropped back down and he gave a small noise before he went on. "Now you're here and I'm actually outside. I'm not in that jacket. I can't hear the voices. It's all so different." He suddenly became nervous as he went on, a scared tone was in his voice as he raised his eyes just a bit. "I'm doing okay, right? Just a little better, right?"

Dwicky nodded, slowly at first, his smile was weak. "You are. Very well. You have no complaints from me." His smile grew stronger. "And we can take things as slowly as you need. There's no rush. Don't push yourself too hard." He softly rubbed his thumbs against Dib's fingers. "You've already done so much, and done so well in such a short amount of time. I'm proud. I really am." Dwicky leaned forward and pressed a brief, endearing kiss on the boy's lips.

The kiss easily had Dib's tense body relaxing, and when it was broken, the nervous expression was gone from his face only to be replaced with a small smile. He let his eyes travel to the bag that had been moved to the side, and after a few seconds he spoke up, keeping his eyes on what was inside. "If I take my pills then can we go out? I really want to try and get used to being around other people." He turned his attention back to Dwicky. "Maybe if you take me to those few places today, it will help out. Besides..." The smile that had been on his face before grew wider. "...I know I said I wanted to stay inside, but I already miss being outside again."

Dwicky's hand met his face. "The medication!" He'd forgotten in the sudden, unexpected drama. "Right. The pills. Yes, of course. You can go help yourself to get whatever you'd like to drink with it. I don't think it matters what. 'Cuz you're too young to _drink_ drink." The man picked up the bag again to fish through it. "We can go as soon as you take your medication."

Dib watched Dwicky for a few moments before finally crawling off the man's lap and off the couch, letting his feet touch the floor. From there he walked to where the kitchen had earlier been pointed out to him, disappearing into the room. After a few moments there was some shuffling around heard and what could have been a small, happy noise that followed by the sound of the fridge closing. Only after that did Dib come back into the living room, holding a can in his hands, looking more than pleased. "You have cola..." The words were said in a sing-song voice. He stopped beside the couch, one hand letting go of the can so he could attempt to open it, but with no real success, which caused a frustrated pout to form on his lips.

"Found it!" Dwicky let out a happy noise as he produced plastic bar that had each time's medication in neatly divided sections, they rattled as they were presented to the sky mightily. He brought them back down to look them over, the times were etched on each square lid, and although he turned it over in his hands, he saw nothing more. "Hm. Such specifics." His eyes widened as he caught the time for the noon pills. "Oh, crud! Well. Jeez. I'm hoping a few good hours doesn't hurt." Dwicky's attention fell on the pouty Dib. "Aw. Battle with the can unsuccessful?"

Dib only nodded his head in response before he tried his luck a few more times, only to finally get it open on the last try, which caused the annoyed look on his face to vanish. He didn't even wait for the pills to be handed to him, but instead put the can to his lips, taking one large sip from it before pulling it away, his tongue darting out to lick at his lips afterwards. He gazed back at Dwicky with wide eyes before a small grin spread on his face. "It tastes so good."

Dwicky grinned back with a chuckle. "Of course. After several years of tasteless moosh, I suppose anything would taste good." He went to fiddling with the lid of the noon pills, trying to figure out how to open it. "Even _vegetables_." He chuckled and then squeed when the top flipped open. "Here, open your hand." Dwicky took Dib's free hand and dumped the pills into his palm. "Take them all, please."

Dib stared down at the pills for a few seconds, then turned his attention back to Dwicky. At first it seemed as if he would open his mouth to speak, but instead his teeth moved out to chew at his lip and he dropped his eyes back down. He hesitated for a bit longer before finally raising his hand to take each pill, dropping his hand back down just so he could move the can of soda up instead and take another long sip. Only when he was done did he open his mouth to show Dwicky that each one was gone. It was a habit that had become forming in the asylum since he had switched rooms, though just as quickly he shut his mouth and looked away, ashamed he even had to do such a thing.

Dwicky put the pills back in the duffle bag and pushed himself from the arm of the couch. He stole up Dib's chin and turned the boy's head, despite Dib's sudden embarrassment. He took a quick kiss from the boy before Dib could truly say anything. "Thank you." He then let go, moving to stand up from the couch. With a groan he stretched, smoothing down his shirt and tie to no usual avail. "Shall we get ready to go then?"

Those words perked up Dib's mood, and he quickly nodded his head in response. He easily walked away from the couch with the can still in hand and made his way to the door. Though halfway there he suddenly stopped and looked down at his feet, which were buried in the worn out carpet. For a few seconds all he did was stare before turning his eyes back to Dwicky, tilting his head to the side as he looked at the man with a curious expression. "Are you gonna end up carry me around again?"

Dwicky looked back up from Dib's feet as well and to the boy's horrible cute and innocent expression. He blinked several times before he rubbed the back of his head in a guilty fashion. "No. No, I'll lend you some socks and a pair of shoes. Um." he gestured for the boy to follow him into the bedroom. The man walked to his dresser and pulled out a ball of socks which he easily tossed Dib's way. Next, he went to his mess of a closet and dug around, looking for an old pair of too small sneakers of sorts that he might have kept that, for a rainy day for who knows what reason; and it was raining, after all.

Dib sat down on the edge of the bed with the socks in hand and began the task of putting them on. Though it was a bit difficult since the pants he was wearing kept trying to unroll and go over his feet. Every few seconds he would let out a small frustrated sound, but in the end he finally got them on and picked up his drink he had set aside in the process. His eyes were glued to Dwicky's back.

"No. No. No. No." Dwicky ticked the items off as he dug them out, verbally X-ing the things he found that weren't shoes. "I really need to clean this out. So much useless stuff that I really don't need. Oh! Hey! I thought I lost that." He held up a random CD only to toss it in the pile of discard. "HA!" Dwicky bent over, getting right into a pile of junk at the bottom of the closet, practically crawling right in. He yanked out a pair of well worn out sneakers that had probably fit him several years back. The man turned around and produced them to Dib. "These should work for now."

Dib eyed the sneakers for a few seconds before reaching out his free hand to take them. He placed the can between his knees and bent down to place the shoes on the floor, putting both of his feet in each one. They fit other than the fact they were just a bit loose, but he said nothing of it and instead bent down to try and tie them up. It took him several tries to actually remember, but after a mumbled mantra to himself under his breath, he finally got it and leaned back so he could move his feet out to show, proud that he actually did something on his own other than open a can.

"You're a Dib of many talents." Dwicky tapped the toe of the boy's shoe. Rising, he offered his hand to Dib, helping the boy up. Keeping a hold of the boy's hand, he led the boy from the bedroom to the front door, letting go so he could slip into his own shoes. "Have we got everything? Dib clean." Dwicky pointed to the boy's hair. "Dib clothes." then to the boy's chest, "Dib medication." then to the boy's stomach, "Dib shoes." then to the boy's feet. "The Dib." His hand rested on the boy's nose. "Keys, wallet. Hm. Oh!" Dwicky reached over and fished something out, throwing it over to rest on Dib's head promptly. "Dib jacket!"

The word had Dib tensing up, but what he reached up to pull off his head wasn't at all what he thought it was. He rested his eyes on the jacket that he held, it looked as if it would swallow his thin frame. Though it didn't take him long to actually give in and put it on. Once it was on, his hands disappeared beneath the sleeves, but he didn't really seem to mind. Instead, he looked back up at Dwicky while hugging the loose jacket close to his body with crossed arms.

"Wow. You're so tiny." Dwicky straightened the collar of his jacket on Dib. "All my clothes just eat you up." He stole a quick kiss from such serious looking lips. "Comfy? You and your cola ready to go?" Needlessly, he smoothed the coat on Dib's person, from one jacket to another; Dib's crossed arms didn't help the illusion either.

Dib gave a small smile after the kiss and nodded his head in response. The earlier excitement he had felt at the thought of going out easily came back to him. "I'm ready." He raised the free hand that wasn't holding the can so he could grip Dwicky's own and tug the man closer to the door. "Come on. Let's go..."

Dwicky grinned some. "Leaving, leaving." He opened the door and let Dib tug him out. "Oh!" it just dawned on the man as he shut the door behind them, "Damn. I did the smart thing and left the umbrella in the car again."


	12. Sessions 12

** Monsters and Ladybugs **  
** By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating ** PG 13  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** Lint

Chapter 12

Music blared over speakers in high ceilings, and cash registers became completely over worked in a large department store that was settled in the center of the city. It was one of the few places, other than the mall, that people shopped at to buy clothes and other essentials needed for living; among the other optional pieces of everyday life.

It was in that very store that Dib stood with wide eyes, staring straight ahead as if doing anything else would cause the floor to open up and eat him. At first he had been okay with going into the place. After just getting his hair cut and having nothing extremely terrible happen, he figured it couldn't be so bad to pick out a few clothes, though he hadn't counted on there being so many people. Without even realizing it, he gave out a small noise and moved closer to the body beside him, though still kept his eyes ahead.

A comforting hand rested on Dib's shoulder, though not before subtly running through the newly cut hair first; the shaved hair in the back was just too temptingly fuzzy to not touch.

"It's alright, Dib. C'mon, you can do this." Dwicky leaned down to speak assuring words to him. "They only want what you want: good deals on cheap clothes at low, low prices." He rubbed the boy's shoulder and ushered him forward at a lazy pace. "I think the men's section is... over- there." He pointed to the left. "Or, wait, do we want the _boy's _ section?" Dwicky glanced down at Dib and blinked decisively; Dib was so small for his age! "Yep. Definitely _boy's_." He gave a teasing chuckle.

Dib quickly shot a glare up at Dwicky for the teasing, his fear of human contact was forgotten for the moment, after a few quick seconds though, he dropped his gaze back down, allowing the other to lead him through the store and to where the clothes were. Every now and then, his eyes wandered on a certain person or just something that was on display. Once they reached their destination though, his eyes immediately ran over each rack that held every article of clothing. He gave a small, unsure look at everything before turning his eyes back up to Dwicky. "I can pick out whatever I want?"

Dwicky gave a smile and nodded in response. He patted Dib's back, coaxing him to go look. "Anything. Pick out a bunch of clothes and you can try them on in the changing rooms, to make sure they fit." He pointed across the way to the huge sign on the far wall that stated 'CHANGING ROOMS'. "Then after we can swing by and pick up some socks and un--"

"Can I help you and your son find what you're looking for?" a stalky store clerk burst forth from practically no where with great enthusiasm.

The sudden appearance of the woman had Dib jump almost a foot in the air, but it was her words which really grabbed his attention. After he calmed down a bit from the sudden surprise, his cheeks grew a bit red as the words registered and he stuttered a bit while trying to hide behind Dwicky. "I'm n-not...um..." He quickly trailed off, not really knowing how to continue, while at the same time, knowing it wouldn't be a good idea to continue anyway. His face grew redder, which he tried to hide behind the large jacket he wore.

"What is that, hon?" The woman leered forward, craning her head to listen. "I can't hear you."

Dwicky failed at everything else. His face flushed red, and his motor skills died as he raised a hand to point and speak up, but his mouth hung open and little to any proper noise left his mouth.

"Pardon?" the clerk blinked at either, truly daft. "Sir?" She glanced at Dib. "Sirs? You wanted underwear was it?"

"Huh?-..huma.. nyum!-...blagh." Dwicky gave up, letting his tongue loll out. His hand fell back down at his side, and his head fell down as well, defeated. _"Damnit_."

Dib glanced up at Dwicky with a nervous expression for a few seconds before finally turning his attention back on the clerk. It took him awhile to finally get the courage to speak up again, though he was able to not stutter like last time. He still stayed behind Dwicky as he did speak. "We're just looking for now. That's all."

"Are you sure? I know how underwear shopping can be _really_ tough for a father." the clerk nodded her round head. "It's such an _embarrassing_ garment to shop for." if she emphasized the words anymore, the whole store might then and there known what they were there for. "Want me to help you, hun? Without your dad hanging over your shoulder?" The clerk stepped nearer to Dib, rubbing her hands together with eager interest.

Another small blush came to Dib's cheeks before he realized the woman was getting closer to him. The action had him letting out a small noise before he quickly hid behind Dwicky even more, and shook his head against the man's back, his hands moving up to grip at the other for dear life. "N-No..." His words came out just as quiet as before. All the sudden courage was sucked out of him.

Dwicky was turning a rather nice ripe shade of crimson with each word. And he found himself taking a step back, right into Dib, his arms slipped rather protectively back to the boy. He gave a horribly nervous laugh as he waved a hand at the woman, hoping that would dismiss her in some sort of magical 'poof'; it didn't of course. "No! We're fine!" He backed up more, taking Dib with him. "We're- we're- we're going now!" Dwicky sharply turned around to face Dib. Twirling Dib around, he pushed the boy forward. "_Run Dib_!" he squeaked with a nervous laugh.

Dib didn't have to be told twice. As soon as the command left Dwicky's mouth, Dib immediately ran ahead, wanting to get as far as he could away from the scary clerk. He tried to wait up as best he could for Dwicky, but his own fear of the woman had him hurrying ahead a bit. He only stopped when he was back at the exit of the store, his back leaning against the glass doors, ready to sprint back outside if need be.

Dwicky jogged up to Dib, a hand placed on his own heart muttering a 'man, clerks are scary'. He took up Dib's wrist and dragged the boy back into the inner depths of the store. "I didn't mean run completely out of the store." He glanced back, giving a giddy chuckle, the red on his face hadn't died down at all. "We still have to get you clothes, clerk or not clerk." The man looked back in front of himself, murmuring 'preferably with _no_ clerk'. Dwicky headed to a different part of the male section of the store, eyes glancing around for the scary clerks every so often.

Dib gave a small noise at being dragged along, but he didn't protest otherwise. His own eyes moved around as well, afraid that at any moment the woman from before would pop out of nowhere and try to grab him. The thought had him quicken his pace to walk alongside Dwicky, instead of behind him. "You don't think she'll bug us again, do you?" His eyes widened a bit and he quickly looked up at the other. "What if there's more just like her?"

Dwicky's gaze quickly flicked down to Dib. He wrapped an arm around the boy's shoulders, keeping him nice and close. "I'll protect you, Dib!" A look of determination fell on Dwicky's face and he immediately looked around. "No clerk will get you while I'm around!" The look instantly fell as Dwicky yanked Dib over to a rack of clothes with a slight squeal. "Oh! Hey! That's cute." He pulled something off the rack and held it to Dib's chest to consider.

A small squeak left Dib as he was yanked aside. Before he even had a chance to really figure out what was going on, Dwicky already had the article of clothing pressed against his chest and he blinked his eyes in confusion. "Cute?" The blush that had left his face before came back. "Isn't cute usually reserved for girls and little fuzzy things with fur?"

Dwicky paused for a long moment, looking around shifty eyed. He then slowly put the clothing back on the rack, dusting his hands after. "Maaaybe." He cleared his throat into a fist before shoving his hands into his pant's pockets. "Well. Then. Pick something you'd like. Something 'manly' or... -whatever adjective that suits your need." He gestured with good humor to the many array of racks and displays that laid out before them.

A small pout came over Dib's face before he turned his attention to the clothes in front of him. For a few seconds he just stood there, until he finally ventured among the many racks, running his fingers along the clothes. After a while, he finally picked out a small set of clothes and it wasn't long until his arms were full, and he walked back to Dwicky, barely able to look over the pile in his arms. "If I try some of these on you'll tell me what you think, right?" He tried his best to look up at the man, but a shirt on top of the pile blocked his view.

Dwicky couldn't help but laugh at the clothes pile with the dark scythe lock of hair peeking over the top. "Of course. You can model and pose for me." He walked behind Dib and ushered him towards the changing rooms, walking around the many obstacles of clothes racks and other buyers. When they got there, Dwicky waved to the clerk that was putting unbought clothes on hangers. "He's going to try things on." He pointed to the clothes pile with the pointy lock of hair in front of him. Dwicky then walked Dib into the hall with many stalls. "There's a free one. Go ahead and try them on."

Dib nodded his head before walking towards said stall and pushing his way past the door. Once he was inside, he set the clothes aside so he could close the door behind him and lock it. There was shuffling inside after, and clothes could be seen being tossed aside, as well as sneakers under the door.

"I think these are too small..." The words were said awhile later, and his feet curled under the door in sudden nervousness. Though there was a click and the door finally opened, allowing him to come out wearing something completely different. A small, sleeveless shirt hugged his top and below he wore shorts that went above his knees. The outfit didn't really cover his middle too well and he kept trying to cover the skin with his arms.

Dwicky's jaw dropped, and had it not been firmly attached to his skull, assuredly it would have plummeted through the dirty floor, past the Earth's crust, past the core, and straight through out the other side of the planet. He made a few noises, most of them throaty, and an inappropriate warmth crossed over his face. Promptly, he pushed his jaw back up with a finger, clacking his teeth closed. He blinked. "Ow, my tongue!" Dwicky rubbed his mouth and looked around shifty eyed once more, murmuring to himself 'I don't think it's too small'. He bit the nail of his thumb, trying to restrain himself; Dib in wussy shorts, a convenient stall, no on lookers! He hung his head "Damnit." He smiled weakly at Dib. "Yeaaa. I- I think you need to be looking for a few good sizes larger since last you shopped." Weakly, he dragged himself over to Dib and threw his arms around him, making little whimpery noises as he cuddled him. "I want you for my birthday." Life was so cruel!

Dib's eyes widened a bit at the sudden move Dwicky made, though he easily warmed up to it while giving a small noise of his own. "I picked up things larger than this. I must have picked this up by mistake." A grin spread over his face and he tried to hide against the man's shirt, his hands moving up to grip at the other's arms. "Though if you want, I could always keep it."

"Nooo." Dwicky silently dragged the sound out, though it wasn't a convincing statement at all. "We shouldn't." He looked around shifty eyed again. "_I_ shouldn't." The man straightened just enough to look down at Dib, and it was easy to tell Dwicky's reserve was paper thin as it was. "Don't tempt dirty old men. We crumble _very_ easily." Dwicky blinked as he felt his own hand slide down to that naked mid-drift, and he slapped it with his other. "Bad Dwicky!" He playfully frowned as he rubbed his sore hand. "See."

Dib's eyes closed part way at the contact on his skin and he let out a small noise. When Dwicky pulled away, it had him blinking before looking around the small, deserted changing room for a few seconds. His attention soon went back to Dwicky though, and one of his hands shot out to grab at the man's slapped hand just so he could bring it to his lips. He took the middle finger in his mouth and ran his tongue along it for a few quick moments before pulling it away, keeping his eyes on Dwicky's own the whole time, the finger was still near his mouth as he spoke. "I like when you crumble..."

Dwicky had to clap a hand over his mouth to keep the throaty whine in. He dropped it away, lowering it to fidget at his side. "Yes. But we're in a public store-changing-...thingy. There's a- …store man doing hangy stuff just outside the-..." He was fighting a losing battle with himself, already was his brain shutting down as he spoke- literally. "Fugh." he finished after a huge, delayed gap. His damp finger drew along the boy's bottom lip, slipping it past either, back into the boy's mouth. Dwicky's eyes lazily shifted half shut. What was he arguing about again?

Dib couldn't help the small grin that made its way onto his lips, knowing he had won the small argument for the time being. He ran his tongue back over the finger that invaded his mouth once again, curling it around for a few seconds. Finally, he pulled his tongue back, and once again sucked at the finger for a few moments as he pulled his mouth back. Before it was completely out of his mouth, he gave it one last lick and stared up at Dwicky with half closed eyes. The grin was once again on his face.

Dwicky's thick brows rose and it took him a good while before coherent words passed his lips. "There... is not one… healthy, chaste.. thought in my head right now." He glanced down the empty hall, as far as he could tell, no one else was trying things on. Quickly, he shook his head, taking a step back from Dib. "No. Bad Dwicky. Step away from the Dib." He pointed down at the boy's clothes. "Those shorts are lethal. They shouldn't be selling such dangerous clothing here." Dwicky stared longer, tilting his head, caught up with something. "Wow... you have such _supple_ legs." The man physically gawked at himself after speaking, slapping himself as he took a step back. "This is a _family_ store, Dwicky." he scolded himself, shaking his head.

The last few words that Dwicky said had Dib blushing and averting his eyes. Since his hands were free again, they went back to fidgeting in front of himself, before they moved to the bottom of the shorts so he could pull them down a bit. Sadly, that only caused more skin to show. He gave one quick glance Dwicky's way, a small smile forming on his lips at how shaken the man looked. "I'll go change into something else now." With those words, he finally turned around and went back into the stall, clicking the lock behind him.

"Nuuu" Dwicky drew out the word quiet and dramatically, raising a hand to reach for a Dib that was already behind a closed and locked door. "Come back short-shorts." But they were already gone, taken away, locked, in the changing room dungeon. Dwicky lightly pawed at the door before some lady walked into the hall, looking for an empty stall to try on the several dozen pairs of jeans she had in her hand. She gave Dwicky an odd look, and in return Dwicky quickly back stepped, clunking his back against the wall, which startled him. Dwicky cleared his throat and looked to the ceiling. The woman took a stall farthest from them, not wanting to know at all. Dwicky placed a hand over his heart, giving a dramatic sigh. "Crushed. A man's dreams, crushed. We dream of such revealing shorts, but, we never truly find that perfect pair on those perfect hips." He smacked himself again; out dirty, illegal thoughts, out! "How much clothing do you have in there?" Dwicky shifted over to one side, tilting his head, trying to get a small peek under or in the side crack beside the door. "Are there more shorts?" he added quietly and much too hopefully.

There was shifting on the other side of the door. Dwicky's questions had Dib making some noise before he actually answered. "I have a few outfits. Well, maybe more than a few. I won't try them all on though. Just some to make sure the sizes are right." There was some hopping around which was made obvious by his feet under the door as he tried to slip on a pair of pants, a small squeak left his mouth when he almost toppled over. Once he gained his balance back, he spoke up again. "I do have more shorts, but they aren't like the ones I just tried on."

After a few moments, there was a click from the door and once again he opened it bit by bit. Dib stepped out much like before, though this time his clothes actually fit. A simple red and black striped shirt that was just a tad loose on his frame and his hands were in the pockets of a pair of black jeans. He landed his eyes on Dwicky before averting them, as if just as shy about the outfit as apposed to the one before.

"Ohh, that looks good." Dwicky walked up to Dib, giving little tugs at the loose fabric to see just how well it fit. "How's it feel? Comfortable?" Without warning, he tugged the bottom of the shirt up. "The waist of the pants isn't too loose or tight are they?" He gave a tug to the waist, they seemed fine. Dwicky then blinked as he stared at Dib's naked middle once more. "Oh, my, _God_. I sound like my mother." Just as quickly, he tugged the boy's shirt down, taking his hands back with new colour staining his cheeks.

Dib had only nodded his head through most of what Dwicky asked, but it was the last part that had him blinking his eyes up at the man. It took a few minutes before a slow smile spread on his face, and he couldn't help but laugh at the other. It just seemed so silly to him how embarrassed Dwicky looked over what he was doing. He really couldn't help but laugh. It took him only a few seconds to get himself under control, though he couldn't help the small giggles here and there, even as he pointed at the other. "You should see the look on your face."

Dwicky pointed at his own face before placing either of his hands to his cheeks. "I'm beat red, aren't I?" He shook his head, giving a small nervous laugh and he lowered his hands. "I was only making sure things fit comfortably, since it's been so long since you've shopped on your own. Then suddenly, I transformed into my mother. Ugh. No. Bad Dwicky." He couldn't help the few chuckles there afterward, given Dib's adorable giggles. "But, you have things under control, even after several years. Maybe you're just a natural born shopper." He gave a small poke to the boy's belly.

Dib let out a noise at the poke and tried to shield his stomach. "Stop it." The words were said with a small laugh before he walked backwards towards the stall, letting his back hit the door. "I just guessed. Well, I sort of guessed. I picked out some stuff at random, but some of the stuff I guessed my size at. This stuff looked like it would fit me." He gave a small smile. "I guess I was right. Which means the rest of the stuff that's this size I'll probably be okay with, right?"

Dwicky gave a quick glance back down the hall; the woman was still fitting things inside her stall far down the other end: good. He sidled up to Dib, slipping fingers under the new shirt to get at that slender middle underneath. "Well," he drew the word out as he leaned down to peter a few kisses against the boy's forehead, trailing them down to his ear where he murmured "_almost_ all of them did fit." He chuckled quietly. "Though, I am curious to what else you've picked out." Dwicky's fingers tickled higher along Dib's sides.

Dib had to bite his lip to keep in the low moan he would have otherwise let out. He couldn't help but squirm a bit against Dwicky's hands while at the same time, moving his own hands up to place them on the other's arms. After a few moments, he was finally able to let out a small sigh, keeping quiet for the time being. He opened his eyes, which had somehow closed on their own, and gave a small grin. "Well, I could always keep trying things on. It couldn't hurt to be careful." He leaned in to steal a small, quick kiss before pulling back. "Especially if each thing I try on gets you to act just like this."

Dwicky chuckled low, not satisfied with just one public tabboo-ed kiss, he leaned down, trying to capture Dib's lips at every chance he could between words. "Oh yes." he very much agreed. "And," he couldn't help his own grin, all of what they were doing was far too scandalous not to "act how?" Dwicky's hands slipped higher up, dragging the bottom of the striped shirt with it, baring the boy's middle to the air.

Dib blushed a bit at such a display, but he didn't dare stop Dwicky. Instead he made small noises, encouraging the man further. His hands let go of the other's arms, just so he could move them up and slip them around Dwicky's neck, a small smile tugging at his lips. "How would you say it? Dirty..." After the simple word, he pulled the other in for another kiss, this one deeper than the other small stolen kisses, a small muffled noise pressed against it.

Dwicky's chuckle was barely heard as he returned the kiss, pressing Dib against the stall's door. "Mm. '_Dirty_'? Wow. I wouldn't exactly call it that. That sounds, too, well- 'dirty'." He grinned some, touching kisses against the boy's jaw. "I'd call it... being 'interested'." The man's hands raised the shirt higher still, needing to touch the sensitive skin underneath that he was never allowed to because of the straitjacket, that's when the click of the far stall unlocking and opening came.

Dib let out a choked noise halfway between a moan as he heard the other stall door open. As much as his body regretted the action, he pushed Dwicky away, though not without pressing one last quick kiss on the corner of the man's lips. Once he was free of the other's wandering hands, he moved his own down to make sure his shirt wasn't still up, one hand moving up to scratch at the back of his head once he was sure he looked okay.

The woman walked out into the hall, unnerved when she was stared at by two completely dazed males who tried to look everything innocent, and failed absolutely. She walked out of the dressing room area as quick as she could, not wanting to know at all.

Dwicky ran a hand through his own hair, smoothing it down as he watched the woman go. "Wonder what her problem was." he commented idly.

Dib looked back at Dwicky and opened his mouth, about to speak, but shut it just as quickly. Instead, he only shook his head in response to the other, while giving a small smile before turning around to head back into the stall to change once more. The loud click on the lock echoed once again, much like it had the first few times.

The man looked to where Dib had left him for. Dwicky gave a small pout as he reached out a little. "Shorts?" he spoke with quiet hopefulness.

Dib gave only a small sound on the other side of the door. Once again there was a small amount of shuffling, but this time it didn't take nearly as long for the door to open and for Dib to come out. He was indeed wearing shorts, but not at all as short as last time, but not very long either, just barely stopping at his knees. The shirt he wore was white, and near the chest was a picture of a sucker. The shirt stopped just a bit at his hips and almost showed his belly button, but he didn't seem to mind much. He was too busy moving around while looking down at himself. "Hey, I like this..."

Dwicky stared, and stared he did, truly wondering if it was the boys' section that Dib had picked the clothes from; but he wasn't going to complain, oh no. "... I support suckers." He nodded in firm agreement with himself. "And shorts." He glanced away guiltily. "Yeaaa." Clearing his throat, Dwicky looked back to Dib. "You should pick out some nice-nice clothes too. For visiting your family or... other such special occasions. It doesn't hurt to have a nice-nice set of clothing." He tried to preoccupy his anxious tactile hands by putting them away in his pockets.

Dib turned his attention back to Dwicky with the mention of his family and slowly his face fell and he looked down at the floor. "I guess so, but I don't think I would ever visit them. How can I?" His hands moved up to toy with the shirt, twisting the fabric around in the front, only to cause more of his skin to show. "I guess I could always just pick out some nice clothes for special occasions. Whatever those would be. I can't really think of any. I'm not really used to dressing up."

Dwicky tilted his head a little, crossing his arms thoughtfully. "Birthdays? Christmas? School dances? Halloween?" He scratched the side of his head with a slight smirk. "I thought kids now-a-days took any and all opportunities to dress up."

Dib only shrugged his shoulders at that. "I don't know. I never really did that kind of stuff." A small blush crossed his face. "Well, once or twice for Halloween." He raised his eyes back to Dwicky while letting his hands drop back down to his sides. "All of that other stuff was never really very important. Christmas kind of was, but not really." He blinked his eyes before giving a small smile. "I don't think I really missed out on much. It's usually the same thing every year."

"Hmm." Dwicky loosely shrugged as he glanced down the changing area's hall for the hundredth time now. "I suppose we can put off buying the nice-nice clothing later." He settled his eyes back on Dib. "For now, let's just focus on the casual stuffs." The man suddenly snapped his fingers "And sneakers! Shoes. Feet covers." He looked down at the boy's stocking feet. "Under garments. Tooth brush." Dwicky blinked several times as he approached the boy to take his jaw, running fingers over it curiously. "Do you shave yet?"

Dib blinked his eyes a few times before he quickly shook his head. "No, I don't." His fidgeting hands moved down to shove into the pockets of his shorts. "You know, you really shouldn't have to do all this." The small blush on his face darkened a bit. "I mean, buy me so much. I kind of feel bad. Kind of like I'm free loading off of you or something." He averted his eyes down to the floor, no longer able to look at Dwicky in his sudden bit of nervousness. "Sorry I can't really give you anything in return."

Dwicky blinked, tilting his head a little. A knuckle tilted Dib's head up to get the boy to look his way. "No, _I_ owe _you_." And really, he left it at that. He gave a wry sort of smile. "Besides, I doubt you want to go around in public in my old clothes. They really aren't that flattering on you." He smiled some before he relinquished his hands in his own pockets. "Going to try on more?" Dwicky backed up some. "Or shall we go attack the shoes now?"

Dib gave Dwicky a curious stare, but after a few moments a small smile spread on his face. "We can go to the shoes now. I know what will fit me, so I don't need to try on anymore. I'll be okay." It was easy to tell his excitement was once again returning. His hands quickly moved out of his pockets so he could turn around and push at the stall door once again and disappear behind it. His voice could still be heard even as he changed back into his borrowed clothes. "It feels nice to wear actual clothes finally. To try on other things and not wear that jacket for once." He had lifted his arms and the shirt he had been wearing was tossed aside before he moved over to the door so he could try his best to peek over the top to look at Dwicky, only barely able to look over if he stood on his tip toes. "You sure I look okay in what I tried on?"

The man looked over and grinned, giving a nod. "You did." He nodded again. "You did." He recalled the short shorts and he tried to hide his grin by looking away, but it was obvious in his voice "_Very_ much so."

Dwicky rocked back and forth from toe to heel for a moment as he waited, moving his vision one way and then the other, but in the end it rested on the dressing boy inside the stall. "Yeapuh. I like you in other clothes too. Though, _out_ of clothes... is just as good." he commented idly to himself much too loudly. Quickly, he cleared his throat, side stepping towards the stall. "Done?" He couldn't help but peer over the door; his eager curiosity got the better of him.

Dib had pulled away from the door at some point to finish dressing. So when Dwicky peeked over, he was just pulling the borrowed pants over his hips. The man's voice startled him and it quickly had him looking towards the door, his eyes a bit wide as he almost lost his balance. "Huh?" The blush returned to his face, but he stuttered out a response anyway. "Y-Yeah. I'm done." He slipped his feet into the sneakers since he hadn't bothered to untie them, and then reached out to pick up the pile of clothes he had brought in, making his way out the door afterwards.

Dwicky watched the pile of clothes with the pointy black hair try to walk out of the change room. He gave a slight laugh and put his hands on the boy's shoulders, leading him from behind and out of the changing room. "I think it's this way. Shoes are over there."

He turned Dib to lead him towards the shoe section. "I think I'll grab us a cart. By the end of this, we might have the whole store to walk to the car." He stopped them when they were amidst a forest of shoes. "Here." Dwicky took the pile of clothes from the boy's arms and set them on a chair, freeing him of the fashionable burden. "Now. What kind of shoes do your feet want?" He glanced around; the choices were numerous. "Wow. They have a shoe for _everything_."

Dib gave a small sigh of relief once the clothes were taken off his hands, but when he was able to see, he couldn't help but let out a noise at all the shoes he saw. For a few moments all he could do was stand there as his eyes roamed each row in front of him. After awhile though, he walked forward so he could scan the rows close up. He eyed each pair of shoes, one by one, finding a few interesting, but only one caught his eye, which he immediately stopped to pick up. He picked one of the shoes out of the box while slipping a sneaker off his foot and he easily slipped on the new shoe. It was a large black boot, very different from his old ones. It looked more combat in style, though it had a large zipper on the side that he easily did up, and buckles down the front that were for show.

Dwicky hung over Dib, leaning down to look at the shoe the boy had picked out like a needle from a hay stack. "Practical. I was thinking more of a sneaker, but that works too." He straightened back up, tilting his head to still look at the one shoe on the boy. "How's it feel? Not too tight? Room in the toe? You're still a kid so, you need growing room for the feets." Dwicky looked around them; so many shoes! It made his brain hurt. "..Maybe we should get two pairs? Just in case."

Dib looked over at Dwicky before letting his eyes travel down to the boot he had picked out. "I like boots." He shrugged his shoulders at the questions before he twirled his foot around. "It feels fine. It's not too tight at all." He leaned down to unzip the zipper before pulling the boot off, leaving the sneaker off as well, for the time being. "I could get two pairs. It's fine with me. I guess I'm just used to having one pair of shoes." His eyes moved over to the rows of shoes once more, just to glance at them.

"Considering the wet weather we're having, a dry pair of shoes to fall back on." Dwicky glanced at the shoes at well. "Maybe, a pair of sneakers? Or... something else? Your choice." He gathered the boot that Dib took off, putting it with the other and taking the box to the pile of 'to buy' they had claimed on the chair. "I'm sure you'd look smashing in a stiletto." He nearly tripped as he stifled his own laughter.

Dib made a face at the suggestion and shook his head in response, although he couldn't help but laugh a bit himself in the end. He walked back over to the shoes and it took him awhile longer than last time to actually find anything. He ended up walking back and forth a few times before finally, he picked out something else. It was a low sneaker that he put on his foot, simple and white with just a small black stripe going down the side, but printed on the tip of the shoe was a tiny black heart that almost couldn't be seen.

"Have we decided?" Dwicky peered, having taken a seat, sharing it with the pile of clothes. "Found something that fits?"

Dib easily nodded before picking up the box that held the other shoe. He kept the other on just so he could walk back over to Dwicky, showing it off once he reached the man. "It's the only one I really liked. I think it looks good though." He finally slipped the shoe off just so he could pick it up and place it back in the box, putting it aside with the rest of the stuff he had gotten already. He moved to pick up his discarded sneaker, easily slipping it back on once again before speaking up. "That's it for all the major stuff I need, right? I mean as far as trying things on goes."

Dwicky gave a firm nod. "Now. Now it's time for-" he pointed sharply to the evil area they had been where SHE had been "undergarments of the damned." He leaned back as far as he could without falling out of the chair. "I- I don't think I see her." Dwicky rose, handing the shoe boxes to Dib and taking the clothes for his own to carry on the dangerous journey. "Stay close. I leave no man behind!" He cautiously started towards where they had been earlier.

Dib took the boxes, keeping them in front of himself and slowly followed after Dwicky. His eyes darted all around, as if at any moment the scary clerk from before would pop out of nowhere and haul him off to some unknown place. Even the slightest noise of just a small shopping cart nearby had him jumping and hurrying to catch up the few feet he had lagged behind the other.

Dwicky peered past a shelf of jeans, looking left then right before gesturing to Dib that it was safe to follow. He slunk, as best as a man carrying a pile of clothes could slink, down the isle, staying low behind the racks. "Underwear and socks is just up ahead." He whispered to Dib. He pointed as best he could ahead of them; it was almost barren save for the barren racks of miscellaneous clothing that had been ravaged from sales of great, great savings. "If we pass through there, we're basically home free." Dwicky swallowed, glancing at Dib.

Dib gave a small noise in response. One part of him thought it was completely silly that they were being so cautious just to buy underwear, but the other part of him that was so scared that it was telling him to hang on to Dwicky for dear life. That's the part he was listening to, for the moment. Although he couldn't exactly listen very well, since his hands were full so, he settled for gripping the man's shirt as best he could with a few fingers. "Are you positive she's nowhere around?"

Dwicky glanced around. Slowly, he straightened, getting a better view. "I... don't think I see her. No. Maybe she's off work, or lunch break." He stepped carefully out from their hidden location of tacky shirts. "I think it's safe. C'mon." He treaded carefully out into the open with Dib tagging behind him. Past the racks with their metal bones picked clean, they walked, past the shelves with nothing but mateless socks strewn across them, they cautiously continued. Dwicky swallowed, keeping his gaze forward on the underwear section; so close- so close!

Dib kept a tight hold with only three fingers on Dwicky's shirt. The nervous feeling was slowly leaving him as it was made clear the clerk was nowhere to be seen and as they got to their destination, he soon let go of Dwicky altogether. A small sigh of relief came to his lips, although he couldn't help but take a quick glance all around the small part of the store once more. His nerves were on edge once again, as if it was all too good to be true. When nothing happened, he couldn't help but send a small smile Dwicky's way.

The man let out a slow exhale of relief. It seemed they were indeed safe. Dwicky gave a look around, underwear as far as the eye could see, in all colors, sizes, and assortments. He looked from one side and all the way around to the other, giving a dumb noise and an equally as blank expression. "Um. How… about... since you know your size… you pick out what you want, nab some socks and-- I'll go grab a shopping cart." Dwicky tried to keep the look of embarrassment under wraps; he was failing.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky for a few seconds before the man's embarrassment had a slow grin spreading on his face. He leaned down just so he could set the boxes on the floor before he walked over to the man. He stopped and stood just a few inches from the other, and knowing that it was safe, he easily raised his arms to wrap them around Dwicky's neck as best he could, just so he could pull the man down. He easily ignored the clothes and leaned forward near Dwicky's ear. "What's wrong?" The words were barely spoken before he took the small golden stud in between his teeth and gave it a playful lick.

"Ughn... nugh... mmm." Dwicky blinked his eyes sharply, but their awkward situation (and position), wasn't helping. "Um." He glanced around quickly; there wasn't anyone around, just yet, thankfully. "N-nothing. Just, going to get... that..thing... with the- uh.. rollies.. Yea." His eyes began to slowly shift shut, but just as quickly, they snapped open. "Yea. So. You pick out stuff, and I'll... get... that... buggy." Dwicky tried to straighten with the load of clothes in his arms.

Dib gave a weak protest while licking his lips as Dwicky pulled back up. Instead of dropping his arms completely, he let them move down the man's sides, until they rested on his hips. There they moved back up just so they could slide up the other's shirt, barely brushing along skin. "Don't go. There's no one around. You don't really wanna leave me right now, do you?" He ran his hands back down, using his nails just a bit, only to stop at Dwicky's hips once more, his fingers almost dipping past the waistband of the other's pants.

Dwicky made a small, torn sound in his throat; which only proved how much he didn't want to- (anymore). "It'll...-it'll." Damn the heap of clothing he held-! He would have loved to oblige Dib with open arms, but unfortunately they were preoccupied with the boy's clothes. Dwicky gave a weak smile, clearing his throat "Just a second. Won't take long. S-so that my arms don't fall off. 'Cuz I'll need them later." Taking a quick glance around, Dwicky gave the other a quick peck on the lips. He smiled a little wider. "By the time you've picked out a few good pairs of underpants and socks, I'll be right back."

Dib gave a small frown, even after the kiss, but slowly eased up. He let his arms fall back down and nodded his head a bit before speaking. "Alright, fine." With that, he turned around to face the many rows that were in front of him. Unlike Dwicky, he didn't seem at all embarrassed to be staring at a huge assortment of underwear, and instead started picking out what he needed.

Dwicky leaned over quickly, giving a few last minute snooches to the boy's ear so that Dib wasn't completely sore at him, murmuring "I'll be fast. Won't be long. Be good, mkay?" He grinned against the boy's ear. "Your hair cut looks really good. So don't be running off with anyone else, 'cuz I'll be right back." He gave Dib's ear one last kiss before he pulled back with a grin and lumbered off.

The few kisses startled Dib at first, but a smile slowly spread on his face after a few seconds. He glanced towards where Dwicky had been standing, but before he could say anything, the man was already gone. He stared at the spot for a bit longer before finally looking away and down at the few things he had in his hands. He tried to focus once more on picking out what he needed. Although being alone was making him nervous, he tried his best to ignore the feeling until Dwicky came back.

Near Dib came the sound of a shopping cart, but that was much too short a time to be Dwicky. And it wasn't, when Dib looked over, though the sound of kids should have been his first clue. Two toddlers in the cart and a baby strapped in the infant seating, a rather tired looking woman pushed it by, ragged from constantly telling the kids to 'play nice' and 'please be quiet, mommy can't hear herself think'. Just when she seemed at wits end, a man jogged beside her holding bag of styrofoam cups that were on sale. He tossed them into the buggy and the children seemed sated to play with those, instead of pulling each others hair. The woman gave a sigh of relief and she earned an endearing kiss on the cheek from the man, who grinned at her.

'_You're keeping him from that_' guilt, reared its ugly head; for _everyone_ has guilt.

Dib stared at the couple with wide eyes, only flinching when he heard the small internal part of himself. Such words caused his eyes to drift to the kids in the cart, before he quickly looked away to the floor under his feet, afraid that they would see him staring. He didn't want such attention. "I didn't think he wanted that. If he did he wouldn't have chose me, right?" The words came out barely whispered, not wanting anyone to hear him.

'_Assuming only makes an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'. You never even thought to ask, did you?_' guilt went on, heavily.'_What if he does? And, what if you do too? You may get out, Dib, but your record will be stained for life. You won't be allowed to go anywhere without supervision. You won't be allowed to do anything on your own. You won't be allowed near children, let alone have children. You'll always just be a full dependent on Mister Dwicky. A useless stay-at-home. That **isn't ** a family, Dib._' guilt finished somberly.

"That's not true. It can't be true." As Dib spoke, his voice rose a bit, and realizing it caused him to panic. His eyes moving around as if someone were in the aisle with him. "If I get out, I won't be dependent on anyone. If I get out, it means I'll be okay to be on my own. Besides, what if I don't want to be by myself? What if I feel safer with Dwicky?" His hands gripped at the small packages that were in his hands, causing them to crinkle. "I'm out right now. I'm okay right now. I don't have to stay home. I'll be okay."

The family continued on their merry way, the cart rattling noisily as it went. The man slipped his arm over the woman's shoulder and she in turn rested her head on his shoulder; a happy ending.

'_What if Mister Dwicky wants that?_' guilt pointed out, low.

Dib looked back over at the family. The sight had him frowning and the question had him letting out a broken noise. He tried to tear his eyes away again, but he couldn't. "He can't have it. He can't have it because of me." Another small, choked noise escaped him. His next words sounded cracked. "All because of me..."

'_How old is Dad, Dib?_' guilt went on. '_Some where near Mister Dwicky's age, right? And how many kids does Dad have? And he's a big time scientist. Even **he ** had a full proper family, of his own. At one time. Even **he ** did, Dib. You wouldn't be here if he didn't. Isn't that right?'_ _  
_

All Dib could do was nod his head in response to the question, feeling like if he actually spoke at that moment, then he would break down. The family was long gone, but he couldn't stop staring at the space they had occupied just moments before. Finally, his eyes fell back down and shut tightly, as if that would help block everything out. It never did though. "I don't wanna think about this. I don't wanna talk about this."

_Think of the little boy or girl you could be killing right now. Killing them because you want Mister Dwicky all to yourself. You're killing little innocent babies because **you ** love him. Innocent babies that aren't insane, that aren't disappointments. A good little boy or girl who doesn't talk to themselves. They would make Mister Dwicky proud. They would've made Dad proud.' _Guilt chided darkly _'You're a murderer; a psychotic murderer.'_ _  
_

"Shut up!" Dib's wet eyes snapped open after he realized he had shouted the words much too loudly. One of his hands reached up to clap itself over his mouth, not at all caring about the few things that he had picked up fell from his hand as he did so. He moved his eyes all around the aisle, waiting so long for someone to come around and try to take him away just for shouting at himself. Nothing happened though. He was still alone. His hand slowly lowered, but his body refused to relax, his words frightened and no longer loud when he spoke again. "I'm not a murder. Please stop..."

'_Prove it_.' guilt went on snidely '_You can't. The guilty can't prove anything. You, Dib, could never prove **anything**. Not even when your life was dedicated to proving._'

Dib stayed silent for a bit before he slowly shook his head, his free hand moving up to rub a sleeve under his glasses. "If he wanted a family, if he wanted such things, then why would he care about me? Why would he say he loved me? He knows he can't have those things. It's not my fault." He moved his hand back down in front of himself so that he could stare at it. "It can't be my fault."

But nothing answered back this time. There was nothing but perfect silence inside Dib's head; save for a worried thought or two that went without a whisper in passing.

The silence did nothing to calm Dib. If anything, it caused him to become even more on edge. The thought of shopping didn't appeal to him much anymore, and he dropped the rest of what was in his other hand to the floor in favor of wiping at his eyes with both hands. Even the thought of someone sneaking up on him didn't stop him from staying as he was for the time being.

There was the sound of a cart coming to a halt. Dwicky abandoned it so that a hand could be placed on Dib's head; the touch was familiar as the hand that ran through his hair attempted to sooth whatever it was that now ailed the boy.

"Dib? Are you alright?" and in that familiar voice was the equally familiar worry that always came with it. "You've dropped everything."

Instead of answering, Dib dropped his hands just so he could turn and bury his face in the other's shirt. His hands immediately clutched the fabric in a death grip trying to keep the other body as close as he could. His body was still completely tense despite the hand on his head. Only a small muffled sound came from him.

Arms immediately wrapped tightly around Dib, grasping the security he wanted around him. "It's alright now." Dwicky whispered onto the top of Dib's head. "Right? It's okay now. Whatever it was, it's over now. You're going to be okay." He rubbed the boy's back, trying to put back into Dib what had been taken out in his absence. "I'm here now." He pressed a reassuring kiss on Dib's head.

Dib stayed still for a few minutes before he slowly nodded his head. His body slowly relaxed, though it was easy to tell he was still shook up. The tight hold he had on Dwicky was a clear sign of that. He moved his head to the side so his glasses were no longer pressing against the other's shirt, and instead pressed his cheek against the fabric. He wanted to speak, but words failed him after what he had been told.

Fingers ran through the boy's hair, petting down the shaved back of his head. Dwicky continued for a moment before he buried his fingers in Dib's hair and placed another assuring kiss on the top of the boy's head. "You'll be okay." his voice grew a little more normal in volume as he looked down at the boy. "You wanna know why? I found you a little friend. While I was battling with some crazy lady for the last cart in the store, I found you a little something." Dwicky leaned down, tilting Dib's head up just enough to look at him. "And I know how much you like bugs. This lil guy can keep you company... when I can't." Something soft and plush nudge-nudged Dib's cheek; black and red.

Dib blinked his eyes up at Dwicky, but his attention was quickly pulled away from the man at the nudge to his cheek. He gave a small noise as he laid his eyes on what the other held, the worry suddenly gone as he lifted his hands away from Dwicky just so he could grab at it. "It's a ladybug..." Dib couldn't help but run his hand around each spot on the plush, around both eyes and across both the small antenna. When his hand stopped, he quickly gazed back up at Dwicky while hugging the stuffed bug close, his voice low. "Thank you..."

Dwicky finally gave a pleased smile, ease slowly coming to him. "He's soft too, so-" he pet the bug plush on the head "you can take him back with you. And they'll let you keep him in the room with you. You'll have a ladybug in your room… like you told me, about your room at home." He slipped his arms loosely about Dib's shoulders, keeping the boy near. "So you won't be alone when I'm not there. He'll make sure nothing bad happens. So you won't be a sad Dib." He rubbed the boy's back again.

"Just like at home." Dib looked back down at the plush with narrowed eyes. There he kept his gaze for a while, chewing at his lip every few seconds. Finally, a small word left his mouth that was mostly muttered to himself, considering how low it was. "Skeets..." He gave a small smile before looking back up at Dwicky. He freed one hand from the plush just so he could reach up and pull the man down from the back of his neck and place a kiss on the other's lips. Though it was hard for him not to smile against Dwicky's lips, and he had to pull away after a few seconds.

"Just like home." Dwicky echoed Dib, grinning from the kiss. "Like taking a bit of home around with you." He gently ruffled the boy's hair. He took a quick glance around, no one seemed to pay any mind to the old guy being rather close with the younger boy; which was completely fine with Dwicky. He glanced down, but didn't pay the dropped underwear any mind just yet. "So, do you like him? Or her. Whatever it is." He brushed a few fingers against Dib's cheeks.

Dib nodded his head easily while leaning into Dwicky's hand. "I like him very much." His hand moved up to run through the hair on the back of Dwicky's neck, petting it lightly. After a few seconds, he moved forward just so he could press against the man, nuzzling his face against Dwicky's neck. The plush was held tightly between them in one arm.

Dwicky slipped his arms tighter around the boy, hugging him and his bug closer. "I'm glad." He rubbed the boy's back again. "So. Did you pick out what underwear you need? Hm?" he softly encouraged. "Socks too?"

Dib gave a small noise before he actually spoke up against Dwicky's skin. "Yes, I got everything I needed. I..." He quickly stopped himself before going on and immediately went quiet. Instead, he pulled back away from Dwicky, pulling his free hand away just so he could hug the plush close along with his other arm, his eyes looked away. "Yeah, I did."

Dwicky looked around only to land on the floor where things were scattered about. He looked back at Dib with a slight lost for the moment smile. "So... where is it all, kiddo?" He slipped his hands in his pockets, just to keep his empty arms busy.

Dib blinked his eyes for a quick second before he looked down at the scattered mess on the floor. "Oh, right." He bent down just so he could pick up what he had dropped from his earlier break down. Once he had most of it, he went over to the two shoe boxes he had set down, and tried his best to pick those up as well. It was a bit hard, but he managed after a few tries and took it all to the cart where he dumped it. After, he immediately clutched Skeets tightly, staring at the cart, but not really looking at it.

A hand rested itself on Dib's forehead. "You okay?" Dwicky smoothed his hand through the boy's hair. "Dib?"

The touch startled Dib and had him jumping a bit before he settled his eyes on Dwicky. He slowly relaxed after a few seconds and was just about to nod his head before he changed his mind. "No, I'm not." He dropped his eyes back down and his voice lowered as well. "I can't talk about it right now, though. It would be hard to." One of his hands ran up and down the plush. "Something happened while you were gone. Well, not something, but it's hard to explain."

Dwicky continued to run fingers through the boy's hair, brushing back the stray hair from his face. "Do you want time to think on it? And we'll talk about it later today?" He continued to look over Dib's face, having leaned over. "Still feeling good enough to go out and eat? Want to go home? Or sit for a bit? Hm?"

Dib nodded his head, the fingers running through his hair relaxed him a bit more. "I still want to go out to eat. I just need to think about it some more. I wanna try to calm down a bit more and staying out might help." He turned his eyes up to Dwicky. "I can talk about it when we go back home." He shook his head a bit. "I don't wanna stop all of this just because of one problem. I'll be okay for now."

The man nodded. "Of course." He patted the boy's head. "Well, let's get this to check out then." Dwicky moved to start pushing the cart. "Anything else we should grab? Anything you need or want?" He flared out a hand randomly, and of course, it had to be the brassiere that was right there and then next to him. It had him jerking his hand back, as if they would bite his hand clean off. "Yea. Except those. Ha-ha… no."

A small smile came to Dib's lips at Dwicky's embarrassment, always finding it funny when it happened. He was just about to shake his head no in response to the other as they walked until the cart pushed past something that caught the boy's eye. "Yes..." He stepped away from Dwicky just so he could walk among a few racks of clothes, getting lost in them for a few seconds. Only after a few quick moments did he finally come back out, holding what looked like pink PJs that were covered with tiny little ladybugs. He put them in the cart along with all the other clothes and items he had picked up while never once letting go of Skeets. He looked back at Dwicky after with a small smile on his face. "Now I'm ready."

Dwicky had watched, and still though he'd seen it, he really hadn't been expecting what Dib pulled out and put into the cart. Oh yes, that _so_ didn't come out of the boy's section of the pajama department. But, Dwicky wasn't about to deny the boy his ladybugs; sleep wear was comfort wear.

"Alright." Dwicky returned the smile and snagged Dib back to stand beside him, slipping an arm over his shoulder. "Let's go, and then get us some egg rolls."


	13. Sessions 13

**Monsters and Ladybugs **  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox **  
**Rating ** PG 13  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** Lint

Chapter 13

The day was growing much darker by the time the two arrived at the small, little Chinese restaurant on the other side of the city. After they had left the department store, Dib had changed into one of his new outfits, although it had taken him awhile to actually choose which one. In the end, he finally decided on the small sucker shirt and shorts he had been so fond of, with the sneakers he picked out. He hadn't once let go of the plush the entire time, except for when he had to change and was still carried it inside the restaurant with him.

The inside of the restaurant didn't seem to startle Dib half as much as the store did. It was quiet, and no one was pushing. He was content to just look around for the time being, watching people move around or others as they waited for their food.

Dwicky motioned for a table for two and half a minute later, a waiter led them to their table. He ushered Dib from behind, the boy was completely spaced out at the sight of others eating. Their table was by the wall and hanging above them was an oriental painting of a pale pink flower with a small butterfly flitting down to it hung. In moments they were seated, menu'd, and given complimentary green tea, steaming in their oriental painted cups. Dwicky skimmed the menu, sticking out his tongue in thought and consideration.

Once he was sitting down, Dib set the plush aside on the seat next to him just so he could look at the menu. He easily looked over everything, slowly remembering a few dishes from the few years back. His feet kicked back and forth under the table every now and then. At times his sneakers hit the floor, causing a small squeak. After awhile, he set the menu down on the table just so he could lay his arms on top of it, laying his head down as well. He ran a finger down the list on the menu, but didn't exactly stop on anything. At times his eyes moved up to look at people once more. His expression still looked just as troubled as it did in the store, though.

Dwicky dug around in his pocket. He then reached an arm across the table to poke Dib in the nose with something shiny and copper. "Penny for your thoughts?" He offered a smile along with the coin.

Dib quickly looked back at Dwicky at the poke and let his eyes fall on the penny. He moved up his hand just so he could take the coin from the other and move it between his own fingers. "I don't know how to talk about it. It's hard to say. I don't understand it." He let out a small sigh before he let his eyes travel back up to Dwicky's own. "Every time I think I'm happy, there's some feeling that ruins it."

Dwicky sat straighter, naturally folding his hands together as he watched Dib. He cocked his head to the side a little, out of habit. "And what feeling is this? What sort of thoughts run through your mind?" Dwicky pressed his lips together, which only made his mouth seem that much longer and thinner. "This is the second time I've left you on your own and you've been rather… upset. Third, if you count this morning. What happens when I'm not there Dib?"

Dib continued to stare at Dwicky for a bit longer, staying silent the entire time, even after the questions were asked. Finally, he spoke up a bit hesitatingly as he dropped his eyes to the table. "We can just talk, right? You don't have to act like my counselor right now do you? I know that you need to, and some of this stuff is weird, and it's your job. Right now, though, I just want to talk to you. I just wanna talk to Dwicky."

The man blinked a few times and he glanced down to his hands, which were, of course, neatly folded, the rest of him neatly arranged as well. Dwicky cleared his throat, unlinking his hands and smoothing them over the table trying for casual to mask embarrassment. "Yes. Of course. We can just talk." Dwicky nodded as he drummed his hands, which were now a bit lost to where to be put, but finally settled them on the edge of the table. He gave a small chuckle and nodded again. "Yes, I'm here to just talk. Talk away. I'm totally casual Dwicky."

Dib looked back up and gave a small smile before the worry once more crossed back over his face. His eyes darted around a few times before he finally decided it was safe to open his mouth. "I feel different things when you leave. The voices are gone because of the medicine, but now I hear other things." His fingers flipped the penny around over and over as he talked. "This morning, remember how I had to talk to you about my dad? How you saw me crying? I kept feeling so much doubt. That's what I heard." He turned his gaze to the cup of tea in front of him. "In the store when you left though, I felt something different. I heard something else."

Dwicky's brow furrowed some, and he gripped the table a little tighter. "These are your own thoughts you're hearing? or-?... erm." He couldn't help sounding like a counselor considering who he was talking to; in the end all of the questions were relatively the same. He leaned a little closer to the other, near the table. "What did you hear? What happened?"

Dib turned his eyes back to each person that was sitting down to eat. Each person that was paying no attention to them except for the quickest glances here and there. "I saw these people. This family. I heard something in my head and it made me feel guilty for being with you. It told me I was keeping you from what you wanted. You couldn't have a family." He laid his head back down on the table on only one arm. "It's my fault..."

Dwicky thoroughly scratched his head, ruffling his own dark hair at the same time. He gave a perplexing look at that. "A family?" He rubbed his neck.

Dib gave a slow nod that could just barely be seen. His were eyes on a couple that sat on the far side of the restaurant. "I'm just the crazy boy that you're not supposed to love." The words were quiet and even as he went on, he almost didn't speak up enough. "You can't really be happy with me, right? I'm keeping you from something normal. Something you could actually have." His hand that was stretched out tightened into a fist. "You can't have a family if you have me. You can't have anything normal if you have me."

Dwicky stared. "Whoa... whoa." He made a horribly nervous laugh. "Who said anything about having k-kids? ...-a family? Dib." He reached across the table to envelope the boy's small hand in just one of his. "Dib... if I wanted to 'have' a family, I would. But... you know what? That isn't for me." His hand tightened over Dib's, and with his other, he tried to pry that small fist open to slip his fingers just a little between the other's. "You don't need kids to have a family, Dib. You don't need to have a woman and a man to have something 'normal' either. There's no such thing as a 'normal family'. There are single parents who raise kids, they're normal. There are people who adopt kids, they're normal. Aunts, uncles, grandparents who raise children, they're normal too. There are couples who don't even have kids, and they're still family to each other." Dwicky tugged Dib's hand up, and with a safe glance around, he leaned over and kissed the boy's fingers. "If you want.. you, me, Skeets, we can be a family."

Dib raised his head just to stare at their hands with wide eyes before letting his gaze fall back on Dwicky's face. "We can be..." He trailed off and quickly shook his head before letting his eyes fall back down to the table. His eyes slipped halfway shut. "How could that be possible? I'm stuck in an asylum and even when I get out, what if I don't get to see you again? What if you can't find a way to visit me anymore?" His hand tightened once again, even though Dwicky had a hold of it. "Even now we have to be careful, right? How would it ever work?"

Dwicky went silent, staring at their hands. He softly rubbed Dib's forearm with his free hand, it was hard to say who was comforting who in the action. "It just will." he answered quietly. "Tomorrow doesn't matter. Or the day after. Or a month from now. I'm happy with you now, like this. In this dinky Chinese restaurant, just like this. That's all I need._ This_," he squeezed Dib's hand in gesture "is all I need. Just to see you. Heh, the touch is a bonus. Sure, we have to be careful, but so what? Years from now, we won't. But years from now they also promise us flying pigs, who cares?" Dwicky let out a long, heavy felt sigh, watching, fiddling with their hands for a moment. "As long as you get out, and you're okay... that's all I need." His gaze slowly rose back to Dib.

Dib's eyes were wide as he stared back at Dwicky. Finally, after a few seconds, he blinked and it was hard for him to keep the smile off of his face. Every bit of worry and guilt that had settled itself in his expression easily faded away. He clasped their fingers together just a bit more instead of moving across the table and kissing the other like he wanted to. "I'm happy with you too. I'll always be happy with you. Even if all you can do is visit me or whatever." He slowly moved his hand away from Dwicky's a bit just so he could run his finger across the man's palm lightly in what would turn out to be an invisible heart. "I wanna be a family with you."

Dwicky took back his free hand to wipe at his eye, a small sort of choked sound left him, though he quickly covered it up with a soft chuckle. He lowered his hand back down to rest atop Dib's, which traced his palm. He took the boy's hand onto his, still tingling from the unseen heart, and captured it between either of his own. "Then we are." he spoke quietly, petting fingers over the boy's small knuckles. "We're all what we need to be one."

Dib gave another smile though a bit wider than last time. He kept his hand right where it was refusing to move it from Dwicky's until the man moved his own. He found the small touches relaxing and didn't want to pull away yet anyway. Instead he turned his attention back to the menu that had been discarded in front of him on the table during the conversation and started to look over it once again. His free hand still flipping the penny every few minutes.

Dwicky watched Dib a moment, content enough as he was despite being rather hungry from the entire shopping escapade. He was about to ask what Dib was thinking about ordering when a waitress walked up to their table and Dwicky reluctantly took his hands back.

"What will you and your son be ordering this evening."

Dwicky's eyes snapped wide open, a new shade of red painting over his face; making him look like some sort of demented, blushing deer caught in front of headlights.

Feeling that his hand was finally free was what got Dib's attention right away and looking back at Dwicky. Another voice had him quickly glancing to the waitress that had showed up. Unlike at the store, the words didn't cause him to go into a stuttering fit. It could have been his good mood or the fact the lady wasn't trying to invade his personal space. Either way, when he took a quick glance back at Dwicky, he had to hold in the laugh that tried to escape him. He bowed his head, hoping that would muffle it at best and saving Dwicky any real embarrassment, he spoke up first instead. "I'll just have an Egg Roll and Vegetable Lo Mein." He barely glanced back at Dwicky, a small grin on his lips.

"And you, sir?" the woman looked back to Dwicky, looking rather impatient for his order.

Dwicky slowly deflated, sticking out his tongue and making a sound like an airy tire deflating. Quickly, he snatched up the menu to look it over, muttering an 'I didn't mean _that_ when I said family'. "Um, spring rolls, sweet and sour pork, beef fried rice, almond chicken, deep fried wonton, and uh... beef chop suey. Yeaaa." He folded his menu carefully, handing it to the woman. "You haven't eaten well in years- might as well go all out. And... what we don't eat, we can bring home." He looked sky bound, waiting for the woman to take Dib's menu and finally leave.

Dib picked up his menu and handed it to the impatient waitress, watching until she disappeared from sight. He turned his attention back to Dwicky after she was finally gone, and let out the small laugh that he was still holding in, trying to keep it as quiet as he could. Even as he tried to calm himself, it didn't stop him from placing his hand back in the middle of the table just as it was before.

Dwicky snorted, but he couldn't help the chuckle either, raising his hand and flopping it back down on Dib's. "At least we didn't run out of the restaurant this time." He ran his thumb tracing the boy's knuckles. "That would have been a sight. Hm? Alright, you can stop laughing at how stupid I look." He chuckled again and patted at his warm cheeks with his free hand, trying to dismiss it from his face.

Dib finally quieted down after a few more moments, only nodding his head to what Dwicky said. He leaned his head on his free hand as he stared at their hands for a little bit. Only for a quick, split second did he tear his eyes away to look around, only to look back down. He shifted around a bit after, and a few moments later a foot with only a sock touched one of Dwicky's feet. His toes curled on top of the other's shoe much like the first time.

Dwicky blinked and he glanced down, though he couldn't see through the table at what was happening. His toes curled shyly in his shoe as he recalled the first time Dib had done that; it was only just a few days ago, so hard to believe. Dwicky nudged the toe of his shoe back at Dib's, feeling his cheeks warm up again.

Dib gave a small smile at the action, though he still didn't look at Dwicky. Instead, he kept his foot where it was and continued to curl his toes on top of the other's shoe. After a few seconds, he moved his foot up Dwicky's just a bit as his smile turned into a grin that he tried to hide by bowing his head a bit.

Dwicky glanced at Dib, the boy was as subtle as a forest fire, but it was horribly cute. He continued to nudge Dib's foot with his own for a moment. Giving a glance around, he used his other foot's toe to slide his shoe off. Once free, he stretched his toes in his sock, giving a tickling toe to the bottom of Dib's foot with an obvious grin.

The small sensation had Dib letting out a light laugh that he tried his best to keep in. It didn't take long for him to get himself under control, though. His eyes finally meeting Dwicky's own, the grin from earlier still on his face. His foot moved around under the table just so it could sneak under the other's and give it the same treatment. Though he didn't keep at it for long, and soon he was moving his foot up Dwicky's leg as far as he was able to reach, which wasn't far enough to his liking.

Dwicky had to clap a hand over his mouth to keep the giddy squeal in. He hung his head, trying to hide the warmth on his face and the laughter, but the giggly sound could still be heard despite all he did to stifle it.

Fortunately for Dwicky himself, his legs were far longer than Dib's. He stretched his leg and tickled the back of the boy's knee with a toe. From there he drew his toe up, slipping inside the loose fabric of Dib's shorts to run along the boy's thigh.

Dib had to keep his own small bit of laughter in at the small tickling. His teeth bite at his lip until he felt Dwicky's toe move inside his shorts. The feeling had him squirming a bit, and he couldn't help the tiny noise that escaped him, which was thankfully drowned out by the many conversations in the restaurant. It didn't stop him from blushing though. He tried his hardest to move his foot farther up Dwicky's leg, but was only able to move to the man's knee. Even that caused him to slide down his seat.

Dwicky gave the other a mischievous sort of look as he let his foot back down to the floor, resting it back on his shoe. He nabbed Dib's foot on his knee. "Gotchya." Holding onto it, he tickled the bottom.

Dib's eyes snapped open but the sudden tickling had him letting out a laugh that he had to cover up with his hands. He tried to twist his foot so that he could free it, but doing so almost made him slide completely out of his seat. He moved his hands away from his mouth just enough so that he could speak, although his laughter could still be heard. "S-Stop it. No f-fair. Let go."

Dwicky grinned deviously as he tickled slower near the middle of Dib's foot. "You have to say the magic words."

Dib gave a small whine although it turned into a giggle, despite how much he tried to fight it. He had to cover his mouth once more for a few seconds before he could finally speak again. His words hushed. "I love you. Now p-please let g-go." He gave another low whine that sounded far from frustrated.

"Aww. How can I resist that?" Dwicky stopped his fingers from tickling and their motions massaged a moment before he relented and let go of the foot.

Dib relaxed a bit as Dwicky massaged his foot. When the man let go completely, he let his foot drop back down so he could let it rest back on top of his sneaker. He moved his body back up in his seat so that he wasn't in danger of landing on the floor, and stuck his tongue out at the other playfully before giving a small smile.

Dwicky rested his head on a hand and grinned. His foot slunk from his shoe over to Dib's to gently toe at the other's. Dib blinked his eyes, but slowly the smile returned to his face. He curled his toes beneath the sock until they pushed out to press against the other's. Once settled, his toes curled around Dwicky's.

Dwicky lightly rubbed his toes against the other's toes, the side of Dib's foot, whatever his toes could touch. And Dwicky couldn't help but chuckle, the hand on the table tracing the texture of the table cloth near the edge, as it really had nothing better to do. "I like this better here, than before a week ago. A week ago you used to jump at the slightest of any touch." Dwicky gave a small solemn sort of sound that only hindered his grin a little. "Sorry, about that, ya'know, making you jumpy."

Dib shook his head a bit while resting his hands on the table. One of his fingers traced the penny that had been discarded to the side during their time of playing around. "It wasn't your fault. It probably could have been anyone. I guess." He averted his eyes to look away from the table and stare at all the other people. "I don't know. I do know it's really easy for me to stay calm while I'm around you though. Some things still scare me, but not so much anymore." He ran his own toes along the top of Dwicky's foot for a few seconds before turning his attention back to the man.

Dwicky nodded against his hand, his eyes shifting half way shut. He let the analytical talk slide, not pressing Dib for answers, not right now. This was nice, it was nice to enjoy just a casual evening, a meal, footsies; very mature. "Hey Dib..." he started straight out of no where, "could you just, I dunno, tell me stuff about you. Doesn't have to be anything profound, just, something as simple as your favorite color or inanimate object."

Dib cocked his head to the side at the questions, not really expecting them. "Stuff about me?" He turned his eyes up at the ceiling as he thought it over. It took him a few moments to actually answer, a small noise coming from him every now and then. "I'm afraid of mice. I remember one time there were a few of them in the house near the fridge and I had to bug Gaz to get rid of them. She picked one of them up and kept walking towards me with it until it bit her." He looked back down, but instead of meeting Dwicky's eyes, he looked at the table. "I hate pizza. I only ate it when I had to. When I used to go to Skool, sometimes I would stay after just so I could stay and have the monkey bars and swings to myself because those were the only parts I really liked. I guess I like heights a lot." He blinked his eyes and looked back up, giving a small smile before he spoke up again. "And my favorite color is blue."

Dwicky returned the smile widely. "Blue is a great color." He chuckled some "I once ate pizza for almost an entire month. I was too lazy in college to bother cooking... needless to say, after that I couldn't look at cheese or circles or triangles without feeling queasy. So, I forced myself to try my culinary skills. True, it's more time consuming, but it's kinder on the pocket book, plus it's much healthier." He smirked some. "Well, most of the time."

Dib moved his hands up just so he could rest his elbows on the table. His chin easily rested on the palm of his hands. "You've talked about college before." A curious look came over his face. "What's that like?" His smile grew a bit. "Besides, it's your turn to tell me some things about you. Except the fact you can't stand pizza anymore."

"Well," Dwicky drew out the word as he looked up thoughtfully, "it's... a lot like hi-skool, except with dorm rooms. No, no it's nothing like hi-skool, it's a lot worse." He smirked some. "More books, more home work, more hands-on work, more studying- well- yes and no. You learn _very_ quickly that coffee is your very bestest friend _ever_." He laughed some and drabbled his fingers of his free hand on the table, watching them. "There's no getting any sleep. That's usually done _in_ class, most of the time. Looking back, I'm not sure how I did it either. I was always broke, _always_. Desperate in a lot of ways. But, hey, the journey is half the venture, right?" He made a slight 'hmm' as he recalled a few memories, stretching his fingers over the table cloth.

A hand moved out across the table just to lay itself across Dwicky's, fingers tracing lazy patterns on skin. Dib laid his head down on his other arm while watching his own actions. His voice quiet when he spoke up. "You told me you like what you do. Going through all of that; it doesn't sound very worth it, but was it? Couldn't you have done something else? Why be a counselor?"

Dwicky gave a loose shrug, entranced by Dib's motions. "Children were the next best thing to little green men, I guess. It just seemed like the most logical step next to that. I never put much thought into being anything else. It kept me busy, and for the most part, 'entertained'." He gave a slight chuckle. "Kids are messed up little beings on their own. You never know what they'll do next. They're more unpredictable than a tornado... and just as destructive. They're scary like that."

The small patterns had turned into another heart with two small invisible letters. Dwicky's words had Dib letting out a small noise, and his eyes turned to look back at the man. His actions stopped for just a second. "They can be, I guess. Scary, I mean." He looked back down, but didn't move his finger right away. "I'm still a kid though so, I guess I can't say much."

Dwicky's thick brows rose a little, though he still looked at their hands. "Well, more teenager than kid, I'd say." The slightest of knowing grins perked on the corners of his lips. "Cuz, kids definitely don't kiss like _that_…"

A small blush came over Dib's face. Slowly, his finger went back to it's slow motions. At the same time, though, he spoke up once again, a small grin on his face as he did. "And how would you know that? Do you go around kissing kids just to test this theory out?"

Dwicky let out a soft snort as he grinned a little. "No, you're the first. And sad to say, the only that I will. So, I guess my theory isn't very conclusive is it?" he teased.

Dib finally dropped his fingers on top of Dwicky's hand and let them rest there. He turned his eyes back to the man and couldn't keep the grin off his face even if he tried. "Sad to say? So, does that mean you would rather be kissing other little boys?" The teasing tone in his voice was much too obvious. "Hmm?"

Dwicky closed one eye and laughed. "Hmm, even if I did, I doubt they'd wanna kiss me back." He turned his hand around so he could keep Dib's in his, running his fingers against the other's. "Unless you have some _very_ open minded friends to share." He couldn't keep the chuckling in at his teasings.

Dib shook his head a bit. "Nope, sorry." He tightened his fingers around the other's before going on. "Even if I had any, I wouldn't share you. I would keep you all to myself." He raised his head off his arm just so he could rest it on his palm once more, leaning forward just a bit. "It seems like you'll never find out who is the better kisser."

The man made too thoughtful a noise and grinned soon after. "Hm, what I _do_ know is that for someone whose never kissed much, you sure kiss rather well." Dwicky's teasing grin grew wider as he winked. "Something you're not telling, Dib? Hmm?" He leaned closer, resting his other arm on the table "Did you suck door knobs growing up?" he tried to stifle his laughter against a hand.

The light blush on Dib's cheeks grew darker. For a few seconds, he blinked his eyes until finally, the grin fell back into place on his face. The blush refused to leave, despite how calm he seemed. "I'm just a really quick learner. I am supposed to be a genius after all."

Dwicky's brows rose with peeked interested and the grin could only grow more suggestive. "You don't say."

Dib easily nodded his head. "That's right." The grin on his face grew as he leaned in a bit more towards Dwicky. The hand he had used to prop up his head dropped back down onto the table. "Just think. If I'm such a quick learner for that, imagine what else I could learn."

Dwicky's cheeks grew warmer as he stared at Dib. His neck blushed and he had to look skyward and laugh with embarrassment. "...Wow." He looked back to Dib with a catty smile and pointed at the boy "_You_ have a dirty mind." said the pot to the kettle.

Dib gave a small noise before he spoke up again, the grin still never leaving his face. "I never implied anything dirty." Although he was trying to sound innocent, his expression caused him to fail. "You must be the one thinking dirty thoughts." His toes moved up Dwicky's foot, just barely under the table.

The touch startled Dwicky slightly, considering the conversation, and it had the color on his skin growing darker. He cleared his throat into a fist, but it did nothing to fix his already guilty appearance. "Was not."

A waiter then approached their table, placing their food on the table; there were quite a few plates to make room for.

Dib pulled his hand back as soon as the waiter came, and was happy enough to let his eyes roam over every plate set in front of them. He didn't realize until that moment how incredibly hungry he was, and it was hard for him not to want to just start eating. He stayed patient though, even if he was fidgeting.

Once everything was set down, the water left. Dwicky blinked down at all the food. "Wow. I didn't think I ordered so much." He grabbed and unwrapped his wooden chopsticks, tugging them apart. He then had the fun of trying to remember how to hold them. "Oh. There we go." He grinned and made them tack-tack towards Dib. "Alright. Dig in. You need to eat something anyway." He shook his head in that worried fashion of his "So thin."

Dib didn't need to be told twice. He picked up his own chopsticks trying his best to be careful as he broke them apart. The end result took a lot longer. He gave a small noise when he got them apart, and took his time trying to figure out how to hold them. It took him a bit longer, but finally he was able to hold them just right. He eyed all the food in front of him, looking a little lost as to what to eat first. After a few moments though, he moved his chopsticks out to take a piece of chicken in between them and bring it to his mouth to eat. A pleased noise came from him immediately, as he chewed it.

It was the vegetables in the chop suey that Dwicky attacked first. "Mmm. This place is still the best place to go to. Good food, good portions and a decent price." He picked up a spring roll and made quick work of it. "Mm. These are good. Try these too."

At the last thing Dwicky said, Dib had already been stuffing his mouth with noodles. So, when he looked up at the man, a few hung from his mouth. He tried his best to slurp up the rest of the noodles while moving his hand out to pick up a roll. As soon as he was able to, he bit into the egg roll, not satisfied with just one bite. He easily finished it off in just a few more. His hand moved out to grab at some of the chop suey next. "This is all much better than what they feed me at the asylum." He brought his chopsticks back in front of himself and turned them over, looking at the food that was held between them. "It's gonna be strange going back there after such a nice day."

Dwicky chuckled some, picking up some chicken. "We can always go out again. Like I said, your father gave me written permission. So, you aren't restricted." He watched Dib try to stuff more than what his mouth could chew. "Don't worry, the food will still be here after you chew." He laughed "_If_ you can chew." Dwicky ate some chicken, drinking some tea soon after.

Dib nodded his head just a bit while still looking at his chopsticks. "Sort of like an actual date, here and there. Only no one can know, and everyone thinks you're my dad." He looked back at Dwicky and gave a small smile before finally eating the food he held. He chewed slower, actually enjoying it this time instead of quickly moving onto the next thing. His hand idly waved around the chopsticks.

Dwicky nearly choked on the next spring roll he had been eating. He coughed a few times, patting his chest with a fist before quickly downing some tea. Clearing his throat, he mock glared Dib's way, his cheeks warming over again. "Well, when you put it that way, it's just _completely_ romantic."

Dib gave a small grin and leaned forward as best he could considering the plates in front of him. He rested his hands under his chin, trying to look as innocent as he could. His hands folded a bit. "I'm sorry. If you want, I could always wear those shorts you like the next time we go out to make up for it." The grin on his face got bigger.

Dwicky's eyes snapped open. Oh yea, they'd bought those shorts. He'd forgotten. He didn't even realize they were still in the pile until after they rang through the till. Damn those guilty pleasures.The man's face got only hotter still. "I-in… Wear _those_ in public?" Dwicky sunk a little lower and he stifled an immature laugh. "Is that even _legal_?" he whispered with a grin.

Dib unfolded his hands just so he could reach over and pick up a piece of chicken. "I think anything legal flew out the window the first time you kissed me." He brought the food near his mouth but stopped just a bit short so that he could look back at Dwicky, grinning once again before he spoke. "Wouldn't you say?" With those last words, he ate the small piece, only to settle his hands back the way they were under his chin after.

Dwicky gave a nervous laugh before his head met the table in defeat. Soon to follow was a delayed 'ow'.

Dib gave a small, pleased noise; he had won. He reached his hand over, holding the chopsticks, just so he could poke Dwicky in the head with them. "I win." He pulled his hand back just a bit, and waved it around once more. "Besides, the next time I wear them I won't have to take them off so soon." He made a small, thoughtful noise. "Unless you want me to." He poked Dwicky in the head again playfully.

The man made a muffled groan at the dirty teasing and pokes. "You're horrible. Innocent one moment, then completely dirty minded the next. It's gotta be those raging hormones... it's gotta be. This is just evil, evil, evil." he shook his head against the table. Finally, he raised his head some and rubbed the red mark left on his forehead, going cross eyed a moment to look at it. He gave Dib another mock glare. "You really do catch on quick."

"I told you so." Dib pulled his hand completely back so he could grab at some noodles and try to slurp them up once more. A bit more successful than last time, and let his tongue dart out to lick at his lips after. "Why? It's not a bad thing, is it?" He was having way too much fun teasing Dwicky. Even the innocent act he was trying to pull completely left for the moment.

Dwicky narrowed his eyes in good humor, then grinned. "Well, better I love you for your mind than for your young, perking adolescent body." He picked up the chopsticks he dropped, going for the deep fried wonton. "I guess the soft, supple thighs are just a bonus, hm?" He laughed before stuffing the food in his mouth.

Dib blushed at that, and for a few moments it had him staying silent. Finally, he spoke up once again, the smile returning to his face, though it was obvious he was still a little embarrassed. "Maybe it would be safer for you to love me for those reasons instead." He moved the chopsticks up to circle near the side of his head. "I have crazy stuff going on in here. It might get dangerous." He gave a small grin.

"As lovely and lickable as your thighs are, Dib, I can't help but love the entire picture." Dwicky pointed his chopsticks at Dib. "Crazy or not, I want all of it. Even three years ago, you had promise and appeal." He paused mid twirling of his chopsticks and coughed, shaking his head. "Yea, I am so not helping my legal case here." He pointed at Dib again. "You're just a kid, you're not suppose to know what's legal and not." He grinned.

"I thought I was a teenager, not a kid?" Dib smiled a bit at being able to fool around with Dwicky's words. His hand moved back out to pick up an egg roll. "Three years ago, hmm? So does that mean three years ago I was just as lickable?" He couldn't help but laugh a bit at his own question, biting at the egg roll to try and quiet himself.

"Hmmmm." Dwicky hummed in consideration as he chewed then swallowed. "Wouldn't that be robbing the cradle?" He plucked up some almond chicken and held it to his mouth. "Or better yet, wouldn't you be robbing the grave?" he grinned before eating.

Dib was only able to shake his head for a few seconds, since his mouth was full. Finally, he was able to talk once he swallowed. His hand held the chopsticks, moving them to his chest. "Not at all. I would have been completely innocent." Although, he gave Dwicky a look that was far from innocent. "You're the one that thought I was appealing."

Dwicky raised his chopsticks like a boyscout would in all honesties, of course the grin he was trying to hide didn't help. "I swear to you my intentions are completely innocent. Cross my heart." And he did with the chopsticks. "You were a real energetic kid with real initiative. You still are. That's what I liked back then..." He lowered his hand to rest on the table.

Dib gave a small smile at that. He lowered his eyes down to the food, while at the same time, moving his chopsticks out to twirl around in the noodles. "I haven't had to worry about anything for a while. At least not since we got here. We just joked around this entire time, and it just seemed like there was nothing wrong with me. As if this was just completely normal." He gave a small smirk. "Or as normal as it can get." He twisted the chopsticks around a bit more. "You really weren't lying this time." He raised his eyes up to meet Dwicky's again. "You really are helping me."

Dwicky didn't meet Dib's gaze, he seemed preoccupied with watching the boy's chopsticks mess around in his noodles. "Ya know... sometimes I wonder. I wonder what things would have been like if I stayed." He pressed his lips into thin thoughtful lines. His voice fell quieter before he went on. "That thought kept me awake for many nights. So many what-ifs I gave up on, but this one... I couldn't forget." Dwicky went silent for a second. "Would we be where we are right now... if I didn't leave?" He glanced at his own chopsticks, then the food in front of him, then gave a sharp blink, raising his head as if it all dawned on him. He shook his head. "Sorry. That was a bit deep and depressing, wasn't it?" He snatched some chop suey to keep his mouth busy.

Dib blinked before letting his eyes fall back down. Instead of picking up any of the noodles, he continued to toy around with them instead, speaking up only after a few moments. "Here, now? No, we wouldn't be. I guess it's kind of hard to say since none of it was real. I wanted you as my partner, but if you had stayed, would that still have happened? My guess would have been no." He laid his chin in his palm much like before while keeping his eyes on the noodles. "I might have still seen you every once in a while. The teachers usually sent me there once a month, if not every week." He finally raised his eyes again and smiled just a bit. "I'm sure it never would have ended with us in a Chinese restaurant playing footsies and talking dirty, though."

That had Dwicky physically perking, and he grinned weakly over at Dib. "Oh, I dunno. It might have." He gently nudged with the foot that was still under Dib's. "Three years of seeing you once everywhere, watching a boy turn into a virile teenager... I might have asked you out, if not given you," he squiggled his brows with each word, "_special therapy_." He couldn't help the small laugh.

Dib couldn't help the blush that returned to his face and he bowed his head to try and hide it. He stayed silent once again before giving in and speaking up, his voice just a bit hesitant. "Did you just start to care about me while you were helping me at the asylum, or did thinking about all those what ifs make you realize such a thing?" He finally stopped twisting the noodles, just so he could pull some out and slurp them up.

Dwicky went silent, a new warmth capturing over his face that drew to his ears and neck. He chewed on the end of his chopsticks. "W-well..." his voice petered with nervous embarrassment.

Dib blinked his eyes at Dwicky's sudden nervous state. It had him moving his head off his hand just so he could look straight at the other. His voice was curious. "Well?"

Dwicky poked at the last lone spring roll, but it wouldn't delay any inevitable. Unless-! He plucked it up with his chopsticks and offered it to Dib with a wide, guilty grin. "Want the last spring roll?" He could completely distract Dib with the offering of food! (Okay, so it was a terrible plan)

Dib moved his own chopsticks out to take the roll, pulling back just as quickly, but not biting into the food. "You're stalling." He gave the man a look. His curiosity was still in his gaze, though there was a bit of frustration there as well. "Why are you so nervous? Just tell me."

Dwicky pouted at the fact that his plan failed him. He took a chopstick into each hand and tapped the tips together. "Well... if I say I started to care when I first came back that would seem kind of weird… -and if I say before.._that_ sounds even weirder... –and... stalkerish." He tapped the points together and glanced over at Dib.

Dib blinked his eyes before averting them to the roll he still held between the chopsticks. He stared at it for a bit, while biting at his lip, before he lightly shrugged his shoulders. "Not really. It would make sense if you said either one. Either one means you cared enough to come back for me, obviously. I don't see it as weird or stalkerish. You cared enough to come back and make things right, even though you didn't know the circumstances." He looked back at Dwicky. "Even if you cared before then, at least that helps me believe even more that you didn't forget about me. Not that I think that now, but I mean, considering what happened."

"I didn't." Dwicky quickly spoke almost interrupting Dib. "I didn't forget about you." He shook his head slowly. "I thought about you… almost everyday. Last year, it might as well have been every second. It really hurt to know you'd been put away for something so... so silly, that could have been prevented a long time ago." Dwicky put his chopsticks back in one hand again to properly hold them. "I didn't know what to expect But I-... I guess... it really hit me when I first saw you again. Everything came crashing down, but at the same time, it fit perfectly into place." Dwicky glanced at Dib. "I guess, maybe it was both." He smiled weakly.

Dib gave a small smile back before finally biting into the spring roll. He chewed at it for a bit before swallowing, which allowed him to speak up once more, a small, teasing tone to his voice. "You must have been horrible company for your friends if you were moping around because of me all the time." He gave a small grin before biting into the roll once more.

Dwicky mused at that as he poked at what was left on the plates before eating some. "Yeaa, I have to admit, as the months dragged on they wanted to get rid of me as much as I wanted to come home." He chuckled as he ate more.

"Well, now I have you all to myself." Dib took up some more of the chop suey, chewing at it before he went on. "As greedy and selfish as that sounds, I think I'm allowed to say it." He set his chopsticks aside and stretched his arms up after. The shirt he wore riding up a bit with the action, then fell back down as his arms did. "That is, unless you start to love some other crazy boy." He gave a small teasing grin.

Dwicky shook his head. "No, you're under my skin pretty deep. There's no other crazy boy that could match you." He picked at a few things. "At least, there's no other crazy boys that could get away with wearing such short shorts like you do." He grinned. "Full?"

Dib nodded his head a bit. "Yeah. Very full." He turned his eyes back to the plates. "I guess I was pretty hungry. I just didn't realize it until I actually had all the food in front of me." He looked back at Dwicky and gave a small smile. "Thanks again for all of this. Despite what happened in the store earlier, I really did like today. I actually felt normal."

Dwicky grinned passed the chopsticks "You are normal." He looked over the plates. "And I think you ate over half of everything. Wow. I might have to roll you out the door and wedge you into the car." He chuckled. "But I'm glad. And, I have a surprise when we get home." Dwicky leaned over and tried to glance through a window. "I think it's finally started clearing. The rain is gone."

Dib didn't pay attention to much else Dwicky said except for one part. "Surprise?" He leaned forward in his seat. His hands gripped at the edge of the table a bit in his sudden anxious state. "What kind of surprise? What is it? Tell me, please." The last part came out as a whine.

Dwicky turned and blinked, grinning when Dib was baited on one word. "You'll see. Just wait." He lifted a hand to glance at the time. "Wow. We should get going then. Grab Skeets, and I'll go pay." Dwicky stood up from his seat with a groan, stretching. He nearly tripped when his footing came uneven and he glanced down to see one stocking foot. "Oops." he coughed, rubbing the back of his neck. He quickly scooted the shoe out from under the table to slip it back on his foot.

Dib pouted a bit, but to see Dwicky trip had a small laugh coming from him and his disappointment forgotten. He reached his arm over so he could grab Skeets, while his foot moved around under the table just so he could slip his sneaker back on. Once he was okay to stand, he did so, moving out from the seat to stand next to Dwicky with the plush clutched to his chest.

Dwicky walked over to the register with Dib in tow and paid the bill. He was handed a small baggie with two fortune cookies and handed one to Dib as he put his wallet back into his pants. "Go ahead, open it. See what great wisdom cookies bring."

Dib took the cookie and with one small crack, broke it open. He easily pulled the thin slip of paper out while keeping hold of the cookie. His eyes scanned over the small words. "You are almost there." He blinked his eyes. "I guess that's good...and...um...wise." He looked back at Dwicky as he took one of the pieces of cookie and chewed on it.

"You are almost there." Dwicky grinned as he put his arm over the boy's shoulder as chummily as he could without other's paying a second look to the action. He led the boy to the door, opening it for him so he could step out first. He took out his own cookie and cracked it open and tugged the small slip of paper out to read. " You will make it with a sexy fourteen year old in glasses, who has the greatest pair of legs this side of the Earth'." Dwicky flicked his eyes from the paper to Dib. "Hm. I think I should listen to cookies more often. They are indeed wise."

Dib blushed hotly at that, but couldn't help the grin that also spread on his face. "I think your fortune is much better than mine." He put the slip of paper he still held in his pocket. The other piece of the cookie went into his mouth as well to be chewed on. The fact that the rain had stopped had his eyes traveling to the sky for a brief moment before he realized he still had to walk a bit, letting out a small yawn on the way to the car.

Dwicky grinned widely as he caught up with Dib, slipping a proper arm around the boy to pull him to his side as they walked to the car. "I tend to agree." He gave the boy a quick kiss, missing his lips completely as he shoved the real fortune into his pocket to be forgotten.


	14. Sessions 14

**Monsters and Ladybugs **  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox **  
**Rating ** PG 13  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** Lint

Chapter 14

The door to apartment 312 opened slowly, allowing the two in the hallway to enter. Dib easily pushed the door open the rest of the way with his free hand, since his other was occupied with a bag. Not wasting any time at all, he headed straight for the couch, sitting down right in the middle of it and placed the bag in front of him. He slipped off his sneakers with just a toe each, letting them lay beside the bag on either side. Once that was done, he gave a small noise, and it seemed as if he would just sit there for a bit, but that wasn't the case at all. Just as quickly as he had sat down, he moved over to the arm of the couch just so he could watch Dwicky, his hands keeping Skeets between himself and the arm. "So, what's the surprise?"

Dwicky settled the other bags beside the wall on the floor as he blinked at the excited boy. He gave a wry grin. "You want it now? Now now? You don't want to sit down for a while and let the food settle in you?" He dusted his hands off before giving his arms a stretch above his head with an audible, pleased groan.

Dib shook his head quickly. He fidgeted a bit as he watched Dwicky, but tried his best not to seem too anxious. "No, I'm fine. Please? I really want to know what the surprise is." He tried to settle down as best he could. It didn't do much good, though. His feet were still twisting around behind him on the couch. His toes curled in his socks every few seconds.

Dwicky looked skyward. "Well... I don't know." He spoke in mock ill consideration. "It might be too much excitement for just one day." He crossed his arms and raised one hand to run a few fingers over his goatee; though it was plain to see that the man was teasing. "And we just can't have your head exploding. I mean, the hospital would just get upset if I had to bring you back in a bucket." He shrugged his hand out.

Dib gave a small grin at Dwicky's words. Instead of answering, though, he shifted around just so he could get off the couch. Skeets was left behind on the arm as he made his way over to the man. He stopped only when he was a few feet in front of the other, and moved his arms up to pull him down. He moved his tongue out to lick at the rim of Dwicky's ear. The action only took a few seconds before he pulled away just so he could speak against the wet skin. "Please..."

Dwicky's mouth opened and closed, his eyes shifting shut with a pleased noise. His arms slipped around the boy's hips as his hands sneaked under the short bottom of the boy's shirt. "Well, when you put it that way..." He tugged the boy against him as he leaned against the wall. He petered lingering kisses against the side of Dib's neck. "How can I resist?"

Dib gave a small moan at the kisses, happy that he no longer had to quiet himself. "You can't." He gave Dwicky's ear another small lick before he pulled back completely. Just as he pulled back, though, he latched his lips onto the other's for a deep kiss. His tongue darted out to push past the man's lips and teeth. A small muffled moan came from him that he didn't even try to stop.

Dwicky returned the kiss quite happily, thoroughly meeting Dib's tongue with his own. He drew his hands up the boy's back, dragging his shirt up at the same time before he ran them back down. He broke the kiss, but nabbed a few more before he spoke with a wide, smitten grin. "Alright. But you have to slip into something more comfortable." Dwicky squiggled his brows. "One of your new sweatshirts and probably a pair of pants; dress warm, it's been raining. Then I'll grab what we need to go look at your surprise." He pressed an endearing kiss on the boy's lips, after he brushed the stray dark hair from Dib's brow. "Mkay?"

Dib gave a small noise after the kiss. He nodded his head a bit and pulled back his arms. He couldn't help the small smile that pulled at his lips before he spoke. "Alright." With that, he turned around just so he could walk back to the couch and pick up the bag he had been carrying. As soon as he had it in his hands, he hurried down the hall towards the bathroom just so he could change into one of his other new outfits.

Dwicky hummed to himself, rubbing his hands together and with a happy step he went into his room to get what he needed: a tarp and a rolled up blanket. "When you're dressed and out, you can grab us two colas if you want!" he shouted from bedroom as he dug around in his closet.

"Okay!" Dib's voice had been slightly muffled from behind the bathroom door, even as he shouted. It took awhile before the door finally opened. Once he was out, Dib went straight to the kitchen as he was told, so he could rummage through the fridge. His hands toyed with the plastic rings that held each can of cola, trying to free two of them.

"AHA!" Dwicky could be heard in the hall. "I knew the tarp was in the hall closet." There were sounds of rummaging before Dwicky peered into the kitchen near the front door. "As soon as you got the cola, get your shoes on and we'll go."

Dib finally freed two cans and kicked the fridge door closed with his foot. He turned around to head back into the living room to do as he was told, stopping just so he could slip his sneakers back on. Once he was sure they were on well enough, he picked Skeets back up with his free hand and then headed back over to Dwicky. A curious expression came over his face and he couldn't help but speak up. "What kind of surprise is this?"

Dwicky opened the door and let Dib walk out before he followed, locking the door after them. "This way, if you will." He led Dib down the hall, the muffled sounds of televisions and music could be heard. "Remember when we talked a few days ago, about things you would like to do once you were out?" They walked down the hall until they came to a door marked for the stairs. Dwicky pushed it open for Dib with a smile, following after when the boy went through. "Well, this is one of them that we talked about." He led them up the last flight of stairs to another heavier door. "And I think it should be just the right time at night- to see the sky." Pushing the bar to the door, Dwicky opened it with a grunt to reveal the roof of the apartment.

Dib looked up at Dwicky with wide eyes before he actually looked out the opened door. It took him a while to finally step out onto the concrete. Once he did, his eyes immediately went up after just a few steps. They scanned every star and his head twisted each way his eyes couldn't see. He stayed like that for a bit until finally he looked back at Dwicky. His eyes still a little wide. "You remembered." He couldn't stop the wide smile that spread on his face after the words left him.

Dwicky let the door close after him as he walked out on the roof to join Dib. "Of course." He grinned at Dib's reaction. He walked over to the boy, planting a quick kiss on his cheeks, shifting the bundles under one arm so he could take Dib's hand. "Here." He led Dib around the door and they came in to the incline of the roof that covered it. "The rain rolls off this part, so it's not too wet. And it's higher up." Dwicky handed Dib the blanket as he unrolled the tarp and spread it out on the roof, taking meticulous care. Next, he took the blanket and spread it out over the tarp, making sure it was perfectly smooth. "There. After you." He gestured to the blanket.

Dib took no time in walking over and sitting down on the blanket. He set Skeets in his lap while placing his soda in front of him. After he was settled, he looked back at Dwicky. The hand that still held the other can moved out to hand over the other soda to the man.

"Thank you." Dwicky took the can and sat himself down next to Dib. He looked up as he opened his drink. "Looks like the sky rained itself out. It's going to be a nice clear night." He gave the smallest of chuckles. "I was worried it was going to be cloudy."

Dib set his hands on his soda can just so he could toy with the lid for a few seconds. His eyes moved back up to the sky and stayed there after Dwicky's words. "It's strange to be up here and look without any kind of equipment." His fingers finally opened the soda and he kept them still. "It's still just as nice, though. Three years may not seem like a lot, but when you're away from so many things you enjoy, it can come to be a long time."

Dwicky's eyes cast down to look at the top of his can. "Three years is a very long time... especially when you're away from things you care about." He took a swig of cola. "I find time is relevant to how you're spending it. When you're doing something you like, it goes by very quickly. When you're doing something you don't like, it can be painfully slow. I find waiting is the worst of them all… you can feel every ticking second when you're waiting for something." He tapped the side of his can before taking a sip and looking back up.

Dib gave a small sound. He raised his own can and took a large swallow before setting it back down. For a bit, he kept his eyes up while staying silent. It was only a bit longer that he spoke up again. "Have you ever thought about if any of it was actually real? Do you ever wonder what it would have been like if you had actually gone to space that night and those weren't just a bunch of your friends?" He turned his eyes on Dwicky. "Are you ever curious about any of it at all? You did believe in it once, right? Do you ever still think about it?"

Dwicky slowly brought his head and gaze down to look at Dib. He just stared at Dib, blinking wet eyes that could have been a trick of the light in the dark. He looked back at his cola and rubbed his nose, giving a thoughtful sniff after. "No." he answered quietly. "I've got... enough to think about here." He smiled a little, glancing at Dib before he took another drink.

Dib continued to keep his eyes on Dwicky for a few more moments. After a bit, though, he turned around on the blanket just so he could lean back on Dwicky's arm. His head moved back on the man's shoulder so he could continue staring up at the sky. "I guess that makes sense. It probably makes sense not to think about something you don't believe in anymore either. I'm still getting used to that." His eyes closed halfway. "It doesn't hurt as much anymore to say it's not real, though."

Dwicky looked up at the stars, those burning white specks scattered across a dark velvety sky. "It… takes time. But you're doing very well though." He sneaked his hand out on the blanket, sightlessly seeking Dib's hand. His fingers curled over Dib's, easily covering the smaller fingers underneath. "You've done a lot. You deserve to be out." Dwicky softly laughed. "You're a lot saner than most people you see on the street."

"I guess so." Dib turned his hand over under Dwicky's just so he could link their fingers. "At the same time, though, it's hard to believe. I still have to take medication because I hear things. I'm not really all that normal. I'm not really all that insane either. I want to believe I'm normal, but I can't. As much as it feels good to hear it, I know it can't be true." He gave a small sigh while letting his eyes open back up all the way. "I don't know if I deserve any of this." He squeezed Dwicky's hand just a bit.

Dwicky shut his eyes a moment and squeezed Dib's hand back. "You do. Besides," he took their linked hands onto his lap, resting Dib's on his own, he softly stroked the back of the boy's hand with his free hand as he spoke, "being normal is overrated. Really." He looked down at their hands. Dib's skin was so pale under the night's light. With all the time spent indoors, the boy probably sunburned very easy. "If you, me, if we were text book normal people... we wouldn't be here right now. I wouldn't be doing _this_--" Dwicky raised their linked hands and kissed near Dib's knuckles in gesture. He rested their hands on his cheek as he looked at the boy. "And I wouldn't be saying: I love you, Dib." He kissed the boy's forearm, smiling. "In such a cheesy, meaningful fashions, if I was 'normal'."

Dib had looked back at Dwicky at some point, while the man spoke. The last few words had the small smile that had formed on his face growing just a bit more. "Then I guess I'm glad we don't fit such perfect examples of what normal is." He moved his fingers a bit against Dwicky's cheek. "If I would have to give this up just to be completely normal, then I guess I would just have to deal with staying at an asylum my whole life." He gave a small, playful grin.

Dwicky raised his free hand to rub the boy's forearm over the sweatshirt. "I wouldn't do that just yet. The world is always changing, gaining new ideas and points of view. The world frowned on a lot more way back when than they do now." He brought Dib's fingers to his lips, nuzzling them. "Then again, young girls were married off at the age of thirteen way back when." He smiled some. "The world was never sane to begin with. It just... tends to _think_ it's more idealistic."

"Hmm..." Dib turned his head back around so he could look back up. "If I get out, I want to be able to keep seeing you. I want to be able to visit you. I want to be able to go out with you. I want to be able to spend the night over here." He let his eyes fall down to his drink. "I want to be able to do everything we've been doing. It shouldn't have to stop just because I'm better." He brought the can to his lips and took another swallow before going on. "Even if it would all be incredibly hard to make happen. I don't care."

Dwicky's gaze fell on the wet cement of the apartment roofs; they stretched on into the dark, dropping off at nothing. There were no fences, no lock on the roof door, and now he wondered why in this sick, sad world he'd never seen a jumper since he'd been here. Though in the tween of time he was away, he could vaguely recall hearing about one, but it could have been any apartment or building in the city.

"I'll try my damnedest." he murmured against Dib's fingers.

Dib glanced back at Dwicky once again. For a few moments he stayed silent. Finally, he moved around, setting the can he held aside as he did. He took Skeets just so he could turn to his side. With the same hand, he lifted Dwicky's arm up so he could cuddle better against the man. Once he was settled, he let Dwicky's arm drop back down around him. The entire time he let Dwicky keep hold of his other hand. His head pressed against the other and his eyes slipped closed. "That's good enough for me."

Dwicky shifted so Dib was comfortably against him, keeping his arm over the boy. He turned his head so he could smile against Dib's temple, laying a few hidden kisses there. "I love you, ya know." He blinked away the dark hair that hung in his eyes. "I've only really been with you for seven days, counting when I left left... but.." He trailed off. On their linked hands, slowly ran his thumb against the side of Dib's. "I dunno."

Dib gave a small content noise before speaking. "I know. I love you too." He opened his eyes just a bit so he could look out ahead. "I'm sorry for everything I said to you when you came back. For how I acted." He lowered his eyes to the blanket. "For calling you a liar. It was shocking to see you again. Of course, I was scared too, but I just didn't understand."

Dwicky exhaled heavily against Dib's hair, inhaling, he tugged Dib closer, taking him in with his breath. "You don't need to apologize." He shut his eyes for the moment. "For anything."

Dib just barely nodded his head. He gladly leaned closer against Dwicky while closing his eyes once more. He stayed silent after that, content enough to stay pressed against the other. His other hand pulled the plush he held closer to his chest after just a bit, proving he was still alert.

"Here. Let's lay down. You've had a long busy day, hm." Dwicky let go of the boy's hand to lay them down, tugging Dib with him and keeping him close as they lay on the blanket. "You can still look up at the stars. It's probably easier like this." He ran fingers through the fray of dark hair at the back of Dib's head, smoothing against the prickly shaved hair below. "Just... relax."

Dib only gave a small sound of protest before giving in and lying down as well. He just barely opened his eyes to look back up. The touches on the back of his head caused him to want to keep them closed. "I enjoyed everything about today. Well, except for one tiny little part, but that doesn't really matter anymore." He gave a small, tired sound before going on. "It was easy to be around people. It wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. I got used to it after awhile." He smiled just a bit. "And I really like my surprise."

Dwicky's fingers trailed down to the base of Dib's head, stroking up and down the back of the boy's neck. "We can do this every time you come to visit. Every night." He rested his cheek atop the boy's head; his hair was soft, and it smelled like Dib. "And when you get out of there too. Just you, me, the stars… and Skeets." Dwicky gave a lazy chuckle. "He gets V.I.P."

Dib cuddled closer to Dwicky before letting his eyes close once again. "I'd like that." His arm that held Skeets moved a bit so that his hand could grip at Dwicky's shirt. "I'd like to just be with you. Just like this. I don't like hiding. I like being able to say 'I love you' and I like being able to kiss you." He opened his eyes back up just so he could look at Dwicky. "This is nice."

The man smiled lazily down at Dib, leaning his head down to rest it against the other's, touching his lips wherever they landed on the boy's face. "I agree." Dwicky smiled more. "This is very nice."

Dib couldn't help but smile at the kiss to his face. He let his eyes move back up and gave a thoughtful sound before he spoke again. "At least the next time we spend time together we won't have to shop for clothes. Which means we won't have to run from scary clerks." He blinked his eyes. "Unless the next place we go there is a person just as scary that is very eager to sell us gum or something just as stupid." He couldn't help but laugh at the thought.

Dwicky rolled his eyes some and laughed as well. "That'll be something." He snorted. "And if one more person calls me your father-- I swear, I'll just adopt you and call it square." He smirked at the musing. "That would just add another anomaly to our list of deviations." He shook his head, half nuzzling against Dib's. "So, then, is there anything you want to do on your next outing?"

It took Dib a bit to stop laughing from Dwicky's comment. When he quieted though, he stayed silent for a while as he thought about the question. "Well..." A small grin came to his lips and he tried his best to sound innocent as he went on. "We could go to a movie. We don't have to watch it, though." He failed horribly at sounding innocent.

Dwicky couldn't keep the giddy laugh in. His hands sneaked under the boy's sweatshirt, running against the warm skin there, though exposing it to the cool air at the same time. "You need to work on your subtly." He grinned.

Dib let out a quiet noise. A small shiver ran through him because of the sudden cold air, but it didn't make the grin go away. "Either way, it gets me what I want, right? Why should I worry about it?" He let go of Dwicky's shirt just so he could pull the man closer by his collar, so he was able to press a kiss to his lips. He didn't let it last long before he was sucking at his bottom lip.

Any answer Dwicky was about to make was very quickly changed into a pleased moan. He pressed another kiss to Dib's lips, sparing the boy no moment of protest as he deepened the kiss, running his hands higher up Dib's back, almost fully exposing it to the cold night air. But just as quickly, he ran his hands back down the prickling skin.

The moan Dib had tried to let out was quieted by the kiss. He pressed his tongue against Dwicky's own and pushed past. Skeets was forgotten for the moment, just so he could move his arm closer around Dwicky's neck. His hand ran through the man's hair much like he always did. He leaned into the touches to his skin, giving a muffled noise here and there.

Dwicky's fingers dipped below the boy's waistline, brushing over slight curves and boney hips. It was restraint that brought his hands back up to rest on Dib's hips, though haste tugged them closer to himself. Dwicky groaned when he broke the kiss, pressing it again near the corner of the boy's lips. "We have to be care with what you _get_." he spoke breathless against wet lips. "We can't take you back to the hospital all scratched up, or bruised... who knows what they'll think." His brows furrowed so the seriousness would hopefully be relayed.

Dib let out an annoyed sound at the lost contact. Dwicky's words did nothing to help that annoyance leave completely. "We have to be careful there. We have to be careful here. I want to stop being careful." He pressed his lips back against the other's for a quick and needy kiss. His free hand moved behind his back just so he could slip it under Dwicky's shirt. His nails just barely moved along skin before his hand finally settled. He pulled his lips back just so he could speak once again while his eyes met the other's. "Just for a bit."

Dwicky's cheeks warmed over, his skin prickling where it was touched. "I have to be careful with you but-...," he swallowed, "you don't have to be careful with me." He managed a wry grin against Dib's lips, pressing them back against the other's.

Dib responded to the kiss easily. His hand started to move once again along Dwicky's back, just so it could move up under the shirt. After only a few seconds, he pulled Dwicky away from the kiss by his hair. He didn't give the man much time to respond to the small tug though, because he quickly latched his mouth onto Dwicky's neck. His teeth just barely bit down on skin as his tongue licked.

Dwicky blinked, dazed at being yanked away, not wholly expecting it, but just as quickly, he let out a husky moan at Dib's actions. He leaned his head away, exposing more neck. He buried his face against the boy's shoulder for the moment, tugging the boy just that much closer by the belt loops of his pants; though he squished Skeets between them in the process.

Dib gave a small noise against Dwicky's neck at being pulled closer. He scratched at the man's skin just a bit before just barely gripping with fingers. He shifted around a bit, just so he could try his best to toe a sneaker off. The harsh action caused it to land near the edge of the roof. Of course, in that moment Dib couldn't have cared less if the shoe had fallen off and knocked someone unconscious down below. As soon as it was off, he moved his foot up a bit so he could run it along Dwicky's leg, the whole time his mouth still kissed at the man's neck.

It was so very hard to keep things clothed, and Dwicky groaned to himself that fate really was a mean bastard for this; and had a cruel sense of humor, especially for the bent out of shape morality he was given. He ran a hand down from Dib's hip, along the bent leg that followed. He gripped the fabric of the jeans before running his hand back up to Dib's rear, tugging and pressing closer at the same time.

Dib couldn't stop the moan that came from him, even if he tried. He let his hand drop away from Dwicky's hair just so it could land around the back of the man's neck. His mouth continued to move up, causing him to shift against Dwicky's body until he took the man's ear in his mouth and started to suck on it. While he was occupied with that, his foot moved just a bit so it could wrap around Dwicky's leg, trying to keep the other where he was.

"Wow." Dwicky mused breathlessly with a completely dazed mind. "You _are_ a fast learner." His eyes shifted closed and his hands went back to slinking under the boy's sweatshirt, grazing nails enough to be felt, but not enough to leave any mark. He dipped his head to kiss what he could of the boy's exposed shoulder through his shirt's collar, muffling a throaty moan every now and again.

A small shudder went through Dib's body because of Dwicky's nails. "Told you so." The words had been whispered against the wet rim of Dwicky's ear right before Dib attacked it once again. His actions caused his small noises to be muffled, but he didn't plan to stop. The hand on Dwicky's back used nails to run back down skin 'til they stopped at the other's pants, dipping down just barely.

Dwicky's back arched at the nails as he took in air with a slight gasp. "Wow. Nails." He murmured as he melted back down against Dib. His hand motions grew lazy and slowed as Dib continued to suck on his ear. The reverberation of muffled whines Dib made against it causing him to shiver as elation prickled down his spine. He couldn't stand just laying there while a perfectly delicious teenager sucked on his ear. Dwicky tugged his ear free, pressing Dib onto his back as he followed, pushing himself up on his other arm. "Mkay- kissing you now." He ordered with a grin as he firmly pressed his lips to Dib's.

The small laugh Dib gave in response was muffled by Dwicky's lips. He pressed back into the kiss, while at the same time trying to press closer against the body on top of him. His glasses pressed up his face a bit because of the kiss, but he didn't really seem to mind much.  
It was only after a few seconds that Dib felt something hit the side of his face. He ignored it though, considering the situation. It wasn't until drop after drop started to fall down did he finally pull away from the kiss. His eyes moved up away from Dwicky just to catch small drops hitting his glasses. The sky no longer full of stars. He kept his eyes up if only for a few seconds before he looked back at Dwicky and pulled the man down for another kiss.

Dwicky gave a grinning laugh against Dib's lips. Dib's glasses were cool and wet against his face and for a playful pause, he pulled away to pluck them off the boy's face, clicking it closed to set aside before slamming his lips against Dib's lips. The droplets plipped coldly on flushed skin, causing Dwicky to shiver and slink closer overtop of the warm body below. All around came the audible patter of rain, splashing puddles already left on the roof top. It fell harder, soaking into the blanket, clothes, and dark hair alike.

Dib blinked his eyes at suddenly no longer having his glasses. The kiss caused him to let the worry slip his mind and respond eagerly instead. Both of his hands moved to run through Dwicky's hair, which was getting wetter by the second. His hands, which had been at least a bit dry, became soaked with the action, but he refused to pull them away. The sweatshirt he wore became wetter and wetter, which only caused him to cling more and more to the body above him.

Dwicky's white office shirt became drenched, sticking to his back more clingily than the boy below him. He tried to stay above Dib to keep the rain off him, but that idea fell through when all he could feel against his fingertips was hot, wet skin. He moaned, almost drowned out from the fall of rain, drawing back just enough to lick away a drop of water that rolled down the boy's cheek. "..We're going to catch a cold." Dwicky muttered with slight concern against wet skin, not following any of his advice as he dipped his head, kissing at the still dry skin at the crook of Dib's neck. He tugged up the bottom of the boy's sweatshirt, baring the boy's middle slightly to the rain, he wanted to tug the useless, wet piece of clothing off; he must have been insane.

The sudden feel of cool air and rain on his flushed skin had Dib letting out a low moan. He leaned his head down just so he could lick small drops off Dwicky's shoulder. The wet shirt moved aside easily for him in the process. "I don't care." The words were barely said and, considering the rain, may not have been heard.

Dwicky paused a moment, catching his breath, blinking away droplets of water from his eyes to look down at Dib. He gave a slightly crooked grin, brushing back the dark hair that plastered itself to his own forehead. "A little water..," he grinned more, shifting to sit back on his knees ",can't hurt, right?" He glanced down at his white shirt turned transparent, clinging to his skin. Not even bothering with buttons, Dwicky crossed arms grabbing the bottom of his shirt and pulled the shirt up, peeling it off wet skin, pulling it off and tossed it onto the wet blanket. "Maybe it can." He laughed. "_Cold_!"

Dib had let his arms fall back down when Dwicky moved up. A small blush formed on his face as the man removed his shirt, but he easily got over it. Instead of pulling Dwicky back down, Dib sat up so he was a little level with the other. He pressed their lips together again and ran his hands along the man's sides. It didn't take him long to pull back, though. His hands fell down to his own shirt, just so he could lift it up and toss the wet piece of clothing aside as well. He gave a small grin after and leaned in once more. His lips were just barely pressed against Dwicky's as he spoke. "It's not bad."

Dwicky had to grin against the boy's lips, brushing fingers against Dib's wet cheeks, down shoulders and chest, across boney ribs to the boy's back, and tugged him closer. It felt so good to see, to touch the real skin that had been under that jacket, to slide hands across the slick pale flesh. It felt wonderful barraging skin against skin as he had Dib so close. "It isn't." He agreed full heartedly as he kissed Dib's lips, flicking his tongue out to catch a few wet drops that trickled there. He then dipped his head to run his tongue against the boy's pale shoulder, kissing the prickling skin as he ran his hands up the boy's wet spine.

Dib let out a small, humming sound at the touches and the licks. He leaned his head to the side a bit just to let Dwicky have at more. His own hands trailed down until they stopped at the other's waist. Not once did he use his nails. Instead, he let his fingers slide over the wetness that was on Dwicky's skin. After just a few minutes, he pulled back away from the other's lips just so he could have his turn. He moved his tongue out so he could trail it past Dwicky's lips and past his goatee, down his chin, and only stopping just so he could suck at his throat. His lips latched on near his Adam's apple.

Dwicky shut his eyes, indulging the sensations as he ran his fingers through the boy's wet hair. He smoothed the dark hair back, burying his fingers there, running them along Dib's scalp. He lightly nibbled the usually bouncy lock of hair on the boy's head, now slicked down from the rain. There he pressed a few kisses, murmuring sweet little things that were most likely muffled by the boy's hair and drowned out by the rain.

Dib licked at the wet skin under his mouth for a few more seconds and finally turned his head afterwards just so he could bury it under Dwicky's chin. The hold he still had around the other tightened just a bit. Although it was raining much too hard for any sane person to be out, he was easily content to stay like that. He didn't really feel that cold anyway.

Dwicky held the boy tightly, keeping as they were, rubbing the boy's back to keep him warm, warm against him. He swallowed, watching past the rain, though not at anything in particular. He turned his head to rest a cheek atop Dib's head.

Dib's eyes stayed open for a long while. The touch to his back relaxed him and caused his body to go somewhat limp. After a bit, his eyes became focused on his shoe that was still near the edge. He gave it his full attention as if just realizing it was off his foot, but gave in and closed his eyes with a small sound, the whole day and sudden situation making him drowsy.

Dwicky slightly rocked the boy against him, running fingers through his soaked hair. He whispered small things near his ear; _it's alright, you can go to sleep, _and_ I'll take care of everything. I'll take care of you_. He sighed contently atop the boy's head, his hand falling back down to rub his wet back. "I love you... You'll be okay." He murmured on.

The words soothed Dib. His worries of actually falling asleep left him for the moment and instead, he slowly started to give in. It didn't take long after that for his grip to loosen up and go slack. His breath was slow and even, difficult to hear because of the rain.


	15. Sessions 15

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox **  
**Rating ** PG 13  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** Lint

Chapter 15

Warm. Comfortable; but incredibly stiff. These were the first things that flooded Dwicky's senses when his mind filtered itself into the waking world.

He took in a large, lazy breath through his mouth, finding his nose was only good for sniffles at the moment. With languid motion, Dwicky stretched the stiff out of his arms, his joints cracking in complaint, but he gave a satisfied sound anyway; _I'm such an old man._ He brought his arms back, hugging warmly the small body in front of him. The texture of the amusing ladybug pajamas only made Dib just that much more cuddle-worth. With a happy, groggy mumble, Dwicky landed a few kisses on the back of Dib's neck before nuzzling his face against it. It didn't have to be morning just yet.

The kisses caused only the smallest sounds to come from Dib in his sleep. The plush that had been caught in the rain was now hugged closely to his chest. The small disturbance caused him to hold it tighter before eventually nuzzling his face again it. His mouth just barely chomped down on it before he was settled. No other movements were made except for a tiny curl of his foot as it stretched.

Dwicky let himself drift off a little longer, in that cozy place between awake and asleep. He listened to the slow, easy breath of the other, completely lulled by the sound. It meant that Dib was peacefully asleep, no voices, no worries, no nightmares; all without the help of sleeping pills.It had Dwicky absolutely still for a moment, holding Dib with crossed arms. He then curled around the small body possessively. He didn't want to get up, _ever_. 'It's not fair' as Dib would put it, that this wouldn't happen every morning. Maybe every other morning, a weekend or two, but wasn't 'everyday'.

Dwicky pushed the malcontent feelings away in favor of snuggling closer to Dib. He managed to move a hand, groping for the edge of blankets with as much minimal effort as possible, and pulled them higher, denying the light of morning. Dib continued to stay asleep long after the blanket was pulled closer. If anything, the extra bit of comfort caused him to move closer to Dwicky.

There was a nagging that caused Dib to slowly come to. It didn't really help that after awhile ,the soft taste in his mouth was really starting to get to him. It took him a bit to actually open his eyes. The first few minutes he squirmed, as if that would help him claim sleep again. Once he was coherent enough, he glanced ahead through groggy eyes. "Wha..?"

A lazy hand rubbed along Dib's arm, meaning to warm and assuage. "Morning." came the sleeply reply against the back of the boy's neck.

The word made Dib blink, and the touch on his arm caused him to finally relax. He settled back down,closing his eyes so they were barely open. "Morning." The word came out as more of a whisper than an actual reply. He stayed silent afterwards, more than happy to stay cuddled in Dwicky's arms, and maybe even fall back to sleep. Although one thing stopped him in the end, and it left him confused. "I thought we were outside?"

Dwicky shook his head, nuzzling the back of Dib's neck. "You fell asleep. I brought everything back in." His words were half mumbled against skin.

"I fell asleep." The words shocked Dib for a few seconds as he echoed them. It took him a bit to finally relax again as a small noise escaped him. He stayed quiet after. One of his hands moved away from Skeets so it could move down under the blanket and lay on top of Dwicky's own. His finger just barely traced on the skin, much like it did in the restaurant, the patterns not really adding up to much since his mind was still foggy.

Dwicky slowly grinned against skin. "Like a log.. Except, you're much lighter than a log. You slept very soundly when I brought everything in." He placed a small kiss where his lips rested.

"Just like when you stayed the night at the asylum." The words were spoken mostly to Dib himself, since they were so low. He continued to move his fingers for a bit longer, until he finally stopped so he could grip Dwicky's hand. He moved around a bit so he could touch his foot to the man's leg, wanting to be as close as he could. As he moved, he realized something. "I'm not wearing my jeans from last night."

Dwicky made a thoughtful sound, sniffling a wet nose. "Mm.. I helped you change." He gave a soft chuckle, running his fingers over Dib's before he held the boy's hand as well. "Didn't think you wanted to sleep in soaked clothing. We've probably already got colds. Or, at least I do." He mused.

Dib blushed at that bit of information before he shrugged it off. He turned his head so that he could glance at Dwicky out the corner of his eyes. "Sorry about that. I didn't want you to get sick. I guess we should have went back inside once it started raining."

"Nah. It's because I had to go back to get everything. I leave no man behind." Dwicky chuckled. "Like finding your lost shoe." He shifted so he could rest his chin on Dib's shoulder, nuzzling the other's cheek and planting a groggy kiss there. "As long as you don't have a cold, then it doesn't matter."

A small smile formed on Dib's face at the kiss. "I feel fine." He let his eyes close all the way once again, but kept as he was. A small content sigh escaped his lips after a few moments and he spoke up again. "I like being able to wake up like this. I wish I could feel this relaxed every morning." He opened his eyes back up just a bit. "I wish you could be with me every morning."

"To wake up next to fuzzy pink pajamas with little, itty bitty, lady bugs," Dwicky nuzzled a kiss into Dib's shoulder, "I would give anything." He hugged Dib closer, not letting go of the boy's hand. "But it's the Dib in them that I'd love to be waking up next to." With a warm sigh, he buried his face into the crook of the boy's neck. "Mmph. Just like this."

The blush that had been on Dib's cheeks earlier came back. The breath on his neck caused him to give a small sigh of his own before he closed his eyes again. "I wish permission to take me out meant that you could actually keep me out." He moved his foot lightly up Dwicky's a bit, only stopping to curl his toes. "I wouldn't mind staying here all the time and calling it home."

Dwicky nodded against Dib. "We're working on keeping you out. In time, it'll happen." He nosed the boy's neck. "My home is your home." He laid a few kisses behind the boy's ear, smiling against it. "And you're always welcome to call it that."

Dib gave a tiny sound at the kisses. He turned his head just a bit so he could nuzzle Dwicky's hair in return. He laid a small kiss on the man's head before speaking up again, pulling away just enough so his words weren't mumbled. "Is it wrong of me to think of this as more of a home than my real one? For me to want to stay here more than I do my real home?" His voice lowered a bit, as if hoping Dwicky couldn't hear him. "Is it wrong of me to never want to leave you?"

Dwicky went silent, unsure how to really answer questions like that. It was touching. He rested his mouth on the boy's shoulder a moment before lifting it so he could be heard "I'm sure your family misses you. You just have to give them a chance." He made a small content noise, happy to be exactly where he was. "But, you know you're always welcome here, always; just like another home."

Dib just barely nodded his head instead of answering. He nuzzled his face against Dwicky's head and laid there for a few minutes longer. "What would have happened if my dad didn't let you help me?" The question was muttered quietly and Dib had to move his head to make sure he could be heard. "If you never came to the asylum? Do you think I would still be in that same room, just as scared as before?"

Dwicky hadn't expected that question, and it had him moving Dib to lay on his back so he could rest a chin on the boy's chest to look up at him. "Why do you ask?" He kept his hands at Dib's sides, fiddling at the fabric and peeking skin.

The sudden movement caused Dib to let out a noise, but he gave no real protest. He moved the hand that was now free up to run through Dwicky's hair. He only stopped to fiddle with the few strands that fell near the man's forehead. "I just wonder if I would have ever been this okay without you. I'm scared to think that maybe if you had never showed up, I would have been stuck in there my whole life." He turned his attention to Dwicky's face. "You're the only person that hasn't really forgotten me."

Dwicky's eyes shifted half shut, subdued by Dib's actions. "I don't know.." he quietly answered "Can't say for sure. I find, anything can happen now-a-days." He turned his head to press a small kiss to the hand at his forehead. "I wouldn't worry about what has happened, focus on what you can do." He smiled, though still groggy and it came out crooked. "You'll meet new people who will remember you. I'm sure. New, and good friends. And you'll forget all about the hospital."

Dib's hand twitched at the small bit of contact, but after, he immediately went back to toying with Dwicky's hair. "It's hard to believe I'm going to be able to do so much. To go from being focused on one thing to actually having a life. I'm sure I can do it, though." His hand moved away from Dwicky's hair and instead moved down so he could toy with the man's earring. "I want to do it. Everything we talked about."

Dwicky let his eyes finally shift shut all the way. "Mmmmhm." he murmured compliantly.

Dib took his hand back and blinked his eyes at the answer. For a few seconds he just stared at the other until a small grin came to his face. He let his hand move down away from Dwicky's ear so it could travel down the man's side, just barely tickling. "You're falling asleep."

Dwicky rested his head down so he could nuzzle a cheek against the soft material of ladybug print. "M-m." he denied, trying to ignore the tickling. "No 'm not."

"Really? I think you are." Dib continued to run his hand along Dwicky's side. After a few seconds, he lightly scratched nails along the skin, just so he could get more of a reaction out of the other. His other hand let go of Skeets so it could attack Dwicky's other side.

"Nails." The man made a pathetic sounding protest as he tried to move from the touch, but the same thing was happening to his other side. "I'm awake. I'm awake." Dwicky huffed as he grasped the boy's hands to tug them away from his sides. Of course, after, he stayed as he was, quite comfortable.

Dib gave a small whine as his fun was ruined. He tried to free his hands, but gave in after only a few small struggles. He let out a sigh which just barely moved Dwicky, if at all, and afterwards, all he could do was pout. "No fair..."

Dwicky made a happy noise that he'd won, happy to stay as he was. Of course, he had to get up sometime soon; make them breakfast, give Dib his morning medication and...-eventually take him back. Dwicky turned his head so he could bury his face in Dib's thin chest. "Mmmph. What time is it?"

Dib had relaxed some and started to close his eyes. Dwicky's question startled him into opening them back up. First, his gaze moved down to the other. "Time?" He turned his attention away just so he could move his eyes around the room. After a quick second they landed on a clock that sat on a table by the bed. The red numbers stared back at him and he easily spoke them out loud. "Ten twenty-seven." Happy that he had given the information the other wanted, Dib laid his head back down and closed his eyes once more.

"Mmm. Damn. Maybe just.. ten more minutes?" Dwicky let go of the other's hands in favor of hugging them at Dib's sides comfortably. "I'll take you back at around noon. That'll give us time to have brunch and get ready to go.. Maybe clear out a drawer 'n a place in my closet to hang your new clothes up."

Dib tensed up a bit under Dwicky. It took a while before he had relaxed as he was before. His eyes barely opened as he spoke up again. "When we have to leave, do I have to put the jacket back on?" His fingers tightened a bit. "It's been so nice having it off. Could I wait till we actually get to the asylum?"

Dwicky didn't' immediately speak after the question. He opened his eyes just a little to stare at nothing in particular. He then pushed himself on his arms to slink up beside Dib, tugging the boy into his arms securely. "Sure, kiddo, we can do that."

Dib easily cuddled against Dwicky, while at the same time, happy with the answer he got. His hands eased up just so he could move them and wrap them both around Dwicky. He buried his face against the man's chest, completely content in that moment, not even caring that soon he would have to leave. Not really thinking about it.

---

Dwicky groggily drew his eyes back open, the blur around turning clearer with each blink. That's when it hit him, smacked him clear across the face: it was twelve fifteen! He bolted up sitting, Dib, blankets and all. "We slept-in two hours!" He thoroughly rubbed his face, dragging fingers through his hair. "Damnit."

A startled, yet groggy noise left the body that still clung to Dwicky. Arms barely tightened as Dib looked up at the man with half opened eyes. Half his body was still lying down on the bed, the other half wrapped around Dwicky's waist. "So what? Go back to sleep..." He gave an annoyed sound before burying his face once more against the other's skin.

"I can't. It's already noon-- and we're suppose to be pretty damn ready by now." Dwicky crawled out of bed with Dib still clinging onto him. "I still have to give you your medication." He slapped his forehead and stumbled out of the bedroom with Dib on him. "Where did I leave the bag. Bag, bag, bag, bag." He made cat calls, as if that would make the desired object come running. "Heeere baggy, baggy, bag. Come to Mister Dwicky."

Dib gave another annoyed sound before he finally dislodged himself from Dwicky. All the running around the other was doing only caused him to stumble and lose his footing. Once he was free, he moved a hand up to rub at his eyes, wishing he had his glasses so he could see better. "You left it in the living room by the couch before we went out yesterday." He let out a small yawn.

"Right!" Dwicky went to said location and made a happy squee when he found it. "Got it!" He dug around and brought forth the package of pills. He took Dib's hand and dumped what needed to be taken into his palm. "Now we get you a drink." Dwicky ushered the boy into the kitchen and poured him a glass of juice, promptly placing it in the still sleepy boy's hand. "Take that, take a shower, and then get dressed. And, um, I'll.." He ran a hand through his hair. "I'll um.. I'll..-" He stared, blanking out.

Dib swallowed the pills with no hesitation. He kept his eyes on Dwicky for a few moments after he was done drinking half his juice. Finally, he set the glass aside and walked over to the other, pulling him down for a quick kiss before he spoke. "You can either fix us something quick to eat, or get dressed." He pulled back, giving Dwicky a small smile before picking his glass back up. Once it was in his hands, he handed it over to Dwicky. "Here, you have the cold. You drink the rest." With that, he made his way down the hall towards the bathroom, giving a loud yawn in the process before speaking up again. "And I thought you were supposed to be the adult." He closed the door behind him with a small laugh.

Dwicky pointed a finger with the glass in hand and opened his mouth. He blinked and closed his mouth with a click. "He's got a point there." He shrugged and downed the rest of the juice. "You shouldn't kiss people who have colds!" Dwicky finally shouted back, as he decided making brunch, or lunch in this case, was the best of two suggestions. He settled on making burgers, not awake enough to make anything incredibly fancy; lettuce, tomato, onions, cheese, condiments all set out nicely on the counter to be fixed into a burger.

It took Dib a long while to finally come back out. The door to the bathroom was opened just so he could go into the bedroom to get dressed and find his glasses as well. After that, he made his way back into the kitchen wearing a pair of jeans and a red hoodie. Skeets was tucked under one of his arms and he soon set the plush down on the counter so he could look over what was set out. "So, you really can cook." He turned his attention to Dwicky with a small teasing grin on his face. "And here I thought those were just words you were saying to impress me."

Dwicky grinned as he set the frying pan down just long enough to lean over and steal a quick kiss from Dib's lips. "I'm not just a pretty face you know." He turned the burger over on the pan. "Not only do I have a steady job, I can _cook_ too. I'm a modern day housewife." He chuckled and looked back over to Dib. "Impressed yet? Because I'm just oozing talent to win over hearts of handsome young men like yourself." Dwicky squiggled his thick brows as he set a burger on a bun for him.

Dib couldn't help but let out a small laugh at that. "I'm very impressed." He started picking at what was laid out on the counter to place on his burger, bypassing the onions and mustard. "Should I be worried, though? I mean, what if all those other handsome young men see your talent and want you?" He couldn't help but grin, failing at the serious act. "So many other boys I'd have to scare away, and I seem to be good at that." He picked up the burger and took a bite out of it.

Dwicky chuckled as he added things to his own burger. "Well, I'll just have to tell them I've already found myself the most handsome-est of them all. None can live up to this one. This one is extra special." He sidled over to Dib, leaning over and taking the other's chin to steal a longer kiss. After, he leaned back, and licked his lips. "Mm. Tooth paste and ketchup. My favorite flavor combo." he teased with a grin before he went back to put the top bun on his burger for completion.

Dib took another bite of his burger after the kiss before setting it back down. The ketchup left on the side of his mouth he easily wiped off with his fingers and licked off one by one. "You're such a sweet talker. Though, I can't say that's a bad thing." He turned his attention back to Dwicky and gave a small smile. "Whatever happened to not kissing someone that has a cold?"

Dwicky paused as he bit into the burger. He looked up at the ceiling as he chewed. "Ehhh." He shrugged it off guiltily. With a swallow, he chuckled. "Alright. Have it your way." He gave a wet sniffle and rubbed his nose. "No more for you. I can't have you going back with a head cold." he teased as he bit into his burger again.

Dib gave a small grin and just after Dwicky swallowed, he leaned in to give the man a kiss of his own. "I think I'll take my chances." He spoke the words as he pulled back. His hand moved down to poke at his burger before he picked it up once more. "It's too hard for me to stay away from you longer than even two seconds. I think I can deal with the consequences of a cold." A smile came to his face before he bit into his burger again.

Dwicky suddenly sneezed, sniffling after. "Hmm. I didn't think you were the kind of boy who liked nasal drip in your men. Heh. Though this one feels like a killer. I sense aches, congestion, sore throat." He cleared his throat and set his burger down to dust his hands off. "I think this might be fairly lethal. I may have to quarantine myself. Cut off the kisses until I can breathe through my nose." He grabbed some cups and poured them some juice. "As cute as the mental image is, I don't want you sneezing every few minutes when we have a session." He handed a cup to Dib.

Dib took the cup after he set his burger back down while the smile faded from his face. A worried expression replaced it and he kept his eyes on Dwicky. "That's not funny." His eyes fell down to the cup in his hands and the juice inside of it. "What if they won't let you see me just because you're sick?" His hands clenched around the plastic. "What if you just can't see me at all because you're too sick to go out? It's all my fault in the first place you're even sick."

Dwicky blinked over his cup as he drank. He quickly set it down and walked over to Dib. He smoothed either hand over the boy's cheeks and rested his forehead atop Dib's head. "I was only teasing. I'm not that sick. It's just a few sniffles, nothing life threatening. I'll just drink a lot of orange juice, chicken soup and I'll be fine." He kissed Dib's brow to assure him. "I'll be there. Alright? Not even the flu could keep me away."

Dib's hands eased up on the cup at the touches and kiss. "Alright." The word came out quiet and made it obvious he was still upset. "I still feel bad though. Everything you did for me yesterday and all you get out of it is a cold." He raised his cup just so he could take a small swallow of his juice before continuing. "It doesn't seem like a very fair trade."

Dwicky made a small, amused noise as he slipped his arms around Dib's shoulders, resting his mouth and nose on the boy's hair. "I got to spend a wonderful time with you. Plus, I got you wet and topless. That's far worth getting a cold over." He grinned against the boy's hair, placing a kiss there. "Had I the opportunity, I'd do it again." he quietly murmured, his grin growing playfully wider.

Dib fidgeted with the rim of his cup for a few seconds. No matter how open or playful he could get, he still became embarrassed at just the simplest words. "It wasn't exactly like my dream, but I'm definitely not complaining." He raised his eyes back up after he spoke and gave a small smirk. "I enjoyed everything. Too bad I had to fall asleep."

Dwicky chuckled, letting go of Dib (though not without a kiss to his smirk) so he could finish eating his burger. "I'm sure I've given you new things to dream of now, hm?" He gave a slight smirk of his own.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky for a few more minutes before his smirk grew to a grin. "Plenty." He set his cup down on the counter so he could chew on the rest of his burger. After only a couple of bites, he spoke up again, having to swallow a bit just so he could. "Are you going to be staying when we get there? You're not just gonna drop me off are you?"

Dwicky swallowed what he was chewing, picking up his cup. "Did you want to have a session today?" He poised his cup to look at the liquid inside, moving it so it swished around. "I wasn't sure, considering you did a lot yesterday. So much excitement, I didn't know if you had the energy to go over anything." He took a sip and then looked to Dib. "Considering just how much we slept in. But, if you want me to, I can."

"Seems weird thinking about it now." Dib blinked his eyes and gave a quick glance back at Dwicky. "I mean, the fact you would just be helping me as my counselor." He looked back down at what was left of his burger and easily popped the small bite into his mouth. It took a few moments, but he was finally able to speak again after taking a sip from his cup. "After yesterday, things just seem so different. Not that it didn't a few days ago, I guess." He gave a small shrug. "Of course I would want you to stay and help me, though. I told you, I don't want you to leave and I meant it."

With a decided sigh, Dwicky leaned against the counter, rubbing the corners of his lips with a thoughtful motion after he knew there was no ketchup there. He twirled the cup in his hand and then took a sip. "Well, I am here to help you through this. And, like I said before, I'd do anything." He managed a slight optimistic smile. "When you get out, you won't need me anymore like that. We can be just like we are now, happy, casual talking people." He chuckled. "Who eat burgers for breakfast." He stuffed the rest of his burger in his mouth, chasing it with a gulp of juice.

Dib turned his eyes back to Dwicky and couldn't help the grin that came over his face. He left his place at the counter so he could walk back over to the other and wrap his arms around the man's waist from the side. Not being able to lay his head on Dwicky's shoulder, he easily laid it on the side of his arm instead. "Or instead of talking we could do other things." His hands moved up along the man's side. "You wouldn't really have to worry about being careful with me anymore. I would be out taking care of myself."

Dwicky's brows rose instantly as he was quite taken with Dib's words. "Really?" His free arm snaked around the boy's waist. "Taking care of yourself?" he perked with suggestive interest. "_All_ by yourself? Or," he leaned his head down closer to Dib, "do I still get to help?"

"Hmm..." Dib made a small, thoughtful noise in the back of his throat. He didn't answer the other right away. Instead, he moved his arms up just so he could take advantage of Dwicky's sudden closeness. Both arms snaked up around the man's neck so he could pull his head down a bit more and take the man's ear between his teeth. He nibbled at it for a few seconds before he licked at the rim, only stopping so he could just barely speak. "Only if you promise to be rough." He pulled back with a grin and looked the other in the face.

A small husky note left Dwicky as he leapt his arms at Dib's waist. He blinked opened his eyes lazily. "I'll definitely keep the restraint to a minimal." His grin was far from innocent. "The temptation is already there." He bridged the small gap between them to lap at Dib's lips, speaking there. "I assure you." He couldn't help the chuckle.

Dib gave a small sound of his own before he pressed his lips against Dwicky's for a quick kiss. He pulled back just as quickly to speak, keeping the same distance that had been between them before. "Then the sooner I'm out, the better, hmm? Although it is just as fun to try and tempt you. I have to admit." He grinned against Dwicky's lips before pressing another kiss there. One of his hands moved up so it could run through the man's hair, finding more enjoyment in the action each time.

Dwicky returned the kiss with a mock disgruntled sound. He parted their lips just to speak "It isn't nice to tempt. Because eventually, I'll just give in- and then we're both in trouble." His sad frown wasn't very convincing at all, though it didn't matter as he dipped his head to attack Dib's neck with his lips, biting a little harder than he should against the soft pale skin.

Dib wasn't expecting the sudden rough treatment, so it had him tensing up, but only for a few quick seconds. He easily gave in to Dwicky's mouth while giving out a small moan. His hand pushed a bit at the man's head, wanting him to continue. His end of the conversation seemed to be over for the moment.

Dwicky ran his tongue across the bitten skin, grazing teeth along the crook of the other's neck, only to bite on the softer part. He knew he shouldn't, but each bite was more addicting than the next; it was the noises he got from Dib that urged him on. He latched his mouth near the soft skin of neck below the boy's ear. He dragged his fingers up Dib's back, knowing the sweater would cushion any marks, leaving no tracks to follow.

Dib only continued to get louder. His free hand, around Dwicky's waist, moved up so he could scratch at skin. He knew Dwicky wasn't too fond of his nails, but at that moment, his mind wasn't really there. At some point he even moved his head a bit so the other could bite at more of his skin.

Dwicky's moan was muffled against skin. The slight pain causing his mind to come down a little and his eyes quickly flicked to the clock that was on the microwave. He pulled from Dib's neck to gawk with vast disappointment. "Damnit. Damnit! We need to get going." He frowned at the red marks he'd made, obvious on such white skin. "Damnit. What am I doing? Just minutes before we have to leave!"

Dib gave a low whine at the lost contact. His hand continued to move up Dwicky's side until it wrapped around the man's neck so he could pull him back down. He took no time in leaning forward to lick at the gold stud in Dwicky's ear, paying special attention to it. Licking turned to sucking in just a matter of seconds until Dib barely pulled his lips away and trailed tiny kisses down the man's neck, words spoken between each one. "Don't...stop..."

Dwicky's eyes fluttered shut and he gripped the fabric of Dib's hoodie. As much as he would have liked to yank the sweatshirt off and push Dib up against the fridge and then have his way the boy right on the kitchen table he couldn't; _damn you good sense!_

"I would love to be seduced by you right now, but we do have to go." Dwicky wished his voice didn't sound so weak; he was becoming such a push over. "It's past two. The hospital is going to think I stole you." Oh, he did want to steal Dib; so very, very badly. Right now. That very second. "I need to get you back on time, so I can take you out again." He dragged his fingers through Dib's hair; _that's coaxing, that's bad_. Dwicky made a disappointed noise at himself.

Dib only gave a small sound in response. He continued to move his lips down the man's neck, until he got to his shoulder where he finally stopped and pulled away. He ran his hand up through Dwicky's hair, and once he got to the front, he flicked the small strands that hung down while giving the other a lazy smile. "Fine, have it your way. I don't think they would miss me much though." He pulled his hands away completely and let them fall to his sides. "Too bad. I was having fun."

Dwicky gave the other a wry look, raising a hand to fiddle with his earring, wiping the saliva from it. His skin still prickled. "I'm sure you were." He rubbed his neck as he pushed from the counter. "But I said, I'd have you back at noon." He sighed, scratching through his hair as he walked into the bathroom.

Giving half a yawn to stretch his jaw, Dwicky loaded his toothbrush with toothpaste. Just as he was scrubbing, he noted himself in the mirror. He paused and tilted his head and poked at his neck. He gave a loud 'ha'. He took the brush from his mouth to shout in rogue amusement "You brat, you gave me a hickey!" Dwicky paused to examine his neck in the mirror more. He gave another slight laugh. "Several!"

As soon as Dwicky left, Dib moved out of the kitchen so he could start looking around for his shoes. Having fallen asleep last night didn't really allow him to see where Dwicky hid them, so instead, he decided the best choice would be to search for them on his own. Dwicky's voice startled him and he looked up from searching under the couch. "Well, I recall you saying something last night to me. What was it?" He stood up from the floor and tried his best to right his glasses, still speaking loud enough for the other to hear. "You have to be careful with me, but I don't have to be careful with you. Was that it? Am I close?" It was hard for him to keep the teasing tone out of his voice.

It was easy to hear the amused but dismissing snort that Dwicky made in the bathroom before going on to brush his teeth. It was after he was done that he shouted again from in the bathroom "I'm going to have to wear my collar higher up to cover these. Which is going to look i _almost_ /i ridiculous." Dwicky walked out from the bathroom to find Dib still looking around. He smirked some and pointed. "Your shoes are at the door. I had to give them a quick spin in the dryer, because _someone_ likes to play in the rain." Dwicky rubbed the back of his neck as he turned, heading to the bedroom to get changed. "I'm probably covered in scratches, too." he mused as he went.

Dib immediately looked over to the door to see if his shoes were actually there. When his eyes fell on them, he gave a small squeal that really shouldn't have come from a fourteen year old boy's mouth. He walked over to the sneakers and sat down by the door to put them on. His voice was loud as he shouted back at Dwicky "You just won't admit you like it when I do that!"

The man peered from the bedroom door with a catty expression. "Which? The biting, the hickeys or the scratching?" His grin grew just that much more suggestive. "Maybe we should just give your nails a cut before we go, hm? Declaw the cat, so to speak." He chuckled with slight deviousness.

Dib stood up from his place at the door with his shoes on and tied. He made his way back to the kitchen and only stopped for a few seconds to grin back at Dwicky as he answered. "That wouldn't be any fun. I like being able to mark you up." He walked the rest of the way to the kitchen just so he could pick Skeets back up, having left the plush on the counter. "Unless you really like the biting and the hickeys much more."

"They break off about even." Dwicky finally emerged from the bedroom, tying his horribly rumpled tie as he joined Dib in the kitchen. He frowned at the black piece of fabric as he tried to smooth it down to no real avail. "Though I'm sure I'll like it much better when I'm the one doing it to you." His grin returned as he nabbed his juice, downing the rest of it.

Dib looked over at Dwicky at the last words he said and a small blush formed on his cheeks. He couldn't help but grin though. "I'm sure I will too." He picked up his own cup, which still had quite a bit and drank what he could before pouring it out. He set it in the sink and turned his attention back to Dwicky, looking the other over for a few second before he tilted his head. "It's weird. I mean, how much you haven't changed." He shrugged his shoulders and gave a small smile. "It's probably just the clothes or my mind is going because of the pills."

Dwicky laughed. He reached over and ruffled Dib's hair, running his fingers through the scythe lock on top as he took his hand back. "That's as good a hint that I need to go shopping as any." He set his cup down and ushered Dib out to the door. "But I am much more open minded than I used to be." He gave the boy a quick kiss on the cheek "Thank you." He then went to the hall closet where the washer and dryer were hidden, to fetch the alleged and damnable straitjacket.

Dib stopped at the door and kept one hand on the knob while he watched Dwicky. His curious nature had him watching every move the other made, but what was pulled out of the closet caused him to tense up. He quickly looked back at the door in front of him, not wanting to look at the jacket anymore. The arm that held Skeets clutched the plush too tightly for it to be healthy.

Dwicky rolled and tucked the jacket under one arm, going back to the front door to slip his shoes on. "Alright. I think we have everything. Let's go."

Dib only nodded his head in response. He turned the knob on the door and opened it for the both of them. He was the first out, but it showed in his steps that he didn't want to go. His good mood seemed to have been left inside the apartment, and wasn't coming back any time soon.


	16. Sessions 16

**Monsters and Ladybugs **  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating ** R  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** Azi

Chapter 16

Another dear morning in the same place but in a new bed, in the new room, with the same nurses who fed the new medicines. There was the same flute of codes pressed, the same groan of doors sliding open, presenting the same tired orderly, who fed the same tired breakfasts that hadn't changed since centuries ago. It was probably the same stock of food from back then too. Lumpy porridge that had the same consistency of vomit. With the same temperature and taste, it might as well have been. The juice was always stale and tasted far more like a chemical bath of artificial fruit flavor for the stomach than anything truly healthy. And they never gave much more than those tiny cups that they usually used for water when giving pills; waste not.  
The air was stale, recycled, and stank of old wheat, and too sweet juice even long after breakfast had come and gone. The old smell of sweat from fevered nights still hung around like a cloudy day, dragging the memories of bad dreams with them.

This place definitely wasn't Dwicky's home.

Dib lay on his bed long after waking up, long after his morning medication, and long after breakfast. Having to go back to the same routine in the dirty asylum had him wishing he was back with Dwicky. He had to keep cuddling close to Skeets just to make sure the last two days had actually happened. The plush was the only real proof he had at that moment. He wanted to go out again. Even though it had only been a day, he didn't care. He wanted out again. He wanted out of the jacket. He wanted Dwicky to come through the door and tell him that he could leave the room again and go outside. It didn't seem like that would be happening any time soon though.

Then, as if summoned by Dib's very thoughts, the echo of foot fall; one pair guiding another, and another, and another, and another. No, that was just the hollow of the hallway causing there to sound like there were so many walking.

It felt too early for Dwicky to be there just yet, but considering the mood Dib had been in when he left, perhaps the man was eager to come back for him.

Something felt off. Something felt so off it could be tasted; sour and sick.

The orderly could be seen through the bars of the small window at the door. The lilt of codes pressed came, and the locks clacked undone.

That's when the bitter taste rose up Dib's throat.'_Don't let him in.'_ fear whispered _'Don't let him in!'__  
_

Dib's eyes shut tightly at what was just another internal part of himself. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but the noises on the other side of the door had him shutting up quickly. Instead, he rose to sit up taking Skeets with him in his lap as best he could. He opened his eyes just barely once he was settled, and kept them on the door. Finally he spoke up trying he best to keep calm. He didn't want anyone to hear him. "It's fine. Everything is fine."

The door slid open, but the tall man with the rumpled tie, and his usual wild smile wasn't the one to walk through the door. This time it was a girl, one year younger than Dib. It was the striking purple hair that was done up in pigtails, something far too 'cute' for the girl he'd known years ago, and squinting eyes that truly gave her away.

It was who she pulled along with her by the hand to visit with her as well, that was far more shocking. It was a rush of nostalgia; the sharp violaceous hair, and even sharper, dark eyes that pinned themselves on Dib as she entered the room, hand in hand with his sister.

Never in the three years that Dib had been in the asylum had his sister ever visited him. Seeing her form walk through his cell door had his eyes instantly widening in shock. He would have immediately called out to her, but the one thing that stopped him was the second figure that walked through the door. The hair; then, the eyes. For so many moments Dib couldn't think. Anything he had to say had just been erased from his mind by the sight of the other girl. Someone that was supposed to be gone. Even the slam of the cell door once both of the girls were inside the room couldn't knock him out of it.

The girl beside Gaz turned her head with a certain grace to the other girl, but her gaze didn't move from Dib; not an eye lash was batted. "It seems your dear older brother isn't happy to see you. And it's been such a long, long, long, long, _long_," her eyes narrowed at the word, "time, too." The girl tilted her head slightly, so cocky, "I'd call that ungrateful." She turned her head back to face Dib, her voice fell low in such a mockery of good cheer and salutation, "Hello Dib." She raised a hand to wiggle three fingers and a thumb in greeting.

The small greeting finally had Dib coming to. He kicked at the bed a bit while he tried his best to back away towards the wall behind him. The plush falling off the bed in the process. "No! You're gone. You're not real. You shouldn't be here." He shut his eyes once more as if that would make his words come true. "You aren't real. Go away."

Gaz watched the scene before her with barely any interest. She was used to Dib's constant babbling, although, this was a bit more extreme. Either way it didn't matter to her. Not unless it actually helped her. As soon as her brother was finally quiet, she let go of the other's hand just so she could make her way to the bed. She paid little mind to Dib's cowering figure, and instead picked up the plush that had fallen, "I don't think he's very happy to see you either, Tak."

"Perhaps he doesn't remember me," Tak didn't feign her worry well as she sidled past Gaz to the side of the bed. "Maybe," she trailed on, her voice nearing Dib to an uncomfortable closeness, "I should remind him." Her breath touched Dib's ear as her vain accent echoed through his head.Sharp fingers suddenly latched onto the side of Dib's head, jerking it to the side to face Tak. Though Dib's eyes refused to open she forced them to look at her, digging the points of nails into eye lids to drag them open. Green and hard purple flooded into Dib's vision. Sleek eyes, narrowed so venomously in their stark colour. Claws curled tighter in their hold on Dib's face, digging into his cheeks. "_Miss_ me?"

Dib let out a painful noise that may have been much too loud. He stared with forced-wide eyes back at Tak. Small painful yelps left him every few seconds at the claws in his skin, but he ignored it for the vision in front of him. "No, you're not real. You can't be. You can't be real." He tried his best to struggle. To get away. "Get away from me!"

Gaz tossed the plush aside as if it were garbage. Once it was out of her hands she moved closer to the bed just so she could sit down to have a better view of the scene going on. "I guess that's a no." She turned her full attention on Tak. No real expression crossed her face although her words were cruel as she spoke. "Isn't that a shame?"

Tak giggled, her shoulders and antennae shaking with the action. Soon a full mean laugh left her at Dib's pathetic squirms; pathetic restraints that made the boy just that much more pathetic. The Irken glanced Gaz's way, a crooked knowing smile over her lips. "Oh, you're going to love this one, Gaz." Tak turned her full attention on Dib, all good humor melting away from her at the very sight of the boy. Slowly, a wicked grin drew itself on her already malevolent expression. Her curled antennae slicked back as she slunk herself closer to the shaking body she had restrained. Her face was close enough her words could be felt, each breath for each cold sadistic word, "Guess what, Dib: aliens _do_ exist." Her lips snapped back to reveal jagged teeth straight in Dib's face. "_HI_."

Dib let out a frightened noise at those words. If possible, his eyes got wider as he stared straight at Tak's face. At every feature that made up what she was. "You can't be. This can't be true. None of this can be true." His words had barely been stuttered out. They ended up so quiet that if the girls weren't right next to him, they may not have been able to hear him. "It's not true. He said..."

Before Dib could even think of going on Gaz interrupted him. Her voice was cold and still just as cruel, "Who said, Dib? Was it that guy that came by our house a few days ago? Is he the one that told you so?" She stood up from the bed just so she could walk up behind Tak. "Is he the one that told you none of this was real?" She didn't even wait for an answer. Instead, her hands moved up to yank at Tak's antenna just so she could pull them down, and twirl them even more than they were around her fingers. "It all feels pretty real to me."

Tak made a low sound in her throat, her eyes sifting half way shut. Her gaze shifted to Gaz a moment, "She would know too." The Irk flitted her gaze back to Dib, baring her teeth in her grin. She slowly drew her thin pointed tongue across the ridges of her teeth. "She's felt quite a bit, and she can vouch that it's _all_ real. "Tak leaned her head closer, dragging her claws across still tender skin from his previously self-inflicted scratches. "All of it. Every last part." Finally Tak let the boy go. "_He_ even saw. The pervert even gawked."

Scratching. Scratching started in the back of Dib's mind; clawing, clawing at the broken pieces that was left. '_Liar. Liar._' But there was nothing to hold onto anymore. Skeets had been discarded, Dib was all alone now.

"Liars. Stop it. Just stop it," Dib wasn't sure who he was talking to anymore. Tak, or Gaz. Maybe even that small little part inside of him that had spoken up. He just wanted everyone to be quiet. "Stop touching me. Stop talking. Just go away. Just let me get better. None of it's real."

Gaz moved a hand away from one of Tak's antenna just so she could drape it across the other female's neck from behind. "I'm your sister, Dib. I have no reason to lie to you."

Claws crawled up Gaz's arm as Tak rested her cheek against the girl's arm for the moment; they were the perfect portrait of everything femme fatale. "I don't think he believes his dear, sweet sister."

_'The aliens. The aliens! The aliens are in our sister's head!'_

Tak's striped tongue flicked out against Gaz's skin, her eyes still hard upon Dib. "I'll just have to convince him," slender spider limbs slipped from the Irken's back, minding Gaz. A few brushed against the girl in a possessive fashion. Tak slipped from the other's arm, the sharp spider legs leisurely drawing her closer to Dib. The bed whined as spider limbs punctured it bringing the Irken closer, "otherwise." Claws snatched the front collar of the straitjacket.

_'Run! Run before the aliens get inside our head too!'__  
_

Dib had watched the legs come out. He had seen those before. Plenty of times. Never from the person before him though. "No..." He let out a frightened noise as Tak came closer and when he yanked forward he gave out a loud yelp. "Let me go!" The voice in his head caused him to scream the words. "Go away! Leave us alone!" No one would care. He could scream all he wanted, but as many times as he had screamed in the past, no one would come for him. "Don't touch me!" As the words left him he started to struggle against the jacket, and against her hold. He kicked his feet a few times, but they wouldn't reach her.

Gaz had moved back as soon as Tak made her way on top of the bed. The shouts had barely the hint of a smirk finally coming to her face. The whole situation was becoming much too funny to her. "I don't think he likes that very much, Tak." She leaned forward a bit, her hand barely touching one of the legs. "Keep going."

Tak's grinning sneer grew ever wider, wider with each plea, and wider with each struggling movement, but it was Gaz's coaxing that truly made her expression malicious. "Human's pinch themselves to wake up." One sleek leg drew up with predatory grace and grazed its sharp end across Dib's temple, before tapping the boy's questionable head. "But I think this calls for something a little more drastic." It was hard to tell whether Tak was still talking to Gaz, or cruelly dictating for Dib.

The Irk was then pulled back by her pak's legs, and in turn she dragged Dib back with her. She cackled uninhibitedly, that obnoxious laugh of her's, as the boy was forced to clamber off the bed. Up the spider limbs took them from the ground, up, up until Tak's curled antenna almost brushed against the padded ceiling.

Tak glance down with feigned interest. "Oh. The floor isn't padded. Too bad." She looked back to the boy she held dangling by the collar of his jacket. Her lips drew back once more for a rigid toothed smile. "This should wake you up _much_ more than a pinch."

Dib gave out a strangled noise while trying his best to kick. Having his arms bound was not giving him a chance to fight Tak off very well. "Stop it." His voice sounded weak compared to the shouts from earlier. He knew what was going to happen if Tak let go. He didn't have to look down to know how high they were. It was all too much. This wasn't happening. It wasn't supposed to be happening. He said it wasn't real. He said none of it was real. "Please help me. Please make them go away again..."

Gaz looked up at the both of them. Dib's words had her raising a brow for a quick moment before she gave a small shrug. She moved away from the bed just so she could circle around Tak's limbs. She made sure to stay away from the center. She didn't want to be under the area of impact. "Do it."

Tak's grip loosened some on Dib's collar. "It's too bad crazy people can't _really_ fly."

Tak let go, and that's when the screaming, thousands of voices, hundreds of pleas, tens of vicious words, all shouted at the same time at nobody, but Dib.

There was a horrible sounding _crack_ as Dib's body hit the floor. An intense pain shot up through his leg and he couldn't help the strained scream that came from him. All the voices, and the shouts, and the pleas. They quickly quieted him from the pain that went through his body. As much as he wanted both to stop he wanted the voices to stop the most. He couldn't make them though. It was too clear. "Liar..." The word wasn't spoken to either of the girls in the room.

Gaz stepped forward towards Dib until she was just inches from his body. She just barely leaned over so that she could get a good glimpse at her brother's face before she pulled back. "I think you broke him, Tak." The words finally had her turning her attention back up to the other female.

"For Earth's 'protector' you sure have become," Tak wiggled her fingers to find the word, " 'fragile', Dib." The Irken was lowered down by her pak's limbs, her boots clacking on the tiled floor next to the prone body. "Running, jumping, _climbing_, snooping; You used to do all of those things without falling on your butt and going 'snap'." She poked at the pained area she watched Dib flinch. She gave a mean laugh. "Did that wake you up, Dib? Do you believe us now?" Tak moved to Dib's side, lashing out to grab the boy's collar again to drag him back up to meet her sardonic expression. "Or do you need to kiss the tile from the ceiling again?"

Dib couldn't help but give a hiss of pain as he was dragged up. He opened his eyes as best he could. The pain made him want to keep them shut for good until both the girls left. "I believe you." His voice was becoming harder and harder to hear, but the panic was clearly there, "I believe everything. It's real. You're real. He lied again..."

Gaz walked up to stand beside Tak just so she could lean against the Irken. She draped her hands on top of the other's shoulder and for a few seconds stared straight at Dib's face. "That's a good boy, Dib." She moved only one hand out just so she could flick the one stubborn lock of hair on top of his head. "If you stop believing then man kind is doomed, right?" She pulled her hand back and turned her gaze all around the room. "Although, it seems you won't be helping anyone for a long while, once again."

Those words had a small pathetic sound coming from Dib and nothing more.

_'You love a liar. A liar. A liar. A liar. How can you? How could you?' _

_'How could you do this to me? Everything he did was a lie. Every touch, every kiss.'_ Pain slipped forth from the murk inside Dib. '_Why? Why! You bastard- why?_'

_'The aliens will eat you. Eat your brains. You failed us. You failed the world. You sold humanity for lies! You sold the innocent children so you could mess around with some old man-- like some high school whore!'_

"Maybe I've already conquered the world." Tak continued, it was hard to tell if she'd just started speaking or not, anymore. "Maybe I've already got humanity enslaved, bred, and slaughtered like cattle. Maybe we've already slipped a little somebody's guts in your soup. The food is already so horrible, who would notice?" Tak chuckled lightly. "Wouldn't it be a shock to know you've been eating the people you've been trying to protect." With a laugh she let go of Dib's collar.

Dib didn't even hold the pained noise in as he was dropped. He tried his best to lean back against the bed, but all he could do was let his head drop back against the bottom of it. "Please stop. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, just please be quiet. I just wanted to get better. I wanted everything to be okay. I didn't mean for this to happen. I didn't mean for any of this to happen. Please, just be quiet." Whether he was talking to Tak, or what only he could hear was hard to tell.

Gaz gave only a small glance to Tak before turning her attention to Dib once more. She watched his reaction to what the Irken said before she decided to speak. "How would it feel to know you may be a failure, Dib? To know you let so many people die while you rotted away in this place? To know that it's all your fault?"

Dib only continued to speak the same words over and over. After Gaz spoke though, it had him trying to curl as best he could in on himself despite his injured leg. He wasn't getting very far.

Tak's boots clacked, bringing the Irken to loom over the fetal-curled boy. She gave the injured leg a forceful nudge, digging the toe of her boot on the sore and the swelling. "Answer your sister, Dib. It isn't nice to ignore family."

_'He isn't our family. He lied. He lied. He lied to get us to shut up. Stop whining! You brat!'_

_'If you want.. you, me, Skeets, we can be a family. SHUT UP!'_

_'Careful. Careful. Careful. Careful. It's too late to be careful now.'_

_'He said he would take care of us,_' the tiniest voice whimpered deep in Dib's chest, with the ache.

"Stop it!" Dib had shouted the words as best he could, considering the pain Tak was trying her best to cause. Tears had already formed at the corners of his eyes, and were finally falling down his face. "It hurts." Instead of shouting he whispered the words. "It all hurts. Everything hurts. Just stop. Make it all stop. Please stop."

Gaz allowed a small smirk to come over her face. She stepped away from Tak just so she could move back completely only a bit. "Look at that, Tak, you made him cry." It was clear by her voice that she found the fact too amusing.

Tak scoffed, her antennae perking. "You really are pathetic, Dib. You really are." She sneered with disgust at the sight before her. "Look at this, look at what a pathetic thing you've become. A blubbering, pleading, sack of wasted flesh." She toed the side of Dib's cheek only to make a disgusted sound as her lovely boots were stained with angsty tears. She did her best to wipe her boot off on Dib's jacket with no care. "Say it Dib. Say it loudly, so everyone can hear. What we want to hear. What the world must learn to know." Tak rested the bottom of her foot on the injured part of Dib's foot, pressing her weight harder and harder. "Speak, you stupid mutt!"

Dib only let out what sounded crossed between a sob and a strained scream. He shut his eyes tightly hoping that would make it all go away, but of course it didn't. His mouth opened and closed as he tried to form words and after a few long moments he finally spoke. The words hard to hear as he tried to calm himself down at the same time. "I failed! I believe everything, but it doesn't matter! I'm stuck in here! I can't do anything..." He stopped speaking as the pain became too much. Instead he tried to get away from Tak once again, but it was becoming harder and harder each try.

"Aliens exist." Tak bore her weight forcefully onto Dib's calf, pinning it hard. "Say it! And don't stop saying it." She straightened, her narrowed coloured eyes catching the sterile light of the room, reflecting the images of the padded walls making her more so like an hellish insect. "Because if you stop, if you so much as even think of leaving here, I'll come right back here for you," those sharp, spider limbs clicked along the tile towards Dib, inching closer to brush against him and enclose about him like the trapped quivering fly he was, "while you're sleeping, and make you scream your _last_ and loudest."

Dib let out a louder scream at the pain that went through his leg once again. His eyes snapped open just so they could dart around to stare at the metal limbs before landing once again on Tak's face. "T-They exsist," he took in a sharp breath, one that caused him to suck in the few tears that were making their way past his lips, "A-Aliens exist. _You_ exist."

Gaz had moved back a bit more during the conversation, and had taken to leaning against the padded wall. She moved her hands up after Dib was finished speaking, just so she could give a small clap. "Very good, Dib." She let her hands drop back down to her sides right after the words left her mouth. Her eyes shot back over to Tak and the sarcasm left her voice. "I think he gets it now. Don't you? Too bad, too. This was becoming better than television."

Tak finally relented, removing her foot from Dib's leg, tilting her head to watch the sorry sight before her. "Far better than the squawk box." Her spider limbs slipped back into her pak, though a few lingered to scrape against the boy's skin in reminder "Don't stop now, Dib. Keep going. Scream it so everyone knows that I'm coming." She pointed a claw at the boy. "Just remember, I know where you sleep at night."

_'..You should tell her where Mister Dwicky sleeps at night.._' a sadistic sliver of suggestion sunk itself into Dib's grey matter.

"Shut up." The words were just as quiet as the rest. After they were said, Dib stayed silent for a bit as he tried to deal with each thought running through his head. Finally after a good long bit he moved as best he could to sit up ignoring the pain for as long as he could. His eyes opened wider so he could glare straight at Tak. "Someone will find out. Someone will see. If they don't I'll find a way to get out of here." Despite the pain, and all the worry, he started grinning, "I'll stop you. I'll stop both you, and _him_. I always will." The grin was wiped off his face and the glare returned. A cruel demented sort of look coming over his face. "Rotten alien scum!"

All Gaz could do was bow her head to hide her grin.

Tak nodded her head, her antennae bouncing with the action. "Now there's the Dib that I recognized. There he is." She pointed her claw in gesture "Buried under all those pills, and warm fuzzies. You just have to dig a little...to find that sweet spot." The Irken chuckled as she stepped back, her human disguise flitted back on, becoming more clear with each footfall until she was just another girl standing beside Gaz. "Everything is as it should be." Tak glanced at the girl beside her with a knowing smirk.

Gaz looked up so she could lock eyes with the disguised Irken. She gave a small smirk of her own before pushing away from the wall. Her feet lead her over to Tak, and she stopped behind the other female only to rest her arms around the girl's neck. "I knew it would be a good idea to bring you here." She gave the back of the other's ear a small lick, while her eyes had traveled back to her brother.

Dib continued to glare at the both of them, but it was more than obvious his anger was mostly directed at Tak. Even as he watched Gaz's small display he couldn't help but feel more anger towards the other. Without really thinking, he tried to get to his feet intending to do something, anything, to the Irken. He didn't even stand up before he fell right back down with a loud noise.

Tak's pleased noise purring deep within her throat quickly turned into a cruel laugh at Dib's bull-headed attempt at heroics. Her eyes sifted halfway shut as she lowered her head to press a cheek against Gaz's arm. "It's like pulling the wings off a fly, and then watching it twitch and wiggle as it still thinks it can attempt to fly away again." Her lips touched the other's wrist.

"Hmm, pathetic really," Gaz kept her eyes on the worn out form of her brother for a few more seconds before she finally spoke again, "You should just be good and stay in here, Dib. Trust me, it will make things so much easier on all of us. We've all been much happier." She pulled away from Tak so she could walk towards the door, stopping a few feet from it. "So, keep believing in the things that are real. The things that are clearly right in front of your face. It's all you have to hold onto, isn't it?" She gave a small glance back at Dib before turning her gaze to Tak.

Dib gave a small whimper at the question, but refused to actually answer it. He barely raised his head to watch both Gaz and Tak. The anger completely gone from his face, and instead replaced by all the pain he was feeling in that moment. "I hate you..." It was hard to tell who the words that were finally spoken were addressed to.

"That's not nice at all." Tak chastised as she shook a finger. "Next time we come, we may just bring another special visitor _just_ for you. Wouldn't you love to see your old skool mate, hm? The ugly kid with the skin condition. I know you pine for his time. He's almost pathetic as you.. and that's a compliment. I don't think anyone would notice if you suddenly got a roommate." She glanced over at Gaz: how lovely, two birds with one stone. It was a delicious thought.

_'No. No, no, no, no, no. The bugs. The bugs are in the walls. Between the tiles. In the padded walls- filled with bugs.'_

_'Tell Tak where Dwicky lives. He'll believe then- he'll believe with spider legs protruding from his throat-!'_

_'Don't let her tell Him.. don't let her take Gaz._' that same small voice in Dib's chest pleaded inside of ache.

Something then caught Tak's eye; it stood out so blatantly from all the white, it was hard not to miss. She walked over to it with a cocky sway to her hips until the plush ladybug was at her feet. "I wonder who gave him this." She glanced Gaz's way to see if the girl had any recollection of where it was from.

Gaz raised a brow and her curiosity got the best of her at Tak's words. She walked away from the door just so she could stop beside the other girl and look down at the plush she had thrown aside earlier. Without much of a second thought she bent down to once again pick up the plush and hold it in both her hands. "I've never seen it before. I don't remember it ever being packed with his stuff when we brought him here," she looked over at Dib, "and I know Dad would have never sent him something like this."

"Don't touch that!" Dib had shouted the words in panic and anger. The voices that were talking to him, that were telling him things, were ignored for just that moment. He had no problem with Gaz picking up the plush earlier, but now with nothing else to hold onto, he suddenly felt sick at watching his sister pick it up again. It was all he had left of a complete lie and he didn't want either of the girls near it.

All Gaz could do was smirk at the sudden shout that came from Dib. It didn't stop her from holding the plush. If anything, it caused her to hold it tighter, her grown nails threatening to poke out one of the hard, beady eyes. "Who gave it to you, Dib?" She slowly walked away from Tak, and step by step, made her way over to her older brother. "One of the orderlies? One of the nurses?" She stopped just inches from his feet. "Maybe it was one of the doctors, hmm?" She bent down slowly so she was level with him and almost inches from his face. "Or maybe it was that guy. The counselor. Was it him, Dib?" She couldn't keep the cruel grin off of her face.

Dib tried his best to push back against the bed. "Please stop. Just give it back." He wanted his personal space back. He wanted them both to finally leave. He wanted Skeets back. Most of all though, he wanted to forget the past week.

"Pull its antenna out," Tak chimed in suggestion. She took step by careful step making sure each foot fall landed perfectly in the preordained squares of tile. "That'll get him to talk." She landed directly beside Gaz, leering an amused sneer over Dib. "At least, screaming anyway."

_'Scream!'_ one had taken in the suggestion like a terrible habit inside of Dib.

_'Scream! Don't stop screaming!'_

_'Bite! Bite her face off! Don't let her touch-'_

_'Kick! Bite! Scream! Don't let her hurt Skeets! Don't let her rip apart anything else! Don't let her rip us apart anymore! She made Mister Dwicky lie! Lie! Lie about love, about believing-!'_

_'Bite into her soft, feminine throat- rip her flesh away like wax paper from her veins!'_

Gaz let one of her hands move to the top of the ladybug's head. Her eyes stayed on Dib's face the entire time. With careful motions she wrapped each of her fingers around one of the thin bendable antenna. The grin never left her face even as she started to pull intending to yank the small part off the plush.

Dib watched with horrified eyes the entire time Gaz's hand moved up. Every spoken word he heard inside of his head had him flinching, and his eyes darting between the two girls. For one last second his eyes landed back on Skeets, and the antenna that was so close to being ripped away. A strangled noise came from him that turned into a loud frustrated scream. His attention turned to Tak and in just a few quick seconds he lunged out with what tiny bit of energy and whatever else he had left just so he could latch his teeth down on her skin. His mark missing her throat completely just to bite at a clothed shoulder, but still just as hard.

The sudden movement had Gaz's calm attitude leaving quickly and her body stumbling back a bit since she had been so close. The plush was forgotten for that one moment as she instead turned wide eyes on Tak, and her own insane brother that was trying to latch onto the disguised Irken.

Tak let out a startled noise, stumbling back at the new force and weight thrown at her. But, just as quickly she let out a fierce growl that Dib would dare lash out at her. Her fist snapped forward to smash against the boy's jaw. "Get OFF!" But she didn't stop at just one hit. She continued to smash her fist at any part of Dib's head she could get. Her other hand lashed out to Dib's neck, asphyxiating with her guised claws in retaliation.

With each hit the voices grew louder, louder, louder, scratching at the insides of Dib's skull. Their screams grew more and more demented, warping, feeding off the pain, drinking in each aching throb. Each one shouted something different, but it all meant the same thing: _Don't let go. Bite harder, until you taste blood._

Each hit hurt. They all stung so bad Dib wanted nothing more than to obey Tak, and let go right then and there. The voices were screaming at him though. They were all becoming so loud that he couldn't hear anything outside of his head. They were winning. Despite each punch and the cruel hold the other had on his neck Dib bit down even harder.

Gaz stood up from her place on the floor, throwing the plush aside as she did. This wasn't good. They hadn't planned on this happening. She turned quick narrowed eyes to the cell door as if there was already someone there at that very moment. Thankful that the hall was still just as empty, she turned her attention back to the scene that was going on. She made quick steps up to them both and wasted no time in yanking on Dib's hair back, since Tak seemed to have the rougher treatment under control. "Let go, Dib." It was the same stern expression she had always used during their childhood, but it still didn't seem to be working.

Tak growled low in her throat. She looked about ready to rip out Dib's, but a better idea came to mind despite the maddening teeth in her shoulder. Truthfully, Gaz had bitten much harder in far more sensitive places. "Males." That said, she kicked her leg hard to Dib's groin, making sure the metal buckles on her boots hit where it counted. "They're all the same no matter what species." She sighed, but didn't stop there. Instantaneously, she rammed her knee into the boy's gut, following a fist to Dib's jaw once more.

Dib immediately let go of Tak's shoulder at the kick and gave a pained yelp. If Gaz wasn't still holding him up by his hair, he would have surely fallen back down to the floor below. Although, the next few things Tak decided to do only had his noises growing louder. His face, which was bruised and bloody from the punches Tak had given him before, were topped off with the one last punch. A few drops of blood dripped to the floor, and he couldn't help but give a small whimper.

Gaz immediately let go of Dib's hair once Tak was finished, and watched him fall to the floor below. A small grin came to her face at the tiny noise he gave at the treatment. She kneeled down just a bit so that she could look him over and then turned her attention back to Tak. "Now what are we going to do?"

Dib paid no mind to the either of them. Even when Gaz got close to him. Instead, he curled up as best he could on the floor and closed his eyes. He ignored the blood and the pain in his body just so he could block everything around him out.

_'... think.. of things that make you happy.'_ the smallest of voices spoke; hope _'Think of things that make you feel secure. List each detail. Out loud. Until you feel better.'_

Tak tugged down her collar to look at the painful bite mark on her shoulder. She rubbed the mark making disgruntled sounds. "The bugger. Had he bitten any harder, he might have drawn blood." She looked back to Gaz and gave the other an assured grin, narrowing her eyes slyly. "We'll give the crazy boy the attention he deserves." Tak tugged harder on her collar, stretching it so it almost fell off her shoulder. Next she yanked and rumpled her clothing. "And who can resist two completely innocent girls in distress." Tak brought a hand to her face, giving a dramatic frightened sniffle and whimper. "He attacked us, after all. Then went completely nuts, jumping around, smashing his face into the floor." The facade was ruined when she cracked a wry grin with a wink.

Gaz raised up to stand once more. "Jumped around until he broke his own leg. That's what he did." She moved a hand up to tug at her dress. The thin fabric easily stretched at her rough treatment, and when she was done, it no longer wanted to fit on her body. The grin slipped away from her face as she stared back at Tak, and let her hand fall. A completely distraught expression came over her. "And all I wanted to do was be a good sister and visit my older brother."

"Something good. Think of something good." Dib had been whispering the words quietly to himself while the girls were busy. So many thoughts went through his head. So many things he could try to think of. Things that had happened through the past week, but they were all things that reminded him of the same person. Even the tiny little insects he loved so much reminded him too much of that one person. "I can't. I can't do it. There's nothing good to think about anymore."

_'Then you deserve to never feel safe. You deserve to never feel happy... Ever again.'_

Tak reached over and carefully tugged one of Gaz's cute little pony tails out. "I know. You try so hard." She ran her fingers through the violet hair before ruffling it up, making it a sad mess. Tak's clever grin then fell immediately from her face and she swung around to the door, grasping the bars in desperation. "Help! HELP!" she screamed with a sob to her tone, "He's gone psycho! He's lost it! HELP! SECURITY! He's attacking us! He's gone nuts!" Her voice broke perfectly in that horrified emotion.

Gaz stepped up beside Tak and reached a hand out between the bars. Her fingers curled trying to grasp at anything they could outside in the dark hall. "Help us! Someone!" Her own voice was laced with panic the entire time. "He's hurting us! Help! He's insane!" That last one would get them. It always did.

Dib could hear them shouting. He didn't know why they were shouting or what they were shouting about, but he just knew they were screaming. "I don't deserve it," he continued to whisper to himself. Every outside noise continued to be ignored no matter how loud it got. He wanted to curl even tighter in on himself, but it wasn't possible anymore. "I don't deserve it ever again."

And right on cue came the clambering of footsteps, rushing to aid the screams of the two trapped girls. On sight of the orderly the girls stretched their fingers, their pleas growing just that much more tearful and pitched.

With the codes pressed, the door unlocked, and slid open. The released girls latched onto the nearest body they could find, shaking and crying about Dib's horrific escapades. The other orderly rushed to Dib, yanking the boy up as if he would, like a ticking time bomb of rabid barbarism, explode in a maniacal rage. One on either side they threw Dib on the bed and restrained him.

Beside the doctor in the door way stood Dib's regular counseling visit, staring in shock and confusion; agape at the sight and horrified at the trails of blood left in shocking smears on the white tile. Dwicky couldn't move, couldn't breath. His eyes could only dart from one thing to another, until they fell on the two traumatized girls.

Dib didn't fight as he was lifted up. He didn't kick or scream as he was dragged and restrained. He was absolutely still. Only mumbling tiny words to himself that meant nothing to the others around him. Tiny whimpers were the only thing he actually gave out as a response if the orderlies pressed down too hard on his body. Other than that, he paid them no real mind. None at all.

Gaz had let out terrified sobs throughout her end of the story. Every few seconds she would allow Tak to interrupt which would let her catch her own breath. Once the whole story was finished, she let go of who she held onto, clinging instead to the girl next to her. For the smallest second she let her eyes fall on Dwicky. She had no real expression on her face as she looked to the man. Just as quickly though she turned her eyes back to Tak, only to bury her face in the girl's shoulder as she sniffled.

Dwicky was taken aback by the glance, but soon he was watching Tak hug the other, still shaking as she stroked Gaz's hair and back. The sight made Dwicky feel off, and he turned to follow the doctor inside, shaken. The doctor was saying something, pulling a syringe from his pockets that already had the preordained amount of sedative inside it. Already he was injecting it into Dib's arm; Dwicky suddenly felt sick, vertigo washing over him so badly he had to look away until he was sure the needle was done.

"He has to be taken to medical. Severe head trauma, and who knows what else this crazy boy has done." Dwicky definitely caught that, and he found himself staring at Dib's bruised and bloody face.

Dib didn't even flinch back from the needle. He barely moved at all. If it wasn't for the harsh rise and fall that came from the jacket then it would have been a question if he was even alive. His eyes were barely open. As the sedative shot through him, they were trying to close even more. It was the movement to his side which had him trying to look at the other body that was near him. What could be seen of his eyes met Dwicky's own and for a bit he just stared until he actually spoke, his voice much too quiet to really be heard, "Liar..." His eyes finally shut.

The orderly then lifted the limp form from the bed, dragging the lackadaisical body from the bed by the straitjacket with ease. The boy's head lolled, dripping careless blood along with him on the floor. They carried Dib out of the room, out of sight.

The doctor spoke but it was drowned out to Dwicky but the man nodded numbly anyway to whatever it was. The doctor ushered the girls from the room, leading them down the hall full of apologies and sympathy.

Dwicky stood there, feeling boneless and shaky. His eyes fell on another shade of red in that room. On stiff legs he managed to walk over and pick Skeets up from the floor. Gently he held it, dusting him off, and righting an antenna that looked as if it had nearly been yanked out. Shakily Dwicky moved back to the bed, and sat down with the plush on his lap. Cradling Skeets to his stomach he buried his face in a hand. "No," he shook his head against his palm, "please, no. Not a relapse."


	17. Sessions 17

**Monsters and Ladybugs **  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox **  
**Rating ** R  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** Azi

Chapter 17

It had been hours, maybe even a whole day, since the traumatizing incident that had happened in the asylum. The doctors that worked in the medical wing weren't exactly enthused to take such a patient, but they had no real choice either. An injured leg, a broken nose, a split lip, and one too many bruises. It all led up to Dib having to stay in that one part of the asylum for as long as the doctors said so.

It had been a good hour or so since the sedative had worn off, and since then no doctor had been in to see Dib. Such an incident usually caused the staff to stay clear of the patients for a good while. He was restrained with his arms unbound from the straight jacket and instead strapped down to his sides. Both legs were strapped down as well. It didn't matter to the staff whether one was bandaged up. They still didn't want to take chances.

The sedative might as well have still been in his system because the entire time it had worn off Dib hadn't made a single move. The whole time his head had just been to the side. His eyes only blinked every once in a while, but other than that, nothing.

Still, despite all else, Dib's ever watchful vigil stayed at his side. He'd seated himself near the wall, and hadn't moved since they'd placed Dib in the bed after fixing his 'self-inflicted' wounds. With knitted fingers, elbows resting on his legs, Dwicky stared at Dib going over and over again in his mind to what could have caused the outburst, the violent behavior. None of it made sense, nothing added up. Although he knew Dib was of a coherent mind now, Dwicky couldn't bring himself to speak up. The last words Dib had spoken to him had left a searing imprint, and he feared what answers he would get if he opened his mouth to break the medicated peace between them.

Dwicky lowered his head, resting his brows on his hands, the vision of black and red on his lap; Skeets, the plush had indirectly been the one to keep _him_ company instead it seemed. With a heavy exhale, Dwicky ran his fingers through his shaggy hair for the thousandth time, and found no comfort in it, nor no resolve. Finally, he raised his head, wetting parched lips, he barely found a voice to speak just one simple word "..Dib?"

Dwicky's voice did nothing to phase Dib. He continued to stay just as still as ever. It would seem as if he might have not even heard the other voice in the room at all.

After a few moments, Dib gave a slow lazy blink of his eyes. It could have easily been a natural reaction. Something he just had to do. His voice though made it obvious that it was his own reaction. "Liar..." That same word from before was spoken again. Spoken in such a broken voice.

Dwicky's hands fell to his lap, on Skeets, barely grasping the soft fuzzy plush. His breath caught in his throat at the word he was hearing again. Barely a swallow would pass down, though he gripped the plush; the toy was never meant for his comfort. "W-what do you mean by that, Dib?" he tried to make his voice stronger, but it would only come out weak, and afraid for the boy.

There was a long silence once more from Dib. It seemed as if he wouldn't actually answer, that he would drift away once again while staring at nothing at all.

"You tried to make me believe it wasn't real." When he finally spoke up again his voice was still quiet. Still just as distant. "You tried to make me believe nothing was real. She was real. She was right there. She hurt me. You're a liar. You didn't help me. You didn't protect me." He just barely closed his eyes. "Liar..."

Dwicky went rigid, sitting straighter. He leaned closer, through the gap between them that was much too far. "Who hurt you, Dib?" His brows furrowed tightly, wrinkling his forehead in worried lines. "Who was 'real'?" it was hard to keep his voice from shaking, and his grip on Skeets tightened; one thing at a time, one thing at a time, he could assuage Dib later. But Dwicky wanted so badly to get up and unclasped Dib from the bed, to gather the boy against him and just take him away. He knew better. Dib wouldn't take to touch so soon, especially his. It was back to square one, back to painstakingly difficult stage one.

Dib opened his eyes back up at the questions. The slight bit of movement he heard come from Dwicky had him tensing up, but he made no move other than that. "The alien." His eyes went completely wide once the last word left his mouth. "The Irken. She hurt me. She did it." Slowly he finally turned his head so that he could look Dwicky in the eyes. His own still wide and fearful. "Tak. Tak is real. Tak _is_ an _alien_."

Dwicky couldn't move, his own eyes grew wider as Dib stared at him. The boy's words rung over, and over, and over, and over through his mind but still they just wouldn't sink in. He leaned back in his chair feeling he couldn't sit up on his own anymore. His hands grew cold, despite being buried against the fuzzy texture of the plush he held. "T-tak?" he quietly spoke. That girl at Dib's, with the mole, who snidely laughed when he came over, and today held Gaz in comfort just before Dib's sister glared something evil at him. "Your sister's friend?"

Dib's eyes grew wider at the question and there was actual fear in his expression. "She's in my sister's head. She's in her head." He struggled against his bonds which caused his back to arch on the bed. He ignored the pain that went through his body in favor of glaring at Dwicky. His wide gaze narrowed. "She's back! She has my sister! She's going to get to everyone else!" He fell back down and kept still once more. His eyes wet. "She hurt me..." The last few words were sad and pathetic.

That had done it. That had Dwicky raising to his feet to slowly walk to the side of the bed. But, he didn't touch Dib, he simply placed Skeets where he belonged: beside Dib, near his cheek. Dwicky then collected his hands back to his sides, he tried to keep the forlorn expression off his face; a platonic was a hard one to keep, but the anxious worry was always there. "Tell me what happened Dib. Please, take a calm, deep breath, and tell me carefully what happened, in your own words. I promise to listen, but please remain rational." His hands tightened at his sides, angry at himself for keeping such a calm tone considering; but really, it was the only way to keep things from becoming worse.

Dib immediately pressed his cheek against Skeets once the plush was placed beside him. He gave out a small tiny whimper as he tried his best to find some comfort from the plush. His body seemed to relax just a bit, but the entire time he kept his eyes on Dwicky. "She made me believe. She forced me to believe." He closed his eyes again and instead buried his face further against the plush. "She hurt me just to make me believe. I saw her. I saw everything that made her real. She's not human." He raised his eyes back up once more to look at the other. "She did all of this to me."

Dwicky's gaze flitted down to the bandaged leg then back up to Dib's bruised and bandaged face. It was getting harder and harder to keep it all in, it left Dwicky with nothing but a despondent empty feeling; a helplessness. But, he had to be the one with all the answers, Dib had no one else. Now even less than what Dwicky thought he had. Dwicky forced himself to speak on. "What did she do, Dib? Tell me specifically, what did she do when she came into your room with your sister." He could feel his nails digging into his palm, his fists so tight at his sides they shook.

Dib opened and closed his mouth a few times. The fear returned to his face even though Skeets was right next to him. "She...," he started quietly and slowly his voice rose bit by bit, "...she forced me to look at her. She turned her disguise off. I saw what she was because she was right in my face. I wouldn't believe so she lifted me up." His breathing became heavy as he continued on. "She used those legs. We were so high up. She dropped me, and it hurt. My leg hurt so much." His hands clenched despite the bonds. "She kept stepping on it. She kept threatening me. I had to believe. It was all true. It was all right there." He turned his head just so he could bury his cheeks against Skeets once more. "She was going to hurt Skeets. Tak wanted Gaz to hurt him. I bit Tak, so she punched me. She kept hitting me." His voice started to become panicked. "They told me not to let go though. I only let go when she hurt me enough." He raised his eyes back up to look at Dwicky again with angry teary eyes. "You lied to me!"

Dwicky just stood there, watching hot tears fall down bruised and swollen cheeks, and for a moment he wanted to give in; he almost wanted to stop being 'Mister Dwicky the counselor' and just be Dwicky. Dwicky of three years ago who had an open mind thanks to an eleven year old boy who was so damn persistent in telling everyone the truth. But.. he couldn't. Life doesn't work that way, not on Earth.  
Slowly Dwicky shook his head, his adams apple bobbing with a thick swallow. "I didn't lie to you, Dib. I haven't lied to you." he started so quietly, forcing his voice to grow more and more composed as he went on. "Your sister and that other girl say that you attacked them, then went about and caused these injuries on yourself. They looked roughed up, ragged, and were crying and screaming." Dwicky took a careful breath and rested his hands on the edge of the bed, still not touching Dib. "Orderlies say they might have heard you screaming wildly about something. And you have a bad history of unruly behavior." Unseen his fingers dug into the mattress. "Now, please" his voice strained with the plea ",Dib, think about this a moment: you were brought here because of things like this. Your story against theirs, and what the orderlies have to say. Think about this clearly Dib, I know you're very smart, you've proved it many times this week. What they did was cruel it sounds like, preying on your problems, but you have to understand that if you say what you think went on, and believe it, things will only get worse. Much worst than this, to be utterly honest with you, Dib." Dwicky rose a hand to his mouth after he was done, shutting his eyes; he felt like his heart was going to thud out of his mouth.

The angry look left Dib's face as quickly as it had come at Dwicky's words. What replaced it was a horrified expression. Even after the other quit talking all he could do was look at Dwicky. His mouth hung open as if to say something, but he couldn't speak. Only after he gave a slow blink of his eyes did words finally form. "You don't believe me..." There was obvious hurt behind those words. "You...don't..." Dib blinked his eyes again as his words trailed off. It only took a few quick seconds for his eyes to spring open and his back to arch off the bed once more. His eyes narrowed on Dwicky as he glared at the man. "Liar! You said you cared! You're supposed to care! Liar! Liar!" He tried to struggle more against the bonds. "_Liar_" He gave out a choked noise that was crossed between a scream and a sob, "I hate you!"

Dwicky nearly staggered back, flinching as if the screams were actual physical attacks; they might as well have been, they hurt just as brutally all the same. Had he not dug his fingers so deeply into the mattress he would have fallen back onto the floor, his legs felt almost too weak to hold him.

Dwicky inhaled raggedly, his breath hitching. "I do care, Dib. I do care. I care a hell of a lot. I wouldn't be here if I didn't care! I wouldn't have stayed since yesterday if I didn't care!" his voice broke, and he once again covered his mouth after he shouted, chastising himself for losing his temper. He sniffed and wiped his nose against his wrist before lowering it back down. "I'm sorry, Dib. I never wanted it to be this hard. I never expected any of this to happen. I never wanted you hurt. I wish I was here to stop them-.. I didn't think she'd-." She was his sister for God's sake. It brought a bitter taste in Dwicky's mouth, that someone so young, and close to Dib could be so cruel. Dwicky blinked his aching eyes but it didn't help anything at all. "I still believe in you." he barely spoke up as he took a step back, hands relenting from the bed, one relenting to rub distraughtly at one eye. ".. maybe I should go." he thought aloud, though barely a whisper.

Dib had dropped back down to the bed. He no longer struggled while he listened to each word Dwicky said. The small bit of shouting the other did had him tensing up once more, but calming down after a few seconds. When all was silent again Dib spoke up. His voice no longer angry, but still just as hurt. "If you believe, then why won't you believe me? Why don't you care about what I have to say?" He turned his head a bit just so he could find comfort in Skeets once again. "Why?"

Dwicky walked back over to the chair. "I do." He plopped down in the chair, unable to stand on his own accord anymore. "I care about every word. I want to know what _really_ happened." He raised his head, though it felt so heavy on his shoulders, and of all things to do he smiled weakly at Dib; he didn't know how he did it either. "But we went over before, aliens don't exist. You said it yourself. They must have used a mask, or some gizmo that did something. Your father's a scientist, right? Gaz has access to technologies that you haven't seen yet." Dwicky rubbed his face, pressing against his temples but as quickly he stopped; he couldn't break here, in front of Dib. Not now. "I'm willing to listen, Dib. To anything." He pressed his hands together, his voice falling quieter, so careful. "But..-just think about it, please, for a moment: what _really_ happened." Dwicky pressed his lips to his hands a moment. "I believe you, Dib, that they hurt you. I know you wouldn't want to hurt yourself, right? Or anyone else?"

Dib gave a weak noise. A noise that sounded frustrated and frightened all at the same time. "I told you what I saw. I told you what happened. It all happened just like I said." His voice was becoming panicked as he went on. "She looked just like I said. I didn't seen anything that made her look like that. She looked just like Zim." He gave another small noise and just barely shook his head. "Her eyes were different though. Purple eyes. It was so real. It looked so real."

Dwicky leaned back in his chair. Dib hadn't answered his question, and that had worry piled up upon worried. He hadn't gotten any sleep and he was craving his twelve cups of coffee something awful. "You said.." he started out slowly "the voices told you to bite Tak?"

The question had Dib tensing up once again. For a bit he stayed silent and refused to actually answer. His face nuzzled Skeets as best it could despite how bruised up and messed up it was. "Yes..." The word came out soft and hesitant. "Don't let her rip us apart anymore. She made Mister Dwicky lie. Lie about love, about believing." He finally turned his attention back to Dwicky. "That's what they said. That's what they said before they told me to bite her. I didn't want to hear anymore. I wanted her to stop. I wanted it all to just stop!" He shouted the last part in a choked voice while trying to bury his face once more.

Dwicky stood up again, but this time he carried the chair over with him to Dib's side. He sat down with a soft sigh, resting his hands in his lap. "Dib." He slowly rose a hand, resting it atop the boy's head, brushing back the dark hair, and hoping to anything Dib wouldn't flinch away. "You shouldn't be hearing voices still. I thought maybe you could overlook them somehow but.. Now, because of what happened, I think you need your medication changed."  
It was disgusting to leave everything to pills; that was the worlds answer to everything. Sick? Pills! Flu? suppository pills! Surgery? Liquid pills into the veins you go! Sad: pills! Too happy: pills! Angry: pills! Crazy: pills, pills, pills and more pills!

"I haven't lied." Dwicky drew his hand back to push Skeets closer to Dib's face so the plush could be nuzzled better. "I want you to get better. I want you to get out." Warmth crossed the man's face as his voice fell quieter, since they were out in the open "And, I love you. And, I never stop thinking about you.. or worrying." He gave such a weak pathetic chuckle it could have been akin to a sob.

Dib closed his eyes tightly at the sudden contact. He kept them closed the entire time even as Skeets was pressed closer. The last few things Dwicky had to say was what finally had him opening them bit by bit. "It hurts." A small sound left him before he was able to go on. "Everything hurts. I don't want it to hurt anymore. Make all the hurting stop. Make it stop like you used to." He let his eyes drift closed again before he went on. "Please just make it all go away..."

Dwicky hesitated a moment, his hands fidgeting at each other and then the end of the bed. He wasn't sure what to do, how he could fix everything, or fix Dib. He rested one hand atop Dib's head, gently resting the other across his chest and leaned his head next to Dib's and Skeets in a sad but meaningful attempt at a hug; the best he could do considering. "I'm here. It'll be alright, Dib," He quietly whispered, "I won't let you hurt." His fingers gripped the jacket, clinging to it.

Dib tensed up once again at the touches. Still not sure how to feel about them. Earlier every touch he felt had meant pain. Now it was the exact opposite. It took him a long time to relax again and when he did he barely spoke up near Dwicky's ear. "She'll come back. If I stop believing, then she'll come back." A tiny whimper came that he couldn't hold in. "I can't stop. I can't stop believing, or she'll hurt me again. She'll hurt me worse." He gave another low sound before he closed his eyes. "She said next time they might bring Zim."

Dwicky ran his fingers through Dib's hair, brushing it back, trying to sooth the other. "I won't let her come back, Dib. I won't let her hurt you. I'll stay here and make sure you're safe," he tightened his arm over Dib's chest just a little more. "I'll take care of you, like I said. I won't let anything happen to you." He swallowed, his voice falling just that much quieter "I'll fix this."

The touches seemed to relax Dib on the outside even more, but it was easy to tell by his voice that he was still feeling much too troubled. "I can't be normal. I can't be okay. I have to stay here." His voice cracked, and the wetness that had been in his eyes finally fell. "I don't want to stay here. I don't want to hear them again. They weren't supposed to be real. None of it was." He just barely opened his eyes, but looked at nothing past Dwicky. "Why does it all have to be so hard? I don't know what to think now." He finally turned his eyes to the man next to him. "Dwicky..." The name was said as if the other had all the answers.

Dwicky raised his head a little so he could look at Dib and try not to fall apart himself. He pressed his lips together into a thin line and smiled something fragile. "We'll um.. get your medication looked into. I'll talk to the doctors about that, and what happened. And I'll make sure you won't be having any other visitors." He relented a hand from Dib's head just so he could run it through his own with a tired sound. "That's a start. Right? We can go from there, right?" He very gently brushed away the boy's tears from his battered cheeks.

Dib blinked his eyes at the feel of fingers on his bruised skin. After a few seconds, he just barely gave a small nod at the other's questions. It was the only real response he could give for the moment. He stayed quiet and relaxed as he laid there next to Dwicky. Finally after a while he spoke up just as hesitant as before. "Don't ever leave me. Please don't ever leave me. I'm sorry I started hearing them again. I'm sorry I saw what I saw." The panicked look returned to his face as he stared at Dwicky. Just don't leave me again, please. Please don't lie to me..."

Dwicky rested his hand on Dib's forehead, drawing away tension with soft strokes of his fingers. "I'll stay with you until you leave the infirmary. I'll make sure everything is okay." He ran his fingers through Dib's hair again it was still slightly matted by sweat and blood. "I'll.. -I'll see if.. after you can stay with me on a more permanent basis." Dib would need constant supervision, an absolute dependent but- it was far better than staying here tied up, shoved away and forgotten in some stuffy padded room to rot away, because that's what was 'best for him'.  
Dwicky gave the smallest of smiles, trying to keep that optimism in his voice "I've done everything I said I would. I won't stop now."

Each word Dwicky said had the panicked look slowly leaving Dib's face until it was gone completely. "Stay with you..." He slowly closed his eyes again while trying his best to lean into the touch on his skin. "Away from here. Away from what's not supposed to be real." He gave a tiny sigh while turning his head just a bit more to press his face against Skeets, but also near Dwicky's hair. "I want that. I want to be okay again." His fingers twitched a bit before they actually moved as much as they could. It wasn't a lot, but they were able to grab just a bit of Dwicky's shirt since the man was so close, his grip not at all tight. "I want it all back."

The man's hand slipped from clutching Dib's jacket down to the clinging hand on his shirt. He clasped the boy's hand, slipping fingers between Dib's. "Everything will be alright again." Dwicky neared his head to Dib's, brushing a small comforting kiss at the boy's temple. "Just relax. Take it easy for now. Clear and rest your mind, you've been through quite a bit." He leaned his brow against Dib's, shutting his own eyes. "When you're good and calm, you'll be allowed to have the restraints removed on the bed. But you'll still have to stay here in bed until the doctor says you can leave." Dwicky gave a calm exhale now that Dib had relaxed. "Okay, Dib?"

Dib didn't tense when Dwicky took his hand. The small kiss only had him blinking his eyes, and giving out a sad noise. As soon as Dwicky leaned against him though, he quieted down, just barely tightening his hand within the other's. He slowly nodded his head again, the action only caused him to flinch a bit. "Okay." His voice was still low, but the panic and hesitation were both gone. "I'll try. I promise I'll do better this time. I just want it all to go away." He let his eyes fall shut once more while trying to press closer to Dwicky. It was impossible considering the restraints. "I'm sorry..."

"It's alright." Dwicky quickly reassured. "It's good you're eager to give things another chance. It's good you want to keep on trying." Relief flooded through Dwicky, and he almost went limp right there and then against the edge of the bed. He felt very lethargic all of a sudden, the constant worry had drained him. The sudden urge to crawl up onto the bed with Dib, to curl around the sad little bound boy became appealing; but of course it was as far from the safe thing to do right now. It had Dwicky letting out a very subtle, exhausted, and longing sigh.

Dwicky ran this thumb over Dib's fingers, closing his own that much tighter around the other's. "You should probably get some sleep now. Some rest that isn't drug induced." He placed another kiss, by Dib's ear where no bruises were. "It'll do your body good. You'll feel more refreshed, more alert when you wake up. I'll get a cold compress.. for your face."

Dib gave only a small whimper at Dwicky's words and tried his best to nod his head once again. It was becoming harder to do though, so he easily gave in after only a few quick seconds. He let out a heavy breath that caused the jacket to shift on his body and right after it his voice could just barely be heard. "Don't leave me. Stay with me while I sleep." Despite how quiet his voice was becoming, and relaxed he seemed to be, Dib still kept a tight hold on Dwicky's hand. "Don't go."

"I'll stay." Dwicky weakly echoed, raising his head so he could smile just as tiredly down at the boy. He once again smoothed Dib's hair back a moment, proving to the other it was alright to feel safe, relaxed. "Let me just go grab you a cold compress." He moved down to touch assuring kisses to the boy's fingers so he could pull his hand free of the grip. "I'll be quick." Dwicky back stepped then quickly went off to pester the negligent orderly that worked the infirmary. It took a few minutes but Dwicky returned with what he sought wrapped in a towel so it wouldn't be too cold for Dib's skin. Carefully he placed it near the most swollen of places on Dib's head. "How's that feel? Need anything else?" The man's thick brows furrowed.

Dib's eyes were open when Dwicky returned, and he had shot his gaze over to where the other walked back from. The cool feeling against his skin had his body flinching just a bit before he was able to relax again. He gave a small noise before actually answering Dwicky. "Feels good. Feels better." He allowed his eyes to close since he knew Dwicky was back in the room with him, and nuzzled his face back against Skeets. "I don't need anything else. I'm okay..."

Dwicky nodded before he returned himself back to his seat by Dib's bed. He reached back over, and ran his fingers through the stringy hair, toying with the now rather sad looking scythe-lock there. "Just relax now. I'm right here, you can go to sleep." Tiredly he rested an arm on the edge of the bed, pillowing his cheek against it as he continued to pet the boy's hair. "I'll be right here when you wake up. I promise."

The touches on his hair were causing Dib to become even more relaxed, and all he could do was give a small 'hmm' in response to Dwicky. Sleeping sounded so good despite what had happened. Besides, Dwicky was there, and he had promised to stay. It all caused Dib to want to drift off even more. So, he gave into the need, and after many long moments, his breathing finally slowed as he fell asleep.

Dwicky stayed as he was long after he heard Dib fell asleep, listening to the slow easy breathes, bathing in the peace that had come after the storm. He shifted just enough to rub at his eyes, making a quiet noise before he buried his face in his arm finding no real comfort in it.  
Eventually his hand stopped, and he raggedly exhaled against the mattress. Slowly, Dwicky retracted his hand and sat up taking a shallow breath. "I'm.. just going to take a quick bathroom break," he spoke almost inaudibly, it was best if Dib didn't hear it anyway. "I'll be quick," he finished anyway.

Silently Dwicky rose from his chair, stepping away clumsily as vertigo washed over him from standing so suddenly. Every step felt so audible; he tried to stay quiet as he snuck out of the infirmary. Out in the hall he didn't bother to silence his footsteps as he clambered down them, paying no mind to the screams of the damned and psychotic as he turned the sharp corners to get to the furthest men's room his legs would allow him to go.

He slammed his palms against the door shoving it open. He sharply turned to slam it shut, whipping the lock closed. Once inside he let out a strangled scream as he slammed his fists against the door. Fiercely kicking at the wall, his scream only elevated in pitch as pain shot through his foot. In retaliation he kicked the garbage over, the contents spilling over the tile.  
"There wasn't suppose to be another Irken! " He shouted with such frustration his voice warped in the echo. "There wasn't! THERE WASN'T!" He beated at the sink, jerked around, and smashed his fists against the paper towel dispenser. He found small satisfaction when the plastic cracked and the whole thing became unhinged from the wall. "I didn't know he knew another Irken! Another alien! I didn't! I DIDN'T! He wasn't suppose to! To know her!" Dwicky's voice broke, hitching on air he could no longer take in. His hands shook, and he gripped at his own hair, raking fingers through it. Rubbing his palms down his face found no solution nor solace. Down his hands fell, limp at his sides, and he turned finding a glimpse of his ragged reflection in the mirror. Just as quickly, he looked away making a disgusted sound, but it ended in a sob.

"Damn it." Dwicky hung his heavy head, but the rest of him sunk down as well, his hand on the wall doing nothing to hold him up. His vision blurred wetly, and he squeezed his eyes tightly, leaning his head heavily against the cold tile of wall. "... it isn't fair."


	18. Sessions 18

**Monsters and Ladybugs **  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox **  
**Rating ** R  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta ** moon-glaive

Chapter 18

Late at night in the asylum hardly any of the doctors or nurses were around to tend to the patients. Mainly orderlies and guards were paid to stay overnight. Without them though, there would be chaos. It didn't matter, of course, since they slept through the late shift anyway.  
Lights out had been called, and most of the building was bathed in darkness. The only lights that were on were the small lamps that allowed the staff to walk the halls. Even the medical wing looked completely empty.

There was one person though. Dib was still tightly restrained to his bed. Nothing had changed, except his need for sleep was receding. He let out the tiniest of sounds as he opened his eyes. For a moment, the darkness scared him, but his restraints reminded him of where he was. "...Dwicky?" That one name was the only word that left his lips. When he got no response, he let out a whimper.

Stillness was all around. The hum of electricity across old wiring caused the lights to flicker in the hallway, but Dib could not see them. Far off, the groans and echoed psychotic wails could be heard through the reinforced walls; though, it was hard to tell whether they were human, or what he could only hope was the sound of the asylum building rotting from the inside out. There was no sound of scuffling, or of clothes rustling to dictate there was another presence. Dib was alone; the only physically sick unhinged mind in the infirmary. Alone in the dark, and the air felt so cold.

Dib hated the silence. He hated feeling so alone. Especially now when he had been told he wouldn't be alone. With another small sound he turned his head, attempting to bury his face in the plush that was still near his cheek. As much comfort as Skeets was supposed to give him, for the moment, the plush wasn't doing it's job. "Please come back..." The words just barely echoed in the empty room, and it had Dib flinching even though he had been the one voicing them.

"_He's not coming back,_" that small familiar voice of fear projected. This time it was different. This time the voice wasn't spoken in his head, but near his headboard in the pitch, black darkness where the wall should have been.

Dib's eyes snapped wide open. For a few seconds all he could do was stare away from Skeets across the room. Then, just as quickly as his eyes had opened, his head snapped back so that the top of his head was pressing flat against the pillow. His hands struggled against the restraints so he could get in such a position, and it almost had him arching his back off the bed. "Go away! Go away! You can't be out! Go away!"

"_You made him go away,_" fear whimpered on, the scared sound skittered across the headboard until all traces of its echo were lost in the dark.

"_You asked us to,_" something just barely whispered behind Dib's ear. "_Don't you remember?_" Then, with a cold, wet exhale on the boy's ear, they disappeared into the dark as well.

Dib dropped back down to the bed as soon as he felt the breath near his ear. It had him shaking within his bonds from fear. His hands curled into tight fists, and he gave a low noise before actually speaking again. "No. No I didn't. I didn't do that." He let out a choked sound, and shut his eyes tightly. "I want him back. Go away, and make him come back."

That's when Dib felt it. It started as a _clack_, tapping the buckled restraint on his ankle; then it drew up, softly at first, along the bandages of his broken leg, then harder; a sharp, pointed finger that leisurely crossed the bare skin of knee. On Dib's thigh one sharp claw then became three running over clothed skin.

"Oh, yes." _His_ voice spoke, it was i H_is_ /i clawed hand that touched Dib with so much liberty. "Yes you did." _His_ voice almost purred his pleasure. Those claws fell down the curve of Dib's inner thigh only to draw back up to hips; the audible sound of boots clacking could be heard as _He_ walked alongside the bed. There was no seeing Him, not when the dark clung to Him so willingly. Though Dib couldn't see, he could hear the green lips pulling back from those jagged white teeth, baring the neat ridges below perfectly wide, inhuman eyes that needed no light to bore down into Dib. "You gave him to _Me_, Dib-human."

With that final tap against the buckle, Dib's eyes snapped open once more. The touches caused them to grow wider. The voice induced his heavy breathing. "No...no...t-this isn't real. Y-You aren't real. You can't be real." He tried his best to block out everything. He tried to shut his eyes again. He couldn't get away though. He was trapped. "You're lying. You aren't real. Stop lying." His voice was becoming more, and more desperate. "Please stop. Give him back."

"_Liar!_" Dib heard his own distraught voice, echoing around him like a bad memory. "_Liar! Liar!_" Each accusing word stabbing at himself this time.

"Shall we test that theory?" Those claws were dragging themselves along Dib's straitjacket then, clinking the metal buckles that kept it fastened to the boy's person. They dug into the coarse fabric drawing across like nails on hot, rain-drenched skin; but it was warm inside. It was warm inside Dwicky's apartment, on his couch, and the man lifted up Dib's shirt to draw fingertips against skin.

"How real do I feel, Dib-thing?" _His_ words hissed against Dib's ear this time.

_"You said you cared! You're supposed to care!_" Dib heard his voice scream again, muffled and strained. "_Liar! Liar!_"

The Irken's claw traced slowly, following an invisible pattern on Dib's chest, a small heart; but it was Dib's finger that followed the motion on someone else's palm entirely.

"_I hate you!_" the boy's voice screamed at a Dwicky that just was no longer there; and would never be there again.

A frustrated, yet horrified shout left Dib's mouth at each word that was thrown back at him. At each touch that the other was giving him. "Stop it!" The words were shouted in a cracked voice. "Stop!" Tears formed at the corner of his eyes. The situation was scaring him. It felt so real. It wasn't supposed to be real. He let out a pathetic noise before turning his head away from where the other's voice had come from. "Can't be real. It can't be."

"_You hate him. You hate him so much for letting HER hurt us_." something hissed at the foot of the bed. He could hear it slink unseen in the murk, slithering closer to his feet. "_You want him to hurt too. You want him to scream in the dark too._"

"_He lied to me. He lied, lied; nothings real, nothing._" Doubt clawed at the walls; though, it couldn't be seen, Dib could feel the shavings shower onto his face; little wet drops that fell from a once clear, starry night, soaking clothing, the peeling off of wet skin, lips went _everywhere_.

"Let's see just how much more real I can make it for you, Dib-sect." Gloved claws reached across Dib's neck, how many times had he wanted to bite the pale skin and leave a meaningful mark there. Claws plucked the plush that was nuzzled so tightly against the boy's neck and cheek, taking the cheerful, red, and black ladybug tightly between cruel claws.

"No!" The word was almost screamed as Dib turned his head back around to watch the plush be taken away. Each voice he heard was ignored, but definitely not forgotten. He was shaking worse than before. His hands were struggling against the buckles, and he would have given anything to be out of them just so he could grab Skeets back. He didn't care about the one that had taken the plush. He just wanted it back, and to be as far away from the other body as possible. ""Don't touch it! Please...don't touch it..."

_'Bite! Bite her face off! Don't let them touch-'_ the same words from before screamed instantly as Dib spoke. _'Kick! Bite! Scream! Don't let them hurt Skeets! Don't let them rip apart anything else!'_

_'Then you deserve to never feel safe. You deserve to never feel happy... Ever again'_ hope's memory dwindled, there was no light to keep it alive. It's echo was barely heard above the screaming.

_'I don't deserve it.'_ Dib's voice whispered after in the pit of despair _'I don't deserve it ever again.'_

Claws gently pet Skeet's abused antenna, had anyone else been watching the action, it would have seemed genuine and sincere. "I don't think you want this back either." The Irken's grin could only warp in the midst of the dementia. "You don't sound very appreciative of anything that you have, Earth-monkey." Skeets was squeezed tighter by the claw.

Dib could only let out another pathetic, and even more broken sound at the words in his head. The other's words had him lying limp on the bed as if he had actually given in to it all. "No..." The one simple, and quiet word made it all too obvious he wasn't ready to submit just yet. "It's not true. I do appreciate what I have. What I'm allowed to have." His fingers just barely twitched and he turned his eyes towards that jagged grin. Although, he tried not to break, just one look had him crumbling. "J-Just go away. G-Give it back and go away."

"_Liar!_" Dib's voice screamed back at him. "_You're a liar! You don't care! Stop pretending that you do!_" His own voice broke in that hateful tone.

"I didn't think so." The Irken responded to Dib's gaze by widening his own intense eyes. Skeets seams complained as his back and front were pulled apart from each other, his soft fuzzy skin already pierced by claws. "_You're_ the liar, Dib-human; always lying about things that don't exist, always lying about things only you can hear. Making up lies from that big crazy head of yours." Thread ripped tearing into the fabric as the seams sought to hold the plush intact; rending of pretty dresses on pretty purple-haired girls screaming for Dib to stop, stop, stop! "You want everyone to cry,"_ He_ continued on, "to cry in _your_ darkness, from _your_ monsters."

"_Don't let go! Bite harder! ...until you taste blood!_"

The salty, metallic tang entered Dib's mouth and covered his throat; but of course, he had pierced the dear, sweet flesh of an innocent, little girl with his teeth only seconds ago. His little sister wouldn't stop screaming.

Dib's eyes were as wide as they could get. The taste in his mouth caused him to gag, his jaw left hanging open; he felt ill. Without realizing it, he made the tiniest of noises at each sound of the anguished plush. "Please...please stop." The fact he had spoken didn't even register in Dib's own mind until his mouth had closed. He couldn't stop watching even as the tears blurred his vision. "I don't want this. I don't want any of this. I want to feel safe again. Why are you doing this!" It was amazing how loud the question was shouted considering how choked up Dib sounded.

"_I'll stop you. I'll stop both you and **him**. I always will._" Dib's voice screamed back. "_Rotten alien scum!_" Dib had shouted to _Him_ so many times; in stuffy class rooms, on the school ground concrete that had seen its share of scraped, and bloody knees, and in his own home. Dib's own father wouldn't stop screaming such hurtful degrading things at him in front of the Irken.

But now, _He_ was stepping back from Dib, taking Skeets along still caught in the torture. Back the Irken slunk, though there now were no walls, no curtains, tables or trays, no restraining beds that dared to exist for him to bump into. "Which would you rather keep whole?" That wide, rigid grin never faded as the rest of the Irken had into that damnation of black. "Which would you save from a burning house if you had a choice?" Was it Skeets, or someone else that those gloved claws dug into; under soft flesh that Dib had desperately kissed so many times, was a skull that could so easily be crushed.

Then, there was that familiar smell of burnt flesh; barely perceptive, slipping from the unseen cracks since there were no windows to allow it in. _They_ were again playing outside where they shouldn't be.

Dib's whole body started to shake. "No...no..." The words sounded horrified, and weak coming from his mouth. It was happening all over. It was happening again. "Please don't hurt him. Please..." The tears fell, but he didn't notice. "Don't do it. Please don't do it. Please don't hurt him." He tried to struggle. The restraints weren't the only thing holding him down, though. They never were. "Don't take him away. I need him. Please..."

"For what?" the Irken snapped back, his words almost as sharp as his grinning teeth. "Breeding? _Loving_ fornication?" he spat, his mocking laughter barely stifled the muffled, wet cracking of bone collapsing between his constricting palms. The splatter of blood on clean, white tile was so very audible, from lips that had only days ago bruised his own.

There were screams outside now, shouts of people that Dib couldn't save, would never save; the Irken had made sure of that.

Children screamed as they watched as their mothers were eviscerated, and their fathers were burned alive in explosions _They_ had caused. Flesh fell like melted wax, falling in stinking clumps from skeletal frames, while their mouths wailed for help that would never come.

Dib choked on a scream. He tried to blink, but he continued to stare wide-eyed at what was happening all around him, and right in front of him to the one that mattered most. "I-It's not r-real..." Even as the small, meek words finally left Dib's mouth, he couldn't help but realize how hollow they sounded. "No...please...D-Dwicky..." He wanted an answer. He wanted to get an answer from the person he feared for. He didn't want there to be silence. Silence meant the worst, with that mocking Irken voice; that he had lost everything.

Instead of a verbal reply from that gaping mouth, a sickly, yellow substance splattered on the floor, mingling with the blood already there like oil and water. Blood was leaking between claws, giving the gloves adorning them a sadistic sheen; the red stood out so painfully on the white office shirt. The cracking grew louder beneath the Irken's palms; the human body attached remained far too still. That's when thin, metal limbs fell to the prey. They dipped down to the still body before the Irken, dragging their sharp ends across fabric to tear at skin, to leave bleeding gashes. No cry, complaint, or sob left the man's still mouth.

The scream that had tried to make it's way out of Dib's mouth earlier finally came forth at the scene before him. The sound was loud, but far too broken to attract anyone's attention, if there had ever been anyone to listen. The noise didn't last long before it turned into a sob, and Dib broke down. His body fell limply on the bed, and he no longer tried to struggle against his bonds, and invisible restraints. "Why?" It was hard to even make out the choked word as it left his lips. "Why are you doing this? Why won't you go away? Why did you have to take him away?"

The spindly, metal limbs then curled themselves around Dwicky like possessive fingers. Each one pricking skin on the body, then slowly pressed in, inserting themselves; thick pins in soft skin.

Dwicky's head jerked up in the Irken's hands, a sharp scream was gagged by blood, vomit and all other things vile from inside. He tried to get free but his muscles only twitched, his damaged brain failing to properly send the messages. His eyes snapped open, the white of his eyes smeared in red, the blood vessels in them had ruptured from strain. Blood seeped from the corners of his eyes staining his tears a horrific, rusty color. The man gaped at Dib; pleading eyes, pleading, pleading, pleading.

"I think what he means to say, Dib-schizo, is: Yes, this is very, very, _very_ real."

The tears kept falling down Dib's cheeks even as he watched the horrid scene before him. For some reason he couldn't tear his eyes away from Dwicky. He couldn't tear them away from what was happening to the one person he actually cared about. The look in the man's eyes pulled another sob from Dib as he realized he couldn't do anything to make that look go away. He couldn't make Dwicky's pain go away. "I'm sorry..." The Irken was ignored; the mangled body receiving his full attention. "I'm so sorry. Dwicky, I'm sorry." He finally let his eyes slip shut, no longer wanting to see any of it. It was too painful. "I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry."

In the dark behind his closed eyes Dib could hear the sound of snapping ribs, muffled against flesh and organs, as sharp, metal limbs forced themselves deeper. That voice that never once spoke ill of Dib, then screamed a desperate wail for him that quickly choked on his own blood.

Then all was silent, save the rank stink of death outside; in a world that Dib had failed to save.

Someone far away was calling his name. No, it was right next to him. They were desperately clinging to him; holding him down. "Dib! DIB!"

Dib was scared. He was scared to think about whoever it was touching him in that moment. He was scared to think of who's voice it could be calling him. He wanted it all to just go away. The scene that played out in his head coupled with the voice that just wouldn't leave him alone had his body shaking. It didn't stop any of it though. He could still hear his name being called, and each sudden touch on his body finally had his eyes snapping open. One final sob escaped him sounding more like a frustrated scream.

Dwicky stared wide-eyed at Dib, his grip on the boy's shoulders tightening at the sound. "Dib! Please, Dib, calm down!" His voice was so desperately strained with worry. "It's okay. It's okay, now. You're awake." His voice fell gently, trying to bring the boy back down. He firmly placed a hand to the side of Dib's face to get the boy to look at him. "It's okay, I haven't left. I'm here. You're okay. Everything is okay."

Dib stared up at Dwicky with wide, wet eyes. The scream he had let out died away, and there was obvious confusion, and fear in his expression. His eyes darted away from the man above him just so he could look around the room. It was all the same. Everything was just how it should have been; nothing had changed. It was nothing at all like the horrible scene that had played out before him. His whole body was still shaking even as he looked back at Dwicky. For so long he just stared at the other until he started to struggle at the restraints. "Take them off." It was such a pathetic plea, but there was so much worry, and fear in Dib's eyes that it was obvious he needed them off. "Please take them off. Please..."

Dwicky watched Dib a moment, slowly relenting his hold on the boy's shoulder to place it on the other side of Dib's face, carefully wiping the tears away. He gave a slight nod. "Alright. Shhh. You have to stay calm though, okay? Hold still." He continued to gently touch the boy's face, giving him the tactile assurance he knew Dib needed. "Take slow, deep breaths."

Dwicky held the boy's face a moment, trying to find his own breath before he let go. He snuggled the plush at Dib's cheek closer to keep the boy company. Quickly, he went to the foot of the bed to unbuckle the restraints at Dib's ankles mindful of the injured leg. He then went to Dib's sides, and undid each clasp at the boy's hands next.

With each buckle that was undone, Dib took deep breaths as Dwicky had instructed. He kept his eyes on the man's hands until the very last second when the last buckle was released. Finally free, Dib wasted no time in sitting up from the bed, whimpering as he unsettled his injured leg. It didn't stop him from moving forward, though so he could latch onto Dwicky with his arms around the man's neck. His grip was so tight Dwicky was unsure whether he would ever be able to leave the teen's embrace. "You're okay. It wasn't real. None of it was real. He was lying. You're right here."

Dwicky made a soft noise at the impact of Dib latching onto him, but soon his arms tightly clasped around the boy. "It was just a dream." He ran his fingers through the boy's hair, dropping it to firmly rub Dib's back. "It was just a dream, of course it wasn't real. I'm here. I'm okay. I won't let go." Dwicky gently rocked the disturbed boy in his arms. He placed small, reassuring kisses against the side of the boy's head before pressing his cheek there. "It's okay, just breathe."

"It was just a dream." The words echoed from Dib's own mouth quietly, before he pulled back. He stared into Dwicky's eyes for several long moments; he then ran a timid hand over the other's face. His other arm continued to cling to Dwicky's neck even as his fingers traced over each detail of the man's face. Every few seconds his eyes would fall down to look at the other's body before quickly moving back up. After he seemed satisfied, he latched right back onto Dwicky and refused to let go again. His face once more burrowed into the other's neck. "It was all a dream..."

Dwicky was a little taken aback, not expecting his physical person to be analyzed so closely, so scrutinized; it must have been a horrifying dream for Dib to question reality like that. He went back to holding the boy tightly in his arms, still rocking him gently. "Just a dream." he repeated again. "Just a bad dream. Everything is just the same as before you went to sleep. I haven't left your side at all. Just like I said." Dwicky wiped away the sweat from Dib's neck, and hair with his sleeve, stroking through the boy's hair. He pressed his lips near the boy's ear "I love you." he whispered, shutting his own eyes tightly. "I'd never leave you."

Dib's own words, which had been thrown back at him in the dream, returned as Dwicky finished. He tensed up despite how much the other was trying to help him relax. A small, broken noise escaped his lips against Dwicky's neck before he spoke up again. His hands clenched tightly into the fabric of Dwicky's shirt. "I love you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I love you." He tried his best to press even closer to the other body. The action aggravated his wounded leg, but the pain didn't stop him.

"It's alright. You don't have to be sorry. You have nothing to be sorry about." Dwicky moved Dib's legs, taking care to make sure the injured one was comfortable, while he pulled the boy closer. He immediately went back to rocking the boy. "You were thrashing about. Screaming. You were so distraught." Dwicky's arms tightened around Dib, fingers clinging onto the thick fabric of the jacket; it felt so good to finally be allowed this again; although, the circumstance was heart-wrenching. "I'm surprised no one came rushing in like they do." His laugh sounded far too sad, and heavy-hearted, so he muffled it against Dib's shoulder. "What happened on Wednesday must have really shaken you up. You were asleep for so long, sleeping so deeply. I didn't think you'd have another bad dream." Dwicky firmly nuzzled his cheek against Dib's head. "But it's alright now. It's alright." he quietly finished.

"It was horrible." A choked sound came from Dib, it was easy to tell that just the thought of the dream was upsetting him again. Even with the comforting touches, he still couldn't let it go. "It was so horrible. I thought it was real." A small shiver ran through his body. "I couldn't stop it. It was just like all the other times, but it was so much worse. It hurt so much to watch." He tried to smother a sob, but it only came out muffled. "Don't let him take you. Please, I don't want him to take you."

Dwicky didn't press Dib right away. He held him tighter, gathering the boy as best he could in his arms without aggravating his injuries; he did his best to ward the shivers off with his own body heat, trying to rub comfort back into the boy's bones as well. "Who, Dib?" he finally spoke up.

Dib stayed silent after the question was asked, only taking comfort in Dwicky's embrace. After a few moments one of his hands moved to let go of it's tight hold on the fabric of the shirt. It moved down just a few inches where fingers uncurled and began to trace on the white fabric. Slowly, mindless patterns began to make sense. One name that equaled what had once been a complete obsession, but was now a consuming fear.

Dwicky took Dib's hand, running his fingers over it before raising it up to press a lingering kiss there. "Don't worry." he murmured there. "I'm never going to leave. I'm right here." He tightened his grip on Dib's hand. "Nothing will happen. He's just some useless kid. It's okay." Dwicky pressed a few more kisses to the boy's temple minding the still swollen bruises. "How's your face feel? Your leg?" He gently rested his hand on Dib's knee, looking the injured leg over. "Do you need anything for it?" He rubbed the boy's thigh, trying to keep Dib at ease as much as he could. "Do you need anything? A drink of water, maybe?"

Dib quickly shook his head at each question. "No, I don't need anything." Everything really did hurt. Moving around so much had aggravated his leg and the pain in his face was giving him a headache, but he refused to tell Dwicky that. The man would only leave, and at the moment that was not what he wanted. "I'm fine. Everything feels fine." His hand clenched tightly under Dwicky's own for a second. "I just want you to stay here. That's all I want."

Dwicky gave a small nod against Dib's head. "Okay, I can do that." he quietly agreed. He easily settled in to keep the boy firmly against him, rubbing the boy's back to keep him stabilized. It was best to approach this with ample patience; to wait it out, like everything else. He continued to rock Dib, saying no more, but emanating unspoken understanding just the same.

Dib let out a heavy breath trying his best to relax now that he was sure Dwicky wouldn't be leaving. His hand was still wrapped around the man's neck, but he slowly moved up to touch the other's skin near his shoulders. The nightmare was still so fresh in his mind that he had to make sure what he was seeing in front of him was the real thing. "Why does this keep happening?" His voice was finally heard after a few moments, so quiet. "Why won't it all just leave me alone? If it's not real then why won't it go away?"

"Stress. Mostly." Dwicky quietly answered. "The human body wasn't meant to constantly handle so much of it. So, it reacts the only way it knows how. Unfortunately, more often than not, it makes things far worse, causing even more stress. It's our domestication I guess." His fingers slipped up to Dib's shoulders to very gently ease the tensed muscles there, kneading them. "Dreams are the unconscious minds way of dealing with our thoughts and feelings, our worries; mental catharsis." Dwicky swallowed . "It's best just to relax. Just relax."

Dib gave a small sound at the sudden feel of fingers, and over time, his body slowly gave in to the touch. His head moved even closer to Dwicky's neck so he could nuzzle his face against the skin. The act didn't stop his fingers from drifting across skin and into Dwicky's hair. "I'm scared to go back to sleep. I don't want to see any of that again. I thought it was gone. Even if it wasn't real I don't want to have to go through that again. It was..." He stopped, and instead gave out a choked noise that was muffled against Dwicky's skin.

Dwicky made a gentle sound to soothe Dib, hugging his arms around the boy. "It's alright. You don't have to go back to sleep if you don't want to." He slipped a hand under the straitjacket to run his hand against the small of Dib's back, noting just how much the boy craved the skin to skin contact. "You've been sleeping all day anyway. You don't need anymore." His free hand rubbed against the back of Dib's head, gently scratching through the fuzzy hair there. Dwicky gave a long pause before he spoke up again, quiet and careful, his tone tip-toed across egg shells. "Do you want to talk about what you dreamed? It may feel better to get it all out."

The full contact had Dib relaxing even more, and the small sounds that were coming from him slowly ceased. His body slumped as much as it could against Dwicky. The question that the other asked, though, had his eyes opening a bit wider, a small, frightened sound escaping him.

"Everything I said was all being thrown back at me. I couldn't get away from any of it and I couldn't move. He was near me. I could actually feel him breathing." A small shiver ran through his body as he continued, "He was going to take Skeets, and hurt him, and that's when everything changed. The monsters came out. Everyone was dying." His hand suddenly seized in Dwicky's hair. "He had you. I watched him kill you. I couldn't move."

Dwicky made a soft, assuring noise deep in his throat, curling fingers through the boy's hair. "It's okay, Dib," he spoke ever so softly. "Skeets is right here where you left him. He's been right beside you the entire time. Just like me." He drew his hand away from Dib's warm back to reach for the plush. Though, Skeets seemed further than Dwicky thought he had been. He strained with a groan, then, gave a shudder. Dwicky's chest gave a silent, jerking hiccough; a sudden warmth spread throughout.

The man's hand returned with Skeet's but the plush's seams were stretched, it's fluffy guts spilling from its sides. Dwicky's shocked expression contorted with pain, and he twisted in Dib's hold. He opened his mouth to speak; instead, hot blood and vomit spilled onto Dib. The shirt Dib clung to so tightly grew slick, and hard to hold, turning to a hard, crimson shade. That's when the audible tearing sound of flesh, bone and sinew started, breaking deep inside the chest he clutched to. From it's center a sharp point jutted out, the hot, red color pouring furiously from the spike.

_His_ face was suddenly inches from Dib's, giving the boy rank recycled air to breathe. "Time to wake up, Dib-sane."

There was blood everywhere. It was all over the straight jacket and Dib could feel it on his fingers where the sleeves had been rolled up. His eyes bugged out in an expression of complete terror. He tried to speak, scream, or do anything, but nothing would pass his lips. All he could do was stare into those eyes that continued to taunt him over and over. He couldn't even let go of the bloody body he held. He couldn't believe what had just happened. None of it would actually register.

Dwicky groped at Dib, the movements horribly off, his hands just wouldn't clasp anything. He clawed at the thick jacket, breaking nails on the belts and buckles, but the boy seemed unmoved. A sick wet sound left the man's lips, something akin to Dib's name, or perhaps it was a plea; M_ake it stop, make it stop. It hurts so much!__  
_Then the man went slack against Dib. Fingers twitched as they brushed slick redness over Dib's bruised cheek, smearing the ugly color across his lips. Dwicky slid down against Dib, barely kept up by that long, protruding spider limb.

But the man was still alive, his body still warm against Dib's fingers, muscles still twitching. His head had fallen against Dib's shoulder, with mouth agape pouring blood and saliva down onto his chest.

It was feeling that movement, and wetness against his lips which finally had Dib snapping out of his trance. The barely verbalized words coming from Dwicky forced a strangled sound from his own mouth. He tore his eyes away from the ones so close to his own, to look down at the broken form he was holding. "Please, this can't be real. It can't be. You said you wouldn't leave." His red-smeared hands gripped tightly at Dwicky's once white shirt as tightly as he could, but he was shaking too much to get a good grip. "Don't go away. Don't let it be real."

The spider limb yanked itself free of the mess of flesh it had impaled itself in. Dwicky gave out a bloody scream, arching hard against Dib as bones snapped, slicing up organs with fragments of spine, blood gushed from the rupture as the metal limb jerked out. There was nothing keeping Dwicky up then, except Dib's pitiful hold on him, and that would never be enough. Down Dwicky slid from Dib's wet fingers, falling onto his knees, leaving tears on Dib's lap.

"It's real." Dwicky's words were intensely choked, there was no breath to give them life. A wet, wheezing burbled from his gaping chest, and he gasped for air, but rank liquid gagged from mouth instead; drowning alive from the inside.

"Liar." _He_ countered in a hateful tone referring to Dwicky with Dib's own derogatory epithet.

Dib shot the haunting figure a look at the word that had passed his own lips so many times before. When he saw how blurred the other's form was, he finally realized he was crying. The one, simple word had him choking out another sound before he moved his eyes back to Dwicky. His hands moved from the man's shirt up to his face, instead wiping along his cheeks leaving smears of his own. "No, no...you said none of this is real. You said before none of this can be real. Y-You'll be okay. E-Everything will be okay. Right?" A horrible sob shook his body and panic crept into his voice. "Right!"

But, of course, there was no reply; no wide smile of reassurance, no kind, optimistic words, no more gentle touches to keep him relaxed, or sane. There would be no more calming rubs on the back, fingers through his hair, and on skin; or soft hidden kisses that were only his, in the rain, warmly tangled in bed against the back of neck tickling his skin with I love you's.

All that was left for Dib to claim was the empty touch of a body slumped against his lap, and the soft patter of cooling red dripping to a colder, white floor.

Another sob went through Dib's body causing him to shake at the lack of response. His hands moved up from Dwicky's face to run what would be one final time through the man's hair. "W-Why?" The word almost came out as a strangled cry causing him to stutter horribly. Although his eyes were still on the lifeless body in front of him, it was much too clear he was speaking to the other being in the room. "Why are you doing this? Why won't you leave me alone? Why did you do this to him?"

"I didn't do it," but, it wasn't the Irken's voice Dib heard across from him, it was his own. It was his own face that he saw stare back at him; his own horrified expression, distraught with tears that wouldn't stop running down his bruised and swollen cheeks. "_You_ did."

Dib's touch was inhibited by the gloves on his hands as they had ran through Dwicky's hair, his four sharp fingers snagging against tangles in dark, bloody hair. The red had only darkened the bright pink of a striped uniform adorning his own body. Dwicky's body barely slumped against him, still dangling from that one spindly, metal limb that came from the pak on his back. The cold blood now splashed down on Dib's already wet, sticky, black boots.

Dib could feel his whole body shaking as he lifted his hands from Dwicky's hair only to stare down at bloody gloves. "No..." that one word was said in that rough tone that wasn't his own. He suddenly felt the need to get away from the body that was so close to him. "No...no...no." Without much thought he backed away from Dwicky's lifeless body and further on the bed. "It wasn't...I'm not..." He reached claws up to scratch at the side of his head. His eyes closing tightly as he tried to block everything out. "I didn't do it. It's not true. It's not my fault!" He didn't even know who he was screaming to anymore, but he knew it was someone. "Please, it can't be my fault. It can't be. Please..." His voice fell to a soft mumble for only a few seconds.

"Please!" The word was screamed in sad frustration as Dib's eyes snapped open. His body arched off the bed, but only as much as it was allowed to which caused him to struggle and let out even more pathetic sounds. "I'm not you! It's not my fault! Please!" His shouts were punctuated by frustrated noises and sobs.

The person standing beside the bed jerked back in shock, nearly falling over. "D-Dib? Dib!" Hands firmly pressed themselves down on the boy's shoulders, trying to bring Dib down, trying to bring him level. "DIB!" the man screamed, trying to gain the boy's attention. "Dib! Please, Dib, calm down!" That voice, it was that familiar voice; alive, talking when it shouldn't have been.

The voice had every sound and word from Dib suddenly ceasing as his eyes darted towards the source. For some time all he could do was stare, completely stilling before his eyes moved all around the room. It was the same. Again. This had all happened before. It had a horrible feeling coming over him and he suddenly started struggling all over again. "No...please..." The words came out pathetic.

"It's okay." The hands on Dib's shoulders didn't bind him to the bed, yet they kept firm, tightening as if that would ground Dib. " It's okay now, you're awake." Those words, those gentle, falling words brought such a familiar taste in Dib's mouth; almost sticky sweet. Again, like a repeating echo, Dwicky's hand firmly placed itself to the side of Dib's face to get the boy's attention. "It's okay, I haven't left. I'm here. You're okay. Everything is okay."

Dib flinched away from each touch as if they burned. "No it's not. It's not okay." He continued to struggle, but he was slowly becoming tired, and his leg was starting to bother him. "It's going to happen again. I don't want to see it again." He shut his eyes tightly causing tears that hid in his eyes to finally fall. "I don't want to watch it again..."

Dwicky drew his hands away from Dib's shoulders withdrawing completely, realizing his touch only aggravated the situation. He rested them on the side of the bed; they twitched wanting to wipe away those hurtful tears, but instead, he clutched at the mattress. "W-what's going to happen, Dib?" it was hard to keep the worry from shaking his voice. "Nothing has happened since you went to sleep. I've been right here." He pointed at the mattress in gesture. "Right here, like I promised." Dwicky tried to at least touch Dib's arm in reassurance.

Dib shook his head violently at the question. The touch on his arm had his eyes snapping open, and looking back to Dwicky. A small, fearful sound came from his throat before he spoke up, "I can't. I can't say it. If I say it then it'll happen." He shook his head again, and once more tried to struggle with the restraints. "I don't want it to happen. I don't want to see it again."

Dwicky closed his mouth, but his hand closed around Dib's thin forearm inside the jacket sleeve. Very carefully he tried to rub a little comfort into the boy's arm. "It's okay." he started softly, "It was just a dream. A bad dream."

Dib continued to shake his head while his eyes fell closed once more. "No, it's still here. What if it's still here? What if it's still happening?" His hands clenched tightly trying to claw at the sheets beneath him. "It's happening over and over again. He won't make it stop!"

Dwicky slowly sat down on the seat he had pulled up next to Dib's bed; though, he still kept a hand on Dib's arm. "You've been thrashing about, screaming." He swallowed thick worry, but it still cracked his voice a little. "Tossing, turning. You kept saying my name." His fingers lightly toyed with the sleeve, meekly running down to touch one of those clawing hands. "I'm surprised no one came rushing in.." he tried to muse, trying to lighten the mood, but it sounded more sad.

Dib tensed up at Dwicky's words and his hands clawed even worse at the bed. "Stop...it's happening all over again. Please stop." He let out a broken sound before it turned into a sob. "He'll come back. Just stop. Make it stop." He stopped struggling completely so he could just lie on the bed with tightly shut eyes. "I don't want it to happen all over again. It's not fair..."

Dwicky clacked his mouth shut; he had no idea what he was doing wrong. He settled on a very quiet _sorry _and was silent. He drew his hand back from Dib's, and instead settled it back on the edge of the bed. After that, he just watched Dib with a torn expression, but there wasn't much else he could do.

The silence had Dib finally opening his eyes back up after a long while. Instead of looking over at Dwicky, he let his eyes dart all around the room they were in. He was on edge the entire time as he studied every minute detail he could, considering the darkness and the position he was in. Slowly his hands began to ease up on the bed, and his body started to relax; but still he didn't look over at the other. "Everything is okay..." The words that came from his own mouth seemed to shock Dib, but after they were said he flinched as if at any moment something horrible would happen.

Dwicky opened his mouth, but quickly closed it and instead gave a slow nod. He gave a quick glance around himself, it was the same, drab room he'd been staring at for hours; still, nothing had changed. He then settled his gaze back on Dib. His brows furrowed in concern, wrinkling his forehead.

Dib let his eyes fall down to his body, and stared for a few moments as if he had just seen himself for the first time. "It's not my fault. It wasn't my fault. I didn't do anything." Finally, he turned his attention to Dwicky, and stared at the man with a sad, scared expression. "Everything really is okay, right? Please say it wasn't real. Please...please say it won't happen again."

Dwicky was caught in that expression, and it took him a moment before he quickly nodded eagerly. "E-everything" he cleared the weakness from his voice "Everything is alright, Dib. It was just a dream. Just a dream, nothing is going to happen. I promise. I promise you everything will be okay." He leaned closer, but still didn't touch Dib just yet. "It's just you, and me here in the infirmary. This is real. And nothing will happen." Dwicky smiled so very weakly. "You're safe here."

After the words left Dwicky's mouth Dib immediately looked behind the man. There his eyes stayed for so long just watching the darkness behind the other, before his eyes finally moved back to Dwicky. The scared look slowly left his eyes as his hands opened and closed at his sides. "I want out. I don't want to be here anymore. Please let me out..."

Dwicky nodded, rising to stand. "You have to stay calm though, okay?" he spoke very softly. "Take slow, deep breaths. And stay still." The man's motions went slower this time, more carefully as his eyes kept flicking to watch Dib, and his every reaction for even the smallest of things; especially touch. It was the boy's hands first that he untied this time, the legs were last. He finished, then hesitantly walked to Dib's side.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky the entire time, making sure to breathe as he was told. The way it was happening was so different from before. It had Dib relaxing even more until the restraints were completely off. Once he was free, he immediately moved around until he was in the center of the bed, and looked up at Dwicky with wide, fearful eyes. It took him a long time before he finally reached a hesitant hand out to grip at the man's shirt just to tug him down to his own level. His other hand moved up once it was able to just so it could run down Dwicky's chest, gripping the fabric on it's way down. "Dwicky..."

The man wasn't exactly sure how to respond to the strained desperation. His own name had his brows furrowing tightly. Very slowly Dwicky raised his own hands, wishing they weren't shaking as badly as Dib was against him. He rested them at Dib's temples, lowering his own head to kiss the boy's forehead. Dwicky didn't stop there; he pressed assuring lips against Dib's brow, the bridge of nose, cheek, his hair line.

"It happened here, right?" Dwicky quietly questioned in barely a whisper. "Then let's go sit somewhere else for a little while. Here, put your arms around my neck. Your leg feeling alright enough to be moved?"

Dib gave tiny sounds at each kiss while still refusing to let go of the tight hold he had on Dwicky's shirt. The entire time his own eyes darted around the darkness so afraid that at any moment, the worst would happen. The question Dwicky asked was the only thing that really snapped him out of it. "Yes, it all happened here. It happened again, and again." He hesitantly moved his eyes back to the other's face, and slowly moved his arms up. It took him a while to actually move to hold onto the man's neck, but when he did, it seemed as if he wouldn't let go. "I'm fine, my leg is fine." His eyes once again moved forward as he spoke searching all around, which caused him to cling tighter to Dwicky's shirt.

"Hold on tight." Dwicky automatically spoke the words; Dib was already clinging tightly enough to his neck to hang off it koala-style. He carefully slipped his arms beneath the boy, being extra gentle with the boy's legs, and lifted him off the bed. "We'll go sit out in the hall, okay." Dwicky turned and carried the boy out of the infirmary, having to move quite slowly, considering it was so dark, and he had to be careful of the boy's leg. They passed a sleeping guard just inside the large door of the infirmary, but the man was sleeping so heavily, it was doubtful a whole herd of insanely babbling, skipping sumo could wake him up; Dib's screaming hadn't.

Dwicky walked a ways down the hall, stopping when he came to a turn. He went over and seated himself in the corner, Dib settled on his lap. "Is this better?"

Dib could only nod his head in response. His hands moved down away from Dwicky's neck so they could cling possessively to the front of the man's shirt. His whole body hunched over the taller figure, as he looked around the hallway still expecting the worst. It took him much longer to pull his eyes back to Dwicky, and look at the man with fearful eyes before he buried his head in the other's neck. His head turned so he could still look down the hall.

Dwicky had kept his arms about Dib, rubbing the boy's side to no avail. He stared down the hall not really looking at anything; there was nothing really to see but endless grey falling into a darker of nothing. Sleep deprivation was eating away at his conscious mind, and though Dib was completely on edge like some absurd watch dog hyped up on thirty cups of coffee, Dwicky found himself doing nothing more than just sitting there being a well of comfort and patience.

The movements to his side were slowly calming Dib down. It was so silent, and he was beginning to think maybe the nightmare really was over, maybe everything really was okay. He still felt the need to keep his eyes on the hall, but the worry was finally draining from his body.

That's when it happened: he felt the body below him tense up just like before. The horrible feeling from before rushed back into him, and all he could do was cling even tighter as if the man would somehow disappear, or worse; he would feel that sticky red liquid. Dwicky's eyes snapped shut, and his body went rigid. Before he could let even the tiniest sound escape him though, a sneeze erupted from the counselor. Although he was relieved, he couldn't help but look down at Dwicky with wet eyes.

Sniffling, the man surrendered a hand to rub at his nose. "Sorry. Sorry. Still have a cold." Dwicky looked up at Dib. "It's alright." He rubbed at Dib's sides, craning his neck to touch his face to the other's above. "It really is." He gave a small, wet sniff. "I'm suppose to be the one worried about you, not the other way around, remember?" Dwicky drew his hands down the boy's arms to rest his on Dib's clutching hands. "I'm the one whose suppose to be old and graying. Anxiety isn't good for you." he murmured trying to smile just a little bit.

Dib let out a shaky breath against Dwicky's face while he slowly blinked his eyes to clear his blurred vision. "I can't help it. You didn't see what I saw. You didn't see any of it. I..." He stopped right there, and without moving his head he glanced down the hall once more. There was complete silence except for his labored breathing. He finally found the courage to actually go on, "I had to watch it, and I don't want to watch it again."

Dwicky ran his hands back down Dib's arms, resting them at the crook of the boy's elbows. He fingered the thick sleeves. "Would you like to take off the jacket for a minute?" Anything to bring the boy a little more comfort.

Dib quickly moved his eyes back to Dwicky at the sudden question. It had his tight grip slightly relaxing on the man's shirt. None of this had happened in the nightmare, and that fact alone was slowly helping him relax once more. "Yes..."

Dwicky rested his cheek against Dib's, his hands sightlessly falling to the boy's back. He gave it a soothing rub before he started to unbuckle the ties there. He murmured soft, soothing words into the boy's ear as each buckle came undone. When he was finished, he gave Dib's bruised skin a kiss before he pulled back to tug the straitjacket off. He set it aside, and ran his hands firmly over the pale, bony skin. "I love you, you know." Dwicky bowed his head to press a kiss to the center of Dib's bare chest.

Dib gave a small sound before he completely let go of Dwicky's shirt in favor of wrapping his arms around the man's neck, clinging just as tightly as before. A few of his fingers ran through Dwicky's hair still wanting to feel how real the other body was, and make sure he was indeed okay. "I love you too." He rested his head on top of Dwicky's own as he tried to relax. The small kiss helping him a bit. "I'm still scared. This isn't like my nightmare, but what if things are able to change? I don't understand."

Dwicky closed his eyes giving a tired exhale, realizing just how exhausted he was when his eyes shut. Still, he continued to rub the boy's back, though his motions grew more sluggish. "What can I do to prove to you this isn't a dream?" It was a small question, but if he could get Dib's mind focused on something else it would help in the long run.

"I don't know." The words came from Dib's mouth so small, and quiet; they were spoken into Dwicky's hair. "I'm afraid that anything good can suddenly turn bad." His hold around the other's neck tightened just a bit more for a few, quick seconds. "Right now this never happened; none of this did. This is why I think it's all over, but what if all of this can twist into something horrible? What if I can't help you again?"

Dwicky sniffed wetly, resting a cheek against Dib's chest. His hands drew against skin for a lingering moment before they dropped to his own chest where he undid the buttons of his work shirt. "When we first met, I always found it kind of funny how such a small boy could take it on himself to protect an entire world on his own. How could one little person protect billions upon billions of people on something so unfathomably huge as the entire planet. It didn't seem possible to me. But, you were so dead set determined to do it, it didn't matter that it was impossible. You would _make_ it possible, screw the odds." Dwicky rolled his sleeves down and shrugged his shirt off his shoulders, tugging his arms free. "And even though no one believed you, or gave you thanks, you still gave your all in every attempt on your own. I know all of that is over now, and you still have that instinct in you; that constant worry has no where to go.. But, let me be the one to worry now. It's your turn to be protected, and cared for. It's alright to let go. You don't always have to fight." Dwicky placed his shirt around Dib's shoulders, tugging it on to cover him. "Sometimes," he whispered "you have to lose to win."

The words Dwicky said had the lingering tension ebbing from Dib. It was the feel of the other's shirt around his own shoulders, which he easily cuddled into, that had him going completely lax against Dwicky. The words the other said allowed him to realize that maybe everything really would be okay. Instead of gripping tightly to the man's neck he let his hands fall back down so that he could keep a loose hold around Dwicky's waist. Although, he didn't want to sleep, he finally let his eyes close since he no longer worried about the darkness. Even through all of this, though, one small thought wouldn't leave him no matter how much he tried to shake off the worry. "I just don't want you to ever be taken from me."

"Nothing will." Dwicky quietly answered. "That's what separates reality from a dream. Nothing will ever keep me from you." He wrapped the shirt tighter around Dib, pulling the boy closer to himself. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing." He slipped his arms tightly about the limp body against him; the action assuring himself as well as Dib.

"This is real." Dib spoke the words to himself as if that would make the situation more believable. "He's not real, and you're okay. He can't hurt you. I don't have to worry anymore." The words coupled with Dwicky's own had a long sigh escaping Dib's mouth. He stayed quiet for a few long seconds before he spoke up again, the fear gone from his voice. "I feel a little better now."

"Good." Dwicky nodded, lowering his head down to touch his lips to touch Dib's shoulder. "Good." he echoed there.

The small kiss gave Dib even more reassurance, and he took every bit of Dwicky's advice in that moment to finally stop worrying. Despite the small bit of pain, he still nuzzled his face in the man's hair more than content to just stay as he was cuddled up in Dwicky's lap. His hands that were still near the other's waist had taken to tracing lazy patterns on skin as he had become less and less tense.

Dwicky couldn't help letting his eyes fall shut, a long sigh falling from his mouth since his sinuses were clogged. He knew he shouldn't drift off as they were, sitting shirtless in the stark hallway outside the infirmary. Dwicky's sleep deprived body seemed to say otherwise. The warm, easy breath against his scalp, and fingers at his side were too relaxing to resist the urge.

"Just, five minutes. Okay, Dib?" He murmured, tugging Dib closer, nuzzling his cheek more comfortably on the pillow that was the boy's shoulder. "I just need a fiver," but his voice was already fading. He was just too, too tired.


	19. Sessions 19

**Monsters and Ladybugs **  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating ** R  
**Disclaimer ** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.  
**Summary ** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.

**Beta Azi**

Chapter 19

It wasn't the press of a keypad or the sound of a metal door that opened, but just the slow unlock of keys and the thin opening of a wooden door which allowed Dib to enter something that was sane and welcoming. He gladly stepped out of the dirty hallway with the sounds of music and mumbled voices, so he could pull Dwicky in to the place he suddenly called home.

He walked with a limp, and even clinging to Dwicky as he did, it was easy to tell his leg was bothering him. With his stubborn nature he wouldn't let Dwicky carry him this time around. He was more than happy to just walk around. The staff at the asylum had given him his hoodie and shoes back, but sadly his jeans were ripped up. He was forced to wear some of the staff's pants which were far too big for him.

Dib's attitude seemed to completely change once they were in the apartment from fearful to completely calm. His eyes roamed around the familiar setting before landing back on Dwicky, whom he gave a small smile. "I missed this place."

The man shut the door behind them, locking it. Even Dwicky was obviously more at ease when he entered the apartment. It perked him up completely to see something as wonderful as a smile on the boy's face; it was absolutely catalyst enough to have his ever usual good humor come returned in the form of a wide smile. "And it missed you. A lot." Dwicky let Dib lead him the rest of the way in, helping the boy walk at the same time. "Well, the man inside this place missed you more." He chuckled weakly.

Dib gave Dwicky an even bigger smile at his words. He finally moved to sit down on the couch trying to take the pressure off of his leg. The small plush he had kept under his arm the entire ride from the asylum was now set beside him in favor of taking off his shoes. "You were with me most of the week. Although, it's too bad I wasn't really awake to enjoy you're company. It's too bad a lot of things happened." He flinched when he took off the shoe. "It's over now though. I guess that's all that matters."

Dwicky kicked off his shoes and joined Dib on the couch practically flopping over behind the boy. He snaked arms around Dib's middle to cuddle to his back. "Mmph. But now I have you all to myself for the entire weekend. _That's_ what counts." He grinned tiredly and nuzzled against the fabric of Dib's sweatshirt.

Dib couldn't help but give out a tiny, content noise at the treatment. He snatched Skeets back up so that he could cuddle the plush to his middle while moving back against Dwicky. He let his eyes travel around the room once again, and after a few moments a small guilty feeling came over him as hard as he tried to push it down. "Dwicky..." The man's name came from his lips small and afraid. "I'm sorry for everything I said to you before, after what happened. You stayed with me the entire time, and yet I called you a liar and said I hated you." He clutched Skeets tighter. "I'm sorry..."

Dwicky moved so he could keep Dib's back against his chest. "It's alright. I know you didn't mean it. You were under a lot of stress and pain." He nuzzled his face to the back of Dib's neck. "Angry. Frustrated. Scared. Better to let it out than to keep it all in." Dwicky was a well of understanding and forgiveness, just too happy to have the boy out of that place and right there with him on the couch; it meant getting him better again, it meant they didn't have to fall all the way back to square one just because of the last few days. Dwicky placed a few kisses against Dib's neck. "I forgive you."

Dib let out a loud sigh that was easily felt through his body. "I'm glad." He let his eyes fall down to Skeets and let one of his hands move up to play with the antenna that still looked a bit wrinkled up. "Everything I told you, about what happened, do you believe me? I know the part about Tak, about her being an alien, I know that's probably too far out there to believe. The other stuff though, do you believe me about that?" He tried his best to turn his head so he could finally chance a look back at Dwicky, but he wasn't very successful.

Dwicky gave a slow nod against Dib's neck. "The hospital still can't get a hold of your dad. Your sister is rather snide, when she i _does_ /i answer the phone." He gave the smallest of sighs. He felt guilty that he could have been so wrong about Dib's little sister; correction: his family. But he quickly pressed on not wanting to bring Dib down about that particular topic. "How's your leg? Do you want anything for it? Or your face?" He playfully attacked Dib's neck with his mouth despite being completely wiped. "Need anything at all?"

Dib tensed up a bit at the attention to his neck if only because it tickled. He gave a small nod to Dwicky's question before actually speaking. "My leg hurts a bit, and I have a headache. I guess I could take something. The doctors never said I couldn't, or they at least never said there was anything that would interact with my medication." He raised a hand to scratch at his hair as he thought over it. "At least I don't think so." He gave a small shrug before going on while letting his hand fall back down. "Do you have anything here that I could take?"

"I do. Let me look over the leaflet that came with your medication first. They might have included some painkillers with it this time. I swear that secretary has far worse paranoia than most of the patients." With a slight begrudging noise Dwicky let go of Dib so he could sit up. "In the meantime, get comfy." He gave a slight smile before he rose onto his feet and headed into the kitchen where he had left Dib's medication for the weekend.

Dib watched Dwicky until he was completely out of his line of sight before he turned his eyes back to the front of the room. He didn't waste any time in getting comfy and easily curled up on the side of the couch as best he could. It only took a few minutes before he became bored though, and was soon looking around for the remote. The small device was easy to find since it was on the table near his side of the couch.

Once Dib had the remote in his hands, he flipped on the television and started to channel surf. Nothing was really interesting, and soon he was laying his head on the arm of the couch with Skeets tucked under his chin as he waited for Dwicky to come back.

A thoughtful sound came from the kitchen and soon Dwicky came from it with a cola in hand. "I was right, they included the painkillers. They sound rather strong, so I think you'll be _more_ than good. Here." He handed Dib a hand full of pills. "Time for your afternoon medication anyway." He opened the cola and handed it to Dib as well.

Dib raised his head and set the remote aside so he could take the pills from Dwicky's hand. He took them all and grabbed the can, taking a large swallow to make each pill go down. He gave a small flinch, but other than that, there was no protest from him. He set the can between his knees, and rested his head back down on the arm of the couch. His eyes didn't move back to the TV, and instead stayed on Dwicky. For a few seconds he stayed just like that before he moved a hand up to pull at the man's arm in an attempt to pull the other down on the couch beside him.

Dwicky obediently crawled back onto the couch, slipping back to lay once again behind Dib. He splayed his hands around Dib's middle, and was content to snuggle up against the boy. He let out a satisfied breath against Dib's shoulder. It felt good to just hold the boy; as long as Dib was in his arms, against him, things were alright. It meant things were okay.

Dwicky sniffled some, his cold hadn't gotten much better, but he didn't seem to care; nor did he pay any attention to what was on the television. He thought about speaking up and saying something idle, but it didn't feel very necessary.

The small sniffle Dwicky gave had Dib shooting the man a small worried glance. His hand that was snuggled around Skeets moved down to run up and down Dwicky's own. "You're still sick. You should have at least left the asylum for a bit." He gave a small smile. "I know you told me not to worry, but I can't help it. You were supposed to be getting better."

Dwicky had shut his eyes resting comfortably against the boy. "Mmm. I couldn't." He gave a tired smile. "I had someone very important to look after. He needed me, so I stayed."

Those words had Dib curling up even more against the other body despite the can in his lap. "I think I ruined everything for myself." Despite the words that came from his mouth, they were said in a calm voice. "I guess I shouldn't have believed any of it, and I guess I should have tried to block out all the nightmares. It's all really hard though. Some things seem so real no matter how much I try not to believe." His eyes moved to the television that was playing some horrible, cheesy soap opera. "Do you think I'll ever get better?"

"I do." Dwicky groggily answered. He tried to stifle a yawn but failed. He rubbed his brow against Dib's hood idly. "It's uncanny; you do so well outside the hospital. Then when you go back...things change; relapse. True you've only been out for one day...and what happened Thursday was a traumatic event." He made a disapproving noise. "Let's not dwell on it. This weekend we'll pick up where we left off before this mess started. We'll work on simple social interaction, reintroducing you to society and everyday activities. " Dwicky gave another yawn he didn't bother to cover up this time. "In layman's terms: we'll go play in the park." He chuckled lazily.

The thought of actually going outside again had Dib tensing up for just a quick moment before he relaxed again. "I think I'd like that. I'll try to stay calm and enjoy it." He slowly became bored with the television and closed his eyes. His fingers still moved over Dwicky's hand, but in a more lazy pattern. "I feel a lot better when I'm here with you. It's different than when I have to talk to you at the asylum." His voice grew quieter. "I'm not scared anymore."

Dwicky cracked his eyes open. He glanced at the TV before looking off to nothing in particular. "You'll get out soon. Don't give up. You'll do it. Just keep trying." He rested his cheek against the back of Dib's neck, his eyes almost drifting completely shut. It was a while before he spoke up again. "I would love to have you here all the time. But.." That was Professor Membrane's area. Nothing could be done without that damnable man's permission. And with what happened, Dwicky doubted the man would be persuaded even with the exorbitant amount of good news and progress. If worst came to worst, Dib could check himself out-- in four to five years when he was finally an adult. That disgusting thought had Dwicky sick. If it really came down to it he could sneak the release paper in front of Membrane to sign without explanation, the man didn't even glance at the paper the first time.

Dwicky coughed; damn cold. "Anyway." he quickly spoke up again. "Hungry?" He'd spent the last few days at the asylum, and it was well into the afternoon, but Dwicky didn't feel particularly hungry. Dib had slept most of the time; he must have been famished by now, the little stick figure that he was.

Dib just barely opened his eyes at the question so he could think it over. "I am, yeah. It would be nice to have an actual meal." He moved his hand away from Dwicky's so he could pick up his cola and take a long drink from it. Once he was done with that, he set it aside on the table so he could shift around, and roll over in Dwicky's arms taking Skeets with him. He leaned forward and placed a small kiss on Dwicky's lips and just barely pulled back so he could speak, "Thank you for taking care of me."

Dwicky grinned lazily, licking his lips idly. "Mm. Cola-flavored kiss." He ran a few fingers through the boy's hair, toying with the sharp lock atop it. "I'm glad to." He leaned his forehead against Dib's. "Very happy to." Dwicky inhaled through his nose but it ended up in a stuffed-up sniffle instead. He still smiled. "So, then, what do you want to eat?" He made a mock, disgruntled groan. "That means I have to move from this. Such a shame. Given just a few seconds more, possibly a blanket, I could very easily crash right here and now."

Dib gave Dwicky another small, worried glance as he stared into the man's eyes. "Well, if it's too much trouble, I can always eat later." The fingers running through his hair had Dib giving out a small, content noise before he actually went on. "I don't mind staying right here with you." He gave a tiny smile. "You did stay with me, right? It's only fair." He raised one of his hands up so he could grip the front of Dwicky's shirt tightly before he cuddled his head under the man's chin. "I really don't mind at all."

"So comfy," Dwicky mumbled to himself happily as he snuggled the boy in his arms tighter. "Mmph." he huffed slightly. "But that isn't the right thing to do. The right thing to do is to feed the boy who would probably go flying if a large gust of wind blew his way. I've had snack machine lunches and stale coffee to eat; you on the other hand haven't anything of substance since.. wow.. I'm not sure I want to think about that." Dwicky glance towards where his kitchen was. "Hm. Maybe if I allow you a moment of freedom you can grab yourself some snacks. I bought enough to feed a whole army of Dibs."

Dib mumbled incoherent words against Dwicky's shirt in protest. When he realized he probably couldn't be heard he moved his head away just enough so that he could actually speak. "I don't want to get up." It was a lame protest, but he thought it would work. He really was hungry, though, and just giving one look towards the kitchen had him letting out a small noise. He tried to bury his face again so that the temptation of food would be forgotten in place of cuddling closer to the other body and the plush between them.

A hand ran through Dib's hair again, the motions were quite lazy. "I bought chips." Dwicky spoke up voicing temptation almost sing-song like. "And I have veggies. Crackers and cheese. Twinkies? What boy can resist the indestructible and delicious preservatives of the cream-filled delight that is a twinky? 'Not I!' says Dib. There's fruit, bread, sammich innards. Muffins." Dwicky's arms loosened around Dib and he gave the boy a nudge. "You can grab an armful of supplies and eat your horde here."

With each piece of food Dwicky named, Dib's body tensed up more and more. In the end, he finally slipped free of the man's hold so he could get off of the couch. He stood up and looked down at Dwicky with a small glare that he couldn't really keep on his face. So instead, he turned around and headed towards the kitchen still with a bit of a limp. Small mumbled words were just barely heard from him on his way there, "No fair..."

Dwicky grinned at the boy as he left, scratching a hand through his own hair. "Help yourself to anything." he called back in a sing-song voice. "C'mere Skeets." He nabbed the plush in Dib's absence, cuddling it as a makeshift pillow.

Only a few sounds came from the kitchen every now and then. Of course, there was that really loud _bang_ that happened, but that could have been the fridge closing. There was no way it could have been anything breaking.

It took very little time before Dib finally came out of the kitchen a bit wide-eyed and holding a plate that had chips, a sandwich, and a few twinkies on it. He tried his best to hurry back to the couch where he sat down in front of Dwicky with the plate in his lap. He didn't look at the other, and instead just started on his food.

Dwicky cracked an eye open. "Seems like you made out like a bandit." He stifled a yawn and nuzzled his cheek more comfortably on Skeets. "A very noisy bandit."

Dib quickly looked over at Dwicky when the man spoke those last words with a twinky hanging halfway out of his mouth. "Mmm?" He blinked his eyes and quickly looked down at the piece of food before immediately breaking it off. It took him awhile to chew and swallow what was in his mouth, but he was finally able to actually talk. "I had trouble reaching the plates." He gave a small nervous smile."Sorry..."

Dwicky blinked both eyes open as he stared at Dib.

Dib pointed a finger back towards the kitchen. The nervous look didn't really leave his face as he tried to explain. "I broke one of the plates. It fell when I was trying to reach them." He dropped his hand back down just so he could pick at his food. "It fell on the counter. I tried to clean up everything up though. It wasn't too bad." He picked up his sandwich and took a small bite trying to hide his face behind it.

The man rubbed his face and gave a tired groan. "Well, at least you made it out alive." His hand flopped back down to the couch. "Next time you can ask for help you know, shorty." Dwicky smirked weakly as he gave Dib's hip a poke. "I'll look in on the damage later. Too tired. I've been argu- I mean _talking_ with doctors all week." With a decided noise Dwicky moved and cuddled Skeets closer again with another sniffle from his cold. Then it dawned on him. He pulled Skeets out from under his head and placed the plush on the far side beside the boy. "Here. Don't want Skeets to get my cold either." The plush never left Dib, the boy would definitely get the cold from it if he kept it.

Dib had flinched back from the sudden poke only because it tickled. His eyes moved back to Dwicky while he set his sandwich back down on the plate and he took Skeets back since the plush was once more beside him. He let his hand run over the plush and up to the antenna once again. He had caught the small slip up Dwicky had almost made, and it suddenly had him feeling guilty all over again. "I'm sorry." He turned Skeets around so he could wrap his arms around the ladybug, and hug it to his chest while he ate. "Maybe you should have really stayed with your friends. Even if you thought about me, at least you wouldn't have so much to deal with."

Dwicky raised a finger pointedly. "I regret nothing." And down went that finger with the rest on the couch.

Dib quickly looked back at Dwicky and blinked his eyes. After a few seconds a small smile came to his face. He moved one hand away from Skeets so he could pick up his plate as he moved around on the couch and lay back. He wasn't settled until his back was neatly cuddled against Dwicky's chest and the couch. The plate rested on his own chest. He kept Skeets cuddled under one arm even as he started picking through the chips on the plate. "I regret some things. It's weird, but I guess they're things I just started to regret. Of course, considering everything that's been going on, that would make sense. I think." He seemed to think about that for a moment until he gave up and actually ate one of the chips he was toying with.

Dwicky made a thoughtful, curious sound. He looked back to Dib as his hand found itself in the boy's hair again. "What things are you regretting?" he asked quietly.

Even with the fingers running through his hair Dib still seemed a bit tense at the question. "I regret believing everything I used to believe. All it ever got me was ridicule. And thrown into an asylum for three years." His hand moved over to play with a twinky. He picked at it, pulling it apart by the middle until the white filling could actually be seen. "I wasted my life believing in nothing important. I wish I had never met Zim, then maybe none of this would have ever happened. Maybe I would at least be a little okay. Although, I guess either way I would have still been believing in anything, Zim or not." He pulled his hand away from the mess he had made and brought his fingers to his mouth to lick the white filling off each digit. Once his fingers were clean he pulled them away so he could speak again. "I guess I just regret being stupid and gullible even if it all still seems so real."

Dwicky had the scythe-lock twirled around his fingers, and he gently dragged his finger free of the dark hair. "Well," he started quietly "I know it's absolutely no consolation... but," he twined the pointy lock of hair back around his finger once more as he continued, "we wouldn't have this if things hadn't happened like they did. True, nothing can replace the time you've lost, and I wish I had stayed to help but.." Dwicky ran his fingers against the short fuzzy hair at the boy's temple. "I bet even if I did stay.. it wouldn't be exactly like this. And it isn't so bad. Right this second?" His fingers ran through the fringe of hair at the side of Dib's hairline. "Is it?"

Dib almost didn't speak up right away. The fingers moving through his hair had his eyes closing, and his mind drifting off for just a short second until he realized Dwicky had asked him a question. "Hmm, no it's not. I suppose going through all of that was worth it just for this." He let his hand fall back down completely onto the plate. He made no move to continue eating. "I guess if I never believed in aliens, big foot, or any of that stuff I would have never met you at all. You would be a complete stranger to me." He gave a small noise at such a thought. "That seems so hard to believe."

Dwicky made an sound in agreement. "What I'm saying is: there's always a bright side to look for. It may be harder to see at times, but it's there." He gave a soft smile, pleased with how relaxed Dib was against him. "It does no good to worry about what's happened. We all do the best we could knowing what we knew. Just be happy with the choices you will make, knowing what you know now."

"It's hard though." Dib let his eyes close again even as he still spoke on, "I really do want to be happy, but with everything that just happened, I can't help but be a little worried." He tried to cuddle back closer to Dwicky, but the plate on top of his body wouldn't allow him to. "Everything around me used to be one giant worry when I was younger. Now realizing I don't have to think about any of that anymore, I know I shouldn't even worry. But it's hard to look on the bright side of things when you're not used to doing that."

"That's why I'm here." Dwicky grinned as he placed a hand on Dib's forehead to pull the boy's head over and place a kiss on his temple.

Dib blinked his eyes open and turned his head back a bit just so he could look at Dwicky. After a few seconds he couldn't help but smile at the other. "I know, and I'm glad." With just those simple words he lifted his hand off the plate so he could place it behind Dwicky's head and bring the man down a bit. He moved his own head and pressed their lips together for a simple kiss.

Dwicky grinned wider after. "Mmm. Twinkie-flavored kisses." He smoothed back a few stray strands from Dib's forehead. "And I'm glad that your glad that I'm glad that we're glad; so glad that you're glad that it makes me happy." He blinked then smiled with a firm nod. "Yes."

Dib couldn't help but laugh at that. He really had a hard time understanding what Dwicky said, but it was still funny all the same. Without saying a word he pressed his lips back against the other's once more. The kiss was a bit awkward since Dib was still laughing against Dwicky's lips, and considering their position. It didn't stop him though, and he refused to pull away from it; if anything, he pulled the man closer.

Dwicky chuckled, pressing back in the kiss as best he could. As Dib was distracted he pilfered a chip from the plate. His grin wasn't well hidden which didn't help his stealth. He broke the kiss and popped the chip in his mouth with a laugh.

Dib gave a small pout at the fact that Dwicky had broken the kiss and stolen a piece of his food. "I didn't say you could have one of those." His pout slowly turned into a grin and his hand moved from around the man's neck down the back of his shirt. His nails touching skin. "It's not nice to steal my food." He leaned down and licked at Dwicky's neck before sucking at the spot, refusing to let up.

Dwicky shut his eyes a moment making a low sound in his throat. "C-careful, don't spill the rest of the plate." He really had no room to squirm in their awkward position, and he was trying to keep still with Dib's mouth latched onto his neck like that. Dwicky couldn't help his giddy laughter; the nails had him shifting more. "Alright, that's it!" He reached over and grabbed _two_ chips from Dib's plate and promptly chomped on them.

Dib gave a small, annoyed sound against Dwicky's neck, and slowly pulled away so he could glare up at the other. "Fine, if you wanna be that way." Even though he was trying to stay mad at Dwicky he could help the tiny smirk that came to his face as he twisted around. "I'm gonna make sure you can't steal anymore." That said, Dib moved around on the couch while picking the plate up. He wasn't settled until he had pulled away from Dwicky and laid along the other side of the couch. His head rested along the other arm and he looked at Dwicky who was now across from him. "Too bad for you." He gave a tiny grin before picking up a chip to chew on. One of his feet moved out to poke at the man's shoulder just to tease him.

Dwicky huffed some, no longer having Dib or snacks to snatch. He grabbed the boy's foot as it poked him grasping the ankle firmly. "Hmm. Too bad for you that I love every part of you." He firmly dug his thumbs into the sole of Dib's foot, massaging it and half tickling it. He was curious to see if the boy's feet were ticklish. "_Especially_ your legs."

Dib's foot twitched against the sudden attention it was receiving. Instead of pulling away though, he kept his foot where it was and let out a small, shaky sigh. He picked up his sandwich and took a small bite before actually speaking up, his eyes on Dwicky's hands the entire time. "Isn't it even more morally wrong to love a fourteen-year-old's legs?" He finally raised his eyes and couldn't help but start teasing the other. "What's so special about them anyway?"

Dwicky raised his head with a blink then lowered it slightly with an evil grin, warmth colouring his cheeks. "There's no safe way", he slipped a few fingers under the oversized pant leg and slipped it up Dib's shin, "to answer either of those questions." He ran his fingers back down the boy's calf and moved to draw his lips along the inner part of the leg towards the knee.

It was Dib's turn to blush at the answer he got, and at what Dwicky was doing to his leg. He continued to watch, but refused to look away. "I don't think anything you say could really be so bad." He finally lifted the plate just so he could set it aside on the floor by the couch. No longer having to worry about it he moved down a bit and cuddled Skeets to his chest while giving a small noise. "So tell me."

But Dwicky didn't. He just slipped the pant leg up more, brushing it up past knee. He wasted no time running his hand up, smoothing it across the bared skin, then back down. Dwicky leaned down more so he could brush his lips against the side of Dib's knee, drawing it up meant that the skin his lips kissed was on his thigh; that had the man grinning.

Dib let out a low noise at such attention. The last kiss had his small blush growing darker. As hard as he tried not to he couldn't help but give out a more needy sound. He clutched Skeets even tighter. While keeping his eyes on Dwicky he moved down on the couch just a bit more, wanting to be more within the other's reach.

Dwicky's gaze flicked to Dib, and with careful shifting minding the boy's injured leg, he moved more comfortably onto hands and knees. With an easy motion he slipped the boy's pant leg up higher; the loaned pants really were huge on Dib. Dwicky touched his lips higher up the boy's inner thigh, darting a tongue to give the soft pale skin a lick. He gave a sly sort of grin as he raised his head to then look at Dib. "How's your sore leg now?"

Dib had given a rather loud moan that he tried to cover up against Skeets. The sound ended up becoming muffled until it died down. Dwicky's question had him blinking his eyes in a lazy way. The blush never really left his cheeks, even as he tried to answer in a calm way. "F-Fine. It's fine." He gave a small shy smile. "It's much better."

Dwicky's grin could only grow wider as his expression could only fall more sly. "You always say you're _fine_." He lowered his head back down and pressed his lips back to the boy's thigh, gently sucking the soft flesh. He pulled his lips back only to draw his tongue up higher along the boy's thigh. "You're allowed to feel more of a variety, ya know." Dwicky's grin pursed to blow cool air back across the moist skin.

A small whimper was the only real thing that Dib could respond with for the moment. He had buried his face back against the plush he held while he tried to get control of himself. It wasn't working. It took a long while before he actually peeked up from Skeets to look at Dwicky again, his words just barely heard, "My brain isn't working right now, sorry, can't think."

Dwicky tilted his head as he watched Dib. He shifted higher up the boy's body minding the injured leg. He placed a few slow kisses against Dib's arm and what he could of the boy's chest. "I'll stop then." Closer the man moved until he could lean over and lay kisses against Dib's neck, nipping the skin gently. "So I don't distract you from deep thought.. and intellectual conversation."

Dib whined at that, but soon his sounds turned into another moan at the actions done to his neck. "Don't stop." One of his arms left Skeets so he could wrap it around the back of Dwicky's head. "Please, don't stop. I can still try to think." He moved his good leg up to curl around the back of Dwicky's legs as best he could. "Please..."

Dwicky chuckled against Dib's neck. "Alright." he quietly went on, drawing lips to the boy's ear. "Let's hear those thoughts then." He softly hummed, "hmmm?" against Dib's ear before trailing his tongue against the rim, blowing cool air down it just the same.

A small shiver ran through Dib's body at the attention paid to his ear. He gave a small swallow before he actually tried to answer. His mouth opened and closed a few times until finally words were able to pass through. "I think it feels like this room suddenly got way too hot." He ran his hand down gripping the collar of Dwicky's shirt for a second before he moved his hand inside. "And I think I'm much better than fine." His eyes slipped halfway closed and he made a soft sound.

Dwicky mused. He lifted a hand to his tie to tug it loose, though not off. "Is there an actual word for this magical emotion you speak of?" He took Dib's chin next, turning the boy's attention to him and delaying his answer for the moment; just long enough for Dwicky's tongue to slip into Dib's mouth to find his. Dwicky pulled back with a wide grin. "So?"

Dib gave a whine at suddenly having lost everything when Dwicky pulled away. He easily licked his lips trying to taste the kiss that was gone. The flushed look on his face deepened even more as Dwicky waited for his answer, and he averted his eyes as he tried to speak. "I'm feeling..." He shut his mouth for a few seconds and tried not to stutter the last few words out. Skeets suddenly on the verge of being held much too tightly. "...really eager."

Dwicky's dark brows rose, though his smile had gone completely catty. "Hmm? 'Really eager' to do what?"

Dib's eyes widened a bit at the question and he tensed up. After a few moments he slowly relaxed while a small word was mumbled against Skeets that could just barely be heard. Right after though, his eyes drifted to Dwicky and stayed on the man before looking away just as quickly.

Dwicky tilted his head and cocked his ear to listen, but it was hard to say if he caught the one mumbled word or not. All the same, he moved down, but when he came back up he popped a few chips that he had once again stolen from Dib's plate into his mouth with a grin. "Sorry. But you'll have to wait a few years on that one, kiddo." That said, Dwicky pushed himself to sit back on his knees.

Dib moved his face away from Skeets so he could glare at Dwicky. His face was still red, but it was easy to tell he was a little annoyed. "That's not fair." He set the plush aside and sat up away from the arm of the couch so he could sit in front of the other. Both of his hands moved out to clutch at the other's shirt. There was a small, pathetic look on his face that came out more sad and needy than anything. "You can't tease me and then say that."

Dwicky idly licked the salt off his fingers pausing to suck on the tip of his ring finger as he stared at Dib. He lowered his hand and gave his usual wide, pleasant smile. "You did say it was _morally_ wrong." He pointed. "Not to mention _illegal_." He smiled wider and dotted his point on Dib's nose.

Dib scrunched up his nose for just a second. The look on his face turned to a small pout while he looked away to the television. His arms fell down just so he could cross them over his chest and when he spoke his voice was just as pouty as his face. "You didn't have to listen to what I said. Besides, everything we've been doing is illegal. You don't have much of an argument there."

Dwicky's smile softened and he looked down to his own hands which had linked themselves together. "Shouldn't that say something?" He raised his gaze again to Dib. "Like I've said before; we have to be careful. Wait a little bit, hm?" Dwicky had to admit, it was hard to resist such a horribly, childish pout right in front of him; oh the working mind of a young teenager. "At least until your out."

Dib moved his eyes back to Dwicky and for a few seconds he just stared at the man. Finally he gave in and moved his arms away from his chest so he could wrap them around Dwicky's waist, easily cuddling against the other body. "I hate being careful, but I love you, so I'll deal with it." He let out a small sigh and tried to bury his face as best he could, despite his bruises, against the other's chest. "I can just be happy with this, or any of the other little things we do." A tiny grin came to his face that couldn't really be seen.

Dwicky kept his arms firmly around Dib, pressing his lips to the top of the boy's head. He ran his fingers through the boy's dark hair before resting his chin atop Dib's head giving a thoughtful sigh. "Think of it.. like, um, dating." He made an amused sound, running his hand down Dib's back. "Yea. Just, take things nice and slow. To prove my intentions are genuine ..to, uh, yea." He cleared his throat, though his eyes darted about the room. "Ya'know.. c-c-com-it-ment 'n'stuff." Dwicky felt his cheeks grow hot again.

Dib raised his head up just a bit so he could stare at Dwicky after the other spoke. For some reason he couldn't help but smile at the sudden redness on Dwicky's face. "I don't mind that. I guess I can hold out a bit longer." He moved his arms away, and instead let his hands rest on the man's legs so he could rise up a bit and lean forward. Only when his face was inches from Dwicky's did he speak again. "As long as you're really okay with it." He couldn't help but grin at his own words before he finally closed what little space there was between them so he could press his lips hard against Dwicky's own.

The man made a defeated noise, at a loss to really do anything but return the kiss. His hands at Dib's back twitched as they wanted to do more than just sit there so innocently on the boy's back. With reluctance he pulled away with a long sigh. "Hmm, if I had things my way I'd have us doing things _so_ illegal-- you wouldn't be able to sit for weeks to come." Dwicky blinked and quickly looked away giving a nervous laugh, his cheeks growing hotter at his lewd bluntness. He ended up nodding. "Yes, of course I'm okay with it." He looked back to Dib. "Though, I'm not doing all of this for, ya'know, _-that_." he stammered a bit. He smiled weakly. "Never crossed my mind." He looked skyward. "You just happen to.. be.. very lickable." Dwicky's hands slid up to rest on Dib's shoulders.

Dib's own face became red once again at Dwicky's words, but that didn't stop the grin that still refused to leave his face. "Really? It really never once came to your mind?" He leaned forward a bit more so he could rest his lips near Dwicky's ear and speak. "What about when you came back after that one weekend? When you came back to the asylum? What was it you said?" He moved his tongue out to lick at the man's ear for just a small second before pulling it back to speak again. "Business before taking me up against a wall, right?"

Dwicky let out a giddy laugh, flinching playfully at the ticklish feeling. The warmth spread across his neck. "Yes, well, this coming from the boy whose kink is middle-aged men who water their lawns." He carefully pushed Dib back by the boy's shoulders and grinned amusedly down at him. "If need be, a cold shower is just down the hall."

Dib squinted one eye at Dwicky for the sudden push back. After a few seconds he let it slide, but he couldn't help pouting a little. He moved his own hands up away from the other's legs so he could wrap them around Dwicky's neck. The fact he had been pushed away didn't stop him from leaning forward again so he could nuzzle his cheek against Dwicky's own. "That kink is pretty boring compared to the one I have now." He let out a small noise before going on, finally relaxing. "It's still not fair of you to tease me."

Dwicky had settled his arms back around Dib, shutting his eyes and giving into the clingy cuddle quite easily. "Hmm? What new kink is this?" Out of habit he rubbed the boy's back; far more pleasant an action when his palm was running against the fabric of sweatshirt instead of the coarse straitjacket. "How drastically must I change to fit this new image?" He carefully pressed his cheek back against Dib's swollen cheek.

Dib let a smile pass over his lips more than content to just sit cuddled against Dwicky. Especially with what the other was doing. He finally spoke up after a bit, his voice quieter than before. "You don't have to change at all. You fit in very nicely with my new kink." He pulled his head back a bit so he could look Dwicky in the eye, a small tiny grin on his face. "Middle-aged counselors that are obsessed with legs." He let out a small laugh. "You're pretty high on my list."

Dwicky couldn't help the new grin that spread on his face. "A definite relief. Thank god I was so lucky to have all of the above qualifications. No-- hey!" He gave Dib a completely fake glare. "I'm not _that_ old! Middle-age? My, that's just, just, well-- I think I just felt my pride bruise." He touched his own cheek, running a hand down his jaw to scratch his goatee only to run a hand through his shaggy hair. Dwicky then made a face as he rubbed an eye, dragging his fingers over the bottom eyelids. "I guess I'm not aging as gracefully as I'd hoped." He gave a mournful sound.

Dib tried to keep a straight face the entire time, but it really was hard. As he watched Dwicky he couldn't help the small laugh that ended up escaping him. He moved his hands away from the other's neck just so he could cover his mouth, but that really did no good. It took Dib awhile to finally stop laughing, at least fully. Even as he leaned forward to press his lips to Dwicky's he still gave a few muffled giggles until he pulled back to look the other in the eyes. "Sorry..."

Dwicky gave Dib a look, though it was obviously good humored. Dib was laughing! practically a ball of giggles. There was no hiding Dwicky's grin as his own laugh sneaked out of him. "Well then," Dwicky put his arms back around Dib's middle to pull the boy against him "if you like your men old and wrinkled, it can't be stopped." He nuzzled his nose against Dib's in eskimo kisses. "It is your kink, after all. "I'll go grey, grow liver spots, lose my teeth, become feeble and crippled just for you; because I love you just that much."

Dib scrunched up his nose at what Dwicky said, but he was still laughing. "How sweet." Once the two words left his mouth they had Dib laughing even more. When he was able to get a hold of himself once again, he leaned forward to press his lips to Dwicky's in just a quick kiss. Although the entire time he made no move to pull their noses apart. "I'm flattered that you're so dedicated to me."

Dwicky chuckled, practically grinning from ear to ear. "Of course. You've already got me whipped. Say 'jump', I'll say 'how high?'. Say 'run', I'll say 'how far?'. Say 'kiss me', and I'll say 'where, and with tongue?'." His grinning expression grew sly before he pressed his lips back to Dib's sliding his tongue lazily across the boy's bottom lip. When Dwicky pulled back his motion was slow, his tongue the last to leave Dib's lips, drawing back into his own mouth and licking teeth slowly along the way. "I might as well already have the ball-n-chain." He chuckled deep in his throat. "Well, technically, with all of this, I already should have one."

Dib's eyes had slipped halfway closed at the sudden attention and it took him awhile to actually realize Dwicky had stopped. He made a small, humming sound in the back of his throat that could just barely be heard. It was the only real noise he made since words failed him at the moment. When he was able to snap out of it he blinked his eyes at Dwicky before a small smile came over his face. "I enjoy having you wrapped around my finger like this." His smile turned into a pout. "Although I still wish you would give in a little more. It really isn't fair."

Dwicky's brows rose but his barely open gaze didn't change. He took Dib's chin, raising the boy's head even more with a lazy grin. "Oh?" The man tilted his head rather curiously. "And what would you have me do, little man?" He stole a kiss from Dib's lips before the boy could answer. "Hmm?" He kissed the bridge of Dib's nose, his brow, then his cheek gently; missing the mark of lips at every turn as he waited on Dib's answer.

Dib gave a small whine at the teasing, but Dwicky's question had him quieting as he tried to think it over. He easily became nervous and averted his eyes so he could look down at the couch. When he spoke he stuttered a bit before actually saying anything coherent. "Y-Ya know, stuff." He moved his hands down so they could drop to his lap and fidget. "Like in that dream I had." His face seemed to become redder with each word he said. "I think waiting until I get out is gonna be tough."

Dwicky tried not to laugh, it was a mean thing, he was sure, to find what Dib said funny, but it couldn't be helped. He cleared his throat and rubbed his own mouth. "Aren't you kind of young to be saying something like that?" He snickered into his hand. "You're fourteen, you shouldn't have the libido of an eighteen year old yet." Dwicky made too obvious a thoughtful noise. "Maybe we should stop." He wagged a teasing no-no finger. "Especially if I'm giving you the wrong idea. Feeding a teenage boy's imagination with filth." Dwicky shook his head. "And I call myself the adult." He couldn't keep the laugh in.

A panicked look came over Dib's face as he quickly looked back at Dwicky. Only a few of the words the man had said really registered in his mind, and because of that, it had him quickly speaking. "No, we don't have to stop. I'll try to behave." He chewed at his lip after the words left his mouth, and one of his hands moved up to grip tightly at the man's shirt holding on as tight as it could. "I'm sorry." His voice cracked a bit. "Please don't leave me."

Dwicky made a small sound between sad and amused. "I'm just teasing, Dib. Just teasing." He chuckled softly to prove it. "That's a silly thing to leave you over. We've come this far; why go back now, right?" Dwicky rubbed the boy's upper arms. "Don't be sorry." Down his hands followed down Dib's arms to his hands where he pried the boy's iron clasp from his shirt. "Don't be sorry about being honest. Don't ever be sorry about expressing how you truly feel." He raised Dib's hands up to kiss each tense, white knuckle. "I'd rather have you smiling, laughing, crying, shouting, clawing at me because you meant it than smiling because you have to." Dwicky placed a musing kiss on Dib's lips. "Of course, that doesn't leave you the privilege to run amok."

Dib's worries didn't vanish with Dwicky's words, and he was still a bit tense. Even the small kisses didn't seem to help his body relax. "A-Alright. O-Okay." The small words came out stuttered and scared. With one quick movement he pried his hands away from the other's just so he could move forward quickly, despite his bad leg, to wrap his arms around Dwicky's neck. Instead of speaking, he held his arms tightly around Dwicky, refusing to let go as if the man's words weren't enough to reassure him.

Dwicky sighed warmly against the top of Dib's head, rustling the boy's dark hair with his breath. He kept his arms securely around the boy, his hand falling into its usual habit of rubbing endearment and comfort against Dib's back. He softly laced the top of Dib's head with slow, lingering kisses before he spoke up again. "Why don't we go lay down in bed? Relax, have a nap? We can still talk if you'd like, but it might make you feel better to lay somewhere quiet." His hand drew up from Dib's back to run through the other's dark hair, softly skritching the shorter hair below. "Then we'll take a walk through the park. Hm? Sound good?"

Dib nodded his head just slightly, having calmed down a bit from each simple touch. His grip loosened slowly until his hands started to slip away from Dwicky, and back down to the front of the man's shirt. He kept his head down, not once looking up, and kept the small bit of silence since he had last spoken. Only after a few seconds did he finally lean forward once more to bury his face against Dwicky's chest while his hands moved around the other's waist. Even though he seemed fine with the idea, he still didn't seem to want to let go any time soon.

Dwicky didn't mean to make the sad sound so low in his throat at Dib's motions, but it hurt, it hurt so very badly. "Alright." he spoke softly, placing one last kiss atop the boy's head. "Let's go then."  
He picked Skeets up first, and handed it to Dib before he carefully slipped one arm under the boy's legs, another behind him. With a bit of cautious and complicated shifting, he managed to pick the boy up and get off the couch. He kept murmuring little, sweet, affectionate nothings against Dib's hair hoping that would make everything okay again.

He carried Dib to the bedroom and gently kicked his door open to step inside. He set the boy down first, and tugged the bedding back so he could climb in with Dib, covering them both with the blankets.

Right when Dwicky climbed in next to him, Dib cuddled up close. One arm tightly curled around Skeets while his other moved around Dwicky's waist to keep hold of the man. He was slowly starting to feel better, but he couldn't help keep the small, nagging feeling in the back of his head. As hard as he tried not to think about it, and instead believe everything Dwicky said, it just wouldn't go away. "I'm sorry." The words came out before Dib had a chance to stop them and for a few seconds he didn't know what to say after. "I-I mean not for earlier. I mean for now. I guess I'm still scared that at any moment something might happen."

"It's alright. You know everything will be okay." Dwicky nuzzled his head atop Dib's and let out a content sigh. This felt nice, this felt comfortable; it made the heavy situation feel bearable. Things _were_ going to be okay.

"You're allowed to feel afraid. No one said you couldn't. Just don't let the fear control you." The man gave a wet sniffle and he relinquished a hand a moment to rub his nose; damn cold. "Hm. You really don't know how tired you truly are till you lay down." He chuckled weakly; exhausted, but he would stay up for Dib's sake.

Dib gave a weak smile at that, and chanced a glance up at the other's face. At times, just being able to look at Dwicky's face helped him feel better even if the man never spoke a word, but Dib doubted he would ever be able to say that out loud. After a few seconds his smile grew just a bit, and his grip tightened on the other. He let his head fall back down as he started to close his eyes. "I'm feeling better bit by bit. You can go to sleep if you want. I'll be okay."

Dwicky made an indecisive noise. "Are you sure? I can stay awake. If you still wanna talk.. or.. something." He found himself yawning and he muffled it against one hand. "Damnit. Sorry about that." He rested his head back down against Dib's.

"You're leg okay?" He started to rub Dib's back again, the motion was slow but Dwicky was a man of anxiety and concern. "You still have food in the living room if you're still hungry. And um.. uh.." He yawned again and he ended it by cuddling the boy more tightly. "Yea."

Dib gave a slow nod. "My leg feels much better. Those pills I took earlier really did help." He glanced back up and gave a small smile. "All you're doing is yawning. I think you really need the sleep. You spent so much time looking after me that you didn't take much care of yourself, did you?" It wasn't really meant to be much of a question. "You need some form of rest. I don't need to keep you up anymore." He laid his head back down on Dwicky's chest and let his eyes close once again. "I'm fine."

Dwicky agreed, very easily won over by the idea more than he would liked to have admitted. "M'kay. But if you need anything, and I mean i _anything_ /i just wake me up. Alright? Promise me. Any little thing." He ran fingers through the boy's hair, muffling a yawn atop the boy's head. He let his eyes shut, already easily drifting off. "It isn't fair for me to just... up 'n... sleep."

Dib nodded his head once again and gave a small noise. "I promise. I'll wake you up if I want anything." The fingers that ran through his hair had his own body relaxing and he pulled Skeets closer as he curled in even more. "It's your turn to stop worrying for once. Please."

Dwicky's sleepy chuckle almost didn't make it. "Okay." He didn't say anything after that save for a small sniff. His hand stopped, resting against the back of Dib's head. And without much argument easily fell asleep.


	20. Sessions 20

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Zim and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** Azi

Chapter 20

The park near the edge of the city wasn't one of the more popular places to go. There was a small picnic area, a few benches, and a playground in the center of it all. Mostly just kids came around to enjoy it, dragging their unwilling parents along to watch them, but there were also a few couples here and there trying their best to have a quiet lunch despite the screaming children.

Amongst all the noise, a car door shut. A hesitant body stepped forward onto the grass before backing right back into the car. "Maybe it wouldn't have been so bad staying in bed." Dib had finally spoken up after a few long minutes. His eyes strayed to a boy that was running around the slide before getting tackled by another child.

Hands rested themselves on Dib's shoulders and gently pushed the boy from the car. "C'mon. It's not so bad. Just a pleasant stroll through the park. A breath of fresh air and exercise." Dwicky slipped his arm around Dib's shoulder to guide him from the car and the parking lot onto the grass. "Just take slow, deep breaths, and keep calm. I'm right here." He couldn't help chuckling some. "You did drag me out of bed to come here. You were all excited. So let's go." He urged him on gently.

The plush which Dib had brought with him was suddenly clutched tightly to his chest. "Well, I didn't think there would be so many people." His steps were slow even though Dwicky was trying to urge him along. He let his eyes move away from the kids over to the rest of the park trying to get his nerves back. "It's different thinking about how fun it may be, but then getting here, I suddenly feel scared again." Without realizing it, he cuddled closer to Dwicky. "I don't mean to."

"It's alright." Dwicky ruffled Dib's hair lightly. "Take your time. We can walk along the path there, or just sit on a bench and enjoy the scenery." He looked down at the boy; he was in no particular hurry. "It's up to you. And how much you feel up to."

"I wouldn't mind just walking around." Dib lifted one of his hands up to play with Skeet's antenna. "It may help my leg a bit. I think those pills sort of took all the pain away for now. I hate to think what it will feel like after they wear off." He glanced up and gave a small smile. "I guess I feel up to a little bit. I'm sure after a while I'll feel okay. I got used to it when we went out the last time."

"There you go." Dwicky returned the smile, wide and cheerful, down at Dib. He lead Dib to the cement path that went all around the park. A few people already jogged along it, while a few roller bladers zipped by. "See. This is nice, isn't it? The sun is out, and there are no clouds. It's nice and warm with a pleasant breeze. The park isn't too crowded, and things are calm. You couldn't ask for a nicer day."

Dib had jumped a bit when the bladers went past and he couldn't help but keep his eyes on them. After a few moments he finally turned his eyes back around and loosened his hold on Skeets. "It's not that bad." He used his good foot to kick at a random rock that was on the sidewalk. "I guess I should just enjoy all of this time I have outside." He glanced around once more, but most of the worry was gone from his face. "It's just a normal day."

"Just a normal day." Dwicky repeated in that optimistic tone of his. "Just you and me enjoying a walk in the park." He walked along beside the boy slowly minding Dib's hurt leg. "Like anyone else, just enjoying the weather. Talking about the game, or whatever it is people talk about now-a-days for idle chit-chat." It was nice to get out away from the city; outside, away from stuffy, padded rooms, restraints, and medications. At least out here they were far enough from the city that no one knew them, and they could pretend to be just two people out to enjoy the weather and each others' company. Dwicky glanced around at the people; as sad as it was, they still had to be careful, but Dwicky didn't say anything about it. He wasn't about to dampen such a happy moment after what had just happened.

Dib let his eyes fall back down while he nodded his head to what Dwicky said. "It is nice, especially since it's not raining like last time." He couldn't help the small grin that came to his lips, trying to lift his own mood up. "Not that I really minded the rain all that much." He poked Dwicky in the side before he looked up at the man. "This is better though. No one is in danger of catching a cold, and we can stay out as long as we want." He looked over at a few people that were playing with a dog. "It's been a while since I've been here actually."

Dwicky glanced away and gave a nervous laugh at the reference of the rain. "Yeaa. But the cold was worth it." He gave a small sniffle; at least his cold was getting better. The sleep had really helped. "Oh?" He rubbed the back of his neck and looked to Dib. "When were you last here?" He regarded the boy with a smile.

"It was a really long time ago. Way before I knew you." Dib looked back at Dwicky for only a moment before he quickly looked back down. "It was before I knew Zim too. Just a few years before that when I was only a little younger." He moved a hand up to scratch at his arm, causing his sleeve to crinkle up a bit. "Nothing has really changed all that much. It actually looks the same from what I remember of it." He dropped his hand back on top of Skeets so he could move a finger around one of the little, black eyes. "I think I just got bored of coming here after a while."

"Hmm." Dwicky glanced to the playground. The noisy kids were happily shrieking as they chased each other in some kind of game of tag. "What did you do here?"

Dib gave a small shrug. "I mostly just hung around on the swings. Sometimes I would spy on people and on certain things they were doing, but I got in trouble a lot whenever I tried to." His foot kicked at another rock that was on the path causing it to go much farther than the last one. "Gaz would sometimes come with me, but she would just sit on top of the monkey bars and play games. It would be as if she wasn't even there."

"I would sometimes come here to read and study. Mostly in the summer when the weather was nice. The libraries were always full of bookworms who had no where to go since skool and stuff were out for the summer. So, I came here." Dwicky pointed across from them to a bench near the trees. "Right there actually." He was grinning at the nostalgia. "I fell asleep there once. I was woken up by some hobo who kept poking me with a liquor bottle in the head. Apparently, I had taken over his bed. Creepy experience. Hobos are scary."

Dib couldn't help laughing at least a bit at that. It was a funny image to picture. He tried his best to calm down so he would be able to speak, though there were still a few small giggles under his breath. "They aren't all that bad. I used to know one...er...talk to one. Mostly when I had really bad problems. It's hard to find anyone else that will listen to you when what you want to talk about is aliens, and how you gave your sister pig-like powers." He stopped speaking for a moment and blinked his eyes. After a few seconds, he turned his attention back to Dwicky and gave a sheepish smile. "This isn't helping my insanity issue, is it?"

Dwicky smirked in Dib's direction. "Better to let it all out than in." He patted Dib's shoulder, resting his hand there. "Hobos aren't exactly the best friend material. Especially the smelly ones with tin foil hats on their heads. No, best to go with a saner brand, more in your age group." He chuckled some. "Like those kids." Dwicky pointed to some kids who were sitting at a park bench far across the park. "They look sane and around your age."

Dib looked over to where Dwicky pointed and a small frown quickly formed on his face. "I don't know. It just seems weird for me to suddenly have any friends my age considering it's never really worked out much before." He kept his eyes on the other kids as his curiosity was slowly getting the better of him. "Besides, you don't really know if they're sane. Who knows what they could be over there planning and scheming." Dib almost stopped after those words left his mouth, but instead kept walking at a slower pace. "I'm being paranoid again. I should stop while I'm ahead."

Dwicky tilted his head towards Dib and gave a small smile. "It couldn't hurt to say 'hello'." He gave a little nudge to Dib's middle. "You know you want to. It just isn't _cool _to hang out with your counselor all day. He's _old_ and _aging_." He poked Dib's belly with a small laugh.

Dib squinted one eye as he tried to hide a small smile. "Yeah, yeah." He turned his eyes back to the other kids and the nervous feelings from earlier seemed to come back. "I-I guess it really couldn't hurt. I did want at least some friends." He moved away from Dwicky's arm and turned to face the man. "Fine, I'll go over there, but if anything happens to me, remember that it was your idea." He couldn't help the grin that came to his face.

"I'll be right here." Dwicky smiled softly as he couldn't help smoothing down the boy's hair to look presentable. He pet down the sharp lock of hair that stood up, but in the end it bounced straight back up which amused Dwicky more than anything. "You'll do fine. Just relax, and remember the things I told you." With a decisive sound he rested his hands on Dib's shoulders; the boy was fine, he had to stop nitpicking, there was nothing to be nervous of. "Want me to hold Skeets?" Dwicky smiled with the offer.

Dib had glanced up to watch as Dwicky messed with his hair. After the other was done fussing over him, Dib looked back at Dwicky's face and seemed a little torn at the sudden question. "Umm..." He glanced down at Skeets and clutched the plush a bit tighter before finally handing it over. "Sure. It probably wouldn't be a good idea for me to take it over there with me anyway."

Dwicky took Skeets and held the plush carefully. "Alright." He nodded with a smile, idly wondering who was more nervous- himself or Dib. "Go play nice." He glanced around a quick moment before touching Dib's cheek with a knuckle for a brief second. "Okay." He with drew his hands from Dib, letting the boy go.

Dib gave a weak smile before he finally turned around and started to walk over to the kids at the bench. The entire time his eyes once again looked around the park watching all of the other people go about their day as if he wasn't even there. Little by little the tense, nervous feeling started to go away. Until he finally reached the other kids; that's when it all came back and he felt as if he couldn't speak. When he did, his words were weak and barely heard. "Um...hey."

"Ahh. They grow up so quickly, don't they Skeets." Dwicky wiped an invisible tear as he made the plush nod-nod.

The other kids didn't even seem to hear Dib's quietly voiced salutations, save for one. The boy turned his attention to Dib and narrowed his eyes as if trying to place where he'd seen the other. He elbowed his friend beside him. "Hey someone is 'hey'ing us." Soon all the other kids turned their attention on Dib. "Yeea?" One of them spoke up.

Having so much attention turned on him caused Dib to take a step back. He tried to find any sort of words to answer the kid that had spoken up last, but once more it took awhile for him to actually speak up. It didn't help that he felt like his stomach had just dropped all the way to his feet. "I-I was just wondering... if maybe... I could hang out with you guys."

Skeptical looks were passed all around after Dib spoke. Though none of the kids spoke, it was obvious they weren't impressed with the short, sorry sight in front of them.

"H-HANG?" A pitched voice questioned hard and rudely. Gloved hands slammed against the back of the bench as someone far too sickeningly familiar stomped into Dib's sight from behind the bench. Shock was pasted on his face only to be removed as their green lips peeled back to bare rigid, white teeth locked fiercely in a sneer. "_DIB_? Dib-worm? THE Dib! ALIVE? _OUTSIDE_?"

The silent rejection had been enough for Dib to want to turn around and walk right back over to where he had come from, but the sudden shout stilled his motions. His eyes widened bit by bit at the face that came into his line of vision. Even without the familiar nickname, he knew exactly who was suddenly in front of him. Some form of words were trying to come out of his mouth, but he couldn't make a sound. All he could do was stand there, horrified.

The thin, green figure adorned in that pink striped uniform with those black gloves and boots, unnaturally shiny like slick, black oil, _He_ stood there narrowing his eyes at the gaping Dib. When the boy didn't answer he climbed atop the back of the bench, perching there crouched, ready for a something that wasn't seemingly coming. "Well, this is amusing. Speechless. How fitting." Then it was amusement that pulled itself onto his face. He was enjoying the sight. "Befitting you should cower before me. For I've already won." His grin only grew wider.

Those words only caused Dib's eyes to grow wider if possible. Quick flashes came before his eyes of the horrid nightmare that had caused him so much stress, and suddenly he couldn't stop shaking. "Zim..." The name passed his lips before he even realized it. He quickly looked down. More words came after, just as quiet. "No, you're not real. None of it is real. None of it was real." It had to be the truth at some point.

"Reeeally." Zim's words came out slow and mockingly skeptical. There was a creak of bench and a loud _thud_ that scattered grass and dirt as green and pink landed right in front of Dib.

Invading so much personal space was something that shouldn't have been real, looming so dangerously close into Dib. And so much taller than the boy. That only made the wicked grin on Zim's face grow even sharper in his pleasure.

The sudden boots in his line of vision caused Dib to chance a glance up. In the end he wished he hadn't. The height difference and closeness of the other made Dib take a few shaky steps back. "Y-You're..." He couldn't find the words anymore. All he could do was stare at Zim and try his best to get away from the other. At the very least, get as much space between them as he possibly could. "Get away." The words finally spoken were so hushed it would have been a miracle if they had been heard.

For every small step Dib took, Zim matched it with his own long, lithe steps which kept him so perfectly close. He let Dib take a step back, a feeling of false security, for Zim reached out his thin arm to bridge that gap and tap Dib's forehead with a sharp claw. "Feels real to me." he spoke firmly in Dib's face.

It wasn't the touch that sent Dib over the edge, it was the words. Those same words that had come from that same mouth. "Shut up." Dib raised his arms until his hands were against the sides of his head as his shaking got worse. He made no move to back away from the finger touching him, but still his voice grew louder. "I said get away. Don't touch him. Don't hurt him. Please." His voice was becoming choked despite how strong he was trying to sound. "Please don't let this be real."

The boys on the bench were staring wide-eyed at the two. They glanced at each other before looking back at the boy who was babbling nonsense.

"Man, you're crazy Dib. You've really lost it."  
"And I thought you were nuts in skool. You should be locked back up in the crazy house."

Zim's perplexed look didn't last long. "I'll hurt who I want. Whenever I want." He lashed out a claw and shoved Dib in the chest. "Go back to the nut bar, Dib-worm!" he sneered. "The Earth doesn't need something like you running around with your big, diseased head."

Dib had tried to ignore every word the other boys said, but it just wasn't working. Zim's own words had him looking back at the other as the scared expression became worse. The hands at his head dug into skin when he really didn't mean to, but he didn't notice the pain at all. It was the one shove, the one touch, that caused Dib to stumble back a bit, and give in. "I won't let you." The words were quiet and obviously much too shaky. "I'll stop you. I won't let any of it happen."

Zim scoffed hard, amused at the attempt Dib made. He stepped closer again, looming over Dib and relishing in the supremacy that the change in height gave him. That sadistic grin never left his face; the same from dream to reality, so very much the same. "Really." Zim dragged the rhetorical word out. "Prove it." He bared his vile grin close to Dib's face.

The sudden tiny bit of courage Dib had in that small moment vanished just as quickly at seeing that grin on Zim's face. His nails dug beaded red lines down his face as he stared at the other. Every little thing about the nightmare continued to play before his eyes over and over, and he couldn't help the small sounds that escaped him. It was the last few parts, the things he didn't want to ever remember again which finally had him narrowing his eyes on the taller figure. One of his hands reached out quickly to swipe sharp, bloody nails at Zim's face.

Nails raked deeply across green skin. In their wake they caught against the corner of Zim's eye, painfully yanking the soft, pliable contact lens with it. It landed on the grass at their feet staring unblinkingly at them both. Zim jerked back with a shriek, both hands flying to the wound as he turned away to hold his face. "Y-you--" Zim threw himself back to face Dib, both eyes blazing down with a seething rage at the boy. Pink dripped from the scratches Dib had made, and he glared the hardest with his true-colored eye, so vast and deep; it could only reflect Dib's image back at him. "_DIB_!" Claws grasped the front of Dib's shirt, yanking the boy up those few inches the other had in height.

Dib only had time to stare at that one eye for seconds before he was being lifted up. The hand that had created those scratches pried at Zim's hands, trying to pull them off of him while his one good leg kicked. None of it did any real good. "Let go!" The shout sounded more like a small cry. His other hand tried it's best to swipe at Zim's face much like the other had, trying to catch something or at least push the other away.

"You're no longer a worthy foe." Zim snarled at Dib as the boy struggled. "All this time- it's just made you weak." He almost sounded disappointed in his rage. "I might as well put you out of your misery." He lifted fist to smash into Dib's face, but it stayed, caught in the air, unmoving.

"What the hell is going on here?" Dwicky shouted as he yanked Zim's arm back, using the surprise to tear the green boy's grip off Dib's shirt and pry them apart.

As soon as Dib was free and back on the ground, he looked up at Dwicky with wide, yet fearful eyes. He moved a hand out to grip at Dwicky's shirt as tightly as he could, wishing there was some way he could actually protect the man other than just standing in front of him. "He's going to hurt you. It's just like before. He's going to take you away." The words were rushed and Dib gave a small, terrified look back at Zim as if he would lunge at them at any moment.

Zim had fallen back. Caught by surprise, he stared at the newcomer defending Dib, still clutching one hand over his eye. The other boys who had been gaping on the bench now scrambled off. They had no desire to be a part of the trouble.

"Shh. It's okay, Dib. It's alright." Dwicky tried speaking calmly to Dib who had a death grip on his shirt. He caught sight of the blood, and he put his hands on Dib's cheeks to get the distraught boy to settle down and look at him. "He's just some punk kid. Please, calm down." he tried to keep his voice from shaking.

Zim narrowed one eye as he took a step back. "You-! You look familiar." His gaze settled hard on Dwicky.

The hands on his face caused Dib to calm just a bit, but the words had him shaking his head. "N-No he's not. It's Zim." He pointed behind himself, letting go of Dwicky's shirt for only a quick second, and then returning to cling just as tightly. "It's him. He's right there. It's going to happen again." Zim's words had him trailing off, and despite the other's hands, he once again turned his head around.

"I've seen you before!" Zim jabbed a finger in Dwicky's direction. "But where? Tell Zim-- who are you?" He stepped boldly forward. "How do you know the Dib?"

Dwicky felt his heart lurch into his throat, the blood draining from his face. "N-no. No it's not. C'mon." He didn't waste any time and tore Dib's hands from his shirt to pull the boy away from the scene. He could feel his pulse hammering in his ears, and he closed his eyes for a moment to keep from being sick.

Dib didn't protest at all when he was pulled away from Zim. It meant Dwicky would be safe and everything would be okay. Still, he couldn't help but keep his eyes on Zim as the other shouted loudly at Dwicky. His eyes traveled towards the man and a worried look crossed his face at the expression on Dwicky's.

"C'mon, Zim, let's go!" one of the boy's shouted at Zim as they ran.

Zim hadn't moved, not even as the two fled quickly away from him. His lower eye twitched, the scratches stung. Something was horribly off. He cupped his hands around his mouth "COWARDS!"

Dwicky didn't stop, not as the green boy screamed, not as his own legs buckled, not until he got them to the car. He let out a ragged breath, thudding his butt down to sit on the hood. One hand went to his chest and he could feel his heart beating much too quickly to be healthy, but right now he didn't care. He instantly pulled Dib to him by the boy's wrist, taking Dib's jaw to look over the damage down. "..Damnit."

The loud insult caused Dib to flinch. He tried his best to bow his head. When they got to the car he allowed Dwicky to pull him forward, a bit limp as the man moved his head around. The scratches stung and had started to bleed, but he still took no real notice of them. He didn't speak up for the moment and just allowed Dwicky to look him over, too afraid to really speak up at all.

Dwicky let out a ragged breath. Somewhere his exhale hitched, but it was let out slow and heavy. He dug into his pockets and pulled out tissues he had brought along because of his cold. He placed them on either side of Dib's face over the scratches. It was easy to feel the tremble in the man's touch. "I'm sorry, Dib.. I'm so sorry." Dwicky sniffed wetly, his cold getting the better of him. His voice shook, and nothing seemed to still it "I didn't-.. I'm sorry."

Dib's eyes closed tightly when the tissue was pressed against the scratches. He let out a small whimper, and after a few moments opened his eyes to look at Dwicky before he looked down. Everything that just happened ran through his head over and over, but that one colored eye stuck out the most. He couldn't help but give out another small sound. "I don't know what to believe anymore..." The words were mumbled and frightened.

Dwicky let out a soft, choked noise. He wanted to say something, to have all the answers, but right now his mind just blanked out. It was that teetering moment on a fence where lies and honesty rocked back and forth; where all of it could just be blurted out, or everything could go to that picture perfect ideal _normal_ that he tried so hard to make for Dib.

But Dwicky couldn't do it. No words would pass through his tight throat, and all he could do was pull Dib against him, hold him tightly and hope that was enough. He didn't care if blood smeared against his rumpled, white shirt, or who saw him bury his face so intimately against Dib's hair; he just didn't care right now. "I'm sorry." he whispered, though muffled against the top of Dib's head. "I'm sorry, Dib. Please.. believe me when I say things will be alright. Believe things will be okay. That's enough, right?"

Very slowly, Dib lifted his hands up to grip at Dwicky's shirt. Not half as hard as he usually did, though. "I don't know." The words were still just as quiet and muffled against Dwicky's shirt. "It doesn't seem like it's been enough so far." Despite the words, Dib still tried his best to bury his head into Dwicky's shirt. The pain from the wounds was ignored so he could have some form of comfort, as little as it was.

Dwicky felt a large part of himself break at those words. He was at a loss, and his heart sank. He rubbed Dib's back, but already he felt so defeated. They had come crawling from a battle that felt they had won only to receive worse scars from something so quick and small. Just as quickly as Dwicky had come unraveled, he stitched himself back together. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand before sucking in a hard breath. "C'mon. Let's go home and fix you up." He leaned back enough so he could better fix the tissue on Dib's face. "We're getting blood everywhere."

Dib pulled his hands away and glanced up at Dwicky's face for a few seconds before he looked down at the bloody mess he had made of the other's shirt. Such a thing caused him to look away and avert his eyes to the ground. One of his hands moved up to rub at his face as if the wounds weren't even there. "Where's Skeets?"

Dwicky was almost startled by the question. He had to press his lips together into a thin line not to frown. "H-here." He reached behind himself, having tucked the plush partly into his pants when he went to break up the fight. He handed the plush to the boy. "Keep your hands on the tissue.. until we get home." Dwicky took tissue from his pocket to wipe away the excess while putting more on Dib's face for him to hold.

Dib had taken Skeets as soon as the plush was handed over, clutching it tightly to his chest as if it were his last life line. He gave a small flinch as Dwicky cleaned up his wounds once again, but did as he was told. His free hand moved to try and keep the tissue in place. Once that was done, he didn't speak another word. Instead, he moved away from the hood and over to the passenger side, moving Skeets so he could let himself inside the car.

Dwicky was zoned out, but he got in the car, shut the door, and buckled his seat belt automatically. Inside he found himself gazing at the steering wheel with his hands at ten 'o clock and two, just staring as if he didn't know how to work anything. He felt tired, far more exhausted than he had coming from the asylum yesterday; in such a small moment, his entire energy felt drained away. He found himself looking to Dib. He didn't want to lose the boy, but things only seemed to get worse so soon after they looked to be improving.

With a shaking hand Dwicky started the car and backed out.


	21. Sessions 21

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 21

The apartment door opened slower than usual, but Dib either didn't seem to notice or care since his steps were just as slow. His eyes were glued to the floor as he walked straight into the living room. One hand idly messed with Skeets as it held the plush in some strange form of comfort. He hadn't said a word the whole car ride, and just stared out of the passenger side window. It seemed as if at that moment he was still giving the same treatment.

The tissue Dib still held had become bloodied up and bordered on useless. He continued to hold it in place though, not really noticing how bad it had become. Too much was on his mind to really care. When he finally stopped in the middle of the living room, he kept half-lidded eyes on his feet. Even though his eyes were staring, his mind was somewhere else completely.

"Sit." Dwicky softly spoke for the first time since the car ride. He put his hands on the boy's shoulders and gently pushed the boy down; the boy was so languid, it scared him. "I'll be right back." He smoothed Dib's hair back, wishing so badly that the boy would acknowledge him, but no noise or motion was given. It was just a short walk to the bathroom; nothing would happen in those few seconds. That didn't stop Dwicky's heart from hammering in his chest as he quickly grabbed the first aid supplies and hurried back. Of course, there was no change.

Dwicky knelt in front of Dib. With shaking hands he gently pulled Dib's hand from his face to remove the tissue. Carefully, he began to clean the wound with a damp cloth; bits of tissue stuck to the wound, but he tried his hardest to be gentle in the motions. At least one side wasn't as bad as the other. "I-..I messed up." he started, his voice so shaky, but he couldn't stand the silence between them. "I didn't know he'd be there. I should have gone with you.. It was too soon. Too soon since yesterday." He paused to look at Dib's face.

Even with how gentle Dwicky tried to be, each touch still caused Dib to tense up. The man's words seemed to go in one ear and out the other considering how long Dib kept his eyes down, never once speaking a word back. His hand tightened just a bit on Skeets though, and his other free hand laid down to rest on the couch. "You know it was him, right?" The words finally came out, but Dib still refused to lift his eyes, too afraid of the answer he would get. "You saw what I saw, right?" Once again that one eye haunted his vision, and he tried to shut his eyes tightly to it.

Dwicky dug his teeth into his bottom lip, pressing them together as he set the bloody cloth aside after drying the marks as best he could. "S-saw" he went to dabbing disinfectant on the scratches "-saw what, Dib?" He tore open some large bandages, the sound so loud and offending that Dwicky cringed. Quickly, he placed it on the worst side before opening another.

Dib's eyes opened up at Dwicky's words, and even though the wounds still stung, his attention was only on Dwicky. His mouth opened and closed for a few moments before he finally looked back down and tried his best to shake his head. "Nothing, never mind." He gripped Skeets tighter after the words left him.

Dwicky felt his heart in his throat again, still and aching. When the boy looked away again, it fell past his stomach. "I'll... I'll be right back again." He brushed a few strands of hair on Dib's forehead before he turned to grab the kit. He stood and returned it to the bathroom, tossing the wrappers in the garbage. With a grunt, he yanked off his shirt and tossed it too into the bin. Washing his hands in the sink, he rubbed his face with wet cold hands, raking them through his hair. He grimaced at his reflection, tired and guilty. Quickly, he left to return to Dib, not bothering to slip on a new shirt.

Dwicky didn't speak a word as he knelt in front of Dib. He was at such a loss; all he could do was lay his head on Dib's lap, the rest of him slumping over.

Dib didn't react at first to having the other body against him. His body continued to stay only slightly tense and unmoving. After a few moments, his hand finally lifted from the couch to lay on the back of Dwicky's head. His fingers just barely made any movement through the man's hair as his hand simply rested there. "He said things." The words were almost too quiet. "He said things just like he did in the dream, and I was so afraid."

Dwicky's arms raised to slip around Dib's small waist; he found himself clinging to the small body. "I'm sorry.. It was just a dream. I didn't know he'd be there. I came as fast as I could. I-I didn't know." his voice finally broke and he buried his face against Dib's leg; he knew it wasn't helping, but he just needed a little comfort for his own.

Dib finally started to move his hand as Dwicky clung to him. His hand ran up and down the man's head while his fingers continued to play with a few strands of hair. "I scratched him." They were just three simple words, but a small noise came from him before he went on. "I saw his eye. It wasn't normal at all. It was just like I remembered it." He leaned down so that he could rest a cheek on top of Dwicky's head. His hand moved down to rest on the man's back. "If I'm not supposed to believe, then what am I supposed to think about that?"

Dwicky moved his head so he could be heard. Hhis cheek nuzzled Dib's leg. "Anything, it could have been anything. A contact lens. Pink eye. A birth defect. Everything happened so quickly. You probably hurt his eye, that's probably it." He swallowed hard and it only had him gripping at the back of Dib's shirt tighter. "But, why," His voice lost all its strength and for a moment it cracked, "Why did you hurt yourself, Dib?" It was just like when he had left Dib alone in the cell, just a moment alone with his sleeves undone; they were the same kind of self-made scratches. It made such a heavy feeling settle inside Dwicky's chest.

"Pink eye." The same excuse from that day so long ago. It caused Dib to keep silent despite the question he was asked. He blinked his eyes a few times and let his fingers trace small patterns on Dwicky's back. "I didn't know if it was real. I didn't know if it was really happening. I was able to move, so I thought maybe if I could feel, everything would be okay." A small, choked sound came from his own body. "If I did it, he would go away. If it was a nightmare, everything would go back to normal."

Dwicky let out a ragged breath and he shook his head under Dib's. "Most people just pinch themselves. Lightly." It was a weak attempt at lightening the mood, but his chuckle sounded more sad than anything. "Dib," he started out carefully, taking a small, wet sniff, "Zim isn't an alien, but he's still real. He's a person, like me, like you. A messed up person, but he's going to be out there. And you may have dreamed about him, but you have to remember what is and isn't a dream when you see him. Avoid him if you have to, but don't hurt yourself.. not like that, not to help clear your mind." He scootched closer to Dib, curling closer to the boy on the couch.

Dib seemed to listen to the words since he gave only a slow nod. After a while though, his hand, which had been moving, finally stopped and kept still. "You..." He hesitated on the word and stopped right after it left his mouth. Once more, he stayed silent until he tried again. "You really thought that when you first saw him? The very first time you saw him?" Bit by bit his words became muffled against Dwicky's hair as his own questions made him nervous. "Or, was Zim in on it too?"

Dwicky sniffled and he paused a moment to rub his nose. "I- I dunno." It was hard to think clearly, to organize his thoughts. "I.. I thought he was. I.. I dunno. I don't remember. It was awhile back." He slipped his arm back around the boy.

Dib blinked his eyes and slowly lifted his head after a few moments to look down at Dwicky. A small hurt look came over his face, but he didn't speak up. Instead, he withdrew his hand so he could clutch at Skeets more tightly and buried his face into the plush. The whole situation was starting to finally get to him, and he could finally feel tears pricking at his eyes, but he didn't dare let them show.

Dwicky raised his head from Dib's lap, even though it felt far too heavy to keep up. He drew his hand back and rubbed the side of Dib's leg, wanting to comfort. He didn't stop Dib from crying, it wasn't good to keep any of this in; it would only tear into Dib more. Dwicky swallowed hard, wanting to say something, but nothing would come out. At least nothing Dib would need to hear; nothing that would make anything better, or change anything.

Dwicky leaned forward and placed a small kiss on Dib's clutching hand. "I just want to help you." he quietly spoke. That's all he ever wanted.

Those few words finally caused the tears to fall, as hard as Dib tried to stop them. Each bit of wetness that rolled down his cheeks soaked into Skeets, causing the red to become a darker shade. "I don't know what to think." His words were stuttered, but still coherent as he spoke. "It's not real, right? Then why do these things happen?" He shut his eyes tightly, trying to make the tears go away.

"Life is tough." was all that Dwicky could come up with, spoken so softly against Dib's hand. "I wish it wasn't, but it is. I'm trying to make it more bearable. I'm trying to make things better." He pressed his lips to Dib's knuckles, one after the other. He drew his lips down to the boy's ring finger and whispered there. ".. I love you."

The three small words had Dib opening his eyes back up to look at Dwicky, even though the tears blurred his vision. The hand that was held twitched weakly. Without realizing it, a quiet sound escaped him, and he didn't try to cover it up. "I love you too..." His eyes dropped down to look at both of their hands while he couldn't help but sniffle. "Part of me still wants to believe, ya know? After seeing so much, I can't help it."

"I know." Dwicky quietly answered, nodding slowly. "I know. It's understandable, but look what it's done, and where it's gotten you." He brushed away the warm tears from the boy's cheek. "You just have to remember why they aren't real. Keep reminding yourself that, like we talked about before on the couch, okay?" He drew away from Dib so he could rise and sit with him on the chair, properly wrapping his arms around the small figure. "Can you do that?"

As soon as Dwicky was next to him, Dib immediately curled up against the taller body. He only gave a tiny nod in response to Dwicky's question as he tried his best to bury himself against the man's chest. Once he was still, he finally spoke up. "I'll try. I hate feeling like this." His eyes closed halfway as he tried his best to relax. "I don't want to worry anymore."

Dwicky drew his legs up from the floor so he could curl around the small body, giving sanctuary and comfort, snug on the end of the couch. "I know. I know." he repeated himself quietly, resting his chin atop Dib's head. "You try, and keep on trying. No one can say you haven't. It's hard, but you're doing okay." He pressed his lips together, rubbing them in silent anxiety as he stared across the room at nothing. With a loud sigh he looked down at Dib, seeing the tightly curled fists with bloody nails. This had to stop, and there was a minute solution in an ocean of many.

Dwicky took one of Dib's hands, curling his own around it as he looked at the overgrown nails with flecks of skin and blood firmly embedded under them. He raised the boy's hand to kiss the back of fingers. Pressing his lips to Dib's head he murmured there "... Can you wait another quick second?"

Dib moved his fingers as they were kissed. Not once did he move his head to look up at Dwicky as the question was asked, afraid to break away from the small bit of comfort he had for the moment. "I guess so." He clutched Skeets against him, staying silent for a couple of seconds before he corrected himself. "I mean, yeah, I can." His body seemed to tense up a bit as the next question left his mouth. "Where are you going?"

Fingers ran through Dib's hair once before a quick kiss was made. "Just quickly grabbing something from the bathroom." Dwicky unraveled himself from Dib and stood. "Just a quick second. I promise." He begrudgingly took his hands back so he could head to the bathroom again. He dug through the drawers before he found what he wanted. He returned to sit beside Dib with a new, moist cloth and nail clippers in hand. "Here. Lean against me and give me one hand."

Dib shifted around a bit so he could settle himself against Dwicky better. He looked at what the other had before relaxing completely and holding out his free hand. "They're okay. They aren't that bad." He sounded unsure of his own words as he said them, and tried to bury his face against Skeets as he went on. "You don't have to."

Dwicky rested his head on top of Dib's and took the boy's hand, cleaning the mess of skin and blood underneath each fingernail first. "You have longer nails than most of the girls I've seen. Besides," He didn't mean to trail off so worriedly. ".. this'll help. In a small way." It would protect Dib from hurting himself most of all, but Dwicky didn't voice that aloud.

Dib couldn't help but keep his eyes on his hand as it was cleaned. Some of that blood wasn't his own. Just the thought caused his eyes to widen as he went back to what he had done to Zim. As bit by bit was wiped away, he tried to relax again and let go of the death grip he had on Skeets, even though his fingers still twitched. "I just got used to how they are. I rarely see them anyway."

"This won't hurt. It's.. just a precaution. You'll be fine." Dwicky set the cloth aside. Picking up the clippers, he took Dib's thumb and clipped the nail short, as short as he could without hurting the boy. It took all that Dwicky had to keep his hand from shaking while doing it. He had to force away the worry of what he was going to tell the hospital about the new scratches on Dib's face; exactly the same as the other ones. The doctors would question it, him and his reliability, his practice; Monday was going to be Hell: in every literary form of the word. But Dwicky tried to push it all away, and concentrated on being as gentle as he could. "See? It probably feels better too." Dwicky tried to preoccupy Dib with some optimism.

At first, Dib had flinched with the clip out of reflex. Dwicky's words slowly had him calming down and leaning a bit more against the man. He wiggled the couple of fingers that had just been clipped and gave a tiny smile. "It does feel a little better." He wiggled his fingers a bit more before he turned his eyes on the nails Dwicky still had to clip. "Dwicky, are you upset with me for what happened?" The words came a few seconds later. "At all?"

Dwicky couldn't keep the frown off his face; he couldn't lie. He clipped one finger in silence, as if it needed all of his attention, but finally he spoke up. "... I am." He paused in his clipping before he spoke again, continuing on with both. "... I'm disappointed." He added quietly "With myself as well. I expected too much too soon. But at the same time, I didn't expect history to repeat itself."

Dib's gaze dropped after Dwicky spoke, and he tried his best to bury his face into Skeets as much as he could. "Oh..." His eyes narrowed a bit as he went over the last few things Dwicky said. "Repeat itself?" Dib tried to shake his head, but he really didn't even have the energy to do that. "Nothing is repeating itself."

Dwicky didn't answer right away. "...In the hospital you scratched yourself in much the same way." he spoke very quietly; he was at fault, and he wasn't proud of it. "At least since then, there have been improvements, but.. this I didn't expect to happen again." He finally finished. He ran his own fingers over Dib's before setting the boy's hand down, as well as the clippers. He began to clean the fingernails on the other hand.

As soon as his hand was let go, he returned to clutching Skeets. That time in the asylum seemed like so long ago; he had almost forgotten it happened. It was so easy to forget considering so much had happened since then. "I didn't mean to." His voice had become shaky again, but he tried his best to calm it. "I didn't know what was real. It was so hard to tell. I just wanted him to go away." He closed his eyes hoping that would calm his nerves at least a bit. "I told you that."

"I know," Dwicky quietly answered. "...I believe you." He paused to press a lingering kiss to the top of the boy's head, sighing into the dark hair. "But please, _please_.. don't ever do this again, Dib." He shut his eyes for a long moment before picking up the nail clippers to resume trimming Dib's nails.

Dib slowly opened his eyes up after he heard the sound of the clippers. He couldn't help watching the process while trying to keep his mind off of things, at least for the time being. It wasn't working though. One thing was nagging at him, and he had to voice it out even if he didn't get any sort of answer. "He said he would hurt whoever he wanted." He tried to muffle his words against Skeets. "Whenever he wanted."

Dwicky continued to clip away, making sure they stayed on the washcloth. He swallowed hard, and he was sure his heart pounded harder, but at least Dib wouldn't see his hyper anxiety. "Empty threats. He's just some stupid boy who wants to rile you up. He knows what to say to push your buttons. Having been away so long, I'm sure everything must have seemed ten times worse than it really was." Dwicky felt ill hearing himself speak so perfectly normal, every last word.

Dib thought over those words, and in the end, gave a small nod. "I'm afraid to see him again. Whether it's nightmares or not, I'm just afraid." He shifted around a bit so he could lay against Dwicky better while the man kept hold of his hand. "What if I never get over that fear? I can't avoid him forever, right?" He let out a harsh sigh. "Though I wish I could."

"You could move." Dwicky found his quiet laughter too forced. "But, really, you can't run from your fear. Don't smash into it head first, just realize that it is there and that life has to go on whether you feel it or not. Bravery isn't the absence of fear, it's the ability to make decisions and follow through with them while feeling it." He gave a terribly weak smile. "I know.. easier said than done." He gave a heavy-hearted sigh, rustling Dib's hair as he moved his head to place a kiss on it. "...I'm sorry.."

Once again Dib tried to shake his head as best he could. "You shouldn't be saying sorry. You've been helping me, right? I'm the one that just can't seem to do any of this." The words that came from his own mouth caused his body to slump a bit more against Dwicky. "I guess in a way that means I should be saying sorry. I told you I would try, but I saw him once and I didn't really try at all." His voice grew quieter. "I'm sorry."

Dwicky finally finished with clipping Dib's pinky, making a pleased noise at his accomplishment. He reached over, putting everything on the table beside them for the moment. He wrapped his arms around the boy, finally having his hands free. "It's alright." He took each of Dib's hands in his own and rubbed the boy's fingers. "There? How's that feel? Better? Now scratching won't be such a problem." He hoped.

Dib gazed at his hands for a long time before a tiny smile tried to come over his face. "It does feel better. Thank you." Once of his hands turned over so he could link his fingers with Dwicky's own. For a few moments he stayed silent as he tried to get his thoughts in over. Finally, he brought their hands closer, along with Skeets, and spoke up once more. "What if I really do try to face my fear, but I just continue to become scared? Does that mean I really won't get out? I'll just have this, these small visits?"

"No. No, of course not. Some fears are best left alone. People who are afraid of heights shouldn't suddenly jump out of planes, and people with fears of hippopotami shouldn't suddenly stick their head in a hippo's mouth. The only thing that matters is that you don't let the fear stop you from your progress. That's all. That's it." Dwicky gave Dib a small squeeze. "That's all there is to it. The world spins around whether we're afraid or not. It helps to put things in perspective like that."

"I guess so." Dib kept his eyes down for a bit longer. He finally tried to turn his gaze as best he could towards Dwicky. At best, he was only able to see the other out the corner of his eyes. "Have you ever been really afraid of anything? Have you ever been just as afraid as I feel right now about anything at all?" He let his eyes fall back down. "Even if it's something really small?"

Dwicky nodded against Dib's head. "Of course. Everyone has.. one time or another." He rested his brow against the boy's head. "It happens."

Dib gave a small sound and slowly closed his eyes. "What was it that scared you? Was it something you were able to forget?" He squeezed Dwicky's hand after he asked the question. "Or are still scared of it sometimes?"

Dwicky smiled sadly against Dib's hair. "There are some things, yes. I'm still scared sometimes. That's natural. But, Dib, sometimes not talking about it, not thinking about it helps. I'm not saying suppress the fear, or memory.. just.. don't think about it. There are much more important things to be doing than worrying, or fearing when it's going to happen next." He sighed softly, knowing he didn't answer Dib's question. Talking about fear helped one get over fear better, and Dib was looking for an example to go by. Dwicky knew this, but he was dreading this topic entirely and just wanted it gone. "Heh. I've had a lot of fears. I was a rather..._anxious_ child growing up. Though," he gave a slight chuckle, "I was more anxious once I was grown up. There was this one time though, I was about oh much, much younger than you. I was afraid of the boogieman. And I mean breaking out in a sweat, hiding under the covers, praying for morning kind of afraid. I'd sneak into my parents bed to sleep," Dwicky cleared his throat and shifted his gaze away, "much to their chagrin," he added quickly. "But I realized after a while that I had to get over this fear, or grow up being 'that poor, sad, freaky kid who always wants the light on'. So what I did was completely clean out my closet and under my bed. I found more freaky things in there than boogiemen, I can tell you. Two-year-old apple cores, a collection of chewed gum that had gone fuzzy, and smelly socks. Uck." Dwicky made a face. "Once all the junk had been hauled out, giving the boogieman no place to hide, I went to bed that night and realized that the junk in my closet was the thing that gave the illusion of scary shadows and shapes, and the laundry under my bed looked like lurky lumps underneath. Of course my parents weren't the happiest that all my stuff was suddenly stored in the garage, and that I would avoid going in there at all costs-- but my problem was solved! And really, it can be as simple as just shrugging off some old junk."

Dib seemed a little grossed out by a few things Dwicky said, but by the end, his worried expression came back. "I don't know. Getting rid of junk is easy, but trying to ignore someone seems different. Especially if you've fought with that person day in and day out for what now seems like such a stupid reason, I guess." He brought their hands away from his body and held them up in front of them. "I hate to think that maybe we'll fall back into that routine just because I was so used to it."

"That's why you go to a different skool when you start. If need be, maybe your family could move to another city.. or something. Avoid the problem altogether." Dwicky rested his head down on Dib's shoulder. "I'm sure your father will understand." He wouldn't. The professor wouldn't bat an eye to the problem, not without absolute results; maybe that would be enough. But with what Gaz and that _Tak_ did, nothing felt solvable anymore. And despite having slept well, Dwicky still felt completely exhausted and drained.

Dib dropped their hands at those two suggestions and gave a small sound. "I couldn't." He shook his head a few times before actually going on. "If I did that, then I wouldn't be able to see you again. What if I moved somewhere far away from here?" He turned his head so he could stare at Dwicky with worried eyes. "I'd rather deal with Zim."

Dwicky looked sadly back at Dib. A weak smile soon spread to his face. He drew his fingers across Dib's forehead, brushing back the dark hair that fell there. This relationship couldn't be healthy either. "... Anything to help you get better, and get out." he answered quietly.

Dib's expression grew worse and he looked back down despite the other's hand near his face. He opened his mouth a bit, but just as quickly he closed it, staying silent. The tight hold he had on Dwicky's hand loosened and instead he gripped Skeets closer.

Dwicky's brow furrowed and he shook his head. "No, Dib, I didn't mean it like that." He brushed a thumb across Dib's cheek, minding the bandage near the sides of the boy's face. "I'd do anything to help you. There's little I wouldn't do.. I'm really trying." He sighed heavily, dusting his fingers across the boy's cheek. "I want to stay with you, all the time, but.. I can't always. There's going to be times, like today, that happen when I won't be there. I'm trying, but I'm only human.. You have to try too, Dib. I know you're strong, I know you're brave, and I know you're very scared right now, but you have to do what's right for you." He went on quietly, directly taking Dib's gaze with his own "You have to be willing to do whatever it takes." His hand twined with Dib's, gripping the other's tighter.

Dib tried to blink away the tears that were blurring his vision once again. His hand that clutched Skeets let go for a small second so he could wipe away the wetness that just wouldn't go away on it's own. "I'm sorry." The words came from him again as he dropped his hand back down. He looked away despite the fact that Dwicky held his head in place. "I'm probably being a really big problem right now." He gave a tiny smile, but it was forced, so it quickly fell away. "I'll try my best not to let what happened today happen again. I promise." He looked back at Dwicky. "I really will try."

Dwicky gave a small nod, accepting the apology and agreeing, "That's all I ask." He pressed a quick kiss to Dib's lips.

The one kiss caused Dib to relax. He tried his best to smile again, managing a small twitch of lips. After a few seconds, he moved forward to press his own small kiss against Dwicky's lips, pulling back so he could speak. "Thank you for helping me." He averted his eyes as he kept speaking. "For all of this and everything." He looked back at Dwicky's eyes while raising his hand to play with the man's hair. "Even if I mess up, you still know how to help me."

Dwicky finally smiled, feeling well enough to do so between the twinges of guilt that had sewed itself into the lining of his stomach. "Thank you." He bowed his head a little, eased by the fingers that fiddled with his hair. He finally rested his head on Dib's shoulder, although not without placing a kiss on the boy's cheek first. He nuzzled Dib's shoulder, even though the worry still weighed on his shoulders. The boy was finally looking more relaxed, and that's what really mattered.

Dib continued to move his fingers slowly through Dwicky's hair. After a few seconds, he laid his head on top of the other's and let his eyes slip halfway closed. His hand fell to the back of Dwicky's neck and his fingers curled there instead. "I'll be okay. You don't have to worry." His fingers moved up and down Dwicky's neck, and after a few seconds his eyes closed the rest of the way. He tried to relax completely against the other.

Dwicky softly ran his hand up and down the side of Dib's thigh in a comforting manner. "We'll do something really nice when you get out." he spoke softly against Dib's shoulder. "Have a big party or something to celebrate here.. You can invite some new friends from skool over. Something small, but still nice. Lots of cola, lots of junk food." He smiled a little against Dib's shoulder. "Rent a movie, maybe music, keep my hands off you." He chuckled quietly as he playfully bit Dib's shirt.

The last words caused a small smile to form on Dib's face. "I like when your hands are on me." He nuzzled his face against Dwicky's hair which caused his next words to be muffled. "Otherwise, I would like all of that. It really is something to look forward to. To think that one day I actually will get out, and that I will actually have friends makes me feel better." He unclasped their hands only to squeeze them together once again. "And that I'll be able to be around you more."

"Well then, during the party sometime we'll just have to sneak off to the bedroom." Dwicky moved his head just enough to press a playful kiss to the side of Dib's neck. "Where I can keep my hands on you." He pressed another kiss again. "At all times." He ran his hand again up Dib's thigh, slipping under the hoodie and along the boy's side, giving a small tickle with fingers. "Where ever you want."

Dib tensed up at the sensation and couldn't help the tiny laugh that came from him. One eye opened back up as he stared at Dwicky. Much of the worry was gone from his face for the moment, and he seemed at least a little playful. "Anywhere I want?" His smile grew just a bit. "Do you think we would ever make it back to the party?"

"Hmm. Well, I couldn't keep the star of the party for too long, could I." Dwicky chuckled. "Maybe a small kiss here or there. Completely innocent, of course." He nipped softly at Dib's neck, tugging the boy nearer with his one free hand. "Of course, one kiss turns to two kisses turns to a whole lot of kisses when it comes to you, I've learned." Dwicky mused.

Dib let out a small sound and cuddled closer to Dwicky with no protest at all. "It's because you can't resist me, that's all." His hand moved lower along Dwicky's back and suddenly he frowned when he found he couldn't scratch like he used to. "No fair, you took away my fun."

Dwicky tried not to laugh at poor Dib's woe. "Sorry." Instead he kissed the corner of the boy's lips with a slight grin. "Guess you'll have to be creative and find something new."

Despite the kiss, Dib still pouted. After a few moments, he slowly got over it as he brought his hand back up to Dwicky's ear to play with the man's piercing. "I could always bite you." He couldn't help the playful grin that came to his own lips. "Would you rather I do that?" His expression turned thoughtful for a moment. "I have to warn you though; most people aren't too fond of it."

Dwicky pursed his lips a moment. He recalled Dib mentioning a while back that he'd bitten the hospital's orderlies for not cutting his hair just right. "Well.. you did bite me in the kitchen a few days ago." He couldn't help the lazy smirk, warmly leaning against the boy as his earring was played with. "That wasn't so bad. Really, I'll take anything you give." His grin grew wider, and he pressed a playful kiss to Dib's ear.

Dib leaned into the small kiss and the smile returned to his face. "That was just a love bite." He turned his eyes back on Dwicky. His fingers ran up the rim of the man's ear lightly before tracing right back down to move in a circle around the stud. "I could give you plenty more if you really did want them." He moved just a bit so he could lean down and nip gently at Dwicky's neck for a quick second. "Like that." He did it once again, his teeth biting just a bit harder the next time before he pulled back again to look at the other. "Or that."

Dwicky softly groaned, his head tilting lower at every small thing. "Last time you attacked my neck, you gave me a hickey." He couldn't help but laugh. "Makes a very good impression with the doctors. Had to keep my collar up, remember? Mm. Soon, I'll get you pay back for all the scratching, biting and bruising. Soon, I'll have the liberty to do the same back." Both hands slipped under Dib's shirt to run up and down skin, softly drawing with his nails, although not enough to mar. "And it will be good." His head finally thudded lightly on Dib's, unable to keep up on its own.

Dib couldn't help but grin against Dwicky's skin. "I can't wait for that time, but for now, I get to continue doing whatever I like to you." After those words were said, he let his teeth drag along the other's throat softly before licking back down. He spoke once more, "I don't have to be careful because no one is checking over you." He made his way to Dwicky's shoulder, and didn't waste any time in biting down.

Dwicky muffled his loud, throaty noise against the fabric on Dib's shoulder, biting on the hood itself. He grasped his hands higher along Dib's bare back before dragging them down and wrapping his arms around to keep the boy close. "Mmf. Lucky me." he smirked weakly.

Dib kept his mouth exactly where it was, biting down just a bit harder after Dwicky spoke. Every few seconds his tongue darted out to lick at the skin where his teeth were not. Finally, he pulled away and licked at the abused skin. His tongue jabbed the sensitive place on purpose a few times before turning gentle once again.

Dwicky's groan turned into a whimper of disappointment low in his throat. "Damnit. It sucks not being able to bite back." One hand slid around to rub up and down Dib's chest slowly. "Or scratch. I can only lick you in appropriate places." He lifted his head to find Dib's mouth, giving the boy's lips a flick of tongue before kissing him. "Which really isn't fair, I think." He kissed the boy's cheek. "But patience. You'll be out soon." He kissed Dib's jaw. "And we won't have to worry as much." He kissed the side of Dib's neck, sliding his lips down to the front of the boy's throat where he lapped at the small Adam's apple there.

The small lick to his lips caused Dib to close his eyes for a quick second until he felt lips on his cheek. After that, he kept his eyes on Dwicky for a bit before he finally spoke up, a small grin on his lips. "It's not fair, you're right." He moved his hand so that he could trace the mark he had made on the man's shoulder, being as gentle as he could, all while letting out small moans at the sudden attention given to his neck and throat. "So, does that mean you want to lick me in inappropriate places?" His grin grew just a bit wider.

Dib could feel Dwicky's own grin against his neck. "I'd get in trouble if I answered that honestly." He moved to softly kiss the soft bit of skin below Dib's ear. "So I guess I'll be as good as I can.. for now." He very gently bit the rim of the boy's ear, sucking on it with a lick here or there.

Dib let out a small humming noise and allowed his eyes to slip close once again. He tried his best to dig into skin, forgetting to be gentle in that moment. "You can't get in trouble if we're the only ones around to hear what you say." He let out another small noise as his ear was sucked. He tried his best to curl closer to the taller body.

Dwicky let go of Dib's ear and ran his tongue along the rim a few times before he pursed his lips and softly blew cool air against the wet skin. He then pressed a grin against the boy's ear, slipping arms around to hug the other once more. "Don't tempt me. Once started.. I may never want to stop." He gave a dramatic sigh. "And unfortunately, that's a bad thing."

The small bit of air caused a shiver to run through Dib's body even as he was pulled closer. It took him a moment to actually recover and finally open his eyes back up. As soon as he did, he took no time in moving his tongue out to lick across Dwicky's chest in one, quick motion before speaking up in a small voice. "It's not a bad thing at all."

"Ughnn." Dwicky's eyes fluttered shut for a moment. "Keep doing that and it will be." He grinned lazily, resting his head atop Dib's.

That response caused the playful look to return to Dib's face. Despite the warning, he let his tongue move once more across Dwicky's chest, but not quite as quickly. The motion was much slower than before, and he let his tongue travel up until he was forced to stop. That only caused him to lick right back down. He just barely sucked at skin before he finally pulled away and raised his eyes a bit to glance up at the other. "Really?"

Dwicky sucked in a sharp breath and kept it in. He kept his eyes closed and his brows furrowed; it was easy to tell he was battling some internal conflict. He was losing badly. "Hmm..mm. Y-yea." He ran his fingers through Dib's hair, and buried them there in the dark mess. "You shouldn't do that." He smirked weakly.

Dib's grin became much too wicked. "But I like doing this." Just to prove his point, he let his tongue move back out. He ran a small wet trail up once more before moving it in small circles here and there. When he tired of that, he bit lightly at the wet trails, his teeth giving small nips all the way back down to where he started. "And you like when I do it." He had pulled back once again just to speak and turned his eyes back on Dwicky.

Dwicky didn't have a witty response for Dib, not when he was trying to keep his hands in chaste places on the boy. He let out a very audible, breathy sigh; his chest heaved quite noticeably. All he did was stare back at Dib with heavily-lidded eyes. "You.." he started out with a husky note to his voice, "are very, very, _very_ wicked, my young friend. It's not nice to tease." He frowned with disappointment at being able to do nothing.

Dib shifted just a bit so he was face to face with Dwicky, the small grin never leaving his face. "It serves you right." He leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss against the other's lips, but didn't pull back until after he sucked on Dwicky's bottom lip for a few seconds. "All of the teasing you did to me. It's pay back." One hand moved up just a bit so a finger could run along the wet trails he had made on Dwicky's chest.

Dwicky full on pouted, darting his tongue out a moment to lick Dib's lips when the boy kissed him. "Horrible. I'm a horrible influence then." He raised a hand to brush fingers down the boy's jaw where he firmly took the boy's chin so he could give Dib a proper kiss of affection. When he pulled back he exhaled heavily, but still smiled weakly. "Just a little longer, okay?"

Dib opened his eyes after the kiss and kept his gaze on Dwicky after the man spoke. His fingers kept their place on the other's chest as he slowly nodded his head, but after a few seconds they fell away. He couldn't help still, leaning forward to lick once more at Dwicky's lips before he took another kiss despite how shaky the situation already was.

Dwicky made a soft noise, letting the kiss linger before pulling away. He softly stroked Dib's chin with his thumb and smiled weakly once again. "We're doing alright. We're okay, and it can only get better, right?" He smiled a little more. "We'll just have to work extra hard to make up for all the setbacks we've had." He brushed his thumb across so he could cup the side of the boy's face, minding the bandages. "Okay?"

Dib leaned his head into the touch. "Okay." The word came out quiet and almost too hard to hear. He kept his face nuzzled against Dwicky's palm for a few seconds until he finally lifted his head and opened his eyes back up. His gaze moved over Dwicky's face for a bit before his eyes narrowed. Both his arms circled around the man's neck as he moved completely forward to lay against the other. Skeets was uncomfortably wedged between them, but at the moment he didn't seem to care. "I love you."

Dwicky pressed a quick kiss to the top of Dib's head. "I love you too. A lot." He leaned back against the couch with Dib draped over his front. He let his eyes shut, lethargy taking over. "It'll get better.. We still have all of tomorrow to ourselves."

Dib only gave a small nod as he easily relaxed against Dwicky. His own mind was slowly shutting down from everything that had happened and he was giving in. He made a small noise and soon that was all that came from him even as he curled just a bit more against the other.

"And if tomorrow isn't our day.. then the next day.. or the day after that.. or the day after that.. or the next day.. or the next day.. or the next day.." Dwicky's voice drifted off and he just sat there, staring out the window with Dib sleep against him. He frowned, letting his own eyes fall half shut. It looked like it was going to rain tomorrow. "... and the day after that." he finished quietly.


	22. Sessions 22

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dib and Dwicky for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 22

As time passed, the apartment had grown much darker. Only a small bit of light showed through the windows from a street lamp. Sleep wasn't coming as well as it had been earlier to Dib, and the comfort he had near him, he noticed, was no longer there. With an annoyed noise, he slowly opened his eyes and lifted one hand to rub the sleep away from them. Having slept with his glasses on had knocked them askew, and he tried his best to straighten them as he sat up and looked around. Dwicky was no longer on the couch with him.

He stood up slowly, taking Skeets with him as he did. The painkillers had finally worn off, so as he stepped down on his foot he couldn't help but let out a pained sound. As soon as he was straight enough, he glanced around trying to see if there were any lights on down the hall. Not seeing anything, he frowned and turned his eyes towards the kitchen. As he did, he caught a glimpse of a sliding door behind the couch that seemed to be cracked open, and it held his curiosity for a while. He finally limped his way to it.

The glass door easily slid open enough to allow his body through; he didn't bother closing it behind him. His eyes stared at the figure that leaned against the balcony, glass in hand. For a second, his attention darted up to the stars the other was staring at before moving back. "Dwicky?"

The man flinched, startled by the voice behind him. He turned to look back at Dib, his forehead creasing as his brows rose. "Dib," Dwicky spoke a little too lethargically, "I was just think'n'of you." He tried to pull the glass he gripped from view as subtly as he could. "I didn't wake you, did I?" He straightened and turned a little more to look at the boy. Despite how languid the man looked, how run down he seemed, concern was still permanently etched on his features.

Dib's eyes were forced away from the glass as it was pulled from his sight, and instead they were drawn towards Dwicky's face. He leaned back against the door to keep weight off his leg as he answered. "No, I couldn't sleep anymore, so I woke up on my own" His eyes narrowed just a bit as curiosity got the best of him. Slowly, he brought Skeets under his chin. "What kind of things were you thinking about?"

Dwicky raised a hand and gave a lackluster shrug. "Responsible things, I assure you. Stuff mostly. Things, ya know." He set his hand back down on the railing, leaning back against it to look up at the sky; the answers were never there, only problems. "The future.. maybe." He looked back to Dib and gave a weak smile. "Didja need anything? Food? Drink? Um.. there's sleeping pills with your nighttime medication that you should be taking. They should help ya'get more sleep. If tha's 'what you want."

Dib only shook his head at each. Finally, he pushed off of the door and tried his best to make his way over to the railing. It took longer than he'd wanted, but once he was there he stood next to Dwicky. A hand moved from Skeets to one of the lower bars. "I was just looking for you. I woke up and you were gone, so I got a little worried." He looked to the side at Dwicky once more. "It's okay if I stay out here with you, isn't it?"

"Of course." Dwicky instantly answered in a quiet voice. "This is just'as much my home as it'is yers. Feel free to do anything. Anytime. Really." His gaze shifted to the view across from them. Nothing much to look at, shrubs, sparse trees, other houses, parking lots. It was so late that everything was thrown into shadow. The only interesting view was the sky through telephone wires. Dwicky took a long sip from his glass. It was obviously something strong because he grimaced soon after. "Dunno what it is about drink'n that makes someone want'a stand at'a balcony 'n stare at the sky. One'a life's big mysteries.. I guess." He shifted his glass around, the ice softly clinked at the sides.

Dib once more let his eyes fall on the glass. "What are you drinking?" Without even waiting for a response, he leaned over and tried his best to stand on the tip toes of his good foot so he could get a look inside. "You don't seem to like it very much." Despite that fact, he looked back up to Dwicky and blinked his eyes. "Can I try whatever it is?"

Dwicky settled rather open eyes on Dib before he looked down at his glass. A guilty frown forced its way onto his face. "N-no." He laughed disjointedly. "It would mess with yer medication. This- this isn't good for kids.. or adults." He stared passively in front of himself. "Maybe.. someday. When you're out, and you aren't on anything." That caused a sad chuckle to leave him and he rubbed the bridge of his nose before he rubbed his whole face. He placed his arm back on the rail. "Someday a lot of things." Dwicky snorted with wry amusement. "I could go to jail for this: failure ferrr responsible... -actions of and supervision badness. Of some sort. Heh. But I guess that's the least of my problems." Dwicky smirked lightly at Dib, a knowing look. "I've got 'illegal' written all over me, don't I. I guess it can't be helped." The smirk drifted away to something more docile as he reached over and touched the pointed lock of hair that stood up on Dib's head. "I guess we didn't try hard enough to forget."

Dib moved his eyes up as that one piece of hair was poked, but he just as quickly turned his eyes back to Dwicky as he stood completely back on his foot. "We're being careful, though. You don't have to worry about anything." The way the man spoke caused his eyes to narrow once again, and a concerned look came over his face. He stayed that way for a bit before he turned back around to face the railing. Even though his eyes were on the sky, his attention was still on Dwicky. "Are you okay?"

Dwicky rubbed his mouth, giving a dry sniff. "I will be. ..I mean. Yea. I am." He raised his eyes back to the sky. He leaned heavily against the railing, resting the glass on it and draped one arm from it.

Dib ran his hand along the railing for a few seconds. His other hand clutched Skeets tighter under his chin. When he spoke up once more, his voice was softer, "It doesn't sound like it. You can talk about what's bugging you if you want." He lifted a few fingers up and tried to trace the stars with invisible lines. "You let me tell you all my problems. I'll listen to you this time."

"We should just move away," the words just blurted from Dwicky's mouth. "Just you and me. Far, far away from this city, these people, to a place where no one knows who we are, or what we've done. A clean slate. Start new. A new life. New jobs. New people. New friends. Just a small one bedroom house. I've always wanted a house. Nothing fancy. Doesn't even need a garden. Maybe just a fence.. doesn't even have to be white, or picket." Dwicky rubbed at an eye and looked to the horizon. "Far from the city, so that we could just lay down on the roof and just stare up at the sky; day in, day out." Dwicky clacked his mouth shut. "Wow.. I should jus' stop thinking aloud now. It's too heartbreaking." He took another long drink from his glass, making the same face.

Dib turned his attention back to Dwicky and let his hand fall back down. For a few seconds, he stared at the other once again. "I would like that." He rested the side of his head against the railing. "I wouldn't mind leaving and just being with you." He looked back out at the sky and the city. "I hate everything here. Nothing is working out. I would like to just leave with you and live somewhere with you. I don't want to have to worry at all." He buried his face in his arm. "No one would care and neither would I."

"We can't. And they would." Dwicky answered somberly. "I would love t'just up and leave.. but it can't be done." He reached over and settled his hand on Dib's head, then softly stroked his hair. "Not now anyway.. maybe when yer outta the hospital.. outta skool." His hand stilled. That felt so impossibly far away; especially when they were living one day at at time. A day felt like months. Four years would be an eternity.

Dib lifted his eyes just a bit so they peeked out over his arm. "You would really just take me away from here? When everything is finally okay, and we don't have to worry about anything, you would just take me away?" His eyes fell away from the sky and finally turned back to Dwicky. He stayed silent for a few moments before he spoke up once again. "To anywhere at all?"

Dwicky pushed away his dismal thoughts so that he could smile a wide, tired smile Dib's way. "Of course." He continued to pet the boy's hair. "Anywhere. Anywhere at all. Far away. Somewhere warm 'n nice. Just leave all the dead weight 'n worry behind." Dwicky rested his head down on his other arm. It was such a lovely pipe dream.

If the words didn't help Dib, the small bit of petting did. "You wouldn't miss this place?" He raised his head up the rest of the way, but made sure not to disturb Dwicky's hand. "You left once, and even though you said you came back because of me, you still missed everything here didn't you?" He let his eyes fall back down, looking out at the other houses instead. "Although, I guess I wouldn't blame you if you didn't."

"I said 'hey' to a couple'a old friends, but no one missed me. An'ta tell you the truth, I really didn't miss anything here." Dwicky smiled some, feeling well enough to. "Iz'funny. You really shook up my world, Dib. Turned it upside down an' gave it a good shake." He smiled a little more and closed his eyes. "I never said thanks, Dib, but.. heh, thanks, Dib. Thanks for a lot." He stood up from the railing and set his glass down on a small stool table that had a small plant on it. It had died two years ago. "This time I'll take you somewhere.." Dwicky stepped over to Dib, languidly slipping his arms around the boy's shoulders to nuzzle his cheek against his head. He cuddled Dib with obvious affection. "And we won't have to come back. Ever."

A small blush came over Dib's face, and he leaned back against Dwicky away from the railing. His free hand moved up to cover one of Dwicky's own as he spoke up. "I didn't do anything special. You really don't have to thank me." He gave a small frown as he went on. "I think I've been more of a burden than anything at all. I don't think it's much of a good thing." The frown disappeared as he gave a weak laugh. "I'm surprised you haven't tried to get rid of me yet."

"Mmm. Can't." Dwicky cuddled Dib more. "Too obsessed." He kissed Dib's head. "Too addicted." He kissed Dib's ear. "For my own good." He nuzzled his head down to press his mouth along Dib's neck, dragging lazy, bitten kisses to the crook of the boy's neck. He let out an audible exhale against the wet skin; his breath quickening. "I can't help but keep you."

The little bites and breath against his neck caused a visible shiver to pass through Dib's body. He couldn't help the tiny moan that passed his lips either, and he really didn't try to stop it. "I'm glad." The words were spoken in a quiet voice much like before. "I've heard certain obsessions can be unhealthy though, so you may want to be careful." A small grin came to his lips after those words.

"Iz alright." Dwicky pressed his grin against wet skin, as well as a few more bitten kisses. He sucked the pale skin affectionately. His mouth parted from Dib's neck with a pleasant, wet sound and it only had Dwicky grinning more. "All I wanna do is kiss you breathless." His arms slid down Dib's middle keeping the boy closely snuggled. Hands slid under the hoodie, drawing fingers along the soft, warm skin beneath. He then tugged the bottom of the sweatshirt up abruptly, exposing the skin underneath to the cool air. His hands possessively ran over each inch of skin. "..And lick you." He tugged the collar of the hoodie from Dib's shoulder so he could continue attacking the skin from crook of neck down.

Words failed Dib in that moment, so instead, he only gave needy moans and whimpers. Both of his arms fell to his sides, and the hand that held Skeets loosened it's grip, almost completely letting go of the plush. He moved his head just a bit so Dwicky could lick at even more of his skin. Each touch across his stomach caused another small shiver to run through his body as he pressed closer to the other.

Dwicky ended with a kiss to Dib's shoulder. He grinned lazily there. "Hold yer shirt up for me, please." He took Dib's free hand and placed it on the gathered sweatshirt at his front. Dwicky then ran his hand slowly up and down Dib's stomach, tracing a clumsy finger ever slightly around his belly button. He kissed the boy's neck again. "Be right back." Down Dwicky slunk to his knees in front of Dib, running his hands up and down the other's sides before he kissed the boy's stomach. He ran his mouth up, flicking a tongue to the bottom rib that jutted from Dib's thin middle.

Dib took one small glance down to Dwicky curious as to what the other was doing. The hands at his sides relaxed him for a moment, yet the small kiss caused a quiet sound to escape him. As soon as he felt the tongue on his skin, his eyes fell halfway closed and the noise he made grew louder. He almost let go of his shirt for a moment, but he managed to keep the grip he had and tried his best to hold onto it despite his shaky hand.

Dwicky ran his tongue up until he neared the blockade of sweater. He then dipped his head, tugging Dib's pants down a smidge lower so he could run his tongue daringly below Dib's belly button. With a sound low in his throat, Dwicky moved to place a biting kiss on the boy's bony hip, keeping his hands at Dib's lower hips. He flicked his tongue against soft skin before clamping his mouth down above the hip, biting down with a lick.

Dib couldn't help biting at his lip as he tried to keep what noise he wanted to make to a minimum. Even though he tried, a few moans still got through, as muffled as they were. The attention he was receiving finally caused him to drop Skeets to the balcony. The now free hand moved to grip Dwicky's shoulder as he tried to keep himself upright, sure that his knees would buckle under him at any moment.

Dwicky pushed Dib back, leaning the boy against the cool rail. He drew one hand up and down Dib's clothed inner thigh, straightening so he could track wet kisses back up the boy's stomach. He bit gently at the flat of middle as best he could, pressing his mouth to hum his groan against wet skin.

Dib gave up on being quiet and let out each moan and small whine that came from him. His back arched lightly against the railing as he tried to press more of his skin near Dwicky's mouth. His hand moved up from the man's shoulder and to his hair instead, running fingers through it as he let out small whimpers.

A hand slid up Dib's front under the sweater, dragging fingertips and nails back down before rubbing the trails as his hand went back up. Dwicky ran his hand over Dib's chest until he found what he wanted, running fingers over the nub before pinching it. He pressed his lips up just below the sweatshirt trying to nuzzle under it, licking what skin he could get at.

The pinch caused Dib's breath to hitch and he couldn't help but tighten his fingers in the man's hair. He almost slid down despite being pushed up against the rail. His body just refused to hold him up any longer it seemed. "Dwicky..." The name was let out in a small, breathless moan that sounded much too needy.

Dwicky gave Dib's stomach a few more greedy kisses before he let the boy slide from the rail, helping him to sit on his lap; though, not without letting the sweatshirt ride up and giving a flick of tongue to the nub he pinched. He possessively sought out Dib's mouth, never giving a thought to the taste of strong alcohol still in his own as he slipped his tongue in.

Dib wasted no time in wrapping his leg around Dwicky's waist as soon as he was on the man's lap. His foot pushed at Dwicky's shirt and ran down the small of his back while at the same time he tried his best to push as close as he could to the taller body. The kiss pulled a muffled groan from him and he eagerly returned it despite the taste. If anything, it caused him to press back harder and try even more to curl his tongue around Dwicky's own.

The man pressed a heated kiss or two before pulling away, though not far; he still bit at Dib's bottom lip. "S'good I can't stand on ma own." Dwicky's words were husky and slurred; the hard drink catching up with him. "I'd carry'ya off to bed." His mind was swimming, and not in a very chaste pool of thought. Just when he thought he'd drowned good sense in a glass, there it was nagging its reminders. That didn't stop his hands from wandering, skirting across the still wet skin at Dib's hips, pressing Dib even closer against him; Dwicky held back an encouraging noise.

It was anything but an innocent sound that escaped Dib at Dwicky's words and the hands at his hips. He leaned forward and moved his tongue out to lick at the man's goatee for only a quick second before he trailed his tongue down, leaving a wet line. When he got to Dwicky's throat he started to bite just a bit at the skin before he sucked at it. His hand finally moved away from his shirt to grip Dwicky's shoulder, bringing him closer.

The world spun in dark vertigo as Dwicky shut his eyes, and he ended up clunking his head down on Dib's shoulder with a sharp moan. He kept his arms tightly around Dib still dragging his hands up and down the boy's back every so often.

With Dwicky's head on his shoulder, Dib moved his tongue up towards the man's ear. He left a wet trail along the rim before he started to suck at the lobe, flicking his tongue against it a few times. He only kept at it for a few moments before he took the lobe between his teeth and bit down lightly, tugging at it as he pulled away. Once he finally let go, he nuzzled Dwicky's neck, licking at the skin before he finally settled down.

Dwicky had let out a weak whimper; the sound died away when Dib finally stilled. Dib was so warm, his skin slick with both saliva and sweat. Dwicky didn't want to move, not when Dib was close like that, not when it felt so good. It was an exhibition on his balcony, making everything he had said hypocritical, but right now he didn't care. Dwicky only tightened his hold around the boy, his mind lost in an intoxicated languor.

Dib continued to move his foot up and down Dwicky's lower back. His toes curled a few times causing them to catch on the other's pants, but he didn't seem to mind if Dwicky didn't. His hand moved from the man's shoulder to slip inside the shirt and run fingers across the man's back. The motions became lazy after a while, but he never pulled away.

Dwicky's skin prickled and he let out a few quiet sounds. He clumsily kissed what skin he could, abhorring the sweatshirt that was in his way. He let out a heavy breath and cuddled Dib, burying his face in the boy's shoulder. He softly murmured something, but it probably wasn't coherent anyway.

The small kisses had Dib closing his eyes for a moment, enjoying the sensation and giving one more small lick to Dwicky's neck in return. The mumbled words had him opening his eyes back up and shifting just slightly so he could glance at Dwicky. He was about to question what the other had said, but thought better of it when he got a good look at him. Instead, he let his other hand run through Dwicky's hair.

Dwicky was more than easily subdued by the fingers through his hair, and he rested heavily against the body he held, nearly slumping. His hand wandered down Dib's hips, down a leg, but when it touched bandages Dwicky's eyes opened. He touched the bandages so very carefully, as if it were more fragile than ash. "S'hurt?" Dwicky's whisper slurred.

It was spoken so softly, the one word almost startled Dib. At first he didn't understand what Dwicky meant until he glanced over to where the other's hand was. "Oh..." For a second he thought about lying. He didn't want to make Dwicky worry over him anymore considering everything else that had been going on. His injury didn't seem like it should have mattered so much. "A little bit." A lie just wouldn't come out. "It's not that bad. It's okay." His one hand fidgeted a bit on the man's skin. "I was able to walk out here without any problems."

The man finally tugged Dib's hoodie back down as best as he could with his lack of coordination. He smoothed the shirt down, rubbing the boy's back lazily. "Ye'should go back inside, take yer meds. An' go t'bed. S'late. 'N' s'cold out."

Dib only shook his head at that while he finally moved so he could look at Dwicky's face. "I don't want to." He moved his hand away from Dwicky's back and instead let it fall down to the front of the man's shirt, clutching at it. "You said I could stay out here with you, so that's what I want to do." He looked down at his hand. "I'll be okay. I got plenty of sleep."

Dwicky stared at Dib, and he reached over to tug the boy's hood up over his head, amused that the scythe lock of hair went out and over the top. He leaned in and placed a slow lingering kiss on the boy's lips, breaking it with a weak smile. "Alright. Just'a bit longer." Inebriated he was far more of a push over than he was sober.

Dib's eyes traveled back up after the kiss. He couldn't help but lick his lips at the strange taste the other left there. The taste was becoming addicting, if a little odd. He couldn't help but want more of it and that meant getting it the only way he knew how. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against Dwicky's, not giving the other much time to think on the action before he was pushing his tongue past the other's lips.

Dwicky's hands raised to cup the back of Dib's head, meeting his tongue against the other's. He exhaled audibly, licking teeth and lips before pressing his own firmly against Dib's. He broke the kiss to speak. "I did it fer you." He flicked his tongue against Dib's. "Everything.. anything." He pressed his lips against Dib's again.

The sudden words caused Dib to blink in curiosity. The tongue against his own and press of lips caused his mind to shut down once more and push the words to the back of his head just as quickly. Both hands wrapped around Dwicky's neck as he tried to pull the man as close as he could while his leg tightened.

Dwicky softly bit Dib's lip, giving it a sucking tug before letting it go. He smirked lazily, it was only going to start up again, and it wouldn't exactly have a Family Channel ending; at least not for the neighbors. "Mph. I want'a do bad things, an' I can't." His smirk pulled into a grin against Dib's lips. "It'sucks." He glanced around the balcony, though the quick motion made him dizzy. "Where'd'I put my drink?"

Dib gave a small whine when Dwicky pulled away. The words the other said caused a blush to come over his cheeks and the whine to become more pitiful. He watched Dwicky look around for a few more seconds before he finally moved one hand to point over towards the stool where the glass was still sitting. "It's over there." He then turned his attention back to Dwicky and ran what nails he had left over the back of the man's neck. "Don't get up though. I like this." Just to prove his point, he leaned forward to take Dwicky's ear between his teeth and sucked at the lobe.

"Come back, drink." Dwicky reached out a hand, but it was much too far. "Oh-ohhhh." he drew out the sound, going lax, his stretching arm began to fall. "Aw, but- but drink." Dwicky gave a little whine as he tried to find strength again to reach out. The mouth on his ear had him torn and he groaned. One hand gripped Dib's sweatshirt as Dwicky tried to lean over for the glass. Of course, the man's balance and every other motor skill failed; with a surprised sound, he toppled over with Dib on top.

Dib let out a small sound of his own at the sudden movement, letting go of Dwicky's ear in the process. He tried his best to get over his surprise as he pushed himself up with his hands on Dwicky's chest. As soon as he saw how close they were though, he couldn't help the small playful grin that came to his lips and decided to stay exactly where he was. He made two of his fingers walk up across Dwicky's chest as he stared the man in the face, scooting up just a bit so his legs straddled the other's waist. "See, now you can't get up."

Dwicky blinked a few times trying to clear the disorientation. He blinked up at Dib and gave a laugh. His laughter turned into a groan as he rubbed his face before looking up at the stool. It seemed almost unreachable now. "Awww." He tried to anyway, but of course, still came up short. "Damnit." His hand flopped down on the balcony floor where it was. He looked back up at Dib who had him pinned. He was quite pleased with the situation. Dwicky tried to squirm, but he doubted he could get up on his own anyway. He stole Dib's traveling hand and licked up one of the 'legs'. "C'mon, one sip. Please?" He ran his tongue along the boy's other finger.

Dib's eyes fell halfway closed. He bit at his lip knowing he was losing the battle. Leaning forward, Dib licked at Dwicky's throat to get some form of payback. The one small lick ended at the man's chin and when he pulled back he spoke softly. "Fine, get your drink." He moved to get off of Dwicky, but he did much more squirming than he really needed to and it took much longer for him to actually get off of the man as he did.

Dwicky let out a longing sigh that ruffled the dark hair that had fallen into his eyes. "Wow.. ssscandalousss." He glanced around slowly, trying to figure out how he'd go about sitting back up. Since when had such a simple act become such a grueling enigma? With a grunt, Dwicky rolled over and pushed himself up; it was on the second or third try that he finally got up. He found himself in between two most tempting items: Dib, and his drink. Dib was squirmy fun, but his drink was barely a foot away. "I'll be right back." Quickly Dwicky grabbed his drink and downed the rest of it. He made a face and coughed, almost missing the stool when he put the glass down. "Uck. All my ice melted."

Dib had walked over to where he dropped Skeets only to pick the plush up and brush whatever dirt there was off of it. The sudden cough caused him to turn his attention back to Dwicky and look at the other with concerned eyes. The expression only stayed on his face for a moment, though; when he heard the words the man said and he couldn't help but laugh a tiny bit against Skeets, trying his best to muffle it.

Dwicky glanced over when he heard the laughter and grinned the boy's way. "I wanna do that." He pointed at Dib. "Standing. Yea. I'm in awe. Really." He gestured for Dib to come near again. "O'course, I'd rather do you." He laughed; such a bad joke, he knew it, but oh well.

Dib's laughter quickly died at those words and instead a blush came over his face that was visible even in the dark. Even with how embarrassed he suddenly was, he made his way over to Dwicky while partially hiding his face behind Skeets. As soon as he was beside the other, he leaned over so he could claim a kiss once more, wanting to taste that odd flavor that had been on Dwicky's tongue once again. The man's words made him be a bit more forward as well.

"Mm. Can'ye help me up?" Dwicky couldn't help his goofy grin. He took Dib's chin between his fingers and took another quick kiss. "I can't seem'ta do it with my own power." He stole another few kisses, grinning wider with each one, and ended with a slow press of lips, running his tongue against the other's lips and teeth.

Every kiss had a soft, pleased sound coming from Dib. After the final one, he pulled back and gave a small grin of his own. "I don't know. We might just end up on the floor again." Despite the words, Dib moved one hand away from Skeets and used it to help Dwicky up anyway.

With a grunt Dwicky staggered to his feet. Quite unstable, he grasped onto Dib and leaned against the wall. He gave a slight laugh and glanced through the glass door into the house. "Just make sure I don't follow ya'ta bed." He looked back to Dib, trying to blink away his dizziness, but his crooked smile never left.

Dib's earlier blush came back with those words. Even so, he still kept the grin that was on his face and glanced up at Dwicky. "We sleep in the same bed." He looked off to the side and tried to seem as innocent as he could. "I guess nothing can really be helped then, can it?" He looked at Dwicky out the corner of his eyes. "Such a shame."

Dwicky closed one eye as he looked at Dib. He smirked then and wagged a finger pointedly. "Tricky. Very tricky. But-" he shrugged and pulled the same innocent look "I c'n always just sleep on the couch." The quirking amused grin didn't help his nonchalance, or his inability to stand straight.

Dib frowned at that for a few quick seconds. He tried his best to look innocent once more as he clutched at Dwicky's shirt. "The couch is so uncomfortable, though. I would feel much better if you were somewhere comfortable. Not to mention warm." He gave a small nod as if such a thing made all the sense in the world.

Dwicky leaned his back against the wall finding more balance in it. He smirked tiredly at the boy. "You'd feel better?" He raised a dark brow. Those two words could be taken in so many ways.

Dib blinked his eyes up at Dwicky until finally the innocent expression melted away. A small grin tugged at his lips and he pulled a bit at Dwicky's shirt with his one hand. "Yes, I'd feel a lot better." He looked down at his hand as he continued speaking. "It would be so cold in that bed alone. I'm sure if you were there you could warm me up." He glanced back up.

"Heating pad." Dwicky listed on a hand, amused. "Hot water bottle. More blankets in the hall closet. Ugh- I think there's a thermostat doodly that you turn and makes things hotter. Skeets." He pointed at the plush in the boy's arms and gave the ladybug a pet. "Skeets will keep ye'warm and toasty. Right? He's so big and manly. He knows how to treat a Dib right." Dwicky leaned down just enough to place a kiss on the boy's forehead. "He'd never do naughty things t'young, impressionable boys who are supposed to be on their best behavior, and not taking advantage of lonely, drunken men." Dwicky grinned lazily and stole a quick kiss from Dib's lips.

Despite the kiss, Dib still gave a small pout. He took his hand away from Dwicky's shirt so he could hold Skeets with both and looked up at the man with a sour expression. After a few moments, the expression fell and a sigh escaped him as he looked away. "It's not fair, but fine. You sleep on the couch."

"Awww. Don't be sore ma' little Dib." Dwicky reached over and tugged Dib over, hugging the unhappy boy to him for a warm cuddle; he folded quicker than a deck of cards. It was true, he couldn't resist that pout, and intoxicated, his resistance was paper thin. "I'd never leave you. If you want Mister Dwicky to come with ye'ta bed, he will. But just t'sleep. Not t'sleep with." He gave a small lewd chuckle.

The small cuddle caused Dib's bad mood to fall away. He rested his head against Dwicky's chest and gave only a tiny nod. "I don't mind that." He brought Skeets up under his chin and tried to bury his face in the plush as he went on. "I just want to be with you either way."

Dwicky nodded against Dib's head. "And I'll try not to lick you." But that didn't mean he couldn't lean down and run his tongue over the rim of Dib's ear. "Aw. Which iz'sad because Dib is my favorite flavor." He frowned playfully against Dib's ear.

Dib let out a tiny sound at such attention. When Dwicky stopped, he glanced at the man out the corner of his eyes, the pout returning to his face for only a split second. "Well, you can do it here and there." A small playful look came over his face. "You just can't lick me all over."

Dwicky chuckled and nuzzled the top of Dib's head. "_That_ is at the top of ma'to'do list when you get out, trust me." He went back to running his tongue over Dib's ear, sliding his tongue over the curves. "Mmm. Dib ear." He sucked at it softly.

Another sound left Dib, louder than last time. His whole body slumped against Dwicky's own. One of his hands moved up weakly to push the hood of his sweatshirt away from his head to expose his ear, then let his hand drop down to his side.

Dwicky happily continued to suck on the ear. He ran his tongue around what he had in his mouth, trying to take more in. He noticed Dib's rather complacent reaction and hummed a curious sound against the the skin. He let the ear slide wetly from his mouth, giving it a few more licks before he was done. "Oops." He hadn't meant to subdue Dib so.

Dib had made a small humming sound until finally Dwicky pulled away. The lost attention caused him to blink his eyes and turn them towards the other in a small bit of confusion. His body was still slack and he gave a small whine before speaking, "You're teasing me."

Dwicky offered the boy a clueless smile. "Of course I'm not." He leaned back against the wall, arms still loosely around the boy. "I never tease."

Dib narrowed his eyes at that. He turned around so he was facing Dwicky and moved his free hand up to wrap it around the man's waist. "Really? Well, if you never tease then what do you call what you just did? Along with all the other times, I might add." He rested his chin on the man's chest as he gazed up at him, waiting for an answer.

Dwicky pursed his lips and blinked a few times. He'd never thought of it. He looked skyward, looking from star to star as he thought it over briefly. Finally, he smiled back down at Dib and gave a shrug. "Affection?" he chuckled.

Dib gave a small smile of his own at that answer. He moved his arm up so he could wrap it around Dwicky's neck, pulling the man down to his level for a split second. He stole a quick kiss, letting his arm fall back down and Dwicky move back up. He licked at his own lips, trying to get every bit of the flavor that still hung on them. He gave Dwicky another small smile and rested his head back down on the man's chest. "Works for me."

Dwicky sighed softly, closing his eyes as he clunked his head back to relax against the wall. It was a lovely feeling, to just give in to that dizzy blackness behind his eyes. He just barely ran his fingers through Dib's hair. "See. We're alright. We're doin good. No one can say otherwise." He paused and blinked one eye open. "Or I'd punch'em." He shook a weak fist.

Dib turned his eyes back to Dwicky at the small threat. He couldn't help the amused look that came over his face. His hand moved once again to grip Dwicky's fist and lower it back down as he kept his eyes on the man. "Maybe you should worry about standing on your own first, then you can start punching."

"I c'n stand! I c'n. I'm stand'n right now. Seee." Dwicky shifted under Dib, though if it weren't for the boy pinning him upright, he would have obviously fallen down. "Now I shall punch- aaall who stand'n the way of our love!" He raised his other fist and shook it at the sky. "Dare not stand'n my way- for I shall PUNCH!" Dwicky grinned widely and leaned forward, threatening the peaceful slumbering houses below. "Hear me now people- I love Dib! And no one shall- ya'know- or I'll punch you!" He threw out his arms in revelation with a hoot. "I LOVE DIB!"

Dib's eyes widened at the loud shout. While it was very flattering that Dwicky felt the need to shout such a thing, it probably also wasn't a very good idea. His eyes moved across the balcony to a few houses hoping that the lights stayed permanently out in them. A loud bark in the distance caused him to jump and after a few seconds. He settled down when he realized it was just a dog. He turned his eyes back to Dwicky. While it was hard for him to stay mad at the other over such a thing, he at least tried to seem a little annoyed. "Remember the thing about being careful? You're not doing that."

"Well- neither are'you," Dwicky huffed back. "Being licked on'a balcony out'in the open is faaar from careful," he pointed out, tapping Dib's head with a finger. "And I do love you. I love you so much- I must tell EVERYONE else! For if I don't, I will surely explode." He quickly added "And not in the good way." Dwicky cleared his throat so he could shout the same three words again.

Dib blushed at Dwicky's words. When he noticed that the other was going to shout once again he quickly moved his hand to pull Dwicky's head down to place a kiss on his lips. His tongue moved out to lick at the other's bottom lip for a few seconds before he pulled his own head back. With one of his fingers, he tapped at Dwicky's mouth. "While I think it's sweet how much you want to tell everyone you love me, I would rather you not get in trouble for that particular fact."

"Mmmm. Aw." Dwicky frowned his disappointment and gave the finger at his lips a small lick. "Just- just one little shout? Someone has'ta know. At least one persons'gotta. Hm. How 'bout that guy over there? He's staring." He pointed beside them to another balcony, a stout man with a beer belly who had come outside to smoke. Dwicky raised a hand to wave and tell the stranger the good news. "Hey! Guy!"

Dib could almost feel his heart stop in that moment. Once again his eyes widened and he quickly dropped his hand back down to tug at Dwicky's arm. "I-I don't think you should bug him about it." He tried to tug Dwicky towards the door, but considering his bad leg, he wasn't having much luck. "Come on, let's go back inside and go to bed." His next words came out as more of a whine. "Please, Dwicky."

Dwicky waved at the other man with a big grin. "Night night!" He let himself get pulled back inside, staggering badly and nearly smacking into the glass door. "I love Dib!" he called out before the glass door was firmly shut after him.

The other man on the deck just stared, giving the rear of his boxers a scratch. "..Kids." He shrugged it off and lit up his smoke.


	23. Sessions 23

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dwicky and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 23

On the counter in the kitchen sat a familiar ladybug plush. It's beady eyes watched as smoke poured from a pan on top of the stove. A harsh cough soon followed as a hand tried to wave away the acrid clouds. As soon as the air was clear enough and the smoke alarm was no longer in danger of sounding, a disappointed whine filled the room.

"That's five pancakes burnt." Dib finally voiced. His eyes looked at the blackened mess in the pan and his shoulders slumped. "I used to to fix these all the time." The pout on his face grew. "Stupid crazy house." He blew at the limp piece of hair that hung over his face; it was still damp from showering. "I think I ruined the pan."

A muffled groan answered from the kitchen table, low and agonized. Dwicky kept his face down. Slumped against it was a bag of frozen corn resting atop his head. He had showered, dressed, and then planted himself there; he hadn't moved since. The man hadn't bothered to dry, or comb his hair, and a small puddle of water was starting to form on the table. Dwicky didn't care since the water made the coldness in the pack that much more soothing: an icy numbness on his throbbing head. Even after a few painkillers, a hang over was definitely a beast that would not easily be taken down.

So of course Dwicky let the institutionalized boy who hadn't been near a stove for three years make breakfast. It was the sane thing to do.

Dwicky raised a few fingers. "S'okay. I'll eat it." he spoke weakly into the table; though whether he was talking about the pan or the pancakes was hard to tell. He was a little slow on the uptake at the moment.

Dib looked up from his place at the stove and over to the table with some concern. He was about to open his mouth to respond. Just as quickly, he closed it and looked back down to what lay inside the pan. After a few seconds, he shrugged his shoulders and picked a nearby plate up and placed the burnt mess on it. He kept his eyes on the pancakes for a few more moments and finally gave in, picking up the bottle of syrup he had found. He dumped a bit on them before he walked over to the table to place the plate in front of Dwicky. Sitting across from the man, he pointed out, "Your corn is melting."

"Mmm.. I like corn," Dwicky randomly spoke to himself. A waves of malcontent churned his stomach to tell him otherwise. As the nausea hit him, he was quite happy he was already collapsed across the table. "Ugh.. no, no I don't. Corn is the enemy." He went even more slack. He heard the plate as it was set in front of him, but that meant movement, and movement meant giving the sickness he felt the satisfaction of, well, being felt. The man's hand dragged itself across the table to find the fork, but it bumped into the syrup. The blockade proved to be too much, so he gave up on the mission with a defeated sound.

Dib gave a sympathetic smile at Dwicky's troubles. He decided to help the other and reached out to move the syrup aside. After that, he picked the fork up and placed it in Dwicky's hand, clasping the man's hand around it to give him a better grip on it. He kept it like that for a few seconds until he was sure it was safe to let go, and settled back into his seat. "You need to try to eat something." He glanced down at the plate. "Er...as horrible as it may be."

Dwicky gave a muffled moan. Obviously the idea of eating wasn't the most appealing of things to do at the moment. He waved the fork around slightly in his hand. "Ffffork. Nyum nyum nyum, num. Delicious, Dib." Okay, so those sound affects weren't fooling anyone.

Dib narrowed his eyes a bit, but not out of annoyance. He really couldn't help the slight smirk that tugged at his lips as he leaned forward to snatch the fork back. "You're so charming." He twirled the utensil in his hand. Just as he was about to open his mouth again, he was startled by a loud banging at the door. He jerked upright in his seat.

Dwicky cringed, clamping down the bag of frozen corn on his head; it sounded like a bomb had gone off outside the door. After a second, he slowly sat up, bag still on his head as he looked over at the door with contempt. "Do they have to knock so loud." he hissed in whisper. Dragging the bag off his head he set it on the table and pushed himself to stand with a grunt. ".. Its their fault if I puke on their shirt." He hobbled over through the kitchen to the door. Rubbing his face, then running it through his wet, matted hair, Dwicky looked through the peep hole as he leaned heavily on the door.

On the other side of the door stood the slightly distorted image of Professor Membrane. He was dressed in his usual lab coat and thick goggles that were currently narrowed on the door in front of him. One of his hands tapped away at his arm until it finally reached up to knock more forcefully upon the door.

Dwicky went rigid, completely rigid, as all the colour drained from his face and skin. He couldn't move for a second, but when he did, it was sporadic. He nearly tripped as he took a few steps to flail at Dib. "It's your dad!" he hissed a loud whisper at Dib. He raked both his hands through his hair as he looked around desperately, but what to do just wasn't on the counters. He clapped a hand over his mouth and made an ill groan. "Oh, I'm gunna be sick." He held an arm over his churning stomach.

Dib's own face went through so many different expressions all at once. Surprised to excited to just completely horrified. It was hard for him to actually figure out what to feel at all. Although Dwicky's reaction to the situation only caused him to feel nervous. He got up from his seat as quickly as he could to hurry over to the other. "You probably shouldn't do that right now." There was another knock on the door which caused Dib to flinch and look at it. "You _really_ shouldn't do that right now." He looked back at Dwicky.

"Okay, okay. Um. I'll answer the door- and- and you. You. Um. Stay calm. Yea." Dwicky nodded as he breathed into his hands, straightening. "We can do this. We can get through this." He turned and headed to the door again. "Oh man, I'm gunna vomit all over your father's nice, white lab coat. And then we'll all die." He stood at the door. "Coming!" He dashed into the bathroom and yanked a comb through his hair before going back. Sucking in a deep breath only turned his insides more sour. Dwicky glanced to Dib. "Ready?" he whispered.

Dwicky's last little statement didn't really help Dib all that much, and he fidgeted much more than he needed to. Despite his sudden nervousness, he still nodded his head and was able to stutter out a few words. "Y-Yeah, I'm ready."

Dwicky pressed his fingers into his temple, trying to press the throbbing pain inside his skull. Taking in a breath and exhaling it out his nose, Dwicky forced a pleasant smile on his face before he flicked the lock open and pulled open the door. "Professor Membrane! What a surprise. Come in." He stepped aside and gestured inside his apartment. "I'm sure Dib will be really, really, _really_ happy to see you." Oh, yeah, they were all going to die.

Membrane's hand had been inches from the door once more as it suddenly opened. He quickly dropped it and glanced at Dwicky for a second before he stepped inside acting as if the man weren't there. He barely even looked around before his eyes locked onto Dib who was standing across from the door. It only took him a moment to finally let out a frustrated sigh and look away. "I should have known your sister was right. You shouldn't be out of there at all." The words were harsh and biting.

At first Dib had seemed surprised and a bit happy to finally have some of his father's attention, but the words caused him to flinch. He looked down to the floor and moved one hand up to rub at his face as if that would make the bruises suddenly disappear. "It's not true. She's lying."

"N-now now, Professor." Dwicky interjected as kindly and politely as he could as he stepped between father and son, already needing to mediate. "Let's not be too hard on the young boy. He's been through a lot, and he's accomplished so much." He clasped his own hands together as if that symbolic action would be enough to bring the two together. "All to make up for what he's done, and to make you proud of him. He hasn't seen you in.. in- _years_. The least you could do is give him a _hello_ and a kind word." Dwicky tried to smile wider in encouragement, but his heart felt like it was going to lurch out of his throat, escorting the contents of his stomach. ".. He can't stay in there forever.. he's just a kid. How can he grow to be a 'normal person' when in such a crazy environment?"

Membrane turned his narrowed eyes from Dib to Dwicky. "Accomplished?" The one word was almost spat back at Dwicky. "As far as I can tell, he hasn't accomplished anything. As far as I can tell, and from what I've been told, he's worse off than before." He turned his eyes back to Dib, though it wasn't really clear whether his next words were really spoken to Dib or Dwicky. "What sane person attacks their own sister?"

Dib turned wide eyes back up and quickly shook his head. "I really didn't do it!" His fists clenched a bit at his sides as he tried to explain things. "They came to see me. They did it. She was..." He quickly stopped and looked over at Dwicky before he quickly looked back down. "I didn't do it."

Dwicky pressed two fingers to his temple and tried to ground out the hard pulse that ached behind his eyes. "I'm- I'm thinking he was provoked, sir," he started out quietly but firmly, trying to keep a handle on the conversation. "Dib is normally so calm and good natured, at least since I've been working with him. It wouldn't make sense that he would suddenly hurt his own family." Dwicky stared at the counter a quick second before looking to Membrane. ".. He had his arms tied down. And he walked away from the incident in far worse condition than your daughter and her friend." He pressed his lips together, brows furrowing in concern. His hand dropped and he raised them both in an open gesture. "There are unresolved issues between your children, Professor. A rivalry that has gotten much too out of hand. I'm sure you've seen it yourself. With this kind of extreme case, there would be evidence of physical tiffs getting out of hand."

"I was told he's had a history of harming himself in the asylum." Membrane turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "Why shouldn't I believe that every bit of that..." he pointed towards Dib, "...he did to himself." He let his hand fall back down as his eyes narrowed. "You've only been working with him for two weeks at most. You don't really know what he's capable of doing. You don't know how quickly he could go back to needing to be locked up for good." He shook his head. "If there were any form of rivalry between the two, then Gaz wouldn't have even bothered to go visit him."

Dib closed his eyes at the words being said. It was pointless to keep trying to defend himself since his dad never listened, even now when it really mattered. He wished at that moment he could just cling to Dwicky, wanting some form of comfort, but knew it would be the worst idea ever. He also wished that he hadn't left Skeets on the kitchen counter. So he just lifted his hands and hugged his arms trying to comfort himself.

Dwicky's lower eye twitched. The other man tweaked him in so many ways: the tone, the accusations. The headache that clawed against the back of his eyes, temple and sinuses grew worse. It was so hard to be civil when the professor wanted to be the antagonist to Dib's protagonist. Dwicky exhaled his anger; he definitely was going to be sick all over Dib's dad, but it was going to be more out of spite.

"Look at him, Professor." Dwicky tried to keep his voice from straining, but he had little strength to start with, and he was becoming exasperated. "He's just a kid, with problems like everyone else. If you want him to recover quickly, you have to be a supportive pillar in his life. You have to be with him, not against him." He gave a weak smile and spoke quietly, carefully "..Instead of pointing fingers, why don't you just.. hug him, and tell him you're happy to see him after several years apart." Dwicky gestured to Dib. "It would make all the difference, sir."

Membrane gave an aggravated sigh. "His problems are far from being like anyone else's." He turned his eyes back to Dib and kept them on the boy for a while without speaking. He moved a hand up to tap at his arm as he finally spoke up, the annoyance slowly fading from his voice. "Listen, son, I am happy that I'm able to see you after so long, but I really wish that it had been under different circumstances. I thought that one day I would have been able to visit and you would have almost been well enough to get out."

Dib had opened his eyes back up as soon as his dad started speaking to him, listening intently. He couldn't help but smile a bit at the fact the other was happy to see him, but it slowly faded as he was reminded of why his dad was even visiting in the first place. "I know. I'm sorry. I'm really trying though, even with the things that have happened." He just barely glanced over at Dwicky before he dropped his eyes back down.

Dwicky gave an animate nod. "Good. That's good. Talk. Talking is very good. And I'm sure it's been a while since you two have done that. Let it all out." He pressed his hands together, much too happy about snatching the glimmer of opportunity. "Here!" He placed a hand on both Dib's and Membrane's shoulders and pushed the two, before they had any chance to object, into the living room. "Have a seat." He pushed them to sit side by side on the couch. "Have a one on one. Catch up. Have a moment. Bond. You two are overdue for all of the above." And like the splendid host Dwicky was, he beamed a smile, despite the splitting pain in his head. He clasped his hands together, looking a deranged sort of pleased; the two had no choice now but to listen. "... I'll make tea." Dwicky left for the kitchen.

Dib quickly turned around to try and stop Dwicky. By the time he opened his mouth, the man was already gone and he pouted a bit. He dropped the finger he had raised and let out a small sigh.

Membrane had seemed a bit startled by the sudden switch from standing to sitting. His eyes had watched Dwicky leave before they settled back on Dib and the boy's sudden upset expression. He only kept his eyes on the other for a few moments before he started to look around. He was feeling incredibly fidgety; he wasn't used to sitting in one spot for so long with nothing to do. "So..." the word took a while to get out, "...do you get along well with Mister Dwicky?"

The question startled Dib and he quickly turned around to look at his father. "H-Huh?" He had to force himself not to blush; it was quite hard. So instead, he looked away back towards the kitchen waiting for Dwicky to come back. "Uh...y-yeah. I do."

As if on cue, Dwicky's head poked out from within the kitchen. "No, no. Don't talk about me. Talk about each other. Interests. Talk about the future. Make plans." He looked at Dib. "Tell your father about what you want to do. And father" he looked to Membrane "give good feedback and encouragement." He was then the epitome of good cheer as he smiled hard. "Cream? Sugar?"

Both Membrane and Dib nodded their heads in response to Dwicky's question. Membrane was the first to turn his attention back to Dib and his eyes narrowed once again. "What is it that you want to do?"

Dib quickly turned his eyes back to his dad while he settled more comfortably on the couch. "Well, um..." He averted his eyes elsewhere. What he was about to say wasn't exactly what his dad wanted to hear. It made him nervous as to what the other's reaction would be. "After I get out of skool, and out of the asylum obviously, I thought about different things I could do. Other things I'm interested in. Mostly bugs, computers, things like that. Maybe I could focus on things that have to do with those."

Membrane tensed up when the one thing he wanted from Dib wasn't mentioned. He kept his eyes on Dib for a few more minutes before he rested his chin on one hand while looking away. "Well, none of it has to do with aliens. That's good, I suppose." A small sigh could be heard from Dib after those words.

Dwicky peered out again. "See! That's very good. Remember," he pointed "be encouraging, Professor. Encouraging." He wagged his finger. "Keep going Dib, tell your father everything: how well you're doing, how you're progressing." He gave an oh so subtle encouraging gesture as he continued on in a dwindling quiet tone "How much you're looking forward to going to skool again." Dwicky then disappeared back into the kitchen after that.

Dib had lifted his head just a bit to look back at Dwicky when the man peeked out. Having a bit of encouragement from the other was helping a bit, but he was still really nervous. His eyes moved back to his dad and he tried not to stutter as he went on. "I am doing better. Dw...uh...um..." He glanced away for a second and clicked his tongue before he tried again. "Mister Dwicky took me outside a couple of times and I was alright." He refused to mention what happened at the park. That would just make things worse. "I think if I was to go back to skool, I would actually enjoy it."

Membrane glanced sideways at Dib, taking in everything the boy said. His expression never really changed much throughout the conversation. "Well, it's good that you're willing to try. I'm still a little concerned about letting you go back. What with that foreign kid you always got into all those fights with." He shook his head. "That's what put you in the place for good to begin with."

Dwicky finally came out of the kitchen with a cup and saucer in each hand. "We talked about that too, didn't we, Dib?" He handed a cup to Membrane and Dib. "Perhaps it would be better to enroll Dib into another skool. Just avoid the problem altogether. A clean slate. A new start. New, normal friends. He could put all his attention into his studies, get into after skool activities. The sooner, the better, I think." Dwicky knitted his own hands together in front of himself. "Though he needs to be reintroduced to regular social activity, and behavior." He was smiling at Membrane again. "But that's as easily done as taking your son out for quality time, Professor."

Membrane took the cup while only giving a small nod to Dwicky. "Well, it would be a little hard to put him in a different skool. Only certain ones are around our area." He took a small sip from the cup and set it back down before speaking back up again. "Gaz is doing fine in her classes and she has a friend that she's very close to. We would have to move to put him in a different skool, and I don't think that would be quite fair to her."

Dib stared down into his cup as he listened to each word said. Staying in the skool nearby meant staying near Zim. It meant he would actually have to get used to that fact. Such a thing caused him to tense up as he tried to keep his emotions to himself.

Dwicky made a thoughtful sound, rubbing his temple hard in a circular motion with a finger. "Well, to be honest, sir, you should be thinking what's fair for Dib right now. Moving would be the best idea. You'd all be together again, as a family. And isn't that what counts? Dib deserves a second chance, Professor." His hand dropped, but both of them raised to bear their palms up. "If you gave him a moment of your time, you'd see what a great person he is. Talk to him. Get to know him. Spend time with him." Dwicky desperately gestured to Dib.

Dib's head shot up quickly and his eyes moved to Dwicky. The thought of moving scared him. Of course he wanted to get away from Zim, maybe go to a different skool, but not if it meant completely moving away. That meant he would have to leave Dwicky, and he still couldn't grasp that thought. Sadly, he couldn't voice that, all he could do was look back down at his cup and hope his dad disagreed.

"I don't know. I don't want to make things complicated for the whole family by suddenly moving somewhere just because he can't handle a little pressure." Membrane glanced at Dwicky for a second before looking back in front of him. "Staying in the asylum should help him get over all his worries. That's what all the doctors are there for. To help him." He gestured to Dwicky. "That's what you're there for too." His hand dropped back down. "He should be fine going back to any skool once he gets out."

Dwicky's brows rose, wrinkling his forehead. ".. You've never been to a mental hospital, have you?" It was hard not to be frank. "It isn't a healthy environment. Especially if you want to get away from that kind of mind set. It's being out in the sun, being around _normal_ people that has really made the biggest of improvements in Dib. Sticking him in a padded room, confined inside a jacket and feeding him medication for the rest of his life- that isn't going to make him well. The doctors have hundreds of other patients to deal with. And there's only so much I can do." Dwicky gestured to Membrane, pleading for sympathy from the man. "You have to help too, Professor. Take him outside. Do something with him. Show him some affection. Because I'm seeing more neglect than insanity."

Membrane turned narrowed eyes on Dwicky at that last statement. "Neglect?" He set the cup he was holding aside so he could turn around to face Dwicky. "I have never neglected my son. I'm trying to help him. All of his ramblings about nonsense, I'm trying to snap him out of that. I may have gotten sick of it myself, but I still put him in that place because I was hoping to help him get better." He pointed a finger at Dwicky as his eyes narrowed more. "Wanting him to get better is not neglect."

Dib turned his eyes to his dad as a frown crossed his face. He lifted one hand up to lower the other's hand. "Dad, please stop." Just as quickly he pulled his own hand back, ignoring the small glance the other sent his way and instead looking back down at his cup.

"Not visiting him for three years and counting isn't?" Dwicky bit his tongue, his tone was getting sharp and accusing. He couldn't act like this and expect to get anywhere. It would only make Membrane mad, and there would be no progress just arguing, which would only tear Dib up. Dwicky shook his head; the move made him dizzy. The extra painkillers he'd taken in the kitchen plus the ones he took earlier were catching up with him, but the medicating calm did little for his already waning patience.

"Please, Professor Membrane.. he's your son. You have to be a father first, then a world renowned scientist. Take Dib with you today, take him out and spend some time with him, okay? As his counselor I'm prescribing this as necessary for his recovery: regulated visits. You are obligated, Professor." Dwicky's stern expression faded a little. "Please." His brows furrowed completely; he just wanted Membrane to understand.

Membrane sat back a bit and let out another harsh sigh. His eyes moved back to Dib and he stared at the boy for a bit before his eyes fell to the floor. "I guess I could take him out for a bit. It would give me a chance to see how well he really is, and to see how he does outside." He barely glanced back to Dib. "I suppose it really couldn't hurt."

Dib lifted his head back up. It was easy to tell he was at least a little excited at the idea of going back outside. Especially going outside with his dad. Just to have some attention from one of the people he wanted it from most caused a small smile to come to his face. "Really?" At the small nod he got from his dad the grin on his face grew.

Dwicky stared a moment, completely amazed that Membrane had actually agreed to the idea. "G-great!" Dwicky couldn't keep the wide smile off his face; he was completely elated beyond words. Years of skooling, the tears, the stress, it was all worth it for this very moment. He nodded. "I'll put a few things in a bag for you, his medication and such. He hasn't had breakfast yet, so, bond over eggs and stuff." Without waiting for either to reply, Dwicky headed to the kitchen to grab Dib's medication first.

Membrane watched Dwicky leave before he turned his eyes back to Dib, one of them narrowing a bit. "Try to be on your best behavior when we go out. Mister Dwicky did say you do fine when you're outside so I want to be able to see that, alright?" He turned his eyes away and looked around. "What do you do while you're over here anyway?"

Dib nodded quickly, much more eager than he had been earlier. "I will. You'll see that I'm really doing better." The sudden question caught him off guard and what colour was even in his face drained away. "D-Do?" He looked around at anything but the other person on the couch. "W-Well, um, sometimes I watch TV." He bit at his lip. "I-It's just somewhere for me to relax."

Out of the corner of his eye Dib saw Dwicky leaving the kitchen with his medication and Skeets in hand before disappearing into his bedroom.

Membrane looked back at Dib. "You're able to relax here? In a complete stranger's home?" He shook his head and turned his eyes to the blank screen of the TV. "I can't really say I understand that." His foot began to tap at the floor as he started to become impatient.

Dib looked down at his lap. "He's not really a stranger, Dad." He moved one of his hands up to fidget with the end of his shirt. "He's been helping me get better. I feel much better here and outside than I do in my room at the asylum."

Membrane nodded his head just a bit at those words. A small sound came from him signaling he had at least heard Dib before he actually spoke. "If you say so, son." That earned a small sigh from Dib.

"Hey Dib! Could you help me in here a moment?" Dwicky's voice called from inside his bedroom.

The sudden shout startled Dib for a moment. Once he remembered how to move, he got up off the couch, glancing sideways at his father. "I-I'll be right back." He only got a small nod from his dad, but that was enough for him. He turned and headed towards Dwicky's bedroom, stopping inside near the doorway once he finally got there. "What do you need?"

The boy was suddenly yanked over from the door way, grinning lips murmuring a 'Shhh' before they were pressed affectionately to Dib's. Still Dwicky couldn't keep from grinning wider, breaking the kiss as silently as he could. "Congratulations." he leaned closer to whisper the words against Dib's ear.

The kiss surprised Dib, but that one word caused the smile to return to his lips. He couldn't help the giddy feeling that was taking him over. He had wanted to do this earlier and couldn't: he let his arms circle around Dwicky so he could cling to the man tightly. "Thank you." The whispered words were really meant for so much more than just that moment.

Dwicky hugged the boy tightly to himself, muffling a small sound against the crook of Dib's neck. He just held Dib, swaying a little. It was going to be okay. It really was. When he did pull back a little, his smile never faltered as he looked down at Dib. "So, you wanted to pack the blue sweatshirt?" he spoke up in a more normal tone so Dib's father wouldn't be wondering. "Though I think it's going to be a pretty sunny day." His smile softened with those words.

Dib's own smile never left his face and it was pretty hard for him to stand still even as he answered Dwicky. "I guess I could go without it. I would probably just regret taking it if it gets too hot." Even with the veil of words, he still cuddled his head against Dwicky's chest for the moment, wanting to continue sharing his good mood with the other as best he could.

"I'll put it in the bag anyway. You never know. Better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it." Dwicky rested his cheek atop the boy's head, closing his eyes for but a few seconds. He buried his face in Dib's dark hair to whisper "You'll do great." He pressed a few silent kisses before standing straight. "Anything else you want to bring?" he spoke in a normal tone again with a grin, rubbing both hands up and down Dib's back.

The whispered words caused Dib to hug Dwicky just a bit more. When Dwicky pulled back, he looked up at the man with a small smile before he spoke up. "Just Skeets. That's the most important thing I want to bring. You didn't pack him up yet, did you?" The hands on his back had him letting out a sigh. If all of the nervous feelings from earlier hadn't already left, then they were at that moment.

"No. He's on the bed." Dwicky actually pointed to the bed where the stuffed toy sat by a duffel bag. "Hmmm. I think that's it. Maybe a change of clothes." He lowered his head to lean it against Dib's still smiling. He then bridged that small gap and kissed Dib one final time, brushing a few fingers through the boy's hair affectionately.

Dib returned the kiss, letting one of his hands move up higher on Dwicky's shirt to grip at the fabric. When it was finally broken, he stayed near just so he could whisper his words again. The same three simple words he had spoken over and over again so many times at the asylum. "I'll miss you." He gave a tiny smile.

"I'll miss you too, kiddo." Dwicky whispered as quietly as he could, and he gave a small chuckle after. He then drew away from Dib so he could actually pack what he'd been saying he had already done.

Dib's smile grew a bit at the nickname. He walked towards the bed and grabbed Skeets, hugging the plush to his chest as soon as he had it. With that, he finally walked out of the bedroom and back out towards the living room to keep his dad company once more, plopping down on the couch when he got there. "Sorry about that. Packing and all that."

Membrane, who had gone to fidgeting with the TV remote, quickly turned his eyes to Dib and set the remote aside. "That's alright." His eyes moved down to the plush Dib held so tightly, and for a few moments he stayed silent before he finally pointed to it. "Have you always had that?"

Dib clutched Skeets tighter while he tried to think of a way to answer the question. "No, I got it the first time I went out." He eased up when the other seemed satisfied with that answer and loosened his grip on Skeets. The silence after gave him a chance to look at the sudden mess his dad had made of the remote.

Dwicky soon emerged, moving to hand the duffel back to Dib. "There you go. All set." His wide smile soon faltered as he blinked down at his disassembled TV controller. "What'd you do to my remote?" He blinked several times more

Membrane looked from Dwicky then back to the remote. "Oh, that? Just messed around with a few of the chips inside. Nothing really major. It's easy to put back together, don't worry." He stood up from the couch and straightened his coat out.

Dib gave a small sigh and shook his head. Despite how long he had been away from his family, even after so many years, his dad was still the same. The man still felt the need to tinker with everything he could get his hands on. He stood up from the couch as well while he slung the duffel bag over a shoulder. He moved his eyes towards Dwicky and gave the man an apologetic glance while mouthing a 'sorry' while his dad's head was turned.

Dwicky held up the two pieces of casing from what was once his controller, guts hanging out of one end. He stared at the rather complicated mess of wires, chips and pieces still laying on his couch. "Easy to.. put back?" he quietly squeaked to himself. He gave up and just dropped it back on the couch while giving Dib an 'it's alright' sort of smile.

"I'll let you out." Dwicky dusted his hands off and walked the two the short distance to the door, opening and holding it open for them. "It was really nice to talk to you again, Professor Membrane. I'm really glad you stopped by." He gave the Professor a cheerful smile.

Membrane only nodded his head at the words while walking out into the hallway. Once Dib was outside with him he turned back to the door and gave a small sigh. "I suppose I should thank you for taking care of my son. If everything is going as well as you put it than I guess I owe a bit of gratitude towards you." He turned his attention back on Dib. "Come on, let's go." He began walking away from the door towards the elevator.

"Coming!" Dib said the words in a hurried voice just so his dad wouldn't leave him. Before he followed after, he turned his eyes back to Dwicky and waved at the man for a few quick seconds. His eyes darted towards his dad and saw the professor's attention was elsewhere. He gave a small grin and blew a quick kiss to Dwicky before he darted off towards the elevator.

Dwicky caught the kiss and smiled all the more. He was so happy to see Dib getting what he finally wanted. He waved after Dib. "Bye! Have fun!" He watched the two go into the elevator as it arrived. Only when the door closed after them did Dwicky spin around. Throwing his arms into the air victoriously, he gave a joyous squeal. He swayed his hips from side to side and strutted back into the apartment. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! The king of counseling!" He promptly shut the door after himself.


	24. Sessions 24

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dwicky and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 24

It was much later in the day, and with that, much of the activity outside began to quiet down. Most people were heading home to get ready for the work the next day brought much work. Inside one particular apartment building though, elevator doors opened and allowed one person who seemed much happier than the world outside to come out.

"Come on, Dad. Hurry up," Dib's voice sounded in the small hallway as he tried his best to hurry towards a particular door. All of the walking had killed his leg, but he was ignoring it completely just for the sake of going to tell one person the good news.

Membrane walked slowly out of the elevator. Not seeing the big fuss of the situation, he stated, "I still don't understand why we couldn't just use the phone." He let out a tired sigh and shifted the weight of the bag on his shoulder. "I have one with me we could have used. I'm sure Mister Dwicky doesn't want to be bothered with small things all the time." Membrane didn't see the small grin Dib tried to hide as the boy knocked hard at door 312.

The loud knock had the person so happily sound asleep suddenly bolting awake. Dwicky made a small surprised noise. His hair was frazzled and falling over his eyes. Spending so much time with Dib made him a light and anxious sleeper. Quickly he looked around, but only heard another hard knock. Of course there was no Dib. Dib was out with his dad.

Dwicky moved to get out of the bed, but the sheets tangled around his legs sending him face first into the floor. He groaned and kicked the blankets away, scurrying back up to stand; his good mood completely unshakable.

Walking to the door and looking through the peep hole had his smile faltering. Dib wasn't supposed to be back yet. Though the boy did have the widest smile: it would split his face in two if it got any wider. Smoothing down his hair and shirt, Dwicky unlocked and opened the door. Smiling for both visitors he responded, "Hey. Back so soon, you two?"

Dib had to stop himself from clinging to Dwicky right there and then. He wanted so bad to just blurt what he had to say out, but it would probably be a better idea to get out of the hall. He gave a small nod instead to Dwicky's question; his smile never leaving his face as he did. "We have something to tell you." With that he eagerly made his way inside the apartment.

Membrane gave a small huff at his son's manners and narrowed one of his eyes. "Now wait a minute..." Seeing that he wasn't even being listened to, he gave a small sigh and instead looked back to Dwicky. "Sorry about this." He looked over to Dib, who had turned to look back at them. "And that. His manners need work it seems." Dib's smile never fell away.

"It's alright." Dwicky gave a slight chuckle and gestured inside. "Come in, come in." He gestured for Membrane to follow Dib's lead. He closed the door after the other came in, and followed them into the living room. "Can I get you two anything? A drink? More tea?" He clasped his hands together and gave a slight nervous laugh at just how scarily eager he was last time they had graced his company.

Membrane dropped Dib's bag on the couch and shook his head to each. "No, that's alright. We only came by because he wanted to tell you what I still think could have been told over the phone." He looked back to Dib. "It would have saved some people a lot of time."

Dib quickly shook his head at that as he tried his best to quit bouncing on his feet. "I told you he would more than likely want to know in person. He has been helping me a lot, Dad." He turned his eyes to Dwicky and couldn't stop grinning even if he tried. "It's really good news. I think it would be wasted if it was shared over the phone."

Dwicky couldn't help but smile as well; Dib's excitement was catchy, and, well, addictive. He glanced at Membrane before looking back to Dib. His heart beat quickened and his knitted hands tightened in anticipation of what could have Dib grinning from ear to ear. "You definitely have my attention" he couldn't help but grin "What's the good news?" He held his breath, trying to keep his hopes down.

Membrane raised a brow before he finally let out a sigh. He looked away and shrugged. "Well, you're the one that wanted us to come all the way back here. You may as well tell him yourself."

That was all Dib needed to finally blurt out what he had been holding in the entire time. "Dad decided to give me a chance and is going to let me out of the asylum." He wrung his hands in front of himself feeling much too fidgety at the moment. "He was actually impressed with how I acted today." He turned his eyes to his dad. Getting a quick nod from the man, he turned them back to Dwicky.

Dwicky's heart stopped dead in his chest and he almost fell flat over. He placed a hand on his chest, grounding his feet to keep from leaping over to the boy with a gleeful sound and smothering him senseless with his affection. Instead he gave a wide, giddy grin, trying to contain his elation. He failed miserably at it. "That's- that's..." There were no words to describe, and Dwicky couldn't help but laugh. "That's great to hear!" He stuck out his hand towards Dib's to shake. "Congratulations! You've earned it."

Dib looked down at Dwicky's hand and realized he should probably shake it. He quickly moved a hand up to clasp around the man's own. "T-Thanks." He wanted to do more than just shake hands at that moment. He realized he had probably kept his hand in the other's longer than needed, and quickly took it back while giving a small smile.

"See, no big need for a visit. That was simple." Membrane turned his eyes to Dwicky and gave another small sigh. "Although I must admit you were right. He seems to be a different person outside. Anything that happened between Gaz and him... I saw nothing of that happening again." He gave a simple shrug. "I suppose you did well in helping him."

Dwicky walked over to Membrane and grinned at the other man; he was quite ecstatic. He stuck out his hand for Membrane to shake. "Thank you, Professor. I knew if you saw things for yourself you'd understand. That's all it took. I'm so glad. For both of you." His grin grew wider. "I know things can only get better now." He made a happy noise. It was hard enough to keep it all in, especially since he wanted to give a round of hugs to everyone, and anyone.

Membrane took a step back from Dwicky. The other man's sudden behavior had him feeling a bit uneasy, but he still took the other's hand and shook it for a quick second before letting go. "Yes, well, we can only hope." He gave a quick glance to Dib before he looked back to Dwicky. "We'll test this out and see how well he does. That also means..." He turned his attention on the both of them. "...he won't be needing therapy anymore."

Dib's smile immediately dropped from his face at that. "W-What?" His eyes darted back and forth between his dad and Dwicky so many times he thought his head would spin. In the end they settled on Dwicky as he bit his lip as if pleading with the man to do something.

Dwicky glanced at Dib then at Professor Membrane. Cooly he scratched the back of his head giving a thoughtful expression. "Are you sure that's wise, Professor, to cut therapy so abruptly, especially when putting him in a new environment? There are still things to go over, new things to wade through. Dib will still need counseling. Someone to talk about the new things he's going to be going through. It wouldn't be a good idea for Dib to deal with everything all at once. It would be rather overwhelming." Dwicky nodded in agreement with himself. "Just until he can handle things on his own, but knowing Dib," he smiled the boy's way, "it shouldn't be all that long. He's a strong kid; smart, a quick learner." Dwicky tried not to smile so slyly at that.

That last part caused Dib to bow his head as he tried really hard to hide the blush on his cheeks. One of his hands moved up to rub at his arm as he once again tried to stop himself from being fidgety.

Membrane turned his full attention back on Dwicky at the man's words. Each statement had his eyes narrowing and a thoughtful noise coming from him. "I guess all of that is true. If he's still able to talk about what's troubling him, then maybe I won't have to worry about placing him back in there." He turned his full attention on Dib which caused the boy to look back up. "Although I don't really want to trouble you with him anymore. I'm sure you have other clients as well. I really don't want him to take up all of your time."

Dwicky gave a slight quiet laugh. He waved a hand dismissively. "Oh, really, it's no trouble, Professor. I enjoy working with Dib." He looked back at Dib. "He's energetic, open-minded, and always willing to try new things." Dwicky cleared his throat as he looked back at the Professor. "I did originally ask to work with Dib to help him. So you're not imposing, Professor." He smiled after that.

Membrane looked between the two of them for a moment before he finally gave in with a small nod. "If you really are okay with it, then I guess I see nothing wrong with it." He moved one of his hands inside the pocket of his coat. "As long as he is able to become completely well." He turned his eyes on Dib. "Well, we told him. I should probably take you home. I have to get things settled with the asylum and everything."

"No!" The sudden shout from Dib caused his dad to look at him strangely. "Um...I mean...I should stay here." He looked back and forth between the two of them before his eyes settled back on his dad. "I just sort of feel like talking about what happened today. And stuff." That earned him another look from his dad which only caused him to shrug.

"It's alright, Professor. It's a big life change for Dib. A change for the better. I'm sure he has some things he wants to sort out and talk about." Dwicky gave a reassuring smile. "You could pick him up later or I could even drop him off. Whichever is best for you, of course, Professor." He couldn't have smiled more pleasantly if he tried.

Membrane looked thoughtful for a moment, or as thoughtful as he could behind goggles and a lab coat. After a few moments he gave a slight nod before speaking, "Fine, he can stay here and sort out whatever he needs to. If you could bring him by whenever he's finished, then that would be helpful." He looked over at Dib, trying to look as stern as he could. "Be on your best behavior."

"I will be, don't worry." Dib tried hard to keep the grin off his face, but it was hard. So instead, he looked down at his shirt, toying with the end of it as he tried to get the attention off of himself.

Dwicky nodded. "Well, I'm glad everything is ordered and settled." He beamed smiles all around. "And thank you, Professor, for giving Dib a second chance. I'm sure he'll make you proud." He gestured towards the front door. "I'll see you out then." He walked Membrane to the door, trying to be less eager and impatient as he possibly could. Opening the door for the other man, he smiled again.

Membrane gave a small nod to each word spoken while he walked to the door. When he got out to the hall he turned to Dwicky once again. "Don't hesitate to call if he's any trouble. Despite him finally being out I'm still a little worried." He glanced back in the apartment for only a small second before he shrugged his shoulders and turned away from the other. "Either way, I will see both of you later." With that, he started down the hall towards the elevator.

Dwicky gave a wave, "Yes, sir. Buh-bye." With a quick step back he closed and locked the door. Leaning against it heavily, he gave a most giddy laugh. "Oh, man. I can't believe I just talked your dad into 'counseling' you." He gave the quotey fingers with the word. "You're sane. You're out. I really shouldn't be on the pay roll for licking his son." He truly gaped then, he couldn't believe it-- Dib was out! His legs almost wanted to give from below him.

Dib came near, stopping just a few feet in front of Dwicky. The grin that he had tried to hide before was finally allowed to show on his face and he definitely couldn't stop it at the other's words. "Well, if you're good at it then why not?" He kept his gaze on Dwicky for a few more seconds and he couldn't help the small laugh that came from him as he watched the man. "I told you it was good news."

"That's better than good news-!" Dib was suddenly yanked forward and against Dwicky, clutched possessively with one hand at the boy's rear. Dwicky wasted no time pressing a heated kiss to Dib's lips. He turned around and thudded Dib's back against the wall, pressing up against the boy. He broke the kiss with a breathless laugh. "That's excellent!" Dwicky kissed Dib's cheek. "No- that's amazing!" He then kissed Dib's brow. "No- awesome!" Then the boy's forehead. "Mind blowing!" Then the bridge of Dib's nose, and ending with a giddy laugh.

The kiss and sudden switch up against the wall had left Dib a bit breathless. So, while Dwicky kissed his face he stared cross-eyed at the man as he tried to figure out which way was up again. At the man's words, he couldn't help but let out another small laugh, finding the excitement easily contagious. "I knew you would like it." He lifted his arms up to wrap them around Dwicky's neck. "No more worries. I get to be normal now." The grin returned to his face. "Or, as normal as certain things can get."

Dwicky stole another kiss, lingering a moment before breaking it. "I'm so proud of you. How'd you do it? What did you two do? Was it fun?" He pressed his hands to the door so he could lean over Dib, practically bouncing with excitement. "Tell me, tell me, tell me."

Dib muffled a small moan during the kiss, and after it was broken, the grin was right back on his face. It was much too amusing watching Dwicky act like a little kid. "We actually had a pretty good time." He shook his head at his own words. "Well, as good as it can get while hanging around my dad." He leaned forward the short distance between them so he could lean over and lick at Dwicky's throat, only stopping for a quick moment so he could speak again. "We got food then I talked him into going to a movie." He kissed at the other's skin a few times. "It was something boring, but I think the fact I actually sat still amazed him."

Dwicky made a happy squeal, stealing up Dib's lips again, caught between kissing the boy breathless with excitement and wanting to hear more. "You are amazing. Professor Membrane is one tough customer to sell." Dwicky grinned wide, licking his own lips. "I'm in awe." He sneaked his arms back around Dib, letting them slip extraordinarily low. "Complete awe." His grin grew more interested. "Go on. Tell me the whole story." He dipped his head down, kissing down to Dib's ear where he playfully licked and bit; giving Dib no real mercy to think or speak.

Dib couldn't help the loud moan that escaped him. He tried his best to speak afterwards, but all the treatment really wouldn't let him do anything except lean more into it. Every time he opened his mouth, only whimpers and small needy sounds came out. So instead, he moved a hand down to grip at Dwicky's shirt. He just barely managed to even get one small word moaned out. "Can't..."

Dwicky grinned with the ear in his mouth. He wetly pulled it from his mouth and chuckled low in his throat. "Too bad. You have to try. Because I'm not going to stop." He lightly bit down the boy's neck, but it was at the crook of his neck where he clamped his mouth down, biting down and grazing teeth, sucking at the skin there.

Dib tried to narrow his eyes on Dwicky, but the look was lost as soon as the man bit down on his neck. He let out another small noise and gripped Dwicky's shirt tighter. His face buried in the other's shoulder as he tried to get a hold of himself enough to speak. It wasn't an easy thing to do. "W-When we left, he t-took me to get something t-to eat." He swallowed hard before he went on. "He told m-me about th-things that had been happening at home and w-wondered what exactly I had b-been doing to get better."

That had Dwicky pull away, lapping at the bruised skin before he grinned down at Dib, chuckling rather immaturely. "And what did you say to that?" He slipped down lower so he could kiss under the boy's jaw, giving the ticklish spots a lick before biting a kiss on the front of Dib's throat.

Dib moved his hands up just so he could run them through Dwicky's hair. A few of his fingers pulled at the strands, but he didn't even seem to realize that he was doing it; he was too focused on Dwicky's actions and trying to form words. "I just told h-him that I had been doing a f-few activities to help k-keep my head clear." He grinned weakly after that. "He was satisfied."

Dwicky hummed against Dib's throat. He bit the skin, but softly licked it in apology before raising his head to look at Dib. He couldn't help the amused grin. "And is your head clear?" He pressed wet lips against Dib's, groaning softly in a slow kiss. When he pulled away he had lazy amusement on his face. "Now?"

Dib blinked his eyes a few times as he tried to focus once again. A small grin once more came over his face as his hands dropped back down around Dwicky's neck. "Hmm, I don't know. I may need a bit more treatment." He moved one of his hands away so he could press it against the side of his head. "I think I feel some of the insanity coming back." His grin grew more playful before he pulled Dwicky in for a slow kiss.

"Mmm." Dwicky murmured against Dib's lips "Easily remedied." He pressed back into the kiss, licking the other's lips and teeth with leisure. His hands slipped down along the boy's sides and under his shirt, dragging nails less gently than he normally would have across skin. It all felt so good, everything that had happened, it was all worth this.

The nails on his skin caused Dib to tense up and let out a muffled sound against Dwicky's lips. His tongue moved out to curl around the other's before his teeth just barely nipped at it. The entire time he tried not to grin. His own hands moved up to once more run through the man's hair, tugging a bit harder as he pressed closer to the taller body and away from the wall.

Dwicky suddenly paused and broke the kiss, epiphany blatantly written on his face. "We should celebrate!" He looked down at Dib whose hands were still in his hair. "We should completely celebrate, Dib! This is a celebratory event! You're out! You're _finally_ out!" He couldn't help the excited laugh. "We should, um... uh.. buy a cake or- something."

The sudden break from the kiss surprised Dib, and he blinked up at Dwicky. It took him a few moments to figure out what the other was talking about, and when he did, he only gave a small smirk. He let his hands pull Dwicky's head back down so he could lick at the man's ear. "We're celebrating just fine." He let his tongue trail down to the gold stud and flicked his tongue around it before he just barely bit down.

"Aw but- but- the cayyyy-ouuuwww." Dwicky melted, against his will, back down to Dib. He couldn't resist it when Dib did _that_. "Damnit." He slunk his arms back around Dib, running his hands up and down along the boy's back. "We- we gotta do something special." He couldn't help the pout despite the low throaty sound.

Dib nibbled a bit at Dwicky's ear while he let his tongue roll around the stud. As his attention was focused on, he listened to what the other said. Soon a small grin spread on his lips that could easily be felt. He took the lobe between his lips and sucked at it for a few seconds before he pulled back just a bit. "Special..." He flicked his tongue along the rim. "I agree. We should." The words were almost purred as he attacked the other's ear once more, sucking at the small spot he had just licked.

Dwicky whimpered, really at a loss for control. He rested his head down against Dib's shoulder. "You really shouldn't do _that_ kinda thing to cake." He sighed, letting his eyes fall shut as he bit and tugged on Dib's shirt. His hands slipped under the boy's shirt, sneaking under the waist of pants, much too low to be chaste.

Dib let out a low moan at the feel of hands on his skin. Despite the muffled sound, he still didn't let go of Dwicky's ear, and only gave a small, amused noise at the other's words. He bit down lightly once more on Dwicky's ear before he trailed his tongue down towards his neck and kissed at the skin there.

Dwicky murmured Dib's name, a moan against the boy's shoulder, digging fingers into skin and tugging the boy closer. He paused a moment, pulling back just enough so he could look down at Dib with a bit of sly amusement. "Hey, Dib, raise your arms up a moment."

Dib had only given a slight noise while he was pulled nearer and gazed up at Dwicky with a curious expression when the other moved back. The look on Dwicky's face had him easily giving into the small command; he lifted his arms up.

Dwicky's hands slipped up from Dib's pants and grabbed the bottom of Dib's shirt. In one quick motion he yanked the shirt up and off the boy. "Yoink!" He backpedaled some, clutching the shirt to his person as he gave a teasing grin. "Mine now."

It took a few seconds for Dib to actually realize what happened, and when he did, he let out a small yelp. "H-Hey!" He moved towards Dwicky and tried his best to grab at the shirt. "Give it back." A small pout formed on his lips after a few moments. "That's not fair." He glared up at the other.

Dwicky couldn't keep the laughter in, though he knew it was mean to tease. "Aww. You're so short. And I'm so tall." He held the shirt up above his own head where Dib couldn't reach at all. "It's so cute." He ruffled the boy's hair and chuckled teasingly.

Dib's expression grew worse at the teasing, but just as quickly a small grin came to his lips. One of his hands moved up to grab at the one top of his head just so he could bring one of Dwicky's fingers to his lips. "You're not being very nice." With that, he moved his tongue out to lick at the tip of the finger before he moved his lips down around it.

"Uhgnn.. now _that_ isn't fair." Dwicky shifted but still held the shirt up high. "That's cheating." He tried to back away as much as he could without actually pulling his hand away. He made another breathy sound low in his throat, and his brows furrowed as he bit his lip.

Dib pulled his mouth away for only a small moment, but let his lips still press against the tip of Dwicky's finger as he spoke. "It's not cheating at all." He moved his tongue back around the digit, moving it down before he bit playfully at it. While he did that, his other hand reached out to slip up Dwicky's shirt, moving fingers along the man's stomach.

"H-hey! You can't seduce me." Dwicky couldn't help but squirm, giving a small laugh. "I'm suppose to be the seducer." Without realizing how far he had moved, his back thudded into a wall and he gave a small 'oof'. "Topless and doing _that_ - that should be illegal." Dwicky leaned heavily against the wall. "That mouth should be illegal." His finger curled slightly in Dib's mouth, running a fingertip down touch to teeth.

Dib bit at the tip of the finger as it grazed his teeth before giving a small grin as he pulled his mouth back once more. "I'm only topless because someone stole my shirt." He gave another quick lick to the long digit. "Besides, you don't seem to mind my mouth." He let his eyes move up to glance at Dwicky a quick moment before he looked back down. His mouth moved back around the tip of the other's finger and further down as he sucked and bit at the skin.

Dwicky couldn't help the slow, interested grin that spread on his lips; the vicarious symbolism was just a little too much to keep things innocent in his mind. He rested the boy's shirt on his shoulder so he could rest his hand on Dib's, running fingers through the boy's hair, then down the other's naked chest. "...I think I want your pants too," he mused in a low tone.

Dib gave a low sound around the finger in his mouth as the hand ran down his chest. He gave another quick glance up at Dwicky when he heard the words, and couldn't help the grin that came to his lips. He slowly pulled his lips away while giving one last quick lick. "So, take them." The words had a playful tone to them.

"I can't." Dwicky's eyes sifted halfway shut as he settled them heavily on Dib. It was then a playful and suggestive grin slowly smoothed itself across his lips. "Not unless you're laying down," his voice was husky and low. He tossed the shirt on his shoulder aside, not caring where it fell. He placed his hands on Dib's shoulders, and kneaded the tense muscles there before pushing the boy, backing him up down from the area at the front door, towards his bedroom.

Dib allowed himself to be pushed back while letting his hands fall back down to his sides. Even as he was being walked backwards that still didn't stop him from moving a hand back up to pull Dwicky's head down so he could steal a few quick kisses. Each one didn't last long enough, but he didn't stop there, biting at the man's lip afterwards as they made it into the bedroom.

Dwicky's grin only broadened before he finally captured up the boy's quick lips. He pressed a proper deep kiss there with a low sensual sound. He tugged Dib against him, fingers dragged their need across skin until they reached the waist of the boy's pants. With a few tries, he managed to kick the door closed after him.

Although the door was closed, things were less than quiet.


	25. Sessions 25

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM! We just want to borrow Dwicky and Dib for a fic, so calm yourselves.

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** moon-glaive

Chapter 25

Time really meant nothing to one certain fourteen-year-old. Whether it was day or night, night or day, Dib really didn't care. He had been too busy slipping in and out of sleep to really take notice of the time that was on the small digital clock. The numbers would have been too blurry anyway as his glasses had been tossed away somewhere amidst the clothes. Instead, he curled closer to the body that lay beside him and ignored everything else around him. One of his feet drew up to move along a leg that wasn't his own before he actually settled down, giving a small noise as he did as he gave up on sleep.

It was easy to tell the other wasn't asleep, when a lazy hand ran down Dib's side, smoothing across the side of hips, fingers spreading before it crossed to tailbone and lower; the touch was innocent in its affections. The hand came to rest finally at the small of Dib's back and Dwicky gave a comfortable exhale that ruffled the boy's already mussed hair. He wasn't thinking about when they'd have to move, when he'd have to take a shower, dress and take the boy home. Home was a good place to be. It wasn't the asylum. A room, with a real bed, a real window on a wall and not a door, no padded walls, no cold tile. A family to take care of him, instead of orderlies and doctors constantly injecting him with needles when he had nightmares.

It was going to be Dib's first overnight in his real home. His first night away from him, but Dwicky pushed the ill thoughts away and let the wonderful feeling of comfortable lethargy win him over. He ran his fingers through Dib's dark hair, still damp with perspiration, running it down to rest at the back of the boy's head. He planted a long lingering kiss at the side of the boy's head. "I'm happy for you," he murmured there, his voice quiet and husky from abuse. And he truly was, in every meaning and in every fiber of his being.

As much as Dib was trying to give up on sleep, each touch across his skin and through his hair wasn't really helping. He felt like dozing off once again and just forgetting about the fact that he had to eventually get out of bed. It was the small words that had his eyes trying to open once more to small slits. As he glanced at Dwicky, he kept his head rested on the other's chest. "I think by now I would be a little worried if you weren't." He gave a weak smile, his own words just as low. He let his eyes close, but didn't try to fall back to sleep, still speaking up after. "We can still try to get a cake if you really want to." He couldn't help but grin a little bit.

That suddenly struck Dwicky as terribly hilarious and he shook with giddy laughter. He put a hand to his mouth to try and stifle the laughter, but it only continued, muffled and snorted. With a completely wide grin he moved to encircle his arms around Dib, burying his face in the boy's hair, a muffled and amused sound there. "That figurative cake was for you, not me." He buried his nose in Dib's hair, inhaling deeply and exhaling warmly against the boy's scalp. "Mmmm, Dib." he spoke more to himself, completely good exactly as he was.

Dwicky's laughter only caused Dib to grin a bit wider. He easily cuddled closer to the other as he was held, letting out a small noise at the same time. His eyes opened back up just a bit as he heard his name, but he didn't speak. Instead, one of his hands moved up so he could trace a finger on Dwicky's chest. He stayed content just as he was for a few moments before he tried to speak once more, despite how tired he seemed. "Do you think I'll be able to handle everything?"

The man rested his cheek atop Dib's head so he could talk. "That's a rather silly question to ask me." Dwicky immediately answered in good humor; it was blatantly obvious from his tone that he did believe so.

"Hmm, maybe." Dib gave a small smile while he slowly gave up on the random pattern he was making and let his arm drape across Dwicky's side. "It's hard to believe. I'm expecting something horrible and evil to pop out of nowhere, and the good to turn to bad at any moment." What nails he had left moved across Dwicky's back as he went on. "That's usually how it happens." He gave a tiny, thoughtful sound. "I guess that means everything really is okay, if at least a little bit."

"It does. It means you're well on your way to a full recovery." Dwicky mused a little, "In a proper world, you wouldn't be needing me anymore. Maybe once or twice a week, moving onto once a month, bi-yearly, to nothing. But these are special circumstances." He grinned haphazardly. "You'll be going to skool soon. Man, skool. Feels like yesterday I was working there." He gently tugged at the scythe-lock of hair; messy and crooked, he toyed with it. "It's too bad I don't. That way I could keep an eye on you. Be there for you." Dwicky's grin only grew and he shifted, dipping his head to place a few playful kisses on Dib's neck, the skin already bruised there. "And 'be there for you'," he added more suggestively.

Dib gave a low sound as the abused skin was kissed, causing him to squirm just a bit under the blanket. At Dwicky's words he gave a lazy grin and shook his head just a bit. "That's why I'll be coming here to bug you, so that you can still be here for me as much as I need you to be." He moved up a bit so he could wrap both of his arms around Dwicky's neck, placing a kiss on the man's lips before he spoke again. "It will be such a quick process. All I have to say is 'Hey, Dad, I need to go talk to Mister Dwicky about stuff.' He'll say okay and everything will be much easier." His grin grew a bit. "The stuff can come first, talking later."

Dwicky's grin was far from mature. "I like 'stuff'." His arms encircled the boy's lower waist, though his hands wouldn't keep still on Dib's hips, grazing palms against the smooth skin. "Mm. I like _stuff_ a lot." He leaned down to press a slower kiss on Dib's lips, taking lazy enjoyment in the action. He was grinning again as he pulled away. "But in all seriousness, the talking comes first before 'stuff'. As alluring and sexy as your 'stuff' is, I still have a profession to maintain. As well as a boy's mind to keep sane. You still need to talk, discuss what's on your mind, delve into your psyche and make sure everything stays this perfect." Dwicky tweaked his grin, leaning his head back a bit on the pillow to look at Dib better. "But you're very distracting." He relented a hand to smooth back the dark hair that fell over Dib's brow. "It's been a while since we've had a session. A proper session." Dwicky gave a look of seriousness but it was easy to tell he was amused. "You're due for one, kiddo." All the same, he took another slow kiss. "Mmm. Overdue." He added, grinning wider.

Dib gave a weak noise against the kiss and only a small pout when Dwicky pulled away. He finally let out a sigh and nodded his head a bit as he pulled back only a little. "You're right, and I really would be lying if I said I wasn't worried a little bit." He rested his head back down as he spoke. One of his hands trailed down away from Dwicky's neck only to walk down the man's arm. "That's why I asked you if you thought I would be able to handle it all. I'm happy, _really_ happy, don't get me wrong. I guess it's just the fact that a few days out are completely different from being completely out of that place."

"Well then," Dwicky stole Dib's hand to press a kiss or two across the knuckles, "let's have one here. Now. Let's do what your father originally left you here to do." He gave a small laugh, guilty yet giddy at the same time. "Let the load off your shoulders." He followed the arm up and pressed a kiss to Dib's shoulder in gesture. "I promise to be as professional as I can. Here. Naked. With you." He let out an amused sound before he looked as serious as he could towards Dib, but it came out more affectionate than anything else.

Dib glanced up to Dwicky and gave a small smile before he tried to cuddle closer to the other's body. "I had fun with my dad today. I had the attention I wanted for so long even if it was just for a little bit. There were times when I had to make sure he was paying attention, but I didn't mind because he was still listening to me." The sudden worry he was talking about came to show on his face as he went on. "I know when I go home it will be different. He works so much and I'm sure when I go back home it will be the same routine. When I come home from skool I'll be alone with only Gaz to keep me company." His arm moved up to wrap around Dwicky's waist as he clung to the man tightly. "And I still don't know if he believes me about what she did."

Gaz and Tak. Damn it. There was no avoiding it. And Dwicky cursed at himself internally for celebrating too soon, much too soon. It was going to get worse, far worse. And he knew Dib, the boy was going to put up and deal with every little bit of harsh treatment the girls, and Zim was going to put on him just to stay out, and worst of all stay living here- for Dwicky, but there was little time to ready Dib for all of that.

Dwicky tried not to frown, keeping his lips in a professional line. "Your dad will have to sign to an agreement along with your release. Since you will be new to being outside, there's two things that will be mandatory for you at home: routine and supervision. You can't be left alone like you once were, to fend for yourself in the house. He has to be what he signed up for when you were conceived: a father." Dwicky's sigh ruffled Dib's hair. "Don't worry, I wouldn't leave you to the dogs, Dib." He looked down at the boy snuggled tightly to his chest and smiled some. "I'll be making calls to make sure everything runs smoothly."

"Do you think it will work?" Dib moved his head a bit so he could glance up at Dwicky. "I mean, I want to believe he would keep up with such an agreement, but part of me thinks that he would for maybe a few days. After that, things would probably go back to how they were before." He looked back down, staring blankly at nothing in particular. "I know I have you to talk to and that you'll make sure everything is okay. I just wish everyone that is supposed to care, would actually care just as much."

"I know.. but people are their own. And sometimes all we can do is accept things for how they are and move on. Make the best that we can of a situation we are in. As for your dad, it better. I don't want to pull any legal strings, or threaten with the social services card. That time he came over.. I justed to-" Dwicky sharply cleared his throat and gave a small laugh. "Sorry, that wasn't very professional of me to say." He ran his fingers through the boy's hair, petting it idly; they both needed showers. "Just.. -just keep out of your sister's way. And her friend. Avoid them. And.. that other kid." Dwicky's thick brows furrowed. "Four years is a long time to put up with all of it, especially when you've been put away for three years because of it. In my personal opinion Dib, I don't think you should. You shouldn't. Every encounter you've had.." Dwicky's brows raised and his expression went sympathetic but worried as well "..ended very badly."

Dib stayed silent for a long time, although it was obvious he was thinking over what Dwicky said. After a few moments, he grabbed Dwicky's hand in his own and turned it over on the bed to draw the small heart he had drawn before. "I wish I could just forget about all of them. I want us to just be a family like you said we could be, but with no worries." He moved his hand up Dwicky's own and as he said a name he put down one of the man's fingers at a time. "No Dad, no Gaz, no Tak, and no Zim." He let go after the last name and a small frown came to his lips. "But it can't be that simple, and that means I really do just have to learn to deal with everyone, even Zim."

Dwicky stared at his hand, moving the fingers slightly before he placed it against Dib's cheek. "You'll always be welcome here. It's your home too. Anytime, just come here. I'll be here for you." He stroked the boy's cheek with his thumb. "Not just as a counselor, but a friend, and.. more." He wasn't sure what to call this, or Dib; his 'boyfriend'? young 'lover'? his one way ticket to a jail cell? Was this 'dating'? Or- something for life? Was now even the time to be thinking that? Maybe. Big decisions were being made now; life changing ones. For both of them.

"Dib." Dwicky started slowly, so very carefully. He placed his other hand on the boy's other cheek, gaining Dib's full attention with a gentle serious expression. "It's okay.. to move on. I love you, so very, very much. That's why I wouldn't mind if you did move to a new place, a healthier environment, a new start. Away from _them_. It would be good for you. For you, for your family, it would take Gaz away from Tak." Dwicky tried to swallow but the ache was in his chest, not his throat or stomach. He made a small sound. "I'm not trying to push you away, Dib. Far from it.. I'm just.. thinking what would be best for you.. given the situation." Dwicky shook his head a little. "You.. didn't even discuss that option with your dad, did you?"

Dib opened his mouth, but he couldn't say anything and that was enough evidence to prove Dwicky was right. For once he didn't want to keep the eye contact between them and just wanted to look away, but the other's hands on his face prevented him from doing that. "I'm supposed to be better, right? That means I'm supposed to be able to handle anything. Earlier situations shouldn't matter at all. I should be able to forget about them and prove that I'm actually okay." His voice was starting to shake and he was trying his best to control it. He had been so happy earlier and suddenly he just didn't feel so good anymore. "I can't do that if I just up and leave. And even if it was too hard for me to deal with everything, I still refuse to go because I love you just as much as you love me. I don't want to leave you. You helped me even after all the horrible things I said to you when you first came back." He moved a hand up to rub at his eyes after he was done speaking, and tried to keep them averted away from Dwicky as best he could.

Dwicky's brows furrowed more; he hadn't meant to bring Dib down so much, but he should have known better. "Dib, no one is expecting an instantaneous recovery. You're out, yes, you're much better than before, but keep in mind you still need to take careful steps. You can't just jump into things. You need to be patient and pace yourself. You can't do this all at once." He let his hands run down to rest on Dib's shoulders, letting the boy look away if he wanted to. There he softly kneaded the tension that was gathering at the boy's shoulders. He felt horrible for bringing tears to the boy's eyes but he felt that some things just needed to be said, even if it was hurtful. Healing hurt. "It was just an idea to help. Dib, I don't want you to put yourself through anything for me. Your decisions, I want them for yourself, your advantage, your gain." Dwicky swallowed hard, his voice was starting to quiver, and he cleared his throat; it hurt, but this was a good kind of hurt, in the end it would be. "Remember.. that time.. when we talked, when you got your new room.. how you asked if this would all end once you got out. It's my fault for starting this, and it was never my intention to- to.. mix business with pleasure. Everything I've done has been genuine, and for you. Just... humor me, right here and now, and think aloud 'what would be best for me?'" Dwicky stilled, just searching Dib, watching Dib's every motion desperately.

"Getting better and away from what scares me." Dib slowly shook his head before he went on. "I can't get better though if I'm miserable, and being away from you I wouldn't be happy at all." Once more Dib stayed silent as he kept his eyes off of Dwicky. After a few moments a small choked sound came from him before he went on, "You always talked about how you would find some way for us to stay with each other even after I got out." One of his hands moved up to rub at his eyes once more. "If I leave we won't have this anymore. We won't be a family anymore. Liar." He was starting to hurt from all the thoughts.

Dwicky relented, the last word stabbed him deep; that word, it always hurt the most, beyond anything else. He slid his arms back around Dib, hugging him, rubbing a hand against his back in that habit to give comfort. "Families live apart too," he spoke in a small voice. He didn't want to pursue it. "I love you, Dib. Damn if it's right, or legal, I do, and I'm trying. I just want you to be okay again. And.. I'm willing to do and try anything." He tightened his hold on the boy; suddenly it felt like it might be the last time he'd have this. "I know you're open-minded. So, just keep it open for all of this too, okay? I know you have a lot of thinking already to do, just.. don't close any doors." He ran a few fingers through Dib's hair, softly stroking the back of the boy's neck.

Dib buried his face against Dwicky's neck, muttering only a few sounds against the skin. He didn't want to speak up again about any of it, but knew he would have to. Instead of talking for the moment about himself though, he decided to actually ask a question of the other. His head turned just slightly so he could be heard, "Could you deal with it too? If I left, would you be okay with it?" One of his hands twisted at the sheets as he waited for an answer.

The man didn't answer right away, his throat felt too tight. He took in a shaky breath and let it out slowly; it didn't cleanse anything, and he didn't feel any better. "I'd miss you. I'd miss you so very, very much it would hurt. I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't. But.. I would tell myself it was the right thing, and that it was for the best. I'd be happy knowing you were going to be okay." It felt like such an outright lie; so disgustingly romance novel cliché it made Dwicky want to slap himself across the face. But he couldn't speak the deep down, dirty truth, not when so much was on the line. "I'd also probably tie up the phone line, calling so often that your dad would probably question my motives of checking in on my patient." Dwicky tried to give a small chuckle after his words, trying to lighten the mood, but it felt so forced and empty. "I'd visit.. as often as I could. It.. would depend on where you'd move to." Dwicky's voice petered off and he pressed a lingering kiss atop the boy's head, knowing it would only make Dib hurt more from the attachment, making it worse. But at the same time, he just wanted to soothe the boy.

Dib shook his head a little against Dwicky's neck. "If it would hurt both of us, then why should I leave? If I'm willing to try my best and get over the fear I have here in this place, then that should be enough. You always told me you wanted me to try, and that's what I want to do." His hand moved away from the sheets and up to bury itself in Dwicky's hair while he pulled his head back to look the other in the face. "Besides, you were never supposed to leave me and that just means I shouldn't have to leave you either." His gaze dropped down between them as he tried to hide the small noise he made.

Dwicky's heart sank. He couldn't do it, he just couldn't. He couldn't let Dib move away, not because he, himself, would miss the boy so terribly, but because Dib would miss him so much more. Dib's situation, his condition, it would only get worse; loneliness, depression, segregation. The end result of all that was not something Dwicky wanted to even fathom. Dib's hand through his hair had done it.

"I'm just worried you'll have more dreams, hear more things.." Dwicky placed a knuckle under Dib's chin, tilting the boy's head back up. "But we'll face those issues together, right? Step by step." He smiled weakly, but he meant it. "And we won't have to stay here forever." He stroked Dib's jaw with his pointer finger. "You'll tell me everything, right? Keep me well informed of each day, right?"

The words caused Dib to finally give a small smile as he nodded his head in response. "I will. I promise. I'll tell you everything that happens every day." He pulled his hand back to join the other in front of them both as he began to list off the things he could talk about on each finger, "I could tell you about what happened at home. About each friend I made. About how I'm doing in skool." He blinked his eyes as he thought over something. "I doubt you'll want to know what I ate, so I'll skip that." He turned his attention back to Dwicky and wrapped his hand back around the man's neck. "I haven't heard the voices since I had that bad dream. I'm sure I'll be fine."

Dwicky gave a sound nod. "Good." He chuckled some. "Good." He stole a lingering kiss from that smile. "And I'll listen to anything you have to say. _Anything_. Even if it's how much you enjoyed that bologna sammich for lunch." His arms returned around Dib's middle, though his hands wouldn't keep still; each inch, each curve of the boy's skin begged to be touched; and really, he didn't know when he'd be so close, so intimate like this with Dib again. "Just.. remember to take things slow and carefully. Think everything you do carefully, okay? And if you get anxious, or confused, or things start to seem like they were before, just remember what I taught you before. Just think of something that makes you feel happy and safe. List each detail about it, one after the other, concentrate on doing that until you feel better."

"I remember." Dib moved down just a bit so he could bury his face against Dwicky's chest. "I'll try harder to follow that advice. It won't be like all the other times where I listened to what I was told." The hands against his skin caused him to relax more compared to earlier and his voice grew softer. "If the voices ever do come back I won't listen at all. I have a lot of things to be happy about now. It's weird, though. Everything that makes me feel happy just has to do with you." His eyes fell closed, only resting them as he kept talking. "I guess it's because I've been spending most of my time with you since I've been getting better." For a few moments he stayed silent before he spoke up again. His voice smaller. "I really did miss you when you left those years ago. I thought I had found someone that believed me and it hurt a lot when you left. I hoped for a few days that you would come back and still want to help me, but it didn't happen and that's what made me bitter."

Dwicky's throat danced with a guilty swallow, hindering his breath a moment. He rested a cheek atop Dib's head, fingers delving into the hair. "I'm sorry," he spoke so very, very softly; so solemn it hurt. "I really am. But I'm here now.. and I'll make things alright again." He paused to press a delicate kiss where his cheek lay before resting it back again. "I promise," he finished, quieter still.

Dib gave a small nod and his own kiss to Dwicky's chest. "I love you, and whether or not you really meant to mix business with pleasure, as you put it, I'm glad you did." He gave a tiny grin as he glanced back up at Dwicky. "Without you, I would still be screaming about aliens and the like, but now I get to go back to my house and back to my old room. Which, I'm sure has collected so much dust." He looked back down and gave a groan. "I have to take down so much stuff in there. It's going to take a whole day."

Dwicky gave a small laugh. "It'll be good for you. Keep you busy. Wiping away the old to make way for the new. Cleansing. You'll feel better once it's done. You'll feel accomplished. Your first activity as a free man." He leaned down to give a suggestive little bite to the top of Dib's ear. "Maybe I can come help you. Or.. at least help you break in your bed." He sucked the tip of the boy's ear after speaking.

Dib let out a low moan at the attention to his ear and couldn't help but lean his head into the touch while moving closer against Dwicky. The words had a grin coming back to his face and he let out another small noise before he spoke, "I like that idea." The grin grew and he leaned over to bite at Dwicky's shoulder for a quick second before he went on, "You'll help me no matter how long it takes?"

Dwicky grinned around the ear, dragging his teeth along it before he pulled his mouth away. He softly blew cool air against the damp skin before he spoke against it, his tone low and suggestive. "However long it takes." Dwicky's hand trickled down along Dib's side, smoothing down the boy's front and lower still.


	26. Sessions 26

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta** Morgan B.

Chapter 26

A car parked in the driveway of a very familiar house that hadn't really changed much over the years. As soon as the engine cut off the passenger side door opened, inch by inch, with obvious hesitation. It was as if they were back in the park all over again as Dib got out and stood on the cement that led up to the garage. In one hand he held his bag which still had all his pills and a few clothes; the others he kept at Dwicky's place. In the other he clutched Skeets tightly as he looked over what used to be his home. It was so strange to see it again, but rather than feeling happy about it, he couldn't help but feel scared.

A comforting hand placed itself on Dib, though perhaps it was trying too hard to be plutonic a touch. All the same, Dwicky smiled his usual wide smile of good cheer down at the boy. "Come on, your dad is expecting you. You don't want to keep him waiting anymore than you have." Dwicky cleared his throat into his other fist, giving a rather knowing look to what exactly kept them preoccupied from coming sooner in the first place. "Time to get reacquainted with 'home'. And as much as I'm sure you'd like, that room won't clean itself, kiddo." The man seemed to have enough enthusiasm for the both of them, and he gently pushed Dib forward, urging him to continue walking to the door.

"I'm sure he could have waited a little longer." Dib frowned before he let out a long nervous sigh as he was pushed along and kept his eyes on the door that was coming closer and closer into view. With each step he tried to get himself better under control and soon the bundle of nerves he had been was left back at the car as he stood in front of the door. The hand that held Skeets clenched and fidgeted for a little bit as he wondered whether or not ringing the doorbell was a better idea than just going in. Even if it was his own house it was still a house he hadn't been in, in a very long time. After a small internal debate he decided the best choice was to let Dwicky do it for him. So, he moved around so the man was standing in front of the door instead while he stood behind the taller body and poked his head out. "You do it."

Dwicky glanced back with a smirk and shook his head, amused, as he turned back to face the door. He would have been as nervous as Dib being back at this house again with all its spooky inhabitants, but with everything that had gone right so far today (minus the hangover) his good spirits couldn't be dashed for everything. "Okay. I'll be the brave one." He raised a hand to ring the door bell.

As soon as the bell was heard echoed inside the home, so was a large amount of shuffling. No verbal answer came to signify anyone was really trying to get to the door. The only warning Dwicky had was when the heavy wood was yanked open in a rough manner and, just like before, those same pigtails were the first things to be seen. It took Gaz a few moments to actually make the face of who was standing in front of her click, and when it did a sudden scowl, deeper than usual, formed on her face. "Dad isn't home." That was the only greeting Dwicky was to have until her eyes fell down just as she was about to close the door. Her eyes snapped open and her grip on the door became a bit too much for the wood to handle. "You..."

Dib had come out of hiding as soon as the door was soon to be open and just seeing Gaz had caused his heart to almost burst from his chest. He had been thankful that his sister didn't even seem to notice him, but all good things must come to an end and the way she spoke without even saying his name caused him to tense up. He tried not to seem as frightened as he really was. "H-Hi, Gaz..."

Dwicky was held in surprise. "Not home?" He shook his head, seemingly above the family tension that was going on around him as he tried to wrap his mind around that one piece of information he was given. "Not home? But, his son is coming home today. Where is he?" He placed a firm hand on the door, keeping it from slamming in his face; though he knew anything he would put near the girl he might not get back. But if he learned anything from dealing with Dib's family, it was to be firm, blunt and not back down, even though they were completely scary-crazy people. "Did he leave a note?" Dwicky furrowed his brows; his respect for the man of the house was dwindling to none, and it was thinning his patience. And it showed as he pushed more on the door, opening it further so at least Dib could walk into his own house.

Dib watched the confrontation with worried eyes, knowing that nothing good would come out of it, if it kept on. The little bit of space Dwicky had made for him he easily accepted and walked past the man to try to get inside of the house. It didn't take much for him to squeeze through and drop his bag on the floor while he turned back around to look at them both. He wanted to speak up, but at the same time, didn't know if it would be the best idea.

Gaz had watched Dib walk into the house with a sour expression, but snapped her eyes up to Dwicky at the sudden information that came from the man's mouth. "Coming home?" Her eyes went back to Dib and she stared for a long time before her expression became neutral as if nothing ever happened. "He went to the lab. He said he got a call he couldn't ignore. There was no note or he would have told me and I would have known you were coming." She slowly turned her eyes back on Dwicky. "Obviously I didn't."

Dwicky followed Dib in, much to Gaz's chagrin. ".. Must have been urgent." he muttered, obviously disbelieving, obviously not impressed. "Well, I'm here to give Dib a hand in cleaning his room up." He began to roll his sleeves up his arms. "You're welcome to help your big brother, if you like." He couldn't help lacing a cheerful smile on his face, knowing it would grate the grouchy girl the wrong way.

A sharp offended hiss greeted Dib as he passed the couch. Gaz's 'friend' lurked along the couch cushions, burning narrowed eyes into Dib's head; there never was a more murderous gaze.

Gaz closed the door while trying her best to glare holes into Dwicky's head. That neutral expression hadn't lasted long. "That's okay. I'll pass." She walked past the both of them and back to the couch to join the one other person on it. Not even her only brother coming home could keep her away from the television and the person beside her. Not that the situation mattered much to her anyway.

The hiss from the couch had made Dib jump and those eyes almost had him letting out a whine. He held it in though and stepped aside when Gaz walked past, not wanting to get in her way at all. He picked his bag back up and slung it over his shoulder, giving one last glance to the two girls on the couch before he looked back at Dwicky. "Come on, my room is upstairs." With those simple words he walked further down the hall towards the stairs, walking up them and to the furthest door on the left. He opened the door and let them both in, closing it after and setting his bag wherever it landed. "Home sweet home." The sarcasm was evident.

Dwicky looked the room over thoroughly; paranormal motif every which way, but what stood out the most was the alien memorabilia. Had he thought any better of it, it was a step back in time, a trip down nostalgia lane; in fact, it looked a lot like his had back when he was around Dib's age. Though it seemed in Dib's absence they used the room for storage. He ran a finger along the computer table, leaving a clean smudge along the settled dust. He leaned over and blew, causing the dust to blow up into a stuffy cloud and Dwicky coughed and waved a hand to clear the air. "Well taken care of, I can see." Dwicky huffed and put his hands on his hips looking over the mess they had to overhaul. "We're going to need a lot of, well, everything. Garbage bags, dusters, cleaner, garbage bags, vacuum, garbage bags, a hose, boxes. Hm." He tapped his lips, giving a wry smirk. "And perhaps some garbage bags."

Dib raised a brow at that and as he moved away from the door he spoke up. "Gee, I would have never guessed." He stopped at the bed and set Skeets on top of it, letting the plush rest there for the moment. "That means I have to go back downstairs and figure out where Dad stores all that stuff." The thought of going downstairs again where Gaz and Tak were didn't really appeal to him at all. "Maybe it's all still in the kitchen in the same place it was three years ago. Quick and painless." The last words were mumbled to himself as he turned back around.

"I guess I'll.. move these unneeded boxes into the hall for now." Dwicky poked the pile of boxes with a finger. "Or anything else you want me to do in the meantime." He had to stop looking at Dib's bed and he gave himself a sharp slap on the cheek, giving a wide innocent smile after as if he'd done or thought nothing wrong.

Dib couldn't help the grin that came to his face at Dwicky's actions. It was amusing to say the least. Ignoring the mess around him that he was supposed to be cleaning up, Dib walked over to Dwicky and moved his hands up the man's shirt to fiddle with the tie he always insisted on wearing. "Well, I guess there is one other thing you could do for me." Little by little the tie came loose under Dib's fingers and he raised his gaze up to look Dwicky in the eyes.

Slowly Dwicky's smile softened and he raised a hand to brush a few fingers against Dib's cheek, minding the small bandages still there for the scratches. "And what's that?" he asked quietly.

Dib leaned his head a bit into the touch while his fingers slid off the loose tie and let drap around his own neck instead. "You could help me break in my bed." His hands moved to slowly unbutton Dwicky's shirt from top to bottom, stopping at the middle as he spoke up again. "That is, if you still want to." He gave another small grin as he leaned up on tip toes and moved a hand to pull Dwicky's head down so he could place a slow kiss on the man's lips.

Dwicky didn't put up much of a fight, not against the kiss anyway. He pressed against Dib's lips, resting his hands down at the boy's small hips. He pulled away gently, though for such a small kiss his heart was beating excitedly. "Dib," he gave a small sort of laugh, after he kept his voice at a whisper, "your sister and her friend are downstairs. And as much as I'd like to take you in your room, on your bed, surrounded by plastic aliens.. You aren't exactly very.." Dwicky cleared his throat and toyed with the tie now at Dib's neck; which he found so cute. "Well.. _quiet_." Dwicky had to grin a little after at that. "Besides, wouldn't you rather christen your room after it's clean?"

Dib pouted a little at Dwicky's answer while at the same time he blushed, not realizing how loud he could really be. His eyes moved around the room and took in all the little knick knacks and every bit of dust that had settled over the years. "I guess, maybe, it wouldn't hurt to do a little bit of cleaning up first." He turned his eyes back to Dwicky and gave a small grin. Slowly he back stepped away from the other and moved his hands up to the tie, brushing his fingers over it as he spoke. "I get to keep this." The expression on his face turned playful. "Payback for my shirt."

Dwicky grinned at that, he really had to. "And what about your pants?" He began to re-button up his shirt so it wasn't obscene. "Or.. was that a freebie .. with benefits?" His look went rather sly as he raised both his brows, still looking at Dib as he smoothed down his shirt once done up.

"Just a small freebie." Dib moved his fingers up and pinched them together as he said 'small' and then dropped them back down. "I will be getting my payback for those as well pretty soon." He gave a smirk. "Don't worry." He looked around the room again and pointed to the boxes that had been piled up. "You can move those out into the hall while I go downstairs to get everything we need like we planned. No sense in them being in the way." He moved back towards the door, walking past Dwicky as he did, and pointed forwards. "To the lions den." His free hand moved up to pocket the tie and with the other he opened the door to make his way out.

Dwicky gave a small laugh; those girls, so spooky. "Glory to the brave." He gave a salute to the conquering hero.

Dib went down the steps as quietly as he could not at all wanting to even grab the girls' attention. He poked his head around the wall and all seemed to be safe since they were both so absorbed in sudden game playing. With a heavy sigh, Dib ignored them as much as they were ignoring him at the moment and quietly went into the kitchen, remembering that everything Dwicky said they would need had usually been stuffed in a small closet. So, he went over to it and was relieved to find most of it in there. He began to rummage around, letting out a small curse that he had picked up from Dwicky when a broom fell.

That was enough, just the smallest disturbance was caught by curled antenna. And the last two steps of boot heels that settled the Irken behind Dib were audibly made.

"You shouldn't be here." Tak spoke in a cold hard tone, as if that would be enough to erase Dib from her sight.

Dib quickly turned around to face the voice, looking at the body it belonged to. It wasn't just Tak he had to face. Gaz was also there with her, but perched up on a kitchen counter with narrowed eyes much like she had at the door to greet him. He stared at the hateful girl in front of him, who beat him in height, with fearful eyes before he looked away. His expression tried to change to something blank that Tak couldn't toy with. "It's my home."

"Said the fly to the spider." Tak's retort was sharp enough to slit a few throats, or anything else that dare near. And she took a step forward, but it wasn't a human girl who neared, nor human eyes; merciless voids of purple that kept narrowed and mean. Her lip curled back, leaving a jagged toothed smirk knowing her appearance.

Gaz gave a cruel smirk at the scene playing out before her. It was much too easy and she knew exactly what was to come next. "Scream, Dib. Yell it. Yell what you know is true." She leaned forward, placing her hands on the edge of the counter. Her next words came out just barely above a whisper. "Do it."

Dib's eyes widened at the sudden change, and at his sister's words, as he looked back up. Just as quickly he shut his eyes as tight as he could and bowed his head. "I'm not going to say anything about something that isn't real." His voice was shaking so badly that it was almost impossible to make out his words. "You're just messing with me."

But Tak wouldn't have the declination, she grabbed Dib's jaw forcing the boy's head up to look at her; even if his eyes wouldn't see, other senses would. "Those hits were real, Dib. Everything in the asylum was real. And everything here will only get _more_ real the longer you stay where you're not wanted." Her clawed fingers dug into skin to keep Dib from pulling away. "It's too bad that leg wasn't broken." She toed the bandaged leg rather unkindly with her pointed boot. "But we can remedy that, can't we, cuddle-piggy?" Tak eyed Gaz musingly.

Gaz let a slow grin come to her lips at the endearment as well as the thoughts running through her head. "Of course we can." She hopped off of the counter and down onto the floor with ease. With a few steps she made her way to the both of them and ran her hands through her big brother's hair. "It should be quite easy." Her grip tightened on the strands rather painfully.

Dib's heart thudded in his chest much too quickly. Each touch Tak had given to him had caused him to try and keep in pained noises. When Gaz touched his hair he finally opened his eyes and looked back and forth between the both of them, keeping in the last noise at the harsh grip. "Why won't you just leave me alone and let me be okay?" As he asked the question he tried to fight against the grips the girls had on him, but each one was strong.

"I think that would be wise." There was a click of lips behind the girls and the tap of sneaker on the kitchen floor. "Especially while there's an adult still in the house, and these actions are quite incriminating when witnessed.. first hand." There Dwicky stood, crossed arms, looking as if he were breaking up just a simple teenage disagreement.

Tak's eyes opened some, a little off set by how cool Dwicky was acting when he saw her as she was; most ran screaming with their eyes bugging out, and this was rather disappointing. She glanced at Gaz but her grip on Dib declined.

Gaz narrowed her eyes at the voice and her thoughts seemed to center around the same thing Tak's did. Dwicky was acting much too calm for having seen what he just did. Her surprise slowly melted away and instead a smirk came to her face once more as she released the grip she had on Dib. She turned around to face Dwicky, not giving Tak any sort of signal to change back and instead letting the girl stay as she was. "We weren't doing anything wrong. Dib just never really knew when to play rough." She looked back and forth between Tak and Dwicky, her eyes staying on the man after. "It would be best for you not to get involved."

Dib stayed as he was after he had been let go, but his eyes traveled over to Dwicky. As much as he was relieved that the man had come to help him, the words that Gaz said caused him to become a little worried. One of his hands moved out to touch his sister's back, anything to grab her attention again and make her stop whatever it was she had planned in that head of hers, but she only stepped forward so his hand couldn't touch her anymore.

Dwicky looked from Gaz to Dib with nothing resembling a flinch, which probably riled the girl up more. "Dib, I moved the boxes into the hall." He gestured for the boy to move; he didn't like Dib anywhere near the two girls. "Go continue work on your room. I've been meaning to talk to the girls anyway." His gaze settled on Gaz and Tak, a firm gaze, meant to hold authority; he was a counselor after all, defusing problems was suppose to be his niche. Unfortunately this seemed more like a bomb waiting to go off than a problem.

Dib's eyes moved back to Dwicky as soon as the man said his name, and he nodded his head. "A-Alright." He moved to pick up what few things he had dropped which he would need to clean up. As soon as he had them in his hands he moved past both of the girls and walked through the kitchen, giving a worried glance to Dwicky before he made his way out.

Tak tensed but her antenna slicked back and her demeanor suddenly went cool, as she stepped nearer to Gaz. "... I don't like you." she announced to Dwicky in a rather level tone.

Gaz had watched Dib the entire time, but didn't once try to stop him. She was actually interested in what Dwicky had to say, especially if the man could look at Tak and not completely freak out. Of course, he could have been just as stupid as anyone else she knew and just didn't care. That caused her interest to suddenly leave and her bad mood to come back. As soon as Dib was out of sight, she placed a hand on Tak's shoulder as she spoke up. "You're my brother's counselor, not ours. I don't really see why we have to talk to you."

"You're Dib's sister and that's exactly why." Dwicky's brows lowered as he glanced at Tak then back to Gaz; best to cut the purple wire and leave the green one alone. "Leave him alone. He's been through a lot with no support. You think it's better to push him away and not deal with any problems, fine. But don't make a difficult situation worse. Leave him alone, he'll leave you alone." Dwicky uncrossed his arms, though he still held the girls in his gaze. "I don't want to have to go to your father about all of this," he then pointed Tak's way and his voice fell to a tone the Irken instantly didn't like, "or _this_. Understood?" He crossed his arms again.

Tak's antenna flattened down against her head but she didn't say anything, though she wanted to bite the finger that pointed her way clean off the man's hand.

Gaz's eyes narrowed and a scowl came to her face at such threats. For a few moments she stayed silent and kept her heated gaze on Dwicky before a slow smirk came to her lips. "You really think my dad will believe you?" She shook her head slowly. "After everything that happened at the asylum and everything Dib did to us." She turned her eyes back on Dwicky. "I don't think Dad will be able to believe anything like that. He may just think we were provoked." The smirk fell away and became something more vicious. "And you better keep your mouth shut about _this_."

Dwicky was surprised just how venomous pre-teen girls could be. He had to take his time before speaking again, clearing his throat into a fist; otherwise his voice would have shook. "You don't want this to get any uglier than I do. Let's just stay on our separate sides. Co-existence is easy when one steers clear of the other." He raised hands, palms to the ceiling in gesture. "That's all I ask."

"Little man wants mercy." Tak spoke to Gaz though her eyes stayed pinned on Dwicky.

"Amusing." And it was easy to tell by Gaz's tone that she really did find the whole situation to be as such. "Why should we even grant Dib, or you for that matter, such a wish? Things were so quiet and so calm when he was stuck in that place. He belongs there and I have a right to have Dad all to myself when Dib caused nothing but trouble the entire time he lived here!" Her voice had risen through her speech and the anger she had was obvious through her shaking fists.

"Is that what this is about?" Dwicky's brows rose in his obvious surprise. "Favoritism?" He shook his head; Professor Membrane was a man of little time, and that little time seemed to be fought over on deadly terms. "Your father needs to learn how to schedule his time better with _both_ his children." Dwicky shook his head. "Dib is better than he was several years ago. He's calmed down, no rants, no aliens, no 'weirdness.' If you gave him a chance.. you could see what a good brother he can be now."

"I don't need a brother." Gaz tried to calm her shaking as she spoke the words. Instead of keeping her eyes on Dwicky she turned them away, trying to calm herself down. "He's an annoyance. A pest. Just plain crazy. No amount of treatment or _counseling_ is going to help him." She turned her eyes back to Dwicky and once more glared holes into the man as best she could. "We can live without him."

Tak ran her claws up and down Gaz's sides, trying to sooth the aggravation rather than the fierce sadistic anger the girl had that she rather admired.

"That's going to have to change. I stand firm by what I just said." Dwicky returned the glare, determined, not hateful. "I'll be talking to your father when he gets home, so I suggest you girls 'play nice.' Let's just agree to disagree, and keep things nice and peaceful." He then turned, finished with them, though their hard glares felt like knives in his back.

Tak slid her arms full around to hug Gaz's middle, pressing her front against the other's back. She whispered low against the girl's ear "... They both have to go."

Gaz only gave a slow nod in response. Although Tak's small embrace had calmed her somewhat, Gaz still felt the need to go and rip something, anything, apart at that very moment. It seemed Dib wasn't going to be their only problem to deal with and that made things a bit more difficult.

The one boy that had been the center of all the attention was at the moment tearing a stubborn poster off the wall. As soon as Dib had closed his door, he had taken Dwicky's tie out of his pocket and placed it back around his neck figuring it was the best thing he had next to Skeets. The plush would have been stubborn to carry around as he cleaned. As he tried to keep his mind off of what was going on downstairs, he gave one final yank to the poster and almost fell off of the bed, which he had been standing on.

Dwicky easily caught Dib against his chest, slipping arms around the boy as he captured him onto his lap and sat down on the bed in one motion, not giving Dib much say in the matter. Though he knew it wasn't the best of ideas to be throwing affections in the middle of what was a war zone. But Dwicky just felt like he stared Death, double Deaths, in the face, so he risked stealing a cuddle. "Mmmph Dib good."

Dib looked upside down at Dwicky since he couldn't turn his head very well and gave a small smile. He was much too relieved to see the other back in one piece and couldn't help leaning back against Dwicky. "I'm guessing everything went okay since you're back here without any injuries." He tossed the ripped up piece of paper aside that he was still holding and turned just a bit in Dwicky's arms so he could wrap his own around the man.

Dwicky let out a low groan and he flopped back on the bed taking Dib with him. "Barely." He rubbed his face, mostly his eyes and brows. "I think they stared a hole right through my face. I could reach right in and tickle my own brain." He stopped, thinking about that analogy. "Ewww." He gave another groan, flopping his arm across his eyes. "They're just.. not nice girls."

Dib made a face at the one small gross thing Dwicky said, but all the same, he crawled a bit further up on top of the man. One of his hands moved up and dragged Dwicky's arm off his own face. As soon as the other could see him, he shook his head. "I told you so." A frown came to his face. "You shouldn't worry about dealing with them. It's my problem." He moved to sit up, his legs straddling Dwicky's waist as he did. "I dealt with Gaz all of the time when we were younger. It's no big deal. I'm sure things will calm down soon." He linked their fingers together and let them rest on Dwicky's chest.

"Hopefully, now." Dwicky ran his free hand with lazy motion up and down Dib's thigh. He glanced at the closed door, knowing their position at the moment wouldn't be helping them. But he didn't want to get up just yet. He glanced around the room. "I see you've gotten a small start." Blinking Dwicky gave a small sniff before making a face. "Somethings gone bad in here. Did you leave any hidden sandwiches around three years ago? ... or is it dirty laundry and old alien garbage?" He gave a teasing grin.

Dib narrowed his eyes a bit down at Dwicky. "Oh yeah, that's very funny." He looked away and refused to speak for a few moments. The act didn't hold up though and he gave a sideways glance to Dwicky while he tried not to look as embarrassed as he seemed. "It might be a little of both. Here and there."

Dwicky covered his mouth but it did little to stifle his laugh. He even rolled to his side to cover up his laughter but that was doing little to stop it; Dib's reaction was funnier than the fact that he was right. "See, that's what all the garbage bags I mentioned before are for." He looked up at Dib, grinning. "Though I think our best bet is to hook up a tank of all surface disinfectant spray and just hose down the entire room. Who knows what creepy crawlies are lurking in what foreboding dark places in this room. Like three year old dirty underpants... -and burnt gerbils." That had Dwicky laughing again, and he tried to stifle it against the bed.

That last part had Dib blushing, but grinning at the same time as he playfully punched Dwicky in the shoulder. "Cheap shot." He pulled his hand back and shook his head for a moment before he grinned once more while looking down at the other. "Besides, the gerbils are gone. You don't have to worry about finding any burnt little rodents around here." He waved a hand. "They were useless and I got sick of having them in the house." He dropped his hand and blinked. "Or, actually, Gaz got sick of them being in the house, so I got rid of them."

Dwicky chuckled, finally turning and sitting up with a grunt. "From the looks of things you were a kleptomaniac with an obsessive compulsive disorder." He fiddled with his own tie around Dib's neck, trying to see if he could actually tie it without actually wearing it; it took a lot more brain work than he thought. "In English: a pack rat. I used to be like that. Hm. Correction, I still am." Dwicky gave a small chuckle. "You've seen my closet." He finished, but didn't think it looked right, so he undid it and tried again. "I just haven't had a chance to go through it all since I got back. Hmmm. Ah! There!" He tried to smooth the tie that insistently wouldn't lay flat but gave up when the tie seemed to be winning that battle.

Dib looked down and poked at the tie. "You look better in it than I do." He realized that could have been taken any real way after the words left his mouth, but didn't really care and only shrugged as he looked back up at Dwicky. "Well, when I go back to your place we could always clean out your closet. Although, that means other activities will have to wait." He let out a small sigh as if the situation was much too depressing to think about. "But, I guess if it must be done." He gave a small smirk.

Dwicky rolled his eyes. "Teenagers. You're such a pervert." He gently tugged Dib forward by the tie. "But.. you're _my_ pervert." He placed a lingering kiss on the boy's lips, moving just enough to lick the corner of Dib's lips. Dwicky leaned back with a lazy grin. "You'll live. You've lived this long before today without. Now, c'mon. Get up." He patted Dib's butt. "Let's get this room cleaned and start acting like the professional relationship that we should be having."

"Oh, it's professional now?" Dib moved off of Dwicky's lap and moved completely off of the bed as soon as he could. When his feet were touching the floor he turned around to face the other and grinned a bit, his hands moving behind his back. "Just a step above illegal. That's a start." He couldn't help teasing, really he couldn't.

"Shhhh." Dwicky put a finger to his lips as he stood, a grin turning the corner of his lips. "Ex-nay on the illegal-stay, babeh." He dusted his hands off and showed them to prove he wasn't red handed. "These hands will be good. I promise." He pointed at Dib, giving the boy a playful stern look. "Yours too." He wagged a no-no finger. "And no.. acting.. cute, or tempting, or, ya know, as seductive as a fourteen year old can." He snorted a laugh and turned to continue laughing into a hand; it was mean, but it was funny too.

Dib raised a brow at the laughter and slowly crossed his arms over his chest. His voice quiet as he spoke. "This fourteen year old was seductive enough to get lucky twice in one day." With that he turned around, but his voice was still heard as he made his way over to a shelf that held some random toys and figures. "Such a boring cleaning job. Maybe it would be more interesting if I had one of those frilly little maid outfits." Dib reached over and picked up the duster he had placed on his computer table and waved it around. "I'm sure it wouldn't be boring then." He didn't dare turn around to face Dwicky, he was afraid the man would see the laughter he was trying to hold in.

"Yea.. well..- that fourteen year old shouldn't tempt old men who are amorous. Or that fourteen year old won't be walking straight until he's fifteen." Dwicky couldn't help laughing again. "I don't know about that maid outfit. I might be more entertained than, well." He cleared his throat, snickering. "I mean, really, would _you_ find _me_ attractive in a short frilly skirt? Duster? High heels?" Dwicky pulled on some cleaning gloves so he could poke at the more questionable things, picking them up with a sour face as he put them in a garbage bag. "Or is drag more your thing?" Dwicky smirked Dib's way.

"Oh, I don't know. What if I want to feel pretty sometimes?" Dib tried to pout as he looked over at Dwicky, but he really couldn't keep a straight face for more than two seconds. Soon he was laughing and trying to muffle the noise in his arm as he turned back around. As he took every bit of junk off the shelf and began to dust the spot, he spoke up again, making sure he had himself under control beforehand. "This is going to take some getting used to. Either that, or I'm going to have to fill these walls with something else." He picked up the figures he had taken down and walked back over to Dwicky. For a few seconds he looked at the trash bag before he shrugged and dumped them in. "C'est la vie."

"Bravo." Dwicky gave a smile, despite the utter plaguing guilt, because he felt good that Dib was cleaning out the old making way for the new. "You could wallpaper your walls with posters of hot, nearly nude men." Dwicky had to cover his mouth at the rather immature laugh he made after that. His cheeks grew a bit warm. "Though, I think your dad would question a few things, if you did that." He lowered his hand back down, raising his thick brows as he tilted his head. "And I might get jealous. Sculpt bodies, rippling muscles seemingly carved from marble or some kind of glistening stone? Stiff competition." Dwicky raised his arm to show off what 'rippling muscles' he didn't have, and laughed.

Dib blushed and shook his head. "That's alright. I think I would rather keep my dad guessing as much as I can." He gave a small smile after Dwicky's actions and moved a hand up to pinch the man's arm. "Well, you seem pretty strong to me if you can take on two terrifying girls all at once." He clasped both of his hands to his chest and batted his eyes a bit. "My hero." He gave a small grin.

Dwicky laughed. "I never took you for the damsel type. Nor me for the hero type. But if it impresses you, I'd take any girl on. Even the most scariest of them all. Not that I've seen anything scarier than those two." He shook his head. "Maybe I should get a cape. Or a horse. Or a sword!" He brandished some obscure piece of junk and swung it around before dumping in the bag too. "But girls are scary. Or as we like to call them in my age group: 'women.'" Dwicky tsked in mock disappointment. "And to think, you could be dating some nice girl who likes vidyea games and smells like a flower shop. You two could even swap dresses, and feel pretty together."

"That's okay." Dib moved back to the walls and once more began tearing down more random posters of ships, aliens, and other such things. "I could always bug you to play some games with me. I like the fact you don't reek of flowers." He brought the ripped up pieces of paper over to the bag and dumped them in before looking back up at Dwicky with a small grin. "And, if worse came to worse, I could always make you wear a dress and feel pretty with me."

Dwicky raised a hand and waved it. "I'll pass. I don't do drag well." He pointed down "The heels kill my feet." He chuckled as he went back to heaping more inane junk into the bag. The dust he unsettled caused him to sneeze several times and he waved a hand. He grabbed up some cleaner spray and started attacking the dusty, grimy corners of the area he was cleaning. "So. What new things are you going to put up? Any plans for your new fabulous room?"

Dib stepped away from Dwicky's sudden need to spray whatever he saw, not wanting to get the cleaner caught in his mouth. "I'm not sure. I might just mess with the room as I go along. Ya know, buy stuff here and there and just place it where I want it." He looked over at his computer table and the computer that had been long forgotten. "This room isn't the only thing that needs to be cleaned out."

Dwicky paused from his fury of disinfecting terror to look over at the computer Dib was looking over. "Technology. I'm too poor to get well acquainted with that mistress. Always thought they were kinda neat though." He stared at the computer tower for a moment before his gaze slowly slid over to Dib and his expression became more sly as he stepped over beside the boy. "Soo, Dibuh. Got anything i interesting /i ," he lightly nudged Dib with his elbow, winking. "Wink wink. On that computer, thar? Nudge nudge."

Dib turned his head to look at Dwicky, and raised a brow. "Well, considering I was eleven the last time I used that computer then, no." He gave a small grin. "Sorry to disappoint you." He walked over to the computer table and sat down in the chair that was still dusty. With a small punch of a button he prayed that the computer would switch on and in less than a few seconds the monitor flicked to life, as did the towers that were sitting on the desk. "Ha! It works!"

"Awww. I am disappointed." Dwicky pouted as he walked over to stand beside Dib, looking at the screen. "And here I was hoping to see the more naughty side of your life." He blinked. "At the young impressionable age of eleven. Hm. That.. -that sounds wrong." He shook his head. "I'm a bad influence. Dib," he placed a hand on the boy's shoulder, "don't listen to me. I think bad, bad thoughts about young boys." He pointed with the other hand. "Ya'know, I didn't always used to be this way. I used to date people around my age rather maturely. Girls, a few boys when the parents weren't looking." Dwicky then looked back to the screen. "So, anything interesting on there?"

Dib had raised a brow at Dwicky's small little story, but quickly shook his head once the computer completely started up and got to the screen. "Same old, same old." He moved the mouse around on the screen, clicking through a few things. "I have a whole folder where I keep records from the skool's database. It lets me know who is attending what class, who is getting what grade, and even what we're having for lunch the next day." He clicked on the file and flinched. "But, it's really old and from the last few days when I was in Skool." He closed the folder and shrugged. "I'll update it later." He moved things around again until he got to another folder that had a triangular looking logo on it with strange looking antenna. "This is the thing I need to get rid of. Everything about Zim." When the folder was opened the amount of pictures, files, and other such things were well into the thousands.

Dwicky's jaw practically unhinged from his skull. It took him a long moment to recover and his jaw clacked shut, followed by a hard swallow. "Uhh-huuuhhhh.. Dib, hunny, um. Wow. I-- I didn't realize you were _that_ deep in. That's, um. That's, spooky stalkerish." He squeezed the boy's shoulder, glancing at him. "You might want to very much delete that folder." Dwicky tried to swallow his panic, but something about all that proof staring at back at him in so many many many files that made Dwicky's integrity feel disgustingly vile and his reasons uselessly paper thin. "... Please." Dwicky had to look away, he suddenly felt physically ill.

Dib frowned for a moment as he looked at Dwicky. "That bad, huh?" He looked back at the computer screen and stared at the folder for a few moments. So much information he had collected for absolutely nothing. For a few seconds his fingers tapped at the mouse before he finally gave into it all and deleted the whole folder, watching as each file was completely destroyed. After it was all over he stared at the screen as the frown came back to his face. "What a waste."

A hand rested atop Dib's head, smoothing over the dark hair. "Maybe. But as long as you learn something from all of this, maybe it isn't." Dwicky answered quietly. He rested his hand on Dib's shoulder again. He should have been relieved that all of it was gone, but deleting Zim from Dib's computer didn't erase the Irken from the boy's life, as much as Dwicky would have liked it to. It was just a bigger piece of the larger deception that Dwicky hoped to never face up to; as cowardly a thought as that was, he prayed Dib would never know, never ask, never confront him on any of it. "Besides, I'm sure there's far more useful things you could find to fill your hard drive with. Like.. um.. pirated software, illegal music downloads, and of course, let us not forget, the por--- never mind. C'mon, we need to clean up the area around the computer before the computer itself." Dwicky ruffled Dib's hair, trying to pull either of them out of the gloom.

Dib chewed at his lip as he stared at the screen a little longer. Finally he gave a slow nod and moved to get up from the chair, brushing the back of his pants free of dust. "You're right. It's still just a little difficult." His eyes moved to a little figure of a vampire that stood on top of one of his towers. With careful fingers he picked it up and studied it for a few moments before he turned towards one of the garbage bags. He moved the figure up and tried his best to throw it straight into the bag, but missed horribly and almost hit the window. The horrid throw caused him to pout and look over at Dwicky. "I was always horrible at basketball." He gave a small smile.

Dwicky tried to keep his laughter in. "Aw, I still love you despite your inability to hit the broad side of a barn. What about other sports? Soccer, baseball.. oh wait, that has throwing. Football." He paused and cleared his throat, trying to keep a straight face; Dib in football was such a hurtful image. "Volleyball, tennis, badminton.. um.. I think swimming is a sport. Hm. Figure skating?" Dwicky laughed, shaking his head as he found a box full of collected questionable samples of things that looked way past their expiry date. He pointed down at it. "I don't wanna know, do I?"

Dib had been glaring at Dwicky for the laughter, but when the box was mentioned his expression turned curious. He moved over to look inside and quickly stepped back immediately after. "No, no you don't. That's trash and maybe we should quarantine it as well. Set it on fire and all that." He moved a foot out to kick at the box. "Maybe we could set it on fire in Gaz's room." He glanced to Dwicky then looked back at the box, trying to seem innocent, as if he had never said such a thing.

Dwicky gave Dib a stern look at such a suggestion, but his grin didn't help at all. "Tempting. But shhh. No no no. We'll just give it its own bag." He grabbed a new garbage bag and shoved the box in it, thankful he was still wearing cleaning gloves. Quickly he knotted the top of the garbage bag and dragged it out of the room, shutting the door after. "Phew. Safe." Dwicky walked over to Dib's closet and tried to open it, but it wouldn't budge. "Um.. Dib? Why is your closet locked?" He looked at the boy questioningly.

Dib moved his hand up and wiggled his fingers. "Because it's not just a closet." He walked over to Dwicky and stopped near the doors. There was a small blackened panel near the doors that Dib looked over for a few seconds before frowning. "Well, seeing as it looks like I did grow a bit let's see if this works." He put his hand to the panel, but scrunched it up a bit. It took a few tries before the panel actually recognized his prints, but finally the doors came alive and moved aside and as they did Dib dropped his hand back down, acting as if it was nothing out of the ordinary. Once they were completely out of the way the inside of the closet could be seen. Most of what was inside was old technology that was busted, or some parts that hadn't even been used yet. A laptop sat on the top shelf that looked familiar. The rest of what was in the closet was actually clothes and a few small posters on the walls.

Dwicky's lower eye lid twitched. Looking back Dib's obsession with Zim seemed like some silly childish game, but looking on it now, it brought an obscure pang of jealousy in Dwicky that he didn't like. It was a silly thing to feel. Though Dwicky felt the guilt crawl though his stomach when he saw _that_ laptop. "Feels kinda like unlocking a time capsule. It's got that same ghostly exhale when you've opened something that's, like, a thousand years old." He reached over and pulled the sleeve to look at one of the many hundreds of small blue happy faced shirts. "... I think you'll need to buy some new clothes. Eerie." Looking deeper into it, Dib had been one creepy boy. Dwicky let go and dusted his hands off.

Dib shrugged his shoulders as he looked over the clothes he had worn the few years back. "I can fill it up with what I brought with me. After that I guess I do need to buy more stuff." He moved forward and started to rummage through the mess that was inside. Everything he brought out was just old pieces of metal from old inventions he had tried to make himself and he easily threw them aside on the floor. "All of this is such junk. I don't even know why I kept it. I guess I thought I could make something else with the better parts to capture Zim." He pulled a few more things off of shelves and stopped when he came across one old dusty device. He pulled it out and looked it over for a few moments, moving it around before he stepped out from the closet and held it out for Dwicky to see. "Remember this?" He smirked.

"I dooo. It's that thinga-ma-thinger that does stuff when we did that thing." Dwicky took the device and looked it over himself. "Alien identification transmitter, yea, that's it." He'd seen a few updated models on his travels but he recognized this one in particular right on the spot. He dusted it off, holding it after in both hands. "Ever thought of inventing stuff? Like, stuff that no one's invented yet. For the better of man kind or.. something." Dwicky looked back to the device, turning it over in his hands. "Digsum and Sloat." He laughed quietly. "I can't believe I remembered those names." How could he forget? It was all that ran through his mind those last few years, flying around with a race with a name that he thought they'd made up off the top of their heads. "I wore a burnt gerbil on my head.. it was kinda funny."

Dib gave a small sad smile as he kept his eyes on the device. "I think it tried to chew at your hair after a while." He leaned over to take the device back and looked it over once more, turning it around in his hands. "If I try to invent things then I'll just end up like my dad. I'll shut myself away from the world and the people I care about." He turned his eyes back to Dwicky for a small moment before he dropped them back down. "It seems unfair." He flicked a small switch on the device, but it refused to come to life.

"Maybe not. We're talking inventor, not scientist." Dwicky stepped over a few things, pushing the clothes aside with one hand as he backed Dib deeper into the closet; a blind spot from the door. "You won't turn out like your dad, because you aren't your dad." Either hand raised to brush fingers against Dib's cheeks. "You see what he's done wrong and do differently, learning from his mistakes. You can be whatever you want." His hands drew down to Dib's neck, brushing thumbs softly against the boy's jaw. "You have the rest of your life ahead of you, kiddo."

Dib looked up at Dwicky for a few seconds. The small touches slowly eased the bit of worry he had, but the smile he had tried to keep on his face fell away. He placed the device he held aside on a shelf, so he could wrap his arms around Dwicky's waist as he spoke. "I know that you're probably right, but what if I screw up somewhere? So far I haven't really been that great at life choices and it ended me up somewhere I don't want to go back to." He glanced away. "I don't want to mess up at something else."

"Sometimes you just have to live life day by day." Dwicky stole a kiss since he had the opportunity to. "Just make the best decisions you can for whatever the situation, and live on knowing at least you tried. But you're doing really good so far. Really really good. Look where you are: home, out of the mental hospital, in your room, cleaning up, starting new, going to skool again." He leaned down to speak more quietly against Dib's ear. ".. In the closet." He pressed a kiss to Dib's ear.

Dib let out a small noise at the kiss and held tightly to Dwicky's shirt. A slow smirk came to his lips and he looked at the other out the corner of his eyes when he spoke up once more. "That's funny. I thought I was more out of the closet than in." All the same he turned his head to press a kiss to Dwicky's lips, pushing his tongue past teeth.

Dwicky pushed Dib further in until the boy's back thudded against the wall, taking advantage of Dib's mouth soon after. He broke away just enough to speak. "No, you're in very deep," he pressed a brief kiss, "so very very deep." He pressed his lips back to Dib's, meeting the boy's tongue with his own.

Dib moved a hand up Dwicky's back until he reached the back of the man's head, burying his hand in his hair. He pulled Dwicky's head down further, pressing his lips harder against the man's mouth as he curled his tongue around the other's. His other hand moved down and up the man's shirt, running his fingers over skin, suddenly annoyed that he no longer had any nails.

Dwicky pulled away from Dib's lips, licking away the tiny string of saliva that trailed from their tongues, keeping the boy pinned. He trailed kisses across Dib's cheek, giving the rim of the boy's ear a lick. All of it was against his far better judgment, but a second of quality time couldn't hurt.

Dib squirmed a bit under the attention, but easily leaned into the small lick. He let out a little whine that he couldn't keep in and leaned down despite being pinned, to bite at Dwicky's neck. His hand that was buried in Dwicky's hair pulled the strands a bit roughly before falling away to grip the man's shirt once more.

"Shhh." Dwicky took either of Dib's wrists, pinning them to the wall above Dib's head. "You have to be quiet." he whispered with a sly grin. He pressed a few kisses down Dib's arm, licking the skin in a few places, when he got to the sleeve of shirt he went back to Dib's ear. "And I've never known you to be quiet." Dwicky chuckled low in his throat, giving Dib's ear a slow lick before he took the rim in his mouth to suck on.

Dib tried to press his lips together to keep himself quiet, but it wasn't really doing any good. The fact Dwicky had pinned his wrists caused him to narrow his eyes as he pouted and struggled just a bit. He didn't struggle very well, though, and it seemed as if he wanted to be pinned. "No fair." The words were shaky as he let out another low sound because of the attention to his ear.

Dwicky hummed around the ear in his mouth, lapping his tongue over it before he let go. "Mm. You're right. I shouldn't be doing this." It was obvious he was teasing, in the worst of ways. "Your room needs to be cleaned." He dipped his head to nose away the collar of Dib's shirt to suck upon some choice bit of skin he'd already bruised prior today. "I should.. just..," he softly bit at Dib's throat, "let you go.. get to work." Dwicky pulled away but he didn't let Dib's wrists free.

A small whimper came from Dib and his fingers twitched against the wall. His eyes moved to look behind Dwicky at the mess that still littered the room then back up at the man. "I think it's pretty clean." The expression on his face became a bit playful. "You could still let me go, though, so I could work on other things." He grinned.

Dwicky seemed to actually think that over but blinked when he realized he was and shook his head, giving a grin. "No. Nooo. Bad Dib. That's a bad thought. Not right now." Though all the same he leaned forward again; a captured squirmy Dib was a hard thing to resist, especially from kissing. "Especially when your dad is due home soon."

Dib moved forward as best he could and took Dwicky's bottom lips between his teeth, since the man was so close. He sucked on it for a few moments before he let go, letting his tongue trail down before he pulled back and squirmed once more. The struggling didn't last for long, though, and Dib let out another low noise before he spoke up again. "But, he's not home right now."

"But your sister and her friend are." Dwicky licked his own lips, brows furrowing just a slight at the taste and the small pining noise he let in his throat didn't help prove his reserve was very strong. "And they're mean. And would probably beat us both up. Just by staring at us." Dwicky let his eyes follow down Dib's body and suddenly wished he hadn't. Up his gaze flicked to the boy's face. He closed one eye and stuck out his tongue as he finally let go of Dib, stepping back slowly. "Good Dib. Stay. No tempting the Dwicky. Room cleaning good."

Once he was let go, Dib lowered his hands back down to his sides, but they didn't stay there for long. One hand moved out to catch the edge of Dwicky's pants as the man was backing away. He kept it there for a few moments as he tilted his head to the side, a small pout on his lips. "You're no fun." He ran his finger lightly over the other's skin as his pout became a smirk.

"Come on." Dwicky took Dib's hand in his, pulling the boy with him as he stepped out. "Out of the closet. Too much work to be done to play in there all day. You said yourself that this job would take all day, might as well not waste anymore daylight." He pressed a small kiss on Dib's knuckle.

Dib frowned as he was pulled out of the closet but gave in, although the small kiss to his hand still didn't really help his mood very much. "You started it." In all honesty, though, he couldn't really remember who started it. He took his hand back and shoved it in his pocket as he looked around the room once more. He would have much rather been stuck in the closet doing other things than cleaning up a three-year-old mess.

Dwicky offered Dib a smile before he looked back to the closet. "We can give your too-small-clothes to the needy. Unless you find a bunch of strange kids running around in your old clothes weird. Otherwise just sort through everything. Put the stuff you want to keep on your bed and everything else gets garbage bagged." He surveyed around the room much like Dib did and gave a heavy sigh. "... We just might need more garbage bags."

"You can get them this time." Dib shook his head as he said the words and knelt down near the pile of scrap that he had thrown out the closet. "I do not want to go back down there and have my leg threatened to be broken again." He pulled one of the bags near and started to throw most, if not everything, into the bag. "I'm very happy having it in one piece, and at least feeling better." He glanced up at Dwicky for a second. "Of course, I'm sure you want to go back down there just as much as I do."

Dwicky's look went nervous as he looked to the door, as if expecting either girl to be standing there with horns and pitch forks ready to devour them both. The man rubbed his arm and tried to give a casual shrug. "We don't need new bags just yet. But when we do, sure, I'll get them." He shook his head as he went back to feeding more junk into another garbage bag. "Eerie, how no one in your family acts alike. All three of you are so very different. Genetics are so crazy."

"Just imagine if all three of us acted the same." Dib stopped what he was doing a moment as he thought over his own words. After a few seconds he quickly shook his head and went back to what he was doing. "Never mind. I think that's probably just as creepy." He picked up one piece of scrap and looked it over, trying to figure out what exactly it was. "It's always been like this. One person can't really stand what the other two do or how the other two act, and so on." He finally threw the piece of metal away, giving up on it. "Some more than others, I guess."

"In a rather deranged sort of way.. it kind of makes your family honest." Dwicky waved either of his hands defensively. "That's not making an excuse for all the stupid things they've done... -but as neglectful and mean as they are, they let you know exactly what they're thinking and feeling, no masking it up and no sugar-coating it." He cringed. "Unfortunately their method needs work. Lots of work. Years of work. And that's only if they agree to the change." He flipped through some magazines he'd found in a pile. When he found graphic images of 'REAL' alien autopsies he quickly closed it up and shuddered, putting it back down. "... Well, I'm traumatized," he added in a cheery tone.

Dib turned his head and looked at what Dwicky had been searching through. He couldn't exactly get a good look, so he got up from the floor and walked over to the other. When he saw the magazines his eyes widened, immediately recognizing them. "Hey, I didn't know I still had those things!" He grabbed up the first one on the pile and started to flip through the pages while he plopped down on the bed. "I nearly bought everything that they tried to sell. Most of it I never got to try out." He flipped to a page that had a hole in it which proved his point. "Hmm, I forgot what I bought out of this page."

"I think I'm blind." Dwicky rubbed his face, mostly his eyes with the palms of his hands. "The imagery has burned itself onto my retinas and now all I can see are organs." He let out a dramatic moan of pain. "I'll never be the same." He peeked through his fingers, moving to glance at the page. "Considering there is no such thing as aliens, sounds like a waste of money."

Dib's sudden excitement took a turn at those last words and the magazine was lowered so it was resting on his lap. "I guess so." He had just been reminded once more of why everything he once loved was being dumped in the garbage, and he hated it. He flipped a few more of the pages, but didn't really pay much attention to what he was looking at. Finally he stopped at another small autopsy page and tried to push his thoughts aside in favor of teasing Dwicky. He held up the magazine and pointed at the picture, pushing the paper closer as he spoke. "You have to admit, though, for something fake they did a good job at making it look real enough."

Dwicky gave a small shriek as he clamped his hands over his eyes, turning away. "Ugh! Keep it away! Keep it away! I like my food inside of my body, and not all over your floor. Yuck. Spooky people with too much free time and extra ketchup." He groaned, "Think I'll just lay on the floor and never get up now. Wait 'til the mental scarring heals." Dwicky fell over onto his side on the floor, keeping his eyes covered, twitching every now and again.

Dib couldn't keep the laughter in even if he tried. He tossed the magazine aside and got off the bed to sit on the floor beside the man. A few small noises left him as he tried to get his laughter under control, but as he did he moved his hands out to try and remove Dwicky's hands from his eyes. "I take it you don't watch very many horror movies?" He gave a small grin. "Wuss."

Dwicky blinked his eyes once his hands were gone, looking up at Dib. His offended frown came out more a pout that Dib was pretty on the mark. "I'm not a wuss. I'm.. um... just.. empathetic." He frowned more. "And have better things to do than watch TV."

Dib raised a brow at that and let go of Dwicky's hands only to rest his own on either side of the man's head. "Really? Do those better things include kissing little boys?" After the question was asked he leaned down to press his lips against Dwicky's own. One of his knees moved up to slide between the man's legs and he couldn't help but grin against the kiss the entire time.

A muffled groan left Dwicky and he chuckled low in his throat. "Well, it's more like little boys keep kissing me." He lifted his head up just enough to continue the kiss for a brief moment. "I try to fend them off, but I'm only human. They usually end up winning." He reached up, resting his hands at Dib's hips, drawing his hands up along the boy's sides, dragging the shirt up along the way.

Dib gave a pleased noise and soon his lips were on Dwicky's chin and moving down. He left a small trail down the man's throat, giving small licks here and there, stopping only when the shirt got in his way. He raised his eyes and gave a small smirk before he spoke. "I always end up winning." With that he moved back up a bit and took Dwicky's ear in his mouth, licking at the gold stud.

Dwicky bit his lip, swallowing any noise that wanted to leave. "You do. For you, I am a doormat." By the belt loops on Dib's pants Dwicky tugged the boy on top, running both his hands up and down the other's sides and back after.

Dib easily straddled Dwicky's waist without letting go of the man's ear. He bit down gently on the small piercing for a few seconds before he licked at it as he pulled back. He sat up straight on top of Dwicky, his expression playful as he moved one hand away from the floor to run it up Dwicky's shirt. "I think the room is clean enough for now." Without giving the other a chance to respond, Dib leaned down and pressed their lips together, pushing his tongue past lips and teeth.

Something vicious watched the scene play out from a small crack in the door. Earlier laughter had caused an annoyed sister to come up the stairs to make her presence known, but instead she found something much more interesting. Luck was on her side that someone hadn't closed the door all the way in their haste to get back upstairs and suddenly her worries of two bothersome people were brought down in one situation. The entire thing had a pleased grin coming to her face and, without a sound, Gaz turned to walk back downstairs to share the good news.


	27. Sessions27

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Morgan B.

Chapter

It had grown late into the night and a can of spegetti-o's ended up being dinner. It was the quickest thing to grab and bring upstairs, avoiding the wrath of the two girls who had made the entire bottom floor their dominion. Dib's room didn't get much cleaner, not with all of the boy's 'distractions'; the bed didn't get broken in, but the floor most definitely did.

When Professor Membrane did return, he didn't meet a happy Mister Dwicky. The two went down to the Professor's lab to have a chat, a long one, that left all three of the adolescents perched near to see if they could catch a fragment of the important conversation down in the bowl's of the lab.

Both girl's kept looking at Dib with slivers of a smile at the corners of their lips; so unnerving when Dib expected much harder deathly gazes and even meaner words. But the two seemed to be biding their times, like patient snakes.

Eventually from down the stairs Mister Dwicky emerged, blinking rather surprised to see all three in one room staring at him expectedly. The man looked to Dib with a weak smile. "It's late, so I should get going. See me out, Dib?" He gestured for the boy to follow as he walked towards the door.

Dib didn't have to be asked twice. Although he did give one last look back at the two girls that still occupied the room he had been in. The small looks they wore caused him to turn his head around just as quickly. He figured he was thinking too much on it and gave a small shrug, pushing it to the back of his mind as he opened the front door to let them both out. He shut it behind himself, staying on the porch as he kept his hand on the knob. As much as he enjoyed the fact he was finally free of the asylum he was still frightened over what was lurking in his house. He dreaded the fact Dwicky had to leave. "I'll be able to come over whenever I need to, right?"

Dwicky nodded, stepping in front of Dib. "Of course. I left you my phone number and my cell number. At the press of a button I'll be there." His hand rose but hesitated, falling back down to his side. "Just mind your own, and keep to yourself. Your dad is home. You should be alright. Spend a little more time with him if you can. Otherwise just take your medication and go to bed." Dwicky's smile went a little sad, and his brows furrowed. He already missed Dib. "Okay?"

Dib nodded his head a bit while his hand gripped the door tighter. "I'll try my best, maybe I can grab him for a few minutes." He moved a hand up to scratch at his head. "I guess it all depends." He let his hand drop back down, but he was much to fidgety to let it stay still. "I don't want you to go." The words were whispered after a few moments.

Dwicky's smile widened for Dib. "Just a phone call away, remember." He shoved his hands into his pockets to keep them still. "Like in the hospital over the weekend, show me how brave you can be. I know you can do it. And you still have Skeets." He raised a hand to tug at the collar of his shirt in gesture. "And my tie." He chuckled quietly. "They wouldn't have let you keep that there. Things are better now. This is your first night out free, at home. You'll be okay, Dib." His smile softened. He wasn't looking forward to going home to an empty apartment, his bed was going to feel so empty.

Dib blinked at the reminder of that one weekend that had seemed much too long to him. He looked up at the other for a few moments before a small smile came to his face. "You're right. Everything will be okay." He glanced back at his house. "Or, I can at least hope everything will be okay." He shrugged his shoulders and looked back at Dwicky. Even after those words he tried his best to be optimistic. "You have nothing to worry about. I'll be just fine." He tilted his head to the side. "But either way, I'll still miss you."

"I'll miss you too, kiddo." Dwicky finally raised a hand to brush back a few strands of dark hair off the boy's face; any excuse to touch. "Take care of yourself. And Skeets." He gave a small chuckle. "Have a snack, and don't stay up too late. Get an early start on that room again tomorrow. You'll be starting skool again soon. So.. ya'know. Take care." Under the veil of dark he let his finger brush lingering against Dib's cheek as he drew his hand back. Shoving it back into his pocket he took a step back, though he didn't want to leave.

Dib had given a small quiet whine at the touch. He didn't want Dwicky to go just as much as the man wanted to leave. The small step back the other took didn't really help matters, but he knew Dwicky couldn't actually stay over. That would only raise questions. So, instead, he raised one hand to wave a few fingers as Dwicky stepped away. As he did he mouthed a small 'I love you' to the man as he bowed his head a bit.

Dwicky raised his hand as he walked along the cement walk way towards his car. He waved slightly, though as he took each step further away his smile began to fade. He looked to his car and fully frowned, his hand falling back to his side. He full stopped and turned. "Dib, wait." Dwicky raised a hand to stop Dib from going inside just yet, as he walked back.

"Huh?" Dib stopped himself from turning the doorknob as a curious expression came over his face. He couldn't help but feel a little happy that Dwicky was coming back towards him, but he was still confused as well.

"I can't leave without properly saying goodbye." Dwicky stood in front of Dib again, out of breath because of the rattle of nerves, the quick beat of his heart. "It feels, um..-shallow. And I'm never impulsive but.. it's dark." His eyes darted around before he leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss on Dib's lips. He straightened just as quickly. "Good night kiddo." He smiled more genuinely then.

The action startled Dib, not exactly expecting it, but enjoying it all the same. A smile came to his own lips as well and it was easy to tell he was much happier with the situation than he was a few moments ago. He moved his free hand up to flick at the few strands that always hung over Dwicky's forehead and when he pulled his hand back he finally spoke. "Good night."

Dwicky gave one last smile as he backed up. "Say good night to Skeets for me." He gave a small laugh "And my tie." He waved with more energy as he back pedaled before finally turning around to head for his car.

Dib laughed a bit and gave a small wave of his own, letting his hand drop back down as he watched Dwicky get into his car. After a few moments he turned around and let himself back inside the house, closing the door and locking it behind himself. For a few seconds he rested his back against the wood, not really feeling the need to go back upstairs right that second. Of course if he didn't want to deal with certain people he knew he would have to.

"Dib." Tak stepped from the kitchen holding a can that may or may not have been cola, that strange familar triangular bug symbol lay printed on its side. She spoke the boy's name as if it were taxing on her tongue. "Your dearest of sisters wishes to speak with you in the kitchen." She gracefully gestured to where she came from, giving a long sip to her drink after.

Dib immediately looked towards Tak and his eyes narrowed. He straightened up, moving away from the door, and instead of walking near the kitchen he stayed where he was. "Whatever it is I didn't do it. I've been in my room most of the day cleaning up." He glanced towards the kitchen, but his eyes quickly moved back to Tak as if the girl would try and move towards him. "I'm tired. I just want to go to bed."

The girl smiled, but the sincerity of it was eviscerated by the cold look in her dark eyes. "We've seen the error in our ways. And, want to discuss your staying here." Tak wiggled her three fingers in thought. "Make a deal. 'Keep the peace' as your little friend put it." She gestured for Dib to follow, and she wasn't the type to ask nicely twice.

Dib let out a heavy sigh, knowing that he really had no say so in the matter. Tak's words had interested him a bit, but he wasn't really trusting of the girl just yet. Either way, he followed her into the kitchen where sure enough Gaz was seated at the table, picking at a half eaten slice of pizza. Only when Dib stood next to the table did she finally turn her attention to her older brother and away from her food.

"I didn't think you were ever going to come back inside." There was a small smirk on Gaz's lips after she said the words, but she shrugged it off after a quick second. She placed one elbow on the table so she could rest her chin on her hand as she spoke up once more. "You know Dib, I was thinking. It might not be such a bad idea, having you stay here again. Just you, me, Dad." She glanced at the girl beside her. "Tak, here and there." Her eyes narrowed as she looked back to Dib. "I mean, we all want things to be i normal /i now, right?" A small grin came to her lips at the last spoken words.

Dib couldn't help but become nervous at such a look that came from his sister. His eyes darted back and forth between both girls and the nervous feeling he felt showed as he rung his hands in front of himself. "Y-Yeah, of course."

"And we all know what a smart boy you are." Tak continued on, twirling one of Gaz's cute little pig tails around on of her fingers. "You could be very useful. Not just around the house, cleaning, cooking, but at skool too, carrying books, doing our home work to free our time to do" she gently pulled her finger free of the purple hair in favour of slipping her arms around Gaz's neck; something no other could do without losing both their limbs "more worth while things." Her lips peeled back to grin rigid teeth as she placed a rather lingering kiss to the top of Gaz's head. "You would also go back to playing with that worthless sack of Irken flesh and his posse, keeping him busy from that stupid game of 'world domination' he pretends to play. Sounds like fun?" So much sadistic pleasure in one sweet feminine smile.

The display caused Dib to feel a bit shaky and his eyes to look elsewhere for a moment. He quickly got over the awkward situation though as he thought over Tak's words and narrowed his eyes once more, turning them back on both girls. "Why would I do all of that? You two are capable of doing your own part of the housework." He looked to Tak. "Especially if you're going to be staying here." He looked at them both once more. "And why would I even think of chasing after Zim again? I don't care what he does. Especially if it's not even real."

Gaz's eyes slipped closed to small slits as she narrowed them on her brother. One hand moved up so fingers could run up and down one of Tak's own hands as she spoke up in a deadly calm voice. "Oh you'll care, Dib. You'll care because you really have no choice in the matter. You'll do all of that and more just for us." Her eyes opened up just a bit and both of her hands dropped back down on the table so that her nails clicked loudly on the wood. "All because we know one simple little secret."

"That you weren't exactly secretive about." Tak went on. "Your relationship with your 'counselor' isn't very professional." She lifted a hand and tapped her lips mocking thought as she tilted her head. "In fact, I believe on this planet it's what you call 'illegal'. Not just the breach of employment, but trust and, oh, of course" her grin cut across her face with such satisfaction "the scandiless age gap." Her hand slipped back down and she cuddled closer to Gaz's back, feigning sadness that would fool no one. "Poor Mister Dwicky, would never see the light of day.. Just like you should have." she added virulently.

Dib's blood ran cold and suddenly he felt as if he couldn't breathe. He prayed to anything that he had heard wrong, but the looks on both girl's faces only made the feeling in his stomach worse. He lifted shaking hands up to pull at the corners of his shirt. Anything to keep them busy and not make his fear so obvious in front of the two. He felt so sick in that moment and even opening his mouth to speak back made him want to loose what small bit of dinner he had eaten earlier. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, but you do." Gaz leaned back into Tak's embrace. One of her hands moved up so she could wag one single finger back and forth. "You know, Dib, you should be much more careful leaving your door cracked like you did. Anyone could just walk by and see anything." Her hand fell back down and she gave a cruel grin. "You know, like you on top of Mister Dwicky, sucking at his ear. Or just plain kissing him for that matter." She shrugged her shoulders and moved her hand in a circle on the table. "I'm sure Dad wouldn't be too happy to hear about any of that."

Tak gave a shudder to what Dib had done, it made her true skin crawl. "Or the police." She went back to toying with one of Gaz's pigtails, gently pulling at the tip, letting the purple strands fall from her fingers. "I'm sure they could find evidence far easier of foul play than what we say. On you, on Dwicky, in your room, ... in _Mister_ Dwicky's _bed_." Her mean gaze softened to interest as she looked down at Gaz. "Why don't we go down to your dad's lab right now and 'talk' about this with him, snuggle piggies. Mister Dwicky is always saying we should talk our problems out. We shouldn't keep a problem like this inside, it'll eat away and leave such corrosive guilt in our bellies." Her dark gaze flicked up to Dib.

Gaz gave a small thoughtful noise, although it was more than obvious she didn't really have to think about it at all. She was more than happy to do such a thing. "I think you're right. We really should tell Dad about this. I mean, such a thing just isn't right and I'm only looking out for my big brother who's mind is so vulnerable." A small smirk threatened to pull at her lips as she pressed her hands to the table, raising herself off of the chair. A quick hand around her wrist caused her to stop and her eyes to narrow at the body it belonged to across the table.

Dib's whole arm was shaking and he was sure Gaz could feel it through his grip on her wrist, but he didn't really care. He refused to raise his head, still not wanting either of the girls to see the fear in his expression. They were already toying with him enough, he didn't need to make it worse. "Please, don't." His grip tightened as best he could make it. His other hand had left His shirt to grip the edge of the table. "Don't tell Dad. Just, don't tell anyone." He took in a shaky breath, but it did nothing to calm his voice. "I don't want anything to happen to him. Please."

Tak physically removed Dib's hand from Gaz's wrist, as if Dib were something as vulgar as a leech. She then took Gaz's hand into her own, and all was right again. "I'm sure we could be persuaded. Something to keep our own minds off the guilt of letting something so disgusting and illegal happen. Though it's really up to you, Dib. We can't _make_ you do anything." She shrugged her shoulders; such an out right light, curving her lips.

Dib took his hand back and rubbed at it as he finally raised his eyes. The words caused an even more worried look to cross over his face, but he listened either way, not willing to give up any chance there was to get out of the situation he was in. "What will it take to persuade you?" He looked back and forth to each of the girls, letting his hand fall back down to his side so it could grip his shirt once more. He wished more than anything he had brought Skeets down with him instead of leaving the plush upstairs.

Gaz's expression became much more calm once the extra limb was gone from her wrist, and she gladly linked her fingers with Tak's own. Dib's question caused her to give a small noise and she turned her eyes away as she answered. "Oh, just this and that. Anything we need done that I'm sure you'll be more than happy to do it. Just small little odd jobs here and there that we really don't feel the need to do." She turned her eyes back on her brother. "Maybe even play with Zim here and there. I'm sure he misses you." The thought was almost laughable and caused Gaz to grin once more. "Just like we told you."

"Oh, and no telling your little endearing boyfriend, or we'll do the same to father dearest." Tak gestured loosely with a flare of her fingers. "You will also be required to stay in your room when you aren't needed, sitting silently on your bed until needed. No speaking unless given permission, and always ending in Mistress Tak or Mistress Gaz; you must know your place. Snacks are off limits. You can have at" she twirled a finger, smirking "with all the vegetables. Otherwise you'll act as if everything is perfectly wonderful. All smiles and happy. Understood?"

Each little stipulation caused Dib to tense up more and more and his head to bow. It was the one first thing Tak said which had gotten to him the worst. If he couldn't tell Dwicky then how was he supposed to keep such a thing a secret from the man. It was going to be unbearable. "I have to see him." The words came out quiet and muffled since his head was so low. "If I stay away he'll know something's wrong. You won't know what goes on when I go over to his house."

Those words caused Gaz's expression to harden. She let go of Tak's fingers and leaned away from the embrace the other girl had around her, and moved forward with her hands on the table. It still wasn't as close as she wanted to Dib. She wished she could have been face to face with her brother so she could snarl the words in his face. "You better not say a single word, Dib. Not _one_ word. You may not be able to stay away from him, but we'll still know what goes on." One of her nails tapped at the table as she said each of word she spoke next. "We'll know everything." Better to mess with her brother's paranoia. He may have been out of the asylum, but it was still something she would be able to play with.

"And while you're out, we'll be here. And if you're gone for far too long." Tak shrugged easily. "We'll just make that passing observation to your dad. And he's a very smart man. I'm sure he'll put it all together quite easily." She linked her own fingers together in gesture. "He's quite influential too, isn't he? 'World renowned'? Just think what wonderfully hurtful things he could do if he knew what went on under his very roof."

"No, please." Dib quickly raised his head which he shook at every word that was spoken. He was hesitating as he looked back and forth between Gaz and Tak. He knew he couldn't disagree to what the girls wanted. They knew too much and trying to fight against what they knew would be useless. It was just too much. For a moment his eyes turned away from either girl and towards the hallway that led to the lab. It would be so easy for the two of them to go down there and for so much trouble to start. What they were asking of him wasn't so horrible. If he just played by their rules then everything would be alright. With a shaky sigh, Dib turned his eyes back around, but didn't keep his head up for long as he spoke up again. "I'll do it. Just, please don't say anything. Please keep your end of the deal."

The agreement caused Gaz to move back from the table as she tried to keep the smile from becoming too wide on her face. "Of course. As long as you follow every single rule exactly as we said, than there will be no problems." She glanced at Tak for a small second before she looked back to Dib. "Everything will be just fine, you'll see."

Tak moved from Gaz, stepping forward to face the boy, causing him to back step a few as she neared. Suddenly she was too close and back handed Dib much too hard for what a normal girl her age should have been able to do. But she wasn't a girl anymore, her pale skin was green, her dark eyes were now hateful pools of endless colour. "And don't think for a second that's our only form of punishment." Her curled antenna slicked back and a sharp grin spread across her face. "You'll take every hit we give and enjoy it." Her violet eyes narrowed to something far more mean. "..or there'll be far worse consequences than what you know."

There was cruel laughter in the background that more than obviously came from Gaz, but the entire time Dib kept his eyes on Tak as he held a hand to his stinging cheek. It would be a surprise if such a hit didn't bruise, but that was the least of his worries at the moment. His eyes narrowed, and as much as he knew it was a bad idea to question anything at the moment, he really couldn't help doing such a thing. It was all he could do in such a situation. So, he spoke up as he stared into Tak's eyes, not at all frightened by the color, but by the girl herself. "Why are you doing this? Why do you feel the need to do any of this?"

Dib's answer was an even harder hit to his other cheek, and kitty decided to use her claws, making sure to hit previous bruising, and the bandage that covered healing scratches.

Tak straightened, looking down at the boy "Because" she answered in such honest simplicity "it's fun."

Dib shut his eyes tightly as he tried to hold in the noise that he wanted so badly to let out because of the pain. His other hand had fallen back down because of the hit, but he didn't bother to move it back up to the newest scratches he would have, there was no use in trying to cover the marks up. He kept his head down for a few moments, but when he finally raised it his eyes stayed narrowed on Tak as he refused to say anything. It would only make things harder on him.

Gaz walked up behind Tak and rested one arm over the other girl's shoulder while resting her chin on the other. Her eyes stayed glued on Dib the entire time, and although her laughter had died down, there was still a smile on her lips. "You see, Dib. I told you everything would be fine." One of her fingers ran down Tak's shoulder. "Everything will turn out just fine for us, that is."

Tak let out a content noise at Gaz's actions. "Now.. why don't you go make a snack run for us. Grab us a new box of pizza too, while you're out. I'm sure you'll find an all hours store out there" she gestured towards the door with her claws "in the pitch black of the night, all alone, with just your insanity to keep you company." She glanced at Gaz with a grin. "Anything else you want, my little purple piggy?"

Something clawed, something deep at the back of Dib's mind, making thought fuzzy; voices trying to speak, muffled behind a thick barrier of repression. Medication couldn't keep away all hateful thoughts away. They knew the 'good luck' couldn't last forever.

"A Suck Monkey." Gaz narrowed her eyes and the smile fell from her lips. "And if you get me chocolate bubble-gum or anything even remotely close to that disgusting flavor, I'll rip out your eyes and shove them down your throat." Her expression turned neutral once more and she shrugged. "Other than that small request, I'm perfectly fine with what I have here." Her finger moved up to run along Tak's cheek.

Dib wasn't even staring at either of the girl's any longer. At the back of his mind he could feel what wanted to be free and the voices that spoke up were just noise for the moment. When Gaz stopped speaking he almost had to ask her to repeat herself, but knew it would be a horrible mistake. Instead, he shook his head, trying his best to ignore what ugly things were trying to come back. "Whatever you want. Fine."

The response earned Dib another back hand to the cheek with a closed fist. "Show some respect to your sister. Learn to grovel properly, you worthless pound of flesh." Tak wiggled her fingers after hitting, adjusting the joints before she lowered it back to her side. "Address us properly, or lose your tongue. No one would miss your grating spastic voice."

That time Dib actually did let out a noise. He couldn't hold it in as much as he tried and kept his eyes on the floor afterwards. There was no one to save him this time around and there would probably never be a chance of such a thing happening again, anyway. "Whatever you want, Mistress Tak." He raised his head and looked towards his sister. "Mistress Gaz." He suddenly felt sick all over again and could have collapsed right there on the floor.

Gaz gave a small nod and let her hand drop back down to run down Tak's front once more. "Very nice. I like the sound of that." She turned her head to press her lips against the side of Tak's head and was soon grinning against the green skin as she spoke. "I could get used to hearing that. Couldn't you?"

"Definitely." Tak purred her agreement, leaning near to Gaz's ministrations. Her arms slid around the other girl's middle, keeping her near, keeping her hers. "Go." she spoke to Dib, her tone turning icy when addressing him. "Now. Less you're a glutton for punishment."

Noise had continued to fill Dib's head, growing louder like diseased flies inside at the hit. Anxiety, stress, sickness, it only fed them. And assured the girls wouldn't let him take his medication before heading out into the dark of night.

"There's money on top of the tv. Take that and don't come back until you've gotten everything we want." Gaz bit at what skin was near her teeth before she turned her eyes back on Dib, her stare hateful once more. "This is just the start, Dib. You'll get used to it."

Dib barely nodded his head. He didn't know what he was listening to anymore. He did know that he had a chance to get away from the two girls, but not in any real way that he wanted to. Without angering the two in front of him any longer, Dib turned around and made his way out of the kitchen and back into the living room. Each bit of noise buzzing around in his head caused his steps to falter, but he still tried to ignore what was trying to push through. Blindly, he picked up the money Gaz had talked about and walked to the door, unlocking it before he let himself outside. The loud noise it caused when it closed caused him to flinch, but even after he still stared blankly ahead as he began to walk away from the house.

It was dark, almost unbearably dark had there not been pools of light from looming street lights lining the street roads. A cool wind reminded Dib that he should have grabbed a jacket for his tedious journey. At least the cool air felt good on stinging, swelling, bruising flesh, not so good everywhere else. Though the air did nothing to sooth the festering growing in the small trap door of suppression deep inside his mind. The night only encouraged their squabble, trying to break from their medicated shackles and escape the drug induced torpor they'd been dormant too.

The walk to the nearest 24/7 store was usually long and it wasn't in the safest neighborhood, but Dib knew to keep to himself as he walked. His steps were slow, though and got even slower as he kept on. He stopped for just a few moments in order to let some cars pass on the road, and that's when the thoughts in his head took over once again. He felt like breaking down right there on the sidewalk, but it wouldn't seem like a very sane thing to do. Instead he tried to keep himself busy by looking around at anything that would keep his head clear. It was the same as every other street corner, except for one thing which caught his eye. There was a small beaten up pay phone and for a few seconds Dib hesitated before he started to walk to it. His hands shook as he reached into his pocket to pull out a slip of paper along with some change. He was scared to death as he put the phone to his ear, but once he put the money in and started dialing the number he knew he couldn't hang up.

One ring dragged after another. Dwicky would be home by now, it was too late to be caught in traffic. Perhaps the man had gone to bed and couldn't hear the phone ring.

Another ring followed and just as Dib thought the line would cut since no one was answering, the line picked up. There was some commotion, someone tripping over something maybe it was hard to tell, the old phone didn't have the best connection.

But just as quickly, Dwicky's voice spoke up, eagerly "Hello?"

A large amount of disappointment had settled inside Dib as he had been about to hang the phone back up, but hearing the noise and sudden voice on the other end startled him. He quickly moved the phone back to his ear and tried to speak, but remembered exactly why he felt the need to call in the first place. He had no idea what he was supposed to say to Dwicky. Especially when he wasn't even allowed to speak a word of anything to the man to begin with. It would have been awkward to just stay silent, though, so he knew he had to think of something. "I-It's me. D-Dib, I mean." He tried so hard to stop his voice from shaking. That wouldn't help the situation at all and would only cause Dwicky to ask questions if he heard. "Did I bother you?"

"Hey kiddo. No, of course not. You caught me just coming out of the bathroom is all." Dwicky gave a small laugh on his end. "What are you doing up so late?"

Dib caught an off noise in the background, through the phone, a voice, but it wasn't Dwicky's; this one wasn't male. No, maybe he just heard wrong.

"Everything alright over there?" The concern in Dwicky's voice was easily heard.

The voice Dib thought he heard caused him to swallow hard and stare at the dirty phone booth for a few moments. It was Dwicky's voice which had him blinking his eyes and shaking him out of his sudden daze. Still, he didn't really know what to say to that question and he tried his best to come up with a good enough answer. "Y-Yeah, everything is fine. I just..." His free hand moved up to twirl the wire to the phone between his fingers. "I just wanted to hear your voice."

Dwicky made a quiet sound. "It's good to hear yours. How're you feeling? Everything good after I left?"

_'There's someone else there'_ ; the thought slipped itself into Dib's head from no where. _'You can hear it, can't you?'_

There it was again, a higher voice, muffled in the background, nuzzled between the state; _'He thinks you can't hear her. But you know better.'_

She was talking, but her words were nothing but a whisper, like a buzzing so far out of reach, so hard to hear over the crackle of the bad connection and the dry sound of white noise.

_'Listen closely, Dib.'_, the suggestion came to the boy like a hushed whisper, _'If you listen, you can hear rustle of clothes, ... the wet smack of lips on skin.'_

The words had Dib clenching a fist around the wire as he stared blankly at the numbers on the pay phone. He could hear, but he didn't want to. He wanted to ignore what was being said in his head. It hurt too much to think about. After staring at the number five for so long he realized he hadn't answered Dwicky, and tried his best to sound confident. "Everything was fine..."

_'Do you hear it? She's laughing at you. Laughing at you, you stupid boy! They're both laughing at you! Listen. Listen. Can't you hear her muffled giggles against the salty perspiration of his skin!'_

_'You're so stupid if you can't hear it!'_

_'Such a stupid idiot!'_

_'They're doing naughty things in your bed. YOUR bed.'_

_'How many girls and boys has seen HIS bed. Just another notch in his belt, stupid boy'_

"Dib?.. Dib, are you sure you're okay?" Dwicky's voice finally spoke in Dib's ear. "You don't sound 'fine'."

The wire was let go and Dib let his hand fall down to the bottom of the booth so fingers could grip tightly. He tried to block out every single thing he heard whispered in his head, but it was all becoming louder. He couldn't help but try to listen, pressing the phone even closer to his ear so much that it started to hurt. Dwicky's voice almost made him jump, but he kept the phone as it was as he tried to speak again. His voice didn't sound nearly as strong as it tried to be before. "I'm sure. I'm still just thinking about some things. That's all." It was a complete understatement and he really shouldn't have said it.

Dwicky didn't speak up right away, but that's when Dib heard it, so clear in both ears, i that /i sound. A sound that he made for only Dwicky when they were alone in Dwicky's apartment. A sound that he'd made several times in Dwicky's bedroom, just for him and only him.

_'You put your life on the line to protect him and he picks up any woman on the street, and they BOTH laugh at you.'_

_'Stupid, stupid, stupid Dib.'_

"Dib? Dib are you there? I said 'what things are you thinking about'? Come on Dib, talk to me." Dwicky's voice was growing anxious, worried.

A small noise left Dib and after it did he quickly raised a hand up to cover his mouth as if the action would stop anymore sounds from escaping. He could feel his eyes starting to sting, but he refused to blink them. The wetness that would follow would only aggravate every wound Tak had tried to open back up on his face. Slowly, he lowered his hand back down and tried his best to calm himself before he spoke up again. "It's nothing important." His knuckles turned white as he held the phone tighter.

A car drove by, though if it was loud enough to be heard on the phone it was hard to say.

"Talk to me, Dib. You called me for a reason, so please, don't keep it bundled. I told you before today that everything you have to say means something to me.. and I'm saying that as more than just your counselor." Dwicky paused and the line crackled some. ".. I love you, ya'know."

_'He'll ask if you've taken your medication. Blame this prank call on your crazies.'_

_'Crazy crazy Dib. You can't leave him alone for a second or he'll go crazy crazy crazy. Scratch scratch scratch.'_

_'He was only with you because you were easy. Easy, stupid, little Dib. He'll go on his knees just for three stupid words.'_

Dib closed his eyes tightly at the last biting remark and it finally allowed the tears to fall down his face. He was afraid to open his mouth again. He knew if he did it would give away the fact that he was crying. All of the acting he had done for every doctor in the asylum, he should have been able to act so well over a phone. This was so much different, though. He couldn't just shut himself off to something that hurt so much. "I'm just not used to being at home. At my regular home, I mean." He had pulled the phone away just a bit, hoping that wouldn't allow Dwicky to hear anything in his voice. "It's hard to get used to."

Dwicky's voice softened, maybe he did hear the hurt tone in Dib's voice. "I'm sorry, hun. I know it's tough. Just.. keep Skeets with you. Hug him nice and tight. He'll keep you company while I'm not there. Where are you anyway?"

_'You left the little itty bitty ladybug all alone, fed him to the two snakes. They're pulling off his wings, eating his guts, right now, right now.'_

A small choked noise left Dib that he tried to hide by moving the phone a bit away from his mouth. He didn't know if it did any good, but he knew he couldn't keep it in. Not with the images running through his head. He quickly moved his free hand up to wipe at his face. The action stung and irritated fresh wounds, but he didn't care. After he dropped his hand back on the booth, Dib moved the phone closer to his mouth once more to try his best to answer. "I-I'm outside." He stopped for a moment and glanced around before going on. "I grabbed Dad's cell phone and took it out with me on the porch so I could talk to you." It would be a better excuse for the connection being so bad.

_'Liar liar liar liar liar. You're such a bad liar.'_

"Can't sleep?" Dwicky's voice went even softer still, the concern was so easy to pick up on then. "Did you.." there was a little hesitation before he spoke up again "-did you want me to stop by? or, do you just want me to keep you company on the phone? You know, you should go inside, cell phones are portable. And no one can hear you in your room. It's probably getting cold out anyway." Dwicky was just trying to lighten things up, he didn't know how wrong he was. "If you can't sleep, there's your night time medication."

_'Pills to make you feel better. Pills to make you happy. Pills to shut you up.'_

Dib lowered his head a bit, and although his eyes were staring at the bottom of the pay phone it's not what his mind was on. "No, it's alright. I shouldn't stay on long anyway. Dad doesn't even know I took his phone." His hand shook as it continued to hold the phone, trying not to listen past Dwicky's voice. "Besides, I don't want to bother you." Saying those words hurt so bad.

"You're not bothering me." Dwicky's response was instantaneous. He gave a small laugh. "The most I could be doing right now is brushing my teeth. And you're far more important than dental hygiene."

Another car drove by, some rambunctious teenagers walked by, hooting and laughing, eyeing Dib with more interest than they should.

_'.. They'll do dirty, dirty things on your bed when you hang up the phone.'_

_'You're so stupid to call. What did you expect.'_

"Dib? You're so distant. You're making me worry." Dwicky's voice barely overlapped anything else, it sounded so far away, barely audible over the hushed whispers coating over Dib's mind.

Dib's eyes shot up to stare at the few teenagers and he tried his best to press closer to what little of the pay phone there was. A piece of the broken plastic that was part of the booth tried to bite into his back despite the shirt he wore and it caused him to give another small noise. He almost forgot about the voice on the other end of the phone and tried not to act as scared as he was when he answered. "S-Sorry. I didn't mean to." He didn't want to believe anything that was being said in his head, but he couldn't stop thinking about it. He wanted to question the accusations, but he was too scared to.

Something suddenly grasped at Dib's side, clawing at his shirt to get a good grip of it; thick dirty calloused fingers touched Dib's skin. "Got any change sonny?" gaping dirty teeth wheezed Dib's way.

The sudden touch caused Dib to turn sharply and stare at the bum that had touched him. His breath became heavy and he quickly moved the phone when he realized he had it pressed too close to his mouth. He couldn't throw away any more money or else Gaz and Tak would realize he had wasted it all on things other than snacks. Instead of answering, Dib shook his head in response, trying to keep his nerves steady and free himself of the other's grip.

"No? Wells then how bought you give me someth'n else then." The hobo's breath reeked of filthy liquor and food gone months bad in dumpsters. His other grubby hand reached for Dib's pants in a foul way. "Five minutes n' all fun, yea."

Dwicky was saying something on the phone but it was to far away, it couldn't be heard over the swarming gather of voices, thoughts, suggestions, echoing each other, growing in repetition until the worst sunk their hooks into Dib's brain meats; preservation in fear.

_'Get away! Get off! Get it off! His touch burns, his touch is full of disease, disease! Filthy disease and crazy!'_

_'Smash it, like a bug! Smash its face in! Kill it! Use what's in your hands! Smash its face in till it dies!'_

_'Don't let it touch you! Don't let it rip away your clothes, impale you while your screaming, screaming HIS name, while He's impaling another. Filling your shame with society's rot, then tossing you aside to let rats run over your sullied skin with their thick greasy tails.'_

_'Kill it before it kills you!'_

"Stop it." The small plea could have been said to either of the voices inside or outside Dib's head. He was just plain terrified and was trying his best to back away from the hand that was grabbing for him. The one still held tight, though, and it caused him to stay where he was. He completely forgot he was even on the phone, but the pull of the wire had his eyes snapping back to the booth and a choked sound escaping him.

_'Kill it, kill it, kill it, kill it - NOW!'_

Sticky fingers, unpleasantly dry and cracked skin, slipped under Dib's shirt; groping to feel where bad eyes couldn't see. But that hand got personal fast, even without sight.

That touch was a catalyst for seething anger, rapturing out to the very edges of Dib's mind; offended, violation, disgust.

_'SMASH ITS FACE IN!' /i they all screamed at Dib's frozen, taunt muscles, i 'SMASH IT AWAY! SMASH IT UNTIL IT DOESNT MOVE!'_

There was nothing else needed. No more screams and no more shouts. The phone that had once been pressed so tightly to Dib's ear was soon slammed across the bum's face with as much force as Dib could gather. He didn't stop, though. One, two, three times and only then was he satisfied when he saw red start to show from the other's head. The entire time his whole body shook, but he just wanted every disgusting feeling away from his body. He didn't even realize he had started crying again, even after he stood still.

The man screamed a painful noise but after there was barely a gurgle and the hobo fell slumped, strewn across the cracked and dirty pavement at Dib's feet. Dirty red trickled from where Dib had hit several times, matting in the man's greasy tangled hair, colouring his face with crimson streaks, barely pooling on the ground.

And all the sound in Dib's head was no more, leaving the boy with an empty hollow in both his head and chest. In that silence Dib could hear the frantic voice of someone on the other end of the bloody flesh speckled phone he held.

Dib stared wide eyed down at the body, not really able to believe what he had just done. It was like something out of a movie, not real life. There was noise, it was like static, and it caused Dib to turn his wide gaze back to the phone and his bloody hands. He almost panicked, but with shaking hands, he lifted the phone back up to his ear and tried his best not to sound completely broken down. "Sorry, I dropped the phone..."

"Dropped the phone??" Dwicky's voice was close to hysterics. "Dib, it sounds like you clobbered it to death. What's going on? Who else is there? You sound like somethings wrong. It isn't the girls is it? Let me talk to your dad."

Dib shook his head even though the action couldn't be seen by the other. He held the phone tighter not caring that the wet feeling made him feel sick. "Nothing's wrong. The people next door are being noisy." His eyes moved back down to the body at his feet and he stepped back, afraid it would move again at any moment. "They just startled me."

There was a slight sniffling on Dwicky's end, movement, the man was probably rubbing his face. When the man had taken a settling breath to level himself back down he spoke again. ".. You'd tell me if there was something bothering you, right Dib?" Dwicky's voice ebbed concern in that soft tone.

Dib opened his mouth. He had a chance to ask what it was he heard. To question about everything the voices had accused. He had a chance to tell Dwicky what had happened right after the man left the house. He even had a chance to tell Dwicky what he had just done and how scared he was at that very moment. "Yes." But he didn't.

There was silence between them, the line static with white noise. At Dib's feet there was a groan of pain, though not much else.

".. I'm going to come down there." Dwicky quietly spoke.

The groaning grew worse at Dib's feet, more painful, followed by gurgled coughs.

The sounds at his feet caused Dib to back away a bit more, but the wire prevented him and he had to stop after a few more steps. Dwicky's words made him shake his head once again. "No, it's alright. I'm alright." His voice shook and he couldn't stop it. "I'm just gonna go to bed. It's late. I'll take my pills and try and fall asleep."

Dwicky made a surprised sound "You haven't yet? It's really late, Dib. Go take them and head straight to bed, okay? Promise?" There was more hesitation, the man must have been fidgeting. "Are you _sure_ you're alright?"

Dib didn't speak up right away. Lie after lie. It all felt so horrible, but after what he had just heard. After what he had just been told. Did it really matter anymore? "I'm sure." The words were spoken quietly, almost too low to hear over the static on the line. "I'll talk to you later." Yet a horrible feeling moved in his stomach at the thought of seeing Dwicky again. Of how he would have to act.

"Call me tomorrow?" Dwicky quietly asked, it was all he could do; hope for a better tomorrow. He wouldn't be sleeping very well over tonight.

The question caused Dib to tense up and shut his eyes. Another phone call and he would have to hear everything he had heard tonight. If it really was all true then it would just hurt twice as bad. He stuttered and didn't even mean to, but he couldn't get any words out at first. "I'll try." It was the only two words that would finally come out and without even a goodbye, Dib hung up the pay phone without even wiping the blood off. He stared for a few moments before he quickly looked down at the body that was still near his feet. Being free of the phone, he started to walk backwards until he turned to make his way back down the sidewalk, wiping his hands on his pants the entire time.

_'Such a rude and stupid Dib.'_

_'You should have let the hobo do what he wanted to you'_

_'Liar liar. Liars deserve to be fed to the smelly hobos, crazies with crazies.'_

Once most of the blood was gone, Dib raised his hand to wipe at his eyes with the back of his wrists. He had thought the voices had grown quiet, but hearing them again had his steps slowing for a moment. As he let his hands fall back down he shook his head. There was no one around, so it gave him the chance to speak out loud to what only existed in his mind. "I'm not a liar. I'm trying to protect him."

_'Worry worry, all you do is make him worry. Liar liar.'_

_'The only way to protect Mister Dwicky from you is-'_

A darker suggestion finished. '_..down the road, not across the street.'_

_'Use his tie, that'll show him. That'll make him regret ever hurting you, carve the irony deep into his chest, breaking ribs, into his heart, as he watches you sway dangle-dangle from the ceiling of your own room.'_

Dib completely stopped walking at the last few things said. His eyes stayed glued to the sidewalk below, but he had little interest in it. "I..." He tried to talk, but he couldn't think of what to say. He didn't know how to defend himself or how to defend Dwicky. He didn't know much about anything anymore. Everything was becoming complicated all over again. "I was supposed to be happy."

_'You will never be happy. You will never be normal.'_ Something terribly viscous answered back.

_'I said so myself.'_ Dib heard himself speak inside his mind. _'When my sister came to visit me, after several years. 'I'm not allowed to be happy'. I killed Mister Dwicky after.'_

_'I crushed his skull in! Squished his grey matter right between my hands!'_

Dib heard himself laugh, long, high pitched, demented. _'I loved it!'_

"No..." The word was spoken quietly as Dib shut his eyes as tightly as he could against the sounds in his head. "That wasn't real. None of that was real. I didn't do that." His voice was getting choked up, but he couldn't help it. "I would never do that. I would never hurt him."

_'But I did! I felt the bone give and snap beneath my sweaty palms as my fingers dove into the hot, slick rubbery wrinkles of brain. Blood- so much blood and yellow sticky, dripping from his gaping mouth. His face didn't look like Dwicky after I smashed it with the phone- again and again and again!'_

_'My hands are still wet from doing it. Ruined the new pants I bought from wiping my hands off. Drying blood feels so funny on skin.'_

_'But he deserved it. Mister Dwicky deserved it! -with that woman! I saw it.'_

_'In and out, in and out, in and out. I can still hear it. That sound.'_

"It's not true." Even after Dib spoke, the words felt so empty. "He doesn't deserve it. None of it's true." He was starting to break down again. The way he was shaking was sure to cause a bit of commotion if anyone was to pass him on the street. "Please don't let it be true." It wouldn't do any good to beg or plead with what was in his head. He had heard it all himself. Every hurtful noise in the background. He just wished so badly that someone would tell him that he really had heard wrong.

With no eyes open something smacked into Dib, straight ahead, walked right into something that gave a grunt and roughly shoved the boy aside.. "Hey! Watch'it kid! Skinny little pansy." The pair of teenagers laughed.

The rough treatment caused Dib to stumble as his eyes snapped open. He tried to regain his balance before he turned his eyes towards the teenagers that were still nearby. For a few moments he stared at each one with a startled gaze. The remarks in his head and earlier situations by the phone caused him to take a step back and his expression to turn scared as he tugged at his shirt.

The one teenager stopped as Dib continued to stare at him. "Problem, four-eyes? Eh?" The teenage boy turned and began to approach Dib, so much taller and he knew it. "Want to make something of it? Eh?" But now the teenager's skin was melting away, falling in thick globs, pulling hair and eye colour with it. "Eh?" His voice was warping, warping to _His_ voice. Green skin, sharp antenna, and row upon row of rigid teeth were stepping nearer to Dib. "Run home to your, mommy! RUN!" That pitched voice screamed at Dib.

Dib forgot how to breathe and even with the loud shout he still couldn't move. He felt glued to that one spot and it caused him to let out a small noise that was panicked. It wasn't supposed to be real, but why was it staring him right in his face? Why could he see it so clearly? Without realizing it, Dib took one small step back, but his eyes stayed on the one figure in front of him. He was supposed to think of something to make it all go away, but everything was falling apart.

Claws, gleaming with the waxy skin dripping, with tiny bristles of hair. They reached for Dib, colliding with Dib's chest to shove him back violently. _'Run! Run! Run you disgusting human worm! Before I eat your insides through your eye sockets!'_ His friend beside him, his flesh began to melt away too, splashing stinking glops of it on the ground as he moaned in his own horror and pain.

Dib stumbled because of the hard push, but it got his legs working. The very visions in front of him caused his eyes to widen more if it was possible. He didn't want to see anymore. If it was real or not, he didn't care, he just wanted to get away from it. His feet kept moving backwards, but after a few seconds he fully turned around to do just as he had been told. He ran away. He ran from the horrifying images that just wouldn't leave him alone. He ran until his legs hurt and his chest ached.

But you can't run very far from yourself.

_'Such a cowardly Dib.'_

_'This pathetic waste of meat couldn't save the world, when he can't even save himself. Mister Dwicky is dead, dead, dead.'_

_'You'll kill him, but first you'll kill yourself.'_

_'Pathetic Dib-worm! The world is mine!'_

_'I don't deserve to be happy. ... Ever.'_

_'And Skeets cried and cried because no one could ever save him.'_

_'Stuffed toys can't save anyone.'_

"Shut up..." The words came out even as Dib continued to run. "Shut up, just shut up!" His one leg was starting to throb. It hadn't healed all the way and every bit of running was just making it worse. He couldn't keep on and his steps started to falter until he finally stopped, leaning against a small brick building for support. He couldn't breathe. Every bit of air in his lungs was suddenly gone and he felt as if it would take years to get it back. He rested his arms and his forehead against the building as he tried to calm himself down. He didn't care where he was, or who was around, he just wished he could get away from what wouldn't leave him alone.

_'They're going to beat you, your own flesh and blood is going to beat you. Severe your limbs from, socket, bone, tendon, flesh, and beat you with your own arms.'_

_'Aliens, aliens, aliens; in your head, in your bed, under your skin. Little parasites, chewing, chewing underneath, making skin blister and itch, bubble and swell.'_

_'Sucking the oxygen from your blood! You can't breathe, can't breathe, can't breathe, can't breathe!'_

Dib shook his head against the hard brick, the cement biting into his skin, but he didn't care. Maybe it would make the sounds in his head go away. "There's no such thing." His voice came out as barely a whisper. It was almost a gasp for breath itself. "They aren't real. None of it's real. Just go away. Please, stop." His arms started to move away from the brick wall and towards his head. Fingers touched bandages and new wounds, and that's when he stopped.

_'please, **please** .. don't ever do this again, Dib.'_

Wet eyes stared at the brick wall as Dib traced what nails he had left over the bandages. It would have been so easy to just rip them off and try to scratch away what was in his head. He wanted it all out. But, he had said he wouldn't do it. He told Dwicky he would try. He was out of the asylum for a reason. He was supposed to be okay. Even with such thoughts, though, his hands stayed just as they were.

i _'Dig deep, dig in deep and pull the insanity out. Pluck it out. Stick your fingers into your eyes, you can just barely reach.'_

_'Scratch it out. Scratch away the sickness, until all that's left is healthy skin.'_

_'Bleed out the disease! Only you can cure yourself. Only you can trust yourself. Burrow your fingers into your cheeks, drag away the ugliness.'_

_'Only **I**__ can get better,' _Dib heard himself say in such a hard cocky tone_ 'if **I** want to get better.'_

Dib pressed his fingers against the bandages as hard as he could, and still refused to pull them away. "I can't." He didn't speak very loudly, there was no reason to. "I said I wouldn't. I don't want to lie anymore." Even though such words left his mouth, his fingers still pressed down harder and it caused him to let out a small whimper. "I shouldn't have to hurt myself. I'm supposed to think of things that make me happy. Anything that will make all of this go away."

_'Aliens, big foot, vampires, swamp monsters, boogiemen, Tak, Gaz, your father.'_

_'your father wouldn't come visit his own son for even five minutes for the last three years, he kept looking at his watch today when you finally had him all to yourself, he wouldn't let you pick the movie, he wasn't even home to welcome his son back from the asylum.'_

_'Universe, stars, planets, people, animals, kissing in naughty places while your dearest little sister watches.'_

_'The only 'makes me happy' is a liar liar liar. Loving woman more than little boys so full of crazies who has to hurt himself to make himself feel sane. Ignore him, he just does it for the attention.'_

_'But- it itches so badly, the madness, so badly it hurts, deep inside the bone, so itchy.'_

As each word was said bandages were slowly being pulled down. "It's not true." But he had heard it, that one sound over the phone from that one extra voice. His eyes shut tightly as the bandages were roughly peeled away and fluttered down to the ground. "Just go away. Just leave me alone." The scratches were still fresh along with others newly made, and it easily allowed Dib to press into them. He didn't even care about the pain, he just wanted the harsh words gone.

_'Harder, harder, harder. Harder until all the hurt trickles away down your fingers.'_

_'Scratch until it feels good again. Dig your fingers in until you feel happy again.'_

_'Pull each and everyone of us out with your bloody fingers from your head.'_

_'Maybe then Mister Dwicky will mean it when he says 'I love you' after he's done thoroughly loving you from behind.'_ A once silent sick voice spoke darkly.

The last words spoken caused Dib to let out a choked noise and had him digging his fingers in deeper. The sound he let out became pained and he didn't even try to cover it up. He could already feel the wetness starting to form around his fingers, but it didn't stop him. He could still hear them. They were still talking and he didn't want to stop until they were out of his head.

_'Deeper. Harder. Shove them inside you skull. Plunge them into your soft temples, crack skull to tickle your fleshy wrinkle pile inside.'_

_'Liar. I'm such a liar'_ Dib heard himself pitifully whimper between tears that were inside his head and not out.

_'Crush your cranium between your palms, squeeze out the agony, the tears, the voices, voices, voices. Squeeze until you scream, then smash your head against a wall. Crack it open like a nut and let all the crazy run out!'_

It hurt and stung, trying to dig nails that weren't there into flesh that just didn't want to give way. What wounds were open were just barely bleeding and the crimson color ran down Dib's face, but he paid it no mind. They wouldn't go away. They wouldn't shut up. As hard as he dug they just kept talking. He wanted to claw them out, to grab every one of them and rip them out of his head.

_'I know you're strong, I know you're brave, and I know you're very scared right now.'_

"I am scared." Dib's voice cracked, but he couldn't stop it. "I'm so scared, but, that's all I am. That's all I feel." His hands stopped for a small moment. "I can't think of anything to make it all go away."

_'I love Dwicky and he loves me.'_ Dib's childish voice of not too long ago echoed in his head; and to the memory the voices hushed a little for a moment.

That one memory, as tiny and simple as it was, caused Dib's entire body to freeze. Not even his eyes blinked for so long and instead stayed glued to the cement below his feet. It was silent and that was all he wanted. "I love Dwicky." The phone call, everything he heard, but, Dwicky had sounded so worried. He seemed so concerned. "Dwicky..." Dwicky, what? His hands were shaking so badly beside his head, but still he didn't try to scratch any longer. Not just yet, anyway.

_'.. I love you, ya'know.'_

That's when they finally fell. Both of his arms dangled limp at his sides and Dib blinked his eyes to try his best to get rid of his blurry vision. "Dwicky loves me." His eyes widened after those three words and he looked down at his hands as if just realizing what he had been doing. Just as quickly, he moved his eyes up to stare at the wall in front of him. It was still silent. At least, he hoped.

_'I'm sorry, Dib. Please.. believe me when I say things will be alright. Believe things will be okay. That's enough, right.'_

_'I want to stay with you, all the time, but.. I can't always. There's going to be times like today that happen when I won't be there. I'm trying, but I'm only human.. You have to try too, Dib.'_

Dib heard himself answer Dwicky's _'I'll try my best not to let what happened today happen again. I promise. I really will try.'_

_'Liar. You broke a promise, you didn't even try.'_ Dib's own childish voice spoke to him, cracking so painfully choked it almost sobbed.

_'But why..Why did you hurt yourself, Dib?'_ Dwicky's voice was just an echo of words spoken. An empty memory, but the hurt and the betrayal that laced it, still sounded so animate.

"They wouldn't stop." Dib spoke so softly he could barely hear himself. His eyes closed and he moved his hands up to press against his shirt, twisting the material in his stained hands. "I just wanted them to stop. Everything they said, it all hurt so much. I couldn't make them go away. I couldn't try hard enough." He bit back a sob and it caused his voice to crack. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

_'Go home.'_ It was a solitary thought. _'Forget what they wanted you to get, and just go home.'_ It was hard to say where the thought came from, perhaps it didn't matter in the end. _'Go home, go to bed, and never wake up again.'_

Dib didn't speak back at the words, nor did he protest to them. Every bit of the suggestion sounded better than being outside, thinking about things he didn't want to think about. He didn't even care about how upset Gaz and Tak would be over the fact he would be coming back empty handed. He just wanted to be alone. To go to bed and stay there. His hands fell limp at his sides and he slowly turned away from the building, heading in the direction he knew would take him home.


	28. Sessions 28

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Morgan B.

Chapter 28

Trembling hands slowly opened the front door to a darkened home. All the lights were off which usually meant that every occupant inside was sound asleep. Dib prayed that was the case as he opened the door just enough to slip inside, knowing that any further and it would definitely squeak. On the walk back he hadn't cared one bit for consequences that would happen when he returned, but when he placed his foot on the porch, suddenly he didn't feel as sure of himself as before.

As quietly as he could, Dib closed the door behind and took a small glance around. There was no one in the living room. That was a good sign that Gaz was up in her room. If he was lucky Tak had gone home. He just wanted to bypass as much trouble as he could, bandage himself up, change, take his pills, and sleep. Hopefully then everything would slowly get better. With those thoughts he made his way towards the stairs.

Up at the top of the stairs Dib could see Gaz's door tightly shut, the lights were off but it was far from silent. It wasn't just Gaz's voice inside, but the other girl as well; murmurs, cussing, and sharp groans all barely muffled and far from trying to keep quiet. It didn't matter, their father kept himself locked up in the bowels of his lab and paid little attention to anything that stood directly beside him anyway.

Tak let out a loud throaty sound, a sound that was soon muffled against something else; Gaz spoke--it was hard to hear but the voice was aggravated and chastising-- but her tone soon quickly changed, melting into a low sound.

Dib stopped, just a few stairs from the top, and stared with wide eyes at Gaz's door. Those sounds caused him to feel sick and shake worse than he had been before. He couldn't have heard what he thought he did, but it all sounded so clear. He felt like if he took another step every noise would get louder. He couldn't help it, though. The bathroom was right across from Gaz's room. So, with a few more steps he made it up the stairs. He tried to ignore what he heard as he passed his sister's room, but it all pounded in his head along with the headache he had.

Something or someon thudded against the wall inside. Whatever it was, someone sounded rather pleased about it. The noise went rather incoherent after that, speaking, whispers or otherwise, it was hard to tell; it all seemed to peter away inside the room.

Dib tensed up at the loud noise and stopped for only a second at the bathroom. His hand was gripping the doorway tightly as he tried to calm himself down. He couldn't get upset or make a noise at all. That would only disturb the two girls. It was best to let them do whatever they were doing. He shouldn't have to care or even think about it. As he tried to keep those thoughts in his head, Dib entered the bathroom and turned on the light. Right away he started rummaging through the medicine cabinet. He would wash his hands off afterwards, he just wanted to find the bandages.

There was nothing but silence then from Gaz's room, as if no sounds had come been before, nor ever; maybe there never had. Maybe Gaz was asleep in her room. No other sound came from the house. Maybe everyone had gone to bed, leaving Dib alone in the dark unfamiliarity of his own house.

Static grew in the back of Dib's mind, but that could have been the worry or premonitory panic that told him to hurry everything and go to bed.

Hands shook as Dib finally grabbed the box of bandages and opened them up as quickly as he could. He closed the cabinet so he could see afterwards, and what stared back at him in the mirror caused him to flinch. His face looked worse than before and he had no idea how he was supposed to explain such a thing. He couldn't worry about it at the moment, though. Instead, he tried his best to clean up. His hands, his face, anything that was rusted in color and wasn't part of his clothing. It stung badly, but he dealt with it and placed the bandages on his face after, making sure to put the box back when he was done. When he was sure he had left no traces of what had happened he turned to leave the bathroom, turning the light out and heading back down the hall towards his own room.

The slam of green arm barred Dib's continuance, but it was the glaring Irken, wearing nothing but one of Gaz's oversized black shirts with a pissy piggy on its front, that truly pinned Dib where he was.

"Where is it?" Tak's voice sounded abused but that made it all the more confrontational.

Dib jumped and let out a startled noise at the sudden arm blocking his way and harsh tone. Wide eyes stared up at Tak and for a few moments Dib couldn't find a voice to speak with. This was what he was afraid of. He didn't want to run into either of the girls yet. Now that he had seen Tak he was sure he had just run into the worse of the two. "W-Where's what?" It was the only thing he could think to say. The only thing he could think to ask at all that would get him by.

The question had Tak's brows raising with her slender antenna. Ignorance was one thing she didn't tolerate, and she spared no mercy to fools. She lashed out, grabbing the scythe lock atop Dib's head, and marched towards Gaz's room, dragging the boy, caring not of the sob story or trauma he'd already gone through. She pushed the door open and flicked the lights on, yanking Dib in with her. "He didn't get it," she announced bitterly.

Something moved in the bed, or rather, someone. The lights had disturbed a rather content Gaz, but the words that Tak had spoken caused that feeling to be thrown right out the window. A head with mussed up hair, no longer in its usual pig tails, poked out from under the blankets and what could be seen below the neck was just skin and nothing more. Gaz seemed to have more than enough energy to narrow her eyes on her brother. Her glare was colder and crueler than ever. Much like Tak, she paid no mind to the state Dib was in and more attention to what she was supposed to be getting out of their deal. "And why not?"

The grip on his hair had Dib flinching and holding back a whimper, but the movement in the bed caused his attention be drawn to that and away from the pain. He felt sick all over again at what he saw. Something about seeing his little sister staring at him in such a position made him want to run out of the room as quickly as he could. The hold Tak had on him wouldn't allow such a thing, though, and all he could do was look away. He heard the question Gaz asked in that hoarse voice and he had to try so hard to keep his own voice from shaking so badly as he answered. "No stores were open."

Tak yanked the lock of hair up, forcing Dib to stand upright, almost to his tiptoes, since she had the power of height to do so. "_Now_ he remembers." She pulled harder on the hair she held. "Convenient." She pulled Dib's hair one way. "Idiot. The 24/7 is open twenty four - seven. Twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. Closed isn't in an option." She then pulled Dib's hair the other way much harder.

Gaz watched with lazy eyes, more amused than anything by how harshly Tak was treating her brother. "It was such a simple request." She moved a hand out from the blanket and moved her fingers down as she counted off each small thing she named. "Snacks, pizza, a slushie. That's all you had to get for us. It should have been simple even for someone as..." She waved her hand around in a circle as she thought over her words. "...unstable as you, Dib." She dropped her hand back down. "You aren't off to a very good start."

Dib bit down hard on his lip. He didn't want to make a sound, even with each tug and pull to his scalp. It would only give them both the satisfaction that they were actually hurting him and he didn't want that. Instead, he listened to Gaz's words and tried to keep himself calm. He had screwed up badly and that's not something they had wanted. "I'm sorry." He spoke the words past a pained noise.

"No. No you aren't. You obviously didn't try very hard. You walked out of the house, were gone for hours on end, returned empty handed." Tak made a low sound of disgust as she glanced down. "Only to drip blood in your beloved sister's carpet floor. Which," she narrowed her eyes, ripping Dib's head back so the blood saturating the poorly done up bandages would trickle down the boy's neck instead, "you'll be cleaning up with your tongue in the morning." Tak exhaled, aggravated her quality time with Gaz was ruined by the boy's stupidity. "You'll feel 'sorry' alright, so very very 'sorry' to disobey your first order." Claws clenched tighter into Dib's hair. "Not a good first impression." Tak looked over to Gaz. "Maybe we should go wake up your dad." The threat curved her lips just a little in amusement.

Gaz rested her chin on her hands and gave a weak smirk at such a suggestion. "We should. Although, I'm sure he won't be very happy being woken up at such a late hour and for the news that we have to tell him." She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders just a bit. "But, it can't be helped. I can feel the guilt just eating away at me. Bit by bit." The grin on her face was anything but guilty after those words.

Dib tried his best to shake his head, but Tak wouldn't allow him such movement. "Don't wake him up. Don't tell him. Please, just don't." He couldn't keep the noises in anymore and for that it just made him feel worse about the whole situation. "I'm sorry I messed up, but please, don't tell Dad." He felt pathetic for begging in such a way, but he didn't know what else he could do at that moment.

Tak pulled Dib's head back even further. "If you're going to beg, you should address us accordingly." She raised a clawed foot to Dib's tailbone and kicked the boy away, letting go of his hair so he could stumble and fall. "Start begging and pleading, and make it i good /i ." She dusted her claws of dark hair, grimacing in disgust at the human characteristic. "Ugh. Human hair is so gross."

Gaz raised a brow at Tak's words, but in the end only rolled her eyes. She was far more interested in hearing her brother beg for mercy. Such a thing caused her to turn her eyes back to Dib as the boy fell to his knees onto the floor. She completely ignored the noise he made. She didn't care if any of the treatment Tak gave him hurt. This was what he deserved. "Well, Dib?"

Dib clenched his hands against the carpet as he stared down at it. His sister's voice had him tensing up, but he wasn't ready to speak just yet. He knew that would only mean trouble, but it was so hard to lower himself just as he had been doing. If he didn't, though, then it would only mean worse things in the end. "Please..." He kept his head down even as he finally started speaking. "Please Mistress Gaz." He was already starting to feel sick. "Please Mistress Tak. I'm sorry. Please, please, don't tell Dad. It will never happen again. I'll do anything else you ask me to. Please don't tell him."

"Lower." Tak ordered. "Bow lower." She walked over and raised her foot, bringing it down none too kindly with its claws on Dib's shoulder, forcing the boy further down to the carpet. "And never, i never /i make eye contact. You are far too unworthy." The Irken looked to Gaz, every bit amused as the other girl. She was assured they'd be able to come up with a suitable punishment between them.

Dib bit back the noise he wanted to let out and doing so caused him to bite his lips once again. He knew he bit down too hard when he tasted something metallic, but he refused to let up. It took a while before he even spoke again to either of the girls, speaking to both at the same time. "I'm sorry, Mistress."

Gaz couldn't help the grin that came to her lips. It really was like music to hear her brother say such a thing while beaten up, and down on his knees. She would never let him live it down, ever. "I'm sure we should figure out some other way to make you regret your actions. I mean, we have to make you realize that you can never screw up like this again." She placed a finger to her chin as if seriously deep in thought. "What possible way could such a thing be drilled into your brain. There has to be some way." She turned her eyes back to Tak and her grin grew just a bit.

"Throw on a shirt and let's invade his room, and find something 'precious' of his to mutilate." Tak removed her foot from Dib's shoulders so she could grasp the lock of hair again to yank Dib back up. "Come and watch, jail bait." She turned to leave, dragging Dib along by his hair cruelly, whether he was standing or not.

Dib moved both of his hands up to try and grab at Tak's own. He knew he should have left well enough alone, but he didn't want them anywhere near his room. He just wanted the whole situation to be over and done with and for tomorrow to come, even though tomorrow wouldn't even be any better. "Leave my things alone!"

Gaz had quickly gotten out of bed and thrown on the first shirt she saw, following after and switching on the light to Dib's room. Being inside the messy area caused her to lean against the furthest wall near the door. She had never liked stepping one foot inside her brother's room and usually only did so when absolutely necessary. Her eyes immediately went to the spot where she had caught the much too illegal situation earlier and her eyes narrowed before she looked back up. "Disgusting."

To spare herself the vile touch of Dib's most definitely diseased ridden floor on her bare feet, Tak took to her pak's metal spider limbs, yanking the begrudging boy in by a fist full of more hair. "Let's seee." Tak looked over the surrounding area with a careful eye, she pointed around. "Junk, junk, junk, more junk, useless junk, old Irken junk. Ugh, I don't even want to know what that is. Ahh, there. Those look important, if not placed on the most sickening of places." She gestured to the bed with a claw. "The stuffed toy makes another appearance, and we have the illegally loving boyfriend's discarded clothing." She picked up the duffle bag Dib brought with him. "And this probably has some fun stuff in it." She tossed it Gaz's way.

Gaz caught the bag easily and started to unzip it. Little by little she rummaged through it, tossing out everything she found. A small pile of clothes started to build up on the floor, but suddenly stopped as Gaz pulled a bag out and held it up for Tak to see. "Well, look what we have here." Inside the clear plastic were a few bottles, obviously every bit of pills that Dib needed to take. Such a thing caused Gaz to drop the duffle, knowing that whatever else was in it was just junk to her.

Dib felt like his hair was about to be ripped out by its roots. It hurt so bad, but he just couldn't stop watching as both of the girls went through his things. When Tak came across the two things that he had wanted to keep away from both of them he tried his best to struggle, to find some way to make her let go, but it was useless. Gaz's voice had his eyes turning to his sister and the small bag of pills caused his stomach to turn. He needed those. He still had yet to take the ones for the night. The evidence of that were the still bloody wounds on his face. "No, please..."

"Jail bait's sane medicine." Tak tapped her teeth in mock innocent thought. "Why, those are very very very important. They should be kept in safe place, so they don't get lost, or.." She clapped a hand to her cheek feigning concern and worry. "-or worse-," her expression changed so quickly to something much more sadistic, "get flushed down the toilet."

Gaz moved her hand inside the plastic and pulled out one of the bottles. With quick fingers, she unscrewed the top and picked out a single pill, looking it over carefully. "So small. It would take no time for every single one of them to be flushed away. All in one go, maybe two times, tops." She dropped the pill back in and placed the top back on as she moved her eyes once more on Dib.

Dib tried to pull Tak's hand off of his hair once again. He wanted the girl off of him so he could grab his medication back. It was all getting to be too out of control. If anything happened to those pills then everything he heard would come back. The nightmares would slowly ease back in as he slept. He wouldn't be able to stand it. He didn't even want to think about it. "Let go! Put them back!"

One of the spindly legs rose to whack Dib across the face. Tak couldn't take his sniveling. She gave the other girl a sly smirk. "Well then, to the bathroom we go." On spider limbs she clattered to the door, taking Dib with her, and gestured gracefully with a clawed hand to the door. "If you'd do the honours."

Hearing Dib's pained sound as Tak hit him caused Gaz's next words to be purred. "With pleasure." She was getting so much enjoyment out of all of this; it really was turning out to be just as much fun as she had hoped. She moved away from the wall and turned to walk out of the room, heading down towards the bathroom. As she walked, she swung the bag of pills in one hand as if it were a toy. Once she reached the door she switched the light back on and ignored what little mess her brother had left behind. She didn't care about any of that and only walked right up to the toilet, while setting the bag on the counter. "I wonder, which should go first." She ran her fingers along each pill bottle, letting her nails tap each lid, one by one.

"Let's ask your dear little brother." Tak dragged the boy to stand in front of her, making sure he saw but was just out of reach to do anything. "Well, Dib? What one do you need most? Are you hearing things? Seeing things that shouldn't be there? Having bad dreams about..," she leaned forward to speak that one word near Dib's ear, "_aliens_?" Her free green hand ran it's claws across Dib's throat. "Isn't this proof enough that we're real? We'll flush each and every last pill until you see what's really there. And if you don't act like a good sane boy, your daddy is going to send you back to where you belong." Tak's gaze flicked to Gaz, her smirk growing to a wide, sadistic grin.

Dib didn't answer, he couldn't, because every answer to each of those questions was a yes. It would only let them play with him further and he would have rather kept his mouth shut than have that happen. The feeling at his throat caused him to swallow hard and try his best to pull away from it as he shut his eyes tightly.

A small scowl formed on Gaz's face at the lack of a response from Dib, but as she looked back at Tak, the sour expression faded away. The one small thought helped ease her and she simply shrugged her shoulders as she picked up one of the bottles at random. "Fine, if you won't tell us, than we'll just have to guess." She opened the top and placed it aside. "But, I find it to be much more fun this way." She couldn't help the laugh that tried to make it's way past her lips as she slowly poured the contents of the bottle into the toilet.

Claws left Dib's throat to peel his eye lids back up, forcing him to watch the many little pills plink into the water. Tak laughed obnoxiously, it was too funny to watch. "So, Dib, how's it feel to watch your sanity go down the flusher?" She laughed harder at the literalism of that; it was just too cruel a hilarity.

Dib could feel his eyes watering at the sudden treatment. He couldn't stand their laughter. It was grating, but he couldn't stop it. They had all the power over him. He was being forced to watch it all, to listen to it all, and there wasn't anything he could do. There was nothing he really planned to do. He just had to bare it. Yet, even as he watched Gaz open the next bottle and saw as each pill for the voices dropped into the water, he wished in that moment that he could do something.

"To think," Gaz spoke up as the second bottle was nearly empty, "this could have all been avoided if you had just stayed in the asylum like we asked." Her eyes narrowed and she shook her head. "But you just had to find a way out. I suppose threats just don't work well with you." The bottle emptied completely and she set it aside to pick up the next one. "That's why you shouldn't swap spit with the counselor on your bedroom floor." Her hand gripped the bottle twice as hard as it had the others. "Maybe this threat will make you listen more closely. Maybe next time you screw up, we'll actually tell."

Tak fished out the money from Dib's pocket, glancing it over she placed it on the counter; human monies didn't hold her interest all that much. She took up Dib's wrists, pulling the boy's arms restraintively behind his back, bending them at unnatural angles since the boy decided to be such a complacent prisoner. "Go ahead, jail bait, cry, whimper, plead. You're already hearing them aren't you? The voices. You scratched yourself up again, didn't you? We heard about the time you did it in the asylum, because the voices told you to." She let go of the boy's hair since she had his arms, and patted the boy condescendingly atop his head. Her voice hit such a mockingly soft tone, encouraging him with a rather feminine tone. "That's a good Dib. Fall apart. Go on, just fall apart. It's so easy now."

Dib shook his head as best he could. He didn't want to break down. He had just gotten rid of the voices, he didn't want to hear them again. Never again. It was too painful. Everything they said always hurt so much. "I don't want to. I don't want to hear them anymore. I just want to be normal. That's all I ever wanted."

Every last pill was gone and the bottles had all been thrown in the garbage. Maybe their dad would see them and immediately throw Dib back in to the asylum, thinking he had done the deed himself. Gaz could only hope. She pushed down on the handle and in one simple flush the pills were gone. She dusted off her hands and turned around to walk towards her brother. One finger moved under his chin and she snarled as she spoke close to his face. "You'll never be normal."

And Tak let go of Dib, the touch suddenly so very offensive. The boy couldn't stand up on his own and that made her smile. She looked at Gaz and her smile widened. "Well I feel less guilty now. I think I'll sleep easier tonight. How about you, my little piggy?" Her curled antenna cheerfully perked.

Gaz straightened up and instead of walking over Dib, she placed one foot on the boy's back, stepping on top of his body as she made her way to Tak's side. "Much easier. I feel so much better now." She lifted a hand up to wrap fingers around one of the antenna, toying with it a bit as she looked down at her brother. "It's so much better to be free of all that annoying guilt."

The extra weight on his body had caused Dib to grit his teeth in pain. He tried to catch his breath after Gaz was off of him, but it took a few moments. After his sister was finished speaking he turned narrowed eyes on both of the girls. He wished he could melt them with his eyes at that very moment, and cursed inwardly that such a thing wasn't possible.

Tak let out a pleased purr at Gaz's action, looking back down at Dib and his scowl towards them. It wasn't beneath her to give a swift kick to Dib's side, making sure her clawed toes hit good and hard to ribs. It whipped that scowl from Dib pretty quick and placed a grin on her own face. "Let's head to bed then." She snagged her arm around Gaz's waist to tug the girl from the bathroom back to her own room. "Sleep, though, not an option," the Irken added with a mused smirk on her lips.

The words made Dib feel sicker than that one kick had. Hearing his sister's laughter after the words caused him to grip at the rug beneath him as hard as he could. He didn't move at all, not until he could just barely hear the sound of a door close. Only then did he shift around, and scramble towards the trash can. He dug deep inside, grabbing at the first bottle he could capture in his hand. With wide eyes he looked inside, but there was nothing left. It was completely empty. Even when he moved his head to look inside the trash there were no pills to be seen. He dropped the bottle he still held to the tile and let out a defeated noise. They were all going to come back and there was nothing he could do.

He could feel them, churning, moving, just behind his eyes. They could taste Dib's despair and salty tears welling up in his bruised eyes. It would soon be their turn to take a more personal chunk from Dib, and there was nothing to stop them now. They were waiting now, waiting for Dib to crawl into bed, to sleep, that was their time. The unconscious mind was their playground, and Dib's personal, limitless torture chamber.

Dib knew what would happen and he didn't want to face it. He eyed the bottle that was rolling from side to side on the floor for so long before he finally picked it up and placed it back in the trash. He didn't know what to do. He was scared to try and sleep. He was even scared of being alone. At any moment the thoughts would come back and be even more vicious than before. He couldn't just stay in the bathroom, though. His dad could get up at any moment and wonder what was going on. With a pained noise he got up and made his way back to his room. If anything he could just lay down; he didn't _have_ to sleep. Although, with how worn down and beat up he felt, he doubted he would really be able to stay awake.

At his bed Skeets and Mister Dwicky's tie were there to greet him. Thankfully Tak nor Gaz thought to snag either for later tortures. It left Dib with a small piece of companionship. Skeets was specifically given to Dib to keep him company, in the asylum, when Dwicky wasn't there. The tie was more left than given after quality time on the floor, Dwicky just let Dib keep it, a piece of him for Dib on his first night home, in his bed, his first night sleeping alone.

Dib grabbed up Skeets as soon as he was close to the bed and clutched the plush as tight as he could to his chest, while he plopped down on the mattress. It helped a little to have Skeets so near after everything that had gone so horribly wrong in just one day. He had thought things were looking up. He had been so happy earlier in the day and suddenly everything came crashing down, so badly. He wished it could get better instead of worse. He took a small look around the room and let out a heavy sigh. He didn't even feel like cleaning up the place, at all, anymore. His eyes felt so heavy. So, he moved around to lay down on the bed, thankful that he still fit on it. He didn't even bother with the blankets. He didn't care all that much. One of his hands moved to grab Dwicky's tie and move it across his neck. He hoped just those two simple things he had with him would help him as he tried his best to find some sort of peaceful sleep.


	29. Sessions 29

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Morgan B.

Chapter 29

The morning was grey, and it seemed to be growing darker still. Tak had stayed true to their word and made Dib clean his own blood stains from the carpet with his tongue. Dib made little refusal, doing what he could as quick as he could; nearly gagging a few times but his conscious mind was else where. Breakfast was muffins that everyone but Dib ate, picking at it seemed far more interesting than actually consuming. The rest of the morning was gauzy, like it was taken with a shaky camera which only made Dib feel sicker.

His father dropped Gaz and Tak at skool and at the same time enrolled Dib in the same one. It was far easier to have all peas in one pod, and he seemed to take no heed or recollection of what Mister Dwicky had suggested; convenience took the place of wisdom, and what he had time for took presidence over all. Dib didn't notice, he sat in a chair near the office in wait, glancing this way and that with small jerks at certain noises that echoed near or in the halls. His shakes were barely calmed by the constant fidgeting with the ladybug plush that rested in his lap; his father had chastised him for bringing it, but Dib refused to let his vice grip on it subside for any authoritive words.

When they got in the car Dib made mention that he needed to go to Mister Dwicky's, saying he'd made an appointment, when in reality he hadn't talked to the man since last night. Professor Membrane didn't seem to mind, Dib started skool tomorrow and getting the boy out of the way so he could work in peace without supervising was an appeal.

The world meshed together, stopping yet moving so quickly that Dib didn't even notice the drive to the apartments until his dad spoke up. Dib opened his door and got out, as he shut the door the car seemed to evaporate as if it were never there to drop him off. The shadows around beckoned Dib to stray from his destined path, but it could have simply been the cold breeze causing things to sway and dance.

A cold wet plip of something fell on Dib's face, followed by another, and another; a small down pour. It hadn't rained since the first day Mister Dwicky took Dib for his first visit out of the asylum.

Dib could do nothing but just stand where he was for so long until he realized it would do no good to get sick. He hurried out of the rain and out of the cold, into the apartment building, holding Skeets as close as he could to protect the plush from getting too wet. As soon as he was inside the walk was instinct. To the elevator, press the button, get on, wait a bit, then stop at the floor, and get off. It was so routine. His mind felt numb the entire time he was walking to that familiar door, and when he stopped all he could do was stare. It took so long until he could finally raise a hand away from Skeets and just barely knock. It probably wouldn't even be heard, but he didn't think he had the courage to do it again.

Though thankfully it was, for there was movement inside the apartment. It didn't take long for Dwicky to open the door, in a rumpled shirt that he probably slept in. His eyes darted instantly down when there was no one at eye level to meet. A wide smile slapped itself on the man's face at first seeing Dib. "Dib! H-" But when he really caught sight of the boy his smile faltered and began to fade, along with his greeting. "Dib, you look awful." His brows furrowed in a worried fashion. "And-.. wet." He reached out a hand to move the dark bangs that clung to the boy's forehead.

Dib squinted one eye almost completely shut. He knew his appearance would more than likely be questioned, but he had hoped it wouldn't be right away. "It's raining." That was all he said to the entire thing, refusing to speak up about anything else. A hand moved down so he could pull at the bottom of his shirt. He felt so fidgety and couldn't help it. "Can I come in?"

Dwicky blinked hard, taken aback but he nodded, stepping back to allow the boy in. "Yes, yes of course." He closed the door after Dib, locking it in habit. "That must be some killer rain." Despite the joke, his expression didn't lighten. "You still have a change of clothes in the bedroom." He gestured loosely, unsure of what to make of Dib's state. "W-what happened with your face? I-it wasn't those girls again was it?" He rested a hand on Dib's shoulder.

The hand caused Dib to tense up and when he realized he had, he tried his best to calm down. It would do no good to act jumpy around Dwicky. The man would know that so much was wrong. "No, it wasn't." Another lie. He was losing count already. He tried to push it to the back of his head, though, and turned around to get out of Dwicky's hold in order to face the other instead. "I can't stay for long. I just came by to see you." _'And if you're gone for far too long, we'll just make that passing observation to your dad.'_ The small smile he tried to keep on his face fell away.

Dwicky's thick brows raised. Dib was so jumpy, more so than usual. "Here, let me see your face a moment." He tilted Dib's face up with a knuckle to his chin, another hand went to touch the skin beside the horrible bruising, drawing a finger near new bandages. "It looks like the scratches got worse. But they looked fine yesterday. How'd you bruise yourself so badly, Dib?"

Dib moved his face away from Dwicky's fingers and tried his best to look anywhere else but at the other. "I don't know." It was all he could come up with at the moment. He had no other excuses. With a shrug he turned away from Dwicky and headed towards the kitchen, taking Skeets with him. He set the plush on the counter and rummaged through the fridge until he found a soda. He closed the door with an elbow and picked at the lid to the can, not even opening it right away.

Dwicky stood there a moment before finally stepping in the entrance of the kitchen. "I think you do," he finally answered. "What's wrong, Dib? You called last night to talk, but you didn't say anything. You're here to see me, but you seem like you're avoiding me." He walked over to the boy and messed with his dark hair in a poor attempt to help it dry. "Something's bothering you, you can tell me." The man gave a weak smile. "Anything, completely off the record."

Dib's hand stopped even though the can was still closed. His nerves were so bad that his heart felt like it was ready to burst from his chest. He didn't know what to say. He should have expected such a thing when he came by. He tried his best to change the topic. It couldn't hurt and would probably even help him. He hoped. "Dad enrolled me back in Skool." He made sure to stop his voice from shaking before he had actually spoken. "I have to start tomorrow. I'm nervous about it." He finally opened the can and stared inside. He suddenly wasn't thirsty.

"That's good to hear, you're already getting back into the swing of things." Dwicky's weak smile widened some. "Though.. you look a little past nervous and nearer to nervous wreck." He raised a hand to feel Dib's forehead, he was a bit warm, and horribly jittery. He placed a hand on the boy's chest and his eyes widened. "I.. really don't think you need the caffeine." He slipped the can from Dib's hands and put it on the counter. "You look like you could climb the walls and ceiling already. I'll pour you some juice instead." And Dwicky did just that.

Dib took the cup as soon as it was handed to him, but he still did just the same as before. His eyes wouldn't move away from what was inside. He wanted to blurt everything out, to tell Dwicky everything that was going on, but he couldn't. It was safer this way. Safer to lie. The thought caused him to grip the cup tighter in his hands before he finally lifted it up to take a small sip. The small bit of juice really didn't help. He still felt just as sick and it caused him to lower his head even more. "I'll be okay." The words were quiet, but he just wanted Dwicky to stop worrying.

"C'mon, let's go sit down in the living room. It's more comfortable." Dwicky picked up Skeets in one hand and the abandoned cola for himself in the other, and lead Dib out of the kitchen into the main room. "I wasn't doing much of anything when you stopped by. Watching some mindless TV and considering doing some laundry." He thought if he talked about himself, that would encourage Dib to open up, if just a little.

Dib only nodded his head slowly to the words and when he got to the couch he sat down near the end. He kept his eyes down, but slowly he started to speak, trying to find something to say. "I still have a bit more of my room left to clean." It was a safe topic, but he still felt so jumpy the entire time he was speaking. "It's nothing difficult, though. I might be able to get it done when I go home." A small frown came to his lips. It all depended on if the girls wanted to use him for the rest of the day.

Dwicky set Skeets beside Dib before he sat down. "That's good." He gave a slight smile. "Need anymore help?" He reached over and set a hand on the boy's knee. "I promise to keep to myself this time." He chuckled.

The words and one simple touch caused Dib to jump a bit where he sat and he quickly shook his head. "No." He swallowed hard and finally looked at Dwicky with as much of a calm expression as he could bring to his face. "It's alright. I can handle it all." He looked away just as quick and back down inside his cup. "There's not that much left. Besides, it's just stuff that will probably gross you out." He tried his best to laugh at that, but it sounded incredibly weak.

Dwicky retracted his hand and shrugged, rubbing his hand as if it had been bitten; it definitely felt unwanted. "Alright.. well, I'm sure you have it under control." He glanced at the TV, it was nothing worth watching, but he stared at it for a moment. "Soo.. how do you like being out so far?" He then looked back to Dib; he was fishing for topics now, hating that awkward feeling crawling on them.

He hated it. He hated everything about it so far and wanted to say so, but he couldn't. Dib had to pretend that everything was alright even if everything really was awful. "So far it's okay." He ran a finger up and down the cup for a few seconds before he turned his eyes to Dwicky. He didn't like being so distant from the man, but he was scared. What if they could see everything? What if they knew everything? Even just one small touch could make things worse. "I think I'll be able to get used to it. Sorry for worrying you last night."

Dwicky gave a small nod. "It's alright. I'm sure.. you were just nervous.. about your first night out." He gave another slow nod. He then tried to smile again, trying to keep things light, and not to let his mood damper. "Excited about skool tomorrow? Have you met any of your teachers? I know when we talked about it you were really eager." His smile more. "And I'm still on about having a party here. When you've settled in better and made some new friends." Dwicky chuckled a little. "Just don't get too cozy with the skool counselor there."

Dib tried his best to smile at that and he did manage a small twitch of lips before he looked back down. He slowly shook his head and the smile fell just as quickly. "I'm a little excited I guess. I don't know. It's hard to say." It really was. When he had so many thoughts running through his head that he didn't know how to feel about the next day. Skool really was the last thing on his mind at the moment. "We didn't have time for me to meet anyone. I guess I'll just be going straight into things tomorrow."

Dwicky watched Dib. It was so disappointing to see what had made Dib so ecstatic the last couple of weeks to suddenly mean nothing over the span of one night. He leaned his arms on his legs, pressed his hands together for something to do. The conversation felt so dry, so off. "That should be fun.." Dwicky debated if he should press on if other certain people were going to the same skool, but thought better of it. Dib looked preoccupied with enough worry as it was. Dwicky looked down at his hands, pulling them apart and putting them back together, a slow, silent clapping; he soon knitted his own hands together. "Any.. um.. any sort of clubs, after skool clubs you thinking of going into?"

Dib shook his head once more while he moved a hand down to pull at a thread on his jeans. "I'm not sure yet." He let go of the one single thread and instead started to rub at the spot. He just couldn't keep his hands still as much as he tried. "There's probably something I'll like to do. I just have to look into everything and see what interests me most. I want to get as caught up with everything as I can first, though."

"Sounds good." Dwicky stared at his hands. He opened his mouth but closed it again when he had nothing to say to push out of it. He pressed his lips together into a thin line. After a long moment he looked back to Dib and gave a weak grin. "So... how's my tie?"

That question caused Dib to blink his eyes hard. Even with both Skeets and the one piece of Dwicky that the man had left behind it still hadn't kept the nightmares away. He had been lucky to get even an hour worth of peaceful sleep. They were all so much worse. So much more vicious. Even thinking about them caused his hands to shake a bit and he was grateful his hands were busy. "I-It's fine." He turned to look at Dwicky, hoping he didn't really look as scared as he suddenly felt. "I kept it with me last night."

Dwicky sat up, his smile leaving him. He reached over and took the cup from Dib's hand and set it on the table. After he looked back at Dib, really looked at the boy. He gently placed either hand on Dib's shoulders to make the boy face him, though nothing more. He tried to meet Dib's gaze, that's all he wanted right now.

Dib pulled at his shirt with his one empty hand, not able to keep it still. The fabric was twisted between his fingers as he swallowed hard and tried to keep his breath steady. For a second he met Dwicky's eyes, but it was so quick, and right after his eyes were on the cup that was on the table.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." Dwicky spoke so very quietly. "I don't have to know everything. You're allowed your own privacy. I can't help asking, and I can't help worrying. It's what I've been paid to do for most of my life." He cracked the smallest of smiles before it was gone again. "But just do me one favour, okay? If you can do this for me, I won't press for what's bothering you." He wanted to raise a hand to the boy's cheek, to give a more personal touch than the plutonic one he was giving but Dib would have just shied away. "Alright?"

Dib kept his eyes on the cup for a bit longer. His one hand that was still on his leg clenched for a few seconds before it finally relaxed. Only then did he turn his eyes back on Dwicky and nod his head slowly.

"Look me in the eyes and tell me you're okay, in all honesty." Dwicky quietly spoke. "That's all I need. We all have problems but.. some.." He couldn't help his grip tightening a little on Dib's shoulders. "Something feels so off.. It would just put me at ease.. to hear it one more time, face to face."

Dib frowned, but tried his best to cover it up. For a few seconds his eyes darted over Dwicky's face before he lifted his hands to place them on the man's arms. He kept them there even as he finally spoke up. "I'm okay, really." He was only lying to protect the person in front of him and the thought caused his grip to tighten just a bit.

Dwicky's lips pressed into a thin line, Dib's words felt like such a lie, but he said it looking him straight in the face. It was now just blind faith. He gave a small sad smile glancing down before he looked back at Dib's face. "... I believe you." He finally raised a hand to touch Dib's jaw with just his thumb. "And, I believe in you." Dwicky smiled a little more. He leaned forward to place a kiss on the boy's lips.

Dib didn't lean back, but he didn't press into the kiss either. It was like torture trying to stay so still, when all he really wanted to do was give in like he always did. He hated what was happening, but felt much too nervous to just go along like normal. His hands raised, but instead of moving to bury fingers in Dwicky's hair like usual, he pushed at the man's shoulders. The one-sided kiss was ended and Dib felt even lower.

Dwicky leaned back, confused by stoic reaction and hurt by the rejection. Dib had said he was okay, but it didn't feel that way. It didn't feel 'okay'. But he didn't question it, he said he wouldn't. He raised his own hands, wrapping them around Dib's and just holding them for a moment before he pulled them away, giving them back to Dib. He replaced the nothing in Dib's arms with Skeets, knowing Dib wouldn't turn the plush down. Dwicky gave the smallest of smiles before he turned his eyes to the tv with a blank expression, hands returning to his own lap.

Dib held Skeets as tight as he could, but kept his eyes on Dwicky for a few more moments. He wanted so badly to just be closer to the other like usual. Just to feel better about everything that was going wrong. Instead, he shook his head and looked down at Skeets, hoping that the plush could be of some comfort. One of his hands moved up a tiny bit to trace around one of its eyes as he tried to keep himself calm. Although, with how things were, he already felt like breaking down.

It was at a commercial break on TV that Dwicky finally spoke up again, though it was tentative. "D-do you wanna stay for lunch?" He rubbed his hands together, just to keep from fidgeting himself. He stared at his hands, folding them together as he glanced at Dib, his own dark hair falling into his eyes. "I can make us something or we can go out to eat." He gave a hopeful look.

Dib quickly looked up, startled out of his thoughts at the question. He was about to say no and find some way out of it, but stopped just as quickly. Tak and Gaz would be at Skool for a while, he could afford to stay for lunch. As much as he would have liked to go out to eat, he couldn't do that, though. "Y-Yeah, sure. I'll stay." His hands clutched Skeets a bit tighter. "Can we stay here, though? Just the two of us?"

Dwicky visibly perked at that. "Of course. Anything for you, kiddo." He stood up, smoothing down the front of his shirt, but the wrinkles wouldn't obey the motions of his hands and he quickly gave up. Rolling up his sleeves one after the other he gave a small grin. "What would you like?"

Dib loosened up his grip on Skeets as he looked up at Dwicky. He didn't really think food would appeal to him when earlier he had barely touched the one muffin he had at all. He did feel a little hungry and hoped that when all was said and done, he wouldn't feel sick afterwards. "Some soup would be fine, and maybe chicken if you have some." He could at least try to stomach all he could.

"I can see you live adventurously, my little friend." Dwicky gave a small smirk. He offered a hand to Dib. "Want to help me make it? It'll take your mind off of, mm, whatever it is." His smirk got a little sly. "I'll even let you wear the apron." he jokingly coaxed.

Dib took the hand offered and stood up, even if a little shaky. The words Dwicky said had him tensing up, but he tried to brush them off as best he could without hurting the other's feelings. "Are you sure that would be a good idea?" He took his hand back and buried it in the plush he held. "I mean, I did sort of burn every single pancake I tried to cook last time as well as a pan."

"I ate one after you left, and I didn't feel _completely_ sick after." Dwicky lightly grasped Dib's arm, since the boy didn't want to give him his hand and pulled him into the kitchen. "Besides, how could I resist a little Dib in the kitchen offering to make pancakes? It was the sentiment that over powered any bad taste. And practice makes perfect, anyway."

Dib stumbled just a bit at the sudden pull, but was able to follow once he got a hold of himself. As upset as he was, he really couldn't help the tiny smile that made it's way onto his face at Dwicky's words. "Well, it's good to know that my cooking didn't make you want to throw up more than you already did beforehand."

The smile was victory enough and Dwicky couldn't help but smiling wider after. "I can tell you with a vote of confidence that I don't buy corn because I like to eat it." He rolled his sleeves up higher and rubbed his hands together. "Alright. Soup and chicken. How would you like our chicken?"

Dib set Skeets aside once more on the counter. He felt well enough for the moment to not have to hang onto the plush. "Fried is fine with me." For a a tiny second everything seemed normal and he wanted it to stay that way, but the guilt was still there. He refused to let it eat at him, though. Instead, he hoped up on the counter closest to Dwicky and kicked his feet as he smiled as best he could at the man.

"Then fried you shall have it." Dwicky went to the freezer and got out the chicken, then went to a bottom cupboard and got out a frying pan. Dusting his hands off he went into the cupboard and sifted through the many canned goods. His spirits perked when Dib seemed to be, and it showed it the man's voice. "What kind of soup would you like?"

"Tomato, please." Dib watched Dwicky as the man moved around. Hearing the sudden perk in the other's voice helped Dib feel a little better. He would pretend as best he could, despite how incredibly twitchy he felt. "Hey, maybe after we eat I could help you clean out your closet like I said I would." One of his hands gripped the edge of the counter hard. "I mean, just to get started on it until I have to leave."

"My closet?" Dwicky held the can of tomato soup as he thought about the contents of his closet. Suddenly his cheeks tinged a warmer colour, the warmth spreading down his neck. He gave a small nervous laugh as he handed the can of soup to Dib to hold for him a minute. "I suppose. Though I would have preferred to filter through it myself, make it child friendly before actually getting help." He went to work frying the chicken, leaving it a moment to seek out a pot for the soup. "I really can't remember too well what horror might lurk in there." Dwicky grinned slyly some. "But I have a few ideas."

Dib spun the can around in his hands, toying with it. He couldn't help smiling a little as he looked at Dwicky. "Child friendly, huh? Funny how you worry about that _now._" He moved one hand away from the can to wiggle his fingers around. "I'm sure I can handle any dirty little secret that you're hiding away." His smile fell away for a split second. That phone call last night. Everything he had heard. It still hurt. His hand fell back down to grip tightly around the can and the smile fell back in place as if it had never left.

"Ever heard the turn of phrase 'skeletons in your closet'? Heh, well, I had a bad tendency to throw things that didn't suit me into my closet. 'Out of sight, out of mind.' Of course, at the same time it made a good place to bury things I didn't want people to find in there as well." Dwicky gave a slight shrug. "If they wanted to dig through it, well, that was their funeral." He had to chuckle for what he was going to say next. "I guess you could call me a 'closet case'."

Even with his sudden thoughts, Dib's curiosity got the best of him. "So, there's things in there that even you don't like to look at?" He straightened up a bit and chewed at his lip for a few moments. His feet hit the cabinet below him, but slowed to a stop as he finally spoke up. "You don't mind if I see what's in there, do you? No matter what it is."

Dwicky dug through a drawer. "I think you might be a little too young to see some of the things in there." He gave the boy a sly look and squiggled his brows. "Here. This is much more family channel and safe." He handed Dib a can opener, shutting the drawer with his hip.

Dib took the can opener and just held it for a few moments. "Am not." It was a stubborn response, but the answer he had gotten hurt a bit. After everything about himself that he had shared with Dwicky and everything he had shown the man, it really did hurt. The thoughts from before had come back once more and caused him to swallow hard as he finally moved the can opener and started to open up the soup.

Dwicky shook his head in a good natured fashion. "I'm teasing." He reached over and brushed a few strands of Dib's hair away with his pinky in a small show of affection. "Just teasing." He gave a small sigh but still managed to smile. "Though I really doubt you want to see an old man's smut collection." He gave a very nervous and mostly embarrassed laugh as he went back to cooking the chicken, busying himself.

The words had Dib easing up just a bit and his eyes moving over to Dwicky. He pushed every ill thought he had aside for the moment, just wanting to ignore it all. "Well, you did say I was a pervert. Besides, I think it will be interesting to see what you have stashed away from before we met." Since he wasn't paying attention, the lid to the soup dropped inside the can and it caused him to quickly look down. He set the can opener aside and went about trying to pry the lid out with his fingers, licking them off once he got the lid out.

"Would it help my case if I said they were a friends?" Dwicky turned the heat low on the chicken and thought about it for a second. "No. No it wouldn't." He wrinkled his nose. "Used smut.. that..-that just sounds wrong." He took the soup from Dib and poured it into the pot, adding milk he began to stir it. "Though.. there is something else in there." His stirring began to slow when he really thought about it.

Dib had looked a bit grossed out at what Dwicky said. He shook his head a bit as he tried not to think on it too much, and wiped his fingers, which he had just licked, off on his pants. The last few words out of Dwicky's mouth caused him to eye the man before he spoke up. "Should I be afraid to ask?"

The man shook his head. "Nnno. No, I-I don't think so anyway." He looked at Dib with a smirk. "It isn't perverse. At least.. when used right. Hm." Dwicky stirred the contents of the pot for a bit longer before he let it alone to get them plates and bowls. "I'll bring it out after we eat." He handed the dishes to Dib. "Could you set the table, please."

Dib gave Dwicky another skeptical look, but finally shrugged his shoulders as he took the dishes. He hopped down off of the counter and made his way over to the table, setting the plates down at each seat since there were only two places to start with. Once he was done he turned around and walked back over to Dwicky to look past the man. Against his better judgment, he moved his arms around the other and rested his head near Dwicky's back even though everything in his head was screaming at him not to.

Dwicky went rigid a second, not expecting the sudden show of affection. But really, he was grateful for it, it eased a little worry, and that's probably why he thought Dib did it. He rested a hand on Dib's, softly petting the smaller hand. He didn't say anything right away, he didn't want Dib to move, and it felt as if this would be the only scrap of affection that would be thrown his way in a long while. When Dwicky did speak, it was quiet, and he was in no hurry to have his request obeyed. "..Utensils too, please."

Dib only nodded his head, but didn't move at all. He kept right where he was and even moved his hand just a bit to grab onto Dwicky's own, keeping the man's hand right where it was. He stared blankly at the pan, his thoughts on too much else to really care about the food inside. He didn't like being distant, he wanted to stay like he was and if anything, never go back to his real home. "I love you." The words came out just a little shaky, so afraid that they would be heard by anyone but the person they were meant for.

Dwicky gave Dib's hand a squeeze. He looked at the pot and pan and turned the burners off. His heart quickened and he suddenly felt nervous, worrying that if he turned, or did something wrong, the boy would turn away and the unspoken rift would come back between them. With his free hand Dwicky softly rubbed Dib's arm. "I love you, Dib." he finally spoke, wishing he could add more, but he didn't feel so brave to chance ending the fragile moment.

The words spoken back to him caused Dib to let out a small breath against Dwicky's shirt, ruffling up the already wrinkled fabric. He still didn't move even though he knew he should have, but he just wanted to hold on a little longer. He nuzzled his face against Dwicky's back for a few seconds and closed his eyes. He wanted to just fall asleep for how tired he still was and it caused his grip to tighten a bit more.

"It'll be okay." Dwicky finally spoke up again. "Whatever it is, it'll be okay. We'll get through it." He wanted to turn around and hold the boy, but Dib had such a tight grip and seemed so settled, so he let the idea alone and settled for stroking Dib's arm. "Just.. please don't push me away." His one hand squeezed Dib's a little more. "I just want to help you.. That's all I've wanted."

Dib took in a deep breath and his eyes opened back up. Those words made him think about his situation once more and his grip eased up just a bit on Dwicky. For a few more seconds he stayed as he was before he freed himself, only to turn the other around. He leaned up on his tip toes as he moved just one of his hands up to pull Dwicky's head down and placed a small kiss on the other's lips. When he pulled back he gave a tiny smile as he started to speak up. "I know, and I'm sorry that I've been worrying you. I just have a lot on my mind. I'm sure it'll go away soon." He still felt guilty for lying, but he wanted to try to keep things normal. At least for a little bit.

Dwicky smiled a little more, happy to get his proper kiss and easily placated by it, though he wasn't about to let Dib go just yet. He slipped his arms around Dib's waist, hugging the boy close since he couldn't before. "You're forgiven. I guess I just have a bad habit of expecting the worst, just so when something truly terrible happens it won't hit me so hard. You're right, I'll back off. You'll tell me when you're ready to talk." He wanted to really cuddle the boy, squeeze him tight and really tell him that it was going to be okay, that he could take away whatever it was that was bothering him away. And just kiss him until things were right again. But he couldn't, things didn't work like that, and life wasn't that easy nor romantically inclined. Instead Dwicky just rested his head atop Dib's and hoped the boy didn't pull away anytime soon.

Dib moved his arms back down to rest around Dwicky as he closed his eyes once more. He had no intention of pulling away and instead, toyed with the bottom of Dwicky's shirt. "I'll be okay. You shouldn't have to worry all the time." The words were quiet as he spoke them. "Once I start Skool tomorrow things will be better." At least he hoped so. Maybe the girls would be too busy and never find time to bug him during those hours. Maybe after a while they would even forget. "Just, step by step, right?"

Dwicky nodded against the top of Dib's head. "Step by step." He held the boy just that much tighter, happy for now that he could. "I'll be right here." He placed a small kiss atop the boy's head before resting his own back down.

The small kiss helped Dib feel even better and his worries slowly vanished bit by bit. He could deal with everything later when the time came and he was back home. For the moment all he wanted to do was spend time with Dwicky and actually feel normal. He moved his arms up the man's shirt to move fingers along his sides as he opened his eyes. As much as he didn't want to, he pulled back a bit to look up at Dwicky, but he gave the man a smile as he did. "I'll get the utensils like you asked. Hurry up and finish. I'm hungry and still curious as to what you're gonna show me." He gave a small grin at that and leaned up once more to kiss the other's lips again before he turned around to rummage through the drawers.

Things felt better and it had Dwicky giving a new smile. He picked up the pot, stirring it around before he went over and poured some for both of them in the bowls on the table. The fried chicken was next and he put some on their plates, putting the frying pan on the stove. "I hope you like it. I know you're not picky, but I'm striving for perfection. Just for you." He ruffled Dib's hair some playfully.

"Well, then I'll just have to see how good of a job you did." Dib teased as he handed Dwicky some silverware and walked over to his seat to sit down. He only glanced at the food for a small second before he was digging into it. It really was good, but he held off showing any sort of appeal to the food for a little longer. He figured he might as well have some fun. As he licked each of his fingers free of grease from the chicken, he turned his eyes to Dwicky and gave the man a thoughtful look. "I don't know. I guess it's okay."

Dwicky sat down across from Dib. "Only 'okay'? Then maybe I do need more practice." He gave a dramatic sigh. "I guess I'll just have to cook for you more. Everyday, any chance I get. I'll chain myself to the kitchen, perfecting my culinary skills until I satisfy my man's appetite properly." He ate a spoon full of soup. "Mm." He pulled the spoon out and pointed to Dib with a grinning smirk. "The soup is from a can, so you can complain to me about that."

Dib tasted the soup after Dwicky spoke and gave a mock pout. "Aww, but the soup tastes so good. You should take lessons from the can." He moved his eyes back to Dwicky and tried his best to hide the smile that wanted to come to his face, but he couldn't. In the end he started laughing, his spoon dropping into the bowl as he went back to picking at his chicken.

Dwicky looked over at the can still on the counter. "Beaten by a can." He sighed but ended up laughing. "How sad. Is there more I should know about this can? Are there other things he bests me at?" He snuck a hand across the table to steal one of Dib's hands, leaning forward to kiss each knuckle. "He's not more suave than I, is he?"

Dib couldn't help the twitch of his fingers as he glanced back at Dwicky. The expression on his own face became playful as he shrugged his shoulders. "Well, he does whisper sweet nothings into my ear. I can't help but be drawn in by every single word." He bit his lip to keep more laughter in, and soon bit at a piece of chicken to keep himself quiet.

Dwicky gave a little sad groan. "But are his nothings as sweet as mine?" He ran a few fingers along the underside of Dib's arm, turning the boy's hand over so he could kiss his palm. After he drew a little heart around the spot and curled Dib's fingers around so he could keep hold of the 'kiss'. He then sealed it with a kiss to Dib's fingers. "My nothings always mean something." He murmured there.

The gesture caused Dib to keep still for a few moments. He actually forgot he had been eating until he finally swallowed and the act caused him to blink his eyes. He easily got a hold of himself and smiled a bit. Since his hand was still greasy, he moved his foot up under the table, and let it slide along Dwicky's own. "Your nothings mean everything."

Dwicky ran his fingers up along the boy's forearm and he kissed Dib's wrist and up a few. He peered up from Dib's arm with a small smile. "So, you love me more than Romeo soup can?" His toes curled and uncurled against Dib's foot.

Dib let a small grin come over his face. "So much more." He freed his arm just so he could move his hand up and run his fingers through Dwicky's hair. "I have to admit, you're more appealing than a soup can anyway." He let his hand fall and trailed his fingers down the man's neck instead. "Much more attractive." His hand moved up to twirl the gold stud in the man's ear that he always loved to lick.

Dwicky gave a soft laugh. "Glad I'm more attractive than a tomato soup can." He rested his hand on Dib's hand, leaning towards the touch, drawing his own hand down Dib's arm to softly run his hand up and down. His eyes fell closed. "Guess I shouldn't take you shopping. Whole shelves full of soup cans, and not just tomato.. but a whole assortment." He gave a soft sound. "It would be sad to lose you to chicken noodle.. or cream of mushroom. Those.. deliciously.. crafty.. jerks."

Dib shook his head and started to pull his hand back, but not before trying to push back the strands of hair that fell over Dwicky's forehead. They still fell down anyway, but it was starting to become a habit and Dib never could keep his fingers away from Dwicky's hair. "You're food is going to get cold." He curled his toes as he slid his foot up the other's leg. "All of that hard work and you're going to let it go to waste. Such a shame."

"It's for a good cause." Dwicky grinned some. "And I'm sure that's why microwaves were invented. For older men to romance little boys." Though he picked up his spoon anyway and continued to eat his soup. He tried the chicken. "Hey, this is better than 'okay'." He sent a playful glare Dib's way.

Dib tried to act completely innocent as he picked at his chicken once more. "Is it really?" He popped a piece in his mouth and chewed on it. "Hmm, you're right." He grinned for a moment, teasing Dwicky once again. "I must have hit a bad spot." He shrugged his shoulders and wiped off his hands before he started on his soup.

Dwicky shook his head as he ate. "Such a tease. It's going to get you into trouble ya'know." He took a few more bites of chicken, swallowing before he spoke. "I'll go get our drinks." He got up to fetch them from the living room a good few steps away.

The words caused Dib to drop the spoon back into the bowl as he stared wide eyed ahead at the empty seat. The loud noise startled him and he quickly picked the utensil back up into his shaking hand, trying not to think about what was just said. He was trying to forget about everything. Dwicky hadn't meant anything by it. It was just his own paranoia getting the best of him.

Dib's cup was set beside him, Dwicky's pop beside him as he sat down. "So, buying your skool supplies today?" He picked up his pop to take a long drink from it.

Dib looked back up at the question. He hadn't even noticed that Dwicky had come back in the room, so the man's voice had startled him. "I don't really know." He looked back down and stirred his soup a bit, before taking in a spoonful. When he was able to speak again he shrugged his shoulders. "Dad didn't say anything about it. I guess we might be. I would need to." He looked back up at the other as he went on. "I guess if anything I can go out later and get them. It's pretty simple to know what I need."

"Binders, paper, pencils, pens, erasers. Even a lab monkey could do it." Dwicky leaned his head in his hand, glancing away knowing he was speaking bitterly of the boy's father. But his resentment was growing with each meeting with the other man. He drummed his fingers against his head, giving a sigh as he looked back to Dib. "If he forgets, tell me, I'll slap a social service lawsuit on him." He rubbed his face, his brows and sighed again. "Sorry.. sorry. Sometimes your dad grates me. It's in one ear and out the other." He gestured from one ear with one hand out the other with his other hand. "For a genius, he's rather.." He waved a hand cutting himself off. "Sorry, sorry again. It's hard not to be opinionated, and the circumstances let me do little about it." Dwicky gave a weak smile Dib's way. "Four years..", he thudded his cheek back in his hand to lean on, "..it's such a long time. Especially since I just want to run away with you right now."

Dib clenched his spoon tightly as he continued to look at Dwicky. He suddenly felt like he wanted to break down all over again, but he couldn't. Now wasn't the time. Instead, he looked back down at his bowl, stirring what was inside as his appetite was slowly leaving him. "You mean it?" His voice was quiet when he spoke up and it was almost hard to hear. "We'll leave and just go away? You really meant it when you said that?" He gave a weak smile and blinked his eyes hard to get rid of the sting behind them. "No one will have to know?"

Dwicky gave a slow nod, watching Dib a moment. "Of course." he answered quietly. He ran his foot against Dib's under the table. "It'll be hell to wait, but I meant every word. Anywhere you want." His expression softened, though his brows furrowed sadly. He set his hands on the table, looking at them a moment before looking back to Dib. "I'll wait for you Dib.. I made you wait three years, I can wait four for you."

Dib looked back up at those words and his smile widened just a bit. He moved his free hand up to rub under his glasses, quickly moving it back down as if the action had never taken place. "Somewhere far away from here where no one can find us. I think I would like that." He looked back down and moved his spoon around once more. "No one has to know us and we don't even have to talk to anyone we used to know. I'm just happy being with you. It's the only time I feel happy." When he was done speaking he finally lifted the spoon and placed it in his mouth, keeping it there for a bit.

Dwicky gave a small sigh, not feeling so hungry anymore himself. He pushed the dishes aside and set his elbow there instead so he could rest his head back on his hand to watch Dib. "You really don't like your family much, do you? Or this city?" he asked rather quietly.

Dib dropped the spoon back down and much like Dwicky he pushed his food to the side. He rested his arms on the table and let his head fall down on top of them, looking across at the other, but just as quickly averting his eyes a split second after. "I want to, but, a lot of things just cause me to hate both of them." He buried his face a bit after the words as if he would be scolded for saying them. "I know it's a bad thing to say, especially about my family, but I can't help but feel that way."

A hand pet through Dib's hair, running through the dark strands gently. "Personally? In all honesty? And completely off the record? I don't blame you. Everyone has their faults, but theirs..-theirs is a bit much. And the people in this city aren't much better, or all that bright either. They don't see what's right in front of their eyes." The last had more meaning than one to it.

Dib raised his eyes at that last part, but the hand through his hair subdued him enough that he didn't think long on it. He let his head fall back down and shut his eyes for just a little bit. Though, his words were a little slurred from being so relaxed suddenly as he spoke up again. "Maybe it will just take them time. Who knows..."

Dwicky rested his own head on an arm, though he continued to run his fingers through Dib's hair, petting the boy's head. "Heh.. well, they have four years. After that, tough luck."

Four years. The realization had Dib closing his eyes tightly as he thought of everything he would have to deal with if the girls didn't forget. It could become extremely unbearable. He was hardly able to deal with last night and the morning after. It was hard to imagine what four years would be like. Just like everything else, though, he pushed it to the back of his mind and slowly lifted his head off the table, looking back at Dwicky. As he did, one of his hands moved to grab at the man's that had fallen from his head, gripping it and linking their fingers together for a short moment as he tried to change the subject. "Since it seems like we're both finished eating, don't you have something to show me?" He gave a weak grin.

"Oh, yea. It's in the bedroom." Dwicky gave a weak smirk. "And no, it's not _that_. You've already seen _that_." He rose from his seat, still keeping Dib's hand in his and walked from the table, bringing Dib with him. "In the closet, buried way in the back."

Dib blushed just a bit at what Dwicky said as he followed along behind the man. His curiosity was getting to him again and as soon as they were in the bedroom, Dib was almost bouncing on his toes, much too anxious to see whatever it was that Dwicky was hiding.

Dwicky stole a quick kiss. "Just hold on while I find it." He let go of Dib's hand and walked over to the closet. He let out a slow breath; this was going to be an adventure. He pushed some clothes aside and began to dig around, making idle comments about his junk. "At least there's nothing once living in here." He couldn't help the joke, remembering Dib's closet and room. "Just a lot of dust bunnies. Whole families of them." He stood up to sneeze, waving an idle hand. "As you can see." He dug around a bit more and pulled out a scuba diving flipper, and blinked at it. "Now.. why I have this, I really have no idea."

Dib had frowned at that one comment and sat down on the bed after. He tried his best not to fidget, but it was hard. He was never the most patient person in the world. The random flipper caused him to blink and a small smirk came to his face. "At least I know why I have most of the things that are hiding in my closet."

Dwicky tossed the flipper and went back to digging through the junk inside. He pushed things aside and tossed others. He made a disappointed sound as he stood back again. "Where did..-I know I put it in here." He looked the contents over before looking up. "Oh! There." He reached up to the top shelf and tugged a rather strange looking duffle bag down. Walking over to Dib he set the bag beside the boy on the bed and unzipped it. He reached inside and oh so carefully he pulled out a horribly familiar video camera. "I've been meaning to give this back.. to you." Dwicky spoke so quietly. "I lost the tape.. sorry."

Dib didn't know what to do. All he could really do was stare at something he thought had been lost to him so long ago. Dwicky's last few words had him frowning, but still he slowly got up the courage to finally move his hands out and take the camera from the man's hands. He looked the old piece of equipment over and couldn't help but try and see the proof for himself. His hands opened the case up and sure enough it was empty. It had Dib's whole body slumping, but he didn't let it get him down completely. He still held onto the camera tightly as if it were a life line. "I...didn't really think you would have kept it..." He kept his eyes on it even after he spoke.

Dwicky moved the bag down so he could sit next to the boy. "I watched the tape.. w-who knows how many times. Over and over.. Each time I finished watching it I didn't think I could feel any worse, until I watched it again.. and I did." He gave a small sad laugh, a little forced. "It annoyed my friends to no end." He folded his hands together, watching them. "I had to. It is your camera after all." He glanced at Dib.

Dib continued to keep his eyes on the camera. One of his fingers moved along the edge of it as he spoke up once again. "I guess I just didn't think you would have held onto something that wasn't yours. I mean, I didn't think it would matter." He shook his head and let his finger drop. "Things were different back then." He stayed silent for a bit longer before he moved a bit to lean against Dwicky's side. With one hand he lifted up the camera to place it against his eye. It was turned off at the moment, but he just wanted to play with it. "We should go back there. To that one spot."

Dwicky raised a hand to rest it on Dib's head. "The woods?" He blinked, raising his brows curiously. "Why?"

"You lost the tape, right?" Dib moved the camera back down to his lap and turned his attention to Dwicky. "And you said that when you watched it you just felt worse every time you did anyway, right?" He gave a small smile. "So, let's go back there and make a new tape, but this time one with better memories." He looked back down at the camera and fiddled with the case. "It doesn't even have to be anything special. We could just go there and stay for a bit. Maybe even look at the stars like we did on the roof." He clenched his hand closed tightly. "Maybe, I could get away from the house for a little bit so we could." He looked back up at Dwicky.

"New memories.." Dwicky stared at the video camera, almost through it. "A new recording." His brows furrowed and he sniffed, closing his eyes a moment before he glanced down at Dib's hopeful expression. "Yea. That sounds like a good idea. A very good idea." He ran his fingers through Dib's hair, combing it back. "I want to look at the stars again with you." He gave a very small chuckle. "Hopefully it won't rain again.. then again-" Dwicky placed a brief affectionate kiss on Dib's lips "hopefully it does."

Dib smiled at that and turned his head to rest it on Dwicky's shoulder as he started to fiddle with the camera. "I wouldn't mind it." His finger found the switch to the camera, but having not been charged, the piece of equipment refused to turn on. He lifted it up once again and turned it around in his hands, still amazed that he actually had it back. "At least we'll have somewhere to go, just us, until you can take me away."

"Rewriting bad karma." Dwicky looked back to the camera as well, just as mesmerized by it as Dib seemed to be. It was like a phantom from a bad memory, a token of something that either of them had tried to forget; Dib had, Dwicky hadn't let himself. To write over bad history, to make a good situation of a bad one- it was absolutely text book; but that suited Dwicky just fine. "Not that I believe in all that bunk but it can't hurt." Not anymore than it had already. He ran his hand along Dib's thin arm to rest over the boy's own on the camera. "It'll be like a home movie, just, not at home." He gave a small chuckle. "I'll keep the tape.. so, it'll be safe, and we'll have no worries." His other hand slipped to Dib's front, running down to gently run along Dib's thigh in innocent affection.

Dib nodded his head at the last few words Dwicky said. He suddenly realized that with this idea he was only giving the girls more evidence, but he stopped that train of thought just as quickly as it came to him. He refused to think about it anymore and Dwicky's hand allowed him to relax as best his could. His hand that was on the camera grabbed the man's that was on top of it as his other picked the camera back up. He became curious once more as he looked it over and couldn't help speaking up. "Did you end up recording anything else on the tape?" He gave a small smile. "I mean, before you started obsessively watching it."

Dwicky blinked slowly, looking at their hands. He took Dib's properly in his, letting Dib hold his and in turn him holding Dib's. "I thought about it.. A lot of, actually. About recording over the entire tape, wiping everything away and just.. moving on." He gave Dib's hand a small squeeze. "I almost did a few times. So close to pressing the record button.. but I didn't." He ran his thumb against Dib's knuckles, staring at their hands but seeing the memories he spoke about instead. "I recorded a few things after it.. here and there, scenery as we traveled." The man smiled sadly. "... Nothing great."

Dib looked back at Dwicky and blinked his eyes at the other's sudden change in mood. It caused a small frown to come to his own face and his eyes to drop back down to the camera. He stayed silent for a little bit before he finally shook his head and let go of the camera, setting it aside on the bed. He then got up while letting go of Dwicky's hand and moved around in front of the other. In one small movement he straddled Dwicky's lap, wrapping his legs behind the man and placing his hands behind Dwicky's neck. "The next video will be better. There will be nothing to regret on it. Whenever one of us watches it we'll actually be happy." He ran a few fingers up and down the back of Dwicky's neck as he looked the man in the eyes. "There will be no reason for you to record over it."

Dwicky lowered his head until it softly clunked against Dib's and he smiled a little more. He slipped his arms loosely around the boy's hips. "You know.. you can be very charming.. sometimes." he spoke quietly. He raised a hand to brush a few fingers along bruised cheek, tracing a small heart before he slowly traced Dib's jaw line.

Dib leaned into the touch as a wide smile came to his face. "I try, just for you." He moved in a bit to place a quick kiss on Dwicky's lips and pulled back just a bit after, but kept the contact between them. One of his hands moved back around to place itself on top of Dwicky's own that was still near his face, speaking up quietly after. "Thank you, for giving it back. For keeping it." He squeezed Dwicky's hand a bit. "For not forgetting about me."

Dwicky didn't think he should be thanked, not at all, but rather than argue back he accepted it with more of a smile and a quick kiss of his own, smiling more after. He slipped his free hand under Dib's shirt, running his fingers over skin and unintentionally over bruised skin from last night's confrontation.

Dib had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop the noise that wanted to escape his mouth. The action didn't stop him from tensing up, though, and he knew Dwicky would more than likely notice. He tried his best to act as if nothing had happened and eased up once more, but it still hurt. His one hand was holding tightly to Dwicky's shirt and when he realized it, he quickly let go.

The man paused, looking at Dib rather confused. His hand lowered down to rest at Dib's hip, noticing the tense reaction at the touch. He seemed to hover on reactions as he quietly questioned the boy ".. What's wrong?"

Dib bit at his lip for a few moments not sure at all how to answer the other. At least not without giving anything away. He tried to cover up the long moment of silence as best he could and moved a hand to cover up the one Dwicky had lowered. "Your hand was cold, that's all." It was a lame excuse, especially when Dwicky's hand felt just fine, but he couldn't think of anything else.

"Cold?" Dwicky blinked, taking his hand back, feeling it against his cheek. "It doesn't feel cold." Dwicky placed his hands on the boy's hips lifting him up so he could move onto knees so he could dump Dib on his back on the bed, keeping himself propped up on arms over the boy. "I don't want to call you a liar, Dib. But you're not the best at it." Despite Dwicky gave the boy a little smirk.

Dib had let out a small noise at the sudden treatment, but quickly covered it up. He raised his eyes to look up at Dwicky and couldn't help fidgeting with his own shirt, especially at the words Dwicky said. "I'm not a liar." Which was just another lie and it caused him to look down instead at his hands. He just wanted to drop the whole subject and forget about it.

Dwicky's thick brows rose and his eyes sifted almost shut as he gave the boy a rather sly look. "Then you won't mind if I lift your shirt up, perhaps off." His hand snuck to the bottom of Dib's shirt, taking the end of it. "To innocently kiss and lick the skin underneath, of course."

Dib quickly shook his head and moved his hands on top of Dwicky's own to stop the man. "No, don't." It felt so weird to actually stop Dwicky and he hated to do it, but he couldn't let the other see what the girls had done. He wouldn't be able to explain it. "I have to go soon anyway." He took his hands back and looked back up while trying to keep his voice from shaking. "And I'm sure in the end it won't just be my shirt that will come off." He gave a weak smile.

Dwicky raised a brow and he sat back some, eyes falling down to Dib's middle. "Give me a little more credit than that." Dib wasn't fooling anyone and he knew it. So both of his hands went to Dib's shirt and yanked it up when the boy was busy replying.

Dib's eyes widened and his voice stopped short. The smile fell from his face and he quickly tried to stop Dwicky from yanking his shirt up, but the man had already pulled most of it up by them time he was able to try and yank it back down. That one fact caused Dib to give in and drop his hands back down with a shaky noise as he looked away. He was too scared to look at Dwicky.

Dib could feel Dwicky's gaze follow over each welt, he could imagine the horror on his face or concern that would furrow his brows until something ached. He could feel slow, ever so careful fingers touch over the worst of bruises at his ribs, touching so gently like anything beneath his fingers could collapse from it and shatter away. But worst of all Dib could fell Dwicky's head fall on the unmarred part of his chest, his shoulders slumping heavily and there was something defeated in the action. "W-why, Dib?" The man's quiet voice shook.

Dib couldn't answer that question. He wanted to so badly, but he couldn't. Instead, he lifted his hands back up and wrapped them around the back of Dwicky's head, burying his fingers in the man's hair as he looked down at him. He didn't really know what to say. Everything that would come out of his mouth would end up giving away what was going on. So, he spoke the only safe words he could and the only real words he knew to say. "It's not that bad."

Dwicky's shoulders tensed, tightened, but not from the touch. He gave into the touch, burying his face more so against the boy's chest; he couldn't look at Dib, but he wanted to be closer than before. "That's not good enough," his tone broke and he slowly shook his head.

One of Dib's hands tightened into a fist at those words. He didn't know what else to say. They would tell and then he would have nothing. He wouldn't have Dwicky anymore. It was safer just to stay silent and pretend the situation had never happened, despite how upset they both were and the evidence that was so clear.

Dwicky's shoulders began to shake and he retracted one of his hands from Dib's shirt to his own hidden face. He didn't move after that, or say anything, just gave a wet sniff and kept his head heavily against Dib's chest.

The movement and sound caused Dib to frown. He had never meant to upset Dwicky. He had never even meant for the man to find out. Slowly he moved his hands down and pulled at Dwicky's shirt to coax the man further up his body. Once they were face to face he moved his hands up to move his thumbs across the other's cheeks. He tried to give a small smile, but it didn't want to stay. "It'll be okay, really."

Dwicky raised a hand to rub the wet away from his eyes, his cheeks growing warmer to be caught in such a state. Though he couldn't find himself to look at Dib. The bruises were there too, proof of something that Dib didn't want to say. "Did they do it?" he asked in a quiet ragged tone. "Did _he_ do it? Your dad? Some random guy on the street? Did you do it?" Dwicky shook his head and rubbed his forehead with his pinky and ring finger. "..Bruises don't just happen on their own. I don't get it, Dib." He desperately searched Dib's face for an answer that he wouldn't give.

Dib tensed up once more at each of the last few things Dwicky said. His hands that were still near the man's face twitched for a moment before going slack again. He tried to keep as calm as he could, but he was much too scared. Dwicky wanted answers that he couldn't give. "It's nothing to worry about." That time his voice actually shook, but he couldn't help it. "Really, it's not."

Dwicky crawled closer, hugging his arms at Dib's shoulders, he rested his cheek beside Dib's, his forehead against the boy's clavicle. "If it's nothing to worry about.. why can't you tell me?" His fingers played at Dib's hair, running through it almost meekly, though it was tough to say just who he was trying to comfort.

Dib swallowed hard and knew the action would be felt. Everything was becoming harder and harder to answer. His hands moved back around Dwicky's neck and he rested his head on top of the man's own. He tried to think of something to say and after a few moments he spoke up. "Because, it's something that I can handle."

That had Dwicky slumping heavily, he couldn't keep himself up anymore. Perhaps it was a motion of defeat, for he didn't say anything after that.

Dib kept the small sound in, that the entire situation had him wanting to let out. He felt horrible and the sick feeling from before was starting to come back as well. There was nothing else he could say and he was too afraid to say anything else, anyway. He buried his face against Dwicky's hair and tried to curl in closer to the man. It was the only real comfort he could give while he tried to push the sickness away.

Eventually Dwicky moved, shifting to his side so he could wrap his arms around Dib's waist, it was a needy action, though the strength behind it was weak. He rubbed his face against Dib's chest, burying it against the gathered fabric of the boy's shirt. He curled closer, taking such pathetic comfort in someone who he'd always been the one to give comfort to. Things shouldn't have been falling to pieces, not when everything had been so perfect, so whole yesterday. It wasn't suppose to feel so estranged, this boy in his arms; the tighter he held him, the further Dib felt so far away.

Dib didn't protest at all and kept his arms around Dwicky even when the man moved. The fact that it was easy to tell Dwicky was so upset made Dib feel even worse. He had tried to make the best out of the small visit to the apartment, but it hadn't gone well at all. His arms tightened just a bit and he finally spoke up once again, afraid that at any moment Dwicky would suddenly be snatched away from him. "I love you so much."

Those few words caused a shiver that could be felt throughout Dwicky. He felt so disgusted with himself, that he couldn't do anything but break down on the someone who needed him most to be strong. But he just couldn't right now, not after what Dib just said; it hurt too much. He tried, but he was just as human.

Dwicky's shoulders shook and the choked sob that he'd fought so desperately to keep inside was let out. One step forward, six steps back. he tried to return Dib's sentiment but his voice cracked and all he could do was cling tighter and hope that was enough;.. but it wasn't.

The one small sob that Dib heard caused him to let out a tiny noise of his own. He felt more and more like breaking down and just telling Dwicky everything, but he didn't doubt at all that the girls would keep their word. It was so hard to stay silent, though. Especially when it was hurting them both. So, he tried to give what little comfort he could, moving one of his hands down along Dwicky's back and under the man's shirt. He ran his hand up and down much like the other would do to him on so many occasions. His other hand moved through Dwicky's hair as he tried his best to sooth him.

Dib could feel Dwicky silently shake, the man's shoulders tightening as he tried to keep each involuntary sob silent, but it seemed to do little good. Dwicky wanted to apologize, pull himself together, but he couldn't, he just couldn't. Dib was the only one who knew everything, that was giving him the comfort he needed so badly, but it was Dib who he was worried senseless about. It was all crashing down, all the guilt, worse than it had in the bathroom at the mental hospital, for now he had someone to cling to. But he knew if he let out the noise, the sob he wanted to, that he wouldn't stop and he'd fall apart, throwing himself into confession right there and then. So Dwicky chose to just curl closer to Dib with a weak noise caught in his throat, letting silent unadmitted tears dampen the boy's shirt.

Dib's own eyes were stinging, but he refused to cry. It would only make the situation worse and he didn't want to upset Dwicky more than he had. He said he could handle everything and he would. He didn't want to break apart and make it seem like he already couldn't deal with it all. He tried his best to keep his own emotions under control in order to continue comforting Dwicky, placing a small kiss on top of the man's head before he went back to running his fingers through hair. "Everything will be okay." He tried to keep his voice as strong as he could, he didn't want to crack. "It will all be okay."

It didn't feel like it would, there was no ground to those words, no proof, not when Dib wouldn't admit to why or how. But that didn't matter right now. Dwicky drank in the comfort, sucking in a ragged breath, even if it was stifled against Dib's now damp shirt. He swallowed thickly, and of all things to do he tugged Dib's shirt back down, smoothing the horrid wrinkles he'd left, burying his face back against the boy's chest; out of sight, out of mind. He could only hug Dib tighter.

The one small action had Dib letting out another noise that he couldn't keep in. He allowed Dwicky to hold him as tight as the man wanted, giving the comfort as well as taking some of it for himself. His hand still ran up and down Dwicky's back, but slowed down bit by bit until he was tracing lazy patterns on skin. "I'm sorry." And he really was. For all of it. For upsetting Dwicky so much, making the man worry, not being able to tell him everything. Most of all he was sorry for lying.

For an instant Dwicky didn't want to forgive, he didn't want to accept the apology, he wanted to yell at the boy, tell just how horrible he felt, scream at the boy until he told him want he wanted to hear, until Dib told him what was really wrong; to reject the comfort, the kindness. But as quickly as his anger flared, it died away, drawn away by a small thin finger on his back. He loved Dib too much to stay mad, to hold a grudge; Dib was right, he always won. The boy would always be forgiven. "I love you," he finally managed to choke out in a small voice. "I'm so in love with you. I--I can't get enough of you, Dib. You leave an-and I do nothing but sit on my couch- o-or lay sleeplessly in bed wondering what you're doing, are you okay, do you miss me, are you happy, does it hurt just as much when you're alone too, does the time just crawl as slowly by for you too." Dwicky gave a wet inhale as he rubbed his nose, not bothering with his wet eyes. "... Sometimes all I do is just sit around and think about 'what if's, just waiting." He slowly ran his hand up Dib's side then back down, continuing the weak motion. "I'm in too deep, maybe over my head... I don't think I can lose you after loving you so much." His hand stopped, grasping Dib's shirt so tightly after.

The last words caused Dib to shut his eyes tightly as he tried to push down the guilt that came back full force. His hand that was still buried in Dwicky's hair, closed tightly for a moment before going slack once more. That's when he finally spoke up, but for once he didn't try to stop his voice from cracking. "I never thought I would have something like this, ya know? Someone that cared so much about me." He opened his eyes and stared blankly down at the top of Dwicky's head, giving into the tears that tried to fall. "Every time you say that you love me I just want to hear it again and again because I'm so afraid that one day I'll stop hearing it." He moved his one hand away from Dwicky's back and placed it on top of the man's own. "I miss you so much when I have to be away from you. All I want to do is stay here and be with you, but I can't, and that makes it so much harder."

Dwicky raised his head from Dib's chest, crawling up to kiss Dib, the boy's tears causing him to choke back a sob. "I love you. I love you Dib." New tears rolled down his cheeks, but he didn't care. He kissed Dib again. "I love you, I love you, I love you. I love you so godamn much. And I'll never stop, and I'll never leave you, and you'll never stop hearing it." He pressed his lips to Dib's again, hard but endearingly, letting them linger before he pulled back. He let out a broken sound, his eyes ached and so did the inside of his chest and he didn't bother to wipe away the new tears but he managed to smile just a little bit. "... I love you Dib.. so much."

Dib stared up at Dwicky with wide eyes that were still wet. After a few moments a small noise left him that he quickly tried to cover up as he lifted his arms and placed them around Dwicky's neck, pulling the man down. He pressed a kiss to the other's lips, longer than the rest, wanting to be as close as he could to make up for everything he couldn't tell Dwicky. He wanted to believe everything Dwicky said, but he was still scared that he may never actually hear the words ever again.

Dwicky kissed Dib's lips one more time before he raised a hand to wipe the wet streaks from Dib's cheek, turning his hand over to wipe the other side so very gently. He rested his head back down on Dib's chest, giving another wet sniff. "I love you," he quietly spoke. He continued to stroke the boy's cheek with his fingers, ".. and that's why all of this hurts so much. I'm sorry.. for all of this- I want to trust you- no, I trust you. But it still hurts." Dwicky moved forward again to press a small kiss to the boy's lips. "Don't ever put yourself out on a limb for me.. Don't hurt yourself _ever_ because .. of me." His brows furrowed as he rested back down on Dib's chest.

Dib opened his mouth after those words, but just as quickly he closed it. He was afraid that if he spoke up he would say too much. Instead, he nodded his head just a bit, hoping the action would be enough. One of his hands moved up to rub under his glasses at the tears which refused to stop falling from his eyes. His other hand stayed around Dwicky so he could move fingers up and down the back of the man's head. He had to believe in his own words and just hope that everything would be okay at some point.

Dib's glasses were plucked from his face, carefully closed and then set on the nearby nightstand. Dwicky crawled up until they were level enough that he could nuzzle his wet cheek against Dib's. He shifted beside the boy so he could slip his arms around him, possessively keeping him close. There he allowed his eyes to shut, soothed by the fingers through his hair, he let out a heavy ragged sigh.


	30. Sessions 30

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7/Morgan B.

Chapter 30

It was a new day and that meant getting up extra early for the promise of starting Skool. It was something Dib didn't actually feel like doing at all. Even after so many days of feeling excited about being out and getting to be normal, he just didn't want to go through with it. The girls hadn't been kind to him on his return home and he had a broken finger, scratches, and several bruises to prove it. All of which he had tried his best to mend himself; the finger was the worst to patch up.

Dib threw on a sweater (despite the warm weather outside) to cover up the wounds a normal shirt wouldn't hide. After that he skipped breakfast. He didn't think he could handle it anyway. Only once did he notice the small amused looks that both Tak and Gaz seemed to be giving him as all three of them headed out the door to the bus. He felt so twitchy the entire walk. Not being able to take his pills had made things worse and his sleep had amounted to none.

At Skool each of them went their separate ways, which was fine with him. Dib wasn't allowed in class yet and was told he would be given a short tour. He felt like everyone's eyes were on him as he stood near the small office door. Each student that walked by trying to get to class seemed as if they were speaking about him. As if they would jump at him at any moment. That they knew something they shouldn't have. Standing in one spot was becoming unbearable, especially in a place that was unfamiliar, and he wanted so much to take the plush that he had brought along out of his bag.

_'See that new boy?'_

_'Isn't that the new boy?'_

_'Yea. I heard he's --'_ the voices petered away, melting into others that suddenly became audible around Dib.

_'He looks so weird. What's his problem?'_

_'Didn't you know he's-'_

_'From the- --lum. Oh my god, look at his f-'_

_'Shhh!'_

The multiple voices of passing students hushed to a volume that Dib could barely pick up. But every so often a word would pop up that he thought he knew, unkind words, mean whispers. The blurs of students merged with each other, passing by so quickly while others seemed to slow painfully, melting away from Dib's vision.

_'I hear he's sleeping with that old elementary skool counselor,'_ a girl's voice whispered hoarse against the back of Dib's neck; but he felt no breath.

Each voice had Dib bowing his head lower and lower. It was the only way he knew to get away from them all. That last whisper, though, caused his head to move right back up. In one movement he turned around with wide eyes to look behind himself. There was nothing but the wall that met his eyes. He had heard the words loud and clear, though, and it caused him to let out a small noise as he turned back around, moving his eyes around the hall as if the secret had suddenly been let out.

False eyes and a green face were suddenly dead center in Dib's vision. The green teenager stood, her all consuming right in Dib's face, narrowing one eye more so than the other as he looked the boy over with a scrutinizing gaze, as if he couldn't believe the sight before him. " _Dib_." Zim drew out the name with slow, loathing familiarity, taking a daring step nearer. "What are _you_ doing here?"

Dib couldn't breathe for what felt like forever. Not even after Zim spoke did he dare say one word. All he could do was stare at the face in front of him and take a step back as the other took a step forward. The hand without injuries moved up to clutch a strap on his bag as tightly as he could. He wanted so badly to think of a way to get out of the situation he was in, but he had nothing. All he could do was finally stutter out a few words and hope it was enough to make Zim go away. "D-Dad... enrolled me... here..."

"Enrolled!? He enrolled you in the nut farm-- but now you're out in MY park, MY city, MY empire." Zim took another step forward and shook his head, relishing in the glorious difference of height he had obtained. "Oh no. This isn't how the plan is suppose to work. This isn't right. You're right back where you started. This isn't right. Not at all." A gloved claw snapped out and shoved Dib back and Zim continued to near step by step. "You were supposed to stay in there. The Earth is supposed to be mine." Gloves squeaked as they tightened into seething fists. "But your witty sister and that vulgar Tak-!" Zim bared his rigid teeth in a sneer. "I am going to right this minor setback."

The push had caused Dib to let out a scared noise, but he tried so hard to cover it up. Each word Zim said caused panic to rise up in him and he had to keep reminding himself that things that he thought were once real, weren't real at all. It wasn't working. He just couldn't stop the frightened noises that kept coming, and even when he spoke his voice tried to crack. "I don't want anything to do with you, Zim. Just leave me alone."

"You want nothing to do with Zim!?" Zim's voice pitched, and his shriek caused a few passer-by students to stop and stare. He shoved Dib with both of his hands fiercely this time. "I think you've forgotten who you are, and who Zim is, Dib-worm. _I_ am conquering the world and _you_ won't stop me!"

The rough treatment hurt worse than Dib wanted to let on, but Zim's hands had pressed against fresh wounds and he couldn't help the noise. He quickly shut his mouth as soon as it passed and his eyes moved around to the few students that were watching. He hadn't wanted attention, at least not this kind. "You're not conquering anything, Zim. So leave me alone, like I asked." As soon as the words left he knew he shouldn't have said them and he felt even more frightened than before.

Zim's hand lashed out and grasped the front of Dib's sweater, shoving him back until the boy's back hit the wall none too kindly. He glanced and noticed the attention they were getting but narrowed his eyes back at Dib. "So you're the new student, and I'm to show around the skool. Ironic, and somehow fitting." He sneered at Dib. "Maybe Zim will show you the top of the skool and then the teacher parking lot all in one go."

Dib flinched as pain ran through his body, but what ran through his mind was something that had his body slumping. They were clawing at him, biting and clawing, and it made him want to tear them out so badly, but he couldn't breakdown anymore. He didn't want to hurt himself anymore, he had promised. There was one person he could hurt, though. He was so close. His better hand shot up to grip Zim's arm, wanting nothing more but to scratch that green skin off.

Dib's nails weren't long, nor were they sharp, but Zim hissed angrily at the boy anyway, slamming him against the wall again to shake the attack off. But the beginnings of a fight were starting to pick up a crowd of loiterers. "Let's take this outside, Dib-monkey." He turned, dragging Dib towards the door.

Dib dug his feet into the floor, pulled at Zim's arm, anything to get the other off him. He knew he was shouting, yelling, as loud as he could for the other to leave him alone, but he couldn't hear himself over the screaming inside. It was getting worse and starting to pound at his head. He gave wide-eyed looks at every other person that was watching, but they wouldn't help. They never helped. Never before and certainly not now.

Zim jerked his arm back and stepped a few feet away, startled by Dib's sudden hysterics. The boy truly had become something crazy since last he'd seen him; even _crazier_ than usual. "What in the Tallest has happened to you? ...You've lost something vital in your brain, haven't you? Something comes loose and rattles inside that big head of yours, doesn't it?" He eyed the boy, stepping closer once more.

Dib stepped back, not wanting Zim anywhere near him since he was finally free. His eyes were much too wide to be called normal and his whole body was shaking. His hands had dropped back down to his sides, but they were twitching so badly and ready to claw at the first thing they came into contact with, despite the lack of nails. It didn't even matter if it was himself. "Get away from me..." They were the only few words he could manage to get out for the moment.

The green boy didn't seem to listen; if anything Dib's frantic words provoked him to take that daring step forward. He raised a hand to gesture with his gloved fingers, the vinyl-like material softly squeaking as he splayed fingers in a loose gesture. "But why, when it's so fun to watch you twitch worse than that gerbil I crammed an electrical wire into --then slammed several volts of electricity through." Zim stepped nearer. "Maybe that's what you need. It'll sane you up." He raised either of his claws, wiggling them in a slow menacing fashion. "You really don't act all that much better, Dib-worm. In fact, I think you could use another few years in that nut box." He stomped forward suddenly.

The last few words and sudden movement had Dib's whole body becoming completely tense. He wanted to step back and move away, but he couldn't. He didn't feel like he had control over his own body anymore. The one step Zim took caused Them to claw at him even more; he could feel the scratches they left and he couldn't take it. He just wanted to get away from the other so that all of the clawing would stop. It hurt so much.

"I said get away!" Dib hadn't even realized he screamed the words at Zim, nor did he realize the horrible scowl that twisted it's way onto his face as he did. It all fell away when he heard his own voice echoing, bouncing off the walls of the hallway, and had him shaking even more.

Zim's antenna twitched under his wig at the shriek. "How did a crazy like you get out? The way you are now, Dib-human, you should be more in there now than ever." He paused a moment before the corner of his lips upturned, pulling back to reveal the sharp teeth in a crooked sort of smirk. "That guy, he did it. Didn't he? So protective were you of him at the park." He jabbed a finger Dib's way. "I knew I'd seen him before, all your ugly human faces look the same, but I knew I recognized him. Zim forgets no one."

Dib could feel his heart pounding in his chest at Zim's words. He almost couldn't catch his breath enough for how heavy he was breathing. He couldn't keep his hands still anymore, he had to tear at something, and his sweater became a victim. His fingers twisted and pulled at the end of the fabric as his shaky voice spoke up, trying to deny everything the other teen said. "You don't know what you're talking about. Just like always."

"I remember. You tried to get the proof on camera with him. Though I never did figure out how you knew where to be." Zim shook his head and stepped nearest to Dib. "But your little friend flew faaar faaar away with another bunch of aliens, I got my super weapons and we left you aaall alone to scream, cry and throw your sad little Dib-baby fit." He cackled cruelly, stepping to the boy's side to walk around Dib. "You keep losing. Loss after loss after loss, I guess you finally learned there's no point, and gave up... the fight to save Earth." He jabbed quickly at the boy's shoulder.

Dib shot his hand up to grab at the finger. It was a dangerous situation and Dib did not want to be touched. Especially not by Zim. He couldn't stand the touch and the hurtful poking that the other was inflicting on wounds that couldn't be seen. "It wasn't real." The words came out low and after they were said, Dib threw down Zim's finger. He back stepped away from the other teen with wide eyes before they narrowed. His hands moved up, but stopped near the collar of his sweater. The one small splint he made for his finger clearly seen, finally. "None of it was real. Stop saying all of those things!"

Zim's expression went flat but was quickly replaced by something more wicked. "Not real? You, Dib? Dib, whatever your last name may be, is telling me that what happened... didn't?" He started walking towards Dib, backing him up with the intimidation to the locks against the wall. "Next you'll be spewing from that crazy mouth that aliens don't exist." He laughed sharply.

Dib's hands twisted once more around the fabric of his sweater, but he was forced to stop after a few moments when the collar became tighter. Zim's laugh caused him to flinch, and even though he didn't like being so backed up, he pressed himself closer to the wall. He waited until the laughter stopped to finally speak up. His voice was quiet compared to earlier. "They don't."

Zim blinked a few times before he erupted in more cackling laughter. He stopped just as abruptly. "You're serious." He scoffed with a sneer. "That's disgusting. Disgusting! All the great battles we've had, each encounter at skool, outside of skool. What kind of stupid Dib trick is this?" He slapped Dib's face.

Dib's eyes shut tightly because of the pain, but he didn't make a sound. His hands started to pull at his sweater once again, but it wasn't enough. It wasn't helping anything at all. He wanted to bite, kick, and just plain tear at the body that was in front of him, but causing a scene would just making everything worse. He had to control himself. He had to be able to handle things. Instead, he bowed his head, so he wouldn't have to look up at Zim as he spoke, his voice still the same low tone. "It's no trick. There are no more tricks. No more games. I'm tired of chasing things that aren't real."

Zim clenched and unclenched his fingers. That had done it; he lashed out to grab any part of Dib's sweater and yanked him along, pulling him towards the door again. "I'll show you who's 'real', Dib-crazy. I'll show you a piece of real you won't ever be forgetting." His voice fell low, determined to drill every bit into Dib's disconnected mind, "You won't be forgetting Zim so easy."

Dib's attitude turned back to one of complete panic and he began to struggle much like he had before. "Let me go, Zim!" His voice was drowned out and his words sounded slurred to his own ears. There was too much noise in his head, but he couldn't stop what was happening. He didn't know how to. He had no reason to go on with his spats with the other teen. He just wanted to get away.

Zim kicked open the door and dragged Dib out, literally kicking and screaming. He glared at the boy, absolutely disgusted with the pathetic thing he was carting around. "If this isn't 'real', Dib-worm, then explain 'this'." From his 'back pack' sprang out long thin metal limbs, like Tak had done many times in Dib's presence. Zim smirked in dark amusement as he was lifted up by those metal spider limbs, hoisting Dib up as well. With a mean cackle he climbed up the side of the skool, pulling Dib along by his sweater.

As soon as the metal legs came forth, Dib shut his eyes tightly in order to block the vision out. "Not real, they're not real." The mumbled words soon became like a mantra as he repeated them over and over to himself. When he felt himself being jerked around even more, that's when he opened his eyes back up. The climb up the skool caused his eyes to widened and he tried to close them as quick as he could once more. "It's not real." The words came again; he tried so hard to make them believable. "Just because you have some mechanical limbs, doesn't make you an alien! Even my dad can make something so simple." Which made enough sense as to why Tak had the same thing.

Dib was thrown hard onto the roof as Zim made a loud disgusted sound. "Pathetic!" He skittered over to Dib's prone form on thin metal limbs, looming over him. "You have the memory of a goldfish. But if you need a reminder for your five second memory- fine!" He lowered himself down to firmly place a boot on Dib's chest, keeping him there. He lowered down to crouch over the boy, raising a hand as he ran his claws across the darker healing lines near his eyes where Dib had raked his nails across his face in the park. "Green skin. No ears. No nose. Four fingers!" Zim slapped his hand across Dib's face again in gesture. "You fool!"

Dib was having a hard time catching his breath since Zim had decided to keep his foot on his chest. Every wound under the sweater was throbbing from all of the rough treatment and he couldn't help the small whine that escaped him after the harsh slap. It didn't stop him from narrowing his eyes on the other teen, though. He tried his best to grit his teeth and bare it as best he could, but it was much too obvious past his words that it all hurt so much. "You're just a jerk with a skin condition."

Zim's eyes widened and he scoffed so hard it hurt his throat. "Well then you better be careful, Dib-monkey! Because I think my eyes are starting to peel! Oh- oh--ohhhhh- here they come!" He reached up and popped one contact lens out and threw it at Dib's face. "One!" He then popped the other and threw the wet sticky thing at Dib again. "Two!" He blinked his colored eyes and narrowed them at the boy below as he gave a sharp laugh. "I think Zim's hair is falling out too!" He slipped the wig off with ease and held it out. "Wow, in one piece." Antennae stretched and wiggled, happy to be free of the hot, sweaty faux-hair. "If you can truly give an excuse for this- then you really have lost your mind, Dib-stain!"

Dib had swatted the messy contacts aside, but once they were gone he couldn't tear his eyes away from the image above him. The nightmares were trying to come back again and he suddenly forgot what reality was. His eyes darted around Zim's face, wide and fearful, and he couldn't help squirming as much as it hurt. Images ran through his head and all he could see for a few moments was blood. So much of it. There was a noise and he realized after so long that it was coming from his mouth. A small whimper that he hadn't meant to let out. He couldn't answer. He didn't know how. Not with everything he saw in his head.

Gloved claws went to Dib's jaw, keeping his head still, keeping his eyes directly on Zim. "It was the worst move of your short expendable life, Dib-worm, to leave that nut bar and come back to skool." The Irken's fingers started to dig into Dib's skin, clutching tighter the boy's jaw. "What was even worse a move was denying Zim, what and especially who he is." He bared his teeth, leaning closer to the quivering mess below. "This horrid deed deserves unspeakable punishment."

Dib tried his best to move away, but Zim had too much of a tight grip. All he could do was shut his eyes and wish that he could press further and further against the roof. It didn't seem to be working and the harder Zim held onto his face the more each bruise and scratch continued to hurt. "Please..." He couldn't stop the words from coming out. "Leave me alone..." His eyes opened back up and seeing Zim's own so close caused him to stop breathing for a quick moment before the frightened sounds he let out got louder.

"No. I won't. Not until you give me something, Dib-worm." Zim spat the words in Dib's face. "Not until you promise me something worth letting you get off this roof other than dropping your pathetic black and blue pig face onto the teacher's parking lot. I want your defeat, your surrender to Zim. I want it done officially, written in the blood of Earth's defender that he surrenders the Earth to the Irken Empire." The point of a thin metal limb drew into Dib's line of sight, drawing nearer to his face. "...Where the blood comes from, doesn't matter to Zim."

Dib shivered and he was sure Zim felt it, considering the teen was so close to him. He moved his head just a bit as he tried to shake it. "There's nothing to surrender, Zim!" The shout came out as more of a plea. "I don't want to do this anymore! We were never fighting for anything! It was never real!" During his shouts he had started to squirm and his whole body had begun to tremble. His voice had grown louder and he hoped and prayed that someone would hear him, anyone at all. "It's all a stupid game that you don't want to let go. That's all!"

Everything about Zim twitched; it was turning into a nervous tick in one antenna and his face twisted in angry frustration. "H-h-HOW!? How is SO much stupidity possible in one, big, fat, pink, bruised calico colored head!?" The Irken jerked back, stepping from Dib but grasped the front of Dib's sweater to yank the boy up to his feet. "Did the ANTENNA escape you!?" Zim's antenna lashed back and forth separate ways each. He shook Dib violently. "What disturbing medication are you taking that makes you BLIND as well as stupid?"

Dib flinched at the hard shakes. Once more he shut his eyes, not wanting to chance looking down at the ground below the roof since he was suddenly on his feet. He had a feeling if he did he would be sick all over Zim. He didn't want to deal with the aftermath of such a thing. The nausea was still there, but for other reasons. There was so much fright and he was scared to open his mouth to answer the other, but he had to. "It's none of your business..."

Zim threw Dib away from him with a loud aggravated noise. He placed a hand on his forehead rubbing it for a moment before he slid it over his head and down one antenna to sooth his frazzled nerves. "...I suggest you run, Dib-human... i very /i quickly." His gaze snapped back to Dib, narrowing into thin seething lines of color. "...Because I'm going to _kill_ you now." Metal spider limbs tapped themselves one after another all around Zim on the roof.

Dib's eyes snapped open after he caught his footing and he turned to stare at Zim. He stepped back a few feet before he stopped and shook his head, not wanting to believe what he actually heard. The images flashed through his head once more and he couldn't help but feel terrified. He didn't even try to get a word in at all before he was looking for some kind of way down. There were no doors, no stairs, nothing of the sort. He didn't have a safe escape route at all. The only way down was the thin drain pipe, but it was either that or jump off. He ignored the clawing that told him to use the second choice and instead ran towards the pipe as fast as he could, grabbing onto it when he was near while trying to calm his nerves as he wrapped himself around it and slid down.

Zim watched Dib run, and disappear over the edge of the skool's roof. He raised a hand, dropping each finger "Four... three... two... one." Up he lifted onto spider limbs and clattered to where Dib had gone. "Zero." Peering down at the panicked Dib, he had a much easier time crawling down the side of the building. "FASTER, Dib." He laughed.

Dib almost fell completely off of the drain when he looked up to see Zim coming near him so quickly. He looked back down and saw that he was near enough to the ground to jump off, so that's exactly what he did. The sudden action didn't help his leg, but he didn't care, he just needed to get away. He stumbled a bit, trying to regain his balance, before he started to run away. Skool was the furthest thing from his mind as he headed down the sidewalk away from the building. He didn't dare look back, he didn't want to see what he knew he would be there.

The clacking of metal limbs were enough to tell Dib Zim was closing in, chasing after. The Irken threw many choice words Dib's way, but over the many other horrid voices buzzing inside the boy's head, they were getting harder and harder to make out.

Then suddenly the sound of Zim's spider limbs started to grow quieter, the Irken must have fallen behind. Soon the sound stopped completely; Zim must have given up. There was no more cursing, no more Zim.

_'He's going to kill you --then Mister Dwicky. He's going to do exactly what you dreamed up. He's going to fulfill your every dream.'_

_'Run! Run! He'll tear your flesh off! He'll rip your face off--'_

_'He'll smash his face between his hands and you'll watch him twitch and beg for you to save him-- but you could never save anyone, Dib! Not even yourself!'_

The sound of the limbs and Zim's voice may have ceased, but every voice Dib heard inside his mind made him run even faster. He wasn't even sure where he was going, he just knew that he had to keep running. He had to get away from Zim. "I won't let him." The words were spoken to both himself and what was inside. "I won't let it happen. I won't let him get hurt."

"I doubt that!" Zim slammed down to land onto the concrete directly in front of Dib, his spider limbs pulled him from his feet once more to tower over Dib approaching upon them. "You won't be doing anything, anymore... except sniveling, begging and groveling to Zim." His grin widened, as did his eyes, with wicked excitement.

It had taken so much for Dib to come to a complete stop once Zim was in front of him. He stared up at the other with wide eyes and tried his best to step back, bit by bit. He could try to run again, to at least try to get away again, but it seemed as if Zim would just catch him anywhere he went. Besides, he didn't feel like he could run anymore. He just felt too worn out. Although he was just standing for the moment, he could barely catch his breath. At Zim's words, he shook his head, finally swallowing hard to clear his dry throat. "I won't..." After he spoke, he felt like it was a mistake to say those words.

"You will obey Zim. And I'll give you two reasons." The long metal legs brought the Irken over step by lithe step. "One." Zim raised one finger and one metal leg whacked Dib in the head, shattering one of the lenses on the boy's glasses. "Two." Zim held up two fingers and two metal limbs raised ready to do the same. "Would you like the second reason? I can give third and fourths if necessary. Very convincing."

Dib had raised a hand after the harsh treatment to touch the new bruise which would be forming on his face. A piece of glass from the broken lens bit into his cheek, below his eye, but he didn't have the courage to pull it out just yet. He knew the broken lens meant he would have some more to explain to Dwicky and it caused him to close his eyes as tightly as he could. He didn't have a lot of time to keep to himself, though, and knew he had to speak up, or Zim would just do as he pleased. "No, I'll listen to you." He turned his eyes back on the other and let his hand fall back down. "I'll do what you want." He couldn't afford anymore injuries. It was better to give in.

"Admit defeat." A slow pleased smile crossed Zim's features, a satisfied predator. "Surrender... to Zim. On your knees." He pointed to the ground. His spider limbs slipped back into his pak and he landed on his booted feet with a light thud on concrete. "Give the planet that you've tried to so horribly to save from the Irken Empire. Grovel, beg, and make it good." He reached into his pak and pulled out a small sphere device. "I want to remember this for the rest of infinity." The device shifted and then flew up from Zim's hand, opening a side for a small camera lens to poke through, focusing on Dib. "Remember to look straight into the camera. And look extra pathetic. I'm sending this directly to my Tallest."

Dib tensed up at the command and bowed his head low so Zim couldn't see. There was no way he could do as he had been told. Tak wanted to play the same stupid game Zim was playing. If she found out he had given into Zim, then the girls would tell his secret. It was the one and only thing he was trying to avoid. His hands fisted in the bottom of his sweater and after a few moments he slowly shook his head without raising it an inch. "I can't..."

Zim walked straight over to Dib and grabbed a fist full of the sweater's collar. "You can, and you will." He yanked the clothing down, hard. "Kneel."

Dib stumbled and fell to only one of his knees as he struggled to keep standing, his head raised and his eyes narrowed on the teen that towered over him. One of his hands moved up to try and pull Zim's own hand off, but it was more of a desperate struggle to be free of the other's grip. He couldn't handle the touch. "I won't."

"Why!?" Zim's voice pitched loudly with the question. "You leave for several years and come back a pansy-faced jellyfish. You tell Zim you want nothing to do with him, you run screaming, you don't want to fight but you don't want to surrender." He shook Dib again. "It doesn't make sense! You're not making sense! Stop it! Stop messing with Zim!" He stilled and his antenna wilted back but he kept a firm hold on Dib, keeping him down on his knees. "Either fight or surrender! Pick one! Fight or surrender, fight or surrender!" Zim grabbed a fist full of Dib's hair to keep the boy's head up and looking at him, narrowing his own eyes fiercely. "It doesn't get much simpler than that, Dib-worm!"

Dib flinched at the tug to his hair. His scalp was tender from each tug it had been receiving the past few days, so what Zim had just done wasn't helping. He didn't want to fight, but he couldn't surrender either. He wanted to just forget Zim, but he was finding it to be impossible. He tried to stay silent and wished that it would work, but he knew Zim wouldn't stand for it for long. He had to choose something soon, but he just couldn't do it. "None of it. Just let me go and stop with all this!"

"Stop WHAT, Dib!? There is nothing TO stop. It is YOU who have stopped! You're malfunctioning- and it's making Zim sick!" With a grunt Zim wrenched his hands free and threw Dib from him onto the concrete. "You've turned into some soft bellied worm-- you've turned into one of THEM!" He jabbed a finger towards the many houses lined up in the neighborhood they were in. "How sad is it my perfect enemy, my ultimate rival is now nothing more than a-- a- sobbing, squirming, spineless zombie. Ugh! I'm going to ralph all over." Zim shook his head, pacing, pulling on his antenna in frustration.

Dib had fallen, slumped to his knees. He listened closely to what Zim said and the words hurt, as much as he didn't want them to. Each time Zim shouted, he tensed up and flinched back. He lifted his head at the last few words to stare at Zim with a blank expression, but instead of saying anything he dropped his eyes back down. He didn't know what to say. He just wanted to disappear at that very moment.

Zim shook his head and made a low sound of disgust. "LEAVE!" He waved his hand sharply in dismissal. "Zim can't stand to look at you anymore. You don't deserve to be in Zim's presence, pathetic human. You're nothing now, you're just like the rest of those trough feeders." He crossed his arms and turned away from Dib, unable to stand the sight of the boy, his antenna twitched ever so often. "Disappear into the crowd, Dib-human. I'm sure the ignorance is blissful, just remember that when I'm ruler. You had your chance. Now GO! Before I decide to crush your head in to put you out of both our miseries." Zim turned, still not giving Dib the grace of a look, and headed back to skool. "Just don't let me find you at skool, ever again."

Dib couldn't stop how heavy his breathing had become at those words. He heard footsteps fade behind him, but even then he didn't stand up. He didn't want to move. His body was shaking, but he didn't bother to try and stop it. The noises in his head wouldn't fade away and his hands were clawing at the pavement, leaving horrible scratches on his fingers that rubbed the skin raw. The throbbing in his injured finger grew worse at the treatment and it snapped him out of his daze, his eyes widening in one quick second. He looked around and noticed for a moment that he was alone and slowly got up. One hand moved up to pull the piece of glass out of his cheek as he stood on shaky legs, not even flinching as it came out.

The threat to stay away from the Skool stayed in Dib's head and was stuck there for as long as he stood still on the cement. He didn't know what else to do. He couldn't go home. He never wanted to go home. So, instead, his feet started to lead him somewhere safer while he took the plush out of his bag to cling to, taking his time considering it was still much too early to even be out of Skool.


	31. Sessions 31

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 31

The walk to a certain apartment building had been much longer than the usual drive. There were moments when Dib got lost on the way or just times when he just stopped to lean against a wall and get a hold of himself, trying to ignore the noises in his head. The time wasted trying to get to the building was just enough to make it seem like a normal time, so it wouldn't seem suspicious. He knew that wouldn't matter, though. His face would have been enough evidence and was grateful for the hood on his sweater, hoping it would have covered him well enough.

Dib stared up at the door marked 312 with half lidded eyes from the entire trip. His glasses had been discarded in his pocket as soon as he had made it to the door, not wanting to draw attention to them, and it caused him to squint. He had been standing for what felt like longer than a few minutes. It was just like before, but he couldn't help it. He knew that the moment Dwicky saw him the man would start to worry and the guilt would come back again. He just hoped it would be easier this time. It was the last thought that went through his mind as he knocked on the door, keeping his injured hand clutched against Skeets.

The door was answered much quicker this time, it seemed Dwicky didn't have much else to do but sit around in his house all day pacing waiting for someone to knock on his door. The door swung open and Dwicky looked down expectantly, instead of up at eye level. It surprised him that his inkling had been right. "Dib, you're home rather early." Dwicky pulled back his sleeve to glance at the watch on his wrist. He stepped aside to let the boy walk in, closing the door after him. "I would have thought your dad would have taken you back to your house after. Did he drop you off? How'd it go?" Dwicky took a second look, leaning down a little to get a better look since Dib was terribly short for his age. "And are you bleeding?"

Dib quickly shook his head at the last question and turned eyes away. "No, I'm not." His free hand moved up and he rubbed his sleeve under his eye, trying to wipe away the blood that really was there. He dropped it back down just as quickly, but kept his eyes averted. "I came here on my own after Skool. I'm sure he won't mind. I have permission to talk to you whenever I need to, so it's okay." He shrugged his shoulders and kept his eyes on the TV, not even realizing he had been looking at it until a few seconds after he spoke. "He might not even notice."

Dwicky frowned at the response he got and he rubbed his arm a moment. "So what's with the hoodie?" He reached over and toyed with the scythe lock of hair that went over top; it was horribly cute. "It's kind of hot to be so bundled up. Wanna take it off and slip into something cooler?" He gave the hood itself a small tug.

Dib gave a small whine and was about to stop Dwicky. He didn't want the man to see anything that was under the sweater, but something stopped him. If he stopped Dwicky, then the man would only worry more, and keep questioning him. And he already felt so horrible and so worn down. He just wanted to forget everything. His free hand moved down to grab one of Dwicky's and without speaking, he pulled the man towards the bedroom. He didn't care if the action left the other clueless. He had his own thoughts to deal with. Once they were standing near the bed he let go of Dwicky and faced the man, moving his hand up to pull down his hood so his face could be seen. After, he reached out and pulled at Dwicky's clothes, tugging on them while keeping his eyes on his hand, his voice low. "Take these off."

Dwicky was rather speechless; it was the state of Dib's poor face that had him stunned than the request itself. "Dib- your face- it-... where's your glasses?" He raised his hands to place them on either side of Dib's face, cupping it gently as he looked over each new swelling bruise, the new cuts below one eye. The man then looked down to Dib's hand on his shirt. His throat danced with a thick swallow. "…Why do you want me to take my clothes off?"

Dib didn't answer at first and his grip grew a bit slack. There was complete silence until he finally lifted his head to look up at Dwicky, everything in his gaze pleading with the man to listen to him. "Don't ask about it. Don't worry about any of it." His grip grew strong once more and he tugged again. "I just want to lay down with you, please. I just want to be with you right now."

Dwicky closed his mouth and nodded. "Alright." His hands lowered to Dib's, holding them and giving them a firm squeeze before he gently pried them from his clothes. "One minute, that's all I need. Just let me put a bandage on your face." He kissed each of Dib's hands, holding them a moment still. "I'll be quick, I promise." He let go and quickly went to the bathroom, retrieving a wet cloth and a bandage. Carefully he cleaned the marks, much to his surprise he found himself wiping away fragments of glass. He picked a small piece from the bloody wound and wiped away the blood. "It looks worse than it is." Dwicky quietly spoke as he placed the bandage over the cuts. He wiped his hands off and tossed it aside, running his fingers along the boy's cheeks after. "That should make things a little better." he found his voice falling to a whisper.

Dib had flinched just a bit as more glass was removed, but he didn't make a sound. He was thankful for the fact Dwicky wanted to bandage up the new wounds. It helped ease the pain a little bit. He didn't speak up on it, though, not wanting to talk about it at all. He only nodded his head in response and set Skeets on the bed as he moved closer to Dwicky, wrapping his arms around the man in a loose hug and burying his face in his chest. As he did, his hands pulled at Dwicky's shirt, wanting the closest bit of comfort that he asked for.

"Right." Dwicky softly breathed. "Clothes." He unbuttoned the first few buttons on his shirt and tugged it off the best he could without disturbing the boy clinging to him. Over his head and off he tossed it aside. He settles his arms down and around Dib, rubbing the boy's back to assuage whatever horrific thing had happened; not knowing hurt too much to say, and he didn't since Dib said not to. Dwicky leaned down and pressed a small kiss atop Dib's head, before he leaned back a bit so he could undo his pants to slip them off.

Dib watched with careful eyes, accepting the small kiss. While Dwicky was busy with his pants, it gave Dib enough time to take off his own clothes. His heart started to beat quickly as he went to remove his sweater, but he gave in and tossed it to the floor. He tried his best to act as if there was nothing wrong and went straight to removing his own pants and everything underneath. Each piece of clothing was kicked aside and when he looked back up he moved a hand out once more to tug at Dwicky's arm with his better hand.

Dwicky tossed his sock he was tugging off and was then able to get a better look at Dib. The boy was covered in bruises, practically spotted in the horrible blues and purples, it caused Dwicky's chest to tighten painfully to a point where he had to force a breath into his chest to remind his lungs to breathe. But he didn't say anything, or question. Even when his eyes fell on the self made finger split Dwicky didn't say anything, he just swallowed his voice and tried not to make any terribly sad noises; his embarrassment easily forgotten. All Dwicky could do was just gather the small boy against him, trying to be as gentle as possible against the abused skin, but without the inhibitions of clothes Dib just seemed all the more fragile in his arms. He slowly drew his hand along Dib's back, he could feel his own hand shaking, he could feel scratches where there shouldn't have been and the rigid bone of spine; Dib wasn't eating well, Dib wasn't being taken care of at all, it was neglect, and abuse. The boy was doing so much better visiting from the mental hospital, he was smiling, laughing, eating proper food and looking so much more alive and healthy. But in the span of two days Dib was falling, being beaten down into what he had been when he'd first visited Dib weeks ago. Dwicky couldn't help but let Dib's name slip from his mouth, so much hurt it ached, and begged to know 'why'; but a name is not a sentence, a question, nor would it get an answer. So Dwicky just held Dib just that closer, hoping the touch that wanted to help didn't hurt.

Dib actually let the small noise out for once and didn't try to keep it held in. He needed the comfort and wanted to be held so badly that his grip tightened on Dwicky, but he didn't have the strength to hold on as tight as he wanted to. The small touch against his skin didn't hurt and he was grateful for that. It meant he could be touched at least a little without any pain being involved. That's all he wanted, especially around Dwicky. He would have hated to lose any kind of touch between them. Slowly, he stepped back away from Dwicky's hold and grabbed the man's hand instead, pulling him onto the bed, picking up Skeets as he did. The blankets were pushed aside and Dib wasn't satisfied until they were both under them. Immediately he curled close to Dwicky, letting Skeets rest near, and wrapped his arms around the man's neck, burying his fingers in his hair.

Dwicky kept the boy close in his arms, firmly cuddled in his arms letting Dib know he wasn't going to let him go or leave anytime soon, never if he possibly could. He tugged the blankets near and tight around them, keeping everything warm, and closely intimate. The blankets kept the welts all over the boy out of sight but they weren't far from Dwicky's mind. He worried that he would brush a hand comfortingly over skin only to receive a flinch of pain from Dib; for the most part that one worry kept the man's hands still for the moment. For now he just planted little sweet worried kisses along Dib's shoulder, brushing hands along soon after, running along the boy's neck, hair, back down to shoulder blades and sometimes up along Dib's arms; each touch kind and endearing.

It was such a change, to go from cruel and painful, to each gentle touch that Dib felt at that moment. Even with everything that had happened at Skool earlier that day, he couldn't help but feel more at ease. His hands ran further through Dwicky's hair and he brought the man's head down a bit so he could nuzzle his face in the dark mess. He wanted to just bury himself away if he could. To never go back outside and stay where he was, but things could never be that way. At least he always had this. He hoped. "You always make everything better." The words came out quiet and muffled.

Dwicky shifted down along Dib's body so he could nuzzle his cheek against the boy's chest. "I do it for you." He pressed a few soft kisses against the skin before resting his head there. His hands finally dared to slip lower, following the thin curve of Dib's side to hips, trying not to frown when he felt the protruding of bone. His hand slid down to the small of Dib's back, falling lower with innocent affections. Dwicky curled closer, drawing his legs up against Dib's to tangle them together.

Dib let out a sigh that ruffled Dwicky's hair. Each touch was relaxing him and he couldn't help curling his toes against Dwicky's leg. He had a feeling that if he closed his eyes he would end up falling asleep for how well he had been sleeping on his own lately, but he didn't want to. It would only cause time to go by much too quickly, and he didn't want to leave soon. He didn't want to face anything else at all. The thought caused him to cuddle his body as close as he could to Dwicky, all space that was left between them gone with the movement.

Dwicky murmured little endearing words against Dib's chest, to the heart his head rested against; little 'I love you's and 'I need you's, little nothings that meant everything in a soft voice that was practically inaudible. His hand didn't stop running across smooth skin, following along Dib's outer thigh then back up and down again.

Each whispered word caused Dib to let out a small sound against the top of Dwicky's head and he couldn't help placing a kiss there in return. One of his hands left the dark strands to venture down till it reached Dwicky's face. There he gently stroked the man's cheek with his fingers, just barely moving his head so he could see. He didn't want to take all of the comfort for himself, knowing that Dwicky was just as upset as he was.

Dwicky turned his head just enough to place a lingering kiss against the boy's hand. He nuzzled his head back and allowed his eyes to shut, relaxing quite easily to the attention. The worry, the guilt, he pushed it all away for the sake of the moment.

Dib managed a tiny smile at that one kiss and continued to run his fingers up and down Dwicky's cheek, even after the man shut his eyes. His one hand that was still buried in Dwicky's hair moved down to pet along the back of the man's head, running through the strands every now and then. After a while he spoke up again, just as quiet as before. "I want to stay here with you." He shut his eyes halfway. "Here at home."

Dwicky swallowed hard, so hard it hurt. He wanted it too, more than anything he just wanted Dib to be alright, to be okay. But it couldn't happen, he knew this, Dib knew this. And Dwicky blamed himself for putting the seeds for false hope in the poor boy's battered mind. "…I know." He shook his head, burying his face against Dib's chest. "I know you do." His voice fell quieter. "...I wish you could."

Dib frowned at that and nuzzled his face further into Dwicky's hair. His hand moved away from Dwicky's face and trailed up to the man's ear, running fingers up and down the rim, just to sooth the other. "I love you." His words were more muffled than before, but he didn't care. He didn't feel the need to speak up too loud at the moment. "I don't like having to be away from you. I feel safe when I'm with you. It's been that way ever since you first came back." He swallowed hard. He was afraid to go on, so afraid that he would say too much, but he couldn't keep quiet. "If I'm not with you then who else will make me feel safe?"

"Soon." Dwicky quietly assured, his breath fluttered with the fingers at his ear. But it wasn't, four years wasn't 'soon', it was 'eternity' when every day felt like a year. "We... just have to wait. That's all we can do… I'm sorry, Dib. This... this is all we can really do in the meantime. L-legally we can't do anything... not outside. A-and I should have considered all of the repercussions when I-" Dwicky let out a terribly quivering breath and his arms went lax before seizing where they lay, gripping the sheets. "I wasn't thinking. I don't know what I was thinking.. A kid your age shouldn't be dealing with this kind of thing. N-not with someone my age." Dwicky retracted a hand and buried his face in it. He hadn't meant to think so hurtfully aloud like that, but it was true. The worry they had now, it shouldn't have even started. Despite all the good he'd done, Dwicky felt the route of all the problems as well; nothing leveled out.

The hand at Dwicky's ear slowed to a stop before it fell away, down to Dwicky's face. There, it cupped the man's chin, making Dwicky turn his head and look at Dib, who had a small frown on his face at the words he had just heard. "You i were /i thinking." His voice shook a bit, but he didn't even seem to care. "You were thinking that you cared about me. That you wanted to take care of me." His thumb brushed across the man's cheek as he went on. "Please don't ever regret it. Even if things get worse and worse, please, just don't regret this." He moved a bit, leaning forward so he could press his forehead to Dwicky's own while looking into the man's eyes. "Alright?" The last word was cracked and pleading.

Dwicky's throat danced with each nervous breath and swallow. His thick brows furrowed and for an instant he almost gave in without a second thought to Dib's words, his touch. Down his own hand dragged from his face to rest on Dib's chest. "…I don't want it to get worse and worse." he spoke in such a tiny voice, his eyes down casting to his hand. The man slowly shook his head against Dib's. "...and look at you," he ran his hand over the bruises there so visibly on Dib's chest ".. I'm not taking very good care of you." He shut his eyes tightly and let out a pained noise. "I've messed up."

Dib's hand went slack for a moment on Dwicky's chin at each word the man said. Just as quickly his grip became desperate as his hand slid behind Dwicky's head to bury in the dark hair at the back of the other's neck. He pressed a slow, yet, rough kiss to the man's lips, keeping the contact for a while before he actually pulled back. He didn't care that his eyes were wet, he was just so afraid Dwicky would suddenly disappear that he didn't want to let go to wipe the tears away. "You haven't messed up at all. You've done everything you can. Everything and anything. You're the only one that has cared. You're the only one that visited me through three years of nothing." He took in a breath and gave a sniffle as he did before continuing. "You watch out for me and take care of me when I'm here with you. Like you said, you can't be with me all the time. It's impossible. Please don't think any of this is your fault." He placed another kiss on Dwicky's lips, softer than the last. "Please..."

Dwicky didn't speak right away, his breath remained shallow, his chest felt like it would collapse from how much it ached. He slowly raised his gaze to Dib, and his breath quieted, and soon he held it. He wetted his lips tasting Dibs, but it only made him feel worse. Down Dwicky's hands slid to Dib's hips, running up and down the boy's boney sides before slipping around to cling. "…Then tell me what's going on." he spoke softer than a whisper as he searched Dib's abused face.

Dib's whole body tensed up at that and for a moment he averted his eyes. The whole conversation had him so close to letting everything out. He just wanted to give up and give in. He didn't care anymore. When he finally looked back at Dwicky, though, he couldn't get the words to come out. The man meant so much to him and he was so afraid the worst would happen. Instead of telling everything that was being kept inside, he buried his face in Dwicky's neck and kept his fingers in the other's hair. "You're not supposed to ask anything." The words were quiet and stubborn, but it was the only way he could try and get Dwicky to agree.

Dwicky made a small sound, exhaling loudly but wrapping his arms to hug the boy tightly. "I'm not supposed to do a lot of things." he quietly spoke, giving a wet sniffle. "But I can't help it... I'm sorry." He rubbed his eyes hard, but that didn't stop the tears again. "I don't want to think how much worse you'll get tomorrow... or the day after, or...-until... From one hospital to another." Dwicky cursed very loudly, his anger flaring inside his chest to take up the hollow helplessness. "Put yourself in my place, Dib. Put yourself in my shoes and tell me what you'd think... do... feel." Dwicky continued to rub his face, unable to bear himself anymore. "...It was supposed to get better when you were out." he choked on his own voice.

Dib had jumped a bit when Dwicky shouted, not used to the man's anger. It caused him to pull away a bit and look down between them as his grip grew just a little slack. His fingers still moved along the back of Dwicky's neck, but suddenly all of the guilt was coming back worse, and he felt so helpless as to what to do or say. Maybe visiting Dwicky hadn't been such a good idea, but he had just wanted to feel safer. To feel better. At least for a moment. "I'm sorry..." It was all he could say, but even then he still felt horrible after saying it.

Dwicky frowned, feeling worse for startling Dib like he had for his outburst of temper. He shook his head and gathered Dib back against him, wishing that when they had shed their clothing they had shed away their problems. "P-please..." his voice shook, cracking in its soft tone "Please... just tell me what's wrong." He placed a kiss on Dib's shoulder, placing a few more sad little kisses up to the boy's neck. He kissed the boy's ear so very softly and there he whispered in such a small voice "…Please, Dib."

All Dib could do was shake his head, even though Dwicky's voice made him want to break down completely. He wished so badly that Dwicky could see right through him and know exactly what was going on. So that it would save them so much pain, but it wasn't that simple. All he could do was bury himself against the man once more and wish it was enough, while letting out sad noises.

Dwicky let out a forlorn sound from deep inside his throat and just held Dib tighter. He was going to have to settle that Dib wasn't going to tell him, and that prying only made himself feel worse and above all it made Dib feel absolutely terrible. It was hard to give in, to give up; at least for now. Sometimes you had to lose to win.

He ran his hand up and down the boy's back, kneading the tense muscles just a little when his fingers brushed up at Dib's shoulders. Dwicky kissed the top of Dib's head, his temple, his cheek, whatever he could get at. Finally he relinquished a hand so he could move Dib's head away from his chest so he could kiss the boy's lips, giving them a small affectionate lick. "...I don't regret _anything_."

The words caused Dib to blink the wetness away from his eyes before a small smile was finally able to make it's way onto his face. The words felt so good to hear after he had been so scared earlier by what Dwicky said. He couldn't help clinging tighter to the other, but it was less desperate than before and more affectionate as he nuzzled his cheek against Dwicky's own. He was still upset; for the moment he tried his best to just be happy for a small second.

"...Even if it does get worse and worse, I won't regret you." Dwicky sniffed wetly, pressing his cheek back against Dib's. "Doesn't mean I won't worry when you're away from me." He gave little kisses to Dib's ear, sucking on the soft lobe, needing to show his affections, just wanting to make Dib feel better than what he'd caused the boy to feel with his previous words and worries. He gave small sweet licks to Dib's neck, sucking softly on the unbruised skin, feeling guilty for marring the untouched skin. "…I love you too much." he breathed against the wet skin.

Dib let out a little sound at the attention and his hand trailed down Dwicky's back to scratch lazily at skin, even with his small nails. "I can't stop you from worrying." His voice was quiet even though he felt a little better. "I'm glad there's someone that actually wants to worry about me." He pulled his head back and moved one hand to Dwicky's face to lift the man's head once more. He leaned forward to place a kiss on the other's lips before he barely pulled back to speak again. "I just don't want you to become a complete wreck over me. Everything will be okay." He frowned at that, but quickly tried to cover it up while moving his hand up to run it through Dwicky's hair despite his one finger.

Dwicky gave a small nod, not trusting his voice. He just wanted more of Dib's lips. He kissed the boy again, freckling his face with little kisses here and there, growing more and more playful with each press of lips; like he'd done before in the asylum to lighten Dib's mood. Dwicky finally stopped at the corner of the boy's lips, teasingly near but not where Dib would be wanting. "…I hope so." He stopped and forced himself to renege those words, squeezing his eyes shut and shaking his head. "No. No, it will be." Dwicky touched Dib's cheek with another kiss. "I believe you. I do."

Dib had started to whine at the bit of teasing, but he couldn't help it. Even if he liked the game he still wanted the contact that Dwicky was denying him. At times he tried to move his head to catch the other's lips, but when he missed a laugh would escape him and his frustration left him. It was only when Dwicky spoke up did he pay attention to the man's words instead of his actions

The fact that Dwicky believed him caused Dib to look away, but the last quick kiss grabbed his attention again. He looked back at the other and couldn't help giving a tiny smile. Unlike the rest it wasn't so forced and before Dwicky had a chance to move, Dib moved to capture the lips that kept getting away. As he did, he couldn't help the little bit of muffled laughter that came from him.

Dib's laughter perked Dwicky up completely, it was such an adorable sound, a sliver of light in all their gloom. He smiled wide, and all he wanted was to hear more of the carefree sound from the boy. He pressed his lips against Dib, kissing them a few times before he spoke. "Hey Dib" Dwicky moved to lay the boy on his back, he propped himself up on arms so he could look down at the boy. He placed a few lingering kisses on Dib's chest before he spoke again. "Are you-- ticklish?" Dwicky shifted to flick his tongue near a more sensitive part of skin.

Through each kiss the question ended up catching Dib off guard. Even after Dwicky's tongue moved across his skin, all he could do was moan quietly instead of form actual words. He squirmed a bit under the other and tried to remember how to speak, thinking about the question before he actually answered. "I might be, why?" Dib couldn't help being skeptical, but he couldn't help grinning either.

Dwicky tried to keep a straight face but he wasn't very good at it. "No real reason…" His hands tried to fall down to Dib's sides as subtly as they could; which wasn't very subtle at all. "Just...-lightening the mood!" He attacked the boy's sides with his fingers, tickling the skin with a gentle mercy considering just how roughed up the boy was.

Even if the attacks were gentle, Dib couldn't help the laughter that came from his lips. He twisted left and right, trying to get away from Dwicky's fingers, sensitive to such actions. Moving around so much hurt, even how hard he was laughing, it really did hurt, but he didn't want to stop. It was such a change from how horrible he had felt before. He really was grateful for it.

Dwicky couldn't help but laugh as well, Dib's hilarious laughter was addicting. He tickled up and under the boy's arms where the skin wasn't bruised, letting his fingers really tickle there because of it. Finally he relented, pulling his hands back but his laughter continued and he lightly clunked his head on the boy's chest. It felt so good to just let it all out with the sound, cathartic, he almost forgot how good it felt.

Dib's laughter trailed off, but it could still be heard under his breath as he settled down. As soon as he was still, he moved arms up to place them around Dwicky and keep the man right where he was. Every few minutes another small giggle would escape him as hard as he tried to keep it in. "That wasn't fair." After he was finally able to speak he only ended up laughing again, but more to himself.

"It was." Dwicky chuckled, trying to gain back a little breath. "But it was worth it." He rested himself more comfortably on Dib, minding the bruised skin as best he could. "I may do it again just to hear these sounds from you." He kissed what skin he could reach, chest, chin, clavicle. "I love to hear you laugh." Dwicky's smile softened completely as he looked at Dib. "…It's such a happy sound."

Dib's face flushed at those words, but he couldn't help smiling as well. Compared to all of the worry he had put Dwicky through earlier it was nice to see that the other was feeling better and he had helped in some way. "What if I won't let you?" He moved his hands down to slip his fingers through each of Dwicky's own. His smile turned into a grin as he went on. "What if I manage to get away next time?"

"I'd have to chase you." Dwicky moved his head up so he could kiss Dib's neck next; playful little touches of lips. "Then capture you back up, pin you back down, against the wall or the floor, and tickle you just that much more for getting away from me." He gave a small laugh of his own. "Until you say 'uncle'. There would be no fighting it."

Dib seemed to actually think about the situation, while at the same time, trying not to laugh as well. "Sounds risky. I don't know if I should dare such a thing. I mean, being pinned and pretty much helpless. What else could I do but submit?" He moved his arms back up, letting go of Dwicky's hands so he could wrap them around the man's neck. "Besides, I'm so comfortable right here. I think I'll take my chances for at least a little longer."

"So daring a man." Dwicky chuckled. "So brave to stay in bed with me." One hand was free to travel down along Dib's skin, not staying all that innocent. "Naked too. That's quite a dangerous combination there. Are you sure you can brave such odds? It isn't just tickling that you might be subjected to." The corner of his lips turned up as his gaze sifted down. He kissed the boy's chest again, running his hand along the skin.

Dib's eyes closed halfway at the attention he was receiving. He knew it was a bad idea, more than bad, horrible, to stay as he was, but he wanted to push the paranoia aside. It had felt so good to not have even one care at all. He wanted that again. It didn't matter if the other part of him was scolding him not to. "I think I can handle whatever else you have planned for me."

Dwicky paused, the subtle change in Dib's tone had him uneasy. But he disregarded his worry for once. "...Maybe." He tilted his head to the side. "But, can you handle - _this_?" He pushed himself up to kneel, pinning Dib as he attacked the boy's sides with a sudden attack of tickling, grinning down at him.

Dib laughed louder than before. He had been expecting such a thing, but not so suddenly. He squirmed and tried his best to get away, but with Dwicky on top of him the most he could do was barely move up. His hands dropped down to try and remove Dwicky's instead, but he didn't have any luck with that either.

Dwicky laughed. "Say 'uncle'." He went from Dib's sides to his neck to tickle with his fingers at the sensitive skin there.

Dib only shook his head as he tried to skoot away from Dwicky's fingers. Even if he were to try and speak, it would have been hard to hear any words past the laughter and the giggles coming from him. He gave up on Dwicky's hands and his own moved to the man's sides in retaliation. Their shaky movements didn't prevent him from attacking Dwicky's skin, trying to win just as he usually did.

Dwicky let out a squeak, squirming at the tickling at his sides trying to ignore them. His laughter pitched and he finally pulled his hands back to grab Dib's wrists to pull those tickling hands away. He sucked in a deep breath trying to regain it, pinning Dib's hands to the bed. He grinned down at the boy, still laughing some. "Th-that's cheating!"

Dib was still trying to catch his own breath and let out a bit of a laugh at Dwicky's words. He shook his head as soon as he calmed down, while his hands tightened under Dwicky's own. "I didn't cheat. You just won't admit that you lost." He let out another small laugh at that while trying to look as innocent as he could, but it pretty much failed.

"I didn't lose." Dwicky protested with a grin. "I'll show you exactly how I won." He gathered Dib's wrists up together in one hand to hold then which left one hand free to trail a finger down Dib's front to show him. "See. Now you're helpless." He chuckled as he then started to tickle one of the boy's sides.

Dib let out a whine at the position he was in, but at the same time, he didn't really do anything to get out of it. The touch at his side had him letting out a few noises and trying to move away from Dwicky's fingers, but there was no real effort. The only thing Dib did do was turn his head to the side towards Dwicky's arm and moved his tongue out to lick at the skin while he kept his eyes on the other.

"Hey, that's cheating too." Dwicky feigned a pout, and soon his tickling was just fingers running up and down the boy's side. "You're not allowed to appeal to the attacker's weaknesses." He frowned more. "Like naked helpless boys. They're too hard to resist." His fingers traced little invisible patterns up to Dib's stomach, following the contour of body.

A low sound came from the back of Dib's throat. It was almost close to a purr if it could be called anything. The touches were relaxing and considering the amount of sleep he hadn't actually gotten, he slowly started to close his eyes because of them. "I can't help being irresistible." The words were more mumbled than spoken.

Dwicky's hand trailed lower, drawing his little patterns from hip to hip, tracing lower and lower. "I know. It's something I must learn to deal with and accept." He dipped his head to flick his tongue against a nub, kissing the skin around it before he spoke. "Even if it means giving in and losing." The corner of his lips upturned. "But it's a winning loss."

Dib writhed beneath Dwicky at such attention and couldn't help the needy sound he let out. The fact that his hands were still pinned caused him to become aggravated, but he lay still afterwards and only opened his eyes to look at the other while pouting. "Now who's cheating?"

"This isn't cheating. It's a new strategy." Dwicky lowered his head again, letting his tongue slip out so he could slowly trace the sensitive skin, biting before promptly sucking flesh. He raised his head again with lazy amusement. "It's called 'seduction of the innocent'. He pressed a kiss to Dib's lips, drawing across the others but not deepening the kisses just yet. "...You're just upset that for once you're at a loss." He grinned some.

Dib whined and then narrowed his eyes when he was denied anything he wanted. He tried once more to move around under Dwicky, to do anything that would make the man let him go, but he couldn't keep the actions up for long because of his bruises. He kept still once more and pouted as his hands twisted in Dwicky's grip. "You have to let me go at some point."

Dwicky's grin grew, despite how abused Dib looked, the writhing sight wasn't completely unappealing. He gave a long exhaling sigh at that, keeping his tight hold on Dib's wrists and feeling bad for causing more bruises when the boy struggled to get free. "My poor little Dib." Dwicky raised a hand to place a finger on the boy's lips, parting them so he could run his tongue across lips and tongue alike, brushing against Dib's before pressing his mouth to the other's.

Although the words didn't help Dib's mood, feeling Dwicky's lips on his own easily remedied that. He stopped every bit of squirming aside from his hands, which he desperately wanted to move. It didn't take long for him to press into the kiss, happy to have the small bit of contact that he hadn't been allowed just moments ago.

Dwicky let go of Dib's wrists, giving up his dominance on the boy as he shifted off him to lay beside. He was done playing and just wanted Dib near again, to feel the intimacy of being so close again; to give Dib exactly what he wanted. He deepened the kiss, invading the boy's mouth, thoroughly running his tongue against Dib's.

As soon as Dib was let go he twisted his hands around before wrapping them around Dwicky's neck. They didn't stay still and tried to move as low as they could down the man's back. He gave little whines against the kiss when he couldn't scratch, but let it go just as quickly, running his hands up and down skin instead. He pushed back against Dwicky's tongue, curling his own around it as he moaned into the kiss, ignoring everything that told him it was a bad idea and just doing what he wanted to.

Dwicky pulled Dib so impossibly close, dragging his own nails against Dib's skin where the boy couldn't. He would feel bad later about leaving dark tracks along with the bruises on pale skin, but for now his mind was else where. He just wanted Dib to forget his miseries, to give in and feel something other than pain. Despite the hesitations he could feel being negated by the other, Dwicky pressed on, kissing and touching where he shouldn't. Sex wouldn't make things better, and maybe love wouldn't either this time, but maybe if he gave himself in each movement, each touch of skin on skin they could forget; at least there wouldn't be any part of him left to feel any worse.


	32. Sessions 32

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 32

It was late in the evening and the sun had already gone down. It was still warm enough outside for cool attire, but once again Dib sat outside on the sidewalk away from his home, clad in an oversized sweatshirt and pants. His eyes were glued to the camera in his lap and his hands were running up and down the surface of it, while a familiar plush sat by his side. So much had happened since he had come home the night before. His whole body hurt and he couldn't stand to be within an inch of the house behind him.

The girls had been vicious when he had come home late in the evening. They had threatened him, beat him down, and made him beg for any bit of mercy he could. They knew what had happened, why he was so late, and had treated him worse than before because of it. Every new bruise on his skin, scratch on his body, even the push down the stairs, was all taken just so they wouldn't tell a single word. He endured it and it worked.

There had still been no sleep for Dib, but it had come to the point where it was merely because he was afraid to sleep. Even at Dwicky's he had only gotten a good few minutes of sleep at best, too afraid to shut his eyes. It made for an exhausting next day. Not that it mattered. There was no Skool, only hanging out near the building to make it seem as if he had gone, to please his dad in some way. The entire time he was alone he had been planning to ask the girls about the time with Dwicky that he wanted so badly while ignoring the voices as they moved through his head. He didn't expect that when he got home and asked he would question whether the trip was worth it. He was stuck being a complete maid, doing chores and homework. The torture they had tried to inflict on his leg before was brought back, but they were actually successful this time around and it felt as if it had never healed at all. None of it was pleasant, but he got his time. The only worry was hiding the consequences from Dwicky.

_'He's not coming.'_ It always started the same; those same daunting words bringing with it the same strain and crack of Dib's hold on reality.

The cement below Dib's feet felt like rubber; stretchy and sticky and ready to snap, cracking apart to send him plummeting to the darks of some sick frightening unknown. The barrier between real and unreal was becoming disgustingly paper thin, and _They_ knew. They leaned against it, forcing it to shift and warp with their sharp misshapen bodies, hoping that one day Dib would snap and his chaos would be allowed out.

Today they were throwing themselves on Dib's reserve, his hold on the world. The fences and pens holding them in were long broken down, they no longer feared consequences and feasted on Dib's shaky consciousness every moment every chance.

The air was growing almost unbearably cold, and Dib could see his breath misting in front of him. But it was just his flesh growing flush underneath his heavy clothing.

The world was blurring in the distance, and in those nondescript dark blotches Dib could see _Them_ playing, taunting with swaying jerky motions.

_'He'll take what he wants and then leave you while you're sleeping, clinging to nothing, naked with dirt and pine needles under your nails. Stupid boy!'_

For a second, Dib didn't breathe and his eyes stared straight ahead. The words were hurtful, they always were, but Dib couldn't help listening. As much as he tried to ignore every sound and every thing he saw, none of it would go away. All he could do was listen and watch. He didn't even realize that he started to grip the camera until he felt pain moving through his finger. It was the only thing that snapped him out of his sudden silence as he finally took a shaky breath and looked back down. "That won't happen..." He was quiet, but still tried to make the words believable.

_'Sticky sap on wet skin, nothing but trees to hear you scream as he violates you again and again. Blood on bramble and poison oak. He'll make you scream worse than They did. Holding you down while you beg, plead, cleaning your dirty cheeks with streaks of tears; mercilessly tearing into you.'_

_'...and no one will care to find your naked, twisted stinking corpse, barely covered by brush. You'll rot, and rot, and rot- and your family will forget and be happy.'_

"It's not like that." Dib choked on his words, too scared and hurt to actually believe them. His eyes snapped back up to look ahead as if what he had seen had come any closer, but it was still only him at the moment. His other hand moved to his side to pick up the plush that rested there and pulled it close to his chest. Any form of comfort that was offered he would take and hope to keep. "He wouldn't do that." He mumbled the words against Skeets, but made sure they were heard. "Stop saying those things."

_'HE left you once, he'll do it again--'_

_'and again- and again and again and again-!'_ another voice cut in, animatedly chiming the two words ad nauseam.

Dib's skin suddenly felt slick, unnaturally so; filthy and used. At his own touch, he could only feel smooth hot skin and the normal perspiration from sitting in his fear. But the feeling wouldn't leave, it trickled from his hairline and down his back like grubby calloused fingers wanting something unholy in the dark shadow of a dirty alley, hidden behind garbage cans from unprying eyes, muffled against slimy brick walls and dead rats.

Dib let out a tiny whimper as he ran a hand down the back of his neck. He wanted every feeling of fright and the sickness from that one night to go away. His other hand gripped Skeets so tight, had he any real strength in him the plush would have been in danger of being torn. He dropped his one hand back down just as quickly as he touched his skin, not able to stand it anymore, and shook his head. The action was hard to see since his whole body had started to shake. "It's not like that. He'll come for me. I'll be okay. Everything will be okay." Even though it didn't feel okay.

But the air was becoming so stuffy now, congested with a stench of layers built from years and years of all things wonderfully stuffed away, hidden from sight left to rot and stink; out of sight, out of mind, how humane. Dib's sight grew clouded, as if someone had taken the sun from him; pulled away the light from his being and wrapped him suffocating in a veil of disorientation.

_'The animals will pick your crimson bones clean-'_

_'And with a gaping mouth, still dripping with cold saliva, you won't be saying 'no' a second time...'_

_'Dragging your dirty white skin along the alley floor, by your ankle. He'll keep you in a cold greasy cardboard box, cramped, broken, eaten away by maggots and beetles. He'll pull you out and 'play' with your rigor frozen appendages, wedging himself deep in new unbleeding holes.'_

Dib started to panic and because of the feeling he hugged the plush even tighter with both hands. He almost forgot the camera was still on his lap and when he moved just a bit, the piece of equipment shifted, causing him to becoming startled. He wanted to scream, he wanted to cry, he wanted to do anything that would make everything in his head and outside just go away. But all he could manage were weak words that never worked. "Please stop."

_'There'll be no screaming- silent screaming-'_

_'Screaming, screaming, screaming, screaming, scree-!'_

A touch weighed itself on Dib's shoulder, a hand squeezing there on several new painful bruises. Then suddenly the world was unbearably bright, the air was no longer dank but breathably thin and cool.

"Dib?"

The touch caused Dib to jump worse than he had moments ago. He didn't even hear that his name had been called and only looked up on instinct with wide eyes. His hold on Skeets had become a death grip and the only thing he really noticed was that the voices finally stopped. There was silence, but he had no idea how long it would last.

Dwicky jerked back, staggering on his feet, startled. He rubbed the back of his neck and gave a nervous, completely unsure jump of his own. "Oh… didn't mean to startle you there." His hand slowed as he took in the boy's ragged appearance but kept his lips in an even line. "You okay?" he asked carefully.

Dib tried to relax as best he could when he saw it was only Dwicky and not what he had feared. He stayed quiet for a little longer until he realized he needed to answer the other in order to make it at least a bit believable that he was alright. "Y-Yeah, I'm okay." The stuttering didn't help him. He shrugged it off, though, and moved to stand up, picking the camera up off his lap as he did. He bit back every bit of pain the movement caused, not wanting Dwicky to worry.

Dwicky watched Dib a moment, trying not to eye the boy, but it couldn't be helped. He then busied himself with walking over to his car, opening the door for the boy and gesturing with a board sweep of his other hand. "Let's get going then. After you." He smiled just a little for Dib.

Dib tried not to hesitate, but he knew if he took one step the pain would be horrible. Just walking to the sidewalk had been a chore. He glanced at Dwicky, but looked back to the car just as quick, giving in. He tried not to make it seem obvious and thankfully only walked with a small limp the short distance to the car. As soon as he was inside he let out a sigh, buckling up and turning his head to smile just a bit at Dwicky. "Thanks."

The man paused a moment, and for a second he seemed as if he would question Dib but he didn't. Dwicky nodded and his smile grew a little sad. He shut the door and got in on the other side. Buckling up again he started the car and drove. He didn't immediately speak up, busying himself with watching the road didn't work all too well, there was only a few cars, for the most the roads were sparse. It looked as lonely out as everything felt. "So," he drew that one word out quietly, "how was skool?"

Dib tried his best not to tense up at the question, but it didn't stop him from fidgeting. His hands moved down away from the plush to twist the bottom of his shirt, causing the fabric to crease under the attention. "It was boring." That was all he could say and all that he would say. Instead of going on he changed the subject, trying his best to avoid anything about his day. "What did you do today?"

Dib's simple answer had Dwicky's brows rising. The boy had been so eager for skooling, new activities and friends, now he was shrugging it off after two days; it made Dwicky feel unsettled. He glanced at the boy. "I got things ready for our night out; The Blanket, The Tarp." He chuckled some as he watched the road again. "Snacks, drinks." Dwicky cleared his throat as he added under his breath "Did some laundry."

Dib just barely caught the mumbled words and they caused him to blush a bit. The earlier thoughts spoken in his head came back for a quick moment and as relaxed as he tried to be, they forced him to become uneasy once more. The sick feeling came back, but he tried hard to hide how he felt by looking out the window beside him.

Dwicky tried not to stare at the steering wheel, but the road seemed even less interesting, and the hypnotic traveling movement of the road felt dry and repetitive to watch. It took another long stoic silence before new words quietly tumbled from his mouth. "I missed you."

Dib didn't expect the words to be said. He had been staring so intently at his marred reflection that the sound of Dwicky's voice made him turn his head around quickly. He couldn't help the tiny smile that pulled at his lips as he looked at the other. It helped so much to hear something that had been denied in his head. Dib moved a hand away from Skeets to tug on one of Dwicky's arms, not satisfied until the man took a hand off the steering wheel and he was able to grab onto it in his own. "I missed you too." He looked down at their hands. "I missed you so much."

Dwicky squeezed Dib's hand, his throat tightening with Dib's quiet words. "It feels like forever and a day since you've spent the night." Sightlessly he slipped his fingers between Dib's, linking their hands together, holding the other's tight, securely. "I really miss you most then..." He gave a quick chuckle. "Especially your wonderful cooking." It was hard not to tease about those pancakes; that had been a good day, the best day of both their lives, even with the hangover. "Have you been sleeping well?" Dwicky glanced at Dib then. Even if the answer was plainly to see on the boy's face, Dwicky asked all the same, even if another lie was going to be fed to him; he was hoping for those small pieces of honesty Dib would allow nowadays.

Dib blinked his eyes, refusing to look up as he tried to answer another hard question. "Yeah, I have." He almost cringed at the lie, but at the same time he knew it was for the best. It couldn't be helped anymore. "It's not the same, though. I miss sleeping beside you." At least that part was the truth and felt better to say. "That doesn't mean I can't cook for you again. If you really liked those pancakes I could always make them again." He finally lifted his eyes and couldn't help smiling as he teased the man.

Dwicky gave a weak smile, but it wasn't Dib's cooking he pressed on about. "…You have such dark circles under your eyes." He couldn't help but point out, cutting holes in Dib's words. "…You didn't sleep very much yesterday either." he added even quieter.

The smile fell away and Dib dropped his head once more to look at anything except Dwicky. "I wasn't really that tired, that's all." His other hand moved up to cling tightly to Skeets as if the plush would help him from any other questions he couldn't answer or was just too afraid to answer.

It seemed to work, Dwicky didn't pursue with his questions and kept his eyes on the road. The man looked a little tired himself, perhaps he just didn't have the energy to pry the truth anymore; falling back on his ebbing patience instead. He stayed silent, letting the conversation settle in Dib's court. This was a day to redeem a day gone horribly wrong, to replace the hurtful memory with something happier, but it didn't seem to be starting out very well.

Dib eased up again and raised his head once more to look at Dwicky. He couldn't help frowning, knowing that his answers were only making things worse. He wanted to say something to make everything better, but there was no real chance of that happening. Instead, he lifted their hands up and placed a kiss on top of Dwicky's, trying to make up for everything he had put the other through so far.

Dwicky easily gave in, and he was starting to chastise his weakness and giving nature towards the boy; it wasn't helping them, but it wasn't making things worse either. He ran his thumb against the side of Dib's hand softly. He didn't ruin the quiet understanding they were having with words. He was content to give, rather than receive.

The response he got calmed Dib somewhat and helped him feel a little better. He kept hold of Dwicky's hand as he turned his attention ahead. The rest of the car ride was spent in small bouts of silence, but it didn't really bother him. It was better than the uncomfortable feeling it had started at.

When the ride finally ended and the car stopped, Dib couldn't help feeling anxious. He didn't even wait for the motor to completely die down before he was unbuckling his seat belt and letting himself out the car with camera and plush in hand. As much as his leg hurt he still started to fidget as he bounced a bit on his good foot, waiting for Dwicky to get out.

The man shut the car door and let his gaze follow up along the trunks of trees. Instantly Dwicky felt his heart rise in his throat only to fall into his stomach. He could feel himself hinging back and forth whether this was truly a good or bad idea . He swallowed thickly, trying to push away the feelings of foreboding bad karma that he was picking up. "The trees look... um- b_igger_." Dwicky's lips tightened into a thin line and he looked up to the dark trees with dread and wide eyes. He shook his head and walked to the front of the car, still looking into 'The Woods'.

Dwicky's reaction caused Dib to stay still as he kept a careful watch on the man. He had thought the trip would be a good idea, but Dwicky didn't seem all that okay with it so far and it had a small frown coming to his lips. After a quick moment he looked back ahead at the familiar place. It was true that there were no good memories, but he was determined to at least try and make some. That thought alone had him looking back at Dwicky with a bit of a narrowed expression. With small steps he walked up beside the other as he flicked the switch to the camera. As soon as he was next to Dwicky, Dib raised the camera to his eye and lifted it up as he focused on Dwicky's face. "Stop pouting. You're on camera."

That snapped Dwicky back and the man gave a startled squeak as he nearly stumbled over. He righted himself up and stared into the camera like a deer caught in the head lights of an incoming car. He went sickly as he raised a hand and waved at the camera with an unsure smile. "Hiii." he answered in a rather high tone.

Dib let out a laugh at how startled Dwicky acted and suddenly his earlier worries vanished. A small grin pulled at his lips after the sound died away and he kept the camera on the other, trying to get it to focus once more since Dwicky had moved around. "Stop acting so jumpy. See, didn't I tell you that you were a wuss?" He tried to quiet the laughter that wanted to escape again, but it was hard.

Dwicky tried not to pout on camera, but he couldn't help it. "I'm not a wussy." he tried to argue but it came out awkward since he was growing more nervous. "I'm- quite very- manly brave. Yeaa." He cleared his throat and darted his eyes around. He pointed to the trees. "We aren't even in The Woods yet... and- you film." He gave a very shaky chuckle.

Dib moved the camera away from his eye so he could look at Dwicky better as he spoke. "I'm trying to get you to lighten up. That's what this trip is all about." He gave a small smile and put the camera back to his eye to continue filming. "Besides, there was no rule that said I couldn't start taping whenever I wanted to. It's something to do while you get everything out of the car."

Dwicky blinked a few times before looking to the car. "Oh yeaa… stuff." He glanced back at Dib then back at the car, then Dib, then the car again. He pointed. "Right. Getting stuff." He walked over to the car again, feeling much too self conscious as he retrieved the duffle bag that had everything in it. "Getting all this exciting footage?" He hefted the bag on one shoulder as he walked back to Dib.

"Of course. Big foot's got nothing on this." Dib pulled the camera away once more to grin at Dwicky as he started to back away from the car and towards the woods. When he noticed that the other was still a little uneasy, Dib decided to tease him. He turned the camera around so that the lens was facing him instead and started to speak. "Don't be fooled by his shy nature. He's actually very daring. I know. I've seen it."

Dwicky let out an embarrassed scoff of a laugh. "Oh, I don't know about that. You were down on your knees before I did, I believe. You're the daring one, or, _eager_ one, I should say." He spoke up with a slight laugh. "But my tales of daring shall never leave closed doors." He gave a playful tsked and wagged a finger. "Especially not to a camera."

Dib blushed at the first bit and turned the camera back around so his flushed face couldn't be seen on film. It didn't stop him from sticking his tongue out at Dwicky as he placed the camera back up near his eye, getting payback as he taped the man once more. "But I'm so interested in all your tales and I'm sure the camera is as well." He focused in as much as he could and grinned. "Come on. Just one?"

Dwicky cleared his throat and looked skyward, trying not to look embarrassed. He gave the boy a playful glare and rubbed the back of his neck which was growing warm. "What one did you want to hear? The time I made you scream or the time I had you squirming and begging for more?" He couldn't help but grin. "Either are pretty incriminating. 'Less you want all your intimate details on film." He pointed at each finger as he listed off "Like how vocal you get when someone sucks on your ear, those little noises you make when I nibble certain places." He tilted his head with a teasing mused grin. "Shall I go on?"

Dib had nothing to really say to that as his own embarrassment decided to take over. The camera was lowered away from his eye and even as he continued to walk back, he stumbled a bit. After a few seconds he remembered that he had the ability to talk, but words weren't really working out for him. "N-No. I-I...no."

Dwicky stepped up beside Dib with a laugh. He took up Dib's chin with a few fingers to tilt his head up to steal a kiss before he stole the camera away. "Ha! I win." He held it up to his own eye, filming Dib. "Your turn. Go on, do something memorable for the camera." He grinned.

Dib tried to make a grab for the camera, but it was no use. He pouted as he was filmed and it was easy to tell he was fidgety as he wrapped both arms around Skeets since each one was free to do so. "I don't think anything I did could top what you just said." He tilted his head and his sudden nervousness went away as he teased once more. "Unless you find it okay that I try and seduce you in front of a camera, but then we could have stayed home for that."

"Uuuww." Dwicky's grin went sly. "Sure. Do something seductive for the camera. Give me something to watch on those lonely nights when you're not there. Go on, do something sexy for me. Only you and I will be watching this- and maybe our grandchildren." That had him laughing, which he tried to stifle with a hand. "So traumatize a few kids for me." He tried to cover up more laughter.

Dib's own laughter mingled with Dwicky's, but he didn't try to stop it. He raised his arms up above his head, ignoring the fact that he still held Skeets in one. As he did, he began to move his hips from side to side while still walking. "Like this?" He did a small turn so his back was to Dwicky and continued to roll his hips, but a bit slower. "Or, like this?"

Dwicky's laughter slowed and the eye of the camera slowly panned down Dib's body to the boy's hips. "Suuure. I like... -both are... yea." He blinked and pulled his eye away from the camera. "Skeets tops it off though. The scene just wouldn't be as alluring without the ladybug plush." He chuckled teasingly as he looked back through the camera.

Dib turned his head to look back at Dwicky and grinned. "So without it you aren't satisfied? I'm hurt." He let out a laugh and looked ahead again, but his steps started to slow when he saw what was coming into view. His arms dropped back to his sides and he couldn't help but stare wide eyed at a place he hadn't seen for so long.

Dwicky turned off the camera, lowering it to his side as his gaze was held by the same sight Dib was. He stopped at the edge of the clearing which had grown over quite a bit in the span of three years. But there was that log they had sat on for hours on end waiting; for proof and the real truth. Now they were back, and it was just another lie brought back. It felt incredibly weird to be back there again, to look back when they were now such different people. Stepping into the clearing felt almost taboo, but Dwicky braved it first, stepping over to the log. The dirt drawing was long gone now, but he could remember it so clearly. Dwicky looked back to Dib. "It's so strange to be back again." Dwicky looked back to the small clearing ahead. _They_ had dropped him off here weeks ago, but it felt like years ago since he'd been here.

Dib snapped out of his trance when Dwicky finally spoke and all he could do was nod his head. He was speechless. The good idea of coming back was suddenly too much for him because of old memories. He followed Dwicky's example and walked over to the log, stopping beside the other only to lean his head against Dwicky's side. When he found his voice again it was quiet. "It's always going to be strange." He moved his bad leg out to kick at the piece of wood as gently as he could. It barely moved an inch, but he wasn't really trying to begin with. "I don't really mind it very much. Being able to talk to you about everything that happened, it doesn't bother me as much anymore."

"To think... just three years ago you were just eleven years old... sitting on that log." Dwicky weakly pointed to where the small boy had sat. "Right there. And I was... there." He hesitantly pointed beside it before letting his hand drop back down. He then slipped the bag off his shoulder and set it on the ground, walking over to the log. He gave it a poke with his toe gingerly, as if it would bite him back. "There were cameras set up on tripods ...and you were drawing in the dirt while I waited for you to tell me what was really wrong, staring at nothing in particular." Dwicky ruffled the hair on the back of his head, still watching the log. "... and it was getting late in the evening."

"And that's when I realized that you didn't believe me. And you told me you were lying, but you just wanted to help me." Dib couldn't tear his eyes away from the log after the words left him. It hurt to think about again, but he tried to push it all away like he had done so many times before. Things were different, none of it mattered anymore. He reached out and grabbed the camera from Dwicky, turning it back on when he had it in his hands. Determined to forget his sudden troubles, he focused it on the other much like he had before. "And you did help me." He smiled behind the camera.

Dwicky gave a startled sound but he didn't expect the camera to be on him again when he'd been so deep in such somber memories. It caused him to make a surprised noise as he staggered back, the log forgotten behind him he tripped backwards over it making a new high pitched surprised sound as he fell back. Legs were the only thing seen draped over the log and he let out a small 'ow'. He raised a hand and he twirled a finger pointedly. "...And I do all my own stunts!"

Dib didn't mean to laugh at Dwicky's misfortune, but it was hard. The camera shook in his hand as he tried to get himself under control, and in the end he had to keep Skeets under an arm and hold the equipment with both hands. As soon as he was calmed down enough, Dib moved forward over the log and straddled Dwicky's waist. Even as he did so, he still kept the camera pinned down on Dwicky while he grinned. "You are quite talented."

Dwicky gave the boy a brief flat look, more so for the fact he was continuing to film. He raised his brows as he gave a lazy sort of smirk. "Getting so comfy so soon?" His hands slid along Dib's legs up to his hips, slipping under the large sweater to the waist of pants. "I didn't think you were the _outdoors_ type." Fingers hooked under the waist of the boy's pants playfully in gesture, tugging it down just a little so fingers could smooth across skin.

Dib was about to respond, but Dwicky's fingers stopped any words he was about to say. Usually he would enjoy the touches, even find them relaxing, but the amount of bruises and such on his skin caused him to flinch from even the slightest brush of fingers. He couldn't help it and hoped that the reaction was hidden behind the camera as he turned it off. He didn't want any tense moments to be on the film, especially if they happened to actually be caught. "I can't help myself. Besides, you're very comfortable." He lowered the camera down and let it rest on the ground so he could finally look at the other.

Dwicky's hands drew away from Dib's sides, it was hard to say whether it was because he saw the hidden flinch or not. His expression softened some, and the man seemed more relaxed since the camera was now off him. "Ya'know," he started out softly "despite the scratches and bruises... you're still lovely to me." The man's expression went a little sad. "And I'm sorry it hurts when I touch you." His eyes fell to Dib's chest. "...I remember saying that when you were out we could be less careful. I was so worried about leaving even the tiniest of bruises or scratches on your skin... That some how just by looking everyone would know. But now... with no one questioning... It's almost worst than the mental institution itself." Dwicky petered off.

Dib had a hard time remembering how to breathe after Dwicky stopped speaking. He hadn't been expecting such words. He blinked his eyes and that's when air finally filled his lungs again and he clutched Skeets to him as tight as he could. He didn't know what to say to any of that. Things were becoming so difficult and he had no clue how to stop any of it. He wanted to so badly, though. The feeling of just wanting to give up and give in caused him to lean forward and lay on top of Dwicky with his head rested under the man's chin.

"I'm sorry if it hurts." Dwicky nearly inaudibly spoke as he lifted his arms to wrap around his little sad Dib. He embraced him tightly, hoping the comfort wouldn't hurt; that thought was just too tragic. "I'm sorry that whatever it is that's happening to you is happening." He held the boy just that much more. "...and I'm sorry for bringing it up again on today of all days." He ran a hand up and down Dib's back, hoping not to jostle any sore spots there. "This isn't supposed to be a place with bad memories anymore." He placed a small kiss atop Dib's head.

Dib shut his eyes tightly at the embrace. It hurt, but he refused to let it show. He wanted the comfort so badly no matter how much it hurt. The past few days had been horrible and now he couldn't even be free of it all in a place where he wanted to forget it. He was so sick of it. So worn down and so tired of it. He wasn't the only one that was being hurt by the whole ordeal and that's what made it worse. "I'm sorry..." The choked up apology was meant for so much, and Dib moved a hand to cling tightly to Dwicky's shirt.

With a grunt Dwicky sat up, keeping Dib tightly held on his lap. He placed a few affectionate kisses on Dib's head, taking the boy's determination to push away that worry for today. "…It's okay. It'll be okay." He rubbed Dib's arms next, as if it was something as simply solved as warming a chill. "We'll be okay." They were such stock words, but Dwicky tried to mean them.

Dib shook his head. For once he was the one to deny the words. It was such a reversal from the past couple of days, but he just couldn't stand it. Everything he heard earlier before Dwicky had picked him up, added on to what the girls had put him through just for the trip out. It was becoming too much. He was so afraid of what would happen next or what he would hear next. "It's not okay." He pulled his head back from Dwicky's chest and stared up at the man with wet eyes. His voice shook, afraid to go on.

Dwicky opened his mouth about to argue against Dib's words but when he looked down at the boy's face, his mouth clicked shut. Instead he encouraged the boy to continue on with small brushes of fingers against what little skin wasn't scratched or bruised on Dib's face. "…Why do you say that, Dib?" he quietly asked.

Dib knew he shouldn't answer. That meant that what he tried so hard to prevent would come true. It only caused him to cling even tighter to Dwicky as he tried to blink away what tears blurred his vision. For so long he stayed silent, trying to calm his quick breaths before he gave in and leaned forward. He buried his face in Dwicky's chest, keeping the other as close as he could. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It's my fault." The words came out muffled against fabric, but Dib was too afraid to speak louder. "I should have listened. You were right. We shouldn't have." He was starting to stutter.

Dwicky slowly shook his head and his brows knitted together tightly. It was hard to make out what Dib was saying with his broken voice muffled against his shirt. "Shouldn't have what, Dib?" He ran his fingers through the boy's hair, smoothing back the ruffled mess, trying to sooth the boy. "What's wrong? What happened?" It was hard for Dwicky to keep his voice still, to keep that anxious feeling down. "Please tell me Dib, what's wrong?" He then tightened his arms around the boy, and he couldn't help rocking the upset boy in his arms.

Even with the touches and small bit of motion, Dib still couldn't calm down enough. There was still that panic there within him that something horribly wrong was going to happen at any moment because he wouldn't keep himself together. "In my room, she saw. They know." The words were finally out and Dib felt his stomach drop. They were going to tell. He had done the worst thing he possibly could, but he just couldn't hold it in anymore. Even afterwards, the words just wouldn't stop spilling. "They were going to tell Dad, tell anyone. I didn't want you to be taken away. I didn't want anything to happen to you." His voice broke up and it took him awhile to continue, brushing tears off on Dwicky's shirt before he was okay again. "But it's going to happen because I couldn't stop. I couldn't keep it in." When he finished he let out a broken noise as he sobbed on Dwicky's chest.

All the comforting motions the man had been making stopped instantly, his arms, his entirety, went rigid, frozen. Dwicky's sight flickered as his mind couldn't seem to wrap around the information Dib had let out. They knew. _They_ knew. Gaz. Tak. The worst of all conscious life on the planet Earth, They had to be the ones to catch them.

Dwicky began to shake his head, unbelieving motions as if denying what was said would make it all untrue. He opened his mouth to question Dib, to ask him if it was true, if he some how, some divine way he had gotten it wrong. But that was a stupid lapse of judgment when the proof was clinging desperately to him. The welts, the broken finger, the scratches, the abuse Dib tried to hide, to take in on himself, the boy had done it all for him, to protect him and keep him safe. And suddenly Dwicky was sick to his stomach with self-loathing and regret. He should have known, should have seen it.

It all made sense now, such perfect horrific sense; Dib's distance, the stress the boy had gone through, even the estranged phone call.

Dwicky couldn't breathe, couldn't swallow, his throat felt so tight and his eyes hurt from growing so wide. And all he could do was remember to hold the sobbing, shaking boy against him, rocking him as his own eyes stung. Dwicky buried his face in the boy's dark hair, hiding his own ragged breath, murmuring comforting words and sounds that even he couldn't make out; he couldn't stop feeling so cold.

Dib clung tighter and even with the comforting words, he still wouldn't let go of the death grip he had. All that he spoke was apology after apology, wishing it could actually make things right. It was a mistake to say anything. A horrible mistake. "I wasn't supposed to tell. I wasn't supposed to say anything." The words came later as he barely pulled enough away to speak them. Even so, they were so broken each one was hard to understand. "That's why I couldn't say anything. I couldn't tell you because then you would get taken away and I never wanted anything like that to happen." He was near hysterics which was causing him to hiccup a bit, but he kept on anyway. "As long as I did what they said then everything would be okay. I could handle it. I wanted to handle it. Even when everything bad came back I still tried to." He looked up and his eyes darted around Dwicky's face. "I'm so sorry."

Dwicky's expression was grave and pale. But some how he managed to cup either side of Dib's face, cupping either side as best he could despite the bandages. "Shhh. Shhhh, Dib. It's not your fault. Listen to me. It's not your fault." He held the boy's gaze and refused to let go of Dib's face, keeping his attention, trying to keep the boy focused on him. "Look at me. Please. Dib. What happened isn't your fault. I knew the consequences when we started this. I knew what I was getting into when this relationship started. We both knew." Dwicky took in a deep shaky breath, his exhale wasn't as successful and hid a small choked sound. "You tried, Dib, I know you did. But you didn't have to do that for me. You didn't." He shook his head. It felt so heavy, he rested it down on Dib's. "That's not right... what they're doing to you isn't right. It's- it's cruel, sadistic a-and sick. How could your dad let all of that happen- how could he not question those marks?" Dwicky choked back his angry tone and shook his head again, more nuzzling it against Dib's. "You should have told me sooner. I could have stopped this, somehow. If I knew what I was putting you through, I- I -should have -damnit." Dwicky's shoulders heavily rose and fell with seething breath; never had he felt so violently hateful to any individual before. "I- I can't believe this."

As much as Dwicky was trying his best to calm him down, the panic just wouldn't go away and Dib couldn't help each choked up sound that came from him. He shook his head as best he could against the other's, denying each thing Dwicky said as he tried to explain himself again between each broken sob. "I couldn't let Dad notice. That's why I tried to cover up. I had to." It was hard for him to calm himself and once more the paranoia was creeping up. Even though Dwicky had a hold of his face his eyes still darted around the woods as if someone were coming to get them at any moment. "If I told you then they would have told. I couldn't do anything. I was okay with how things were. I wanted to make sure you were okay. I didn't want anything to happen. Even..." He stopped and took in a deep shaky breath, afraid to go on, but he pushed anyway. "...even when _They_ came back. I still tried. I couldn't let anything happen."

Dwicky's hold on the boy's face loosened, until his hands fell down to Dib's shoulders. Dib was hearing things again. And that's when Dwicky's arms wrapped tightly around the boy, gathering Dib to his chest, tucking his head under his chin. Through his sorrow he could vaguely recall the day when he'd accidentally clung to Dib, and the boy had grown so calm, after he asked to be held since it made the voices go away. Dwicky cuddled the boy so impossibly close, the worry about hurting him overpowered by the need to keep the boy from falling apart. He shook his head against Dib's, but all he could manage to squeeze from his tight throat was the boy's name, so forlorn and heartbroken, over and over, muffled against Dib's dark hair.

The tight embrace hurt, but it helped at the same time. Dib buried his face in Dwicky's chest, letting out sad little noises against the man's already soaked shirt. He clung to any part he could get to, wanting to make sure Dwicky was still there with him, and the fact he was being held so close just like so many times before calmed him down. "I didn't want to believe them. I didn't want to listen to anything they said, but I had to. They took my pills. They took them and got rid of them. I tried to do it on my own, but everything they said hurt. It was too much. The nightmares were too much. I was scared. I'm sorry." He choked on his voice before another sob escaped him and he almost became limp in Dwicky's arms. "I'm sorry I couldn't handle it. It's my fault. This is all my fault."

Dwicky almost went wooden again, the color drained from his skin and left him shaking. But he didn't let go of his hold on Dib, if anything it tightened, almost painfully. He rocked the boy, rubbing his back to ease those sobs that wracked Dib's chest. "No, no, you did the right thing. You did the right thing with telling me." He swallowed, but it didn't keep the aching sounds from leaving him. "I'm glad-" his voice broke and he had to take a sharp breath before continuing on "I'm glad you told me. You needed to tell me. You shouldn't have to do this alone, and you won't." His hand drew up to stroke the back of Dib's neck, burying fingers in the boy's hair as he pressed a comforting kiss there. "I'm not mad, I'm not mad at you. I was so worried, I just needed to know why. You don't need to lie anymore, you don't have to be scared anymore. I'll fix this. I'll fix it." Dwicky squeezed his eyes shut spilling new tears. "I'll take care of you."

Dib shook his head back and forth as he tried to talk. It was so hard for him to make the words come out when he couldn't control himself long enough. When he finally opened his mouth a broken noise came out before any sentences. "You can't. You can't do anything. Please, because if you do then they can tell. I was supposed to do whatever they said. I wasn't supposed to say anything. They'll know I went against them." He shook his head again as he moved his face away from Dwicky's chest. He kept his gaze down and the one hand that still held tightly to Skeets, rubbed under his eyes. "There's no way to fix it. Please..." He couldn't go on, too choked up to speak anymore.

Dwicky ran fingers through Dib's hair, trying to calm the boy down. "Shhh. Dib, take a deep breath. You have to calm down. It's okay." He cupped the side of Dib's face, brushing the tears away with his fingers best he could. "Shhhh. Just breathe. Just breathe a moment." He gathered Dib better in his arms so he could collect his legs from the log. He put the rest of his energy into forcing himself to stand, carrying the boy with him just a few steps so he could sit himself on the log. There he went back to cuddling the boy impossibly close, rocking back and forth. "I have to, Dib. I'll fix it. Don't worry. I'll make it right again. I won't let them hurt you anymore."

Dib did as he was told, trying his best to take deep breaths until he was no longer coughing and hiccupping. It didn't stop him from burying himself against Dwicky once again as if that would be enough to stop the man from doing anything. "You'll leave me again. I'll be alone again." He shut his eyes tightly causing new tears to fall down his face. "I don't want anything to happen to you. Please don't. I don't want them to know." His voice shook again even though he was trying so hard to stop it. "I'll never see you again."

"I won't leave you." Dwicky answered firmly. "I won't let them push you around and push me away. It's sick, Dib, the abuse they're putting you through. There's something seriously wrong with your sister... and that friend of hers." But Irken weren't a kind race to begin with; but that could never be said to Dib. "I'll talk to them, set them straight." Dwicky strained his voice to keep the anger from it. He wanted to take much harsher action than simple 'talking'. "I'll fix it, I promise." He let out a shaky exhale, drawing strength from a new breath. "No more fear, no more nightmares, no more voices." Dwicky felt himself grow a distance from his body; this was his fault, this relationship, this torture Dib was enduring for his sake. He shouldn't be doing something like this with someone like Dib's age. Dib didn't need i this /i to get better, to be released from the asylum. He could have loved Dib without loving him. Right? Dwicky tightened his hold possessively around Dib. "…You won't be alone."

Dib took another deep breath and even though he was still shaking, he was also calming down. He tried to believe what Dwicky said, but the worry was still there. He knew his sister to be cruel and didn't doubt that she could be true to her word. He had no idea how Dwicky could fix such a thing, but he really did want to believe the man. He wanted everything to be better. His tight hold let up only a little so his hand could drag up towards the back of Dwicky's neck, running his fingers through hair as soon as they were free of his sleeve. He was still afraid, and it was obvious by how much he gave into the hold Dwicky had on him, but he didn't speak anymore. He only moved his head to bury his face near the other's neck, keeping quiet for the moment and giving into Dwicky's words.

Dwicky laid a few kisses against what skin he could of Dib's cheek and neck, not caring if the skin was bruised or scratched. He nuzzled his face against Dib, letting the small thin fingers sooth him as he gave comfort to the other. It felt good to know, despite just how terrible the news was. It left a heavy weight in Dwicky's stomach but at least he knew, the problem was now tangible; and that was half the battle. For now Dwicky just focused on keeping Dib cuddled close, making sure the boy felt safe, secure and loved.

The kisses had a small sigh escaping Dib's lips as each bit of comfort was given to him. It always felt better to be held after so much rough treatment and so much stress. His fingers moved on their own up and down through Dwicky's hair, his mind not really focused too much on what he was doing. He only wanted to stay close, huddled up to Dwicky until the man let go. Until he knew the worst would happen and he would have to face up to everything.

Dwicky didn't know just how long they stayed like that, so desperately huddled together, rocking the boy silently on that log. It wasn't until Dwicky blinked feeling his eyes dried and still aching, realizing the cool wind of the night and dried away the damp streaks down his face that he noticed how late it had gotten. But something in him kept him anchored there refusing to relinquish Dib from his hold. He reached over to the duffle bag he brought and yanked out the blanket from it. He tugged over his shoulders, wrapping it around himself and Dib, keeping them both cozy. He placed a small peck on Dib's cheek before resting his head against the boy. "...and it's a skool night too." he warmly chastised, his voice a little teasing, just trying to lighten their mood.

Dib tensed up at that. He knew Dwicky didn't mean anything, but the man also didn't know the rest of what was going on, other things that Dib had failed to mention. It caused him to pull back just a bit and refuse to meet Dwicky's eyes again as he tried to find words to speak with. His throat felt so scratchy and his mouth, so dry. All the crying had given him a headache, but he tried to ignore it as he gave a small sniffle before finally speaking up. "I haven't been going to Skool."

Dwicky's slight attempt at a smile fell at that. "...W-what?" He stole up Dib's chin with his fingers, raising the boy's head as he tried to meet the boy's eyes. "Why?" Dwicky couldn't smooth the shocked expression from his worried face.

Dib didn't try to look away like all the other times. Instead, he stared straight at Dwicky, even though it was easy to tell he was scared to answer. "I tried to go. I really did." He shook his head, but with the hold Dwicky had on his face it wasn't very much. "It was the day after they got rid of my pills. I couldn't do it. Zim... he was there. He saw me. I got scared." He was starting to panic again and the tears were starting up. "I wanted to ignore him, but he kept bothering me and he chased me. I had to leave after it was all over. I couldn't go back or he would have done worse." He freed himself from Dwicky's hand to bury his face once more. "I couldn't do it."

Dwicky went back to hugging the boy, rubbing his back as his gaze fell to the dirt and grass. Dib's lack of interest in skool now made sense, why he would brush the topic off when he'd been so excited about it. The explanation had him frowning. "…Your dad didn't listen when I told him you should go to a different skool." He let out an exasperated exhale. "This is exactly the reasoning why. I knew only bad things could come from it. You have to transfer skools, Dib. You and I have to talk to your dad about this." He slowly shook his head tiredly. "...What have you been doing if you weren't in skool?"

The sudden subject of transferring had Dib letting out a broken noise. It was an idea that he thought he wouldn't have to deal with, especially when he just stopped worrying about being alone seconds ago. "After I was dropped off I hung out across the street until it was time to go home and made sure no one saw me." The words were quiet and mostly automatic. Dib's mind was too busy thinking about other things.

Dwicky rested his head on Dib's, exhausted both mentally and physically. He shut his eyes and buried his face in Dib's shoulder letting out a tired sigh. So much had happened in just a few days, it was staggering. He pulled the blankets closer around them, keeping them both secure and warm. There was going to be so much to do. So much that might not go over well, but anything was better than this. Dark things mauled themselves over in Dwicky's mind.

Dib stayed silent while he clung tightly to Dwicky much like he had before. He felt like breaking down all over again because of new worries, but they all led up to the same thoughts. He might not have this anymore and that hurt so much. It was so hard to imagine when he had gotten used to having the comfort. Before he knew it a small question was coming from him, muffled and just barely heard. "You still don't regret anything, do you?"

Dwicky gave a small start at hearing the question from yesterday repeated. He gave a long tired exhale, but eventually he spoke up. "…I've caused you so much trouble." He gave a small sniff, rubbing his nose a moment before he put his arm back around. "Had I taken a more professional route with you... or waited, these kinds of complications wouldn't be happening." He wilted some, shoulders slumping; he didn't have very much energy to keep himself up. "Legally this is my fault… I should have known better." Dwicky searched the area around him with his eyes but found no answers there to any of his current problems, only one old sad memory that ruined a boy of eleven. "Maybe if I did so many things differently... things wouldn't have turned out as bad as they have now."

That wasn't the sort of answer Dib hoped for and had him trying to keep in the noise he wanted so much to let out. It hurt to hear such a thing coming from the other. It meant that Dwicky might really regret everything, and after the man told him the day before that he never would, it felt worse than anything the girls could have done to him. He refused to speak, too afraid that he would say something that would really ruin it all, and tried to wipe his tears away as best he could.

Dwicky went silent as well, his gaze frozen on the dark clearing where a ship that wasn't supposed to be a ship once landed. It started and most likely would end here, and it bit and chewed away inside of Dwicky to think that. His hold on Dib became loose, as all the strength seemed to ebb away. He let his eyes sift shut, but there was nothing comforting about the dark behind his eyes. "I'm sorry, Dib." he quietly spoke; for everything and anything, that's all they could say to each other.

The apology and the fact he no longer felt such a possessive grip around him, caused Dib to finally break down once more. He didn't mean to cry again, but it was so hard to keep it all in. His own arm fell from around Dwicky to join his other around Skeets, fearing that it was all he had anymore. He was scared that everything he heard could possibly be true and once more he was choking on tears, starting to stain the plush he held.

Dwicky slid down the front of the log, letting gravity take him down until he thudded on his rear in front of the log. He leaned heavily against it, drawing legs up so he could curl around the broken boy. "Shhh." he murmured against Dib's hair as he pet fingers through it, following down along his neck and back. "Don't cry." Dwicky felt so frayed, unraveled and worn, torn in so many directions; he just wanted things to be okay, for Dib to be alright again. "Don't cry, Dib. Please." He rubbed his cheek against Dib's with tentative affections. "Two days of crying is enough… we don't need three."

Dib moved his head away from the touch. He suddenly didn't want it. Especially when it felt like Dwicky didn't either. "You lied to me." The words came out cracked and Dib kept his eyes averted as he said them. "You said that even if things got worse and worse, you wouldn't regret this." He hugged Skeets tighter, trying his best to draw some kind of strength from the plush, but it just wasn't working. "I thought you cared about me. I thought you loved me." The last few words had him crying again and he buried his face in the plush rather than against Dwicky.

Dwicky's hands fell away, rested on his own legs they tightened into weak fists. He was hurt by the movement and hurt worse by the accusations. "I've never lied to you, Dib. Not once." He shook his head and raised a hand to rub his face and then pinch his nose as if that would cure the emotional knot they'd woven themselves in; it only helped a little with the headache. "Maybe if you didn't too, you'd feel better about you, me, us; maybe we wouldn't even be this miserable at all." He clacked his mouth shut and touched his own lips. His gaze fell and his head lowered heavily. "No... I didn't mean that." A desperate hand rose and clung to the fabric of Dib's shirt. "I love you.,. I love you, I love you, I love you. I just wished you'd believe me when I say it." His free hand rose to cover his face, but there was no hiding the tears when they were in his voice. "..-I wish it was enough."

Dib looked up at Dwicky with wide eyes. All he felt at that moment was fear and his paranoia had taken over so long ago because of it. He didn't want to believe that the voices had been right. Even when Dwicky repeated the words over and over it still didn't help his broken down mind. He was scared to move or even touch Dwicky and to have the man suddenly reject even the slightest touch. He couldn't help himself, though. He needed to cling to the one person that had mattered most to him, whether or not he thought Dwicky wanted it. Skeets dropped between them as he wrapped both arms around the man's neck and buried his face there, trying to stay as calm as he could as he spoke. "I'm happy with you. I'm always happy with you. I just wanted you to feel the same." He shook his head where it lay. "I never wanted to make you worry or make you regret anything you did. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I love you. Please don't leave me alone."

Arms didn't waste time wrapping around Dib so Dwicky could desperately hug the boy to him again. "I don't regret." Dwicky choked out, burying his face in Dib's shoulder. "I don't. I came back for you, it would be stupid if I regretted you. It would be stupid if I left when I just came back, when things are just getting righted again." He hugged the boy just that much tighter. "You'll feel better when we get your medication." He stroked back Dib's hair, smoothing back the frazzled scythe lock of hair. "Once you have a good nights sleep, a good hot meal, you'll feel better. You'll feel more like yourself again. And things will be better." He sniffled wetly, nuzzling his face against Dib's shoulder, half-wiping the new tears away. "You'll be okay."

Dib let out a content sigh at hearing such words. His paranoia slowly left when his fears were pushed away. He pulled away just a bit to look Dwicky in the eye, looking over the man's features for a second. Seeing how worn down the other was upset him because he had been the one to cause such a thing. He moved a hand around to wipe away the tears from the man's face, wanting to help in some way, even with how little the comfort was. "I love you." The words were said again, but less desperate than before as he leaned forward to place a small kiss against Dwicky's lips.

Dwicky sagged, not from hurt or disappointment, but in relief this time. He leaned back heavily against the log, pillowing his head from the rough bark with an arm. He kept Dib near with one arm, letting the boy lay across his front. With one hand he tugged the blanket better across Dib's back. "I love you too. So… so much." He brushed a few fingers against Dib's cheek. "Thank you... for telling me, everything."

Dib tried his best to smile, but he still had a few worries, so it was hard. "I'm still scared." He rested his head down and grabbed Skeets back up to be held. "I don't want them to tell Dad. I was trying to keep you safe, but I wasn't very good at it." His eyes moved around the woods and he let out a heavy sigh. "And I ruined our trip."

"No, you didn't. It needed to be said. I needed to hear those things." Dwicky toyed with Dib's hair for a moment but retired to rubbing the boy's back with tired motions. "Part of being together is sharing problems. This is as much my problem as it is yours." He let out a tired sigh as his gaze went up to the stars that were always so much brighter away from the city. "I have a few choice words for those girls, that I think they'll listen to and back off." Dwicky narrowed his eyes, and despite feeling so exhausted, hot energetic anger shot through him at the thought of the two girls. But it subsided just as quickly. "...See, this trip wasn't a total waste. Look up." He lazily pointed to the stars.

Dib glanced to Dwicky before he followed the man's finger up to the sky. He couldn't help letting out a small noise, in complete awe. There were so many of the small flecks of light in the sky. Being locked up for so long, he really did miss the sight. For a little longer he looked at each tiny star before he freed a hand from Skeets so he could lean over and pick the camera back up that he had set down long ago. The piece of equipment was switched back on as he placed it to his eye and turned it up to the sky. "I still want to keep some memories from this night." His focus with the camera was dropped back down on Dwicky's face and he smiled behind it as he moved a hand out even as he filmed to brush back the piece of hair on the man's forehead. "We can still make good ones because I'm still happy just being here with you."

Dwicky closed one eye and stuck out his tongue. "I look my worst and you want to film me." He gave a small laugh. "Of course." He pulled the boy against him, tugging the camera away so he could hold it facing them, filming them both. "At least you can look horrible with me." He planted a quick kiss on Dib's cheek, smiling some after for the boy.

The kiss and one smile he finally got from Dwicky had Dib's own smile widening. He leaned forward until their noses were touching and couldn't stop the tiny laugh that escaped him. It felt good after all of the crying he had done. "I don't mind." He pressed his lips to the other's once more, the kiss longer than the last before he pulled away. "I love you, Dwicky." The small words were caught on film. A better memory than the old one from so long ago.


	33. Sessions 33

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 33

The white car had long stopped in front of the Membrane house, parked in front of the driveway rather than in it. The two had been long leaning against the side opposite the house, leaving little barrage and cover from any peering eyes of the occupants inside. But it didn't seem to matter so much anymore, 'being careful'.

Dwicky had taken to staring up at the sky, vacillating between mixed emotions and equally mixed thoughts and actions. He tried to recall the name of each star, he used to know each and everyone so long ago, but now their names were just as blurry and unclear as his own thoughts. Many times he tried to open his mouth and say something, a segue for them to finally move and go in, a passing comment anything. But every time Dwicky just shut his mouth again. There was a small part of him that still desperately clung to hold onto each 'normal' moment with Dib. Standing there with Dib, out in the open, enjoying each others company, Dwicky loved those small moments. So he kept quiet and continued to just watch the stars, glancing at the moon.

Dib didn't mind the silence and was in no rush to go inside to face his fears. Skeets was held close to his chest with one hand while the camera was held limp at his side in the other. The tape was hidden safe away in Dwicky's car only to be seen by who it was meant for and kept with the man so other prying eyes couldn't get to it. His own eyes stared up just as the other's were, but he didn't seem as interested in what was in the sky as he had before. It was hard to enjoy such things as stars when he had so much to worry about. Slowly, his eyes drifted over to Dwicky, just to make sure the other really was still there with him. It was silly to think he wouldn't be, but Dib couldn't help it.

Feeling eyes on himself, Dwicky glanced over to Dib meeting the boy's gaze, soon with a small smile. He uncrossed his arms and dug his hands in his pockets; he felt aloof, far from relaxed, but comfortable despite, in Dib's presence.

Dib gave a small smile of his own, even with his worries. It helped to see such a thing on Dwicky's face and he couldn't help but calm down a little bit and looked back up. With the sudden calm he finally found his voice, but it was quiet, afraid everything would suddenly fall apart because of it. "Everything will be okay, right? We'll be okay?"

Dwicky nodded and looked back up as well. "Yea. We'll be alright." He quietly answered back. He gave a soft sigh as he closed his eyes. Sightlessly, his hand slipped out of his pocket and reached over Dib's way, hoping to be taken; it was dark, no one would see, it would be okay to touch.

Dib didn't have to look down to know what the movement meant at his side. It only took a bit of shifting around before he was moving a hand out to take Dwicky's own while still looking up at the sky, his fingers tightening around the man's. He didn't ever want to let go and if he had it his way, he never would. Things never seemed to be that easy, though.

The man opened his eyes again, looking up at the stars once more, feeling a piece more complete when he felt Dib's hand in his, squeezing his hand; and in turn squeezing the boy's back. For a moment Dwicky's worries subsided to idle wonderings if they could ever be like this under the light of day, hand in hand without worry, or constant caution of prying eyes. Dwicky tried to picture it, four years in the future, in a place where they wouldn't be known, acting like an actual couple out in the open. It had him resting his head back on the car with a heavy sigh. Four years was a long time, and there would be plenty other 'Taks and Gazs' in that span of time. Dwicky opened his mouth again to speak once more, but once again out of the many other times, he shut it; he gave into the quiet, the moment.

To have even a small bit of contact between them helped Dib believe that everything could be alright. They would get through everything and he wished he had believed it from the start instead of waiting to tell Dwicky what had happened. Even though telling had meant the worst he truly hoped it could instead help things get better. The thought had his thumb stroking the back of Dwicky's hand, trying to draw the small little heart that only meant something between them.

It had Dwicky looking at Dib again, the drawing having drawn him from his thoughts. His expression softened, though he spoke not a word.

Dib turned his eyes away from the sky and back to Dwicky. He gave a small smile, trying his best to be as optimistic as he could, but in the end his hand tightened around Dwicky's own a bit more. Instead of looking back up his eyes fell to his sneakers.

"It's been a beautiful night." Dwicky finally spoke up, albeit almost inaudibly. His gaze fell to Dib's sneakers as well, and he recalled that big shopping trip they'd made to buy those, and most everything Dib wore. He suddenly bore the urge to blurt out the question for Dib to come home with him, to stay the night. But that idea would only hurt them more than help. Dib would instantly agree and the declination after he'd talked to the girls would only hurt the boy all the more. Instead he just tightened his hold on Dib's hand, brushing his fingers against Dib's knuckles.

The words surprised Dib. After having nothing but silence from Dwicky for so long, he hadn't expected the man to actually speak up on his own. It caused him to look at the other and stay quiet for a bit before he tried his best to smile again. "You're right." He looked back up and couldn't help but stare at the stars once more. Feeling comforted by the fingers brushing across his skin as he spoke up again. "I hope it's like this again if we decide to go back there. I wouldn't mind it."

"Though... rain isn't all bad." Dwicky couldn't help his slight grin at that memory. He gave a nonchalant shrug that wasn't all that nonchalant. "I've learned not to mind it all that much." He glanced back at Dib, grinning just a little more. "Especially with current company present." Dwicky chuckled very quietly. "We should go up on the roof again too."

Dib nodded eagerly at that and tried his best not to bounce a bit on his one good leg, but it was hard. He suddenly felt much better since it seemed Dwicky was as well. His attention turned back on the man and he smiled once more before he spoke up. "See, it's not so bad. We have our places to run to when we want to get away." He moved a bit leaning against Dwicky's side, feeling it was more than safe enough, at least for just a second. "It helps."

Dwicky in turn rested his head atop Dib's, the boy was so short, it required a bit of a lean down. "Mini vacations." He gave a small aggregative nod. With his free hand he dug around in his pocket. He pulled a long, flat square box, turning it over in the dull light of street lamps and stars, he looked it over. "We should go in now." he finally announced in the quietest of voices. It was an inevitable that Dwicky was trying to avoid the situation, but it felt time. Any longer and someone would wonder. "You need your sleep. Big day, -big couple of days." He showed the small package of 'Lights Out' sleeping pills he'd bought on the way home. "I want you to go upstairs and straight to bed after taking these... while I talk to the girls in private." He gave the package a small but firm shake. "Promise me."

Dib freed his hand from Dwicky's so he would be able to take the pills from the other. The small order caused him to pout, considering he had been hoping to stay with Dwicky during everything. Just to make sure everything really did turn out okay. Instead of fighting against it, Dib only nodded his head. Sleep sounded much too appealing a thing to really argue against. "I promise." He turned his head, disturbing Dwicky as he did, but feeling the need to look at the other as he spoke. "I love you." He felt the words had to be said at that moment, the fear coming back at the notion of going inside.

Dwicky's expression softened with a smile at the endearing sentiment. Dib's words sounded so desperate, as if the boy would never be able to say it or hear it back ever again; it panged Dwicky, and he hoped it would never be the last time he'd hear and return those three words. But actions spoke louder than words, right? "I love you too, Dib. Even when I'm not saying it, please know that I mean it... with everything I do." He touched the boy's cheek, leaning more so to place a sweet kiss on the boy's forehead. "Even if what we do hurts, it's because we love each other. I know that now. Our situation... doesn't make any of this easy." He brushed his finger against Dib's cheek a moment before he let his hand drop back down. "I'll come in and see you to bed. Heh, tuck you in. Just to make sure... you actually sleep this time." Other reasons masked by sincerity, but for the most he wanted the boy to have a decent sleep for once after leaving the asylum.

The small kiss and little touches eased Dib and had the smile returning to his face. He was glad to get one last moment with Dwicky. That alone helped even more. "I know you love me. I'm sorry if I ever doubt that you do." His eyes fell for a moment as hurtful words came back to him. "It's just been hard for me lately, but I really did try." He looked back up and tried his best to smile again. "You mean a lot to me and I know you feel the same about me. Everything will be okay and then we can be a family without so many things trying to go wrong."

Dwicky gave a nod and pushed off the car, dusting his back off. "Then let's go in and face our destinies." He placed a hand on Dib's shoulder leading the boy from the car. "Though I think you have a much easier destiny than I." He grinned some. "I'd take sleeping in a nice comfy, warm bed over having a long serious talk with two juvenile delinquents any day. Especially with the present company included." He chuckled quietly as they walked to the door.

With each step to the door Dib started to feel that tiny bit of panic once more. As hard as he tried to push it to the side it just wanted to stay there with him, especially when he let them both inside the house and could see everything so clear. The television could be heard, but there was silence. Dib knew that only meant that the girls were listening for him. The door did creak whenever it opened, so it was easy to tell whenever someone came through. He knew his best bet would just be to get a drink and head upstairs to get ready for bed, but hoped it would actually be that easy.

Dwicky didn't wait for Dib, he walked straight into the living room, straight into the lion's den and dead into its mouth. He stood there in plain sight before either girl, taking in both surprised and hateful glares of 'how dare you be alive right here in front of us'. He pointed from one to the other, which only got him more looks of more loathing. But Dwicky met their gaze blow for blow, his tired features grew hard and for a moment he didn't look or sound like the same kind man he had been last he walked into the house. "I will be talking to you two in a minute." His pointed finger lingered on Tak, and that's when the girl's expression grew just that much more hateful, cognitively no doubt she was ripping him apart most violently in her mind. "Outside." That said, Dwicky walked back over to Dib, out of sight of the girls his expression grew sallow and grave. But when he reached Dib the expression lifted and Dwicky hoped that Dib couldn't hear just how hard his heart was thundering in his chest. He placed a shaky hand on Dib's shoulder and quietly urged him. "C'mon, let's go upstairs."

While Dwicky was away, Dib had swallowed down the pills with a glass of water which he still held when the man came back. He stared at the other with wide eyes, but calmed down at the touch and only nodded his hand as he started to walk. It didn't take long for them to reach his room. The door to the room wasn't even closed, but that was probably the girls' doing while he had been away. Only when they were both inside did he close it behind. The area was still a mess considering Dib hadn't had the chance to clean up since the last time Dwicky had been over. Only a few things were kicked around to make room.

Dib went straight to his closet after setting Skeets and glass of water aside, focused on putting the camera away and getting into his pajamas, so he could get settled. Although, it was obvious by the way his hand shook as he tried to get it to open: he was still nervous.

Dwicky was shocked yet somehow unsurprised to see the room in the same state as he'd left it. He took his time looking everything over while Dib got changed, rubbing his own hands together to keep himself from fidgeting. "So... kiddo, where'd you put my tie?" he spoke in a hushed whisper, as if speaking itself was taboo. He picked up Skeets and tried to straighten one of the antenna, but the plush was well loved and the antenna fell over anyway. He smoothed a hand over the black spots feeling the worn fuzz that had been clutched, clung, hugged and cried upon more than any plush he'd ever known. Dwicky gave a small sigh as he hugged the plush to his own chest. "You're a good man, Skeets." He murmured quietly to the plush, playing with one of the antenna like Dib always did.

Dib squirmed around as he tugged the top to familiar pjs down over his head. After a few tries he was successful and fully clothed in the tiny ladybug print that had been bought what felt like ages ago. He moved his injured hand up to run it through his roughed up hair as he looked back at Dwicky, thinking over the question, before it dawned on him. "Oh, yeah." He turned around and rummaged through his closet, pulling the tie out. Immediately after he closed it up, a small click heard afterwards. "I had to hide it away so Gaz couldn't find it while I was out." He walked up to Dwicky and stopped in front of the man, holding the tie out. It was easy to tell he was a bit upset with his next words. "Did you want it back?"

Dwicky shook his head and gave a small weak smile. He took the tie and tugged it loose so he could fit it around Skeets' chubby neck. He tightened it so it would fit just right and then presented Skeets back to Dib. "There, the two are now made one. You should sleep especially good tonight." He smiled more though his eyes sifted lower shut; laying down and cuddled warmly to such a snuggly-looking Dib, it sounded so very tempting at that moment. But Dwicky plucked Dib's glasses from his face. "So crawl into bed, those night time pills should be kicking in soon." He folded each arm of Dib's glasses closed.

Dib gladly took Skeets back and clutched the plush tight. He gave a small smile to Dwicky before he did as told and got into bed, pulling down the covers and slipping under. It was true that the pills were starting to slowly work. He felt drowsy, but he still had some energy in him. He had a feeling it was because of his worry over what was going to happen that he wanted to stay as awake as he possibly could.

Dwicky carefully set the boy's glasses on his night table. He then tugged the covers up, tucking Dib comfortably in. "Get cozy and warm. Cuddle up with Skeets." He sat down on the bed beside the boy, folding his hands in his lap for the moment; at least now the door was properly closed, not that it mattered all that much. "Sleep as much as you can, call in sick at skool tomorrow if you still want more sleep." He gave the boy a quick sly grin. "I'll pick you up a new set of pills for you tomorrow. And then I'll talk to your dad about skool." He let out a tired sigh, knowing just how difficult that confrontation would be. "But for now... all you need to think about is things that make you happy and safe, and having a good long sleep." He raised a hand to brush away a few dark strands from Dib's forehead.

Dib closed his eyes with the touch and brought Skeets even closer if at all possible. One certain thing Dwicky said caused a frown to come to his face and he curled up as best he could under the blanket. One of his hands moved out to grab the one near his face and clung to it. He refused to voice his worries, knowing that's not what he was supposed to do. Instead, he just kept hold of Dwicky for the moment, wanting to keep hold of the other until he finally drifted off.

Dwicky turned his hand in Dib's so he could return the hold. "Skeets will make sure you have sweet dreams." He ran his thumb softly against the boy's hand, giving a small chuckle. "He'll chase away all the bad ones... he's a brave ladybug like that." The man gave a softer sigh, letting his eyes wander around the room, recalling their little break time fun on the floor that had gotten them into this mess. This little romance they had going on was dangerous for both of them; and it hurt Dwicky to actually think- was it hurting more than it was helping? "Good night, sleep tight… don't let the bed bugs bite." Dwicky leaned forward and placed a small kiss on the boy's lips. "I love you."

"Love you..." The words had come out as a dull whisper from Dib's lips. His hand was slowly going limp in Dwicky's own and soon his breathing evened out as he fell into a deep sleep for the first time in days.

Dwicky watched Dib, still holding his hand long after he heard the boy's soft easy breath. It felt so good to see Dib so at ease, so peaceful, asleep, even if it was drug induced. He tugged the blankets just that much higher on the boy, smoothing them down, and the boy's hair as well. "Let him sleep tonight... please." He finally stood up, smoothing the blankets down again but never letting go of the boy's hand, not just yet. "...Take good care of him Skeets." Dwicky finally tugged his hand free of Dib's, tucking the hand back under the blankets near the plush. He stood there a moment, just watching Dib sleep. He back stepped, running a hand through his own ragged hair. "Night... kiddo." Dwicky finally turned leaving the boy's room, shutting the door quietly behind him. There he stood at the top of the stairs, the tension was already so thick it could be cut with a knife and served on a plate.

Dwicky descended the stairs, taking each one carefully as he firmly gripped the banister. He didn't stop moving until he was by the girls again, by then his mood had sobered up and he laid a hard somber gaze on the two. "Outside. Now."

As soon as Dwicky was in their line of vision once more, Gaz was the first to narrow her eyes on the man. She had to be the one to keep a cool head considering the man's earlier words seemed to have riled Tak up more so than usual. That didn't mean she was no more upset than the other girl. Being ordered around once more did nothing to calm that anger and before Tak could do anything about it, Gaz was up off of the couch without a word, leading the other with her calmly by the hand and out the front door.

Dwicky followed, he could feel his pulse racing as he stepped closer to the thresh hold. He took one long deep breath before he stepped outside to the cool night, closing the door behind them. There was no turning back. Not now, not ever again.

Dwicky turned to face the girls in the dull pool of the porch light. His cool expression was chiseled by anger that he'd been keeping in ever since the news in the woods. Now that Dib was deep asleep, their father was deep in his lab and they were alone outside, Dwicky could finally let everything he'd been keeping restrained out.

"I'm going to cut the crap and get straight to the point" He bore his own hard gaze at the girls. "I know what you've been doing to Dib. I know about your sick little tortures you put him through at my expense. I know you couldn't care less about his well being, as his sister or as family. I know about the black mail, I know that you know. But you know what?" He sneered and pointed at Tak. "I know your secret as well. I know who you are and where you're from. I know why you're here, and why Zim's here." Dwicky let out a most sarcastic laugh. "Age is one thing, but age _and_ interspecies-- that's a whole new bucket of Targonoops." He looked from one to the other but didn't give them a chance to speak up, not just yet, he wasn't done. "I don't give a damn what your sob story is, or why there are _two_ Irken trying to conquer this planet. But you two and Zim better stay the hell away from Dib or the _entire_ human race is going to find out damn fast that there really is alien life. And your father is going to be the first man to dissect the very alien that has been sleeping with his daughter." Dwicky narrowed his eyes with a malicious humour he didn't realize he even had inside him. And he crossed his arms leaning back aloof, but his mean wide grin never left him. "Don't you rather like that irony?"

Gaz had been expecting anything. Another lecture and maybe even more senseless poking and prodding about Dib that she would refuse to answer. But what was presented to them and in such a harsh tone, that was one thing she didn't expect. It actually caught her by surprise for a moment before she quickly calmed herself down once more. The entire time she kept her eyes on Dwicky, trying to see if anything about the man's expression showed that he was bluffing, but it was too much fact from fiction. It caused her to tighten her hold on Tak's hand for all of a second before she actually spoke up, trying to keep that calm in her voice. "You don't have any _real_ proof." That one thought actually caused Gaz to settle down as she thought over it in her head a bit. "Why would Dad believe you about anything so i insane /i when he wouldn't even believe, Dib?" She grinned.

"I already have a video tape recording of Zim. And the beautiful about Irkens is- you all look alike. There would be no questions asked which one is which. There will always be cameras for those small opportunities you two let your guard down- to do who knows what." Dwicky made a low disgusted sound in his throat. "Not to mention you're working with old, third-rate Irken technology." Dwicky, much too boldly, walked over to Tak and grasped some hair that when yanked, the human imagery of the lilac haired girl blipped to the green skinned Irken underneath and it was a curled antenna Dwicky tugged.

The action gained Dwicky a sharp seething hiss from the Irken and Tak swiped at the man's hand with a growl. Dwicky jerked back, knicked, but for the most he seemed much too pleased with himself to have the female Irken so riled up. Had it not been for the tight hold on Tak's hand, the Irken would have leapt and done Dwicky in rather violently.

"Not to mention I have friends in high places." Dwicky continued on, rubbing his scratched hand. He pointed up to the starry sky. "Familiar with the Plookesians? Well, they keep to themselves but they're rather familiar with you and your Tallest." The man gave a rather easy shrug. "And wouldn't your Tallest be rather interested to hear what you and your little human 'girlfriend' have been up to these last few years. Bumbling hijinx with Zim? I hear that Irken has quite a history down on Irk. Or so rumor floats around in space."

Tak's antenna lowered, shuddering, shivering, her complexion paled. Her scowl slowly left her and she slowly looked to Gaz.

Gaz felt Tak's eyes on her, but she still didn't look at the other. Instead she slipped her hand out of Tak's own and ran it up the other's arm to try and keep her calm, before letting her hand fall back down as she stepped forward. She felt that if she didn't block Tak from Dwicky the Irken would do some damage if provoked enough, and she was already teetering on that edge. They really didn't need that at the moment. "So the truth of the matter is you know everything that's going on? If that's the case then why didn't you just stay in the asylum with, Dib? You two could have been perfectly happy there together where you both belong. Maybe you could have even shared a room."

Dwicky leaned down, just enough to be eye level with Gaz, meeting her narrowed gaze with the same distaste head on. But he couldn't help it as the corner of his lips perked upward, knowing that would grate her most of all. "Don't push your luck, little girl." he spoke firmly.

Gaz had to resist the urge to raise her hand and land it across Dwicky's cheek; that would just make things worse. Instead, she settled for narrowing her eyes, wishing she really could bore a hole straight through the man's head. Her hands tightened at her sides for a few seconds, but it really did nothing for her temper. "You can't protect him all the time. At some point you'll be gone. Then what?"

"There is no 'then what'." Dwicky straightened, taking back his height and in turn taking back the power of the situation; an Irken trait, and it rattled Tak who stood loaded like a spring trap behind Gaz. But Dwicky seemed to pay either any mind, which rubbed either of them the wrong way; good. "If I hear one ill thing from Dib, one complaint about either of you _and_ Zim, I won't think twice about letting what I know out. I tried playing nice, but-" Dwicky gave a nonchalant shrug "you two blew it. So, now I think you'll listen to me when I say 'you mind your business while we mind ours'." Dwicky smiled wide and almost dementedly as he clasped his own hands together in a final devious fashion.

Gaz stayed silent for a few moments before the tense feeling in her muscles went away and a small grin came to her own lips. It was a strange thing for the situation, but she couldn't help it. "So, what you're actually saying is you want us to let you two have at it whenever you want? Isn't that the hidden message in there?" She glanced back at Tak just to make sure the other girl still wasn't in danger of attacking Dwicky. When she was satisfied, she turned her attention back to the man and tried to look as innocent as she could, considering all of the accusations brought upon them. "That's such a horrible thing to ask of us. What you're doing is just as wrong, you know. In every sense of the word." The innocence faded and the grin came back.

The man was unmoved by Gaz's words and he clicked his tongue after she was done speaking. He crossed his arms and pointed Tak's way. "And you are- how old, Irken? A hundred and what?"

"You mind your own age, _human_!" Tak snapped back at him.

"Right. And you're- what?" Dwicky pointed at Gaz. "Thirteen? Just entering puberty?" He tapped his lips in mock thought before giving a sly smirk. "I think you're preaching a much worse hypocrisy, little girl." His smile grew long and wiry. "Not smart. Not smart at all. So cut the crap, swallow your pride and accept your losses. Continue to play whatever little Irken invader game you two, three, are playing- but leave Dib out of it. We don't bother you, you don't bother us. I'm sure those terms aren't that difficult to accept."

Once again Gaz stayed silent, but kept her heated gaze on the man. She didn't like any of what was happening, but she had played enough games in her life to know when she was beaten. And for now they were very well beaten and there was no way around it. All they could do was agree, but she wasn't going to let it go just like that. "We just wanted to help him remember some things, things that everyone has been trying to make him forget." Despite having lost the real battle, she still gave a small smirk. "Things that even you know are real." She looked away back towards Tak, but her words were still directed at Dwicky. "He used to talk about you before he went to the asylum. I guess it would really kill him to know that you actually knew so much."

Tak's rigid edge was shed and she stepped back to Gaz's side, fitting against the girl like a perfect piece of a deadly puzzle. Her slender arms slipped around Gaz's waist, despite the threats to expose who she was and what they were doing, it didn't hinder her possessive affections for the human girl. "It would break his itty bitty little human heart."

Dwicky didn't bite on the words that were meant to rattle him. He simply let it slide off his shoulders with a simple shake of head. "Then it's a deal?" he continued on with what he'd been saying.

As soon as Tak was beside her once again, Gaz let her gaze drift back to Dwicky. One of her hands moved up to rest on Tak's arms as she started to speak up. "There's no real way around it, is there? We might as well do it your way." She shrugged her shoulders for a quick second. The anger melted away when Tak had come near. "It doesn't mean we have to like it, but I know I'm not going to jeopardize a certain identity because of my stupid brother." Her eyes narrowed once more. "But you better make sure he keeps to himself."

Dwicky knitted his fingers in front of himself sealing the deal with that very action. A long, lithe grin spread across his features, satisfied; he'd won. "I'm glad we could come to an understanding, girls."

Tak watched the man from the corners of her eyes, instantly pushing away his existence after all was said and done. It was her way of taking her losses gracefully. Though it was evident there was plenty heavily weighing on her mood now.

"Be sure to speak to Zim about this as well. Keep your own in line." Dwicky's gaze kept on Gaz though he spoke mainly to Tak.

Tak's claws only gripped the other girl's clothing just that much tighter, but she gave no acknowledgement otherwise.

Gaz spoke for Tak, finding the situation to be much safer that way. "We'll talk to him when we see him. There's not really very much he can do. If you've heard rumors, as you've claimed to hear, then you should know just how stupid he is." She tried to sidestep the little incident that happened at Skool, having heard about it from Zim himself after they bugged the Irken about where Dib was when classes were over.

Dwicky narrowed his eyes, the same incident flitting across his mind, but he wasn't going to push the tension of the situation any further than it would allow. "So I've heard." he commented off-handedly, the sarcasm in his tone was biting. He glanced at his watch and a new wry smirk crossed his features. "Well it's getting late, girls, and it's a skool night after all." He tapped the face of his watch, his smirk growing just that much more. "So I shouldn't keep you two up any longer than I have."

Tak's antenna twitched in agitation. "…I abhor you." she muttered low under her breath to Dwicky.

Gaz raised her other hand up to touch one of the twitching antenna, trying her best to sooth Tak's anger. The fact that they would finally be rid of the man for the night put her mind at ease, just a bit. She couldn't help still having some sarcastic remarks for Dwicky, even if he was leaving. "Going to leave without saying goodbye to your boyfriend? Not even a goodnight kiss?" She grinned. "We could tape it this time if you want."

Dwicky pointed at Tak. "Does she _ever_ go home? Do you even _have_ a home?" He jerked his hand back before the Irken could bite it off. "...Guess not. Well, good night, girls." He stepped off the porch heading back to his car. "Sweet dreams." He gave them one last eerie smile and a wave.

"...Bludgeoning him with a rusty blade in the face sounds like the start of a good dream." Tak muttered low enough so only Gaz could hear.

"It does." Gaz watched as Dwicky got into his car, keeping a careful watch on him the entire time. "But, we have to watch our step now. I should have figured something was up that day when he saw you. I shouldn't have shrugged it off as quick as I did." She shook her head and glanced sideways at Tak. "We've been hanging around too many stupid people lately. We're not used to those smart ones."

Tak scoffed as she rested her chin on Gaz's shoulder, watching the car start up and drive off. "Spare him the compliments. He would have never found out if your crazy brother had kept his mouth shut like he should have. He lucked out." She sighed in annoyance. "I blame Zim. This is his fault. I was having such a good time- then _he_ had to mess up our fun." She growled low in her throat. "Forget 'talking' to him, I'm going to crush his skull the next time I see him." Once Dwicky was out of sight Tak slammed her fist into her palm. "And how dare he bring up my Tallest!" she seethed.

Despite Tak's anger Gaz still kept calm. Her eyes had moved back to where the car once was and she allowed Tak to let out her anger finally. The Irken needed it, it seemed like. "Well, at least we can take all of this out on someone. It's just too bad it's not who we originally planned." Her mind went over the last few things Tak said and the earlier conversation. "It does seem like he knows an awful lot doesn't it?" Her eyes finally narrowed and she let out an aggravated sigh. "That was a lot of information for it to have been any kind of bluff. Something I was hoping it was."

Tak shrugged but her curly antenna wilted. She didn't know who this 'Dwicky' person was past the last few weeks. She was on Earth and gone before Dwicky came around. Returning a second time Dib had already gone into the asylum, much to her disappointment. Though she had quickly found a new interest altogether to keep her preoccupied on Earth. In the end she never had the misfortune of meeting the aggravating skool counselor; until now. But Tak didn't have to know Dwicky to see he was absolutely bad news for her and her plans. The whole new situation had her antenna out of joint. Tak shook her head. Everything Dwicky said bothered her. "It has been fun... but," she drew her arms away from Gaz's middle and stepped away towards the door "several years is too long to be taking over a planet." she mauled over allowed, opening the door. She was as far from her Tallest's graces as she could get, minus Zim.

The words and the fact that she was no longer being held caused Gaz to turn to where she heard Tak's voice. She stood there for a bit before her mind clicked and told her to follow after the other. She was just in time to catch up with Tak and grab the Irken by the arm, not very rough, but still just enough to grab her attention. Her other hand kept the door open, not caring what sort of bugs made their way inside as she spoke up to the other. "What do you mean by that?" There was nothing in her voice, just a simple question.

Tak stopped, her antenna perking Gaz's way before her coloured eyes fell on the girl. Her antenna lowered back down. "A game can only be amusing so long before it becomes procrastination." She looked down to Gaz's hand before she looked at the girl's face again. "After what that moronic flesh bag said.. I've come to realize I've been putting things off for too long." The Irken glanced to her other clawed hand, idly watching her fingers toy about. "As fun as it is to watch Zim suffer what he should... its made time fly by much too fast."

Gaz didn't mean to let out the breath she had been holding, but it was hard not to. The best she did was cover it up with words, rubbing her hand up and down Tak's arm as she spoke. "You're letting him get to you. Don't listen to what that guy says. Besides, Zim got in the way before. Even if you stop playing around with him, what makes you think he won't get in the way again?" She moved forward, letting the door fall to her back so she could raise her other hand to one of the curled antenna and twist it between her fingers. "Zim isn't getting anything done because you've been making sure of it. That's the best thing. I know you're getting aggravated, but don't get so much so that you listen to people like _that_ guy." She scowled.

Antenna had tensed at the touch but Tak allowed it and all the other touches that came. "Zim screws up even his own plans for planetary conquest. He doesn't need help with that. He's just been very, very, very lucky." She considered briefly for a moment. "And unlucky." The Irken placed her hand atop Gaz's that moved on her arm. "It's very easy to stop Zim. A Pak leg through his face and a laser in his belly, and the most in the way he'll be is a door stop." Tak laughed meanly at that mental image. "Zim may be 'lucky' but he's not invincible." She seemed to relax more at her own promise of death and carnage, letting Gaz do more if she liked.

Tak had a point, but Gaz wasn't going to let such a thing stop her from pushing on. She kept her eyes on the Irken for a few more minutes before she dared to speak again, linking their hands together as she did. "There's nothing wrong with just sitting back and enjoying another's torture. It's fun, right? At least, it seems like you've been having a little fun." She leaned forward and placed her chin on Tak's shoulder, keeping it there as she continued to speak. "I know you're anxious, but now we have other problems as well. It's best to lay a little low, hmm?" She hoped the excuse worked.

Tak paused in her nods of agreement. "Low?" she echoed. "Lay low from what? From who? And how long? From your brother's little illegal escapade? He's no threat. Neither of them are a threat. What good could either of them do? I doubt whining and romps in the sack will save the world from domination." She raised a hand to toy with one of Gaz's violet pigtails. "No one has the brains, or the ability to stand up against me, against us." She twirled the girl's hair around one claw before gently dragging her finger from it, letting it unwind before twirling it again. "It would certainly show that ignorant moron not to cross us."

Gaz wasn't scowling, but inside she was angry enough that Tak hadn't agreed. She didn't have much else to go on. It was all Dwicky's fault. If he hadn't of opened his big mouth then she wouldn't have to be worrying about more than just the situation with her brother at the moment. She needed to calm herself down, though, and think rationally. Anger wasn't going to get her anywhere. She moved a bit so she was in front of Tak, allowing the door to finally shut. She didn't give it even the smallest glance, too occupied with pressing her lips to Tak's own and keeping them there for a few long seconds. Only when she pulled away did she speak, still making a bit of contact. "I just think it would be a good idea to be careful. He said he knows people. Maybe if we're careful for a little while he'll back off."

Tak made a low sound in her throat, the kiss motivating her to grasp the front of Gaz's shirt to tug the girl forward to the couch as she backed up towards it. She gave Gaz a slightly surprised look. "You aren't calling his bluff?" Tak sat on the arm of the couch, her antenna quirking at the question.

Gaz had followed along and stood in between Tak's legs as the Irken sat down. "I want to, but at the same time I don't know if we should chance it." Her hands dropped down and slipped under Tak's shirt to run up the green skin underneath. "I remember that guy not just as some Skool counselor. Before Dib went to the asylum that guy was here at our house. I thought it was one of those stupid teacher kind of visits, so I didn't care about it." Her hands stopped for a moment and dropped as she narrowed her eyes in thought as she tried to remember. "Dib came home later that night really upset and went straight to his room. So, what if that guy isn't lying about seeing what he's seen?" She allowed her hands to move once more while leaning forward to press a kiss against Tak's shoulder. She only paused for a moment to continue. "What if he really does know all he says he does and has proof to back it up just from being in space?"

"Then let them have their stupid romance." Tak muttered in aggravation between pleased murmurs. "They can rough and tumble all they want as the world falls to pieces- I don't care. It'll be too late then. He won't be able to do anything." She wrapped her lithe legs around Gaz's waist, drawing the other girl nearer and keeping her close. "It won't matter who he is or where he went- he'll go _squish_ like all the rest of his inferior race." She ran her tongue affectionately along the curve of Gaz's neck. "Minus you, of course." she added with a soft smirk.

Gaz gave a soft sound at the lick, but didn't give up so easily at the attention. She was still determined. "You heard him, though. If Dib tells him anything at all then your identity is in danger." She shook her head a little after those words. "I care nothing for what happens to Zim, but I just don't want anyone to get their hands on you." It was the truth, but at the same time there was more reasoning behind it. She moved her head back up and placed another kiss on the side of Tak's lips before she went on. "Think about it a bit. Please."

Tak was more taken aback by the last word Gaz said. Of all words to be expected to leave Gaz's mouth 'please' was as far from the vocabulary Tak expected to be hearing. It had her argument stopping and her coloured eyes widening some. She did give it some thought then, but in the end it had her sighing. The Irken relaxed her hold on Gaz and let herself fall from the arm of the couch onto the cushion seats, landing with a slight bounce. "Fine. I'll give it more thought." Tak sighed again, letting her hand drape over her eyes. "But I won't take what that idiot said lying down."

Gaz was more than relieved that she had won. "That's good enough for me." Since the worst was over a small smirk spread on her lips because of Tak's last few words. "Although, I think you're doing a good amount of lying down right now." She shrugged her shoulders and moved over the arm of the couch. In one small movement she slid down to sit between Tak's legs and on top of the other girl. "Not that I mind very much." She raised her head while Tak had her guard down and took one curled antenna between her teeth.

Tak let out a girlish whimper. "You wouldn't." She closed one eye, arching into the couch. Her claws slipped under Gaz's shirt to draw across the warm pale skin underneath, tugging it up so she could nuzzle the girl's chest; the action didn't stay innocent for long. She knew she was easily taken by the distraction, giving in much too easily, but this relation was like an addiction; in all honesty she didn't want it to end either.


	34. Sessions 34

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 34

To say the new morning was good would be a big understatement. Compared to the last few days of turmoil it was one of the best Dib had in a while. He had woken up feeling much better than usual lately since he had been able to get a good amount of sleep. There were no nightmares and he was just all around rested. The first thoughts that ran through his mind, though, had been questions of what happened while he was out of it. Such things caused him to get dressed quicker than usual so he could meet the girls downstairs and find out just what happened.

Dib had been ready for some sort of abuse. Maybe to even be told that they had blurted his secret. What he wasn't expecting was for the girls to completely ignore him as he walked into the kitchen. It was eerie, but at the same time he was grateful for none of the usual happenings. The moment he asked about what went on the night before all they gave was a shrug, and that was that. When asked if he would be going to Skool, Dib simply shook his head, deciding that without his pills it would have just been a rough time and still not ready to deal with Zim. Besides, it gave him reason to see if Dwicky really was okay.

That was how he ended up at the apartment door. Dib had called earlier to make sure it was alright and couldn't keep the relief out of his tone when he heard Dwicky's voice. Although the man had sounded a little worn down, that didn't stop Dib from wanting to go over. With Skeets tucked under one arm, he lifted his other to bang on the door, having a sudden burst of excitement at the thought that everything really was okay.

The door opened and a rather mussed Dwicky came to answer. He wore the same white office shirt and black pants he wore last night; then again that's all Dwicky really wore. But this time his clothes looked like he slept in them. There was a package of frozen corn resting on his head and he couldn't help giving the chipper looking Dib a smile, albeit a weak one. "Hey baby, morning." He let the boy in and closed the door promptly after, and flinched when the click shut rattled inside his already sore head. "You look like a bowl of sugared rainbows and cheery sunbeams today." Dwicky smiled weakly again as he walked to the couch, a few glasses and a bottle told exactly what the man had been doing last night; though the pack of cigarettes was an unexpected visitor, it explained the smell.

Dib wrinkled his nose at the smell that assaulted it once he was in the living room. His sudden good mood was knocked down a bit as he caught sight of everything that was around. "And you look just the opposite." He glanced back at Dwicky, his teeth biting at his lip for a moment before he went on. "To put it lightly." He walked towards to couch and leaned against the arm, narrowing his eyes on Dwicky as he studied the man for a few seconds. Only after did he speak up, trying to figure out what happened since he wasn't able to on his own. "What's wrong with you?"

Dwicky stretched out on the couch, one leg draped off its side, relaxing with a drawn out sound. He pulled the bag of corn onto his forehead, hiding most of his face. "Contrary to belief- I am a man of habit." He raised a hand and twirled a finger. "And your sister and her clone are very scary." He pointed at where he thought Dib was, he was completely off. "I completely forgot the potency of the liquor nicotine combo." He exhaled with a 'whew!'. "I haven't done that in ages. And now, just now, I realize why." He tapped the dripping bag of frozen corn. "But after talking to the girls I needed something stiff to drink." He let out another sigh and went limp, letting his tongue loll out of his mouth.

The words only caused Dib to become more upset with the situation. For a while longer he stared at Dwicky's prone form until he finally made his move. He walked over to the side of the couch and removed the bag from Dwicky's face. He paid no attention to the man's protest and instead hit Dwicky in the face with the plush he held. "Stupid!" He pulled Skeets away so Dwicky could see his narrowed eyes, throwing the bag back down on the man's chest. "Just because they're scary people doesn't mean you had to do that." He pointed towards the bottle among other things. Just as quick his hand fell and a frown came to his face. The anger melted away as he became nervous and he started to fidget. "I was still there. I would have still been there for you. Sleep wouldn't have mattered if you were so troubled by everything."

"Owww." Dwicky gave a soft whine as he rubbed his wounded face with a hand. He couldn't help the amused look he gave in return to Dib's words. "I don't think it would have been very proper if I went back into your room after talking to them. Especially if your dad decided to crawl out from inside his lab. He would wonder what the heck I'd be doing in your room while you're out like a log." He chuckled some. "And trust me, Dib, you were sawing some serious wood up there. You'd make a lumberjack jealous." The man pulled the corn back up to rest on his throbbing head. "As tempting as crawling into bed with you was, I had to go home and keep to my own devices." He pulled the bag back over his eyes, trying to relax once more. "…I think I even had to change my pants." he quietly, jokingly added.

The joke did nothing to help Dib feel better. He plopped down on the side of the couch with his back to Dwicky and rested his elbows on his knees, his head soon to follow with his chin on his palms. Skeets took a seat in his lap and he kept his eyes on the plush instead of the mess on the table in front of him. "I should have stayed with you when you talked to them. It probably would have made it easier. I could have went to sleep later." His shoulders slumped a bit and the rest of his body followed. "Maybe then you would have been able to deal with it better."

An arm snuck around Dib's middle, tugging the boy closer to Dwicky. "It went perfect." he spoke softly. "It couldn't have gone better. And you got yourself a good night's sleep for once." Dwicky snagged Dib's wrist to tug the boy onto his front. He pushed the frozen vegetables off his face so he could smile at the boy. "I couldn't ask for more. Except to continue to see you smiling. You look so good today." He gave Dib's nose a playful poke.

Dib blushed at those last few words and he couldn't stay angry for long. The poke to his nose caused it to wrinkle up once again, but since he was closer to Dwicky it was also because of the strong smell from earlier. "You need a shower." Even though the words left him he made no real move to let Dwicky get up any time soon. Instead he raised a free hand from the plushy he held and ran it through the man's hair, trying to sooth his headache. "I'm glad you're okay. That you're safe and everything turned out so well." He smiled once more. His good mood coming back. "It's a little unreal. How did you do it?"

Dwicky shut his eyes, easily giving into the small lull Dib was offering. "Charm and good looks." he murmured, his grin growing. He opened one eye, tilting his head towards Dib's fingers. "Didn't you know, Dib? Love conquers all. It also takes you out to breakfast in celebration." He ran a few fingers along Dib's cheek, minding bandages and bruises. "A celebration that's long over due." He smirked a little slyly. "Maybe we'll actually get some cake for real this time."

That perked Dib up completely and he sat up a bit to look down at Dwicky. "Celebrate?" It was easy to tell by the question that he was excited by the suggestion. Even as he spoke his fingers continued running through the other's hair, still trying to give some comfort. "I'd like that a lot. It's something I was looking forward to when we talked about it." His cheeks went red once more. "Well, I mean, not counting that one time." He raised a brow as he kept his eyes on Dwicky and his smile fell a bit. "Are you sure you feel up to something like celebrating, though?"

"The pain killers will kick in soon." Dwicky sat up with a groan, letting the bag fall off his head and onto the couch. "Anything for you, hm. Anywhere you want. Anything you'd like." He rubbed his damp hair with a hand, squeezing his eyes shut to give a yawning groan as he rubbed his face. "You get treated to a day out with your most chivalrous and good looking _older_ boyfriend while your classmates still suffer in skool." He planted a kiss on Dib's lips. "Aren't you special."

When Dwicky pulled back from the kiss all Dib could do was smack his lips for a few moments before a frown came to his face and he looked at the man. "You're brushing your teeth too." He pointed a finger at the man, trying to be as serious as he could. "I am not letting your lips anywhere near me until you do." He blinked for a second and his hand dropped back down. Finally he looked away and thought about it. "Wait, that didn't come out right."

"Is it that bad?" Dwicky blinked and licked his own lips too. "Ehh. Ugh, I have this bad sour alcohol aftertaste in my mouth. But my lips don't taste all that bad to me." He rubbed his own mouth and smacked his lips a few times. He gave a sly grin. "Then again, I'm not the one being kissed." His grin grew wider as he made kissy lips, leaning after Dib to give him another icky kiss.

Dib gave a squeal and scrambled back as best he could to the other side of the couch. It took a bit since his leg was still hurt, but as he did he held up Skeets in front of himself as if the plush would protect him. "Stay away!" He peeked out from behind the plush and narrowed his eyes on the man. "No kisses for you until you make that disgusting taste go away."

"Aww. Just one more kiss?" Dwicky made kissy noises between grins. He pushed himself onto knees, just as quick and mobile as Dib was with all the aches from his hangover. "Kiiiiiisssss!" He stuck out his arms zombie style and crawled closer to Dib. He took the plush and placed a kiss on its nose and gave a grin after. "See, Skeets doesn't think it tastes so bad."

Dib kept narrowed eyes on Dwicky and moved his hands out to grab Skeets back as quick as he could. "Well, I think it's gross." He stayed where he was and glanced at Dwicky for a second longer before he turned his eyes away. "As soon as you get cleaned up I'll give you as many kisses as you want. Right now I'm off limits." He turned his eyes back on Dwicky and grinned.

"Off limits? Not even one little itty bitty kiss? Just one small kiss?" Dwicky crawled over, placing either hand on the arm of the couch cutting off Dib's escape routes. "What if I just take those kisses, hm? I'll steal them away." He laughed. "It won't be so bad- just like kissing an ashtray." Dwicky tried to attack Dib with kissy lips again.

Dib moved a hand up and placed it on Dwicky's lips, being careful of his one finger as he did. Even if he was trying to get out of the situation, he still couldn't help letting out a small laugh. "No, nothing for you." He moved the hand up and ran it through Dwicky's hair much like he did earlier. "If you get cleaned up then the reward will be much sweeter. I promise." Just to make Dwicky happy, he leaned forward and placed a small kiss on the man's cheek, pulling back after.

Dwicky pouted his frown. "Hmmmph. Just for that- you can't join me in the shower." He pushed to stand from the couch, placing a kiss atop the boy's head as he moved away. "You'll survive. Feel free to help yourself to a snack." He ruffled Dib's hair as he walked to the bathroom.

Dib watched the other walk away while he fixed his messed hair in the process. As soon as Dwicky was out of sight he looked around the living room and a frown came over his face. The thought of cleaning up for Dwicky sounded appealing, especially since the man had helped him out so much already. He looked down at the plush near him and cuddled it close as he moved to get off the couch. "Come on, Skeets. We have a lot to do." As soon as the words left him, Dib went about picking up the mess on the table as best he could and that included the bag of corn left on the couch. He took all he could into the kitchen, deciding to go back for more later when his hands weren't full.

It was a while later that Dib had gotten everything and the living room was clean, but he occupied himself with washing the glasses in the sink instead. It was something to do while Dwicky was still away and he didn't really mind. Skeets sat on the counter near him watching with beady eyes and at times he had to make sure not to get the plush wet as a few drops of water splashed about.

Arms slipped around Dib's middle as a cheek rested atop his head and he was thoroughly cuddled from behind. "Mmm, my own personal little cute Dib maid." Dwicky playfully nibbled the boy's ear, kissing down to his neck with a lazy grin, his goatee tickling the boy's skin a little. "You'll find that I'm quite minty-fresh now." He kissed the boy's cheek, his grin growing wider.

Dib had been startled at first, but the little touches and tickling of skin caused him to relax completely. He finished cleaning the one glass in his hand and set it aside before he turned around in Dwicky's hold and leaned up to press his lips to the man's own. He let out of small muffled noise as he ran his tongue along the other's mouth and pushed his way inside. The kiss lasted for only a bit before he pulled away and grinned. "Much better."

"Mmmm, I agree." Dwicky slid his hands down Dib's sides, pressing the boy against the edge of the counter as he dragged his hands back up along skin, taking the boy's shirt with it. He leaned down to kiss the exposed skin on the boy's chest, finding the difference in height rather poor in his favor. The boy was small and light enough to hoist up higher by his hips, giving Dwicky more of Dib's front to steal away with his mouth. "Much better." he echoed low in his throat with a grin.

Dib let out a small squeak at suddenly being lifted up, ignoring the pain from his bruises as soon as he felt the attention Dwicky gave him. He wasted no time in wrapping his good leg around Dwicky, trying to keep the man where he was as his arms wrapped around the back of his neck. A little sound escaped him, but he didn't mind, too busy leaning forward to bite at the tip of Dwicky's ear.

Dwicky murred against Dib's skin, running his tongue across barely faded bruises along the boy's ribs. His hand slid across the boy's chest, pushing the shirt up higher. He kissed across new bare skin, lifting Dib up until he sat on the counter. He blinked when they bumped a fuzzy red and black spotted bundle. "Oh, hello Skeets." Dwicky grinned lazily at the plush as he slowly ran his hand up and down Dib's front, letting it fall lower and lower with each movement. "Enjoying the show?" he gave a throaty chuckle.

Each little noise Dib made was muffled against Dwicky's ear as he paid special attention to it. He nibbled gently on the rim as his teeth made their way down, never once letting up. One of his hands moved to the other ear to twist at the gold stud, finding the action enjoyable each time he got his hands on the piece of jewelry. As Dwicky moved his hands lower, though, it caused Dib to pull his mouth away for a split second so he could give a tiny moan. Just as quickly his tongue moved out to lick the spot he let go.

Dwicky let audibly breathy exhale against Dib's chest, staying still for a moment while Dib toyed with his ear. He gave the boy's chest a few more kisses before he traced a nub with his tongue, pinching it with teeth before lavishing new attention on it. It was hard enough to pull away from what he was doing and what Dib was doing to him but some how Dwicky managed, his hand moving where his mouth had been. "I'm so happy you're okay, and we're okay, and things are okay- and- and… uh… it'll all be okay now." He gave a breathless sound after speaking, more surprised he spoke than anything.

Dib had given a pathetic sounding whine when Dwicky pulled away. It soon died when Dwicky's hand replaced where his mouth had been on his chest. Behind Dwicky his foot twisted around as he gave another small needy sound. He tried to pay attention to what the other said, but the most he could do was nod his head and hope that was enough. To make up for it he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Dwicky's, running fingers through the man's hair as he did.

Dwicky deepened the kiss quickly, running his tongue along Dib's, never getting enough of a taste inside the boy's mouth. It felt like months since he'd been able to touch the boy even if it only had been a day. He pulled from the boy's mouth, licking away the wet trail that followed. He placed a few more wanting kisses before he finally spoke. "... Skeets is staring." Dwicky picked up the plush to poke its head at Dib's face with a horrible teasing grin. "I think he's jealous."

Dib pouted for a few seconds as he took his hands back and wrapped them around the plush instead. "Jealousy doesn't suit him very well." He looked back up at Dwicky and gave a small grin. "Although, I guess he does have a right to be jealous. All of the plans you have to steal me away. What's to say you won't just steal me away from him?" He moved Skeets up and pretended to attack Dwicky's face with the plush. "Maybe you'll have a fight to the death for my affections."

"Eep. Well, I guess I should lavish some attention on him too." Dwicky took up Skeets from Dib and cuddled the plush in his arms. "Well hello there Skeets. You're looking rather- i sensual /i this morning." He began to pet the ladybug's back. "Ohhh, you like that do you? You're such a naughty buggy. You shouldn't say things like that- Dib is right here. No, not now. I'm trying to seduce my Dib right now on the kitchen counter. Yea, I know I prepare food on this counter. But that's what cleaning sprays are for." He cocked his head. "Hm? Well- maybe _one_ kiss. The rest are for Dib." Dwicky gave a quick kiss to the plush's head and then handed him to Dib. "Now hopefully you aren't the jealous one." He grinned at Dib.

Dib took Skeets back while keeping narrowed eyes on Dwicky. "If I didn't know any better I'd think you were cheating on me." He gave a small little playful pout. "And here I thought you only had eyes for me." He couldn't help but grin. "And hands, among other things." Skeets was set aside so Dib could place his arms around Dwicky once more. "I might be a little jealous, but only because I want you all to myself." He gave a small quick lick to Dwicky's bottom lip then pulled back to speak again. "Every bit of you." He rested his head under the man's chin, feeling relaxed enough to keep it there for the moment. "Especially after everything that's happened lately."

Dwicky rested his head atop Dib's, slipping arms around him, a hand ran up and down his back out of sheer habit. "Such a greedy little Dib. But you're _my_ greedy little Dib. And I wouldn't share you for anything. Not a thing, to no one." He chuckled a little and placed a small kiss atop the boy's head. "Not even a plush." His hand ran down the boy's side and affectionately stroked the boy's thigh. "I guess it really would be a fight to the death." He grinned against the boy's hair. "Though, I have faced the worst of the worst yesterday, so I'll be quite the match." He buried his face in Dib's dark hair, taking him in with a deep inhale. "...I'm so happy everything's alright..." he spoke more softly in a much more fragile voice.

Dib closed his eyes, wanting to enjoy the peace that he was finally allowed. Dwicky's words caused him to smile a little and cuddle up closer to the man's chest as best he could. "I hope everything stays this way. I mean, it has to, right? Nothing can possibly go wrong anymore. If you were able to make everything better then everything should be okay." He opened his eyes back up and leaned his head back to look up at the other. "Maybe time will go a little quicker now and in no time we'll have what we want, right?"

Dwicky's eyes fell on Dib and he gave the smallest of smiles as his brows furrowed a little. "Right..." A hand rose to touch Dib's cheek, running along it as if it were something he had just been granted touch of. "Mm, yea... quicker. Much quicker." He seemed to consider something and in the end he just cupped Dib's cheek, running his fingers delicately down to the boy's neck, brushing against the short dark hair against Dib's head. The man searched Dib's face a moment, though he didn't say what it was, and in the end he only smiled softly as if the serious moment never crossed him. "So, where would you like to go today?"

Dib leaned into the touches while he thought about the question. Having been reminded once more about his small celebration caused the excitement to come back again and his one leg fell down to kick against the counter. "Somewhere to eat, maybe for breakfast. I kind of left the house without eating again, but it was mostly because I wanted to see you." He dropped his hands down and grabbed Dwicky's arms until he was able to take both of the man's hands into his own. "It was nice when we were able to eat out that one time. I've wanted to do that again for a while." He stayed silent for a little bit, just staring at their hands before he finally spoke up again, a little afraid of the answer he would get. "We could maybe just walk around the city for a little while and just be with each other. Like a couple, right? Everyone thinks you're my dad anyway." He shrugged at that. "As long as we don't do any of the obvious and we're just able to go out with each other I'm happy."

"Your dad, mff." Dwicky rolled his eyes remembering that. "Don't remind me. I didn't think I looked _that_ old just yet; makes the situation appear just a little more wrong than it should." He sighed and shook his head looking down at their hands as well, turning them so he could hold Dib's best he could. "But anything for you. I'll just enjoy spending some actual quality time with you. It's been ages since I've had you for an entire day all to myself-- especially without worry about some minor detail." Dwicky raised either of Dib's hands so he could kiss them one after the other respectively. "This is my treat to you, for doing so well."

Dib looked up at Dwicky's face for a few seconds before he quickly looked away towards the wall. "You really think that?" He dropped his eyes to the floor. "That I've been doing well, even with everything that's happened? I still listened to what I was told, even when I said to you that I would try my best not to." A worried look crossed his face, but he still kept his eyes averted for the time being. "I don't think that really means I'm doing well at all." His hands tightened around Dwicky's, trying to seek out any comfort he could.

The man's hands let go of Dib's to slip past to take either side of the boy's face, lifting his head gently up, so that at least Dib's face would look at him even if his eyes wouldn't. "You're out of there. You're actually _out_. No more padded roomed visits, no more sneaking to unbuckle your jacket, you're out, and out for good. That's a one hell of an accomplishment if you ask me, Dib." He gently brushed a thumb along the boy's cheek, drawing down to thumb his bottom lip. His voice fell quieter. "Now you have to pick up where you left off three years later, you have to act normal in a world that isn't what you see on TV screens and colored mock-up billboards. Life's been tough for you, and it hasn't stopped, I can see that now. You try so hard despite the outcome, and no one sees it." Dwicky let one hand to brush a few dark strands that were never on the boy's forehead. "…If I don't cut you a little slack, who will?"

As soon as his head was lifted, Dib moved his eyes to Dwicky's face. Each word said caused him to hold his breath for a moment, not really expecting such things to be said. After Dwicky was finished speaking Dib took no time moving away from the man's hands so he could bury his face in the other's chest. He wasn't upset, but he just felt the need to be closer to Dwicky. The words were something he needed to hear, but he was still scared. Not half as bad as he had been lately with everything going on. It was only something he had to learn to deal with. "I'm glad I have you to talk to." The words came later in a quiet voice as Dib wrapped his arms around Dwicky's waist and let his hands trail up the man's back. "I'm just glad I have you."

A hand rested atop Dib's head, and soon both of Dwicky's hands gently messed with the boy's hair. "Me too." His hands fell down to Dib's shoulders where he wrapped his arms around the boy as well, tucking the other's head under his chin. "You're strong, and I know it's been a long time since you've gone up against anything. But you have to try to stand on your own two feet. I know the worst enemy we have is ourselves, but if you can conquer that then you can face anything. All you've ever needed was someone to just listen, and believe you when you said you tried, you really tried. And I do, Dib, I believe you did. You've been so scared of repercussions now that you don't know who to listen to. Especially when the one person here whose been trying to spout nothing but truths has been a hypocrite himself. But I'm going to try to make things easier... for you. I'm going to make sure what happened these last few days don't happen again." He rubbed either hand up and down Dib's back. "You'll just have to trust me, and believe that I'm just looking out for you." Dwicky rested his lips in Dib's hair, sighing a warm breath there. He knew he was being vague to no end, but he didn't want to elaborate just yet.

"I believe you right now." Dib pulled back only a bit so he could look up at Dwicky's face. "After what happened, you were able to make things better. Even this entire time, you're the only one that's been with me." He looked away towards the floor. "I trust you and only you. I know sometimes I say things to you that make it seem the complete opposite, but I don't mean to and I'm sorry." He snuggled himself back against Dwicky's chest without once looking back up at the other. "I really do love you." He couldn't help the small grin that came to his lips. "And I'm sorry for the hangover my sister caused you to have."

Dwicky managed to grin a little back, giving a soft chuckle against Dib's hair. "You're worth several hundred hangovers. Hm, I just don't seem to learn my lesson the first time." He smirked some. "Don't ask how many times I watched our video, I think I've memorized the lines by heart. I'm obsessive, more than compulsive." He ran his hand a few times against Dib's back. He paused a moment. "...You hid my smokes, didn't you, kiddo."

Dib didn't lift his head as he answered the other. "No, you must have lost them." He didn't sound completely innocent as hard as he tried, and it caused him to quickly change the subject. "See, I told you we would be able to make better memories. It helped at least a little, right? Even with what I had to tell you, we were still able to at least enjoy ourselves as best we could." He smiled a bit. "You were right; it wasn't a total waste in the end."

"Tear stained, but happy." Dwicky nodded in agreement. "Happier than before anyway." And that said a lot more than Dwicky liked to think about. "But I am glad you told me, despite everything, it all worked out in the end. _See_ what talking your problems out can do." He planted a quick kiss at Dib's cheek before he tried to subtly check Dib's pockets for the missing cigarettes.

Dib grabbed onto Dwicky's wrist and pulled the man's hand away as he moved back to look up at the other. "They aren't in my pants, so you should stop. Unless you plan on reaching for what you normally reach for." He let go of Dwicky's hand and gave the man a quick kiss on the lips before he hopped down from the counter, taking Skeets and making his way towards the living room.

"H-hey. What kind of comment is that?" Dwicky paused to give an unsure frown before pouting a little. "I-I'm not like that. I'm not like that at all. I don't _always_ reach..._there_." He opened his mouth and pointed. "I am not just after _that_. I'm not a pervert." He followed Dib into the living room. "I am not a horny old man!" Dwicky glanced about suddenly confused and unsure. "I don't think... so." His brows furrowed as he fretted some, scratching his head to think it over.

Dib had turned around when Dwicky came into the living room. He leaned against the arm of the couch to face the other, amused at the sudden confusion Dwicky was going through. Although he tried his best not to show it, but it was hard to keep a serious face. "I never said you were any of those things nor do I think you're any of those things." A tiny smile finally came to his face after he spoke up as he continued to watch Dwicky.

"Alright then." Dwicky nodded, letting his hand fall back down to his side. He stared a moment and rubbed the back of his head looking thoughtful "... What was I doing again?" he murmured off hand to himself.

"You were taking me out to breakfast and other nice things." Dib walked away from the couch and over to Dwicky to tug at the man's arm with his free hand. "I'm starving, so come on." He grinned a bit. "Don't you wanna spend your well earned cash on your lickable boyfriend?" He tugged one more time.

"Oh, yea, right. Going for breakfast, spending time together, celebrating." Dwicky moved his arm to take Dib's hand in his. "Getting your medication renewed. And all that fun stuff." He closed one eye, tapping his lips with a finger as he looked at Dib hard. "...You didn't hide them under the couch cushions did you?"

Dib narrowed his eyes on Dwicky and stayed silent for a few moments. Finally, he took his hand back as he began to pout. "No, I didn't." He looked away towards the door. "You could act at least a little more enthused that we're going out together instead of worried over where I hid those things." He glared at Dwicky out the corner of his eyes.

"HA!" Dwicky pointed at Dib instantly. "So you _did_ hide them!" He poked Dib's cheek with his accusing finger a few times.

Dib blushed a bit in embarrassment at being found out. He quickly pushed Dwicky's hand away and turned to face the man with narrowed eyes. "That's not the point." He let out a heavy sigh as he looked away from the other once more.

Dwicky turned Dib's head to look back his with a finger at his chin, giving a warm grin. "Then what's the point? The point is you want love, affection and attention lavished upon you all day today, no questions asked." He planted a quick kiss on the boy's lips. "Is that it?"

Dib looked surprised for a moment before he quickly looked away again. "Well... I mean..." He started to stutter and tried to get his words in order before he started again. "I guess so." He chanced a look back at Dwicky as he continued to pout once more. "Unless you'd rather stay here and smoke."

Dwicky shook his head and chuckled. "No. You wouldn't kiss me if I did." He made an amused sound. "But drinking is another story it seems." He ruffled the boy's hair as he went off to search for his wallet for the trip out.

"You tasted better then and less like an ash tray." Dib had spoken loud enough so Dwicky could hear him and kept his eyes on where the man had walked off to. When he was sure Dwicky was completely out of sight he walked back into the kitchen and to the sink, which he had yet to let the water out of. With a free hand, Dib reached into the cloudy water and moved it around for a few moments before he finally pulled out what Dwicky had been looking for, although now very soggy. Dib looked them over for a few moments before he walked over to the trashcan dumping them in and shaking his hand off afterwards.

"Found it!" Dwicky returned, shoving his wallet into his pocket. He dusted his hands off before his eyes fell on Dib. He raised a brow, tilting his head with half a smirk. "…You have a very guilty look on your face."

Dib had quickly turned around to face Dwicky and placed his wet hand behind his back. "No I don't!" He realized he said the words much too quickly and loudly and tried again. "I mean, no I don't." He tried to get the attention away from him as he changed the subject much like he had before. "Are we ready to go yet? I really wanna get something to eat."

Dwicky's thick dark brows raised as he gave Dib a rather disbelieving half lidded gaze, his smirk never left him. "Really?" He took as casual a step as he could towards Dib, looking the boy over top to bottom and side to side; a skeptical inspection made over the boy.

Dib nodded his head quickly. "Really." Behind himself, Dib tried his best to wipe his hand off on the back of his shirt. Each way Dwicky moved, Dib turned away from the man so what he was hiding couldn't be seen. That didn't stop the trash can from being in plain view and he had to quickly position himself back in front of it as best he could.

"Hmmm." Dwicky narrowed his eyes for a moment. "You know where lying got you last time, kiddo." He gave Dib's nose a little poke. But in the end he shrugged, giving up just as easy. "Let's just get going, alright?" He offered his hand over to Dib to take.

Dib opened his mouth about to say something in retaliation to those words, but just as quickly he thought against it. He dropped his eyes to Dwicky's hand, staring at it for a bit before he actually took it with the hand he had hidden behind his back. He clutched Skeets tightly and stayed silent, only nodding his head to Dwicky's words.

The man led Dib to and out the door, locking it behind them. He gave the boy a wry look. "By the by, you smell like wet tobacco." And Dwicky left it at that.


	35. Sessions 35

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 35

After the two had left the apartment Dib had wasted no time in bugging Dwicky once more about breakfast. It was only after a stop at the asylum to pick up a new prescription that Dwicky would agree to anything. Dib had opted to stay near the exit doors as far away from the place as he could, but still near Dwicky's line of sight. When everything was taken care of Dib was more than happy to be out of there. As soon as they were in the city and after they had picked up his pills, he dragged the man away to grab some food, taking advantage of the fact he was the one being treated. Over the entire course of the meal, Dib had made small little jokes and it had been as if he were back to his normal self and nothing of the past few days ever happened.

After breakfast Dib once again pulled Dwicky away just to enjoy the fact he could be with the other. It was better than staying stuck in the apartment, hiding away from prying eyes. Dib refused to let go of Dwicky's hand, realizing it couldn't do any harm since people thought they were related anyway. As they walked he kept his eyes on a few of the shop windows they passed by, once or twice stopping, jerking Dwicky beside him so he could look in at whatever interested him. That included the window full of lava lamps that held him at the moment.

Dwicky stood beside the boy watching the globs of color lazily shift up and around in their containers. It was captivating, that slow lethargic movement of colors, melding around but never mixing; like oil and water. "There's something strangely relaxing about lava lamps.. My parents owned one, I'd stare at it for hours at a time." He chuckled. "Taken with any particular colour?"

Dib pointed his finger at a lamp in the far corner, lava with a dark blue and the color around it minty green. "That one." He let his finger drop back down and continued to stare at the lamp, watching the blue color go up and down inside the container. After a few seconds he stood up straight and turned his eyes back to Dwicky, giving a small smile. "They are really calming. I never realized it until now, being able to look at them for longer than a second."

Dwicky glanced at the lamp Dib pointed out a second with a thoughtful expression before looking back to Dib with a smile. "Would you like it?"

Dib blinked his eyes in a bit of surprise at the question. The surprise immediately turned to excitement and he couldn't help bouncing on the balls of his feet while he reached his hand back out to tug on Dwicky's own. "Yes!" He realized how loud he answered and quickly lowered his voice. "I mean, yes please." He gave a sheepish smile.

Dwicky laughed and he tugged Dib into the shop. The shop was littered with brightly coloured, psychedelic, peace and love seventies items. It was like walking into a flowery rainbow splattered painting. He gave a whistle at the sight. He pointed to the lava lamps as he fished out his wallet. "Just go ahead and grab what you like."

Dib had no trouble doing just that and walked right over to the lamps. He picked up the one which he had been staring at the entire time, having to shift Skeets around to grab it with both hands since it was a bit heavy. His own eyes looked around at each brightly colored trinket that littered the store as he walked back towards Dwicky. It was all very eye catching and he had to stop himself from picking up a few of the beaded bracelets that were on the counter.

"Is there anything else you'd like, kiddo?" Dwicky couldn't help but notice Dib's interest in other things about the store. He easily gave a shrug with his grin, leaning on one arm on the counter. "Money is no object today."

Dib turned his eyes back on Dwicky and tried his best to keep his expression innocent. "Well, if you put it that way." He placed the lamp on the counter and picked up the bracelets he had his eyes on, putting them with the lamp. Without a word he walked away from the counter to explore the rest of the shop, leaving Dwicky to hang out at the counter for a bit while he looked around. It didn't take very long for him to find a few things that interested him and bring them back. A few different colored tie dye shirts and a necklace with a beaded charm were placed on top of each other on the counter. Dib stood up on toes and tried to look over it all as he glanced up towards Dwicky giving a small smile.

"I see we're liking the array of color here. Very nice." Dwicky returned the smile. "Nice and cheerful, right?" He couldn't help glancing around the room, nostalgia for his younger days. "Maybe I should get something too. My apartment could use some bright neon. I guess I could use color as well." He glanced down at his white shirt, black slacks and watch. He patted his shirt and looked back to Dib. "Maybe we should get something matching?" he suggested with a grin.

Dib nodded his head at the idea as he turned around fully to face Dwicky. "You could use a change anyway." He grinned at the teasing words and reached a hand out, tugging at Dwicky's arm. "So, pick out something. This is the perfect place to get something completely different."

"Hmm, what do you think I should get? Some tie-dye shirts? Flower sticks for the car? A horribly tacky rug? Peace sign arm bands?" Dwicky laughed. Then something caught his eye. "Oh hey, I know." He tugged Dib over to a table. He took Dib's hand resting it on his palm and slipped a ring on his ring finger, letting his touch linger with the action. "Mood rings."

Dib had kept his eyes down and watched as Dwicky slipped the ring on his finger. His eyes stared into the stone which very slowly started to change color. He kept his hand on Dwicky's palm, letting it rest there even though the ring was already in place and only after a few seconds did he finally wiggle his fingers and pull his hand back. Without a word he picked up a mood ring and took Dwicky's hand, sliding the ring on the man's ring finger much the same way, letting their hands fall after, but keeping them linked together as he smiled up at the other.

It took all that Dwicky had to refrain from leaning down to kiss Dib after that. Instead he just brushed a few fingers against he boy's chin, trying to make the touch as brief as possible. But it didn't stop him from smiling back. He walked back over to the counter, with Dib in toe. He paid for the items, handing Dib the bag soon after. "Is there a new destination? or shall we just wander some more?" They left the store, still hand in hand.

Dib thought about the question as he swung the bag beside him as best he could while clutching Skeets. "I don't mind just walking around some more." He watched as few people walked by them. A lot of the people that were usually out on the streets were more than likely at work, so the city wasn't as crowded for the moment. "I'm sure something will catch my eye again."

"If it's colorful or shiny, I'm sure it will." Dwicky chuckled, shoving his other hand in a pocket. He looked up at the sky, a warm blue with barely a trail of white cotton to be seen. "It's such a nice day. Too nice to be in skool, don't you agree?" He grinned Dib's way. "No competition for anything since all your fellow classmates are locked away tight indoors." He looked back up to the sky. "It's a shame too, such a beautiful day."

Dib thought over those words as he looked over at Dwicky for a few moments. A slow smile started to form on his face and he became excited once again as he began to walk in front of Dwicky while turning around to face the man. He tugged on the other's hand, urging him along while he spoke up. "Let's go to the park. Barely anyone will be there." He tugged a little more. "At least not like before when we tried to go."

"Okay, okay, we'll go to the park." Dwicky laughed a little, picking up his pace so Dib wouldn't drag him there the entire way. "Just you and me. And some trees. And possibly some old folks feeding pigeons."

Dib laughed at those last words and continued to tug Dwicky through the streets. There were a few times he bumped into a couple of people, but he didn't seem to mind and only muttered a small apology each time under his breath. The park wasn't too far of a walk and it wasn't long before they reached it. It was then that Dib finally let go of Dwicky's hand, making his way onto the grass and towards the swing set, not really minding the few people that were hanging around for the moment.

Dwicky trailed along behind, shoving his free hand into his other pocket. He was impressed with just how greatly improved Dib had become in such a short amount of time. The boy looked so happy with the worry and guilt lifted from his shoulders. What impressed Dwicky the most was how well Dib was acting with people now; crowds didn't terrify him, and he wasn't clinging to him like he normally would, never daring to leave his side. It had Dwicky smiling at Dib's back and something swelling to a pleasant ache in his chest. He walked to lean against one of the swing's metal polls, crossing his arms to watch.

Dib had set the bag down as soon as he was near the swing and took up one for himself. He kicked his legs a bit to start swinging, moving back and forth as he turned his attention towards Dwicky. He nodded his head towards the swing next to him and gave a small smile before he spoke up. "Swing with me?"

Dwicky turned his attention to the other swing, looking at it as if it were the most foreign thing he'd seen. He gave a nervous chuckle. "I haven't swung on a swing for ages." He tentatively walked over to it. "With my luck I'll crash it horribly some how." He sat down on it, though it was a bit too low for him. Instead of swinging like Dib he pushed himself with his legs to slowly rock back and forth.

The action seemed to satisfy Dib enough and his smile grew. With his free hand, he reached up to grab onto one of the metal chains, keeping it held as he swung a bit higher. "I haven't been on one in a long time either." He turned his attention back on Dwicky even as he continued to swing. "I think so far its holding up pretty well under you." He couldn't help but grin.

"Same with you." Dwicky leaned his head against the chain to watch Dib swing. "Looking really good there." He gave a small soft smile. "Really good." He lazily rocked himself back and forth on the swing.

Dib smiled back at Dwicky and slowly bit by bit he stopped to rock back and forth much like the other was. He reached his hand out to touch Dwicky's own which was on the chain and walked his fingers up and down the man's hand as he spoke up. "I like being outside again, just like the first time. I feel much better now and it's nice that I just get to be with you." He let his hand fall below Dwicky's on the chain as he looked at the man's face. "I'm glad I get to enjoy being out, since you were able to fix everything."

The man's hand slipped from the swing's chain to run up and down Dib's forearm, an innocent enough action to be seen, but either knew better. "I agree. Full heartedly." Dwicky gave a quick glance around before leaning down to subtly place a kiss on Dib's knuckle that gripped his swing's chain. "I like this… I like this a lot." He idly toyed with the ring on Dib's finger to no real ends.

The small actions left Dib even more pleased with the situation. He kept his hand right where it was as Dwicky played with the ring and let his head lean against the chain to his own swing. "This isn't bad. We didn't want to worry about being as careful when I got out and here we are." He kicked his legs a bit at the ground as he continued to rock. "Besides one small little mishap, I think everything is turning out just fine." His voice lowered a bit. "Maybe four years won't seem so bad now."

"Maybe." Dwicky quietly echoed, finally resting his hand over Dib's smaller one. He parted fingers so he could look at Dib's ring. "Blue." He gave a small chuckle. "Maybe we should have picked up a color legend. But... I think it means happy." He stroked his thumb slowly on the boy's hand. "You certainly sound happy to me."

"I am." Dib smiled wide once again as he got up off the swing only to turn and face Dwicky, standing in front of the man. He continued to keep their hands around each other, not wanting to loose the contact just yet. "The only reason I felt so upset was because of so much going on. I was worried about you, but now I know everything is going to be alright, so I feel like I can actually get better. Especially since my head is clearer now." He gave a relieved smile at that.

Dwicky gave a nod of agreement. Without giving it much thought he reached out and tugged Dib onto his lap, keeping him gathered up so he could still lazily rock. "You're doing an excellent job, don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise. You've come a long way." He rested his chin on Dib's shoulder. "I'm very proud of you."

The sudden action startled Dib. He wasn't expecting such a move after what they had just gone through lately, but all the same he couldn't help cuddling close to Dwicky. "It's because of you. I don't think I could have done any of this on my own. I mean, I was never able to in the past. That's what kept me where I was to begin with." He pulled back a bit so he was able to look at Dwicky. "I'm glad I could make you proud of me. Even through every down part of the entire thing. It's nice to hear."

"Heh, a combined effort then. See, we do make a good team after all." Dwicky gave the boy a quick kiss on the cheek, still continuing to slowly rock. "Isn't that right, _partner_." He couldn't help grinning some with the remark.

Dib smiled at the words and nodded his head. "Right." He stayed cuddled close to Dwicky as the movement started to relax him. "Tomorrow I think I'll feel even better about going back to Skool. Maybe things will be okay when I go. I'll be able to make friends and just have an actual life outside of the asylum, like I wanted." He frowned a bit. "That's if everything turns out okay." He pulled back once again as he thought over his own words. "I don't know if you can fix what happened with Zim."

"I think things will be much better now." Dwicky tucked back a few strands from the boy's forehead, tenderly fussing over the boy's hair. "You'll see. You'll do fine now. You have so much skool work to catch up on." He gently tsked. "You'll have plenty to keep you busy. You could even use the excuse to get notes from previous classes to make yourself a friend to start." He chuckled slyly. "Maybe a cute boy or girl." he teased, briefly tickling Dib's side.

Dib flinched away from the touch with a small laugh. He stuck his tongue out at Dwicky for a few seconds before he spoke up again. "That means they'll probably pile a lot of homework onto me. I might not even have time for friends." He gave a slight grin as he looked at Dwicky. "Unless I bring my work with me when I visit you and talk you into helping me here and there."

Dwicky rubbed his forehead, looking skyward as he combed his hair back with his fingers. "Wow. It's been ages since I was back in skool. I don't know if I'd be more of a hindrance than a help. But I guess I could try. Though the only thing I really paid attention much to was science, and that's only because I loved astronomy. I used to memorize stars for fun." He laughed. "Now I couldn't tell you a star's name to save my life." It was such a lie, but for a good cause. "At least I know the name of the planet that counts." His arms slipped tighter around Dib's middle, and Dwicky affectionately cuddled the boy.

Dib gave a happy noise at the affection. He nuzzled his face against Dwicky's neck before pulling back once more to look at the other. "I still know some things about science. A lot of it was drilled into my head, considering who I lived with my whole life. I'm sure I'll pick most of it back up." He shrugged a shoulder and smiled a bit. "The other subjects will just have to be hit or miss. As long as I have some help along the way, right?"

Dwicky nodded. "Right. Though I think a teacher or a textbook will be more helpful than I'll be." He laughed quietly. He glanced out across the terrain of the park, barely a soul was around save for a jogger and cyclist or two, a few parents with strollers and children who were just too young to be in skool yet. No one seemed to pay them much mind, or that Dib was even out of skool, and that suited Dwicky just fine. It had him relaxing all the more there, content to just swing as he was.

Dib allowed himself to lay across Dwicky's chest. His cheek pressed against the man's shoulder and he closed his eyes after a few minutes. "We should do this a lot more. Even if it's not for celebration or anything special like that. We should just go out to spend time together." He moved an arm up to wrap it around Dwicky's neck in a loose hold, to stay cuddled close. "No one is watching. No one really cares." He smiled a bit. "Things have been fine so far today."

Dwicky didn't nod right away, his mind had wandered off somewhere, watching an old married couple slowly stroll across the grass to the park bench with a bag of scrap bread, the pigeons eagerly cooed and walked around, bobbing their heads by the benches in anticipation of a free meal. Dwicky lazily rubbed Dib's side, resting his then atop Dib's. He didn't have much to say after that, so he idly hummed.

The sudden quiet around the two allowed for each small noise to be heard that went on through the park. It was after a few moments that hesitant footsteps started to make their way towards the two from the right. With each step the grass made a slight noise until finally it was a voice that cut through the silence. "Dwicky?" A hand reached out to grab at the nearest chain to stop the swing as a bit of realization came through in the person's voice. "Man, it is you! Hey, if all you were doing was babysitting the entire time you've been away then the least you could of done was call, ya know?"

It had been someone other than himself saying Dwicky's name which startled Dib. The quick stop that the swing took didn't help much either and caused him to jerk up from the relaxed position he had been in. Dib's eyes wandered from Dwicky and over to the sudden company they had with wide eyes, wondering how the person had known the other's name at all.

Dwicky had the worse start of all and he nearly accidentally let Dib drop onto the gravel, and he would have had he not froze entirely, practically clutching Dib in that instant. He could feel the colour drain from his face, but when he saw who it was it had him letting out a small nervous chuckle. "Ohhh, hi Trec. Heh. Long time no see." he answered back in a weak voice. He let Dib off of himself to let the boy stand, better to not incriminate themselves more than what was seen.

Trec paid no mind to the boy for the moment and instead kept his attention on Dwicky as he leaned against one of the poles which held the swing set up. "No kidding. I'd say three years definitely counts as a long time. You ever heard of a thing called post cards?" He raised a brow at the other before turning his attention on the one beside Dwicky. "So, what's with the kid? Is he yours?" He laughed at that thought immediately. "I never figured you for the type to settle down."

Dib glared at the man, suddenly taking an instant dislike in him. He never really liked being called a kid and lately it was becoming a habit of most people around him. The last few things the other said caused him to narrow his eyes a bit more and when Trec had his attention away, Dib stuck out his tongue at the man before he could get caught.

"N-no." Dwicky tried to clear his throat, make his voice sound a little bolder so Trec wouldn't notice the shaking worry in it. He glanced at Dib, catching the immature gesture, causing him to laugh a little. "This is Dib." He gestured to the boy. "He's a patient of mine. I'm his personal counselor. Counseled him from the institution straight out. He's really come a long way, I'm truly proud of him." Dwicky gave a smile before gesturing to the other for Dib. "Dib, Trec. Trec is a good friend of mine from college." He smirked some. "Who seems to have missed me."

Trec waved his hand a bit to dismiss such a comment. "Boredom, that's all." He turned his eyes back to Dib and looked the boy over for a bit before he nodded his head. "Nice to meet you, Dib." When he got only a nod back in response, Trec turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "Institution, huh? I thought you were some Skool counselor? When did they knock you down to work with the crazy people?" He couldn't help grinning. "Did they not like the fact you decided to take an extended vacation or something?"

Dib frowned at that, taking such words a bit personal. He glared once more at Trec for a few seconds before he walked away from the two and back to his own swing. There he sat down and rocked back and forth while glancing at the two out the corner of his eyes.

Dwicky glanced at Dib before back at his friend. "C'mon Trec, be nice." He coughed into a fist purposely. "Besides.. I quit. It just wasn't doing it for me. I left with some friends to travel for a few." He twirled a finger. "I just got back actually, rather recently." He smiled tiredly. "Turns out it's true, you can't run away from your problems." He loosely gestured to his friend. "What about you? What's been keeping you busy?"

Trec raised a brow before he finally shrugged his shoulders. "Nothing really. Just hanging out at a few places here and there to keep myself entertained. It's been boring around here without you or any of the other guys we used to know. Not to mention I hate the job I have." He raised a hand up to run through his hair. "I should have paid more attention in college. Now I'm stuck with a crappy part time job at the mall." His hand dropped and as it did he turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "So, who went with you on your trip? I didn't hear anything about it from anyone we hung around."

The last question grabbed Dib's attention and he sat up straight on the swing. His eyes turned on Dwicky, wanting to know even more about the three years Dwicky had been gone, and suddenly he had a chance.

Dwicky shook his head, feeling more than one gaze on him. "No, no one you'd know. Friends outside of skool." He smirked a little, just needing to change the subject to turn the heat away from himself. "And you use to chastise me about studying too much. Now you're getting to middle age and you're working for teenagers." He laughed, even if it was mean; payback for the earlier comments. "So what are you doing? Counseling the cola? Or little left-behind kids in the day care ball pit who have attachment disorder and A.D.D.?" He tapped his fingertips together.

Trec gave a groan at such comments. "You're not very far off on that last one." He shook his head a bit. "I can't believe how many people bring their kids to such a big place, day after day." He reached a hand out to grip the closest chain on Dwicky's swing and shook it a bit while narrowing his eyes on the other. "Remind me once again why I ever decided it would be such a joy to work with kids. I must have been out of my mind at the time." He let go of the chain and looked away. "I ended up locking a few of them in one of the employee only stations until my shift was over."

Dib blinked his eyes at that and suddenly felt it best that he stay silent around Trec. Or at the very least try his best not to make any loud noises to annoy the man. Instead, Dib swung back and forth on his swing as he continued to listen.

Dwicky raised his brows and shook his head. "This coming from the guy who wanted to open his own day care and 'better the minds of children everywhere'." He laughed. "Wasn't that the coined phrase you were using at the time? And then you met Macks, and everything went down hill from there." Dwicky laughed again. "Ah, good times. Good times. Seeing anyone? Or are you married and with child?" Dwicky snerked.

"No, no, no." Trec quickly shook his head at those questions. "I'm still very much alone and planning to keep it that way." He made a face before he went on. "I still don't see what's so great about any kind of relationship. You know I never liked the idea." He raised a brow as he turned the question back to Dwicky. "What about you?"

Dib quickly looked away at that, feeling extremely nervous in that moment. He looked down at the ground below him as he kicked his feet. It was such a time where he wished they didn't have to keep it a secret, but he knew the truth wouldn't be the best idea. In fact, it would be the worst idea.

Dwicky loosely shrugged his shoulders, pushing with his feet on the ground to start swinging lazily back and forth again. His feet suddenly became very interesting.

Trec blinked his eyes at the response he got, but after a few seconds he couldn't help grinning. "What's that mean?" He moved forward a bit just so he could poke Dwicky in the shoulder. "It means something, doesn't it? Tell me what it means." He poked again.

Dwicky tried to lean away from the onslaught of poking. "Hmph. You're a counselor too ya'know." He rubbed his shoulder. "You tell me what it means." He smirked a little back.

Trec moved back a bit and frowned. "Man, come on. I'm off work right now, so technically I'm not a counselor at the moment." He moved a hand to scratch at the back of his head as he grinned. "But, if you want to have it your way, then I say it means you're avoiding the topic because unlike me you are no longer a single man." His hand dropped and he feigned shock. "Could it be true?"

It was easy to tell that Dib was trying to keep his laughter held in as his head stayed bowed. He found it funny how Trec was acting to the situation. Not to mention the situation in itself had turned a bit comical to him.

Dwicky narrowed his eyes but still smirked, in the end he shrugged, gripping the chains of the swings as he continued to idly swing. "I may be interested in someone." he answered back as casual as he could.

Trec blinked his eyes at getting nothing else from Dwicky and it finally had him groaning. "Oh come on. You have to give me more than that." He finally moved away from the pole he had been leaning against and stood in front of Dwicky. "Who is it? Someone we know?" He raised a brow. "Someone you met from that trip you went on?"

Dwicky raised his brows, looking up at his friend with slight amusement. "Nosey much, Trec?" He shook his head. "No, you don't know them."

"Curiosity, my dear friend." Trec shrugged and moved to lean back against the pole. "It's not like anything interesting ever goes on in this city. I might as well suck out all the news I can before things become dull again." He smirked. "And bugging you after three years away is good enough for me."

Dwicky shook his head. "I think it's about time you found yourself a girl... -or guy." Dwicky snerked. "Settle down. Have a few kids. A dog. A fence. You're not getting any younger. You're at that age. And that'll keep your interest. What with all the casual s-" he glanced at Dib and cleared his throat "s-stuff. Ya'know, find yourself a 'career'. Make a family. Grow up." He smirked up at Trec.

Dib had raised his head to look at Dwicky when the man glanced at him. The small slip up Dwicky almost made had him trying to hold back another laugh. He bit his lip to keep himself silent as he kept his eyes on the man, even when Dwicky turned his attention away.

Trec made a face at that and quickly shook his head. "No thanks. You can have your nice little romance with whomever. I'll keep doing what I do. Less hassle that way and no annoying commitment. I won't have to fight with anyone over who gets my stereo system if there was to be a damn divorce." He pouted at that. "I like that stereo system, you know that."

"Yes, sadly, I do. You wouldn't let us forget. You're more committed to that piece of equipment than any known living person." Dwicky sighed and shook his head. "I'm not one for material possessions... except on a sentimental base." He couldn't help but thumb the band of his ring. "I'm pretty content with what I have now." He leaned his head against the swing's chain. "I don't need much else to make me happy. Let alone a large audio base to fill up what hole I'm missing in my life." Dwicky laughed quietly. "...I guess that's why we never worked out. Two totally different people. Hmm, with age I think I've grown much too romantic for my own good." He couldn't help grinning up at Trec. "I really do think I'm ready to give it all up, and settle down. Have a family. But... just a little one." He looked back down at his mood ring, toying with it, the color itself dark blue.

Those words had a small smile coming to Dib's lips. He couldn't help letting his eyes fall to his own ring, toying with the band for a few moments as he stared at the stone before he clutched Skeets to his chest. The plush was cuddled as he continued to toy with his ring, away from prying eyes. He knew how much the small piece of jewelry meant, but with Dwicky's words it suddenly meant even more.

Trec rolled his eyes for a moment as he looked away. "Damn, that's three down. Here I was hoping at least you would stick by my side and stay lonely with me." He turned his attention back on Dwicky, a frown still on his face. "Think of all the fun we used to have and all that you're gonna miss out on because of a ball and chain." He thought about those words for a moment. "Granted, most of the fun stuff happened back in college and we haven't been to a party in years, but, that's not the point." He caught sight of the piece of jewelry which held Dwicky's attention. "Is that a mood ring? Why are you wearing one of those?"

"You'll understand someday, Trec. You'll find him or her in the most unlikely of places, and then ' i bam /i !', you'll be spouting off horribly, disgustingly romantic sentiments too." Dwicky chuckled. "But I guess that'll be the day, eh. Mister-one-night-stand?" He lightly grounded his feet to stop swinging. "This? Just a little something meaningful." He raised his hand up to show it to Trec. "See! I'm happy."

Trec blinked when the stone was held up to his face. "I can see that." He looked past Dwicky's hand and at the other's face instead. "So, one single person is making you act like this?" He couldn't stop the grin that came to his face as he teased Dwicky. "Try and keep them away from me. I don't want to catch it."

Dwicky lowered his hand back down to his lap. "Will be doing. Besides, I'm not one to share anyway." With a small sound he pushed himself to stand from the swing, raising his hands to stretch, leaning back to give his back a good stretch as well. He let his arms back down with a pleased noise. "I have to admit, I did miss seeing you, and the others." He patted Trec's shoulder. "How are they anyway? It feels like forever since I've talked to them."

Dwicky's sudden movement caused Dib to look up. It took him no time in getting off his own swing and walking over to the other, clinging to the man's shirt as he stood by his side. He found no real harm in the action since he used to do it all the time when he was frightened, and wanted any reason he could get to just be near Dwicky.

"No one has changed much." Trec stopped speaking for a second when Dib came up and clung to Dwicky, but just as quickly he went right back to speaking. "I'm the only single one in the group now it seems." He shrugged. "It doesn't bother me. Not to mention everyone has the jobs they wanted. Some of them come by the mall to hang out while I'm working or on break. They usually ask about you sometimes and I had to tell them I didn't know what happened to you."

"Hm. Well now you know." Dwicky grinned. He glanced down at Dib and gently ruffled the boy's hair. "Tell them I say 'hi'. Won't they be shocked to hear I haven't fallen off the face of the planet." He laughed at his own ironies in that statement. "Maybe I'll stop by sometime, though I've got my hands full most of the time. But if I have a free moment to myself, I'll keep it in mind."

"Well, if it's the kid you're worried about you could always bring him along." Trec seemed to think about it for a second. "Although, I guess it's really up to his parents, isn't it?" He shrugged. "Guess you'll just have to find some free time to come and visit whenever you can if that's the case." He smirked. "Not to mention whatever significant other you're hiding away from us." He wagged a finger. "I'll figure you out sooner or later."

"I'm not a kid..." Dib mumbled the words against Dwicky's shirt so they couldn't be heard by Trec. At the rest of the words he continued to cling to Dwicky even more at the thought of being left alone without the other. At least for the moment on the day when he was supposed to have Dwicky to himself.

Dwicky made an amused sound. "We'll see, Trec, we'll see. Anyway, I should get going. I said I'd spend the day with Dib here, and from the looks of things I think he's getting impatient with me." He petted the boy's head and looked back at his old friend. "It was definitely nice seeing you after so long. Sorry I didn't call you guys after I got back. I've been so busy. But feel free to send me a line, number's still the same."

Trec sighed, but a smile came to his face as he nodded his head. "Fine, alright. I was supposed to be picking up a few things anyway and got completely side tracked." He moved away from the swing set and raised one hand to wave at them both. "Talk to you later, Dwicky. Bye, Dib." With that he turned to make his way out of the park and head back into the city.

Dib kept his eyes on Trec until the man was completely out of sight. Only then did he finally pull back from Dwicky and look up at the other with a tiny smile on his face. "I think your friend missed you." It was stating the obvious, but it was funny at the same time. He couldn't help it.

"Hmmm. Seemed so. Trecky always was the social, out-going one of us all. I was always far too realistic he'd complain." Dwicky shrugged as he scratched the back of his head, ruffling his own hair. He smiled down at Dib. "It was nice to see him. I'd forget to be social if he didn't drop by just now. Heh, but he's a nice guy. Still just as out going and immature as he was years ago in college." Dwicky rested his hand affectionately on Dib's head.

Dib closed his eyes for a second at the contact before he turned his attention once more up to Dwicky. "He's very interested in your love life too." A playful grin came to his lips. He moved out from under Dwicky's hand, making sure it was safe enough before he took hold of that same hand and kissed the man's palm. After the action, Dib let go so he could walk over to pick up the bag from the store. "Will you keep him guessing or let him know that he already met me?" The answer was obvious, but Dib was having fun and he still couldn't keep the grin off his face as he turned back around to face Dwicky.

"Heh, yea, for someone who isn't interested in relationships for himself he sure likes to pry into other's." Dwicky looked down at his palm that Dib kissed and took the boy's question into actual thought. He slowly flexed his fingers, touching his fingertips onto his palm before stretching them out. "Well for one thing it's none of his business... for two... I'm not really sure." Closing his hand he lowered it to his side. "No offense, but I think the age gap would weird him out. Hmm." Dwicky tried to picture bringing Dib to the mall to introduce him to his old friends, hanging out; it didn't go over well. He shook his head and finally turned to look at Dib.

The grin fell away from Dib's face at the look on Dwicky's own. He was silent for a little bit before he spoke up again, no longer playful. "It would probably weird out anyone, but friends are supposed to listen to you and understand you." He gave a small smile. "At least that's what I hoped for whenever I was able to find friends." He walked up to Dwicky until he stopped in front of the man and with his free hand took the other's in his own. He let a finger trace the stone that was in Dwicky's own ring as he went on speaking. "You want to see that guy and the rest of your friends again, right? If that's the case I could always go home after Skool instead of coming over." He tried to actually seem okay with the idea. "Since they would probably think it's weird of me to hang around you all the time."

Dwicky's hand slipped from Dib's to raise up, fingers took Dib's chin raising the boy's head up. "You're more important to me than a few stupid college friends." He didn't bother to glance around as he placed a quick kiss on the boy's lips. "Besides, your sister is a demon and no company anyone would want." He brushed his thumb across Dib's cheek and gave a small smile of his own. "If anything, I can visit them while you're at skool. Which you _will_ finally be going to tomorrow." Dwicky straightened. "I rather have you brushing me off for friends than the other way around."

The smile returned to Dib's face and he seemed to feel much better after Dwicky's words. "I wouldn't do that to you. I enjoy every minute I get to be with you." He gave a small laugh. "I'll probably make friends and lose them just as quickly, considering I'd much rather just be with you-- which I really wouldn't regret in the slightest." He bounced on his feet as the thought of Skool started to excite him once more. "I'm going to have a lot to tell you when I get home tomorrow. Since I'll actually be able to go to Skool, I'll have a lot to talk about."

"Such priorities." Dwicky tsked. "But I can't wait to finally hear about a proper day at skool. I'm sure you'll have many a story to tell me, and all the best gossip." He grinned some. "But don't worry about me. Take as long as you need to do whatever you need. Go play video games with friends or study with friends or, uh, whatever it is that kids are doing now-a-days." He tugged very gently on a lock of Dib's hair. "I'll still be here when you get home. I'll even pick you up if you need a ride home." Dwicky smoothed the boy's hair back with a grin. "Take advantage of my bountiful generosity."

"I'd like that." Dib let his one hand fall to grab onto Dwicky's own so he could link their fingers together. "If I'm going to be coming to your house after Skool most of the time, then I wouldn't mind if you picked me up." A small grin came to his lips before he went on. "As long as you're offering, why not? You'll have to be careful, though. After a while you might get sick of me, considering how often I'll be over. I might never want to go home. You may just have to kick me out." He laughed a little.

"Quite the other way around. I won't want to give you up. I'll oh so very conveniently forget to drive you home and just drag you into bed." Dwicky grinned. "Then you'll really be in trouble because then I'll never let you go." He touched Dib's cheek with his free hand. "I'll just want to cuddle, touch and kiss you all day. And neither of us will get anything done that way."

"Not necessarily a bad thing." Dib lifted their hands up and kissed Dwicky's knuckles. He dropped their hands between them after the kiss and looked up at Dwicky as he went on. "Of course you're right, I wouldn't get any Skool work done that way. I'd have to come up with so many excuses as to why I keep skipping out on my home work, and there's only so many times I can say a dog ate my paper before it just won't work."

"Hmmm." Dwicky leaned down, lazily stroking the boy's cheek with a thumb. "How about: 'My tall, dark and horribly sexy older boyfriend demanded my attentions _all_ night' ?" He kissed the boy's lips but found he couldn't pull away until he'd stolen two more kisses after that. "That might work. I'm sure your teachers would understand that."

Dib couldn't help blushing a bit at the words. Even so, they didn't stop the small grin that found it's way back on his face. "Yes, I'm sure they'll be just fine with that excuse. It wouldn't bother them in the slightest." He let go of Dwicky's hand so he could raise his own back up, pulling Dwicky back down so he could press a longer kiss to the other's lips. It felt so good to be able to do such things out in the open, that Dib couldn't help smiling behind the kiss.

"I love you..." Dwicky spoke up after. "And I love being with you outside. Doing things with you like any other couple does, just spending time, going out. I like this. I like just being with you outside of what we do and what we are." He brushed a lonely finger across Dib's bottom lip. "...I just thought I'd say that."

The words caused Dib to smile a bit more. "I love you." He pressed a kiss to Dwicky's finger. "I love you, I love you, I love you." Each time he spoke the three words he pressed another quick kiss to Dwicky's finger. Once he was done, Dib pulled Dwicky near by his shirt so he could bury his face in the fabric, nuzzling his face near Dwicky's chest. "Thank you for so much." The words were muffled, but still heard.

It had Dwicky grinning wide with a chuckle. "Oh yea?" He threw his arms around the boy for a tight hug, smothering his face and hair, anything he could get at with kisses. "Well, _I_ love _you_ too!" Then without warning he scooped Dib up in his arms and spun him around with a laugh.

Dib gave a loud squeak at the sudden action, but it quickly turned into a laugh. He used his free hand to hug tightly around Dwicky's neck. Even through his laughter he couldn't help moving forward to press his lips against the other's once more, having to pull back just as quickly because he couldn't keep himself quiet.

Dwicky staggered back dizzy, almost falling over. He gave another laugh, blinking hard to shake the vertigo. He tried to place a quick kiss on Dib's lips but missed entirely; after a few tries he finally found his mark.

Dib moved his hand around to place it on Dwicky's cheek as the kiss continued. When he pulled back he kept his hand right where it was, but let his fingers trace a small heart on Dwicky's skin. A few more quiet laughs escaped him until he was finally silent and he leaned forward to press his forehead against Dwicky's own, wanting to keep the close contact.

Dwicky smiled but seemed to lose his footing anyway and toppled over onto the grass with an 'oof!', Dib cushioned atop. He stayed splayed on his back and gave a breathless laugh. "Not as young as I used to be."

Dib laughed a bit at those words as he cuddled up to Dwicky. Everything he had been holding was set aside on the grass so he could wrap his arms around Dwicky's neck while resting his head down on the man's chest. "I don't think I'll mind four years much at all anymore. I know we still have to be careful, but right now things just feel normal and I really like it."

Dwicky raised a hand to mess with the boy's hair, spending a quick moment to catch his breath. "Normal is good. I like normal. Normal is normal is normal." He gave a light hearted laugh at that. "We've come a long way, no, i you've /i come a long way, Dib. It's amazing. It truly is. This is amazing. I am amazed!" He sat up for a brief moment with a grunt to plant a kiss atop the boy's head as best he could before flopping back down, lax on the ground. " 'Mazing."

The small bit of praise and quick kiss caused Dib to blush a bit. He wasn't used to so much of it, but he wasn't about to protest to any of it, either. "I feel a lot better now. I don't have anymore fear or worry and you're still with me." He buried his face closer to Dwicky's chest at those words and allowed his eyes to close. "I'm just focused on what I should have been focused on this entire time. So now I'm happy with how everything is and how it's going to be."

"Good." Dwicky nodded, his eyes went skyward though there was barely a cloud to look at. "Good, I'm glad. I think... for once… I may just stop worrying and relax." He chuckled. "Maybe. Things aren't so bad now. In fact, pretty close to perfect. Why ruin it. Why topple over and shatter what we've built up." He let his eyes fall close. "If I could just freeze this. Keep everything like this… so that when something goes wrong I could just come back and start over from this point again." His voice drifted as he went on "...Just keep this."

"To keep this one point in time, I'd like that as well." Dib lifted his head so he could glance down at Dwicky. He moved a hand up from around the other's neck and began to run it through Dwicky's hair as he continued speaking. "I'm sure there will be more times just like this one. We'll be able to enjoy ourselves like this whenever we want." He moved up a bit and placed a kiss on the other's lips, despite the fact Dwicky had his eyes closed. "At home, outside, wherever. As long as I'm with you."

Dwicky peeked an eye open and gave a lazy grin. "That's quite the romantic sentiment." He ruffled Dib's hair with a chuckle. "Especially for someone so young." he teased.

Dib grinned at those words and couldn't help but tease back. "I learn from the best." He moved his other hand up to grab onto Dwicky's own, linking their fingers together and letting them drop to the man's chest. "Either way, I meant it." He placed another kiss on Dwicky's lips, letting it linger much longer than the last one.

"Mmm. Fine, I'll agree, I'm a romantic fool. But," Dwicky moved his free hand to trail a few fingers across cheek "I have good reason to." He gave a smile. "At least I think so."

Dib leaned into the touch and gave a small smile of his own. "Well, as long as you're only a romantic fool for me." He couldn't help but to continue with his teasing. "I don't mind hearing loving words on a daily basis. Not one bit, actually." He looked down at their hands and toyed with the ring on Dwicky's finger. "But even without them, I still know that you love me."

Dwicky smiled softly at that, stroking his fingers against Dib's cheek. He chuckled, though very quietly. "When did you become so sweet?" he spoke the question rhetorically.

Dib looked up at Dwicky. For a few moments he stayed silent before a small grin came to his face. "Hmm, maybe it was the toast I had this morning. It might have done something to make me this way." His other hand moved away from Dwicky's hair to trail down the man's neck and towards his chest, walking along as he continued to speak. "Maybe we'll just have to eat there more often."

"'Special toast', that's new. But I'll have to agree." Dwicky turned his head to get a better look at Dib, his smile softening, almost sadly, placing his hand back on Dib's cheek. "Your cheeks are still warm... Anyone ever say you're horribly adorable when you blush?" He stroked the boy's cheek with a thumb. "When you do anything." He smiled a little more.

Those words only caused the blush to come back to Dib's cheeks. He shook his head and averted his eyes for a moment. "Not really." He finally turned his attention back to Dwicky and gave a small smile. "You would be the first." He raised a brow and couldn't help the curious look that came over his face. "Anything, hmm?" He couldn't help grinning, despite how shy he had suddenly become.

Dwicky nodded in agreement. "Anything and everything." His brows furrowed in good humour. "Despite whatever lewd thing your mind has just come up with." He still continued to stroke Dib's cheek.

Dib lifted his free hand to place it on his chest. "Lewd? I'd never think such thoughts." He shook his head and turned his eyes away. "I'm offended, really." He tried his best to keep a straight face through his words.

"Then what was it you were thinking?" Dwicky's brows rose as he grinned, giving Dib a skeptical look. He took the boy's chin, making him look at him.

Dib continued to try his best and look innocent, but it just wasn't working. Even the tone of his voice began to give it away after a few moments. "Oh, nothing. Just normal everyday things. Really." He smiled sweetly.

"Right. Of course. How could I think such things about such a dear innocent boy as Dib." Dwicky tucked Dib's hair back with the hand that had been at his cheek. "He's a saint. As pristine as the elements themselves. Pure of heart and pure of mind, he is above such things as lewd thoughts." Dwicky gave a mock sad sigh, shaking his head. "Unlike me, a poor old man who still divulges in the sins of the mind and flesh. It's too late for me to transcend like you, Dib." He sighed dramatically. "Too bad... my bed will be so lonely now."

"Oh, I don't know." Dib leaned down a bit to touch their noses together. "I'm sure it wouldn't hurt for me to be a little sinful every once in a while." He gave a quick lick to Dwicky's lips then pulled back just enough to speak again. "Just so you won't be lonely." He grinned.

Dwicky couldn't help but lick his own lips after the action. "How giving, that you would grace a seedy old man your presence." He pressed a quick kiss to Dib's lips, but couldn't pull away to speak until he pressed a lingering one. "Though, for some reason, I don't think you're as innocent a boy as you let on." He couldn't keep the grinning perk of lips subdued.

Dib gave a mock pout at those words. He tried his best to seem hurt before he spoke up. "What would make you say such a thing?" He pulled away a bit to sit up once more, looking down at the man. "Of course I'm innocent. Name one thing that would prove otherwise."

Dwicky gave a catty expression "_Cake_."

That caused Dib to snap his mouth shut pretty quickly. His face went red once more and he tried his best to hide it by averting his eyes, but it didn't work very well. He opened his mouth to speak, but all that came out was a small embarrassed noise before he quickly closed it again.

"Must have been good cake too." Dwicky patted Dib's thigh, amusement plain on his face as he tried to mock seriousness. "For you did have seconds." He chuckled low in his throat, rubbing the boy's thigh to sooth his embarrassment.

The touches relaxed Dib and he turned his attention back on Dwicky. He gave a small shy smile before he leaned back down to place a kiss on the other's lips. "It was _very_ good cake. I can't wait until I can have more." He nibbled on Dwicky's bottom lip for a quick second then pulled away with a grin.

Dwicky tsked. "Gluttony is a sin. And a sin isn't innocent." He still grinned up at Dib. "But I forgive you, thus you are absolved of your sins and you are chaste once more." He laughed and shook his head at the situation. "Until we have more cake, that is." He ran his hand up higher Dib's inner thigh.

Dib gave a soft moan at the action and let his arm slip back around Dwicky's neck. "Then I'll worry over my innocence when the time comes." He squirmed around a bit on top of the other, grinning as he did. "Maybe sooner than later." He pressed a kiss to Dwicky's chin, giving a quick lick to the goatee before he spoke up again, his voice a bit more serious. "I love you."

Dwicky kissed what he could, which was Dib's brow. "I love you too." He ran a few fingers through the boy's hair before he rested his hands on the boy's back. A little while after he craned his neck back to blink at the pair of eyes that were staring at them from the far park bench. "Uh oh... I think we're making a spectacle... the old folks are staring."

Those words caused Dib to turn his head back as best he could and look behind him. Sure enough Dwicky was right and the stares had Dib hurrying to scramble off the man and back to his feet. The worry over the past few days came back to him for a split second and he tried his best to act as casual as he could, but their position probably hadn't helped them. Instead, he leaned over to pick up his things from the grass, glancing over to the two at the bench for a split second after.

Dwicky, on the other hand, took his time; straightening his shirt and sitting up with a grunt. "It's alright. They're near sighted." He stood up and dusted the grass off his back and pants. "But I was starting to get a cramp anyway." He ruffled Dib's hair as if that would abolish the boy's worry. "Don't worry, the worst they could do is throw bread crumbs at you. Mmm, and then look upset you aren't pecking away at it." He gave a small laugh.

Dib calmed down a bit and couldn't help laughing as well. He kept his eyes on the people for a few more minutes before he turned his attention back on Dwicky and used his free hand to tug on the man's arm. "Come on, let's go back into the city. I want to see if I can mooch off of you a bit more." He teased while grinning at Dwicky.

Dwicky obeyed the tug, taking the boy's hand as they walked from their spot on the grass. He shook his head and snorted in amusement at Dib's last comment, but it was true enough. "Sure. What would you like to do next on our date, hm?"

Dib thought over the question as he lead the both of them away from the park and back on the sidewalk. "I'm not really sure. There were a few stores we passed by that had some things I sort of wanted. I could always pick the stuff up later, though." Once they were completely away from the park, Dib took Dwicky's arm and wrapped it around his shoulders, linking their fingers near his chest. "We could always go to a movie or go to that fancy laser tag place that's somewhere in the city. I can't really remember."

"I don't know what kids are doing anymore. Funny considering I used to work in counseling them. It was mostly: 'my life sucks', 'everyone hates me', 'mommy doesn't hug me enough', 'daddy hugs me too much', 'skool smells'." Dwicky gave a sly grin down at Dib. "It's too bad you're underage, night clubs can be pretty entertaining. Dancing like you just don't care because everyone else is probably just that much more hammered than you." He gave Dib's shoulders a gentle one arm squeeze as his grin widened. "And I'd love to see you dance."

Dib glanced up at Dwicky and raised a brow. "Hammered, huh?" He shook his head while hiding a small laugh. His eyes moved back ahead of them while he spoke up again. "I don't know about any of that, but it doesn't mean I can't dance." He blinked. "Well, I don't even know if I can dance." He shrugged his shoulders. "It doesn't mean I have to go to a nightclub to try, though." He turned his eyes back to Dwicky and gave a small smile.

Dwicky laughed. "So then, where is it sober kids go to dance? Oh wait, don't skools have dances? With stupid and corny themes like 'beach party', 'hay-ho downs', 'Christmas' and 'the prom'? There's a place to try. Right in front of your peers. Wiggle and writhe for their viewing pleasure. Make a lasting impression." Dwicky stifled his laughter into his free hand.

Dib nudged Dwicky in the side with his elbow. "Yeah, I'm sure they would enjoy that very much." He eyed Dwicky for a moment before he shook his head and looked ahead again. "No, I think I'll save the wiggling and writhing just for you." He grinned.

"Mmmm, and I prefer it that way." Dwicky nodded with a grin of his own. "But still, that shouldn't stop you from dancing. Just not the wiggly writhy kind. Though, if I remember skool, way way way way way back, the girls would be on one side of the gym and the boys on the other." He snickered. "But you should go to the dances at your skool. It should be fun."

"I guess so." Dib seemed to think about it for a few seconds. He glanced at Dwicky out the corner of his eyes and smiled a bit. "If I'm lucky I'll be able to drag you along as a chaperone and sneak a dance in with you. It would be boring without you there."

"M-me? At a skool dance? I think that would make the teachers wonder why you're bringing your counselor to skool, less I'm introduced as something less conspicuous like... uh... uhhh... a wall or a prop." Dwicky laughed nervously. "Hmm. But there _is_ one dance I'll be able to take you to that no one will be able to question. Because you won't be seeing anyone there at your skool again, and it won't matter that you'll be dancing with an old man." Dwicky grinned widely at that.

Dib thought over those words for a moment and it slowly dawned on him what the other meant. "The prom?" The thought seemed to shock him for a moment, having never even thought about such a thing, ever. "You'd go with me to my prom?" Dib tried his best not to seem as excited as he really felt, but it was hard when such a small thing meant a lot to him.

"Of course! Tuxes, corsages, limo, the whole nine yards. Maybe even sneak a little wine or champagne in later on in the night." Dwicky gave the hand that held his a squeeze, thumbing the boy's knuckles. "We'd have a lot to celebrate along with your graduation. A big, new beginning for the both of us." Dwicky leaned over to press his lips near Dib's ear to speak briefly with a grin "Besides, I'm sure you'll be just that much more lickable in a tux."

Dib grinned as well before turning his head to press a kiss on Dwicky's cheek. "Now I have something else to look forward to." He leaned closer to Dwicky as they kept walking, holding tighter to the man's hand. "I wish it wasn't so far away. I'm really anxious now." He glanced back at Dwicky and couldn't keep the smile off of his face. "We'll be able to do anything and have no worries. That includes dancing in front of a room full of my classmates and more than likely a few friends." He couldn't help laughing at that.

"Mm. But best of all-" Dwicky took a quick glance around. "This." With a new sly grin he pressed a quick kiss to the boy's lips. "In public. Much to the chagrin of your class mates, friends, teachers and old folks in parks."

Dib gave a small noise, happy with the kiss. The words caused him to laugh once again and he shrugged as he kept his eyes on Dwicky. "They'll get used to it, I'm sure. Either that or they'll have to, because once we're able to, I plan to take full advantage of it." He gave a sly smile before turning his attention back ahead of them.

Dwicky laughed some. "I can only imagine." He shook his head at that. "Things won't stay very chaste very long if you take _full_ advantage. Maybe just a little advantage." With his free hand he pressed his pointer and thumb together in gesture of 'little'. "At least save the full on advantage for the limo. Then I'll have you all to myself, in the classiest back seat money can buy." He chuckled low in his throat as he then nibbled the tip of Dib's ear.

Dib leaned into the small bites and let out a pleased sound at the same time. "Fine, we'll do it your way. Your reasoning is hard to argue with." He let go of Dwicky's hand only to raise his own up and bury it in the man's hair, letting his fingers trail down slowly and play with the other's earring.

Dwicky murmured something but he was too busy petering kisses from Dib's ear down his cheek to get to his mouth. It wasn't the safest thing to do, considering what had just happened it was close to throwing their victories out the window. But Dwicky couldn't help it, he wanted the years to be up and to do what he was always promising Dib. He glanced and noticed the spaces between the buildings that would give them cover, but it had something sinking in Dwicky to have to degrade Dib to hiding their affections in a dirty alley. Dwicky straightened, just noticing some passers-by nearing. "...Sometimes I wish it wasn't." Dwicky let his hands fall to Dib's shoulders but it just didn't feel plutonic enough, so he let them fall back to his sides as the people walked by.

The sudden loss of contact disappointed Dib for a moment, but when he realized why he let his own hand fall back down to his side as well. He watched as the people passed them and even after they were gone he kept his hand where it was while letting his eyes fall to the sidewalk below them.

"Dib…?" Dwicky quietly spoke up, but his gaze seemed to be else where like Dib's. "Can I ask you something? Hypothetically. A hypothetical question... just... hypothetical." He raised a hand to rub the back of his neck, glancing at some building that suddenly became very interesting.

The words caught Dib's attention and had him looking back up at Dwicky. "Sure, I guess." He blinked and quickly shook his head. "I mean, yeah, go ahead. What is it?"

"How long would you wait for this? I mean, 'us'. I mean- could you wait to be together?" Dwicky shook his head and ran a hand through his hair as he furrowed his brows. "No, that's not right. A hiatus. A relationship hiatus, until things are okay." He tentatively looked at Dib. "Until...-until what we do can't be used against us." He combed the hair on the back of his head with his fingers, the need to fidget wouldn't stop. "What do you think? Er-wait, that's not hypothetical question." Dwicky tried not to frown. "Yea... what if?" That question was more hypothetical.

The questions caused Dib's eyes to widen bit by bit as he kept them on Dwicky. When the man was finished speaking, Dib quickly looked back down to think over what was asked. He had to keep reminding himself that the questions were only 'what ifs' just like Dwicky had said. There was no reason to get upset. It still took him a while to answer, his voice quiet when he did. "I would wait." His hand clutched the bag he held tighter as he brought Skeets closer to him. "It would hurt, but I would wait until we can actually be together." His eyes fell lower.

A hand rested atop Dib's head, stoic but in a comforting way. "…It wouldn't be too hard on you..." Dwicky paused, licking his lips which suddenly felt too dry "…would it?" he very quietly continued.

Even the one simple touch couldn't really comfort Dib. He found it hard to find words and had to keep silent for a bit longer before he finally shook his head. "N-No. I guess not." He shook his head a bit, but even after, continued to keep his eyes down. "I'd be fine."

Dwicky stood still after Dib spoke. His hand fell from atop the boy's head to his chin, taking it to raise Dib's gaze back up. His voice was barely a whisper "Please be honest with me." His brows furrowed just a little. "It's important to us."

Those words grabbed Dib's attention completely and had him keeping his eyes on Dwicky's face. Even as the worry came back in his expression, Dib didn't once avert his eyes. "It..." His voice shook and he had to stop before actually going on to try and control it. "It would hurt, a lot." He swallowed hard, trying not to sound choked up. "To have to wait again when I finally have you would hurt more this time around." He finally looked away even though Dwicky had a hold on his chin. "Even if it would be best, I'd just want to be with you."

Dwicky's hand moved to finally rest at Dib's shoulder, though the boy didn't look at him he still kept his eyes on Dib. "...Do you think we should?" he quietly went on, giving the boy's shoulder a small squeeze. "Would it be for the better?"

Dib continued to keep his gaze away even after the questions were asked. It took him a while to actually answer, his voice still just as quiet. "Everything has been so perfect today. At least I thought so." His eyes fell to the sidewalk. "It was just like we wanted. To be out together and not worry about anything else." He thumbed the ring on his finger for a few seconds before continuing on. "For once everything is okay." He finally turned his eyes back on Dwicky. A small frown on his face. "I'm okay with the way things are. I'm completely happy for once." He dropped his gaze back down. "But... it all depends on what you think."

"There's still plenty to worry about... Every pair of eyes is just another witness. And who knows just who will be walking where at what time." Dwicky shook his head, taking his hand back from Dib's shoulder to rake it through his own hair. "...I don't know what I'm thinking anymore." He tugged his hand free of his hair and grimaced as he wiggled the dark strands free of his fingers. "And I'm shedding, how charming and attractive."

Dib smiled sadly at those words, but the expression quickly fell as he looked back down below him. He continued to stay silent for much longer, thinking over Dwicky's earlier words. Finally, he spoke up again while bringing Skeets even closer to his chest. "I guess I've just been trying so hard not to worry about it anymore. I'm sorry it's still bothering you so much." He looked past Dwicky at the building behind, but wasn't really focused on it at all. "I just thought we would try not to worry about anyone else at all. Sorry..."

Dwicky straightened. "No, no don't be sorry. You shouldn't be worrying, you've been doing the smart thing. The worry is my job. That's what I'm paid for, to straighten out a person's problems and guide them to a proper choice. 'Counselor is just a fancy title for 'someone whose down to earth that worries for you'." He shook his head and then his hands. "It was just a question, just, just--- just a thought." he murmured as he turned to start walking again.

Dib turned his attention to Dwicky as the man walked away. The words still left him a little upset, but he tried his best not to let it show as he turned to catch up to the other. He kept silent as he moved his hand out, taking Dwicky's in to his own as they walked down the street.


	36. Sessions 36

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 36

It was just another day, which only meant more work for everyone who lived their lives in the city. Only few were allowed the luxury of sleeping in few days out of the year and for once Trec thought it was going to be one of those days for him. Not so, apparently. As luck would have it, his phone decided it would be nice and ring over and over until he picked it up. He had been ready to say a few choice words to whoever was on the other line, but when he heard exactly who it was, Trec shut up immediately and agreed to what was said.

It was the only reason he was up instead of catching up on rest that he thought he surely needed. He had moved through his mess of an apartment, kicking papers and cans aside to get to the kitchen and fix, at the most, a quick five minute meal while he waited for his visitor to show up. Once all was said and done, he stood leaning against a counter, eating microwaved mac and cheese which had been left over from some other time while listening out for the door.

The sound of approaching footsteps was easy to hear, but the knock at the door seemed to have been delayed. It seemed as if the visitor outside was hesitant to do so. Whoever it was also seemed to be debating being there at all, complete with a silent inner monologue of why they were there and how they shouldn't have and just how out of their mind they were for following through on this.

Finally, after a good long moment, there came a rather meek knock on the door.

It was the footsteps which had Trec setting his bowl aside, but he waited until he actually heard the knock at the door. The long wait caused him raise a brow in a bit of wonder over what could be taking so long. When the sound finally came, Trec took no time in walking to the door, having to go through the same obstacles he had to, to get through the kitchen. He let out a small curse as he hit his foot on the coffee table before moving to unlock the door and opening it up for his visitor. "Took you long enough."

Dwicky stared at Trec for a long moment before glancing around the halls, as if he were expecting something to leap out and bite him. He fidgeted a moment, staying where he was. He quickly pointed down the hall where he came. "I really should be going-- I left the microwave on --and the tub and the toaster and the uh… toilet. Yea. So I should leave now and go turn those off and- uh… yeaa."

"No way." Trec grabbed onto Dwicky's arm before he could escape and pulled the other into the messy apartment. "You called me for a reason. I'm sure your toilet will survive a little longer without you." He closed the door once Dwicky was completely inside, letting go of the other at the same time. "I refuse to be woken up at ten in the morning on my day off for nothing."

Dwicky opened his mouth to retort about his poor forsaken toilet but he stepped in something crunchy. He glanced down and blinked. "Uh.. Trec, you have an empty pie plate on the floor." He blinked looking again. "And several tupperware containers... and cracker boxes... and cheesy snack bags... and an electric pencil sharpener in the hall?" Dwicky raised his brows as he looked back to Trec. "Not only are you still as lazy as you were three years ago, you've some how evolved into an even worse slob." He rubbed the back of his head. "I didn't think that was possible. But- the proof lies before me." He went back to fidgeting again. "Let me clean up for you-- oh! But I left my special, one-of-a-kind, laminated and autographed broom at home. I should go fetch it! It'll be just a second!"

Trec blocked the door, leaning his back against it while shaking his head. "That's okay. I'll deal with the mess myself at some point, Mother." He pushed away from the door and moved his hands out, placing them on Dwicky's shoulder to lead the other man towards the living room. "Why don't you try and relax. What's the matter with you, anyway? Why so jumpy?" When they were near the couch, Trec moved away from Dwicky and cleared off a couple of papers from the cushions to make room for at least Dwicky. "You call me and want to come over to talk and now suddenly you want to leave just as quickly."

"Aside from the fact I've had at least fifteen cups of coffee since seven in the morning; nothing, nothing." Dwicky looked at the couch and frowned, shaking his head with a tsk. "That couch doesn't look very sanitary. Maybe I should get it dry cleaned. Oh-! I should hand wash the pillows." He snatched up one of the pillows, fluffing it between two hands. "Yea. Got any _bleach_?" He smiled much too wide and enthusiastically, it looked like a crooked carved-in edge across his face.

"You're being creepy and high strung." Trec placed his hands on Dwicky's shoulders once again and forced the other to sit down on the couch. "Try and settle down." He snatched the pillow back from Dwicky and narrowed his eyes on the other man. "And stop worrying over my apartment. You know I hate that." He threw the pillow aside and crossed his arms.

Dwicky fidgeted on his lap. "I'm not creepy." he murmured in a little voice. But finally he gave in and his shoulders slumped, head falling in defeat. "But... you win. I- I- just- there's no one else, and I can't keep all of this alone. A rock needs a rock too. I can't do this for four years. I can't, not when every little thing that goes wrong makes me want to break down right there. I almost did!" Dwicky buried his face in his hands and groaned. "What am I doing? I can't drag you into this. I can't tell you. You'll think I'm crazy. Everyone always thought I was crazy!" Dwicky balled his hands into fists. "I'm NOT crazy goddamnit!" Suddenly the anger drained from as if someone pulled the plug on his emotions. "My god- it's finally happened. I've lost my mind." He slumped back on the couch, limp, staring at nothing. "Have any coffee?" He glanced at Trec, almost casually.

Trec stared at Dwicky with wide eyes, not exactly expecting such an outburst from the other. "Um… I don't think you need anymore." He shook his head and raised a hand to scratch at his arm. "What in the world are you going on about, Dwicky? You're just sort of talking nonsense right now and not really making… any sense. Drag me into what, exactly? And what about four years?" He raised a brow. "What's making you so crazy?" He smirked at that.

Dwicky grabbed another throw pillow and plopped it on his face to smother it in. He groaned again. "Nothing" came the muffled reply "Absolutely nothing." He fell over on the couch, despite the mess.

Trec rolled his eyes. "Yeah, sure, whatever. I'll just completely ignore that small little breakdown you had just seconds ago on my couch." He walked away from the couch to take the short walk back to the kitchen and grabbed his food he had discarded for the door. "Problems don't just disappear. That's one of the things they taught us in college, remember?" He mumbled a few words under his breath after. "I know it's still drilled in _my_ head, at least."

"Yes'sir." Dwicky muttered under the pillow. "Problems need to be dissected. Find the root, solve the problem." He turned over but still buried his face back in the pillow. "Yea, well... you spent most of class face down in your text book with a brook of drool cascading from your mouth." He huffed, but he knew Trec was right.

"Not all the time." Trec walked back into the living room only to narrow his eyes on Dwicky. "Only on the days I felt what was being taught wasn't really all that important." He shrugged a shoulder. "So I failed some tests, oh well." He pointed at Dwicky, despite the pillow covering the other's face. "That's not the point. The point is you're cracking over something." After those words he turned his attention back to his food.

"It's called pressure, Mister Trec!" Dwicky snorted as he chucked the pillow at his friend. After he rolled on his back and rubbed his face thoroughly. "Mph. To put it in blunt words that even you can understand: 'I've fucked up big time'." He let his arms flopped above his head. "At least in the eyes of society." He scoffed. "Alright, Mister Master of Counseling, fix my troubled mind and show me some guidance." He blew his hair from his eyes with a heavy sigh.

Trec had ducked and let the pillow sail over his head. As soon as it was clear, he straightened up and couldn't help smirking at Dwicky's words. "Well, it depends on if you want to be locked in an employee closet." He shrugged and made his way over to sit on the end of the couch. "But, if you insist. I shall try and fix you as best I can." He looked down inside his bowl, poking at his food as he continued speaking. "First you need to tell me why exactly it is you 'fucked up.'"

Dwicky rested his arm over his eyes as he let a smirk cross his features. "That's the beauty of it. I can't."

Trec turned his eyes back on Dwicky at those words. A confused expression came over his face and for a few moments he stayed silent before he rolled his eyes and looked back down. "Then how do you expect me to help you if you can't tell me anything? What did you do? Kill someone?" He was obviously joking.

"You'd call me crazy, and you'd probably think less of me. And I can't risk you telling anyone else... especially our group." Dwicky covered his face with his other arm too. "I'm so deep in this, it's not funny. If you _really_ knew... you'd disown me as a friend. I can't believe I came here. Three years I fell off the planet and I expect you to let me dump my problems on you and be fine with it." Dwicky sat up with a grunt, rubbing his forehead. "I _must_ be insane."

"Wow, it must be something serious." The amusement was gone from Trec's voice as he said the words. He watched Dwicky as the other man moved around. After a few moments, he set his bowl aside and leaned back against the arm of the couch. "Anything you say here I swear not to tell the others. Think of it as one of those confidentiality things we're supposed to have." He looked away, turning his attention to the mess on the floor. "We've dumped our problems on each other for as long as we've known each other. Why stop now? I have to admit, I was a bit annoyed you didn't keep in touch, but it doesn't mean I want you to suffer with whatever you're going through." He turned his attention back on the other.

Dwicky slowly looked back to Trec, his brows furrowed, creasing his forehead with worry. "Promise me you won't. Promise me you won't tell _anyone_, Trec. This is heavy, heavier than anything we've ever dumped on each other." He shook his head, his gaze falling down to his mood ring, toying with it on his finger. "I didn't know who else to confide in." He gave such a weak shrug. "You were the most open minded of us all..."

Trec's eyes fell down to the ring Dwicky had become so attached to lately. He stayed silent once again before he moved his eyes back up and nodded his head. "You have my word." He leaned forward a bit, trying to get a better look at Dwicky's face. "What's all this about, man?"

Dwicky paled, the words didn't want to come out. He'd gone for so long keeping it to himself, he didn't need another incident like he had with Tak and Gaz. But Trec was a long time friend; that made things better, right? He swallowed hard, feeling cold all over. He didn't look at Trec when he finally spoke, his admitted words barely breathed out "…I'm involved with a client."

Trec blinked his eyes at that. He was expecting something much more shocking than what he was just told. "That's all? You're freaking out because you're going out with one of your clients?" He leaned back and rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, Dwicky, that's nothing. I mean sure, you could get in a little trouble, but it's not as bad as you're making it out to be."

"_Seriously_ involved." Dwicky quietly corrected. He raised his gaze enough to give Trec a somber look that let the other know it was much more than just 'dating', before his gaze fell back down to his ring.

That shut Trec up, and once again he stayed silent for a bit. It took him a bit longer to finally speak up again and when he did he shrugged his shoulders. "So you have a heavy relationship with someone, so what? As soon as they're no longer your client you don't have to worry about the boundaries anymore." He raised a brow, suddenly confused. "I thought you were happy about whatever relationship you were talking about yesterday. Now suddenly you're worried about something you really don't need to be?

Dwicky pressed his fingertips together, steepling his pointer fingers as he bowed his brow to rest upon them. "…He's fourteen." Dwicky almost didn't finish in a shaky voice that almost cracked.

Trec stared at Dwicky with wide eyes for what felt like forever. His whole body went rigid and his mouth hung open in shock. Finally, he let out a shaky laugh and raised a hand to scratch the inside of his ear with a finger. "Wow... um... could you repeat that. I think my brain just leaked out of my ear."

Dwicky grated his teeth tightly before he just snapped. "He's fourteen! Fourteen, Trec! FOURTEEN!" He pushed himself up from the couch to pace, kicking whatever garbage that was in his way to do so. "I am sleeping with a fourteen year-old patient of mine! Happy!? You prick!" Dwicky pointed sharply at his friend. "Want to hear something else that's 'fucked up', I love him! I really, sincerely _love_ him! With every fiber of my mortal flesh and soul I want to spend the rest of my messed up life with him. I want to pull him out of his wretched little life where everyone keeps putting him down and dumping their emotional constipation on him. I want him to be happy, because that makes me happy." Dwicky raked his fingers through his hair, clawing at his skull, as if that would make sense of anything. "You want me to put a cherry on this little 'shit' sundae? I came back here to this city because of him. I came back for _him_. I left him, Trec, I left him in such a mess-- I had to get him out of there." Dwicky shook, with laughter or sobs it was hard to tell. "He was _dying_ in there." His hands fell heavily back to his sides as he shook his head. "I barely knew him for one day three years ago, and now... I can't live without him. I'm hooked. It's too intense." His head fell heavily again, the energy drained from his bones and he rubbed his temple. "I'm as loony as he is."

Trec stayed silent through the whole outburst and just listened, even when Dwicky stood up and started to kick his mess around and continued to shout. When everything was finally quiet and Dwicky had stopped speaking, that was when Trec spoke up. "Well, out of everything I expected, this was not one of those things." He stood up from the couch and moved beside the other, trying to read Dwicky's expression as he continued speaking. "This is some really heavy stuff you've gotten yourself into, Dwicky. Can you imagine what would happen to you if you get caught? Were you even thinking?" He shook his head for a moment and looked away. "I'm not trying to judge you or anything, far from it. Hell, I've done some weird things myself. Not like this, but still a little out there. I'm just wondering what made you think getting involved with a fourteen year-old would be a good idea." He looked back at the other. "We were not taught i this /i in college." He couldn't help teasing at least a bit.

Dwicky gave his friend a horribly dirty look but it fell from his face just as quick. He shrugged weakly. "Everything just kept layering. I knew it was a bad idea but I did it anyway. I just wanted to help him get out of the institution." He paused a second and his cheeks heated over. "Yea, that was him, the kid I was with yesterday; Dib." Hot embarrassment colored his skin worse. "All I ever did was make him promises about when he gets out. And now that he's out all I find myself doing is making new promises four years from now when he's eighteen." Dwicky rubbed his brows, but it did little to help. "The boy has real problems, and I seem to be the only one who really cares. His family was more than happy to lock him away for three years in a mental institution and forget about him. You should have seen how far gone he was when I first came there. Now you wouldn't know by looking at him. Now he's just like any other teenager." Dwicky chewed his lip; but there were still the voices and nightmares that plagued Dib, and that the boy would be most likely medicated for the rest of his life. But some things were best left private.

"That was him?" Trec seemed shocked once again and another shaky laugh came from him as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Wow, I thought that kid was like, twelve or something." He dropped his hand and cleared his throat before going on, a serious expression once more on his face. "What a loving family he has." There was obvious sarcasm in the words. "What kind of promises are you making him now? I mean, if everything has been okay for you two then what's the big deal? You seemed happy yesterday and even now, you're talking about how much you love him."

"The medication… and poor nutrition... it all- stunted his growth." Dwicky silently rubbed his goatee. "He's smart. A very intelligent boy, quick learner, and very sweet." Dwicky let out a small forlorn sound. "I know... he's so small and comes across as very childish sometimes, and I feel so guilty for putting him in such a serious relationship at such a young age. But somehow, he handles it. I think it's because he doesn't fully grasp the gravity of the entire situation. But… I guess he's the smarter one. He's not the one breaking down to an old college friend over it." Dwicky tried to chuckle, but it came out more sad than anything. "Hmm. Mm. Four years is a long, long, long _long_ time to wait, Trec. To be constantly hiding, to be worried just who saw what and who they know, to who might walk by. To be worried: 'is this touch just a little too affectionate?', 'Are we touching just a little too much?'." Dwicky went back to pacing. "We've already had too many close ones to be safe. This isn't safe. I can't stop worrying, thinking over every detail." Dwicky stopped and walked back near his friend. "But I can't leave him, Trec. I talked to him yesterday about putting 'us' on hold until he was old enough." He blinked hard, his eyes already aching. "You should have seen him, Trec. He looked like I murdered his entire family and then hit his dog in the getaway car, then put it in reverse and ran it over again." Dwicky let his head thunk on Trec's shoulder, everything about him slumping in defeat.

Trec glanced sideways at Dwicky and smiled sadly. He lifted a hand to rub his friend's back, trying his best to comfort the other as best he could. "Sounds like he's hooked on you just as badly." His hand fell back down and he let out a sigh. "You can't worry all the time though, Dwicky. Of course you're in a very dangerous situation, but if you just continue to worry about this and that, then you won't even be able to enjoy being around him for what time you are until he's actually legal."

Dwicky grunted, shaking his head to rub his eyes on Trec's shirt. "You're a horrible counselor. I want my money back."

Trec had to grin at that. "This coming from the guy that's sleeping with his fourteen year-old client." He shook his head and tsked. "Next to you, I'm now a saint."

"Hey. That's insensitive. As a counselor, you're not suppose to point out things so bluntly." Dwicky stood back from Trec and poked the other in the stomach. "And his name is 'Dib'." He rubbed an eye as he straightened. "…and I don't regret what I did." Dwicky remembered those clinging moments in his bed with Dib so silently abused; _'you don't regret anything do you?'_ "I never did any of this to hurt him, or to sleep with him. I just- he deserves better than what he has in this dead-end town. All the bad stuff that happened to him... even now... it's my fault either way." He scoffed very wryly. "The law will agree with me there."

Trec shook his head at those words. "I doubt the fact he was in an institution is in any way your fault." He raised a brow. "Besides, what do you mean, even now? It sounds to me like he's happy with you and was pretty miserable on his own." He shrugged his shoulders. "What bad stuff could there be other than the obvious. And if that was the case, then you wouldn't be a very free man right now."

Dwicky turned to face Trec, a frown plain on his face. "...He has his enemies." He shut his eyes and rubbed his mouth. Finally he gave a sigh and let his hand fall back down. "I let him down, Trec. I met him at that skool I worked for briefly. He was a raving nut bar, as far as his cabinet-drawer full file at skool said. He reminded me of me at that age, big on the paranormal; just waiting to have his dreams smashed under the boot of reality. I thought I could easily talk some sense into him. I lied about believing in that stuff still, said I'd be his 'partner' in that big fight. But one lie lead to another lie- until I just up and left, leaving him crushed." Dwicky sighed loudly. "I was the foundation of Dib's institutionalization." He knocked on his own head.

"Wow..." Trec gave a low whistle at that bit of information. "How romantic." He crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. "Well, he's obviously forgiven you, and everything you've done for him. I would say counts as making it all up to him. You took care of him and helped him get out of the asylum. That's pretty damn good if I do say so myself." A frown came over his face as he went on. "The worst could have happened, you know. He could have held a grudge with you and just not cared about you at all. But look at the two of you. Not only is he better, but you care so much about him that I think you're going nuts." The serious look on his face turned to a grin.

Dwicky blinked, rubbing one arm as he looked thoughtful. He furrowed and unfurrowed his brow and shook his head. "Understatement there." He turned his attention back on Trec and gave his friend a good hard look "You're rather understanding and accepting of this." Dwicky rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Most people would call me a good many appropriate things, beat me with something hard and blunt, then throw my mangled body to the authorities." Dwicky paused and gave a very weak smile. "...Thanks."

Trec waved a hand. "It's no big deal." He blinked his eyes at those words. "Well, I mean it is, but, it would be pretty shallow of me to throw away a good many years of friendship just because you decided it would be a good idea to love someone you're not supposed to." He shrugged and let his hand drop back down. "Besides, I'd feel lower than dirt breaking you two apart like that. I may hate being in a relationship. It doesn't mean I wish anything ill on anyone that's in one."

Dwicky nodded tiredly. "Thanks... Mmm, I think." He wandered back to the couch and plunked himself down. "I'm so tired. The worry is eating me alive." He rested his head on the arm of the couch and gave a weak grin up at Trec. "But it's worth it, ya'know... just to see him so happy. Smiling. Laughing. To see that he's okay." He let his eyes shut, his voice drifting off as he continued. "It's the best thing in all the worlds."

Trec shook his head as he smiled sadly. "You shouldn't let it all get to you too much. He may start to notice how run down you are and then he'll start to worry over you. Then you'll both just be two piles of worry and that's not really a great thing to be. It'll cause a lot of stress between you two." He walked over to sit on the couch beside Dwicky and kept his eyes on the other. "So, what was wrong with him anyway?"

Dwicky cracked open an eye to glance at Trec with a slight smirk. "As his personal counselor I'm not privy to release such personal information." He closed his eye again and scratched a brow. "...I've already said much too much."

Trec raised a brow. "You're not privy to doing a lot of things, but that didn't stop you." He shrugged and leaned back on the couch, letting his hands rest behind his head. "I don't think telling me what's wrong with the kid's... er... Dib's..." He gave a sheepish smile before going on. "Dib's head is really going to effect much."

Dwicky didn't answer for a long moment. "...He's schizophrenic."

Trec seemed startled for a while before he finally looked away towards the ceiling. "Okay, I wasn't expecting that one, either." He shook his head and couldn't help the small laugh that escaped him. "Wow, man, you sure know how to pick 'em." He looked back at Dwicky. A smirk on his face. "No wonder you're so stressed out. It must have been one bumpy ride just to get him better."

Dwicky barely raised his head to give Trec a rather exhausted look of aggravation that had the words 'obviously' written all over it. Ge shrugged and rested his head back down, closing his eyes again. "...You can't really choose who you love or why. You just do."

"Yeah, yeah." Trec rolled his eyes at those words. "Hopeless romantic and all that. Got it." He kept his attention on Dwicky for a bit longer, thinking over something and finally deciding to voice it. "So, what happens when you can no longer counsel him? I mean, after a while aren't his parents going to get sick of paying you if he's completely better? What then?"

"...I talked his dad into letting me continue counseling now that he's out." Dwicky shook his head. "I'm getting paid to sleep with his underage son." He groaned and rubbed his face, dragging fingers through his hair after. "I know it's just an excuse so I can see him without suspicion but... it's just wrong. I need to stop. But... I can't think of any other way to spend time with him without his dad wondering what someone my age is doing hanging out with someone Dib's age. What's even creepier is my bread and butter comes from his dad. That's my current employment. I dedicate all my time to this boy." Dwicky sighed. "And if I found other work, I'm sure Dib would think I'm cheating on him. Especially if it's at the mental institution." He paused, turning to stare up at the ceiling. "...And it's not like his dad will miss the money." He snorted.

"Woah! Wait a minute." Trec sat up straight and turned around to completely face Dwicky. "You have no other clients except for Dib, who you aren't even really counseling?" He seemed a bit confused for a few seconds before he continued speaking. "What kind of money is this guy making that you're able to just take on one client and live day by day? Geez, if this guy has any other messed in the head kids, tell him to send them my way."

Dwicky almost laughed at that. "She'd mutilate you..." He sighed softly and rubbed his forehead. "Dib is… Professor Membrane's son." he hesitantly answered.

Trec lost count of how long he sat there staring at Dwicky before his eyes widened as he finally stood up and jumped away from the couch. One finger pointed at the other. "Dude! That's like, suicide! You know what that guy could do if he found out?!" He blinked his eyes and let his hand fall down. "Wait, I guess I'm not really helping, am I?" He looked away towards the floor as he mumbled words under his breath. "I didn't even know that guy had kids."

"Dib and Gaz." Dwicky groaned, furrowing his brows as he frowned. "I know, I know. The Professor is God and it's like sleeping with Jesus; can't get much more taboo than that. But Professor Membrane seems to have this 'out of sight, out of mind' attitude. If he doesn't see any problems, there are none. All he wants is a 'sane' son." Dwicky made the quotey fingers to match the word. "And as long as Dib isn't ranting and raving on about things that aren't scientific, he's happy." He scowled. "Frankly I can't stand the man."

"Well, you better get used to the guy if you plan on 'counseling' his son until he's legal." Trec smirked at that, but the humor fell from his face just as quickly as he thought over something. "Besides, what's wrong with the guy? He's the big shot of the city. He's done so many good things for us. What's wrong with him wanting Dib to get better?"

"His idea of 'making Dib get better' is throwing him into the hands of the mental institution and making them deal with him. Not once did that bastard visit Dib in that place. Not once. Not even when he was asked. No. He didn't want to bother with him until he'd gotten his desired result. He was just going to stand back and wait, after all the hard effort, and then take his son back. He's a horrible, neglectful father." Dwicky snorted. "I had to pull some really low blows to get Dib out." He cleared his throat and averted his gaze. "I threatened with social services." He smirked a little. "Oh, he listened to me then." he added quietly.

Trec raised a hand to scratch at the back of his head. "Well, wait a minute. If he's as neglectful as you say he is, then what about the other kid? Gaz, that was her name, right?" He made his way back over to the couch and sat down once more. "What's going on with her? She's not in a mental institution as well, is she?"

"Gaz. She's taking full advantage of her big brother being out of the house. She's a cruel, cruel bitch, with a cruel little girlfriend named Tak; they're like evil clones." Dwicky pinched the bridge of his nose, recalling the past few days. "Gaz would murder with a glare if she could get away with it. Manipulative and abusive; it's quite disturbing considering since she's only thirteen!"

Trec wagged a finger towards Dwicky after the other was finished speaking. "You know, I think I dated a girl like that once." He shuddered at just the thought and dropped his hand back down. "Are you sure it's not his family that drove Dib nuts instead of you? Because a sister like that and such a _loving_ father, well, I wouldn't be very healthy myself."

"I wouldn't doubt it. It was a good many things that attributed to Dib's mental state. And I can tell you 'STRESS' is at the top of the list, in big bold red letters and underlined at least five times." Dwicky pointed at Trec. "That's probably the root of your dislike for dating." He gave a weak smirk but it just as quickly fell away. "Anyway, there's far more people wanting Dib to fail than succeed in his life. I think I'm the only one that wants what's truly best for him."

Trec glared at Dwicky for the remark about his love life, but quickly let it go and shrugged. "Well, it's not like the whole world is against him. I'm sure in time he can easily learn to just get over the whole mess with his family. Of course, something like that is difficult, but you said he was doing much better now, right?"

Dwicky gave a small nod. "Today is his first day of skool. There was a whole lot of trouble before, but it's better now. He was really excited about it today. I guess... we'll just have to live life each day. It'll make time crawl, but, at least we're making the most of it." Dwicky glanced at Trec. "Trec? ...Do you think it would be best if he and I waited? I really don't know what to think anymore. I'm not thinking with the right part of me, I'm too biased and close to the situation to make good judgment anymore."

Trec groaned at the question and flopped back to lay on his side of the couch. "Oh man..." He raised a hand and rubbed down his face, staying silent even after it dropped back down. After a few moments he finally spoke up, having gotten his thoughts in order. "You said you talked to him about it before and he was pretty upset about it. If that's the case then it would probably do more harm than good. I understand you're worried about everyone around you and that makes sense, but can you honestly say that you would be happy being apart from him for four years?" He moved to sit up on his elbows. "Especially now, as hooked as you are. Wouldn't it hurt you too? How long would you seriously last?"

Dwicky propped his head on his arm, closing his eyes a moment. "... I'd hope four years. But who am I kidding, I wouldn't last a week. Dib would last even less. Mmph. Am I in a mess."

Trec shook his head. "Love is love is love. Ups and downs included. Your downs are just a bit more extreme at the moment." He stayed silent for a bit before a grin came to his lips. "Now I understand why we didn't last. I wasn't young enough for you." He couldn't help teasing, trying his best to lift Dwicky's mood as best he could.

But it only had a TV guide flying at his head.

"Not funny, Trec." Dwicky huffed and stuck out his tongue at his friend; a bad immature habit from Dib. "…The reason we didn't work out is because you were neglectful, self absorbed, and frigged. Oh- and a bad kisser. Ha!" Dwicky smirked wryly.

Trec rubbed the side of his abused head. He shot a dirty look at his friend before speaking up. "So, does that mean Dib is the complete opposite of all of that?" He raised a brow. "As well as a good kisser?" He wanted to make Dwicky feel at least a little awkward in return for the bump he knew he would have on his head later.

"Yes. Actually." Dwicky leaned back with a grin, putting his hands behind his head comfortably. "Sad isn't it; to be beaten by a fourteen year-old." He laughed from between teeth.

"Just a little." Trec mumbled the words mostly to himself. He kept silent once more as he thought over a few things. Finally, a small grin came to his lips and he leaned over to nudge Dwicky in the side. "Hey, remember how I told you the others were bugging me about you?" He didn't wait for an answer before going on. "Instead of letting them continue to bug me, how about you come hang out at the mall with us." He moved a hand up to scratch at his head. "Provided, I have to work at the same time, but, that doesn't matter. What matters is, you could bring Dib along with you. It'll give you a chance to try and get over your damn worry and just have a good time with us like you used to. I'm sure the kid wouldn't mind hanging around with us as long as you're there."

The grin left Dwicky's face. "…Wouldn't that weird everyone else out? ...Let alone be awkward on so many levels." He averted his gaze as he thought it over.

Trec waved his hand. "Not at all. Just tell them what you told me at first. That he's your client and you have to have him clinging to you twenty four seven or else he'll have some sort of mental breakdown." He dropped his hand and shrugged. "Not exactly the same words you said to me, but they'll understand either way you put it, I'm sure."

Dwicky rolled his eyes and scoffed. "Yea, sure, that won't make things more awkward." But all the same he sighed, lowering his hands back down to his lap. "Mmm... I dunno..."

"You hate having to worry about everyone around you, then here's your chance to just stop." Trec leaned forward to try his best and look at Dwicky's face. "You two can't keep yourselves locked up in the house all the time just because of your relationship. That's not healthy." He leaned back once more as he went on. "People show their affection with their kids all the time outside. Parents, cousins, grandparents. What's anyone going to think if you're one more person added to the mix?" He grinned. "Just try not to kiss him. People might find that a little strange."

"Half the time they think I'm his dad." Dwicky snerked some. "Such a blow to my ego." He chuckled just a little. "Hmm. But you're right. If we keep the affection plutonic, no one should really question it. At the most people might think he's my little brother or something to that effect. We can still be cautious, but we shouldn't have to hide. We'll go stark raving mad if, okay correction _I'll_ go stark raving mad, if we continue to worry so much. Er- if I continue to worry so much." Dwicky clicked his tongue thoughtfully. "I just hope Dib fits in. Feels comfortable around the others and vice versa, ya'know. I don't know what all of us would do." He smirked. "Aside from side around and reminisce like the old men we are about 'the good old days'."

"Hey now, I don't know about you, but I am not old." Trec narrowed his eyes on Dwicky before he shrugged. "They'll more than likely bug you about where you've been. I have to admit I'm curious myself as to where you went. It had to have been one hell of a trip to be gone for three years."

Dwicky frowned to himself. "...That's what I'm worried about." He shook his head. "I mean; it was nothing big, just seeing the world, loafing, relaxing. Not much."

Trec had picked up on Dwicky's earlier comment and it had him raising a brow. "Bull. If it was nothing big then you wouldn't be worried. Not to mention you would have kept in contact with at least one of us. Maybe even a phone call or something."

"... I didn't think I would be coming back." Dwicky loosely shrugged. "I... didn't really have a way to contact you guys. Heh, the long distance charges for a phone call would have bankrupt you." He chuckled nervously. "Really, Trec, it was just some sight seeing with some friends I met. No big deal, I swear." He waved a hand for his friend to dismiss the questioning about it.

Trec kept his eyes on Dwicky for a bit longer before he gave in with a sigh. "Fine, whatever, man. Just don't expect the others to go so easy on you. You know how pushy they can be at times. They think counselor is a fancy word for 'I'm going to nose in your business and you're going to like it.' even when they aren't working. Annoys the hell out of me."

"Kinam still thinks he's a psychologist, huh? Or was it a therapist?" Dwicky sat more comfortably up on the couch. "Or did he actually go back to college and get those degrees or masters?" He laughed and waved a hand. "I swear, that guy tries to psychoanalyze _everything_. You could say 'I'm hungry' and he thinks that it's caused by a deep seeded problem that started at childhood, a feeling of ineptness due to not hugged enough when you were three at breakfast time and your mother was sleeping with the milk man. Such a funny guy."

Trec groaned and slid down on the couch. "It's not funny when you have to deal with the guy everyday." He glanced sideways at Dwicky. "Be glad you decided to talk to me and not him. He would have you strapped to a chair trying to pick your brain apart in an instant had you blabbed to him." He rolled his eyes and looked away from Dwicky. "Could you only imagine the excuses he would have tried to come up with for you?"

It was Dwicky's turn to groan and he draped himself back over the arm of the couch, rubbing his face and just keeping his hand lent on his forehead. "Let's seee: trying to recapture my fleeting youth and energy through hooking up with a younger significant other. Uhhh, some kind of trauma drawing back from my childhood where I wasn't loved enough and thus in turn I seek out to rectify it in a vicarious action such as inflicting what affections I never got in a twisted form of sexual relations." He paused and laughed. "Uhhh. It hurts my head. Why can't an apple just be an apple with Kinam?"

"Because then he wouldn't be the Kinam that we all know and love." Trec snorted at that and kept his eyes on the ceiling. It was quiet for a while before a curious expression came over his face, but it was soon followed by a grin. "Speaking of certain relations..." He turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "Are you sure all of this lack of energy isn't just because you can't keep up with your fourteen year old?"

Dwicky instantly gave Trec a dirty look. "No." he spoke firmly "I'm sure." He smirked some after.

"Alright, if you say so." Trec turned his eyes back to the ceiling. "At any rate, I'm sure you'll have nothing to worry about. Dib seemed fine yesterday when I was talking to you. Ignoring the fact the kid seemed like he was ready to glare a hole into me, but, other than that, perfectly fine." He looked back at Dwicky. "If you talk to him about everything, then I'm sure he won't mind hanging around you and some friends."

Dwicky gave a small apologetic smile. "Dib doesn't really have many friends, I guess he gets jealous easy. Hmm, it makes him kind of clingy. But he's getting better. Like I said- he's going to skool, he'll have friends of his own soon." He poked at a random newspaper that seemed to be his neighbor with him on the couch. It looked at least a month old. "I suppose I could talk to him about it. I guess he wouldn't mind. I think he'll be more panicked about you knowing our situation than anything really." Dwicky made a dreading sound over that as he picked up the newspaper, leafing through it to snoop at the old articles. "That'll be an experience." He gave Trec a smug sort of look. "I think you'll have to prove your worth to the kiddo."

"Prove my worth? Ha!" Trec shook his head. "I work with kids, Dwicky. They all love me." He looked away, avoiding eye contact with the other for a moment. "Not including the ones that run away screaming from me. Those don't count." He looked back at his friend and held up a finger. "But, the others adore me. I swear it."

Dwicky narrowed his eyes in amusement. "Oh yes, I could see the adoration in Dib's eyes as he glared a hole right through your head and then stuck his tongue out at you when you weren't looking. You totally won him over, charmer." He laughed "Aw, I'm sure you two will get to know each other and, more later than sooner, get along." He teasingly laughed again.

Trec blinked his eyes. "He stuck his tongue out at me?" His eyes narrowed as he looked away towards the wall. "What a brat." He thought over what he just said and quickly looked back at Dwicky. "Er... sorry." Trec cleared his throat as he tried to get comfortable once more on the couch. "So, how are you going to explain to him that you just told your deepest darkest secret to a friend?"

It was an empty paper coffee cup that went flying at Trec's head this time.

"First off I'll tell him there's no problem because you'll be dead and beaten if you keep with the remarks, sly." Dwicky smirked as he narrowed his eyes. "Second of all, well, I'll just tell him the truth. You're a good friend, you wouldn't tell anyone, and that I needed to talk about this to someone before I had myself a nervous breakdown." He shrugged looking to the coffee table and the clutter on it. "Contrary to belief, I'm only human. I can only carry so much on my shoulders alone." Dwicky seemed to solemn up. "... I just hope he understands and doesn't hate me for it."

Trec rubbed his head much the same way he had last time. He glared at Dwicky for a few moments before he shook his head and let his hand fall back down. "I'm sure he will, but it's stupid of you to think you have to carry every single problem alone. Aren't you supposed to share your problems in a relationship?" He raised a brow. "Or am I getting that part wrong also?"

"If everything was as textbook as its read, then we wouldn't be employed." Dwicky smirked. "And isn't a counselor just a lazy man's therapist? Less skooling, less liability and less lawsuits. But, yea, I'm sure he will understand... after the heart attack and aneurysm." He coughed.

"Oh come on, I'm sure it won't be _that_ bad." Trec picked at one of the long threads that were starting to pull away from the worn couch. There was obvious curiosity in his voice as he continued speaking. "So, what made you decide that you actually liked this kid, anyway? I mean, you can't seriously tell me you just came back and bam fell in love with him just like that. That's a little out there." He finally turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "Especially if you only knew him for a day and just completely lied to him the entire time."

Dwicky opened his mouth and then closed it. He looked away, a bit miffed. "Well when you put it that way... I won't."

Trec rolled his eyes and leaned over to poke Dwicky in the arm. "Oh come on. You can't be serious. Spill it. I want to know what was going through your head."

Dwicky swatted at Trec's hand with a whine. "He's… just... he's opened my mind to a lot of things that I thought were long dead, things I had given up hope on." He gave Trec a dry look before he shrugged and flopped back against the couch. "It's a lot of hopelessly romantic stuff that I'm sure you'd want to go without hearing. I'll spare your ears, Mister Forever Single."

Trec ignored Dwicky's last comment and instead tsked as he sat back. "If that was the case then you wouldn't be here. You'd be at home, keeping it bottled up and overdosing on coffee." He couldn't help grinning. "Besides, you didn't seem to mind spilling the most extreme thing to me. So go ahead, it's not like I have much else to do today."

"It's not the 'why' I love him that's the problem... it's the 'when'." Dwicky sighed and clicked his tongue as he looked up at the off white ceiling. "Can I have a non-caffeinated drink? I need something in my system to off set the coffee." He smirked. "Hum..." He ruffled his own hair. "I said I'd pick him up today after skool. His dad is off playing Mister Scientist again of course, even though he signed an agreement on Dib's release." Dwicky scowled. "I don't care what that guy has done for the world, he's a disgusting father."

Trec whistled at those words. "Wow, you sure do hate the guy." He stood up to make his way into the kitchen. There was a few loud noises as he tried to find a cup, but his voice was still heard above it all. "It would be amusing to see the guy's reaction when all is said and done and you two don't have to hide it anymore." He couldn't help laughing at just the thought. "I'd pay to see that." After a few moments he finally made his way back into the living room and handed Dwicky a plastic cup filled with orange juice. "It's all I have and the water still tastes just as bad around here."

"Thanks." Dwicky took the cup and took a sip. "You'd pay to see it? I'd pay to rub it in that guy's face. Snub him good." He bit his thumbnail and flicked his thumb forward. "It would show him a thing or two about paying attention. He may be a genius but when it comes down to it- he's really, really stupid." He scoffed and took another sip of his juice.

Trec raised a brow and studied his friend for a moment. "Hey, Dwicky, what does Dib think about you pretty much despising his dad?" He walked back to the couch and sat down. "His family relationship might not be that great, but doesn't it bother him a little?"

"I don't think he cares. All he ever wanted was some affection from his old man, some goddamn recognition, a pat on the back! I don't think Dib could blame me for feeling bitter about the guy." Dwicky stared sourly into his juice. "I don't think Dib has a very high opinion of him either."

"Wow..." Trec rested back on the couch and stared up once more as he thought over what was said. "Makes you wonder why the guy has kids at all." He couldn't help the smirk that came to his face as he looked back at Dwicky. "Looks like you're pretty much the only one he has."

Dwicky frowned considerably more.

Dwicky's expression caused Trec to frown as well and he stayed silent for a bit until finally he moved a hand out to shove at the side of the other's head. "Don't worry about it, though. He's bound to make at least a few friends at Skool. Just like you said."

Dwicky's head stayed tilted and soon he fell over on the couch, cup resting on his lap. "Mmm... I hope so. I won't know till I pick him up. It's fifty-fifty whether he'll have a good day or not." That caused him to frown even more, now that he had new worries. Everyday since Dib had started skool it only got worse and worse.

Trec sighed and shook his head. "Listen, why don't you crash here until you have to pick him up?" He stood from the couch and walked over, leaning to pick the drink up from Dwicky's lap. "You're down right drained. I'm sure you could use the rest." He set the cup on the table before going on. "I can always wake you up before you have to get ready to leave."

"Sleep?" Dwicky laughed sadly. "…Foreign word to mine ears. What is this funny thing you speak of? Is it edible? Lubricated? Can I wear it on my head to parties?"" He rested his head on the couch's arm heavily, letting his eye sift half closed. "...I'd almost want to take a sedative if I didn't have to drive today." He shut his eyes. "But it could be worse. It could be a couple of days ago." his voice petered off.

Trec narrowed his eyes. "A couple of days ago?" He leaned forward once more to better hear the other while he continued on with his questioning. "Why? What happened a couple of days ago?"

Dwicky cracked an eye open and pushed Trec's face away with a disgruntled whine. "...You ask too many questions."

Trec let out an annoyed noise before he snorted. "Well of course I do. I'm a counselor." He turned around and started to walk away from the couch once more. "Get some sleep. I'll bug you when you have to go get your boyfriend, don't worry." Once he was done speaking, Trec made his way into his own room down the small hall and shut the door behind him.


	37. Sessions 37

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta **Heartless7

Chapter 37

An extra four or so hours and a caffeine high that had long worn off, Dwicky couldn't have been more alert at the wheel had he drank fifteen more cups of coffee. It was that excessive worry that Trec warned him he'd get an ulcer over that ran his adrenaline. His eyes darted left and right at every teenager that poured through the door, noting that each one was indeed not Dib.

He leaned back in the seat and much to his surprise gave a loud, definite yawn. He chastised himself over it, rubbing an eye then a brow, then a temple to keep himself alert, focused. There was going to be either one of two Dibs that would get into his car, and he had to be in the perking mind set to switch to either 'Happy Excited Dwicky' or 'Understanding Compassionate Dwicky'; he was hoping more the first than the second.

Dwicky huffed as he wished Trec had let him go with a cup of coffee instead of refusing him his caffeine refill and gave him a juice box instead; what a grown man of Trec's age was doing with juice boxes was beyond him. But all the same he picked it up and took a sip, looking out the window again for the small, pointy-haired kid.

A few more big groups of students made their way down the stairs, talking and laughing to each other before they waved off and went their separate ways. It was when they parted that Dib could be seen on the stairs, making his way down them one at a time. His expression was hard to tell since at the moment he had his head down at he walked. Once he was on the bottom step he finally looked up and his attention moved around. As soon as he spotted the familiar car a wide smile came to his face and he quickly hurried over to it, having to make a quick stop or else he would have run into it. He opened the passenger door, opening it as wide as he could to poke his head in. "Hey!"

Dwicky grinned and reached over to ruffle the hair of the head that poked in the car. "Hey there, baby. You're in good spirits." That had him grinning more, though he couldn't help the biting anticipation to know just how it went. "How did skool go? Tell me everything." He patted the passenger seat enthusiastically for the boy to get in.

Dib wasted no time in getting inside the car. He threw his bag in the back, glad to have the heavy weight off of his shoulders. Once he was settled, he reached out to close the door as well as buckle his seatbelt while he started speaking. "It was much more enjoyable today. It was nice to get back in there and start learning most of the stuff I forgot." He finally turned his eyes on Dwicky. One of his hands moved out to grab the juice from the man as he continued. "I saw Zim a few times, but surprisingly, he didn't bug me. We just went our separate ways most of the day." He took a sip from the box.

Dwicky let out a relieved sigh that he felt he'd been holding a while, though when he realized he'd done it, he quickly covered it up by talking. "Good. Good. That's excellent to hear." He started up the car and backed out onto the road. "Well go on, I want to hear all about it. Spare no juicy detail." He glanced at Dib to give him a grin.

Dib gave a smile in return as he pulled the straw away from his mouth so he could speak. "Well, I'm actually getting along with people. I didn't feel so much like an outcast in any of my classes." He shrugged a bit as he looked towards the front window. "There were a few times it was awkward, but it wasn't upsetting or anything. I was just trying to ease into it all, ya know?" He looked back at Dwicky and smiled once more. "I even sat with a few people at lunch. I mean, people besides my sister." He blinked his eyes as a bit of confusion came over his features. "I actually didn't see her all day except for when I got there." He looked ahead once more. "Oh well, I'm just happy she didn't bother me." He lifted the juice to drink once more.

"Ohh, so you're making friends? That's great. What did you guys talk about? What did you do in your classes?" Dwicky continued to smile. "It's great to hear your 'first day' turned out so well." He chuckled a little. "I have to admit I was a little worried. But I'm glad it was for nothing."

"A few of them were curious as to why I was starting classes in the middle of the skool year." Dib turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "I just sort of told them I had been going through some personal stuff. I'd rather not have everyone know I had been gone because I was in an asylum for three years if most of them don't already." He set the juice box down in the center, no longer all that thirsty. "As for my classes, well, the teachers were surprised at how much I still knew. Even I was surprised. They still piled the homework onto me, though, just to make sure. It's why my bag is so heavy." He pointed to the back seat.

"Like riding a bike, right?" Dwicky nodded. He let a hand free from the steering wheel to take up one of Dib's, holding and brushing a thumb affectionately along its side as if it was all the most natural of things. "But you're a bright boy, I'm sure you'll catch up quite quickly. Though you'll have to finish your homework before you do anything fun." He gave Dib a soft look of authority. "Sorry, but better to get it out of the way and then have the rest of your day. But-" he tilted his head one way drawing out the word as he mocked thoughtfulness "no need to go home and do that just yet. Maybe stop somewhere and buy something unhealthy to eat; ice cream maybe?" He glanced at Dib from the corner of his eye with a grin.

The suggestion as well as the touch actually startled Dib and caused him to become quiet for a bit, considering the incident that happened the day before he hadn't been expecting any of it. He couldn't help the wide smile that was once again on his face after he finally got over his surprise and immediately nodded his head. "Sure, I'd like that." He couldn't help squeezing Dwicky's hand a bit in return. "You know, you're gonna end up spoiling me."

"Maybe." Dwicky shrugged. "But when was the last time you were spoiled?" He glanced at Dib and smiled softly. "Besides," he lifted Dib's hand to press a lingering kiss on his knuckles "I'd say you deserve it." He let their hands rest back down. "So tell me more about your day. What's your teacher like? I hope you aren't seeing any other counselors." he couldn't help but lightly joke about that.

Dib laughed a bit before he shook his head. "No, don't worry. My messed up mind is still all yours." A small grin came to his face before he turned his attention away once more to think over what he was asked. "The teachers are really nice. They actually seem like they want to be there. Which is a surprising difference from three years ago and being in Miss Bitters class." He moved his free hand around to play with the straw on the box as he kept speaking. "Not a bad difference at all. I'll welcome any other teacher over her any day."

Dwicky shuddered. "She was spooky. I talked to her a few times in the teacher's lounge. I think she ate part of my soul just by looking at me." His smile went a little serious as he continued to drive. "...I've been thinking about going into another job, actually. I don't know about being a skool counselor again, but, ya'know, something that doesn't have me mooching off your dad. It isn't right; to be with you, and be paid under the premise of paid counseling sessions. I don't want that. I want us to have a happy normal relationship."

Dib smiled a bit at that last part and he couldn't help nodding his head in a small bit of agreement. Although, it didn't stop his curiosity and it caused the questions to come from him just as quickly. "But, what else would you do? Would you still help other people instead?" His eyes narrowed a bit as he thought more about it. "And, if my dad doesn't pay you, then doesn't that mean you can't see me anymore?"

"I'm hoping the idea of seeing your counselor without a fee will persuade him to let you visit me." Dwicky loosely shrugged. "Just because I'm your counselor doesn't mean we aren't friends. We've been through a lot; from inside the institution and out. I'm sure he'll see it that way. I don't think it would be too suspicious." Dwicky made a small thoughtful noise, though he was hesitant to speak again. "Maybe an elementary skool counselor again, or maybe I'll counsel at the mental hospital. With how well I helped you, I'm sure they'll hire me part time."

Dib blinked his eyes before he nodded once more. The smile returned to his face and he looked ahead at the rest of the cars on the road. "It makes sense. Hopefully Dad will go for it. He doesn't really seem to mind how much I hang around you so far, maybe it really won't be that big of a deal." He raised a brow. "Are you sure you would want to go back to the asylum, though? I mean, you didn't really seem to like working there so much." He couldn't help smirking as he glanced back at Dwicky. "You're a wuss."

Dwicky opened his mouth and then quickly closed it. "N-no! I am- I'm not! Besides, if it wasn't for that moment I was startled, we would have had no break through. And then I wouldn't be able to do this." He lifted Dib's hand over to place a few kisses on the underside of the boy's wrist. "I may not be the bravest man, but I'd go up against anything for you." He kissed the boy's fingers. "Including your sister and her clone. So, I'd say I'm pretty accomplished. But I was thinking of the more saner, well behaved boys, rather than down in that lower level. Better money in that than at any skool. I guess it's the amount of risk."

Dib had blushed at Dwicky's words as well as his actions. He couldn't help keeping his eyes on their hands, even after Dwicky finished speaking. "I guess so." The words were automatic. Finally, Dib shook his head and looked up at Dwicky, hoping he still didn't seem too flushed. "Well, I guess I should be glad you don't want to take too much of a risk this time around. It'll stop you from becoming startled again and having another break through with some other insane boy." He couldn't help teasing.

Dwicky couldn't help the small laugh at Dib's words and he pulled over to the side of the road, stopping the car. "No." he turned to Dib, finally now able to give him his full attention. He leaned forward, taking his hand from the wheel to Dib's jaw to coax him nearer as well. "You're all the 'insane boy' I need." He then placed an endearing kiss on Dib's lips.

Dib easily gave into the kiss and let his eyes slip shut. His free hand moved up to cling to Dwicky's shirt, refusing to let go the entire time through the kiss. After a bit he pulled back, giving a quick lick to Dwicky's lips and just barely pulling away so he could speak. "Does this mean you're not upset anymore?" He realized he wasn't being very specific and quickly tried to correct himself as he glanced away. "I mean, yesterday you seemed upset. After what you asked, you just seemed really out of it." He looked back to Dwicky. "Are you feeling better now?" He couldn't help fidgeting with Dwicky's shirt, afraid some more 'what ifs' would suddenly be asked of him again.

Dwicky gave a small shake of his head. "No, I'm not upset anymore." He softly stroked Dib's cheek, giving it a quick affectionate kiss. "I actually do feel a lot better. I had some good counseling, actually, of my own. Heh." His expression went to something gentler. "I had a long, long talk with that close friend of mine... from yesterday; Trec. I needed to get a lot off my chest; worry, stress, aggravation and frustration with myself, the situation." He placed another kiss on Dib's lips, a more intimate affection just to sooth any worry. "I told him about us... some about you… but no deep specifics, nothing about what happened with your sister. He was shocked at first, but he listened, and he was very understanding. He won't say anything to anyone else, so don't worry. But Trec made me realize that we shouldn't 'sweat the small stuff'; just make the most of what time we can together, and be happy about it." Dwicky smiled a little, letting his hand rest on Dib's shoulder. "Plutonic affections in public and-" he raised his hand again to caress the boy's cheek with his fingers "more intimate affections in privacy. There's no point in being miserable when we don't have to. Sure, we still have to be careful and cautious but... I want to be with you, all the time. It doesn't matter how." Dwicky lowered his gaze and he smiled weakly, his hand stilled cupping Dib's cheek. "You had the right idea all along."

Dib almost forgot how to breathe before he finally spoke up, having to actually take air into his lungs. "Okay, um, I'm happy that you're happy and that everything is great. But, are you nuts?!" His eyes widened as he nearly shouted. "What if nothing turned out okay and he wasn't so understanding at all of what you told him? Remember what happened with my sister?" He moved his hand up to poke a finger at Dwicky's forehead. "What were you thinking?" His expression turned to worry, despite being told everything was okay.

Dwicky blinked a good few times before he rubbed his forehead. He placed either hand on Dib's cheeks. "Dib, relax. Please. Breathe. Take a deep breath, and calm down." He unfurrowed his brows and quieted his voice in a soothing manner. "I've known Trec for years. Since college and long after when we all moved on to our separate jobs. During that time we've confided in each other about numerous things, about family, relationships, money and stupid things we weren't so proud of. He may seem lazy and self-centered but he's a good person where it counts and very trust worthy. Him and I have helped each other a lot in desperate times." Dwicky shook his head. "He's as far from your sister as he can get." He smiled weakly. "You can even talk to him yourself if you want. Get to know him. He really is a good guy, and he really did help me."

Dib continued to stay skeptical for a bit longer before he finally caved with a sigh. "I still can't believe you did that." He frowned, but still leaned forward to place a kiss on Dwicky's lips. "But I guess if you needed someone to talk to, I can't really blame you." He looked down between them at their hands and began to toy with Dwicky's ring as he kept speaking. "I guess the past few days have been a little stressful. Well, more than a little." He looked back up and smiled. "But I'm glad he was able to help you get your thoughts in order." His head tilted a bit as he thought over something. "How would you expect me to talk to him?"

"Well that offer to hang out with my old friends still stands, according to Trec." Dwicky managed to perk with optimism now that Dib was at ease again. "You're more than welcome to come. Though I don't know how fun a bunch of old guys standing around in a mall can be." He grinned, enjoying stealing another kiss from Dib. "They'll probably bombard me with stupid questions of where I've been, what I'm doing, why I didn't call." He slipped an arm around Dib's middle, tugging the boy nearer by the small of his back so he could dip his head to place a few playful kisses along the side of Dib's neck. "Why I have such a cute little boy clinging to me." He playfully nibbled just below jaw and ear.

Dib let out a small noise at the attention as he leaned towards Dwicky's mouth. He was easily distracted for a few moments and couldn't help the quiet laugh that escaped him as one small bite became ticklish. His hand moved up to run along the rim of Dwicky's ear and he moved a finger down until he found the man's piercing, twisting it as he finally found his voice. "Sounds interesting. I guess I wouldn't really mind it all that much. It's just another chance to go out and spend another day with you. Including a few extra people, but just the same." He turned his head to have a better look at the other. "You'd really be okay with me going with you?"

"I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't." Dwicky petered a few more kisses along the side of Dib's neck, finding his ear to give it a grinning bite. "Gives me a chance to show you off." He chuckled low in his throat before he continued on. "In a plutonic sense, of course." He took the rim of Dib's ear in his mouth and playfully sucked on it.

"Of course." Another moan left Dib after he spoke and he couldn't help squirming in his seat. He freed their hands to move his own under Dwicky's shirt and trail fingers along the man's side. At the same time he leaned forward, trying not to disturb the other as he gave a quick lick to Dwicky's other ear before speaking near it. "Is our trip out for ice cream going to turn out like the cake?" He grinned.

Dwicky chuckled lazily as he let go of Dib's ear. He blew cool air on damp skin and placed a few more kisses near the boy's cheek. "Cake and ice cream go well together, though." He leaned back, amusement plainly on his face. "But you're right, we should get going." He raised his brows and grinned. "You're too classy to be had in a car, anyway."

"Then my class just ruined my fun." Dib sat back in his seat while he grabbed hold of Dwicky's hand once more and allowed them to fall to the center of their seats. The smile that was on his face slowly fell as he began to think over what was discussed earlier. "Do you think your friends will like me?" He slouched down a bit in his seat as he asked the next question. "Besides Trec, are they nice?"

Dwicky glanced to the road, watching a few cars drive by, he glanced back and pulled the car back onto the road. "Trec is the most outgoing out of all of us. Aside from Macks, who ended up dropping out of our class. He found dental hygiene to be more of his passion than counseling people with their problems. The worst he can do is recommend braces and suggest you brush your teeth more. But other than that, he's as friendly as Trec. Those two were big trouble makers back in the day" Dwicky shrugged with a laugh. "The only one you should probably keep your eye on is Kinam. He'll analyze you into the ground. He takes his job _far_ too seriously. He thinks that every spoken word has some deeper meaning. Oh, and lastly there's Fwenn. She was more big on the 'ink blot' side of the psyche. Ya'know, look at blotches and tell what you see. She believed you could unravel the mind just from one answer. She was really good at it too; kinda spooky. She'd ask you to draw whatever you want, totally have at, and from that she'd pluck your mood, what's on your mind, things that you didn't think could be perceived from just one drawing. Kinam was always kind of jealous of her knack with it."

"I had to do that before while I was at the asylum. The whole ink blot thing. I hated it because no matter what, it all looked like blotches." Dib made a face at such memories before he turned his eyes back on Dwicky. "They sound really nice." He looked down as a sudden moment of worry came over him. "Do you really think your one friend will ask me a bunch of questions and bother me about what's wrong?" He glanced up, but a small frown was still on his face. "I'd rather just try and feel as normal as possible while I'm with all of you. I don't know if I would feel comfortable with someone besides you asking me all of that stuff."

"Don't worry, I'll protect you from the scary counselors and the lone dentist." Dwicky squeezed the boy's hand with a grin and raised it up to place a few affectionate kisses on the back of Dib's hand. "No boyfriend of mine will be psychoanalyzed or have a dental review without an appointment while I'm still around" He placed one last kiss on Dib's hand before he rested their hands back down. "I'll tell them to back off, they'll listen. And if Kinam persists, I'll just beat him over the head with a blunt object. It works for Fwenn most of the time."

Dib couldn't help but laugh at that and it caused his nerves to calm. "Maybe it won't be so bad. Besides, going to the mall will help me get used to even more people." His excitement came back as he smiled at Dwicky. "I don't really mind much at all now, but there are still a few times when I get nervous. So, maybe it will help me calm down." He suddenly seemed to realize something and looked a little nervous for a moment before he spoke. "I guess it was a little mean of me to stick my tongue out at your friend yesterday, wasn't it?"

Dwicky laughed. "Yes, yes it was. But don't worry about it. You two will get along fine, I'm sure. You'll get along with everyone. Like I said, they're good people, very friendly. They have to be, they're jobs require them to be people… people." He snickered, knowing Trec. "Just don't make a habit of sticking your tongue out to all my friends. But I'm sure you'll make a good impression." He smiled at Dib.

"I'll try to." Dib returned the smile before a curious expression came over his face. "What did you and your friends used to do while you were in college?" He couldn't help asking. Finally being able to learn much more about Dwicky's life was something he had hoped to be able to do for a while. "Besides learning how to get inside people's heads, I mean." He smiled a little.

Dwicky drove into the ice cream parlor's lot, parking while he gave Dib's question some thought. He whistled. "That was a while back. Aside from late nights of caffeinated nicotine trying to pull all nighters? Trec and Macks usually tried to pry me loose from my desk to actually have some fun. Parties, I guess, held in the dorms. Hanging out in Fwenn's room, much to the chagrin of her prissy roommate." Dwicky undid his seatbelt and stepped out of the car. "Sometimes we hung out at the art area of the college. Well, when I say 'hung out' I mean Fwenn dragged one of us down there. She liked to get in the heads of the art students there. She ended up dating someone there for a year I think." He rubbed the back of his head thoughtfully. "I can't really remember."

Dib walked around the car to stand beside Dwicky and kept his eyes on the man until he was finished speaking. It was easy to tell he had been completely interested through the whole conversation, because once it was over he seemed a little upset. It didn't stop him from perking back up and asking new questions instead. "So, what did you do at the parties you went to?" He reached his hand out to take Dwicky's back while pulling him towards the parlor.

"Uh... well," Dwicky cleared his throat, his cheeks warming a little, "ya'know, talking, hanging out, drinking, dancing. All the normal party like activities. Usually Fwenn tried to pick up a cute guy or girl. Trec and Macks always 'mysteriously' disappeared together and Kinam safe guarded the liquor by hiding it in his stomach." He pulled the door open and let Dib in first, following after him.

Dib gave a small smile. "Well, I've never been to a party, so I wouldn't really know." He turned around to walk backwards as he continued talking. "Sounds like it was fun, though. Hopefully I'll be able to hang around friends and do those kinds of things too. Minus the drinking and horrible hangover afterwards." He laughed at that, but quickly stopped when he bumped into someone. The contact caused him to turn around quickly with wide eyes and mumble an apology, despite the dirty look he was being given. Once the person turned away Dib stayed where he was, but couldn't help fidgeting with the front of his shirt as his eyes darted around.

Dwicky quickly took Dib's arm to tug him over to the array of ice cream buckets behind the window, as many different and disturbing flavors that man could think of. "So, what will you be having? Mmm, grass-flavored ice cream." He laughed. "Creepy."

Dib had almost lost his balance at the sudden tug, but was able to catch his footing before he fell over. Dwicky's words caused him to let out a small laugh as he looked over each flavor. He passed over each of the more disturbing ones and made a face. "I didn't know it was possible to mix popcorn with ice cream. That doesn't sound very pleasing." He pointed a finger to one of the buckets. "I'll just have cherry."

"One cherry and one chocolate please. Two scoops for both." Dwicky held up two fingers in gesture. He took the ice creams when they were handed to him and gave one to Dib. "I'm more for the old fashion flavors: vanilla, chocolate and strawberry. Anything wilder would overload my poor tongue." He laughed. "Should we sit inside? Outside? Wander? It's up to you, kiddo." He made a wide grand gesture to all.

Dib looked around once he was asked the question and once he spotted the person he bumped into, he immediately made up his mind. "Let's go outside. I feel like that one person is burning a hole through me with their eyes." He took a small lick from his cone before he pointed out the door. "Besides, there's small benches outside we can sit at and I have no problem with it."

"The people in this town get grumpier every year." Dwicky walked to the door and held it again for Dib, stepping out after him. He licked his ice cream, making a small happy sound as he licked his lips. "So what do you have for homework?"

Dib tried to remember each piece of homework he had been given as he walked out the door and continued to lick at his ice cream. "Well, I know I have each subject. They tried to see how well I did before assigning me anything heavy." He chewed at a side of the cone before going on. "Based on that, I was given a few pages of History, some sheets for Writing to look over. Math wasn't too big of a problem, but they still gave me a difficult page to do." He shrugged and licked once more at his ice cream. "For Science they just want me to do a few problems and that's it." They reached the benches and Dib wasted no time in sitting down, looking up at Dwicky once he was seated. "It's the books in my bag that are the heaviest, but I have my notebooks too."

Dwicky whistled. "Wow. Heh, I'm glad I'm not a teenager anymore. I would completely fail everything. College was bad enough, but in hi-skool everyone is judging you as well. Hormones are raging." He snickered as he sat down beside Dib. "But I'm glad to hear you're doing good in it." He grinned and nudged Dib with his elbow, teasing. "Maybe with luck you'll get on the football team." He tried to keep from laughing. "Or the cheerleading squad." He licked his ice cream but still laughed a little.

Dib narrowed his eyes on Dwicky, but it wasn't out of anger. "Very funny." He gave a quick lick to his ice cream before he continued speaking. "I'm just fine doing no strenuous activities at all." He blinked his eyes as he thought over those words. His attention turned back to Dwicky and he grinned. "Well, aside from some things."

Dwicky stopped sucking the tip of his ice cream, pulling it away from his mouth. He quickly cleared his throat, glancing away as he licked his lips. His gaze shifted back to Dib and he smirked some. "Dutifully noted."

Dib's grin grew a bit as he turned his attention back to his ice cream. His eyes wandered around the outside of the parlor at the few people that were around as he continued to lick at the cone. After a few moments he seemed to come to a decision and finally scooted over only to lean against Dwicky's side, letting his head rest on the man's arm. Not once did he stop licking at his ice cream the entire time.

Dwicky didn't seem to mind, continuing to lick his own cone. He looked up at the sky, glancing at the white puffs that had almost successfully taken over the late afternoon sky. He opened his mouth and it seemed as if he'd make a comment about the weather but instead he said "Sooo, the swim team then?" He grinned wide and suggestively at his crack.

Dib nudged an elbow into Dwicky's side before he glanced up at the man. "You're hilarious." Despite the sarcasm, he still gave a small smirk. Just as quickly he turned his attention back in front of him to watch the other people around them with little interest. Since Dwicky had teased him, Dib figured it was his turn to do some of his own. "You know, soon enough, with the way things are going, I might end up meeting your parents at some point." He couldn't help laughing.

Dwicky blinked several times at that. "My parents? Wow. Heh, wouldn't that be something." He made a small 'heh'. "They're getting on in the years. They're a little more giving and understanding than your dad. But I guess it depends on how old or who I introduce you as. Even four years in the future, telling them I have an eighteen year old boyfriend, might break their poor old minds." He laughed. "Aww. But I guess they've seen me go out with worse. But this time, it's the _real_ thing." Dwicky grinned and nudged Dib's side with his own.

Those words caused Dib to blink and turn his attention completely away from his ice cream. "Worse?" He stayed quiet for a few moments as he looked at Dwicky before a slow grin spread on his face. He couldn't help prying a little bit. "What qualifies as worse?"

Dwicky pursed his lips and smirked back. "Anyone else whose not you."

Dib smiled at those words, but shook his head at the same time. "You're such a sweet talker." He turned around on the bench to spread his legs out, letting his back rest against Dwicky's side. "I don't mind it, though." He frowned a little as soon as he noticed his ice cream was melting, and licked the bit that had escaped onto his fingers before he spoke up again. "Well, I don't mind just going along with meeting your friends for now. It works perfectly fine for me."

Dwicky lifted a hand to rest atop Dib's head. "One step at a time." He ruffled the boy's hair a bit before he continued to eat his ice cream. "And I've already met your dad. Such a nice, pleasant man he is."

"You don't really mean that." Dib grinned after he spoke. "You never seem very thrilled when I talk about him or when he comes up at all." He turned his head upside down so he could actually look at Dwicky. "I was afraid you two were going to start fighting when he visited that one time."

Dwicky looked down at Dib. "We don't see eye to eye." He narrowed his eyes at a random object in front of himself. "…and he took apart my remote." He gave a loose shrug. "He's neglectful, distant, expectant, and – well, I try to be polite… and tolerant." He cleared his throat. "As long as he plays the role of a proper father figure, I have no qualms with him."

"Well, you're trying, but I don't know." Dib looked back down and finished off his ice cream before he finished speaking. "He's just really hard to get through to. I shouldn't expect him to just up and suddenly change just because I'm better. It's never been that easy." He shrugged a shoulder as he slid down a bit, letting his head fall back even more against Dwicky. "I'll just have to hope for the best."

"It's been good so far. Really good. I won't complain. It isn't your father I want happy anyway." Dwicky bit into his cone, biting into it until he could shove the entire thing in. "Mmph. Ah. Tasty" He licked his lips. "He'll just wake up one day and realized he missed out on something really great. And then I'll turn and laugh- because I had it all to myself." He grinned and slipped his arm around Dib's middle and gave him a playful hugging squeeze..

Dib let out a laugh as he easily cuddled back against Dwicky. "I'm not complaining either. Not at all." He turned his head a bit to be able to glance at Dwicky. "The whole situation doesn't really bother me as much anymore. I have someone that cares about me now. Before it was completely different, and harder for me to handle." He looked away once more while staying close to Dwicky. "If he wants to continue to act like he did three years ago, then let him."

Dwicky grinned and ruffled Dib's hair with his free hand. "There you go. You have so much to look forward to. You won't have time to worry about your dad. Just worry about how well you're doing. So! That said. Made friends? You said you sat with some kids. My offer for that party still stands." He then hugged the boy with both arms then, grinning much more slyly. "With cake."

Dib let his hands fall to rest on Dwicky's arms. "I still want to do it. Especially if you're promising cake." He let a smile slip before he continued. "As for the people I met, I wouldn't exactly call them friends just yet. They were just people who treated me fairly as apposed to calling me crazy right off the bat." He let his eyes slip closed as he became a bit more comfortable in Dwicky's arms. "I hope I can call them friends soon, though."

"I'm sure you will." Dwicky tucked Dib's head under his own, resting his own on top. "None can resist your charms. At least I can't." Dib could feel the man chuckle.

"I know _you_ can't." Dib teased back before he began speaking once more. "I'm surprised that anyone took even the slightest liking to me at all, though. I expected to be by myself the whole day. I'm happy, but still a little confused by it. Probably because I'm just not used to it." He opened his eyes back up to stare ahead. "I just hope it stays this way and Zim and I can keep ignoring each other."

"Just keep telling yourself you deserve it and it will, and it will. Simple as that. You're an enjoyable person to be around, Dib. There's no reason why people wouldn't like you. You're very intelligent, witty, kind, giving, empathetic and incredibly lickable. Of course the last attribute is only mine to enjoy." Dwicky held Dib just that much more possessively. "Recognize your good qualities, Dib. Be proud to be you."

Dib smiled a bit at each thing Dwicky said. The last one had him laughing a little as he moved his head back to nuzzle it against Dwicky's neck. "Thanks. It all means a lot." He moved back once more, letting his head rest where it had been. "I used to be proud of who I was despite what other people said about me. I guess actually being locked away for so long has kind of clouded my mind and made me think I really shouldn't be." He shook his head. "There's no reason for me to think that anymore."

Dwicky nodded, resting his head back atop Dib's head again. "Pride and ego aren't bad to have. They drive us to better ourselves, our lives, our careers. Of course some people take to an extreme, but you know that's not what I mean." He cuddled Dib's back to his chest and made a pleased noise. "...I don't know what it is, but I like touching you in public. It's nice." He laughed a little.

Dib moved his hands to grab onto both of Dwicky's own, but without disturbing the hold the other had on him. The words had caused Dib to give a content sigh, happy to stay just as they were for as long as they could. "It's nice not having to hide anything. Or, at least not hide what we don't have to." He let his eyes slip closed once again as he kept speaking. "I'm glad you feel better about it."

"Me too." Dwicky nodded. It was a really good day. Things finally, for once in all their times together, felt _normal_.


	38. Sessions 38

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

By Kitteh and Neofox

**Rating** R

**Warnings** Violence and intense smooching

**Disclaimer** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!

**Summary** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta Heartless7**

Chapter 38

City Center Mall was just as it's name explained and a place that was most crowded later in the day when people finally had time to shop. Electronics, clothing, shoes, sporting goods. The place had it all and then some. The food court wasn't all that bad either.

It was through the glass doors of the entrance that Dib walked through, eyes immediately taking in everything around. A bag rested on his shoulders, partly unzipped to let a plush head poke through with small antenna on top. As Dib looked around the amount of people seemed to overwhelm him. When he caught sight of a large group ahead, pushing and shoving at each other it caused his eye to twitch a bit and he turned attention back on the doors, hoping for an escape. "You know, we can always do this again some time."

"No, no." Dwicky gently denied, placing a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Today. It's just like the department store before. Except this is more of a-- warehouse of several hundred department stores." He urged Dib to keep on walking. "Those are just some teenagers having some fun. They won't bother you. So don't worry. The place where Trec works isn't far, it's near the entrance, if I remember correctly. It's a place for parents to drop off their kids to get some peace while they shop." Dwicky rested his arm over Dib's shoulders lightly, keeping the boy at his side and at the same time trying to sooth the boy's nervousness. "I don't know how he can take care of a bunch of screaming kids and hang out at the same time."

Dib still seemed reluctant to move on, but the arm around his shoulders helped him a bit. He kept his eyes on the teenagers until they finally passed them. Being clear of such a big group, Dib finally eased up more and looked up at Dwicky. "Well, maybe he's just good at his job or maybe the kids don't really need all that much care from him." He shrugged.

"Or he's just lazy and locks them up until his shifts over. Or dumps them on a co-worker." Dwicky shook his head and rolled his eyes. "He's going to get fired... again. The guy couldn't keep a steady job to save his life." But before Dwicky said anything more he spotted four familiar bodies not too far away from them, hanging in front of the 'Kid Pen' day care center. A new wide grin spread across Dwicky's. He raised a hand and waved. "Hey! No loitering!"

The words had Dib turning his eyes to where Dwicky's attention was focused. Seeing the sudden group of people had his nerves on edge again and he couldn't help moving closer to Dwicky's side.

One head rose in the group and it belonged to the same familiar face from the past couple of days. "Well, look who actually showed up." Trec nudged the body next to him in the side a bit harder than necessary. "I told you I wasn't lying this time. You guys never believe me." He stopped short and dropped his arm back down when he caught sight of Dib, his attention moving back to Dwicky right after.

A voice came from the end of the line up as one other spoke up. "Well, you are rather insincere." The man leaned over to get a better look at Trec with narrowed eyes before his attention moved to Dwicky. "Hey."

The fellow who Trec had nudged rubbed his side. "Not to mention liar." He nudged Trec right and waved to Dwicky. "Hi!"

"Weell, look who didn't fall off the face of the planet never to be seen again." The only female of the group pushed the boys aside so she could come and get a good look at Dwicky. She adjusted her glasses as she caught sight of Dib. "Hmm? And what decided to follow you home here?" She gave a happy squeak and grabbed the arm of the stoic looking man beside her, giving him a shake. "Aw, isn't he cute, Kinam! Cuter than a bug's ear." She grinned at Dwicky. "Can I keep him? I want one."

Dwicky laughed. "No, Fwenn, you can't have my Dib." He ruffled the boy's hair. He gave a quick glance to Trec before back to the woman. "I already have dibs on the Dib."

The excitement of the woman in front of him caused the nervous feeling in Dib to slowly leave, but it was Dwicky's hand through his hair that helped most, as well as his words. He looked up at the man and smiled a bit before he glanced back at each of the four people in front of him, raising a hand to wave weakly. "Hi..."

"I do believe we've already met." Trec waved anyway despite his words, but turned his attention on Fwenn afterwards. "Ya know, there's a whole pile of the ankle biters right behind us, Fwenn. Take your pick. I'm sure their parents won't even notice they're gone."

"I'm sure they'll notice a child or two missing, Trec. After they check the closet, that is." Kinam rolled his eyes.

"But this one is so much better than those ones in there. For one, he's not screaming and whining at the top of his lungs for his parents." Fwenn sifted through the bag she had over her shoulder. "Two, he looks like he's got some intelligence on him. Three, if Dwicky has him, he has to mean something." She made a happy noise as she found what she was looking for. "Ha! Here we are." She looked to Dwicky. "Can he have gum?"

Dwicky nodded with a grin. "Yea, sure. Go ahead." He nudged Dib forward.

Macks whistled. "So what's with the small, kicked puppy tailing you?" He scratched the back of his head.

"He's actually a patient of mine. I have him for the day. I'm sure Trec has already mentioned it." Dwicky glanced at Trec. "But it seems he's getting far more attention than I am, visiting after three years or so." He ran a hand through his hair and laughed.

Fwenn stopped happily petting Dib's head. She looked around shifty eyed. "Noooo."

"Trec told us you had some kind of client, but nothing specific." Kinam spoke up as he walked away from the wall and over towards Dib. "He did happen to say you were working at an institution, which is interesting." He leaned over, almost invading Dib's personal space.

Dib blinked his eyes, but didn't step back. He kept silent for a moment before he finally blew a bubble with his gum and popped it near Kinam's face, which caused the man to back off a bit.

The action caused a small bit of laughter to come from Trec's direction that the man tried to keep quiet.

Dwicky tried to hide his amusement by coughing into a fist. He cleared his throat. "So that means hands off, Kinam. I know you." He shook a no-no hand at the man. "No mentally dissecting the Dib. He's a normal person like you and I--"

"In Kinam's place, I'd beg to differ." Macks cut in with a snerk.

"--and deserves respect." Dwicky finished. "So be nice."

"So tell us about yourself, sweety." Fwenn smiled down at Dib. "How did you meet our long lost comrade here, 'Mister Dwicky'?"

The question caused Dib to stop chewing his gum and become rigid for a moment. His mind went over what to say before he could actually think up an answer and soon he was looking away as he fidgeted. "I knew him before at Skool. He was the counselor there, but only briefly." He glanced back at Fwenn. "It just so happens that when he came back and came to the asylum, I was there." That was a safe enough answer.

Kinam had walked back over to the wall, leaning against it once more as he crossed his arms. It was easy to tell he was a bit upset over the fact he wouldn't get to ask his own certain questions of Dib. The remark Macks made got him a shove to the side before Kinam settled completely once again, speaking up when Dib was done. "What a nice little reunion that must have been." There was obvious sarcasm.

Trec hid a smirk as he looked down at his feet. "Yeah, no kidding."

Macks stumbled into Trec with a laugh, patting the other's shoulder.

"Hmm. It was, for the most. For he's out now, and that's all that matters." Dwicky loosely gestured to Dib.

Fwenn straightened and narrowed her eyes at Dwicky and she sharply pointed at Dwicky. "You. Where have you been?? No calls, no letters, no postcards, no email or message of any sort." She shook her head. "If anything you should be cast from the group and replaced." The woman placed her hand on Dib's head, giving it a friendly pat as she leaned down to smile at him. "How would you like to replace Mister Dwicky, sweety? There's more gum in it for you." She offered the pack of gum to Dib.

"Aww... -hey wait a minute!" Dwicky pouted.

"Well, I do like this gum a lot." Dib took the pack from Fwenn before smiling apologetically up at Dwicky.

Trec had wrapped an arm around Macks' shoulder as the other had stumbled into him and kept it there for the moment. His eyes turned back on Dwicky and he grinned. "Aww, too bad Dwicky. I told you, you should have called."

"But I-" Dwicky stuttered.

"Too bad! Trade has been made! Deal is done and cast in stone!" Fwenn threw her arms around Dib and cuddled the boy happily. "We have our new group member. Soo cuute!"

"Sorry Dwicky." Macks waved at the man and laughed some. "You heard Fwenn and Trec. Don't worry, we'll raise him as if he were our very own."

Dwicky smirked wryly. "Some how I don't find that very comforting.. Four mommiess, no daddy."

"Hey now!" Kinam narrowed his eyes on Dwicky for a moment before he let out a harsh sigh and looked away.

Dib had let out a small laugh at Dwicky's words as well as Kinam's reaction. The attention he was receiving from Fwenn had him easing up completely. Instead of panicking like usual he allowed the bit of cuddling, feeling safe for the moment. He blew a bubble in Dwicky's direction, grinning at the man afterwards.

"Well, you've been with us for years Dwicky, and you turned out just fine." Trec grinned at those words.

"No I didn't- you just kicked me out. How does that make me fine?" Dwicky pouted more.

Fwenn laughed and continued to go back to petting Dib's head. "Aww, now we've made him sad. We'd talk about it but, you see, I'm off work. And I don't mix business with pleasure." She smiled sweetly.

Macks had slipped an arm around Trec's waist. "And sadly, the only thing I can do is check for tooth decay and gum recession." He shook his head. "But for three years let me just say- your smile looks great!" He gave a thumbs up.

"And it seems I'm banned from doing anything at the moment. So, you're on your own." Despite his bad mood, Kinam couldn't help the smirk that came to his lips.

Trec shook his head when all eyes turned on him just as quickly. "Don't look at me. I'm on a well needed break from children that want to bust my ear drums."

Dib turned his attention back to Dwicky and gave a small smile while he stayed near Fwenn. "Sorry."

Dwicky opened his mouth and quickly closed it. "Aww. C'mon guys. You know I'm sorry. I would have gotten in touch if I could. You know I would have."

Macks tapped his lips, glanced at Trec then back at Dwicky. "Newp."

"Aww… well, how about I buy myself into your good graces? Coffee? Colas? Mineral water?" Dwicky looked to Dib with a slight grin. "Cake?"

Dib looked away as he tried his best to hide the blush that wanted to creep onto his face considering the amount of people around. He suddenly didn't find the pack of gum quite as appealing anymore.

"Well, I am a little hungry." Kinam spoke the words as he looked up towards the high ceiling. "I haven't eaten since sometime before noon."

"That's not a bad idea." Trec pointed towards Dwicky with his free hand. "You can buy us all food to make up for your mistake of leaving without saying a word. Then maybe we'll think of taking you back in." He dropped his hand back down. "It depends on how we feel. By then Fwenn may just grow too attached to Dib, so best hurry." He smirked.

Fwen snuggled-snuggled Dib so very happily. "I'm going to take you home and feed you cookies."

"R-right." Dwicky quickly nodded. "So, what do you guys want?" He gave a weak laugh.

"Hmm. I want a burger." Macks patted his stomach. "Hmm. Maybe two."

"I'll have a sub." Kinam rolled his eyes as he looked away once more. "You guys can have the grease filled food in this place. I'll take a safer route."

Trec had moved his hand back up to mimic Kinam as he spoke, stopping only when the other man was finished talking. "You know me. I'm good for pizza." He shrugged his shoulders.

Dib turned his eyes away from Fwenn for a second to look back at Dwicky. He raised his hand, bouncing a bit on his feet to get the other's attention. "I want tacos!" With that said, he allowed Fwenn to continue babying him, still enjoying the attention.

"Pasta for me!" Fwenn waved a hand.

Dwicky blinked and glanced away. "Hmm... Do I really need friends that badly?" He tapped his lips. He glanced back and had four people glaring at him. "Er- yes! Right. Okay. Going." He looked back to Dib with a slight smirk. "Did you want to help me or stay here?"

Dib seemed to think about the question for a few seconds, but it was easy to tell he had already made up his mind by the small smile on his face. "I guess I'll go with you if you really do need the help."

Trec removed his arm from around Macks and stretched both above his head. "I should probably go along. That's a lot of food to carry, so I might as well."

Kinam glanced over at the other and blinked. "Trec, look behind you. Don't you remember a certain job you have?"

Trec waved a hand, dismissing the comment. "I told you that I'm on my break."

Macks snorted. "You said that more than an hour ago."

"Aww. I'll miss you little Dib monster." Fwenn gave the boy one last thorough cuddle before she let him go with Dwicky.

Dwicky smiled when Dib was back at his side and he ruffled the boy's hair.

"Humm. I might as well take a quick smoke while you guys are gone. Kinam's no company." Fwenn gave a teasing laugh as she dug through her bag.

Dwicky perked hearing that one word. "'Smoke', did you say?"

Dib frowned at that and poked Dwicky in the side with a finger harder than he really should have while glaring up at the man.

Trec noticed the interaction, but it was mostly Dwicky's words which caught him. "Don't tell me you started again?" He tsked before going on. "You quit after college and were much more successful than some people." He glanced over at Fwenn before he went on. "Why the sudden change?"

Fwenn stuck out her tongue at Trec.

"…Ow." Dwicky frowned and rubbed his side. "I dunno... I suppose it's a kinder, gentler, more self destructive way of dealing with stress. Better than taking a metal bat to the things that cause it." He looked at the package of cigarettes in Fwenn's hand longingly.

"It's a dirty habit. You shouldn't come back to it." Fwenn went back to fishing out her lighter.

Dwicky chewed the side of his lip, fidgeting a moment. "Just one smoke-- and then I'll go get the food."

"Great, now he's having a nicotine fit. Just what we need." Kinam shook his head. "He goes away for three years and comes back wanting to jump Fwenn for her cigarettes. Lovely. Next he'll be robbing the liquor store."

Dib narrowed his eyes a bit and looked away from Dwicky while crossing his arms.

Trec sighed and shook his head as he walked away from the wall and over to Dwicky and Dib. "Alright kids. Let's just go get some food." He reached over and took the gum from Dib so he could hand it to Dwicky instead. "I think you need this more than he does."

Dwicky looked at the gum disappointed. "Aww..." But all the same he turned around and started walking to the food court. "It's just not the same." He took out a piece, unwrapping it and popping it in his mouth to chew. "Mmm. It is good gum."

"Hurry up! I want processed meat on a bun, stat!" Macks shouted after them.

Trec waved a hand up at the shout, letting it drop back down to his side just as quickly. He moved along beside the two after a few seconds and kept silent until they were far enough away from the group. "You conveniently forgot to mention that you started smoking again. Is there anything else you didn't mention to me yesterday in the nice little amount of surprises you've given me lately?" He glanced at the two out the corner of his eyes.

The words caught Dib's attention and he quickly looked up at Trec, remembering in that moment that the man knew everything. Such a thing caused him to look back down just as quick as if the other would suddenly bite him.

Dwicky gave the other a sharp glare. "It wasn't high on my 'cause Trec's mind to become pudding' list, no." He gave a frustrated sound and shook his head. "I'm fine. Just a few smokes here and there, nothing big. I rather cover my lungs with tar than physically rip my hair out, thanks. I'll quit again... I don't see what's the big deal." He nudged Dib. "Really. I don't. I don't see anyone else cussing Fwenn out because of it." He knew his curt attitude was the craving talking, but he didn't care.

Dib just barely nodded his head at the words as well as the small nudge. Dwicky's attitude didn't really help calm him very much and he continued to keep his head down as he walked. Suddenly he thought it may have been a better idea to stay with the woman that wouldn't stop babying him.

Trec sighed as he moved a hand up to scratch at the back of his head. "Well, covering your lungs in tar isn't very healthy either, man." He shook his head as he let his hand drop back down. "Besides, Fwenn is pretty much a lost cause. You know that. She tried and failed three times before she just gave up. You never seemed like you would do it again." He shrugged his shoulders. "No need to get so snappy." He looked back at Dwicky. "Another reason why you should just stop. You're gonna get worse."

"Mmmm. Sorry." Dwicky murmured and he rubbed one arm in a guilty fashion. "I know. Disgusting habit, not very healthy; yet very legal. Funny, ain't it." He sighed, long and hard. "And this kiddo isn't very happy with me because of it." He rested a hand on Dib's head. Dwicky gave a sympathetic frown. "He doesn't look very happy with me right now." He smoothed down the boy's hair with his fingers.

Dib frowned for a moment before he glanced up at Dwicky. At the same time, he lifted one of his hands up to grab onto the man's own, taking it off of his head so he could link their fingers together. Once he had hold of Dwicky's hand, Dib looked ahead instead of down as he spoke up. "It doesn't matter. Whenever you decide to bring more of those things home I'll just drown them again."

Trec didn't seem the least bit bothered by the small display going on beside him. What really got a reaction out of him were Dib's words, which caused him to try and stop the laughter that wanted to come out. "He trashed your cigarettes?"

Dwicky felt a small prickle of nervousness but for the most, he let it slide. He narrowed his eyes on Dib with a smirk. "...He hid them on me. Drowned them in dish water I think. And now the kitchen sink stinks like soggy tobacco, even after I washed it a good few times. Soggy tobacco and bleach." He gave a half laugh. "He doesn't like the taste." He gave Dib's hand a small squeeze, giving the boy a nudge to his side by bumping it with his own. "Though he doesn't seem to mind the taste of hard liquor." Dwicky grinned some at that.

"It tastes much better than an ash tray. I thought we went over this before." Dib teased as he nudged Dwicky back, letting a small laugh escape him at the same time. "The sink will survive to live another day. Just think of how it had to live while you were gone." He looked up at the other as a small smirk came to his lips.

Trec whistled before a disgusted look came over his face. "He's right, ya know. Wow, your place must have reeked." He narrowed his eyes on Dwicky. "And yet you come to my place and lecture me about my mess. Ha!"

Dwicky rolled his eyes. "No. It didn't. I had a few cancer sticks, that was it. You two make it sound like I was drinking liquid mercury or fire or something. My life has enough drama without you two making me feel guilty for sucking down some road side tar." He shrugged. "Would you rather I be an alcoholic?" He glanced Dib's way with a very subtle suggestive smirk. "You didn't seem to mind that one time."

Dib averted his eyes as he tried to look as innocent as possible. "I was curious to see how it tasted, that's all and it turned out that it took more than one taste for me to find out." He glanced back at Dwicky. "It was one time. It will never happen again." He looked away once more as he mumbled under his breath. "Depending on the situation."

Trec couldn't help the grin that came to his lips at those words. "Well, this is a more interesting conversation. It definitely beats looking at baby pictures and being poked at about how much I need to grow up." He raised a brow. "Are you still feeling stressed, though? Did yesterday help at all when we talked?"

Dwicky nodded and he had to laugh at Dib's last quiet comment. He rubbed his mouth in thought, thinking something over before he looked to Trec. "You and Macks are still as friendly as ever to each other." His hand fell down to stroke at his goatee, raising a brow. "Figures you two wouldn't finally give in and hook up with each other." He pointed a finger at Trec, dabbing it in the air as he talked. "Let me guess... He's also seeing someone right now."

Trec narrowed his eyes on Dwicky before he looked ahead once more with a small shrug. "He might be." Which easily meant 'yes'. He stayed silent for a few seconds before he spoke up again, still keeping his eyes ahead. "It's no big deal, though. I told you that I don't need a relationship. Being friends with benefits is just fine with me."

Dib had stayed silent through the conversation, staying focused on where they were going. It was while the two were speaking that they finally entered the food court and that was when Dib let go of Dwicky's hand, more than happy to walk over and find the taco stand while the two talked.

"It's killing you isn't it? Or… at least it's gotta be killing Macks. He's cheating on whoever he's going out with and that's putting a strain on his relationship." Dwicky sighed, shutting his eyes for a moment as he pressed a finger to rub at his temple. "But you're not one to admit or own up to anything." He gave his friend a weak smirk. "I just hope you realize that one day your chance will be gone, and so will Macks when he goes his separate way with whoever he falls madly in love with." Dwicky paused and he pressed his lips into a thin line for a moment. "...He's always been waiting for you ya'know." Dwicky nudged his friend, as he smirked wryly. "To grow up."

Trec rubbed his side and couldn't help but whine. "Why does everyone keep saying that?" He looked back at Dwicky with a sigh. "What's wrong with wanting to have fun? We're not teenagers anymore, you know. It's better to keep having fun then wasting our life away doing normal everyday boring tasks like every other person in this city." He narrowed his eyes once again as he looked back towards the food court. "At least that's how I see it." He crossed his arms. "If Macks wants to have some normal stupid relationship with someone, than let him. Doesn't matter to me."

Dwicky's brows raised, and he shook his head. "Of course it doesn't, because you think he'll always be coming back; no matter who he's with. But someday soon he's going to say 'no' to your advances," he smirked "and your whole world and philosophy is going to come crashing down." Dwicky raised his hands with a shrug. "I don't understand how everyone else can see it but you're still turning a blind eye to it."

Those words didn't seem to help Trec's attitude, but it was obvious he was thinking about them. After a few moments he let out a sigh and started heading towards the same stand Dib had run off to. "Let's just get the food and get out of here. They're gonna complain if we take too long and I'd rather not hear Kinam's moaning and whining."

Dwicky patted Trec's back with sarcastic sympathy. "Last I remember, he moans and whines anyway." He spotted Dib and joined the boy once more. "Hey baby, figured out what you wanted?" He looked up to the menu and cracked his gum. He took out his wallet and siphoned some money from it, handing it to Trec. "Here, buy your pizza, and what Macks and Kinam wanted. I'll get Dib's, Fwenn's and mine." Dwicky looked up at the menu again. "I think I'll get tacos too."

Trec took the money with no real problem and mumbled under his breath as he started to walk off. "You have no problem buying all of us food, maybe we should mooch off you some more. Since you're so loaded and all."

Dib had watched Trec walk off before he turned his eyes back up towards Dwicky with a small smile. "I just want a taco salad and a soda." He looked back at ahead at the people preparing the food as he continued to speak up. "I'm glad you let me come see your friends. They're really nice." He moved his hands, trying to adjust the bag on his shoulders. "Especially Fwenn."

"Mmmm. I love taco salads." Dwicky turned his gaze down to Dib. He chuckled, teasing. "You're such a cuddle monger. I think if anyone cuddled and snuggled you, they'd be your very best friend." He toyed with the scythe lock of hair atop the boy's head. "I told you they're nice, didn't I." He smiled down at the boy. "But I'll have to agree with her, you're very cute. And if I'm not careful, she's going to steal you away."

Dib let out a small laugh and shook his head. "I don't think you have to worry. As much as I enjoy the attention, I'd much rather stay with you." He gave a teasing grin as he looked back at Dwicky. "It's just so much fun watching them poke fun at you and you don't really seem to mind it all that much." He moved his hand to take Dwicky's back once more. "You need to enjoy yourself too after all the worry and everything, right?"

The man's hand smoothed Dib's hair back and he gave a thin smile. "I've learned to be a patient man. But for now, taco salad and pasta for Fwenn." Dwicky tugged the boy to the counter and ordered to go. He paid and handed Dib his taco salad in its container, taking his own. He then tugged the boy over to get Fwenn's food next.

It was a bit longer that Trec caught up to them with three orders of food in his own arms while mumbling a few curses under his breath. As soon as he was close enough he shut up, considering Dib was near by and turned his snappy attitude towards Dwicky. "You know, next time they can get their own food. The people that serve this stuff are morons."

Dib bowed his head to hide his laughter, not wanting to anger Trec further by letting it out. Instead he kept his attention on the container he held.

"Hey, you got a free meal out of this, don't complain. Now let's get going, before Kinam whines Fwenn into smoking a whole pack. At least Macks is there if she decides to punch him in the teeth." Dwicky chuckled as he lead the way back to where they had been.

Trec snorted. "You just want to hurry and get back because you're afraid she _will_ smoke that whole pack and leave you nothing." Either way he followed along, letting Dib walk in front of him to walk beside Dwicky.

When they got to their destination no one was there but Macks lounging on the mall bench in front of the day care. He waved and grinned Trec's way.

"Hey Trec, your boss stopped by, he said you're fired --and that you have early morning shift." Macks had to cackle. "Blew it again, buddy."

Dwicky gave an amused snort and placed the food he was holding beside his friend on the bench. "It figures." He dusted his hands off, trying not to look too conspicuous as he glanced around. "I'm gunna.., go get Fwenn.., and Kinam." He tried to oh so casually stroll towards the door.

"Damnit..." Trec let out a groan, but before he could dwell on his own problems too much Dwicky's words stopped him and he shot out a hand to grab the other man's arm. "No way. You are staying here and waiting for them until they come back. They're big kids. They can handle themselves."

Dib narrowed his eyes on Dwicky for a moment before shaking his head. He walked over to the man and gave him a small push while Trec still had a hold of his arm. "Sit down and eat." With that said he moved away from the two and walked to the bench to start on his own food.

Dwicky groaned a whine. "Why is the whole world against me?" He glared holes through Trec's face. "You're mean. And nasty. And spiteful. And... uh... you smell." He blinked a few times and looked towards the door. It was then he decided he'd try to walk to the door anyway with his human anchor still on his arm.

Macks whistled. "Dwicky's back on his nicotine fix. Never thought I saw the day." He nudged Dib's shoulder to get the boy's attention, pointing to Dwicky after. "This guy practically went through a pack a day." He laughed. "More than that when it came to cramming for exams."

Dib blinked his eyes at the information he was given while chewing on the bit of food in his mouth. He turned his eyes back towards Dwicky and shook his head. As soon as he was able to, he finally spoke up. "You should stop before you become just as addicted a second time." He narrowed his eyes once more at Dwicky before turning his attention back down to his food.

Trec dug his feet into the floor to try and keep hold of Dwicky and drag him back to the bench. "See! Even your own client has more sense than you, and he's just a kid..."

"Teenager!" Dib's voice broke through.

"Teenager..." Trec corrected himself while turning his eyes back to shoot a dirty look towards Dib. "Thanks for reminding me."

Dwicky whined as he was dragged back to the bench and plunked down beside Dib. "It isn't fair." He slumped back, plainly grumpy about the whole situation. He picked up his taco salad and removed the lid, fishing out the fork to stuff food in his face instead. "...At least the taco salad isn't too bad."

Macks tsked and claimed his burgers. "Better keep an eye on that one." he spoke to Dib as he unwrapped his burger. "He'll smooth talk you into anything without you even realize it. He's subtle in his manipulations and suggestions." He laughed sharply. "S'what makes him a decent counselor." He promptly took a big bite out of his burger.

Dib looked at Macks out the corner of his eyes when the words were said, despite the food that was halfway out his own mouth. He quickly chewed it up while giving a quick glance to Dwicky then letting his eyes fall back down to his bowl, trying to push away the sudden hurtful things that had been said in his mind over the past couple of days. "I think he's been a pretty decent counselor without having to manipulate me." Although he gave a small smile, it still seemed a little forced.

Trec raised a brow at Dib's sudden change in attitude. It was like some weird switch that had been tuned in the boy. He glanced at Dwicky to see if the other noticed before picking up his food and taking a seat beside Macks.

Dwicky paused, having put a mouthful of lettuce and cheese in his mouth. He looked from Macks to Dib to Trec than back to Dib again and finally to his food. He chewed his food before speaking. "Now wait a tick-"

"No no, don't you see? A counselor is just a person who convinces you to make certain choices to get the results they want. It's just basically a person who tells you what to do with your life and then gets paid for it." Macks laughed meanly. "That's why I didn't want to be one. It isn't helping people, it's bossing them around." A swift smack came to his head. "Ow!"

"Hey, you tell idiots to brush their teeth when that common sense to brush regularly would steal from your paycheck because there's no cavities to fill." Fwenn scoffed. "Really, Macks, your respect for others astounds me." She crossed her arms.

"Well, at least people aren't picking on me anymore." Trec picked up his pizza and bit into the slice as he watched the confrontation.

Kinam had walked back in behind Fwenn and taken his sub from the pile of food left for them both. He leaned back against the wall and looked towards Trec after the other spoke. "I wouldn't mind still dissecting you." A harsh glare from Trec shut him up just as quickly.

Dib picked at his food a bit before he looked up towards Macks, deciding to speak up. It was easy to tell he was nervous, though. "Mister Dwicky," That felt so strange to say. "isn't like that. He actually likes helping me. Even when I have problems that are really difficult, he still wants to help me. My other doctors were never like that. They never cared about me." He shrugged and turned back to his food, picking more at it than eating it.

"Yea!" Dwicky piped up with a mouth full of taco salad.

"Yea!" Fwenn seconded and thwacked Macks on the head once more for good measure before she went to pick up her pasta. "Awww. Dwicky still knows how I like my pasta." She pressed her cheek against the lid of the container. She sat herself between Dib and Macks, pushing the man aside with a smirk.

Macks skooched over and rubbed his head. "Oww.. that's abuse you know. A hate crime!"

Fwenn smiled at Dib and hiked a thumb to point at Macks. "Ignore him, he doesn't know a thing he talks about. He's a dropout. He has no right to go on as he does." She nudged the man in gesture.

Dib looked up at Fwenn and gave a small smile. The interaction between the two and words spoken to him had helped a bit and it was easy to tell Dib wasn't half as upset as before. "It's alright." He turned his eyes towards Macks and a tiny grin came to his lips. "I'll learn to ignore him from now on."

"Oh come on." Trec leaned over to get a better look at the others since he was on the far end. "Just because Macks is a dentist now doesn't mean he still can't mess with people's heads. Cut him some slack."

Kinam raised a hand and shook his head. "No, I think once you mess with teeth then you give up the right to mess with a person's brain." He glanced towards Macks. "Of course, I never liked dentists. So, you probably shouldn't listen to me." He bit into his sub.

"Sadly, I second what Kinam said." Fwenn raised a hand, slurping noodles off her fork after.

"Oh I don't know.." Dwicky started glancing away. "Maybe he could part time as a counselor." He pointed at Macks sharply "A i camp /i counselor."

Macks' jaw went slack. "Ouch, man. Ouch. Man, I felt that one. Ugh." He shuddered.

Dib laughed at that, but quickly quieted himself by stuffing his mouth with lettuce before he could receive any dirty looks from Macks.

"No, wait a minute. What about that weird little magic trick he can do." Trec raised a free hand and waved it in front of his own face, back and forth. "I always thought that was pretty cool. He used to practice it all the time in college before he dropped out." He nudged Mack's in the side. "Remember?"

Kinam rolled his eyes. "If you actually believe in that hypnosis stuff then no wonder you have a mall job. That stuff never works." A disgusted look came over his face as he picked a pickle off his sandwich. "At least not for me."

"That's because only seventy percent of people can be hypnotized at some level. Within that group, about thirty percent in the low range, sixty percent in the middle. Only ten percent are _really_ hypnotizable." Macks grinned at Kinam. "Of course you can't hypnotize someone against their will. Again, it's all about the power of suggestion and how willing someone's mind is to accept it. And you're far too stubborn to listen to anyone, Kinny." He shrugged loosely. "That's the only part I really found interesting in skool. Course that's more of a shrinks line of work, and that's just too much skooling for just one thing that I'm particularly good at. I'm more of a smiles kinda guy." He gave a toothy grin.

"He's eerily good at it." Dwicky commented to Dib.

Dib blinked his eyes and looked from Dwicky, back to Macks'. He actually found such a thing interesting and couldn't help listening. His curiosity caught up in the conversation.

Trec rolled his eyes and leaned back on the bench to finish his slice of pizza. "Man, your talent is wasted on teeth. You and I both know you're good at making people confess with that little trick. You should just use that and go with it."

"Oh I'm pretty sure Macks is making better money than you right now, Trec. You shouldn't worry about him." Kinam ignored the next glare shot at him.

"Confess, huh? Yea. I guess I could make certain people confess." Macks gave Trec a certain look before he covered it up with a laugh. "I would love to hear Kinam confess some deep, dark inner secret. Like a secret love for men in pink lacy lingerie, or that he's totally and utterly jealous of my talents and that it kills him to know they're going to waste."

Fwenn nearly choked as she laughed while she was eating. She quickly swallowed and gasped a laugh. "C'mon, Macks, I'm trying to eat here. Please don't kill me."

"Oh yeah, that's really funny." Kinam rolled his eyes as pure sarcasm dripped from his voice. "I'm not letting you near me."

Trec had glanced away once Macks looked at him. He hardly even laughed at what the other said. After there was silence once more he pointed a finger towards Dwicky without looking at the other. "Maybe you can get Dwicky to confess where he's been for three years. The guy won't tell me squat."

Dib's head shot up at that and he looked away from his nearly empty bowl to turn his attention on Dwicky.

"You really need to listen, Trec. I said: I went traveling with friends." Dwicky raised his voice with the last part, giving a slight look of amused aggravation.

"What friends?" Fwenn piped up.

"New friends."

"From where?" Macks spoke up.

"New friends I had met near Dib's skool." Dwicky shot Macks a dirty look.

"Oh-ho, the plot thickens." Macks began to grin.

"No-no. There is no plot and it's not getting thick." Dwicky busied himself by eating his food.

"Touchy." Macks glanced at Trec.

"That's the nicotine withdrawal." Fwenn pointed out assuredly with a fork.

"Dwicky is seeing other people behind our backs. What a shame." Trec sighed as if the news truly hurt him. "And here I thought we were his one and only real friends." He grinned as he looked towards Kinam. "Of course, having Kinam as a friend, I don't really blame him."

Kinam narrowed his eyes, but let the comment slide as he turned his attention towards Dib. Not being able to figure the boy out on his own, he still wanted to ask questions anyway. "What about Dib? Has he been hypnotized?" He raised a brow. "I'm sure it didn't work if he has."

Dib leaned over to look at Kinam. "No, no one has ever hypnotized me. If they have I don't remember it. Usually the doctors would say they were going to do something before doing it, though." He shrugged. "Well, unless it involved medication, needles, stuff like that. But that was when I was being too out of control." He went right back to his food after speaking as if he had just said the most normal thing in the world.

Dwicky seemed to have forgotten his food, he was thinking something over. "...Does it help? Hypnosis I mean."

Macks shrugged. "Well, I haven't looked too deeply into it. Scientifically it's very debatable. Usually it's used for regression back into one's past. You go back through your memories, find the time and situation that caused the trauma. Once you find the root you simply rip the issue right out of its mental soil."

"Ugh… Such a delicate touch." Fwenn snorted.

Dwicky looked back down to his food and didn't say anything more.

Trec glanced over between Dwicky and Dib for a quick second before he shrugged, speaking up after Fwenn's words. "Well, delicate or not, if it has at least a chance of helping then there's no real harm in such a thing, right?"

Kinam finished off his sub and spoke up once his mouth was no longer full. "That's what normal counseling is for. So people won't have to be reduced to stupid tricks."

"But what if normal counseling sometimes isn't enough?" Trec glanced over at Kinam and it seemed to silence the other.

"You seek psychiatric help." Dwicky spoke up rather solemnly.

Fwenn looked over at Dwicky, the tone caused her brows to furrow. "Working on it. Getting to that level. I'll write a book and change the world, you'll see." She wagged a finger. "There's more than one way to unravel the brain."

"It's all about finding the method to the madness." Macks wiggled his fingers giving a wide evil grin.

Dib looked over at Macks and blinked. "That's creepy. Don't do that." With that said he placed a forkful of food in his mouth and chewed.

Trec fidgeted for a moment before he made up his mind and stood up from the bench while wiping his hands on his pants. With a few steps, he walked over to Dwicky and grabbed the man's arm as he spoke up. "Fwenn, give the guy a cigarette before he explodes. I'll keep him company outside for the time being." It was the best excuse, but the narrowed eyes Dib looked at him with caused him to stumble on his words. "And make sure he doesn't smoke anymore afterwards."

"Riight… explode." Dwicky blinked a few times as had been yanked up to stand.

Fwenn raised a brow but all the same she went digging through her bag and took out a cigarette and handed it to Dwicky, along with a lighter.

Dwicky looked at the objects as if they were foreign, but then he clutched them tightly soon after; there would be no getting them out of his hands now that he had them. He then headed towards the door without Trec's prompt.

Fwenn popped a stick of gum in her mouth and shook her head. "Never feed a habit, it'll eat you alive. But now I have the Dib all to myself!" She happily wrapped her arms around Dib and cuddled him once more.

Once outside, Trec led them both to a shady spot where there were few people walking around. He kept his eyes on the ones that were heading inside the mall and when they were out of sight he turned his attention to Dwicky as he started speaking. "Don't you think the whole hypnotizing deal sounds a little appealing? Especially for someone schizo, like say, Dib for example." He nudged Dwicky in the side a little as he eyed the man carefully.

Dwicky flicked the lighter as he held the cigarette between his lips. It wasn't till he'd taken a long deep inhale and breathed out a slow jet of smoke from his mouth and gave a pleased sigh did he pay attention to Trec. He held the cigarette between two fingers, glancing at his friend. "I think it sounds dangerous. There's a lot going on in that head of his, I don't want to make things worse." He took another puff of the smoke, blowing air into the wind; fleeting, how fitting. "Dibs been through countless traumas, more stressful situations than you can imagine. There is no 'one event' that broke him. It was many, many disappointments until his father couldn't take it anymore and threw him in an asylum. Then his mind just snapped." Dwicky snapped his fingers and then took another drag, rubbing his temple with a finger that held the cigarette. "He might have been hearing them when we first met, I don't know..." He closed his eyes and gave a tired sigh. "…I really don't know."

Trec frowned and leaned back against a nearby pillar. "Even if all of that is so, you have to find some way to help him as best you can, Dwicky. He looks okay, yeah, sure, but who knows what can go through his mind at any moment. Pills can only do so much. You know how cracked out schizophrenics can become." He looked out towards the parking lot. "Besides, you know Macks just as well as you've known me. If anything serious were to happen during the whole thing, I'm sure he wouldn't let it continue." He looked back at Dwicky.

The man seemed to pale and he froze. The cinder burned away at the tip of the cigarette and the ash fell. Dwicky didn't look back at Trec, he was too affixed on the nothing ahead. "...Macks will find out."

Trec raised a brow, but quickly shook his head as he looked back towards the parking lot again. "I don't know. He would be looking for trauma. Not the best moments Dib has recently have." He shrugged. "Besides, even if it does come up I'm sure you'll have nothing to worry about. We'll talk it over like you did with me and everything will be fine."

"Trec!" Dwicky thoroughly shook his head. "I don't want _everyone_ to know about -ya'know.. That. I can't. We don't even know if he's hypnotizable, let alone if it'll help. Macks isn't a trained professional-- he's a _dentist_, Trec! A _dentist_!" He started to pace, taking more drags from his cigarette to calm his frazzling nerves; but it only made him more uppity.

Trec followed Dwicky with his eyes, letting the other man have his small breakdown much like before, until he finally spoke up. "Listen, I can handle Macks. You don't need to worry about him. Really." He moved away from the pillar to stand straight once more. "And so what if he's a dentist? It doesn't mean he still doesn't know some stuff. You heard him back there. He was spouting off statistics like it was still his major."

Dwicky narrowed his eyes on Trec, and it seemed as if he were to make a mean spiteful comment back, but the look fell just as quickly to something far more tired, giving in. "...When was the last time he hypnotized someone? Especially this big." He rubbed his brows giving an exhausted sigh. "…Making someone cluck like a chicken is quite different than cognitive divulging." His brows furrowed and he spoke in a weaker voice "…I don't know what I'd do if…-" He turned away and took a slow drag, taking just a few steps to no where.

Trec gave Dwicky a sympathetic look before he glanced upwards as he tried to think over the question. "Something as big as this he hasn't done in well over a year. Considering it's not his main job he doesn't do the stuff often, but he did do it for someone that was going through a lot of trouble." He looked back at Dwicky while moving a hand up to scratch at his arm. "He told me they had a lot of messed up things in their head, but in the end everything turned out for the better." He kept a careful eye on Dwicky's back. "I'm sure he'll have the same result with Dib."

Dwicky didn't answer. The thin wisps of smoke curled from in front of him. Then thoughtful smoke rings came to follow. Finally Dwicky turned around to face Trec. "...He's going to be on medication his entire life. Missing even one dose, he can't interact with the world properly. He hears things... Voices I guess. They tell horrible things I can't even begin to imagine." He shook his head as if it were the weight of the world. "It makes me sick, Trec." He watched the ash from the end of the cigarette fall to the concrete. "One of these days something's going to happen and I won't be there. Or I can't. It's happened before." He let out a small tortured sound. "You said so yourself, Trec. He looks twelve and sometimes he's in the same mentality. He's missed a vital part in his physical and mental growth by being in that asylum for those three years." Dwicky took a long drag, holding it in as he raked a hand through his hair, letting it out in one big smoky exhale. "I dunno who's most messed up, him, or me for loving him."

Trec leaned back heavily against the pillar after all of the information he had just been told registered with him. "Wow..." It was the only word he could speak out loud for a good while before he turned wide eyes back on Dwicky and let out a sigh. "It's weird. He doesn't even seem all that bad off." He shook his head before resting it against the pillar as well. "But, it's exactly like I told you. You need to find any means possible to help him. You want him to get better and get out of that mess. I'm sure you don't want him to stay stuck like that for the rest of his life. I know you don't." He finally walked away from his spot and near Dwicky, stopping in front of the other. "And you aren't messed up for loving him. You're caring about him and that's one thing he actually needs, right?"

Dwicky gave a weak nod. He stared at his cigarette for a moment before he glanced at his friend. "Any means... necessary. But I'm also not going to ruin a good thing. He's so happy now. Everything is going so well." He bit his lip. It was obvious he was torn between the two choices. Finally he caved. "...Alright. But only if he wants to." He took another drag, close to nearly smoking the filter; he didn't care. He exhaled smoke as he talked "But you prep and take care of Macks. I can't go over everything a second time. Not without falling apart worse. Tell him what he needs to know. But make sure he knows just how delicate this is." He held Trec in a firm glance. "Because if anything goes wrong, and anything happens to Dib...-I'm not a violent person but goddamn I'll kill you both with my bare hands." That said he flicked the filter away and firmly snubbed the embers out.

Trec quickly held up his hands in defense after Dwicky spoke and gave a shaky laugh. "Alright, I get it." He dropped them back down and shook his head. "Just try not to worry yourself so much. You did that before and look what happened." He placed a hand on Dwicky's shoulder and started to lead the other back inside. "Now come on, before Dib thinks I let you sneak off to buy a whole pack. I don't need a new hole glared into my head, thanks."

"...I wish you did." Dwicky sighed, giving his mouth a rub before he stepped in the door. He was going to get flak from Dib, and he was not looking forward to it.

The scene they had left hadn't changed much. Fwenn was still cuddling Dib but now the boy suddenly had a large cookie in his hands; the woman must have bought it while they were gone, or much to Kinam's chagrin, she made him fetch it.

Macks was stretched out beside her, looking horribly bored as Kinam went about something mindless that he didn't care to listen to.

As soon as Dib caught sight of the two, his eyes narrowed much as they had before the two left. Instead of getting up to walk towards Dwicky, he stayed where he sat next to Fwenn and went back to enjoying his cookie, ignoring the man for the moment.

"Ouch." Trec mumbled the word under his breath before he walked away from Dwicky to make his way back to the bench, slapping at Macks' shoulder for the other to move and let him sit back down.

Macks blinked a few. "Mph. Didn't see you come in." He skootched over and flopped on Trec when the man sat down, giving a yawn after. "...Why do people keep hitting me..."

Dwicky didn't take his very gracefully and he went to lean against the wall beside Kinam. He gave a long sigh. "Go ahead Kinam... psycho-whatever me. I know you're chompin' at the bit. Just go and get it out of yer system." He slid down the wall to fall to a crumpled seated position.

"Aww." Fwenn looked at Dwicky. "I think someone else needs a cookie too."

Kinam looked down at Dwicky and raised a brow. "I think he needs more than a cookie." He turned his attention on Fwenn. "What kind of cigarettes are you carrying? He looks worse than he did going out there."

Dib frowned at that and regretted acting so harsh. He shifted around a bit, moving away from Fwenn to stand up off the bench and with a few steps he made his way beside Dwicky to slide down the wall beside the man. He broke what was left of his cookie apart and handed over one part while turning his eyes on Dwicky.

"Thanks, kiddo..." Dwicky took the cookie and idly gnawed on it

Fwenn looked over to Trec. "Okay, what did you do to Dwicky?" She scowled at him and reached over Macks to poke at the man several times. "Fess up. There's something going on between you two that you aren't telling."

Dwicky chewed even slower on his cookie piece.

Trec shook his head. "I didn't do anything." He rubbed at the spot Fwenn had poked at. "Why do you people always think I did something? I can be innocent too, ya know."

"I have yet to see that." A smirk came to Kinam's face after he spoke the words.

Dib kept his eyes on Dwicky despite the conversation going on. He nibbled on his cookie for a few minutes before he finally raised a hand and tugged on Dwicky's shirt, leaning over a bit so Dwicky could hear him. "What's wrong?"

Dwicky raised his head, glancing at his friends but they were busy making verbal (and physical) jabs at each other. He leaned a little closer to Dib so only he could hear him. "We need to talk…" He licked his dry lips, they tasted like stale smoke. He glanced away a quick second. "…How do you feel about... mmm" he hesitated before going on "being hypnotized?"

The question wasn't something Dib was expecting and it had him blinking his eyes a few times before he looked back down at the cookie in his hand. "I don't know." When he spoke up his voice was still just as quiet. "I've never really thought about it all that much. I guess it wouldn't really bother me." He gave a small shrug. "It would be like talking things out, right? I'd just be under and not really know what I'm saying." He gave a smile as he looked back at Dwicky. "I don't think I would mind it."

"…Macks will be doing it, and Trec will be there. And so will I. Macks will be asking you questions... going back in your memory. So… he'll know about..-about us too, probably." Dwicky's gaze fell heavily to the floor. "But if we can unwrap a few kinks in your subconscious by bypassing your conscious mind… I- I dunno. Trec..." He raised his gaze back up. "It's up to you. Macks has a knack for this thing, despite having a major in teeth. Heh. But I guess a few questions can't hurt. I'd be there, and I'd never let anything happen to you." He raised a hand to brush a nudge against Dib's chin.

Dib chewed at his lip for a few moments. A few of Dwicky's words worried him. The fact that another person would know their secret was the only real thing stopping him from agreeing completely to the entire thing. It was a chance to be able to get well, but at a price. Trec had been fine with it, but Dib was afraid to take another chance. The thought caused him to move closer to Dwicky and rest his head against the man's arm as if someone would steal him away at that very moment. "I want to get better, but I don't want to risk you getting in trouble. Would he be okay with it like Trec was?"

Dwicky let his arm slip over Dib's shoulder, letting the boy lean closer on him. He eventually gave a small nod. "Him and Trec are pretty tight. Macks is understanding, hell, he's closest friends with Trec. Macks would know not to say anything. It would probably just take him a little longer to accept... But Trec will make sure he's alright. He's got it under control.. I trust these people." He gave a small weak chuckle. "Okay, everyone but Kinam." he gave a small playful poke to Dib's stomach.

Dib laughed at that, as well as the poke, and couldn't help flinching considering he was ticklish. Once he settled down again, he cuddled close to Dwicky while looking back up at the man. A smile came back to his face as he spoke up. "I'll try it. If it's something that can actually help me get better than I want to do it."

Dwicky ruffled Dib's hair before burying his fingers in it and resting his head atop the boy's. "Alright... we'll give it a try." He let his eyes shut, his sigh ruffling the boy's hair. "Hopefully it'll help..."


	39. Sessions 39

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** R  
**Warnings:** Violence and intense smooching  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Heartless7

Chapter 39

Everything had been setup with a final okay from Macks, which was why the next day brought Dwicky and Dib to Macks' home. Unlike the other two, Macks had his own place, and it was that which Dib had been staring up at for the past few minutes. He was still nervous about the ordeal. Not for his own sake, but for the risk Dwicky was taking for what he might say. Skeets was held tightly to his chest instead of in his bag much like the day before. He needed all the comfort he could get at the moment. Dwicky had told him Trec was already inside, having pointed to a car parked near their own, and knowing that eased Dib a little.  
After a bit longer Dib finally took a deep breath and looked away from the door in front of them to turn his attention up at Dwicky. "I'm alright now." He moved a hand away from Skeets to hold onto Dwicky's own for the few moments they hand left outside. "Let's do it."

Dwicky gave a small nod before he gave a firmer one. He gave Dib's hand a squeeze but decided he much rather suddenly hug the boy instead. He nuzzled his cheek atop the boy's head, burying his nose and lips in the boy's hair. "I'll be there... the entire time." he muffled for Dib's reassurance, but it was mostly to affirm his own worried mind. "And anytime you want to stop, just say so. Okay? I won't mind. I know you're brave, but for any reason… ya'know." He placed a kiss atop the boy's head to shut himself up.

Every bit of tension Dib felt slowly melted away as he leaned back in Dwicky's hold. He nodded his head at the other's words, but decided to speak up as well. "I know. If I ever feel like it's too much to handle, I promise I won't try to go on. I'll let him know to stop." He let out a small sigh before he went on. "I just want to be rid of everything."

Dwicky nodded in understanding. "I know. I know you do. I do too. I hope this works. God I hope it helps some how." He leaned back so he could look down at Dib, and he brushed back the dark hair that he messed up and smiled weakly down at him. "Alright. Let's do it." He finally stepped back from Dib and rung the door bell.

Macks answered not too long after and he grinned in greeting at each of them. "Dwicky. Squirt. I thought you two were going to sit outside in your car all day. S'bout time." He stepped aside to let them in, shutting the door after. "We'll be doing it in my study. It's comfortable, and quiet." He lead them to the room, Trec was waiting in. The room looked exactly like its namesake; lounging couches, the walls lined with several important looking books or all sorts, a main desk with a computer sitting atop it.

When they entered Trec looked up from the couch he was lying on, but didn't bother to get up. The only part of his body he moved was a hand to wave at the two. "Hey." His eyes seemed to dart over Dwicky's face for a few minutes to try and find the same worry that had been there when they talked outside the mall, before he looked away once again to lounge away on the couch.

Dib didn't even seem to notice Trec's greeting. He was too busy looking around at everything in the room. It was something to take his mind off of what was soon to happen, so he took the distraction for as long as he could. His main focus a few of the books on the shelves.

There were text books, a series of encyclopedias, books on anatomy, philosophy, psychology, the cognitive mind and several thesis and research books written by famous people Dib had never heard of. For a dentist, there were almost the same amount of books about the mind inside of ones head than the teeth in it, though the cola memorabilia and knick knacks ruined the serious display of all around.

Macks looked from Trec to Dwicky, taking a small glance at Dib before he scratched his head. "... It's like someone died." He shook his head. "So solemn, serious and somber." He clapped his hands. "Alright! Let's get started. You." He pointed to Trec. "Off the couch." He grabbed some large throw pillows to put at one end to make it more comfortable to be lounged on. "You." Macks pointed to Dib. "Make yourself comfortably reclined here."

Trec groaned as he got up off the couch and narrowed his eyes on Macks. "Great way to put it. I'm sure you're making things much better." Of course the words were only mumbled as he walked by the other to stand near one of the shelves.

Dib fidgeted for a moment as he looked at each of them and then towards the couch. With a heavy sigh, he finally walked over and set Skeets aside as he climbed on top of the couch to lay down, resting his head back on the pillows.

Dwicky stood by Trec, it was obvious to see he was apprehensive and he was failing to try and hide it. He wouldn't stop fidgeting.

"Alright. Good. Now- how I like my hypnosis is how I my like S I like to have a safety word. Unlike most hypnotists who snap, I like to utter a word to snap you out of your trance. Usually a word that has a positive significant meaning, that definitely brings a good memory. This word should hold with it a sense of security and safety." Macks shrugged with his hands. "Fr some,they choose the name of their dog, or their parents." He blinked and picked up the ladybug plush just noticing it. "Hey, this is cute."

"Yeah, I wonder where he could have gotten something so cute." After he spoke the words, Trec nudged Dwicky in the side with a smirk, trying to lighten the other's mood at least a little.

"That's Skeets." Dib turned his eyes away from Macks and towards the plush the man held. "I got him on a shopping trip." He turned his attention back on Macks, twisting his hands a bit as he continued to speak. "He helps me sometimes when I'm scared and there's no one else around." He turned his attention down to his hands and quickly stopped moving them when he realized how much he was twisting his shirt. "He could be my safety word."

"Fwenn would find this absolutely adorable." Macks gave the plush back to Dib, resting it on his chest. "Skeets it is then."

Dwicky nodded slowly looking from Trec to Dib. "Good word choice." he quietly spoke up.

"Alright, we're good to go then. Gentlemen, if you would take a seat there. And I don't have to tell you no talking." Macks gestured to some chairs as he pulled his a wooden chair over near the couch beside Dib. "We want an air of calm. Standing means tension, and we want this room to be relaxed, get some good chi going." He sat down on the chair, looking to Dib. "Just relax, Dib. Breathe slowly in and out. Let all the tension melt from your muscles until you feel warm and calm." Macks let his voice fall softer but not quieter, gentle but quite firm. "Ignore everything else. Push everything out of your mind, and just listen to my voice... Breathe in... breathe out. Tell me when you feel completely relaxed."

Dib did exactly as told and began to listen to Macks' voice and only that as he tried his best to calm down. He stopped fidgeting and let his hands fall down as he started to relax, breathing in and out slowly. It took a while, as he kept his gaze on the ceiling, before he finally spoke up again. The shaky tone gone from his voice. "Alright, I'm relaxed."

"Good." Macks affirmed. He continued on in the same soft tone. "Now, I'm going to count backwards. As I'm counting backwards I want you to do exactly as I say, listening to my voice and only to my voice. With each number you will feel more.. and more relaxed." He paused a moment before going on with gentle authority that was far more significant in tone. "Five: Your feeling more relaxed and calm, so relaxed that your lids are feeling very, very heavy; like you're very, very sleepy. Let them fall closed. When you close them, you feel even more relaxed, as if you've shed a heavy coat, leaving you free to sink deeper into your calm."

Dib's eyes slowly slipped closed and his body went even limper.

"Four: Your breath gently flows in and out... in and out. Breathing out the tension, you fill your lungs with clean air; breathing out the tension.. You're breathing out the tension. You feel very warm, and very light."

The heavy breaths Dib took started to become slow and even as the words were said.

"Three: You can feel your heart beat slow down.. to a nice, slow comfortable pace. Your pulse slows, and all your worries drift away and disappear like mist, leaving you very, very relaxed and at peace. Two: the world around you fades to nothing. You can hear nothing around you but my voice. You are in a place of utter peace, where nothing matters but your slow easy breath and the sound of my voice. One: You feel yourself slip below consciousness, like slipping into a pleasantly cool pool of water. You're slipping lower and lower, deeper into yourself; still calm, still relaxed."

On the outside Dib continued to keep still and calm and more relaxed as each word was said, his body never moving an inch.

Dwicky's brows furrowed and he bit firmly on his tongue to keep from talking. All he could do was watch and listen.

Macks glanced back and nodded that he was going to continue. He looked back to Dib. "Alright, Dib, I want you to listen closely to what I have to say next, it's very, very important. The safety word is 'Skeets'. When I say that word I want you to wake up, pushing nice and easy back to consciousness. When you wake up you'll feel nice, refreshed and energized. Do you understand this?"

"Yes." It was the only quiet word that left Dib after the question.

Trec's attention turned from Dib over to Dwicky. Noticing how on edge his friend was, he lifted a hand to place it on the other's shoulder, gripping firmly, before he looked back at Dib.

"Good. Now, I'm going to ask you some simple questions to start with. They're very easy, but you can take your time if you're not sure. First, tell me your name, your age and where you currently are." Macks paused to let Dib's mind digest and speak.

It took a few moments before Dib actually opened his mouth to speak up again. His voice just as quiet and calm as before. "My name is Dib, I'm fourteen, and I'm on the couch in the study."

Macks turned with a grin back to Trec and Dwicky, giving them a thumb's up. "It worked. You don't have to worry about being quiet now, he can't hear you. Now it's only a matter of asking the right questions." He turned back to Dib. "That's very good Dib. Now I'm going to ask a little tougher question, though I'm sure you'll answer it just as quick. Can you tell me what makes you happy? Why don't you tell me of a recent time you were very happy."

Dwicky's color rose to his face and he gripped the cushion of the couch he sat on so tightly his knuckles went white.

Trec clicked his tongue as he turned his eyes away. He raised a hand up to scratch at the back of his head, knowing what would more than likely come next, and hoping things blew over well enough for the moment.

It didn't take long at all for Dib to answer. "Being with Dwicky makes me happy. When I was outside with him and we didn't care about anyone else or hiding. I was really happy."

"Hiding?" Macks blinked and looked back at the others. "Hiding?"

Dwicky seemed to pale, going rather lax, and he gave a weak shrug. "…It isn't that important." he was barely able to speak the words, his smile was even weaker.

"I see." Macks turned back to Dib. "That's good Dib. That's a good memory to remember. It makes you feel really good, and safe doesn't it? I want you to keep that memory as a marker, a starting point. So that if you feel scared or worried I'll tell you to go to that happy memory. Do you understand?"

"Yes, I understand." Dib spoke up once more when he was asked the question.

Trec let out a sigh and sat back in his chair. He let his hand fall back down as he turned his eyes back on Dib. Glad that the incident had been avoided for the time being.

"Good." Macks continued. "Alright, now I'm going to ask you a similar question like the one before. Can you tell me what makes you very angry? Tell me a time that you were recently very angry."

It took Dib much longer to answer than before. "Being lied to. A few days before I got out of the asylum I got really mad because I thought I was being lied to again. It made me angry and caused me to say really hateful things."

"Being lied to can be a very hurtful thing... I know." Macks sympathized, resisting the urge to glance back. "Now, can you tell me what makes you very sad? Tell me a time that you were recently very sad."

"The thought of being alone makes me sad. Dwicky and I were talking recently and I was upset at the thought of such a thing. I didn't have anyone else and I was really upset at the time." Even through each word Dib still didn't tense up or make any bit of movement.

"Yes, being lonely can be a very sad thing, and a very scary one. Which brings me to my next question, Dib." Mack's voice fell just that much more gentle, considering the subject of the next question. "What makes you very scared? Tell me a time that you recently felt very scared or afraid. I want you to be very specific when you answer this question, Dib. Take as much time as you need to remember a very poignant moment that sticks out in your mind."

There was silence for a long time. The only real sound was Dib's small bit of breathing in the room. Finally, his quiet voice once again cut through the silence. "Losing Dwicky. That makes me scared. I was afraid I was going to lose him forever recently. I couldn't say anything about what was happening to me or else he would be taken from me. I didn't want that. But then _They_ came back and things got worse. I couldn't handle it. I was so terrified he would be gone once I told him."

Trec blinked his eyes at that and immediately turned his attention on Dwicky. Even he didn't know what that was all about.

Dwicky weakly glanced back at Trec, sadness crossing his features. He looked to Macks, speaking very quietly. "We've been through a lot, Macks... Stuff I really don't want to explain right about now, or have Dib relive." His eyes fell. "I'm sorry." He looked back up. "Ask about 'They'. That's the problem."

Macks tweaked his lips in thought, but all the same he wasn't going to pry where he wasn't wanted. He went back to Dib. "Who are 'They', Dib? Be as specific and descriptive as you can."

Dib's breath quickened for a split second before it returned to normal and he answered in the same voice he had used before. "They're horrible. Evil things that stay in my head and won't leave me alone. They talk to me and say things I don't want to believe. Voices that say cruel things."

Macks straightened some, leaning back against the backing of the chair. This was going to be a fragile topic; he was going to have to walk very delicately across these brain wrinkles. "Do you know where the voices come from? What I mean is, do you know what they look like? And how many there are you hear?"

Dwicky gave a startled interest. It wasn't a question he'd thought to ask Dib. It made sense, in that abstract way the mind worked.

"They're just twisted and dark. I can never really see them. All I can do is hear them. Three, sometimes four of them. They all say different things. One harsher than the others." Dib's voice still didn't break as he spoke and not once did his breath quicken much like the last time he spoke.

Macks seemed to hesitate, and he pressed his lips together. He leaned forward, leaning his arms on his legs. "These voices... do they have names?" He spoke, more assured. "Knowing the name of something will often give us power over something."

"They don't have names. All they do is taunt me and tell me things. They've always been nameless to me and when I started to really want them out I just didn't care anymore about them. So even if they did have names I just didn't care." Dib's voice had risen just a bit as he spoke, but near the end it returned to normal as he quieted back down.

Macks was quiet for a moment and he scratched his head in thought. Finally he let his hand fall back down onto his lap to lean back on his arms. "Dib, tell me the absolute safest place you like to be. The place you feel most secure, comfortable and happy in."

"At home." The response was calm once more. "It was the place I felt most comfortable and safe at when I visited away from the asylum. Even now, I still feel most safe there."

Dwicky's hand met his face, and he pinched the top of the bridge of his nose, rubbing his brows thoroughly with a quiet groan. He gave a tired sort of sigh; the implications were getting worse. "...He means my place, Macks."

Macks looked at the other, brows raising. But all the same he didn't question it, going back to Dib. At least it was common ground. "Okay. Dib, listen carefully. I want you to take yourself inside the apartment. Everything is as you remember it; the furniture is exactly as you've seen it last. You feel the soft worn down carpet underneath your feet. The air is warm and smells familiar, making you feel safe and secure. You see the couch and you sit down. In your arms is your plush ladybug, making you feel even more secure and relaxed." Macks let out a calming breath of his own. "In front of you, you see the television set and it is turned off. Atop the TV is a camera hooked up to it, and on this camera is your entire life's memories. You look down and see a remote with many different buttons with many different purposes. Some will rewind the camera, going back in your memory and some will forward the camera, going forward in your memories. you pick up the controller and press the power button which turns on the television and plays the camera." Macks took a small breath, his voice falling a little quieter. "Now, Dib, describe to me the first thing you see on the screen."

Dib took a while to answer, much like he had a few other times before. "The woods."

Trec raised his head since he had rested it on his hand some time ago, and blinked his eyes at that answer. "Well that's a rather short response." The words were quiet, afraid he may actually screw up the whole process.

Dwicky only frowned; the woods could mean one of two things.

"Go on Dib." Macks coaxed. "Describe the memory as best you can as you watch it on the TV screen."

"It's the movie we made to try and forget the bad memory that happened. I'm holding the camera while Dwicky gets the stuff out of the car. I'm teasing him because he's acting like a wuss. I only did it to get him to lighten up."

Trec had to hide a laugh behind his hand at Dib's words. After a few seconds he moved his hand away to just barely mumble a sentence out to Dwicky. "He called you a wuss."

Dwicky gave a glare Trec's way, giving him a nudge to knock it off.

Macks had to chuckle too. "That's very nice, Dib. But we need to go back into your memory. Further back. I want you to rewind to a very, very specific point in time. It may take you a moment to find it, so take your time to remember when. I want you to rewind to just before the first time you heard the voices. When you find it, I want you to tell me exactly what happens on the screen; what you're doing, and perhaps what causes that voice to arise."

Dwicky tensed considerably, his eyes locked on Dib; he could feel the warmth drain from his skin in apprehension.

Silence took over the room for much longer than before. What felt like hours were in reality only moments before Dib's voice was finally heard once again. "I'm at the woods again, and Dwicky is still with me. He was supposed to be helping me. He said he believed me, but I found out he lied to me. He has the camera this time and I'm in front of him. Zim's there and so are two others. He's leaving with them. He didn't even care. He just left me. It hurt so much."

The smile that had been on Trec's face before fell away and his attention went back to Dwicky as he stared wide eyed at the other.

Dwicky slowly glanced to Trec, his own eyes widening before they looked down again. He slowly shook his head, the motion painfully robotic; but the action did no good willing Dib's answer away.

Macks almost faltered but he just as easy caught himself, sparing no time to speak again. "What do the voices say, Dib?"

Dib's quiet voice shook a tiny bit as he spoke up to answer the question. "They start out faint, so I can't really hear them. Then they start to become louder as time goes on. They tell me that I shouldn't have trusted him. That I shouldn't trust anyone. That I'm failing. That I'll never be anything and I should just stop trying."

"Uh… hmmm." Macks turned to look at Dwicky. But the man wouldn't meet his gaze, he just kept shaking his head. "Are you sure that isn't your own doubt, Dib? Your own subconscious mind, and worry picking at you. You know what they just said isn't true, right?"

"I don't know. They always sound too real and it always hurts so much. I don't know what to believe when they talk to me. I just keep trying to get them out." Dib's voice continued to shake a bit as he spoke.

"The voices you hear are your own, caused by stress, doubt, self-loathing and hurt; negative emotions that piled on top of each other." Macks took a moment to think. "Dib, I want you to fast forward to the second major time you heard these 'voices' talk to you. Then tell me what you see."

Dib took a bit longer once more to respond to the question much like last time. "I'm in the asylum. Dwicky was back, but I was left in the room alone without my sleeves tied up. They started to talk to me while I sat there waiting for him to come back to the room. They said he wasn't coming back. They said I couldn't trust him. They called him a liar. I had to get them out. I couldn't let them stay in there. I didn't like what they were saying."

"And what were they saying, Dib?" Macks asked quietly.

Dwicky knew where this was going. He buried his face in his hands, but he still strained to listen. It was masochistic, but he needed to hear, he needed to be there for Dib; he promised. He'd never lie like he had again.

Trec placed a hand on Dwicky's shoulder once more when he noticed the man's sudden worry. his attention back on Dib right after.

"'A crazy boy who loves a liar. He only wants one thing. He'll use you then toss you away. Dwicky is laughing at you. He's not coming back. Believing a grown man would care about some stupid crazy child.' That's what they said. Every word. It all hurt so much." Dib's voice seemed to crack a bit before he was finished speaking.

"Now why do you think you would think something like that Dib?" Macks spoke the question honestly. "Why would those thoughts come to your mind then and there in that situation? Why do you think?"

"I was scared. It had been a while and he hadn't come back. I thought he had left me again. He said he cared, but he still wasn't back. I didn't want to believe them, but it was so hard. Each time they said something worse and I couldn't help thinking maybe it was true." Dib's voice cracked a bit more, but as he finished it fell quiet, as it had been through most of the conversation so far.

"Dib, I want you to trust Dwicky's judgment and your own. Whenever you hear something disturbing said by one of those voices I want you to tell yourself that what you hear is just yourself, your doubt, your worry. Do you understand? You will trust your judgment and not believe whatever hurtful thing that other part of you is saying." Macks' voice grew firmer. "Is that understood, Dib?"

"I can't." The words sounded strained as they were said. "I try to and I want to, but I can't. They won't let me. No matter how hard I try. I'm sorry..."

Macks frowned. "Why can't you, Dib? These things you hear are just yourself, and you can control what is apart of you: like moving an arm or a foot." It was a stretch, but it was worth a try.

Dib's voice became shaky once again as soon as he spoke up. "When I try to they just get louder. They don't like when I try and push them away. They become even more vicious and say even worse things. I can't control them. They won't leave me alone. They won't let me be happy."

Macks spoke more quietly. "Why, Dib? Why won't they let you be happy? Why are they there? Why would they be there?"

"Because," Dib's voice had become quiet once more, no longer shaky, as he answered. "they don't like Dwicky. I could hear them muttering things when he first came back. They didn't like him being around. Now, they hate him even more. They say horrible things and tell me why he's really helping me."

Macks let out a long drawn out sigh, and he turned in his chair to face his two friends. He gave a loose shrug. "You're the root, Dwicky. I don't know what you did, but it left a serious trauma that stressed his mind to come up with these things. It's a deep-seeded resentment that's turned into a hate that just seems like it doesn't want to leave." He shook his head, really at a loss. "I don't know what you want me to do."

"...Make him forget... make him forget those disgusting things." Dwicky weakly spoke up, bitterness tinged his voice.

"I can't, Dwicky. You can't just erase things just like that. It isn't that easy. Who knows what those 'voices' are connected to-- negative like emotional, like doubt, sadness. Dib may never feel those again if I did something like that." Macks sighed. "These things take time, many sessions… with a professional." He looked to Trec. "What can I possibly do? I yank teeth by the roots, not memories."

Trec thought over everything that was said and turned his gaze away from both Macks and Dwicky to look back at the still form on the couch. After a long bit of silence, he gave a thoughtful noise before he finally spoke up, his eyes still on Dib. "What if instead of Dib making them go away, you could try and talk them into leaving?" He looked back to Macks. "Or at the very least talk to these so called voices in general. See what the hell really is going on. They're a part of Dib, right? So, you should be able to if that's the case and it's all him."

"I dunno..." Macks rubbed the back of his head. "That's kinda chancy. Those voices are most likely raw emotion, a raw part of Dib several years back that grew in a much more twisted way. If they're as bad as Dib says... it might be harmful to Dib's consciousness on a whole.., bringing them to the surface like that."

Dwicky's gaze slowly looked to Trec, his expression somber yet baited.

Trec glanced at Dwicky for a quick second before he let out a sigh. "Well, it's either take that chance or take the chance of him getting worse and worse with them sitting in the back of his mind. What if he forgets his pills one day?" He looked back to Macks. "You heard him. If they get pushed back for too long they get worse. What then?"

"I say we're out of our league here. The kid needs professional help. But hey, you're the boss here Dwicky." Macks looked to his friend.

Dwicky glanced down. "...He seemed so happy... these last few days." His head lowered and he fiddled with the mood ring on his finger. "But... I... He said he wanted things to be normal. But the sad fact is, it'll never be..." He slowly looked up at Macks with glassy eyes. "...Try it." He sniffed dryly, looking back down.

"Oookay. I'll give it a shot. I've got safeties left in the kid -but we don't know what to expect. So hold onto your socks." Macks moved back to look at Dib. "Alright Dib, I want you to turn off the television and put the controller down. You feel very safe, don't you? In Dwicky's apartment, right? It's secure, the door, the windows, everything is locked tightly and you're very safe in your home. Now... tell me, physically, where are those voices staying at? Where do you keep them hidden?"

The next time Dib spoke up his voice was weak as if afraid to tell such information, but either way he still spoke. "They're always in the back of my mind. Whenever they can't get out I keep them locked up in the very back."

"Alright Dib, I want you to go to sleep in that apartment. Nothing will hurt you there. I want you to go to sleep there until I tell you to wake up." Macks took a deep breath, closing his eyes, letting it out slowly, he opened them once more. "I'm speaking to the back of Dib's mind. I want to talk to the main voice there, the most dominate of the voices there. I am now talking to him. I am only giving you the freedom to talk through Dib, that's all, I am not letting you from the back of Dib's mind. If you can hear me and understand, please speak."

It was quiet for a long time. No sound or words came from Dib's body besides his breathing. It was when it seemed like nothing would happen that his mouth opened, but what came forth didn't sound like his normal voice. The tone was harsh. "You shouldn't be playing around where you don't belong."

Trec had been holding his breath the entire time, but when he heard the words it caused his eyes to widen and one word to be let out. "Freaky..."

Those words from Dib's mouth, that tone, caused Dwicky to snap his gaze to Dib. He opened his mouth but no words of his own came out. His skin prickled and suddenly he felt sick, frozen. A bad feeling crept inside his bones; this felt wrong, so very wrong.

"Who is this I'm talking to?" Macks didn't falter when he spoke again.

"I am the anger and hatred that claws at the mind when the rest are failing to get through." The cruel tone never let up, not once through each word.

"Anger… So, what makes you angry? What is it you hate? What is it that drives you? Why do you exist?" Macks spoke each question carefully.

"The one that wronged us. We hate him. We want him gone!" The last words were nearly shouted and snarled. "He's a liar. A _LIAR!_" The sudden shouts stopped as if a switch had just been turned off and the same harsh tone was back in place. "Care. He doesn't care. He's lying."

"Fucked in the head, won't be happy 'till he's dead." Dib's voice sang in such a different tone, so childish it giggled soon after.

Dwicky's hand rose to his mouth. He suddenly felt physically ill.

Mack's brows rose high. He kept his voice assured. "...What will you do when Dwicky leaves? Will you leave Dib then?"

"Who's to say what will happen..." The words had a cruel teasing edge to them. "Maybe. Maybe not. We look out for him in our own special way. If we feel the need to stay then we'll stay."

"You are Dib. All of 'you' are Dib. So there really only is one. One consciousness with several sides." Macks went on.

"Zim is gunna kill you, kill you, put you in a human zoo." that same childish voice sang on once again.

That last part had Trec raising a brow and looking to Dwicky for a moment. Just as quickly he turned his eyes back on Dib.

There was silence for a while before the voice started to speak again. "We are much different from Dib. We know the consequences of just sitting aside and doing nothing. He's a failure. A nothing. He's letting Earth down. He's letting all of you down. We're so very different." A mocking laughter came from Dib's lips. "Such a stupid child."

"Little boy likes to be touched by old men in naughty, naughty places. Wouldn't you like to know where." Dib giggled in that childish voice, so immaturely. "He especially likes it when he sucks on his ear. Sucking, sucking, coming, coming. Harder, harder from behind!"

"No longer such a good boy anymore. He took that too. He took the last of anything innocent inside. Raping it away." Another voice took over, so quick to speak.

"Dibs no longer a virgin. Dibs no longer a virgin. Dibs no longer a virgin." The childish voice sang song in an on obnoxiously teasing tone.

Macks didn't say anything after, he just turned his wide eyed expression back to his friends.

Trec was sure his jaw had fallen to the floor. Sure, he knew some things, but hearing them spoken in such a vulgar way was just a little unreal. He realized that Macks had turned his eyes on them and quickly tried to get his thoughts in order. His eyes turned towards Dwicky, knowing the other couldn't have been taking any of it well at all.

Dwicky looked like he was one step away from his grave. He'd always wondered what Dib heard, and here it was, just a taste, and even he could barely handle the things said. Three years, how Dib could handle it for those few days he'd been without his medication, it amazed him.

Macks gestured back to Dib who continuously spoke sick degrading words. "You want me to talk that out of him, Trec." He gave the man a look between angry and overwhelmed.

Trec looked back at Macks and flinched at the look on the other's face. All he could do was give a quick shrug, not even sure himself how to answer such a thing. He wasn't expecting anything so intense.

Dwicky finally raised his head, something so somber etched into his face. "Let me talk to them, Macks..."

Macks was taken aback. "...I don't think that's particularly smart, considering how much they- well... you can hear for yourself."

"Move the hell out of the way, Macks."

Dwicky stood up, and that seemed enough to be motivated. He turned back to Dib and spoke loud enough to be heard over Dib's mocking voices. "You will be able to hear Dwicky's voice, hear it and listen to it like you hear and listen to my own. Do you understand? You will---" but Dwicky shoved him off the chair before he could finish.

"Get out of the room." Dwicky muttered.

"Dwicky, that's not a--" Macks started.

"I said get the hell out of the room!" Dwicky shouted back, glaring imperviously hard at either of his friends.

Trec didn't need to be told twice. He immediately stood from his seat and walked over to Macks, taking the other by the arm to lead him out the room. "Come on. It's best that we just go." He glanced back at Dwicky for only a quick second before he turned away, walking with Macks out the room, shutting the door behind them.

As soon as did Dwicky turned to Dib, moving to sit down in the chair where Macks had. He stayed quiet, staring at Dib's limp form, his lips were still moving but Dwicky couldn't hear anymore, or perhaps Dib wasn't talking at all. Dwicky reached out to take Dib's small boney shoulders, lifting him up, then relenting a hand to support his head to sit Dib up so very carefully on the couch, so that they were face to face. When he was sure Dib was safely propped up, he let his hand slip to the boy's cheek, ever so softly caressing a pale cheek with affections that caused his chest to tighten so painfully. He let the hand raise up to brush back the dark hair from the boy's forehead; Db's hair was already becoming overgrown again, and the childishly shaggy mess caused a sad smile to cross his lips, his eyes aching and hot. But as Dwicky let his hands fall from Dib, his smile did as well. He swallowed a thick pain in his throat before everything about him grew stoic and cold. Finally he spoke up, his tone so low and biting. "...You know who I am. I don't need to tell you; you've already made up your opinions. I'm not here to talk to you to change them. But I want you to know, whatever part of Dib you are; I love him, every part of him, and that'll never _ever_ change." His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed the ache that wanted to crack his voice.

There was silence for a few moments before the same voice Macks had been talking to lashed out once again, but in an even harsher tone than before. "LIAR! You don't want to help! You only want to hurt!" There was a small noise as Dib began to click his tongue before he spoke again. "Tick-Tock. Tick-Tock. How much time is left before everything is burned away? Before everything becomes real? The liar is ignoring the truth so he can play with his little toy."

Dwicky straightened, but otherwise he didn't react to the words spoken. "But I'm a fair man, and I know my limits. Sometimes you have to lose to win. And to make up for all this hurt, I'm willing to sacrifice everything to rectify what I've done." Dwicky closed his eyes a brief moment. "You hate me, that's fine. I'm not talking to you to change your mind. What I have is a proposition. And it's very simple that even a split personality such as yourselves can understand." Dwicky leaned forward, resting his weight on the back of the couch to speak quieter words near Dib's form. "...I'll leave Dib if you leave Dib."

The quiet didn't last half as long as it did before and the harsh tone seemed to have let up some as soon as the voice was heard again. "We might just agree to that..."

A hand went to Dib's chin, tilting it as if the boy's eyes were open, to raise his gaze. "But the moment he starts to hear things again.. I'll be there so quickly, all over him, so deep... There'll be no getting rid of me ever again. I'll seep into every pour, so deep under his skin, that no amount of scrubbing will ever make you clean." His thumb traced the curve of the boy's jaw.

A low sound came from the back of Dib's throat, almost like a growl. It was all that was heard after Dwicky's words. Nothing spoken from the voice. A silent acceptance.

"Then it's decided. When Dib wakes up from this, you'll be gone..." Dwicky swallowed, pressing his lips together before speaking "I'll be gone." He went back to stroking Dib's cheek. "Now shutup and go back to the back Dib's mind." Dwicky went lax, almost crumpling atop the boy. He rested his head heavily on Dib's shoulder. "…I'm sorry, Dib. I'm so sorry." His shoulders shook and he couldn't keep the sob in. "I'm sorry, I screwed up. I screwed up so badly." His voice cracked, and the tears couldn't be stopped.

Instead of harsh words, there was silence from Dib once again. All that came from him was his calm breaths much like before Macks had brought out the voices.

Dwicky sniffed wetly, sinking from the chair down onto knees so he could rest his cheek against Dib's chest. Weakly, he clung to the boy's middle. "Dib... I want you to go back to that happy memory Macks told you about. The day we went out, and we didn't hide, and you were really happy. Go back to it, and remember it, re-live it, and be happy." his voice cracked horribly and he buried his face against Dib's chest, clinging tighter, though it did little to muffle his heavy sobs.

Through each sob and bit of clinging Dwicky did, Dib continued to keep absolutely still. Only for a quick second did barely a smile pull at his lips, but it fell just as quickly as he became completely relaxed once again.

---

"There's something you're not telling me, Trec." The aforementioned man was nudged rather hard. "What the hell is going on with Dwicky and that kid? Something is really off, and you're playing silent. You told me hypnotize this poor kid and I did that. You told me to not question what comes out of his mouth and I did that too. But now Dwicky is acting dark and this Dib kid has 'psychotic killer' written all over him." Macks grasped either of Trec's shoulders to thud the man rather hard against the wall so he wouldn't leave and faced him. "I put up with enough of your nonchalant bullshit, Trec. Go out on a limb and actually give a damn about me sometime." He tightened his hold on the other's shoulders.

The rough treatment had completely surprised Trec and caused him to become rather dazed for a few moments. At Macks' last words, Trec gazed at the other for a while as he tried to clear his head of everything that had happened in the study as well as being slammed against the wall. "It's not that easy. Some things just can't be talked about." Instead of trying to get away, he turned his head away so he wouldn't have to look at the other.

"That's crap coming from a crap counselor like you." Macks could only glare harder at Trec since the other refused to look at him. "And it must be crap because it was talked about to you." He exhaled, but it did little to calm him. "You dragged me into this Trec; now what the hell did you drag me into?" he couldn't help his voice raising.

Trec shot a dirty look Macks' way, but just as quickly it fell as he dropped his gaze between them on the floor. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but words wouldn't come out and he closed it again. It took him longer to think over his words once more before he was actually really ready to talk. "Dwicky came to my place a couple of days ago, pretty much on the verge of a breakdown. I didn't think I would ever get him to talk even though he was a nervous wreck." Trec took a deep breath before he went on as if it were his own secret being shared. "It took a while, but when he finally broke down he told me the one main thing he needed to tell me." Trec gestured towards the closed door with his head without looking up. "He's in a relationship with Dib. A very serious, real, relationship."

Macks' eyes widened and his hands loosened their hold until they fell away from Trec's shoulders, no energy to keep them there. He looked away, but some how he felt he should have guessed with how the two interacted, there was something there he couldn't put his thumb on; and what the voices had said should have solidified it for him. He didn't want to believe it, but here was the proof. He fell forward until his forehead thudded heavily against the wall. There he hit it several times, but still the information wouldn't sit right with him.

Trec let out a heavy sigh and looked to the side at Macks. Since he was finally free it allowed him to move away from the wall to stand beside the other, placing his hands on Macks' shoulders and pulling the other away from the wall. "You're gonna give yourself a headache." Even when Macks' head was no longer near the wall, Trec still kept his hands on the other's arms. "This is why I didn't want you to question anything. I was hoping you'd just leave it alone. It was one of the reasons Dwicky was hesitant to do this whole thing."

"Dwicky was s'pose to be the level headed one. What the hell does he think he's doing with-- with a kid. That's just wrong." Mack's voice petered, he knew he was stating something obvious; it was on all of their minds, but most of all Dwicky's. "…Makes sense now why he looks like he's crawled outta Hell." He hung his head, but his mind just didn't want to wrap around it. "It's sick ya know. This whole thing. --That kid is very, very sick. He doesn't need such a complicated thing like a 'serious relationship' with Dwicky's age. What, did all the good looking guys and girls his age just not do it for him? He had to pick the most messed up and youngest thing he could find."

Trec dropped his hands back down to his own sides as his eyes narrowed. "We've known Dwicky for a long time. I don't know how you could say such a thing. You should know he's not like that." He shook his head and moved back to the wall, leaning against it. "He told me that he really loves that kid. You should have heard him, Macks. He said he wasn't doing it just to sleep with him, or to hurt him. He really cares about that kid." He moved his eyes back to Macks. "And you heard Dib while he was about of it. He's happiest with Dwicky and he seemed fine at the mall yesterday."

"I still think it's wrong." Macks sighed heavily, swaying over to lean against the wall beside Trec. "But hey, I'm no man of morals either. So... I guess I can't talk." He leaned even more heavily against the wall, thudded his head back to rest against it too. "This... is messed."

"Very messed." Trec turned around only slightly so he would be able to wrap his arms around Macks' waist. "Just don't be too hard on him. He's been really stressed lately, and now piling this whole hypnotizing business on top of all of that. I don't think he needs to worry even more. Who knows what could happen after all of this is over with."

Macks opened his mouth, and it seemed as if he'd reject Trec's advance, but in the end he gave in. His mind was already in a spin, and the comfort, as mixed as it was, was appreciated. He placed a hand on Trec's shoulder so he could rest his forehead on it. "...What do you think they're talking about in there? ...That we supposedly can't hear."

Trec looked towards the door and after a few seconds he shook his head. "Who knows. Before we left nothing good was happening in there. We just have to hope he's having a better chance of getting through to those things than you were." Trec turned his head back around to face the other and let it rest on the Macks' own. "I can't believe that's what was in Dib's head."

There was a long silence between them.

"Me eith-" Macks was interrupted by the sound of the door opening behind them. He raised his head to watch Dwicky slowly shuffle out. The man looked far worse than they left him. His eyes were red rimmed and puffy around, and seemed to have sunk deeper as if he hadn't slept for days on end, even though it had only been a few minutes since they'd seen him.

Dwicky walked pasted, his gait slow, weak, the weight of his body barely held up by his legs. "... Trec, can you drive me home." he managed to mutter in a voice hoarse with abuse.

Trec narrowed his eyes when he saw how worn down Dwicky looked, but there was also some curiosity behind his eyes. He didn't question any of it, though. Not yet. "Uh, sure." He looked around for a moment as he let go of Macks to walk towards Dwicky. "Is Dib still out of it? If so, Macks can wake him up and we can get going if you really want to."

Dwicky dug around in his pocket and handed Trec the keys to his car. "He's still... still asleep, yea." He swallowed thickly, his eyes heavily on the floor. "Just… let him sleep a little longer. He barely gets enough good restful sleep as is." He gave a sarcastic laugh that cracked. "Who am I kidding, he's never been this relaxed… ever since I've known him." He swallowed again, trying to keep himself together in front of Trec. "Just give him a ride home after he wakes up... c'n you do that for me, Trec?" Dwicky raised his glassy eyes to glance at his friend.

Trec fiddled with the keys he had been given as he looked at Dwicky. He was about to agree, but as he kept his eyes on his friend he couldn't help but question what was going on a little bit. "Are you sure? Don't you think he'd much rather go home with you?" He paused for a second and his hands stilled. "Dwicky, what's wrong?"

Dwicky didn't stop walking towards the door, soullessly. "...I made a deal with the devil."


	40. Sessions 40

**Monsters and Ladybugs**  
**By Kitteh and NeoFox**  
**Rating:** R  
**Warnings:** Violence and intense smooching  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Heartless7

Chapter 40

"Skeets." The one simple name was spoken next to Dib.

In an instant Dib's eyes opened and fell on the ceiling above him. He couldn't help blinking a few times to clear the fog from his mind before he slowly sat up. One of his hands moved up to rub an eye under his glasses while he turned his head to look around the room. His eyes landed on Macks first, then on Trec who was leaning against the door. When he realized who was missing, that's when he spoke up. "What happened? Did you do it?" He continued to look around the room for a few more seconds before he looked back at Macks. "Where's Mister Dwicky?"

Macks glanced back at Trec, unsure of what exactly to say to the boy. He looked back to Dib, pensive. "We did. Uh... Trec drove him home. But... um, he left you this." Macks handed Dib a rather rumpled piece of folded paper. He paused and tried to smile for Dib's sake. "So, uh, how are you feeling?"

A small frown came over Trec's face and instead of keeping his eyes on Dib, he looked down to the floor at his feet.

"Drove him home?" Dib repeated the words quietly as he quickly turned his eyes towards the note. The hand he had used to rub his eye fell down to take the note handed to him. He didn't even answer Macks' last question. He was too focused on reading what was on the paper as he opened it up.

_'Dib'_ it started out. Those three letters seemed to be traced over, and over, as if Dwicky couldn't get past the name. Just below it the first line was heavily scribbled out. The rest of the words after were written in shaky, messy cursive, smeared and smudged by little damp blips on the paper.  
_'They're gone. You're free. You don't need medication now. And you don't need me anymore.'_  
There was a dot on the paper, shakily going onto the next words with apprehension, as if it hurt to go on. _'I talked to them. It's my fault they're there.'_ The words grew a little bolder. _'So if I gave them, I can also take them away.'_  
The next line down grew shaky again. _'I'm sorry some part of you hates me. So I had to remove what you hated to fix everything.  
I owe you so much more..'_ the lines petered.  
_'But I love you enough to let you go  
-Dwicky'_

The paper shook in Dib's hands and soon it became a blurred mess. The words ran together and it was then that Dib realized tears had started to cloud his vision. He didn't seem to care and only held the paper tighter, almost in danger of tearing the edges. He tried to speak, but no words wanted to come out. All he could do was open and close his mouth. Barely a noise coming out which sounded more pained than anything. "Why?" The one word finally left him, so quiet it was almost hard to hear. "Why did he..." He shook his head weakly. "Why?" It was happening all over again.

Trec had lifted his head back up at some point while Dib read over the note. As he watched Dib's reaction to the words he couldn't help but feel bad for the boy. It was when Dib finally spoke in such a broken voice, that Trec took one small step forward away from the door, keeping his voice quiet as he spoke up. "He found it best that he left you a note, Dib. If you argued against it then Dwicky would have easily given in and he wanted this for you. For you to get better. It was the only way." Trec waited a few moments and frowned when there was no response. Not even a movement from Dib.

"Dwicky was the root of your trauma, Dib. When Dwicky left, that's when the voices came. There's some deep seeded resentment you have for him that built and built over years that causes those horrific thoughts..." Macks quietly explained.

Trec walked over to Dib, hesitating a moment before he held something out for him. "...He wanted me to give you this." He dropped a mood ring onto Dib's hand.

A choked sound left Dib as he stared down at the ring for so long. His eyes widened bit by bit and it finally let the tears fall, but he didn't seem to care. His hand slowly closed around the ring and tightened while his other hand kept hold of the note. He brought both to his chest and held them close as he stared straight ahead, his eyes still wide. "He's gone. He left me again." The words were almost questions. so disbelieving that any of it was real.

Macks looked at Trec, his brows furrowing as a sad expression crossed his face. He looked away from both and murmured "...Maybe it's for the better." He glanced at Dib. "He did it for you... So you could start over, better."

"This was the only way for things to be normal for you, Dib. Dwicky knew that. He just wanted you to be happy and not have to deal with any of it anymore." Trec continued to speak carefully as he leaned down near the couch.

Dib clutched the ring even tighter and continued to stare ahead. He didn't even blink when either man spoke, too off in a daze to really care. It was after a while when he dropped his head to look down at his closed hands that he finally spoke up in the same broken voice. "I was happy with him."

"You were sick." Macks spoke more firmly. He glanced away. "..It was sick. Things can get better now. You can live your life normally now… Like a normal teenage kid." Though his brows furrowed more angrily but his gaze fell sadly to the floor.

Trec turned his attention on Macks and narrowed his eyes. He was about to open his mouth to say something, but thought better on it, shutting it just as quickly. A huge argument was not going to help the situation.

Dib lifted his head and his eyes landed on Macks. The man knew and the words that were said upset Dib even worse. "It wasn't sick." It was a weak statement, but he didn't feel very strong at the moment. "Things were already getting better. He let me know I was normal. He always made me feel like I was normal." His voice started to rise. He lifted a hand to wipe at his eyes as he shook his head. "You don't understand anything. It wasn't sick at all. I loved him and now he's gone again!" He broke down after those words, not able to keep up the sudden strength. His body shaking as he wept.

Trec had watched Dib through his entire outburst and kept sad eyes on the boy. After all was said and done all he could do was watch. "Dib..."

Macks didn't look at Dib, all he could do was watch the floor and hear Dib's painful sobs. There was no winning with this. And although he disapproved of the relationship, he felt horrible for both; just knowing Dwicky was doing the same thing as Dib, though his break down was done all alone. He shut his eyes, but it did little good to shut anything out.

Trec continued to keep his eyes on Dib's shaking form for a while longer before he made a move. He leaned over a bit more and placed his hands on Dib's shoulders, keeping them there as he started to speak. "Dib, try to calm down. This is something that's for the best. It was a way to get rid of everything you heard in your head. No more voices. You don't have to worry anymore. Try to understand that."

Dib had started to hiccup as he continued to cry. When Trec came near and touched him, he flinched a bit, but made no move to pull away. Instead, he kept his eyes down, letting his tears fall on his hands which had fallen to his lap. "If I have to lose Dwicky then I'd rather keep what's in my head."

"Well isn't that a double standard." Macks spoke up sharply. He looked back at Dib, shaking his head. "As far as I can tell this guy is doing back flips for you. He got you out of a hopeless situation in an asylum, got you released, and now he just ridded you with what most people have to struggle against their whole lives. He was torn up that you were going to be medicated your whole life. He gave up everything just so you could _think_ clearly. That's a fucking miracle, Dib." He glared at the kid. "Maybe you should be thanking him, Dib, instead of getting yourself sick with self pity." He knew it was hard, perhaps even cruel, but if Dwicky wasn't there to be realistic then he was. "You should have seen him. He was the walking dead on two feet, just for you. So suck it up."

The hard words caused Dib to blink wide eyes at Macks for so long that he almost lost his breath. When he realized he was running out of air, he made a startled noise and turned his eyes on Trec while taking in much needed air. He shrugged off Trec's hands and scooted back away from the other as if he would suddenly be bitten, letting his eyes fall back down to his closed hands as the tears continued to fall.

Trec dropped his hands as if they had been burned and flinched. The look on Dib's face made it seem as if the boy had just been kicked multiple times. "Damnit..."

"Sorry." Macks muttered. "…But it needed to be said." He still wouldn't look at anyone.

Trec closed his fists tightly and finally, turned around to face Macks with narrowed eyes. Even if the other wouldn't look at him, he still spoke up anyway. "You're just upset about their relationship! You can't stand it! Now is not the time to be tough, Macks! The kid is just as heartbroken as Dwicky more than likely is. You can't sit here and just expect him to be fine with what's going on. No matter the reasoning behind it. It's still just as hard for him!" He let out a harsh sigh after he was finished.

"Do you know what it's like to be lied to?" Dib's voice cut through the sudden silence after Trec's outburst. So small and scared. "To have so much hope for something and then have it all crash down and break into so many pieces?" His voice cracked, but still he kept on. "I felt like that for so long. I didn't think that feeling would ever go away. When Dwicky came back I was cruel to him. I called him things that I never want to call him again. He told me how sorry he was. He told me that he would never lie again. That he would take care of me." He brought his knees up to his chest, muffling his voice in them. "I believed him. I tried to ignore everything and just believe him. I thought everything would be better. We were supposed to be a family." He choked on a sob and buried his face further. "I always tried to thank him. I was always glad to have him there with me. Everything he did for me meant so much."

"... I know what it's like to be lied to. To give and give and give- but what you get isn't what you want. I know what it's like to wait, and hope, that someday someone will change and return everything. So, you may think I'm being a jerk, acting tough, but there's a time to move on." Macks let out a shaky breath and looked at Dib's feet. "...Just take what you need and move on. Waiting only hurts more." Macks dragged a hand through his hair. "Dwicky did what he could for you. He sacrificed the most precious thing he had to make you better." his voice petered, almost bitterly. "I think I would be damn touched if someone gave something like that for me." He glanced a second Trec's way before letting his gaze fall to Dib's feet again.

Trec kept his eyes on Macks after those words and the quick glance, only to look away with a sad expression on his own face, his eyes dropping to the floor.

Dib stayed silent after the words were said. All that came from him were choked sobs that were muffled against his knees. Finally, he lifted his head and stared ahead once more as he tried his best to speak. "It still hurts. I loved him. I _still_ love him. I love him so much. I thought everything would be okay and four years wouldn't seem so long anymore." He rested his head back down so he could wipe his eyes. only succeeding in making his glasses crooked. "It hurts to have to let go again."

"... I know it does… But like we said, it's for the better, Dib." Macks licked his dry lips, silent as he stared at the computer across the room. There wasn't anything more said, and there wasn't much to be heard but Dib's sobs once more. Finally Macks looked at Trec. "Marda's moving in with me." The words came out of nowhere, and it was the most inappropriate of times, but perhaps it was fitting like that; pushing everything off his chest.

The sudden confession startled Trec and he turned wide eyes on Macks as if he hadn't heard the other clearly. "You're kidding, right?"

"No, Trec," Macks spoke in a mock normal tone "She's my girlfriend, why would I be." He glanced away. "She and I have been talking it over for months now. We've been going out for… over two years now. It only seems right." He looked back at Trec, the sarcasm gone.

Trec tensed up as Macks spoke each word. After there was silence again he tried to talk, but words just wouldn't come. It took a few moments and a hard swallow before he could finally get anything out. "What about us?"

Dib's sobs turned into quick hiccups as he slowly lifted his head to look at the two, his eyes heavy and just barely opened. His hands still clutched the two objects he held tightly even as his attention turned to the other two in the room.

The surprise on Macks' face turned more serious with a subtle lower of brows. "What about us?" he re-iterated the question right back. "As far as I can tell there never has been an 'us'." He tilted his head one way. "There's been a you and Dwicky." He tilted his head the other way. "But not a you and I." He nonchalantly shrugged. "...Of course this means you'll have to take all your stuff out of my room." he continued quietly. "...I'm tired of hiding your things from Marda. Lying to her, telling her they're mine."

Trec shook his head a few times before he just couldn't take it and he started to pace back and forth. "Why the hell would you bring up me and Dwicky? That was a long time ago and it didn't even work out." He stopped for a moment a few feet away from Macks. "This... This is different."

Dib let out a small noise at the things Trec said and quickly buried his face away once again to try and hide from everything.

"You cheated on Dwicky with _me_!" Macks couldn't help but glance at Dib, realizing who he mentioned. But the boy was shutting himself away. He looked back to Trec. "Where's the difference, Trec? What's one lay compared to another with you?" He looked down, disappointment draining his poise as he looked sadly at the floor. "... At least I know Marda will wake up beside me… and not someone else's bed." He flinched some at his own words. "..I should give her the same. She deserves the same."

Trec clenched his hands tightly at his sides. Dwicky's words came back to him from that small moment in the mall, but he quickly tried to shake the memory off. "That's what you think?" His own tone was becoming harsh. "Despite how many years we've known each other, that's all you think?" He wasn't only talking about their friendship, but whether or not Macks realized that didn't really matter to him. "That I'm always just after some lay?" His eyes narrowed and he seemed to hesitate for a long while before he was finally able to speak. "It was never that way with you. Ever."

"What about everyone inbetween, Trec? All the boys and girls you laid inbetween-- you think those don't matter? It doesn't _mean_ anything if you keep sharing it. And I'm tired of waiting for you Trec… I'm tired of waiting for you to grow up. I'm tired of being a doormat... I'm tired of giving in." Macks stood up from his chair, walking from it but not facing Trec. "It was fun while it lasted, but I can't live like that. Not anymore." He shook his head slowly. "Not when Marda is talking about things like...-like marriage and kids." He gripped the back of the chair tightly.

Trec shut his eyes tightly, hoping to bury the words he had just heard far back. When he opened them again everything was just the same and he was looking at Macks' back as he tried to figure out even one word to say to the other. Nothing would come out. He was drawing a blank and in the end all he could do was look back down and blame himself for everything, knowing it really was all his fault. "I'll pick up my things later this week..."

A small sound left Macks, but he covered it up with a sharp scoff. He ripped his hand free of the tight hold he had on the chair. He tried to collect himself again, taking in a breath to steady him. Finally he spoke up again. "You really are useless. You aren't doing anything now-" he sharply turned to face Trec, but he couldn't look at his face "so go get your damn stuff now!" He pointed hard at the door out.

Trec narrowed his eyes for a moment, but just as quickly the anger left his face. He looked up at Macks then looked back towards Dib, giving a small sigh when he saw that the boy was still huddled up. His eyes fell away from the shaking form and without a word he walked out of the study towards the door. He only gave one last look at Macks before he shut the door behind himself.

The only noise left in the room were Dib's muffled cries as he continued to keep his face buried, the entire argument having been heard even though he tried his best to ignore it.

Macks looked at Dib, and suddenly he felt worse. He walked over to sit himself beside the boy on the couch. He picked up the discarded plush, looking it over in his hands. He pet the fuzzy back of the ladybug, speaking up, his voice so much more quiet than it had been. "...I'm sorry you had to hear that, Dib ...And, despite what it looks like, I'm sorry for everything that's happened with Dwicky. Today just sucks all over." He nudged the side of Dib's head with the plush's nose. "Here, Skeets wants you to hug him."

Dib raised his head much like before so only his eyes could be seen. Smudges had formed on his lenses because of his tears and could clearly be seen, but he either didn't notice or just didn't care. The only move he made was to lift his arms up and take the plush from Macks and immediately cling tight to it, the entire time still not letting go of the note or the ring.

Macks gave the briefest of smiles for Dib before he leaned his arms on his legs. "...All he has to do is ask..." he murmured to himself "Just give in... But it's obvious he doesn't care enough. Or he would have fought harder." He shook his head, giving up on himself, on Trec. He looked back at the poor boy. "…You're welcome to stay here as long as you need to, Dib. Or, if you want to go home, or to a friends where you might be more comfortable. I… could even call Fwenn, since you seemed to like her so much. Or you could go with Trec. I'm sure he wouldn't mind... considering."

Dib turned his eyes on Macks and kept them on the other for a few moments. There was obvious confusion on his face, especially considering the words that had come from Macks much earlier. The questions ran through his mind, though and he seemed to consider them. In the end all he could do was shake his head and stare ahead once more as he clung even tighter to Skeets. Being around Dwicky's friends without Dwicky just felt so strange. He couldn't do it. "I just want to go home. To my home." A frown came to his face and he rested his head back on his knees.

Macks smiled a little at Dib, trying to lighten the mood what little he could. "I know you don't like me much, but... if you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. Alright?"

Dib didn't respond for a long while. Instead the only sound that came from him were small noises as he tried his best to calm himself, failing horribly at it. Finally, his eyes dropped to the ring that was still on his own finger and as he continued to keep his attention on it, he spoke up. "Please don't tell anyone. You think it's sick. You think I would be better away from him. You may think all of that, but please don't tell anyone." His voice started cracking again. No longer able to hold anything in for what short amount of time he had. "He may be gone, but I still don't want anything to happen to him."

Macks was taken aback but quickly he shook his head. "N-no, of course not. I won't say anything. I'm the master at that, you'll easily find." He drew an 'X' over his heart. "Cross my heart and hope to die. What happened between you and Dwicky is your own business and no one else's. And I would never rat out Dwicky. That would be hypocritical since he's got a lot of dirt on me." Macks made a small sound in his throat. "...He could just as easily have told Marda about Trec and me." he continued quietly. "We're all really messed up. But that Dwicky, as screwed up as it seems, he's a good guy." He looked back at Dib. "Not a lot of people would do what he did, Dib. It seems horrible, like the world is going to end, but in the long run you'll see it was the best thing he could do for you." He gave a small sad chuckle. "Not a lot of counselors can say they've cured insanity. That's a shrink's dirty work."

Dib lifted a hand up away from Skeets to rub under his eyes once again. After he was finished he dropped it back down and opened it up revealing the note which was even more crumpled up than before. He slowly opened the piece of paper to look over each smeared word and written letter that still hurt to read. "I don't know what to do now. They're gone and I'm supposed to be cured completely, but now what?" His mind went over everything talked about with Dwicky. How they would celebrate at his house with friends. To when he would take him to the prom, everything that he had looked forward to. Even to the time he would finally be able to leave the whole city behind with just Dwicky. "How am I supposed to be happy?"

Macks looked forward at that, thinking it over himself. He leaned his elbows on his legs, resting his chin on hands. He slowly shook his head, unsure of what to do with himself now either. A life without Trec looked as equally bleak as Dib's life without Dwicky. It had him giving a gentle sigh. "...One day at a time I guess. Just gotta live life one day at a time."

Dib looked over at Macks with sad eyes still full of tears, but just as quickly he looked ahead once again, staying silent. No longer speaking.

After a little longer the door finally opened again and Trec stuck his head in. He was ready to walk all the way in and snap Dib out of it himself, but seeing that the boy was no longer a huddled shaking mess caused him to stop for a second. He only glanced at Macks for a moment before he spoke up. "I got all my stuff. It's out in my car ready to go." He looked back at Dib and spoke more carefully instead of in such a curt tone. "Dib, I have to take you home. You want to go now?"

Dib didn't answer. All he did was stand up from the couch and make his way over to Trec on weak legs. It was amazing he didn't topple over.

Macks watched Dib before he looked over to Trec. Something hurtful fell across his expression, anything hopeful about it was crossed out by disappointment and nonchalance. He stood up as well. "I'll see you two out."

Trec shook his head as he placed a hand on Dib's shoulder once the boy was near him. "It's fine. I know my own way out." He turned his eyes back on Macks and for a few seconds it seemed as if he would speak again, but just as quickly he shook his head, turning his attention back on Dib. "Come on Dib, let's go." With those final words he led Dib out of the study to leave the house for good.

Macks fell back down to sit slumped on the couch. He listened to their steps until he heard the front door open, causing him to spring to his feet, hurrying down the halls. He skidded to a stop, nearly falling over when he slipped on a floor rug. "Trec, wait." Unfortunately he didn't think that far ahead and his mind blanked out.

Trec stopped on the walkway that led to the driveway, but didn't face the front door. He kept still for a few moments before he leaned down to speak to Dib. "Go ahead to the car and wait for me, okay?" He got a nod in response and waited until Dib had walked far enough away before he finally turned to face Macks. "What?" He tried to keep his tone even, but it was hard, even with just that one word.

Macks faltered. He couldn't figure what to say, and it had him gripping the door frame tightly. He needed to say something, anything. "D-... -did it mean _anything_?"

Trec narrowed his eyes some and quickly looked down at the walkway. It was obvious he was hesitant to answer, but he forced the words out anyway. "It did. It meant a lot. More than I'm really willing to admit." Trec shrugged, trying to act as if none of it bothered him and he hadn't actually spoken the words at all. "Doesn't matter, though."

Those words seemed to drain Macks and his gaze fell with his hands. "...Guess not."

Trec looked over at Macks for one last second and frowned before he spoke up again. "I should get going. I'll see you later." Those words sounded so doubtful, but he wanted to say them anyway.

Macks nodded, though he didn't look back up. "Make sure Dib's okay when he gets home.. Maybe check on Dwicky if you can."

Trec gave a small sound, the only real thing which made it clear that he had heard. With that he turned and walked the rest of the way down the walk to his car. He got inside and started it up, taking no time backing up and driving off. He didn't even give the house a second glance as he went down the street.


	41. Sessions 41

**Monsters and Ladybugs**

  


**By Kitteh and NeoFox**

  
**Rating:** R  
**Warnings:** Violence and intense smooching  
**Disclaimer:** Smeets will eat our souls if we dare claim Invader Zim. So yeah, Jhonen can keep his smeets of DOOM!  
**Summary:** DADR. Three years later Dwicky comes back to fix what he messed up. But the little boy he left behind is no longer the same energetic soul from before and now may just be too broken to reach.  
**Beta:** Less

Chapter 41

"I love you." Dwicky murmured against damp skin, nuzzling the pale neck with a lazy motion. He petered sweet little kisses there, letting his fingers gently smooth across the curve of the other's back, in silent affectionate apology for the red tracks he'd left there just minutes ago.  
The bed was so small, a single, but it was all they could afford along with the new little house and meager furniture inside it. It didn't matter much, Dib's frame was still so frail even after several years. It was cozy, and it was theirs, that's all that mattered. Dib was his. Finally, _his_. And the system, no, the world couldn't take that away from him.

Dwicky tugged Dib closer, pressing so impossibly close, needing to feel the hot warmth of body against his. It was almost desperate, though he couldn't be sure why. He just continued to murmur those three words with each new kiss and touch.

Arms wrapped around Dwicky's waist as pleased noises left the body near him. Dib squirmed as one touch became ticklish and it was then that he turned his head to capture up the other's lips for a slow kiss. As his tongue moved across Dwicky's own, he raised a hand to bury it in the man's hair, running it through each strand before he finally pulled back. A tiny grin on his face. "I love you too. Always will." He reached his hand around in front of them both and it was on one finger that a familiar ring could be seen even after so long. With only a few fingers he pushed back the hair from Dwicky's forehead and pressed a kiss to the skin.

Dwicky made a noise deep in his throat, Dib's actions causing an endearing ache deep in his chest. He felt humbled by it and all he could do was run the bridge of his nose underneath Dib's chin. "I don't want to leave." he spoke very quietly, as if speaking too loud would shatter that moment in time. "Just stay in bed all day. Like this. With you." He nuzzled the underside of Dib's jaw, smoothing a hand up and down the other's chest, feeling the still quick beat of heart warm under his palm. "Hearing you say that over and over again."

There was a faint noise so very far in the background. It caused Dib to tighten his hold for a moment, but otherwise it was ignored. "I love you. I love you. I love you." The words were spoken over and over against Dwicky's skin as the noise started to get louder. A loud slam as things started to grow dim and dark. Dib cuddled closer to Dwicky and shut his eyes. "I wish we could stay like this." The banging became overpowering and much too loud to ignore anymore.

Dwicky's eyes snapped, and he was overwhelmed by disorientation as his surroundings weren't what they had been seconds ago. He was back in his dingy apartment room, buried beneath blankets in his bed, alone. He blinked a few times, staring at the space beside him on the sheets. He reached a hand out to run a hand over it. It wasn't warm, no one had been there, ever been there. Dwicky choked out a destroyed noise, clasping at the sheet before he slammed his fist against the mattress over and over again. "Damnit!"

But there that sound came again, a hard knock on his door that had woken him up. Dwicky dreaded company, and dreaded even more who it could be. A disgusting taste sour taste coated his mouth; cigarettes and hard liquor, leaving him with a headache that only made the next knock even louder. Dwicky untangled himself from his blankets, dragging himself to the door. He unlocked it and opened it, glancing to who it was, he then left the door to trudge into the kitchen to find something for his headache.

Trec dropped his hand back to his side and watched as Dwicky walked away. He took the open door as a silent invitation to walk in and did just that, closing it behind himself. He kept silent, not speaking a word, not really feeling up to it. He knew he needed to check on Dwicky though, and just that one glance he got at his friend told him that the other wasn't doing that great at all. With slow steps he followed Dwicky to the kitchen and stayed near the entryway as he watched the other. Only after a few minutes did he actually speak up in a low voice. "I did what you asked."

"…Thanks." Dwicky weakly spoke before he popped the pain killer in his mouth and downed it with a glass of water from the sink. He drank the rest before setting the cup on the counter, heading back for his room, not really caring what Trec did with himself.

Trec watched as Dwicky walked away, but refused to give up so easily on the other. Despite how touchy the other man would probably be. He walked away from the kitchen and followed after Dwicky, walking behind him. "I wanted to come over and check up on you. You were so out of it on the drive over here. It got me a little worried." He reached a hand out to try and touch Dwicky's shoulder. "Not to mention I could smell smoke on you right when you answered the door and who knows what you've been drinking."

"See for yourself." Dwicky gestured with an uncaring sweep of hand to the room. Bottles of hard liquor littered the floor and night table, along with a filled ashtray, butts scattered around it when Dwicky had been too drunk to care how to snuff them out. "See. Nothing to worry about." Dwicky crawled onto the bed and under the covers, his back to Trec. "Everything's fine."

"I can see that." The sarcasm was obvious in Trec's voice. He turned his eyes back to the huddled form in the bed and let out a tired sigh. "I'll just pretend you don't look like absolute death right now." He knew the words had come out a little cruel, but he wasn't in the best of moods himself. In the end he let out a heavy sigh and walked over to sit on the edge of the bed with his back to Dwicky, resting his head in his hands.

"Have a drink." Dwicky muttered. "...You sound like you need one too."

Trec raised his head at the suggestion and glanced back at Dwicky. After a few seconds his eyes moved to one of the bottles on the night table and without even hesitating, Trec shifted around on the bed to grab one. It caused him to lean over Dwicky, but at the moment he didn't seem to care. Once he had the bottle he settled back down against the head board and took a long swig from it. He barely flinched as he pulled the bottle away and only narrowed his eyes at the label that was on it. "This is the worst day ever."

"Understatement." Dwicky very much agreed.

"No kidding." The words were mumbled and after he spoke them Trec took another drink from the bottle. "Me and my big mouth. Who knew that hypnotizing someone could lead to so much unwanted bull shit." He let out an angry noise as his head fell back against the head board.

Dwicky rolled onto his back, staring dully at the ceiling. "So..." he started distantly, moving to sit up enough to lean heavily against the head board "What happened between you and Macks?" He finally looked at Trec. It was an easy guess.

Trec kept his gaze upwards and stayed silent. His eyes narrowed once more and he refused to look at Dwicky when he finally answered the other in a quiet voice. "There is no me and Macks anymore."

Dwicky's eyes widened a little and he shook his head, rubbing his face as he gave a worn out sigh. "Tough break." He reached over to take the bottle from Trec to take a long drink of his own, chasing the painkillers he knew it would make him sick but he was already three quarters of the way there. "Thought you two were just 'friends with benefits' anyway." He handed the bottle back.

Trec took the bottle and stared it at once more. "I guess I did say that, didn't I?" He shrugged his shoulders and took another drink before going on. "Marda is moving in with him. He can't have me hanging around anymore."

"Wow." Dwicky's brows raised. He clunked his head tiredly against the head board. "Guess he really likes her ...That sucks."

Trec frowned at those words and clutched the bottle tighter. "I guess so..." He brought the bottle back up to his lips and drank for much longer than the last few times. Once he pulled the bottle away he scowled and shut his eyes, thudding his head rather hard against the head board once more.

Dwicky stole the bottle again to take another swig. He swayed the bottle to and fro, watching the liquid move inside. "…Ya'know, if you weren't such a blind bastard you'd see he's liked you from day one. And if you were smart" he pointed at Trec with the bottle "you'd get off that fuck'n lazy ass of yours and go sweep that hypno-dentist off his goddamn feet... But it's probably too late now." Dwicky took another drink. "But hey, yer right, relationships are crap. Miserable things. You don't want to end up like me: drunk, lovesick, pathetic, lonely and unemployed." He scoffed some. "...You'd probably cheat on him anyway."

Trec kept his eyes closed the entire time Dwicky spoke. The last few words had his eyes finally opening to stare up at the ceiling. "He thought that too. He thought there were people on the side. Not once did I ever. He was the only one the entire time. But how do you make someone believe otherwise when your reputation for that kind of thing is complete shit?" He snatched the bottle back from Dwicky, but didn't take a drink. his head lowering once again to stare at what was inside. "If he wants to be married to Marda and have however many little ankle biters with her, then fine… whatever. I can't stop him." He took another long drink before he went on. "I'm fine with being drunk, pathetic, lonely, and more than likely unemployed."

Dwicky stared at Trec, a little more than surprised. He looked at the bed with a decided 'huh'. He rubbed his eye, raw from tears. "Really? From when to when were you monogamous with Macks? This before or after Marda?" Cuz, damn, coulda fooled me... 'specially with how you acted in the park. Then again… 'lot coulda changed with the time I was gone." He exhaled heavily with a small groan. "Never did get you two."

"I know I said some things that made it seem like I didn't care, but I never had anyone on the side." Trec finally turned his head to look at Dwicky. "I know how much everyone thinks I should grow up. Every single day it's the same thing. There's only so much of it I can take too, ya know?" He narrowed his eyes and looked back down. "I figured it would be easier to not have to worry about screwing up if I wasn't in a real relationship, but now look at me. I've screwed up worse now than ever before." He took another long swig then handed the bottle back over to Dwicky. "At least you did something right, even though you're miserable."

Dwicky took the bottle and frowned. "…I guess. Least Macks didn't hear voices that told him to constantly hate you." He frowned even more and downed his sorrows with a good hard drink, flinching at the awful taste and the even worse feeling in his stomach. "Relationships suck. If you want my sound counsel an' advice- love _no one_. Not even your mom. No one. Not even that stupid stereo system of yours. Cuz when something goes wrong, and explodes- it'll just hurt all the more... and they're'll be heart juice all over the floor... and you'll be sad." Dwicky downed the rest of the bottle. He patted the bottom of it as if that would make more come out. So he let the bottle roll off the bed before he grabbed a new one. "Being sad sucks." He sniffed wetly.

"That advice is way too hard to follow." Trec flinched, realizing he had just pretty much admitted to being in love, but hoped Dwicky was too drunk to really care. He reached over and grabbed the new bottle from Dwicky and started to open it as he kept speaking. "I will agree about the sad part, though." He finally got the bottle opened and threw the trash aside as well as the cap. He took the first swig before he handed it back over to Dwicky as he spoke up again. "I might have been able to deal with weird freaky voices that hated me rather than feeling like I've been crushed all because he wants a perfect life."

"Nah, he just wants to be the perfect boyfriend for her." Dwicky pointed at Trec with the bottle. "Just like you wanted to with him but failed miserably, cuz you failed to tell him you were together when said you weren't but really... uh... were. So." He blinked. "Wait... _Macks_ was the cheating bastard throughout all this?" He blinked harder. "Whoa. It's official. My brain just popped in several different places. Huh..." He took a drink, grimacing at the new taste of a different liquor. "Echk… I promised Dib the perfect life. We were gunna move away from this city and start new together." He rubbed an eye, the pain washed over him again as he remembered his dream; it had been so vivid. "Just him, me... a house... didn't matter where." his voice cracked.

Trec frowned at the information he had just heard and kept his eyes on the bed. When he finally started to speak again he didn't even try to take the bottle back from Dwicky much like he had the few times before. "Dib was really upset. I think he was in a state of shock for a good long while before he just broke down. Macks and I, we tried to talk to him. Macks was a little tougher on him, but I don't know, on the ride back to his place he still wouldn't let go of that piece of paper or that ring." He finally reached out to grab the bottle. "I guess we were a little stupid for fighting in front of him." He took a drink.

Dwicky sniffed, but it did little good to keep the aching wetness from his eyes, or the destructive guilt and sorrow that ate away at his insides. He could imagine Dib's reaction, the horrible state it would leave him in, it was all he had thought about going home. He looked to his finger, feeling where the band had been; it felt so bare. "It was stupid of me to get involved with him. I dunno what I was thinking. It almost seems like that… -that was the reason I went back." He stared at his hand, the image blurring. "But all I wanted was to come back to that poor kid, and apologize, to hug him and say sorry for being just another bump in his tough road. But it was more than that when I finally got there and saw what I really did." He made a soft torn sound. "I screwed that poor kid up. I mean I _really_ screwed him up, Trec. And what I thought I could give back to make up for everything… I felt endlessly indebted to him." Dwicky took in a shaky wet breath, looking away. "We thought we could record over a painful moment. Ha! Not so easy." He sniffed again. "Takes months, years to build up something special. But it only took seconds to _smash_" he slammed a fist into the mattress "it all to pieces!" Dwicky paused, blinking away the tears from his eyes. "Oh." He rubbed his nose as he looked curiously at Trec. "Macks knows too?"

Trec had looked to the side at Dwicky long ago while the other man was speaking. A sad expression on his own face, but it was far from pity. He felt worse for Dwicky than he did for himself. The question seemed to startle him, not really expecting it, but in the end he only shrugged as he looked down at the bottle in his hands once again. "While you were in the room with Dib, Macks wanted to know what was going on. So, I told him what was up. He thought it was messed up. I think he really upset Dib more when he said it was sick. You should have heard how the kid yelled at him." Trec shook his head. "I think he came around somewhat. It's really hard to say. My mind kind of went elsewhere."

"Doesn't matter anyway." Dwicky muttered low and bitterly. "Doesn't matter what anyone thinks, or knows. Nothing matters. And definitely not what Macks thinks of any of it. Who cares." His voice was cracking worse with each word and he sniffed hard. "S'time to move on. Forget." He reached over and took the bottle from Trec. He looked so desperately sad at it. "...Or drown myself in a bottle, and chuck it out to sea." He took a long drink, nearly regretting it when the liquid lashed back and nearly came back up. He swallowed hard and grimaced, clutching the bottle hard. "I'll leave again. Leave this. Fer good. Just travel as far as I can from this miserable planet and forget all about cute little insane boys." His vision blurred, and he blinked it away, feeling the tears plip on his hands, on the bottle.

Trec shook his head at those words and kept his eyes down. "I don't think one cute little insane boy is going to be able to forget you as easily." He reached over and grabbed the bottle back to take a long swig, flinching a bit after he took the bottle away. "I should tag along. No one needs me here. It'll be like a miserable road trip." There was a quiet noise outside the window that started out soft. Small little hits against the glass. Trec leaned over to look past Dwicky and as soon as he did the noise started to become louder. The once clear window, now distorted. "Just great. I hate this fucking weather..." Trec let out a sigh and leaned back against the head board with an annoyed noise as he took another drink.

Dwicky looked out the window at the rain. It suited his mood but brought just as painful memories with it; star gazing and Dib's dream. It made the tears come harder, but he still couldn't look away. ".. Bad day t' watch the stars." he murmured. "Good... I don't think I could stand to look at them. Or the sun." He let out a belch he didn't even try to muffle, smacking his lips in disgust when he tasted the alcohol a second time around, and whatever it was he ate that day. He slumped against the head board. "Fuck Marda. Really, jus' fuck her and take Macks. Take em right up against the white wall right 'n front of 'er. Ya'av'a right, you were there first." He made an indignant noise. "No reason the both of us should die miserable... and drunk."

"And ruin Macks chances at marrying his perfect girl?" Trec frowned after he spoke the words. "I doubt he would be very happy with me at all if I did that. It's hard to figure anything out anymore. He finally chose and it wasn't me. I fucked up. Simple as that." He stared into the bottle for a long while before he spoke up again, his attention moving back to Dwicky, carefully watching his friend. "Are you really going to be able to forget about him and move on?"

Dwicky clunked his head back against the head board. He stared up at the ceiling. "...I think I'd have better luck giving birth to a three headed porcupine that's on fire."

"That was not a pretty mental image." Trec shook his head before immediately taking another long drink to try and drown it from his brain. He smacked his lips a few times and stared ahead. "Nope, still there." He shrugged and handed the bottle back to Dwicky, thudding his own head back against the head board as well. "How are you going to be certain he stops hearing them if you two never see each other?"

Dwicky gave a weak smirk Trec's way. "I'll send one you losers t' go check on 'em for me." He shrugged some. "Maybe Fwenn... She'll smother him with so much love and affection..." He sighed, closing his aching eyes a moment. "Then she'll murder me in my sleep. But at least he'll still have someone to cuddle him..." He took a small drink.

"As long as it's not Kinam, I guess. I don't see him as the affectionate type, family or not." Trec kept his eyes on the ceiling and after a few moments he began to count a few of the cracks that had formed over the years. There were only a couple he recognized from a long time ago. The rest were a mystery to him. "Sorry about all of this. It was my bright idea. I never should have suggested it at all."

Dwicky gave a careless shrug. "We got the result we wanted I guess... S'what counts, I s'pose." He blinked dully. "Kinam has a family? A kid? Wow… I have been gone a long, long time." His skin prickled as a cold rushed up his spine; They were suppose to be a family. Just the two of them. That's all he needed. That's all they needed. Now, there was nothing. How he was going to tell his traveling buddies about this, to save face, he didn't know anymore. "We waited, ya'know." Dwicky spoke out of no where. "I was s' damn animate about waiting till he was out. I was so scared to touch him when he visited out. Like if I touched too hard, kissed too hard, he'd fall apart and we'd have nothing." He made a soft sound. "I was so careful. _So_ careful with him.. It was the same day he got out that we-..." Dwicky pressed his lips together. "I gave so much, everything, anything, it was his. But it still feels like I took more than I gave." He couldn't keep the choked sound in.

Trec shook his head at that and let his eyes fall back down to the bed. "For everything I've seen you do for that kid and how completely nuts you are over him. I wouldn't dare say you took too much. Something happened between the two of you and you were making up for it." He let out a sigh. "I thought you were doing a damn good job. Being able to see you two together at the mall, it was easy to tell you were both happy with each other." Trec narrowed his eyes as one of his hands twisted around the sheet on the bed. "For something to still be stuck in his head as some sort of resentment towards you, I just don't understand it."

"Hell if I know. If he can't be happy now- I dunno what the hell that kid wants from me! I tried! And-... -and hell if it did a lot of good." Dwicky scoffed hard. "He'll find someone better. Now that his head's clear, someone his age... Someone who'll ...-who he'll be able to walk in public with, hold hands, kiss, cuddle. Dib'll smile again, he'll laugh again... without me. He'll be normal. He'll be happy. And if he's happy, I'm happy." Dwicky laughed sharply. "What a bunch of bullshit." He gestured to the night table beside Trec. "Hand me a smoke 'n my lighter."

Trec didn't even argue to those words much like he had at the mall. Instead, he pulled a cigarette out of the pack and handed it over as well as the lighter, settling back down after. "I guess something inside of him is still really hurt. He could try and be as happy as he wanted, but there would still be that part of him that just doesn't want to let it go." He shrugged his shoulders. "Being left alone hurts. You know it. Now I know it." He moved a hand up and waved it around. "Hell, half this damn city probably knows it." His hand dropped and his voice dropped with it. "Guess it was just a bit harder for that kid."

Dwicky rested the cigarette on his lips and lit it up. He tossed the lighter aside and took a long drag, slumping back again as he just let the smoke exhale messily from his mouth. He didn't have much to say to what Trec said. He held the cigarette between two fingers, dully watching the smoke curl from the burning end. He took another drag, waiting until his lungs burned and his throat grew dry before he exhaled it out in a misty stream.

Trec kept just as silent, his eyes on the wall across from them. The only real sound was the hard rain that continued to splash outside and hit against the window. After a few minutes Trec shook his head and reached for the bottle that Dwicky still had. "Quit hogging it." After those words he brought it to his lips to take a drink.

Dwicky slowly blinked, he almost didn't open his eyes again. Ashes drifted from the end of the cigarette to the blankets, though he didn't seem to care. He brought it to his lips again, exhaling slowly. "...You'll prolly end up best man too." He didn't look at Trec, he didn't look at anything. "... God parent soon after."

Trec narrowed his eyes and stayed silent for a long time. He moved the bottle side to side, watching the liquid inside much like Dwicky had done before. "That would be too awkward. I couldn't do it." His voice was still quiet when he finally spoke up. "It would hurt way too much."

Dwicky snorted. "Marda would wonder why you wouldn't wanna. And Macks would end up covering your ass.. _again_." He nudged Trec at that. "Then they'll throw that privilege on me. But I'll probably be on another planet by then. Drinking so much Plookesian liquor I'll be peeing rainbows." He looked out the window. "...And I gotta give my notice to 'daddy'." He looked at Trec. "You're going to have to drop off whatever clothes he still has here." He looked to the ceiling. "...'Cept Thee Coat."

Trec raised a brow at most of the things Dwicky said. In the end he shrugged it all off, figuring the other was pretty damn drunk and just talking nonsense. He turned his eyes on Dwicky and stared at his friend for a few seconds before he finally only questioned the last few words. "What coat?"

Dwicky blinked at Trec a good few times. "Coat? No coat. I didn't say coat." He looked back to the window again. He flicked ashes on the other side of the bed before he took another drag from it. "I said... uh... I said 'goat'. Yea. The goat is mine." He coughed.

Trec shook his head and nudged Dwicky in the side. "Yeah right. Come on, fess up. What did you mean?" He looked ahead once more. "It's not like you have anything else to hide, right?"

Dwicky's reserve easily crumbled, he didn't have much left to stand on anyway. Reluctantly he moved so he could reach into a pillow case and pull out a rather small, rather worn down trench coat, what had been black was now a weather and time beaten dark grey. Holding the cigarette between two fingers he was remarkably careful to keep the two apart, despite having no coordination anymore from drinking. "... It was his. He wore it all the time up until they locked em up. They locked it up with the rest of his stuff." His expression softened at the sight of the coat. "... The first time he got out to visit I was able to get a hold of his bag of stuff, and this. I just... I kept it." He pulled it to his chest to cuddle, burying his lips and nose in it. It still smelt like Dib, and it had his brows furrowing some. "…I don't think he knows. He hasn't asked."

Trec's expression softened once he had looked back at Dwicky, watching how the other took such care of the piece of clothing. After a few moments he shook his head and looked down at the bottle, lifting one hand to pick at the label. "I have a feeling you became more important to him than an old coat. You probably still are. It's hard to say what's going through his mind right now." He let out a heavy sigh and looked back at Dwicky, his eyes on the coat for a few seconds before they moved up to his friend. "Would you really leave this place again?"

Dwicky didn't nod right away. "…It would be fer the best. If I stay... it'll only make things harder. ... Too much temptation. I know I'd crack... just by looking at him. And he'll cling so hard I'd never get him off anyway..." He hugged the coat tighter, as if it were the real person instead of a piece of clothing. "…S'just too hard, Trec."

Trec frowned and looked away once again. He kept silent again with narrowed eyes before he finally shook his head while tapping a few fingers against the bottle. "We've all been doing what we think is best this entire time. I'm starting to think we would have been better off just saying fuck it and doing what we feel like. Maybe we would be less miserable." He lifted the bottle, finishing off the rest. He tossed it aside once it was empty and leaned back against the head board while shutting his eyes.

Dwicky took another drag of his cigarette before he put it out on the night table on his side. "But that would make life easy, and happy, and defeat the purpose of it." He moved closer to Trec so he could rest his head on the other's shoulder, too tired to keep it up on his own, just wanting the comfort of another. When he shut his eyes his consciousness swam in vertigo; sleep was sounding good again, an escape from the misery eating away at his insides along with the liquor and nicotine.

Trec opened his eyes and glanced to the side at Dwicky. Just as quickly his eyes were closed once more and he kept himself rested back against the head board, sliding down only a bit to get more comfortable considering the new weight against him. It continued to stay silent for much longer. The only noise left was the rain outside that continued to hit against the bedroom window.

"...You should tell 'em." Dwicky's voice spoke up distantly.

Trec barely opened his eyes and let out a small noise. "Too scared. I always screw something up. I've failed through everything most my whole life. I don't need to fail at something that really matters."

"…Betchya he wants to hear it." Dwicky moved closer to Trec, cuddling nearer to the other's side, the liquor eaten away his inhibitions, just wanting to feel less lonely.

Trec paid no attention to Dwicky's small bit of movement. His attention stayed focused ahead as he thought over what the other said. "I guess so. I don't know. He would probably rather hear Marda say it now."

Dwicky slung an arm around Trec's middle, deciding to make himself comfortable on his friend since he didn't seem to be paying any mind. "…I've never known ye'ta'be so selfless... s'miracle, baby Jesus." He rubbed an eye before he settled back down again.

Trec rolled his eyes at those words. "I guess heartbreak taught me a lesson." The frown returned to his face and he let his eyes fall closed once more. "Of course, it's too late now. I should have listened to you instead of acting like I didn't care. Hell, I should have listened to everyone. I'm so stupid."

"Mmmhmm." Dwicky easily agreed.

"Gee, thanks." Trec mumbled the words under his breath. He gave a another heavy sigh, but kept silent afterwards, not having much energy anymore. All of the alcohol left him tired. topped with how drained he felt from feeling terribly depressed.

"Tell em." Dwicky repeated again, his voice drifting.

Trec gave a small noise at those words and was about to protest again, but in the end he kept his mouth shut. The only noise he gave was a small 'hmm' after all was said and done, staying as he was.

Dwicky pulled the trench coat closer, burying his face in it. It wasn't long before he drifted off into the black intoxication of nothing, and somewhere in it, he hoped he could continue that sweet dream he had, and at least pretend to be happy there with his facsimile. 


	42. READ FIRST

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